Search the Community

Alright, I think it's time for an update. I caught a cold on the 28th and it's beating me up. I haven't been able to leave the house because everything makes me dry heave / gag. I can't drink anything but water and yoghurt now, can't really handle the fruit juice anymore. I developed oral thrush and was prescribed pills and a gel, I can't really do the gel because as soon as it touches my tongue I start dry heaving violently. I started feeling a little better on the 1st but things took a turn the next day. I felt some pain on the side of my throat and got it checked out, turns out it's tonsillitis. It makes sneezing and coughing a real pain now. On top of that, I developed bronchitis 2 days ago that just keeps getting worse. I can't sleep much anymore. I'm drinking 1.8L to 2.1L of liquids a day but I still wake up every 45mins to an hour because of how dry my mouth gets. Has anyone experienced or heard of someone that experienced a bad cold that led to more complications so soon after a sleeve? Genuinely worried now, been in bed for 5 days. I can walk around the house but I get short of breath pretty fast and start getting nauseous. Sent from my SM-N970U using BariatricPal mobile app

I think we all were at the very least a little scared of possible complications going into surgery. What helped me was learning that statistically you are more likely to die in a car accident than from this surgery. I just thought to myself, the fear of a possible complication of driving (a tragic accident) doesn’t keep me from driving so why would that same fear keep me from having a surgery that I need? That rationalization sort of calmed my fears. I was definitely worried about failure too. I am almost 9 months out and I am 9 pounds from goal and I am sorry to admit I am still afraid. Afraid that I will gain it all back and now everyone knows I had surgery and will think I am even more of a failure. I am not sure how to talk myself out of that one. Only that other people keep it off and I know in my heart that I am trying my best so hopefully it will be okay. I think having done the yo yo dieting for sooooooo many years we will always be at least a little afraid of gaining it back. Also, I had many food funerals. People even refer to their dinner before pre op diet as their last supper. Many of us have a complicated relationship with food and the thought of having it taken away is a scary thing. But I was afraid of that for no reason. I have tried small amounts of everything I ate prior to surgery without any issues so once I get to my goal weight I know that I can have everything in moderation again. Some people do have foods they can’t tolerate post surgery but most people say they also no longer crave them so it’s not like they really miss them anymore. More like they just no longer enjoy those foods.

Welcome, and congratulations on starting this process . We all are a little scared (or very scared) of dying on the table. But death and severe complications are very rare. It's common to gain weight before the two week pre-op diet; it's called "food funerals". Plus, you were dealing with the holidays! I will say that after surgery, it's way too easy to eat "slider" foods like chips and sweets, even when you're too full for protein. Do you think your mobility will be restored after losing weight? If not, you might try to find some sorts of exercises that work with your limitations because exercising is good for keeping the weight off long term. You could work with a physical trainer to get some ideas that are designed for your body. Good Luck!

Hi all! I have to tell you how much I appreciate the information shared on here, food, what to expect, advice… everything. It’s very helpful. I met with my Dr first back in August (2021) completed all the paperwork and pre surgical appointments, and his office called just before Christmas to tell me that pending covid, and completion of a few final requirements, my VSG surgery will be Feb 2, 2022. I started down this path because a routine test found that my liver was excessively enlarged, enough my PCP asked me to consider the idea of WLS, because he was concerned. (He’s been my Dr for 40+ yrs and surgery as a solution is not his normal philosophy … so I paid attention when he suggested it). Consulted with my Endo and he was on board so here we are. I won’t pretend surgery doesn’t scare me … it does. A lot. Fear of dying on the table or from a complication after. Fear of failing and waisting the money. Fear of nausea - I don’t do well with nausea at all. Stories of gas pain have kinda freaked me out a little if I’m completely honest. My highest weight was 382 and on my 5’4” body that was scaring me more than surgery, along with the news my liver was so enlarged. After my car accident (over 5 yrs ago) my mobility has been limited and that made putting 50 pounds on what had up until then been my highest of 330 way to easy. Since June of 2021 I was doing pretty well having lost 54 pounds (down to 328), but then between Thanksgiving and New Years I am back up to 340. Now I’m worried what if I can’t do this? I know I ate things I shouldn’t have - maybe in part because I know or feared I soon won’t be able to do that any more. But I also know that’s no excuse. What I’ve learned from these posts is you need to commit because it’s a lifestyle not a diet. Did you have fears or concerns about your surgery before having it? If so, how did you handle, manage or overcome them? Any advice you can give me at all would be appreciated. Thank you.

