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I’ll try and keep this as brief as possible. Sorry if I rant on and on. As I went from 240 lbs to 390 lbs between 2009-2019 I slowly hid myself away from friends and family. The truth is I was in denial about how bad things were getting and I was embarrassed. I was ashamed of how I couldn’t keep up with my friends just walking around the city or fitting into booths at restaurants for family milestones. I was out of breath walking into work from the parking lot. I felt like if I could avoid these things in front of other people, if other people couldn’t confirm how limited I had become, it somehow made it less true. I have missed SO many adventures and huge important events in my loved ones lives simply because I was physically unable. This hurts my heart. In 2018 I ditched a good friend’s bachelorette weekend out of town because I was so anxious about how I wouldn’t be able to keep up with everyone. Like literally I could not walk around and I felt ridiculous going to clubs with girls wearing their best outfits and me in an oversized T-shirt. By that point I couldn’t stand for 5 mins without my lower back screaming. Our friendship has not been the same since. I have always thought that was the turning point in our friendship. Now fast forward to late 2019. I happened to be invited to another good friend’s bachelorette weekend. This is a friend I met in college and we were so close we lived together for a couple of years. This is also when my depression/weight gain really got bad. I did my best to hide it, but I’m sure it was obvious. Over the last 7 years I have make excuses to avoid meeting up with her because she is so active. I even prayed she wouldn’t ask me to be a bridesmaid. How sad is that? I really didn’t think I could make it through the dress shopping bit. Pre-surgery I was 390 lbs and a size 26. This friend has run the NYC marathon and I was at least 220 lbs heavier than any other girl in her friend circle. When I was invited on the bachelorette weekend I immediately thought of ways to get out of it. I told one of the maids of honor that I didn’t think it would be a good idea since it was still early after surgery and I wasn’t sure how I’d feel. Well it’s been almost 5 months and I’ve been so lucky to have zero complications. My mobility is much better too. I am also sober by choice. I was never a big drinker anyways. I partied pretty hard as a teen so by the time I got to college I was somewhat past that phase. It doesn’t make me feel good and now with a sleeve I feel like alcohol serves me no purpose. Anyways what I am looking for is real honest advice. I feel immense guilt over declining this invite. I have thought about how I would feel if I was my friend. I could see how she would be upset or disappointed. Am I wrong to not go? I don’t drink and I’m trying so hard to stick to my diet. I know if I really wanted to I could make it work. I don’t want people to tell me what I want to hear. I guess I just want someone to say they understand what I’m saying and feeling. I don’t have anyone in my family or friends that are even overweight. I feel like no one can relate. Has anyone else been through this? Did things get better as you lost weight?

yes. I had my first glass at least two years out of surgery - and I have a glass maybe three or four times a year. I can feel it pretty strongly after just one glass. Alcoholism runs in my family, so I've always been very careful with alcohol - but now I'm even more so since I know that's a risk of WLS.

I am not restricted with any food, but we set a few goals each month, such as getting off caffeine ( hard to do), giving up alcohol ( easy to do), increase water to 60 oz ( I started at 30 and at 50 oz now), start exercising and maintain it, try out different protein shakes, add fruit and veggie into my diet consistently, add multi vit and the calcium citrate pills to lunch and dinner. And to not drink for 30minutes before and 30 minutes after each meal. This is very hard to do, but I'm trying.

I am now 10 days into the full 3mg dose. The side effects, if any, have been minimal for me. I have had some general sour stomach, other than that, not much negative from it. My appetite has decreased substantially, but my late night cravings for a sweet snack have not left completely. With the medicine, I've also started the intermittent fasting, not eating anything until 10AM. Once I eat my lunch, I am ready to eat dinner at 6PM and typically the late night cookie or jello cup goes down. Overall I feel good having dropped 26 lbs in 6 weeks, but most of the loss came in the first 4 weeks with the new medicine and reduction in alcohol. I'm still having a glass of wine or two, but not the daily 2-4 drinks prior to the new year. Overall, I like the appetite suppressant....yet it's the lifestyle change that has me wanting more.

