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Unsupportive Husband
summerseeker replied to Amhuston82's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I have been a member of this forum for about 18 months and you are now the fourth woman that I have come across on here having this problem with family. If you want this surgery then you will have a fight on your hands. Its going to get dirty. For their own reasons they don't want you to change. Personally I agree with you, you will continually gain and loose the same weight over and over again, I did. Its heart breaking. The people on this forum will help in any way they can. If you can get to do this, you wont regret it. -
Had surgery 6/28/22 245 day of surgery today 215 . Super happy of the weight I been loosing the hardest part for me to get over was the cravings . I’m doing much better now . Premier protein in the morning one egg white bite from Costco 3 hours after protein I’ll have Greek non fat yogurt . After that 1-2 popsicles then evening I’ll have another protein .
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Advice Needed: BPD/DS or SADI?
NovaLuna replied to jenniferann's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I chose the Loop DS (virgin surgery not revision) for myself because of what the surgeons themselves were saying about common issues with the original DS (diarrhea). That was the only reason I choose the Loop DS lol. I met my goal weight (even if I'm currently up 6 pounds due to meds I'm taking, but I WAS up 18 pounds and dropped 12 so... I guess I can deal with 6 pounds. I'll lose it eventually. Or try to.). If I had to do it all over again... I would probably do the traditional DS. Simply because you lose a tad bit more weight with the traditional (according to my surgeon. It's supposedly only a tiny bit, but still) and I wonder if I'd picked it if I would have been able to get closer to a 'normal' BMI. I'm still technically 'overweight' but I figure if I ever do skin removal I'll probably lose a good 10-20 pounds of loose skin and even if I'd STILL be 'overweight' at least I'd be in spitting distance of a 'normal' BMI (I have no idea why I'm putting it in quotations...😓 I can't stop myself 😅). Anyway, you go with your gut instincts. The surgery is for you and you're the one who has to live with it so trust in whatever you decide to do. -
You still have to diet and excercise with WLS. The surgery is there to keep you on track. I call mine my co-pilot, or the adult voice that says "no, you absolutely don't need that" and it works. People who sprout the "easy way out" nonsense simply don't understand what WLS is or does. It is still hard. Every bit as hard as a "normal diet", because it IS a "normal diet", in fact an even stricter one. You can try to explain it to him. Ultimately though, you'll have to be your own support here. Once the weight starts coming off and you emerge from obesity a happier and more repaired person, they will all see that it was in fact the right thing for you.
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Unsupportive Husband
Arabesque replied to Amhuston82's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
This is far from an easy way out. I’ve never worked as hard with a diet as I did after my surgery. I changed what I eat & how I eat & did a lot of mental work to discover why I ate. I also did a lot of research into nutrition & discovered what worked for me & my body. We’ve all dieted & exercised in the past & successfully lost weight & like you we all put it back on too which is why we turned to surgery. We’re ridden that merry go round many times. For every person you find who says I followed this diet & lost weight & maintained you’ll find 1000s who tried it & failed. The diet industry is a multi billion dollar industry for a reason & there’s a reason the number of weight loss surgery procedures is increasing. By the way, exercising only contributes to 10-20% of the weight you have to lose (read somewhere recently that it’s really only 5-10% 🤷🏻♀️). We don’t say surgery is a tool for nothing. Just like buying a treadmill or a gym membership (for which you’d be congratulated), if you don’t use the treadmill or go to the gym nothing has changed & you won’t achieve anything. Same with the surgery, if you don’t use it you wont succeed. Many of the surgery benefits don’t last forever (like the lack of hunger, the restriction, etc.) which is why you have to take advantage of the time they do & establish new & better habits. Something we never did with other diets. You are making the decision to have surgery for excellent reasons: your health & your family. And you have years of weight loss/gain experience on which to base your decision. Sadly though, you may never convince your husband. Thinner people will never truely understand the challenges & anguish faced by those with weight issues. At least you’ll find plenty of support here. I wish you all the best. PS - Don’t be surprised if your husband & his family start sharing ‘horror surgery’ stories. It seems to be what happens next in plans to turn you off surgery. When they start with the friend of a friend of a friend, ask to speak to the one who had the surgery (they likely won’t exist or the story has been twisted) or share stories from here. -
It’s likely not a stall because you’ve been plateaued for so long. Stalls usually last 1-3 weeks You may have reached your body’s set point. The weight at which your body is happiest &/or your consuming the calories your body needs to function at this weight. I ate 1300 calories & maintained at 49kg for a good year. I eat 1400 calories now (because of additional protein) & maintain at 51kg. Like @catwoman7 said you could lose more if you reduced your calories (& upped your activity) but is a lower intake sustainable? Only you know that. And remember not everyone reaches a healthy BMI. (BMI should be used as a guide not a rule anyway.) it’s got to be a weight that healthy for you & your life. But, have a chat with your dietician & see what advice they can offer.