I'm curious about revisions. What are the criteria for qualifications for such? Do you still have to be a 40 BMI or just have a complication from original WLS?

I had my RNY on 12/15/21. Got out of hospital right before Christmas. Had complications this past week and just got home New Years Eve from another hospital stay. Feel full. Trying to get fluids down.

Here is Dr. Alvarez's (VSG surgeon in Mexico) take on gastroparesis: I have also seen, from another angle, that extreme cases of gastroparesis is treated surgically with a cousin to the RNY, so yes, it does seem that WLS of either the sleeve or RNY form would not only be compatible but beneficial to your condition. As always, consult with the surgeons on this, and I would also make sure that they are experienced in this type of complication as there might be some different techniques used in these cases, so it's good to deal with someone who has been down this road before. Good luck,

I had this diagnosis pre-surgery, it wasn’t a complication from my duodenal switch (SADI). I do not have trouble breathing really, except when I drink and then bend over or lie down. Then the contents of my stomach often come up and go down into my lungs. When that happens I can hear a crackling noise when I breathe and have trouble taking deep breaths. I avoid this by cutting off drinking about 30 minutes before bedtime and sleeping on an incline. I have read here often that gastric bypass should help with reflux. I’m sorry that you developed it even with the “right” surgery.

I'm study at home, when i not working, and i try to explain to my parents all my difficult, but my father forget the thing i Say to im. I can't eat chicken, beacause i traw up, if I go to shopping for me I bought chicken. I try with a shelf only for me, it work for a little time. And i also try my fitness Pal, it work if I don't become obsessed with the count of calories. I'm complicated, I know, but I work hard for this,and i don't see to much results, and I think I'm loosing my motivation Sent from my M2101K7BNY using BariatricPal mobile app

I am also getting a revision surgery too. I have complications with GERD after getting the sleeve done. Honestly the best option, knowing what I know now is that the duodenal surgery would be the best option for you since you’re doing it out of pocket. It will eliminate the issue of development of the reflux

Samesies! Well not quite the same, I had SADI-S. My surgery was in November 2020 and I had no complications and a quick recovery. I've lost 130 pounds so far. Mexico Bariatric Center was very thorough and professional in my experience. I am happy with my treatment there and very happy with the results. I also believe I could have had the surgery covered by my insurance but with the deductible, co-pays, and lead-up treatment (counseling, nutrition, etc.) I would have probably ended up paying about the same amount. And as Vassarini said, it would have been a 12 to 18 month wait time to actually have surgery. With MBC, I scheduled it 7 weeks out (for convenience, probably could have made it quicker if I wanted to). I did bring a companion, even though he had to stay at the hotel, and I liked having him close by while in the hospital and with me for the two nights in the hotel. In retrospect I don't think I would have liked having him staying in the hospital room with me overnight but visits would have been nice in a non-covid environment. Also useful for carrying bags in the airport. Didn't need a wheelchair. Piece of advice: If you can afford it, get a first-class seat for the return flight. I don't really have a PCP (I know, I know. . . ) so I haven't run into any problems with follow-up care.