RE: coffee/caffeine Doc/team is fine with me me drinking coffee, though did ask me to refrain for 1 month post op (which I did) Now I drink maybe 1-2 coffees and 1-2 teas a day. I don't drink any pop/soda (diet or not)...with the exception of club soda as a mixer in alcoholic drinks occasionally (though I don't think it has any caffeine in it anyway....?)

I drank alcohol 3 weeks after my surgery and felt like crap about it. Youll feel liike you messed up a lot of times during this journey you just have to accept the fact you did it, take responsibility, and move on. Thats what i have to do, im still very hard on myself with certain things but when i get back on track im good. ☺️

Yesterday Friday, Feb 14 Maintenance : 5'2" / 1.25 yr PO Sleeve / 116.6 lbs ---------------------------------------- Had a blast last night with Mr for V-day. Got him to agree at one point to go to this club at least once a month. I doubt he remembers saying so though, shoulda got it on paper, LOL Also to my surprise, all the chocolate and drink mixers I put IN me, STAYED in me last night (i.e., no dumping, just a little tiredness after dessert, but that may have been the alcohol...) ---------------------------------------- 9:30am - black coffee w/ stevia 1:30pm - salad greens w/ vinaigrette + carrots + cucumber + 1.5 oz tomatoes + 3 chicken wings w/ 2 tbsp hot sauce 4:30pm - skinny tea latte + + 3 chicken wings w/ 2 tbsp hot sauce + 2 Lindor chocolate hearts 9:00pm - 2:00am 2 oz bbq chicken breast + 3/4 cup roasted vegetables w/ feta + 1/4 cup spring mix salad w/ balsamic vinaigrette 1/4 a chocolate raspberry tartufo (i.e., filled ice cream ball dipped in chocolate) w/ 4 tbsp whipped cream and one of the hugest strawberries I have ever seen. 1 mojito 2 martinis 1 dark & stormy 2 Lindor chocolate hearts --------------------------------------- Totals: 1841 cals - 54g Protein 88g NET carbs - 70g fat

I am in this boat now also. 2 years of drinking has taken its toll on me, my marriage among other things. TBH I didnt want to quit until last weekend. I think I hit rock bottom and said enough is enough. I found an audio book called The Alcohol Experiment and began listening to it. It is a 30 day stop drinking approach and I am on day 2. The narrator makes so much sense and walks you through what you are going to face on this 30 day journey. I hope in 30 days I am better

You have sent your body into a whirlwind between the surgery and the diet changes - Also you may have gone off the alcohol and caffiene - I have always been a light sleeper and post surgery it has even got worse, I added a few new pillows and a Sleep sound machine to my room and it seems to be helping

As long as alcohol isn’t a trigger for over eating I personally think it’s fine. This is about quality of lifestyle and continuing on a journey of health, which includes mental health.

** P.S. sorry for all those empty posts up there...no idea how that happened...?? ** Yesterday Tuesday, Feb 11 Maintenance : 5'2" / 1.25 yr PO Sleeve / 116.0 lbs ---------------------------------------- 8+. Hours. Uninterrupted. Sleep. *drops mic* Oh, what a difference sleep makes. I honestly feel better this morning than I have been in about 2 weeks. I think the fact that I only had 1 coffee/caffeine product for the entire day helped. But also maybe the fact that I was pretty tipsy when we got home from dinner was also a factor. Not ideal, given my self-diagnosed increasing fondness of alcohol, but I'll take it...this time. And, as if the universe were giving me a symbolic high five, its a clear-skied, sun-shiny day today with a balmy temp of 1°C ☀️ (Yeah, yeah, I know 1°C is c-c-c-c-old for many of you, but its a FEBRUARY morning in Toronto, people. This is WARM! Almost t-shirt weather, lol) ---------------------------------------- 9:00am - coffee w/ stevia 6:00pm to 9:30pm - 2 tbsp foie gras 6 oysters + 1 tbsp seafood sauce + 1 tbsp horseradish 1 tbsp beef tartare + 1 toast cracker 1.5 oz smoked black cod + 1/4 cup sauteed spinach (w/ capers and smoked bacon) 3 glasses red wine 2oz calvados (apple brandy) --------------------------------------- Totals: 872 cals - 31g Protein 34g NET carbs - 36g fat

Hi- I just got back on this sight after 4 years because my alcohol issue has taken over. I’ve gained back half the weight in past two years. Granted, my children’s father left, my dad died, and best friend died, plus a shoulder and two knee surgeries. Basically, life has gotten really hard and my drinking ratcheted up then started to change. I’m looking for answers and help. I wasn’t like this before surgery.