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Hey There! Any December 2021 Surgery Friends?
New_me_2022 replied to armartin98's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Hi December surgery friends!! Just wanted to check on everyone and see how things have been going... As for me, I was sleeved on December 22 and have lost a total of 130 lbs. I am down to 185lbs and am working hard on meeting the "estimated goal" of 180 the doctor mentioned at my original consultation. The weight loss has slowed significantly (down to 1-2 lbs a week) but I've been able to incorporate exercising a few times a week when my schedule permits. Similar to @huskymama above, I got a running itch last week and decided to go on a 3 mile jog. Surprising to me, even after not running for years, I was able to do it. As for eating, I'm still not consuming bread, rice, pastas, or potatoes but have had the occasional potato chip here and there. Also, I'm happy to report I still have my love of pickles and popcorn so no taste bud changes there. I'm keeping my portions at 3-4 oz depending on the food type but have definitely learned to listen to my stomach when i'm full and walk away from the table. I truly hope everyone is doing well and making positive progress, regardless of what a scale says. -
I think if one has had the lapband already, better to go bypass since the potential gerd and esophagus irritation problems that the lapband itself can cause. Less future problems. Now if you never had the lapband, then I think a "virgin" sleeve's weight loss is really good, and probably less likely to cause future gerd problems compared to those who had the band first. Just my thinking, I could be wrong. I just know going from lapband to sleeve, it was a struggle as far as restriction. I did lose weight but it was hard and I never got below 160 lb with vsg because to me, the lapband had far more restriction than the sleeve. With the RNY, it is a totally different ballgame and no gerd.
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I just had my gall bladder removed at 3 months post sleeve. I lost 4lbs the week after surgery but I've been in a stall for 2 weeks now with my weight going up a bit. I have not stalled at all prior to this. The fatigue post-op was the worst but I think it's because I had 2 surgeries back to back. I am glad to have it out. The gall bladder pain was excruciating! Plus the nausea and bloating!
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Unsupportive Husband
Nikki35Cunn replied to Amhuston82's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I fully can relate to your story. I'm currently 7months post op. An now I have my husband an family on board. Nobody understood why I wanted the vsg surgery. An everyone thought I can get the weight off myself etc. So I mentally prepared myself to go on this journey along. The only support I had was my 3 children. So fast forward 7 months later he can't keeps his hands off me !! [emoji6] An my family can't believe the transformation. An believe it or not I was able to encourage my sister to get vsg ..who is currently 4wks post op. So I say this to say follow your heart desires an have no fear or worries about support. Because the truth of the matter is you will have friendships, and relationships that will end once you bark on this journey. Im a witness I lost a lot of ppl who I had long term friendships with. But it was for the better. So just prepare yourself.. I actually went to therapy before I had surgery and it prepared me for anything that may would have happened after surgery. Best of luck to you on your journey please come join the banana sleeve gang!!! [emoji529][emoji529] Sent from my WTCELERO5G using BariatricPal mobile app -
Hello! I am going to be having a laproscopic gastric bypass later this fall and my husband is 100% unsupportive. He says I am stupid if I have the surgery and that I am taking the lazy way out. He believes the exact same results can be reached with diet and exercise alone. I am turning 40 this year and am 5'4 and weigh 330lbs. I have dieted, worked out alone, with groups and with personal trainers until I am blue in the face and will lose 30 to 40 pounds then gain it all back. I am very stout in my build. I have 7 inches of spinal column that fused to my tailbone in development so my overall body is meant to be 5'10-5'11. I will never be skinny. I want to be healthy. Him not being supportive will not stop me from going forward but how do I make him understand this is the right move for me? I will also note that no one in his family is supportive as they are all very close-minded and have the same negative attitude he does. He is not overweight. He is a farmer, is very active and his metabolism is great. We have two young daughters and they are my why. I want my next 40 years to be my healthiest.