I will be happy to tell you my experience since it is very recent history. However, everyone's doctor and experience is a little bit different. I elected for the gastric sleeve. It was a personal choice. Prior to surgery, my doctor requested that I begin a special diet to reduce the size of my liver. From what I have read on this forum, these diets very greatly, from surgeon to surgeon, in the types of foods you can eat and the length of time you must diet prior to surgery. However, I believe that, in all cases, one is required to consume more protein than carbohydrates or fats. Apparently, your liver, while overweight, is large and fatty. The diet reduces the size of your liver. This reduction allows the surgeon more room to operate. (I have no idea if this is true...just forwarding you what my surgeon told to me.) On the day of the surgery, I arrived at the facility at the appointed time. I was prepped for surgery with an IV. I chatted with the various staff who needed information and chatted with the surgeon prior to the procedure. According to my doctor, the surgery would take a little less than one hour. At the appointed time, I was taken to the operating room. My last memory was meeting the staff in the operating room. I was put under anesthesia shortly thereafter. For me, anesthesia is like time travel. My last memory was in the operating room but I woke up in a recovery room a short time later. I know that time had passed but it feels instantaneous...perhaps like time travel would feel. At this point, there are numerous posts on this forum from people who will recount their experience with recovery. I can only share with you my personal account. I awoke in a recovery room with a little discomfort. It wasn't pain per se, just a feeling of being bloated. I was not nauseated nor was I in any real pain. Again, I only felt bloated discomfort. Apparently, the surgeon inflates your abdomen with CO2 gas in order to have room to perform the surgery. Not all of this gas escapes prior to the end of surgery. This gas was the cause of my discomfort. My assigned post-op nurse encouraged me to get up and walk as much as I could to help relieve the gas pressure. I spent a good amount of time pacing about the floor trying to relieve the pressure. The process works but not as fast as you would like. The remainder of the time, I spent eating some ice chips and taking fluids intravenously. After a few hours, since I had no complications, I was released to my nearby hotel room. This was an outpatient procedure for me. However, an overnight stay at a hotel was required. I was instructed by the surgeon to immediately contact their surgical center if I experienced any issues such as pain, discomfort, etc. Otherwise, if I felt good in the morning, I could go straight home. I awoke in the morning and went home. I had no real issues. My surgery was on a Wednesday. My follow up appointment was exactly one week later, the following Wednesday. I was instructed by the surgical staff that during that week, I could only consume clear liquids. The only things on the menu were clear broths like chicken or beef, no sugar sport drinks, water, protein water and diluted, no sugar cranberry juice. Again, every doctor is different. There are many posts on this forum which provide different details about the immediate post op diet. You can find both positive and negative experiences. In my case, the one week follow up appointment allowed my doctor to assess my situation and determine if I could move on to the next phase of food consumption. At my follow up appointment a week later, I had experienced no pain or adverse effects from the surgery. I was permitted to move on to the next phase of food consumption. I could move on to pureed foods. This phase is to last for a period of three weeks. I am currently in the pureed food phase of my recovery. I was given a list of acceptable foods that I can eat. I was also given nutrition goals to achieve. That is, I am expected to consume a certain number of grams of protein, carbohydrates and fats each day. The acceptable foods on my list would be considered "soft" foods. These types of foods are on the list but this is not the entire list: Scrambled and hard boiled eggs Pudding Yogurt Cottage Cheese Certain canned vegetables Certain creamed soups Protein shakes There are acceptable meats on the menu as well. Items such as chicken, turkey and different types of fish. However, this is the "puree" portion of recovery. I am to puree these foods prior to consumption. That is, I put most of these items, like meat and vegetables, in a food processor to puree them before I eat them. I believe the idea is allow your stomach some time to heal. So there you have it. This is my experience to date. I have followed the doctor's program in its entirety. I have not experienced any problems or issues. I am about two weeks from my next follow up appointment. I expect that I will be able to go back to eating solid foods again at that time. I will leave you with something that I read on this forum. Someone's doctor told them that gastric surgery will give a person about one year to lose weight. During that one year, one must learn how to eat properly to maintain a lifelong weight loss. My plan is to change my past eating habits to more permanent, healthy choices in the future. I have about 11 months remaining to learn. Best of luck to you.