Ugh I was sooo good until I was okay’d for breads, pastas, rice and alcohol. Then I got super social so I started drinking wine and whiskey whenever I’d go out. I also still munch out on some carbs every now and then. Also whoever said peanut butter! I agree it’s addicting!!

Yeah it basically goes right through with mine I think! I haven't had any real bad food issues except when I was stupid enough to use suagr free syrup with sugar alcohols. I died. Lol. Sent from my Pixel 3 using Tapatalk

Fats. Fat has more cal per gram than both protein and carbs (9 vs 4) And for most fat doesn't trigger cravings, instead suppressing hunger which is why Keto is such a booming lifestyle. Honestly each macro nutrient has it's merits and purpose for optimal health which is why food fit for human consumption contain them. I think water & alcohol are the exceptions (real geniuses correct me if I'm wrong ❤) As you move towards maintenance more research is warranted to decide what your long-term lifestyle will look like. Here's a research journal to consider (oh and I'm sure you'll find plenty on either side of the argument) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/14672862/

I originally went with sleeve for the same reasons many have posted here - I didn't like the idea of my intestines being rerouted, I didn't want the vitamin regimen for the rest of my life, and it just seemed more extreme than what I needed. However, I'm now less than a month away from getting a revision to gastric bypass, and I try not to feel angry that I didn't do that from the start (mostly because I've paid for 2 surgeries). Unfortunately I had to self-pay in Mexico, and my experience with that is that the doctors will basically agree with what you want and rarely take the time to consider your own personal needs. I live in Japan and there really isn't any doctor or program for me to use here, so I was stuck. The reality was even though I didn't have any co-morbidities, I had 150 pounds to lose and was a sugar addict. Bypass was probably the option I should have gone with from the beginning. But now I'm getting my surgery done in Tallinn (Estonia) from a very reputable place, and one of the reasons why I chose it is because the surgeon had a very specific plan for ME, as opposed to himself, like so many other surgeons. One thing I know from my failed sleeve is that being (or having been) obese is like being an alcoholic - once one, always one (your fat cells never disappear, they just shrink, waiting to be filled again). You have to be vigilant about what your triggers are and how to avoid them. There will never be a time in the future when you can go back to how you were - it's just too easy to fall off the wagon. I know now that it's normal to always feel a little bit hungry, that if I feel full then I've eaten too much, and that I can never eat sweet things - once I start it's hard to stop. It's just better if I never start.

Yesterday Thursday, Feb 6 Maintenance : 5'2" / 1.25 yr PO Sleeve / 118.0 lbs ---------------------------------------- I just couldn't get to sleep last night, and am running on a bit over an hour of sleep (and I'm not even watching tennis!). As a result ended up eating around 1am (I was actually hungry), and again at 4am (I WAS NOT hungry). Also, I am becoming a walking cliché: The lack of motivation to exercise and make better food choices aside, now I'm probably developing the makings of an alcohol transfer addiction. #selfDiagnosingMakesMeAHypochondriach. I am realizing that for the past two days now, I have actually been drinking not for the enjoyment of it, but for the sake of making myself feel mentally and physically better. This realization came to me this morning when I was contemplating about having a shot of liquor at 9am, AGAIN (I had a shot of lemoncello yesterday morning AT 9AM and then wanted some Gin this morning to "re-live" the good feels). Spoiler alert: I put the Gin back in the cabinet. But I wasn't happy about it. Whomp, whomp. Anyhoo, the blues continue, but I am making a concentrated effort to be less angry today. ---------------------------------------- 9:00am - black coffee w/ stevia + 1 fl oz lemoncello 12:30pm - salad greens + vinaigrette + carrots + cucumber + 2.5 oz roasted brussel sprouts + 1 leftover BBQ chicken lettuce wrap from the day before 2:30pm - skinny tea latte 4:00pm - Grande Starbucks Blonde Americano Misto w/ 1 pump of sugar-free vanilla 7:00pm - salad greens + vinaigrette + carrots + cucumber + 1.5 oz avocado + 5 oz steak 1:00am - salad greens + vinaigrette + red onions + 1/8 cup avocado cream (sour cream, greek yogurt, avocado, lime, garlic) + 1 oz blueberries + 1/2 oz havarti cheese + 1/4 shredded cabbage 1 oz bbq pork loin 4:00am - 4 squares dark chocolate + 1/2 cup Good North protein ice cream + 1.5 oz chicharron ---------------------------------------- Totals: 1561 cals - 92g Protein 87g NET carbs - 82g fat