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November Surgery Buddies!!!
ForMyOhana replied to Tristenhilpert97's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
8 months in. More days that I feel good than bad. Weight loss slowed, probably due to summer vacations and not watching what I'm doing as well. Some days I feel like I "don't hit my limit "... in other words, I feel like I ate a lot today and the last few days. That scares me a little. I feel like I need a good reset. That said, I'm down about 125. My clothes are still feeling looser... to clarify, my new replacement pants are getting too loose. My ring is almost falling off. My arrhythmia... the reason for the surgery is nearly completely gone. So, good stuff. My bellybutton gets irritated and seems to weep... gross... I'm not sure why. Will be talking to the nurse tomorrow. Need to just refocus and reset though. I'd like to lose another 10 in the next month which will require me to get back on track... I'm in a wedding. I have 2 more vacations coming up, so I gotta be good. I should be able to get more activity in which will be a plus. Walking and hiking. Good luck everyone! -
Considering lapband nervious but need help loseing weight and keep off
I♡BypassedMyPhatAss♡ replied to Bulletproof's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
I can speak to this from personal experience. Please reconsider getting a Lap Band. I had one and it didn't turn out well. There's way better weight loss options available than Lap Band. -
It's taken me a little longer than the first time to lose the weight post-revision, but I'm a few years older and also I started out a little lower. It's been about 8 months after my surgery and I'm at about the weight I was about 7 months after the sleeve. I'm approaching the lowest I ever was post-sleeve and hoping to break through and go lower now.
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Losing more weight NOT exercising???
KarenHoule replied to SleeveToBypass2023's topic in Fitness & Exercise
Hello, I am new aboard; I feel the same stress and fear of not gaining weight. Tell me, pls, your therapist. -
November Surgery Buddies!!!
Lilypop replied to Tristenhilpert97's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Been 3 years out from my 2019 surgery, I lost originally 109 pounds weighed about 147 pounds and that was after my skin removal surgery. Then I peaked up back to 169 now currently and I am very comfortable at this weight. I don’t look like I’m dying since I was soo skinny looking because I’m super tall about 5”11. I do occasionally eat pizza and some rice here and there but I’m back to normal eating. I don’t have big plates but I don’t much often and if I do I weigh the snacks and use the calories to the T. It’s true what they say that you gain about 20 pounds or so after a few years but again I’m healthy and have managed my weight consistently around 169ish for the past two years now so I suggest people don’t beat yourself up because of it. Doesn’t help I’m over the whole 30 years old and your body starts to slow… that’s very very true. But even with it I’m okay. It was not always rainbows though… I do have days where I will experience dumping, and my nutritionist said that gaining the 20 pounds was better for me because after surgery for a whole year I had been in and out of the hospital for low blood pressure, fainting and my heart rate would drop below 50 bpm so since then I have yet (thank god) to be back in the hospital. So I would say it’s really a mind set for how you take this tool your given and use it to fit your life not anyone else’s. mentality it is a challenge because I wish the surgeries didn’t leave huge scars which I would show if anyone wanted to see how the fleur de lis surgery looks like. But in all I look at it as I can fit my clothes, look good in them and I feel amazing most days 😁 I hope I wasn’t too all over the board with my experience lol -
November Surgery Buddies!!!