Interesting dilemma. A few perspectives. Would you tell if you had planned knee surgery? Or would you make up a story about getting run over as the day came? In a lot of ways, and forgive me for being frank, I think your own approach to WLS has been influenced by the idea that suffering from obesity is a moral failure, not a medical issue that can, in fact, be managed. If you read any of the latest scientific studies on the subject - and avoid people who make money from you suffering perpetually from obesity like weight loss programs, fitness coaches on Instagram, diet products etc - you'll find that some of us simply never had a chance. Rat populations who get put on too few calories start seeing obesity in the rats lowest in the social order. Isn't that food for thought? Studies where you put subjects under complete caloric input/output control (literally measuring exhaust 24/7 to monitor expenditure) and feed them 1000 calories too much a day see vastly different weight gain rates. Huh? Didn't we just learn calories in - calories out? Often, and even worse, the societal idea of obesity = moral failure leads to eating disorders, which compound the problem. --> You need life-saving medical intervention. You're not 'taking the easy road'. Does this influence your thinking on who and when to tell? For me, it made it much easier to share. And my attitude towards it has been this story, more or less, for my close-to-kinda-close people: "Hey, nobody loses 100+ lbs by going to a dietitian. And I have a life to live, so I got my head in order first, did the work of getting rid of using food as a stress relief mechanism, and then I was ready to take the road with the best chances of success: minor bariatric surgery, a planned diet, and moderate but frequent exercise. It's been great, really great. I'm now finding my balance point, I think most people gain a bit, so I'm expecting that and frankly, I could stand to gain a few" Surprisingly, people love this story and it definitely adds social points. Even among people not known for their empathy. Notice how this story is peppered with all the things that don't involve surgery. I want their story to be much more than surgery. Do you share intimate medical details with everyone? Or do you feel that's nobody else's business? The other - or rather, third - side of this is that it's your body and only you are entitled to learn about it. Medical information (yes, also in 2021 and 2022, freaks) is private. You don't owe anyone any explanation on what goes on inside you. I have a few co-workers who know, and who have kept it to themselves, but I don't think it's "office news". It's my body and my life and despite the time I took off (six weeks!), it doesn't concern them. Period. Remember that. As much as you shouldn't be ashamed of having WLS, you shouldn't feel the opposite of shame is self-exposure. Reality time: you'll end up telling her. And it won't be a big deal. Here's a good outcome, and there's a million variations on this, but I think you'll want to tell someone you share an apartment with. At the end of the day, we need people on our journey. Some of them will let us down, but we'll need to keep reaching out and accept the fact that sometimes, we get burned. That's the price for social connections. I think you'll tell her some time before, and that you'll tell her in a confident manner that actually, you've decided to think about your health and in a new way. Instead of beating yourself over the head about your weight, you realized this only helps sell more WeightWatchers classes. And here you are, back at square 1. So you've started the road to WLS, you've done your homework, you know outcomes aren't guaranteed, but you want a shot at something that will give you a better life. And dear Emily, we're close, we live together, and I want you to be a confidant on this new chapter because I like you. I trust you'll know that this is my information to share or not share; it should obviously go without saying with any private medical decisions, but I'm just saying it to avoid any confusion. I'm really excited for this, and well, you're probably going to see kitchen scales, mini-meals in the fridge, and a lot more weird protein products in the cupboards. Feel free to try them! I don't think it'll be a big deal. I think how you approach it will set the tone for it. Make sure you take the stress OFF yourself in that close-in living situation by managing expectations subtly like "hey, most people lose 50-60-maybe 70% of their excess weight, I'm not doing this to get a BMI of 25, just so that's clear. If I wanted a guarantee for that, I'd have to go with much more drastic surgery types and for now, I'm going with the first line of procedure recommended for people in my situation to avoid unnecessary complications". This removes the pressure and hey, anything above 60% will be a shared celebration. I told my close people I wanted to get to 220, but that the surgery on average would get me to 230ish. So getting to 220 was a huge milestone and well, I'm at 197 now. People react how you set them up to react is what I'm saying. Alright, sorry this got long. I hope some of it is helpful.

Hi I decided on a gastric sleeve rather than a bypass. As its less evasive and the operation is quicker and less complications. Nearly all surgeons recommended the sleeve now over the bypass

Definitely spend your time reading up on surgeries. Are you worried about regain? Complications? Food intolerance? I have to admit: had my doctor not suggested the surgery I ended up having, I might never have gotten the one I eventually was very happy to get. Are you a big meal-eater, a snacker, etc. This matters, too.

Hi everyone! A bit late to the party but I had the sleeve done on the 9th of December. It has been a challenge to say the least… I had complications and lost about 2 litres of blood. Much longer hospital stay than was planned but getting on my feet now. great to be here with you all 🙂

Emotions are complicated. (Duh! Tek) When I was a 1/4 ton too heavy I constantly felt judged. Heck, I was judging me why shouldn't everyone? When kids and adults alike run into poles and walls because they were staring at me it's hard to pretend I'm not being judged, though sometimes it gave me a chuckle. I knew my friends and work acquaintances rarely said anything because, generally, they were kind people. I like kind people. Family was harder. Love seems to allow the harshest of cruelties. After I started losing the weight they also became my biggest cheerleaders, even though they mucked it up sometimes as you describe. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. For me this is where the charity principle comes into play: Accept the good intentions even though the expression of them were poorly formed. I want to say the feeling of being judged got better after losing weight, but for me, not so much. No one I know now knew me then. I know intellectually no one is judging me for my weight. But still my head image of me doesn't match the real me though with time it's getting closer, so I still have the emotions of big. I always feel judged about other things too so I think a lot of it may be the joy of being me. Good luck, Tek