I definitely understand this. I've been telling pretty much everyone in my inner circle that I am going through with surgery, even updating my Facebook with my current weight loss progress, and it seems like I've got a good amount of outside support! My main concern is I drink like a fish (not alcohol, but water, for instance) and it seems like I won't be able to chug water like I am able to now. I think I can handle the food, though. I've been replacing 1-2 of my meals a day with a protein shake as of recently and its not terrible! I am happy to hear that you feel that way. I honestly think its the best choice for people who struggle with their health and losing any weight at all is a step in the right direction to a longer, healthier life.

I had a heart to heart with my surgeon during my last (2 month) checkup. About alcohol and soda. He said in reference to alcohol to "live your life" it won't hurt your stomach any more than someone who hasn't had surgery, but encouraged me to drink in moderation, which I do. He even went so far as to say a few glasses of wine or beer is fine. Which led me to ask about soda/beer, he said that it wouldn't stretch my stomach, but could give a false feeling of fullness and lead to me not getting in all my protein and nutrients. But as long as I'm hitting my nutrition marks then I should be fine. I've had soda a few times with no issue and despite the username, I've only had 1 beer in a social setting, I don't really want go down that path yet until I get closer to my goals, I can justify a 0 calorie soda but not a 100+ calorie beer.

Okay so fasting update: Monday thru Tuesday was my 18 hr fast, but both Monday and Tuesday were low cal days. Looks like I got in 500-ish Monday and 750-ish Tuesday. Yesterday I felt like eating every 3-4 hours, and I did. Oddly enough, I was also craving alcohol, but didn’t have any cuz i do 5:2 most weeks and it wasn’t the weekend. Trying to figure out where my intense wine craving from yesterday came from. Even though I ate every 3-4 hours, my “feasting” was moderate. I supplemented with extra protein shake and had an extra serving of veggies and hummus for an afternoon snack. The wine craving was so bad last night that I broke down at 9pm and made myself a chai latte with a dollop of whipped cream on top (only 100 calories, but it shocked me how much I “needed” it)

It’s funny because Naltrexone was developed for opium addicted and alcoholics and at the time my bariatric doctor was prescribing it off labor because it was proven to reduce sugar cravings. They now have a weightloss drug called Contrave and it’s a combination of naltrexone and bupropion. When I was taking it five years ago I’m pretty sure the pharmacist thought I was a Verizon addict or alcoholic because they always looked at me in a strange way and it wasn’t my imagination. I tried the Contrave but it didn’t work for me because the dosage of naltrexone is too low. My current bariatric surgeon said if my sugar/carb cravings come back she will prescribe the naltrexone again. It really was a miracle drug for me and the first time I really understood what it meant to be an addict and changed my perception of people addicted to drugs. The sense of freedom I felt to no longer crave and eat carbs until I was about to burst is indescribable. I’Ly’s not just about breaking a habit like smoking. There is a chemical imbalance and going months or even years without sugar will not “cure” us of addiction to sugar. 25 years ago I was a body builder and for over 3 years I lived a low carb life. Got pregnant with my daughter and went into early labor. Put on complete bed rest for 3 months so had to stop weightlifting and jogging. My church family was cooking my meals, which was a lot of rice and pasta and chicken. Beggars can’t be choosy so I ate whatever they brought and in those 3 months my weight ballooned to over 200lbs for the first time in my life. I did manage to lose weight after my daughter’s birth but never was able to get back to my goal weight of 145 until I was put on Naltrexone.