Spinoza replied to Tristenhilpert97's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Hi guys - we've done 8 months now, how are you all doing? I like this thread because I can look back and see my journey - never did a thread all to myself. All good here - I'm 8 months and a week post op, current weight 173 and total loss 103lbs. BMI 25.5. In the last month I have averaged a loss of 1.25lbs a week, which I'm thrilled with. Ideally I would love to lose another stone but that's in the lap of the gods. Either way I'm extremely happy to have had this procedure. Eating a bit more (volume-wise) in the last few weeks as my hunger has properly returned now - it never really left, but I had a few weeks of what I called full-hunger, when I had eaten what would have filled me up before but it just didn't any more, even if I waited 40 minutes or so, so I've been upping the portion sizes - just a little - and I'm feeling properly full again. I suspect this is going to be a pattern until I reach my new weight. I'm eating more or less all foods now - still protein first veg second most of the time but I have had occasional bread, no pasta no rice but a small slice or two of pizza etc. and it's all sitting well with me. Trying to average 1200 calories a day still but at weekends I go over that and I'm not beating myself up about it. Would love to hear from you all - or at least the people who are still visiting this board 8 months on. Hope you're having the time of your lives - I certainly am. -
Hello! New here - just starting journey
AmandaD. replied to AmandaD.'s topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
Thank you all for your suggestions! I actually found out my employers insurance (which I don’t currently have now) covers Bariatric surgery! So my plan is to enroll in Nov & start my journey in January! Anything I can do prior to get me ready? For the weight loss program is that something you wait for and your dietician gives you or can you pick one and do that ahead of time? Appreciate it! -
Considering lapband nervious but need help loseing weight and keep off
Bulletproof posted a topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
Im disabled so its difficult to exercice well if i can lose and keep weight off it would make life so much esier im just nervious dont know what to expect -
I have been in the same weight of 175 for 2 weeks, this is the first time since surgery, maybe not long enough to complain but the issue is that I traveled last week and I put 12K to 15K steps per day in the last 9 days. I was expecting to came home and see at least one # down, instead this morning I am 176. My restriction still works I can't eat too much at a time, but now I can feel real hunger, and it is hard to control how many times I eat during the day, I am worried because I am still far from my goal.
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New Member/Revisions
jenuinelygenuinely replied to CDMC1972's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
This sounds like what I went through!!! I hear a lot of people say the revision makes you stall on weight loss! Is it true? Did you have to work harder after your revision?? -
I wanted to update everyone on my mock trial of the liquid pre-op diet. I had been doing full liquids for a couple of weeks and eating solids on the weekends. I discovered a couple of things. 1) Adding protein to everything you put in your mouth helps with hunger. Water, soups, shakes, smoothies, etc. 2) After not eating solids and then eating solids, I would feel uncomfortable in my stomach, especially if I ate a large portion. I do believe the tummy shrinks a bit. 3) Once I started the clear-fluids-only diet, more weight started coming off faster. I started the clear-only yesterday, and last night was the very first time I was hungry before bed. I actually had to get up at 10 pm to drink another protein shake because I could not get to sleep. 4) Liquid protein is my friend Overall I'm so very glad I did this mock trial because I tried a bunch of different recipes and combinations of things and learned what I liked and what I didn't. Taking the time to do this has calmed my mind so I don't have to worry about going into these next few weeks before surgery. I'm down 10 pounds already in July, and I hit my goal weight I wanted prior to surgery. Now I actually have more time to get lower. So now, I'm going to set it for 10 more pounds before surgery since I'm going into the clear-liquids-only stage.
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Not everyone gets to a “normal” BMI. According to my team it’s not uncommom to settle into a new weight that is slightly obese according to BMI.
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I am 11 months post op and I seem to have stopped losing. I am still exercising and counting calories but nothing seems to move the weight lately. I lost about 113 pounds which is great but was hoping for just a bit more to get below a bmi of 25
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revisions always seem to be slower than virgin surgeries. That said, you can always lose more weight by cutting calories....I mean if you're willing to do that (I know I could lose more by cutting them, but evidently I'm not willing to do that because here I sit....still 10-ish lbs heavier than what I want to be...)