I'm a little over 1 year post-op. Sleeved 12/4/20 in Tijuana, amazing experience, no complications and good follow up care with a good state side PCP who approved of and supported going to Mexico. I started at 345 lbs and currently weigh 225 lbs at 5'7 so 120 lbs lost in a year. Emotionally, I'm sad, frustrated and need some support. I have zero appetite (absolutely none) and take a med who's off label usage is for binge eating disorder which further surpresses anything hunger related. This med is for executive dysfunction issues (ADHD) so going off is not an option. I have no cravings. I'm very much struggling to eat, but I have serious food intolerances. I cannot tolerate most meat such as chicken, beef or pork. It makes my stomach cramp horribly. If I do force myself to eat it, I can maybe get a few ounces in but I'm miserable for a while after. Shrimp is the only animal protein that I can tolerate consistently with little issues. Even fish can be problematic only due to palate and taste bud changes. I can no longer tolerate eggs by themselves. I vomit within 10 minutes and vomiting triggers food avoidance for days. This has been mitigated by a therapist and not eating eggs. Eggs used as a binder in things like bread, cake or muffins are fine. Rice, pasta, bread and vegetables give me no problems. Dairy is ok as long as it's Fairlife milk and protein shakes or aged cheese. Any other cow based dairy items trigger diarrhea at the worst, stomach cramping/bloating at the least. Non-dairy such as oat milk and nut milks are no issues. Most protein shakes/powders make me vomit like eggs do. I have spent hundreds of dollars on protein shakes and am grateful that my husband can drink anything or it'd all go to waste. Surprisingly, I can tolerate deli meat, but very tiny portions like in a lunchable. Same goes for sandwiches so I've been consistent with those. Snacks are non-existent except for sunflower seeds. Sometimes even Doritos bother me. The only slider food I had for a while was ice cream, but it triggered lactose issues I've never had before so... Drinking is not an issue though I do have issues with certain waters, but juice? Tea? Coffee? No problems! Anything liquid doesn't bother my stomach. Even drippings from the chicken I'll put on rice! I'm also experiencing gastro issues... Specifically the trigger to release your bowels when you eat. It's an involuntarily action your body does, but mine is violent. For months I had nothing my diarrhea after eating. I did a stool test and it was only slight inflammation. It's slowed down some but I just stick near a toilet when I eat. It doesn't matter really what I eat either. I also have GERD (did not have it prior, one of the lucky few that develop it post surgery) and am on prescription meds because OTC does not work. GERD is not every day. I'll have a flare up (connected to nothing!) Maybe 1x per month for a few days and then nothing. The above intolerances and gastro issue trigger food avoidance how vomiting does. I'm literally disgusted 99% of the time I'm in the kitchen when looking to feed myself because of the physical issues I'm having with food. I have no problems cooking for and feeding others (I have a family) and being in the kitchen and cooking is still an absolute joy. I have no negative physical or mental reactions to food that I do not plan to eat. Strangely, I'm VERY excited to still try new foods and will go with friends or family who have as diverse palates as I do and will taste their item. But it's literally a taste. I know I'm not eating enough, weightloss has definitely stalled due to the lower calories. I'm taking my vitamins like clock work and while I'm due for more blood work, my last was great. Feeding myself feels like a huge chore. VSG has done it's job - it's changed me metabolically. No more appetite, no more cravings and has completely rewired my brain to not enjoy food at all. I'm only a year PO so... Could this change? How do I combat this? Should I stop whining? Does it get better? Should I go back to therapy? Would a revision help? I feel like most people want to only look at food as a necessity. I wish I was disinterested in food like I am now, but without the physical side effects that make me sick or keep me on a toilet. I appreciate you reading this far!

I would not go through with the surgery with this doctor. If she is not available now, it is unlikely she will be available after surgery if you have questions or complications. As @Lifestyle Changer said, find out if your insurance covers other doctors, and call them to find out if you have to start the whole process again. Most likely, you need to take your charts over. In my case, I met with my Dr 3 times before surgery (including the 1-week pre-op appt). And then one week post-op, and every month since then, for the first 12 mo. My Dr. also gave me his cell to text him if I have any issues. Different Drs will have different availability, schedules, plans. But you have to feel confident and have trust in your surgical team.

To be fair and to clear what seems to be a ton of misconceptions in America about the Mini Gastric Bypass / One Anastomosis Bypass / Omega Loop Bypass, there's nothing 'almost as good as' about the MGB compared to RNY. More weight loss, better resolution of comorbidities, and fewer complications. Higher risk of malnutrition long-run (like duodenal switch patients) and a risk of reflux, though much lower than sleeve.