Isn’t it crazy how our body is addicted to the very thing that’s bad for us? The only way I was able to resist carbs was because my doctor put me on naltrexone 50mg daily and for the first time in my life I was able to not only not even want carbs, I no longer wanted wine or any alcohol. I really thought I had the carb addiction beat but as soon as I stopped taking naltrexone the insane cravings returned. Add menopause to those cravings and I put back on 50 pounds in less than 6 months. The worst thing about insulin resistance is that my body couldn’t even process good carbs in fruit and eating fruit triggers my cravings for all carbs. People don’t understand that not all weight gain comes from bad eating. I gain weight even if I eat too much fruit. So glad to have someone here who understands that for some people, even good sugar is bad for us. I absolutely loved the way I felt physically on the Whole Foods diet, my body was so clean that I could actually smell the odor from meat eating people. I could smell everything!! It was as if all of my senses were heightened!! Maybe my new sleeve has changed my physiology, seeing that I can’t tolerate fat I might be able to process fruit now. I’ll definitely try again when I’m on regular foods.

Ok, I am waaaay shorter (5'2") and smaller than you and a 47 yr old female. I got below my goal weight at the time (127 lbs) around 7 months, eating about 600-700 cals a day at that time. It took me a 2-3 months to work my way up to 1500 cals a day (both out of fear AND restriction). I did this by introducing: nuts/nut butters full fat everything avocados olive oil, butter red meats berries cheese chia seeds chicharron (yeah, maybe not the best choice, but I love it, lol) occasionally allowing myself previously off-limit foods (desserts, alcohol) I continued to lose weight and bounce up and down as I figured stuff out, I got as low as 113 in August and got to a scary 109 lbs last month after PS. This morning (at 1 year, 3 months) I weighed in at 118 lbs (me and my bod seem to be happy between 113 and 118). I am pretty lean, averaging about 12-15% body fat (so says the machine) and have a modest amount of muscle you can see actually see on my frame. You can see what my frame looks like in the Albums section of my profile. I normally run 5km a day and do 15 mins of strength training daily as well as do other activities (dance, bouldering, zumba, hot yoga)...though my PS recovery has put a halt on this and is depressing me...but I digress... I also normally average about 1800-2000 cals a day. Soooooo if shrimp like me can maintain with up to 2000 cals a day, it is not unheard of for a 6'1" guy with guns like yours to do at least the same (especially with your activity level).

Yes I totally agree I will not eat sugar free or keto. I will eat healthy and Whole Foods. I will focus on portion size for the rest of my life. I don’t even do sugar free now. I just can’t handle the artificial sweeteners or the sugar alcohols. I would rather just not have it. If I want something sweet I will eat a piece of organic high quality dark chocolate. Keto is just not realistic for lifetime and I love that my surgeon also doesn’t push us to go keto. He just makes it simple and straight forward like dr v. He says eat healthy if not then gain ur weight again. It’s simple. We have the tool we can either use or abuse it. A lot of the diet plans and eating plans r made by the nutritionist. My surgeon told me he has a small day in it. But he is just too busy with surgery and after care that he can’t focus on it.

Today is day 8 post op and the first day I felt like a human. I had to call the doctor yesterday morning for anti nausea medication. I wasn't throwing up, just couldn't stomach the thought of anything. It worked well and now that I can get some calories and carbs in, I feel so much better with more energy. I think it was sugar free syrup with the sugar alcohols that set me up for a really bad weekend. Staying away from that ! I'm still not on soft foods but enjoying a variety of soups and baby food. I know many plans have people avoiding carbs and sugar but I'm not one of those and man, do they make you feel better lol Sent from my Pixel 3 using Tapatalk