I'm so sorry for both of you! While complication rates are low for this surgery, they aren't zero, so unfortunately some folks go through these situations. I think it's definitely helpful to share so that others have a realistic view of the risks instead of assuming sunshine and rainbows. Hopefully this is the worst of it and it'll end up being a small blip in your life history. Hang in there!

HI all!!! So I had my bypass on 11/17/21 a few days after I started getting really nauseous and couldn't eat of drink. The Friday after Thanksgiving I begin throwing up massive amounts of blood and clots. My surgeon rushed me to ER. They did a CT scan and everything looked good. They admitted me and started fluids. over the next week I had an endoscopy and a text on my gallbladder. The endoscopy showed no new blood but my stomach lining was VERY irritated. The gallbladder test showed it was not draining properly. He decided he was going to remove it. At the same time he was getting concerned because my numbers were out of whack and my protein levels were dropping. They put a central line in and began feeding me TPN through it. Gallbladder surgery went well and he was very happy he removed it because it was very distended. I was discharged a week ago with TPN. So now I am home with my central line and TPN every night. I still can't really eat anything and even drinking causes me pain and nausea. Anyone experience ANY of this???

Happy to see this thread! Since having surgery in June, my 2nd child moved out leaving just my "baby" (he's 16) home with my husband and myself. Like any 16 year old, he is often gone leaving just my husband and me home for dinner. I'm quickly finding that my desire to cook complicated meals is fading fast, which, has been really surprising! I really find that I have less interest in food, mostly because I know I'm going to eat less than a half cup of it and it's just not that big of a deal what I eat now...it's just food/fuel. This feeling has been both empowering and challenging to get used to. On nights where I'm not cooking and there are no leftovers I tend to opt for: Oscar Mayer snack plates (meat, cheese and a few triscuits), pre-cooked chicken skewers I found at Costco with a veg, pre-cooked chicken or salmon patty tossed with some canned green beans, frozen meals (typically Healthy Choice or Real Good which lasts for two meals), greek salad with tuna (cucumber, onion, tomatoes, red bell pepper topped with some light dressing and fat free feta cheese), pre-cooked chicken breast bites (from costco) and a quarter of an apple or just a couple slices of good deli meat with some cheese and grapes. These are options I use for meals most days of the week. Between these and my eggs for breakfast I have no issues eating 80-90g of protein a day (which is on the high side for my program) without having to resort to a shake. Unfortunately, I am not one of the folks that can do a shake daily. I find I can do non-dairy shakes occasionally, but, more than that and my stomach starts to stage a revolt! Be persistent, try different things and hold on to the things that will work for YOU!

Well said, @Jaelzion. I used to be able to diet & lose weight when I was younger but the reason I regained weight after was because I went back to eating the same foods I did before. I decided to have surgery was because I was unable to lose the 30kgs I’d put on in my late 40s early 50s; damn menopause meant I couldn’t shift more than a couple of kgs even if eating 500 calories for weeks & weeks. If you go back to eating the same foods in similar quantities you will gain weight again after your surgery. Portion control is important but must be coordinated with calorie control. 1500 calories of high fat, high sugar, carb rich food is the same as 1500 calories of protein dense, low fat, low carb, low sugar food. It’s just that one is better for your body & doesn’t lead to major health complications (heart disease, high cholesterol, diabetes, etc.). If you choose to eat pizza every day that’s your choice as long as the calories you consume over the whole day are not more than what your body needs to function & will therefore eatable you to maintain your weight. I eat more often than I did before (pre surgery: 2 meals & 1 snack - post surgery: 3 meals & 3 or 4 snacks). I eat more food across a day than I did before too. And I eat more calories than I did before to maintain at this weight then I did before to be unable to maintain at a much higher weight. The difference is the nutritional quality of the food I eat & that the surgery kick started my metabolism again. And I still have times I’m not hungry or interested in eating.

the mortality rate on RNY is 0.3%. It's even lower for sleeve (can't remember the percentage for that one since I was an RNY patient, so that's the one that mattered to me). So you have at least a 99.7% chance of not dying. That's an excellent stat as far as surgeries go. Better than the stats for hip replacement surgery, and they do those all the time. people have died from things like tonsillectomies and wisdom tooth extractions. But how often does that happen? Almost never. Same with this one. your mom may be remembering weight loss surgeries 30-40-50 years ago, when they WERE dangerous and some people died from them. That just isn't true anymore. Today's surgeries are very safe. You'll be fine. Edited to add that I agree 100% with the above poster. You're more likely to die from an obesity-related complication than you are from the surgery.