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So sorry for your loss and for the others who are feeling the same pain. May you find peace and healing for your broken heart.

I am so sorry for your loss, I have not lost a son but I have lost a loved one and I know how you feel. Be strong, I'll pray for you.

Im in month 4, yep, it’s def more hair loss than normal, but it’s not like I have bald patches or anything. I have long hair and if it gets super bad I’d cut it but for now it’s just kind of annoying every time I run my hands through my hair to have multiple strands there. Like other posters said, it comes back, and generally not noticeable to anyone but you.

Newyorklady our stats are so close! The only difference is I started heavier than you, but on day of surgery I was almost your exact weight and we are the same height. I had a few thoughts of darn, I lost around 60 lbs without it, why do I need this at all? But the reality is that I don’t need help with the initial weight loss, I need help with getting to goal, and staying there. Weight loss gets harder the more you lose, as we all know. I’m currently 228 a few months after surgery (I’m a slow loser, most likely because of losing so much weight prior to surgery) and the difference between even 280 and here in terms of how I feel, how I look, and lifestyle is huge. For the first time in forever I actually can see that I’m able to lose weight and not be consumed by hunger and feelings of deprivation while I do it. I am glad I did surgery when I did, because I’m at the right time in my life. But there is a piece of me that knows 6 years ago I was maintaining in the 280s, and if I’d started the process there instead of waiting to yoyo all the way up to 340 I would have saved myself years of grief and misery. I’ve heard it here before with “I can do it on my own!” If I could have, I would have.

this isn't specific to massive weight loss patients, but I know sometimes when people's breasts are so large and heavy that they pull on their shoulders and/or backs, or are causing some other medical issue, insurance will cover it. I didn't have issues like that so I had to self pay, but I'm really glad I had the surgery.

There are a few controversial topics that get some strong (and not-so-strong) opinions/responses on this forum. Alcohol consumption is one of them. With that said, I am a maintainer and a regular drinker. Aside: I have mixed feelings about saying this even as I type this, as I don't want to inadvertently influence someone to drink if they are of the type who may spiral. I often drop hints about my drinking habits in more light-hearted threads (i.e., the food thread or the clothes thread), but in threads specifically asking about alcohol by those in the early stages, I have pause. But, we are all adults here and can make our own choices, so here goes: Prior to WLS, I didn't drink regularly, but if/when I did, I drank ALOT. Think sloppy drunk. It was always at parties or nights out, and never at home (if we hosted parties, I'd drink, but not get drunk cuz I mean, I had hosting responsibilities after all, LOL). During weight loss phase, I must have drank maybe 5-6 times the entire time. And it was very little, less than 1/4 of a single serving, if that. The first time I drank after surgery was 3 weeks post op. I had 2 sips of red wine at a party, and it was weird...I remember feeling the liquid in my stomach and the warmth of it travel through my intestines and I got surprisingly tipsy for so little that I drank. The second time I had a drink was 3-4 sips of a soju-sake concoction around 1-2 months post op and I had the most horrible dumping experience soon after. Like laying on the bathroom floor horrible. It was the sugar in it. The handful of times I drank after that (during weight loss phase) I stuck to gin/vodka sodas & dry red wine. I was definitely affected with just a few sips, and the effects wore off pretty quickly. Now, lets talk maintenance. Freed from having to stay under a self-imposed calorie limit, I drank more. I drank more often than I did pre-op, but less overall, even including my occasional pre-op benders. I no longer only got to sloppy level when I drank, but to just a good buzz. And again, only when I was out and about. I'd say I had maybe 1-3 drinks a week. I still got buzzed relatively quickly (less than one full drink), and the effects did not last long (less than an hour). There were maybe 4-5 times I got pretty trashed during this time (i'm guessing on like 5-6 drinks), all while on some vacation or other, and once at a wedding. Then came lockdown in March last year. I was about 1.5 years out when Covid reared its ugly head, and just under a year into maintenance. My drinking increased exponentially over a couple months. These days, I drink at least one drink a day (usually two, occasionally much more, on those nights we have an extended dinner seating time, or when it was patio season last summer). Now according to the literature I have read, based on volume alone, I am an alcoholic. Go figure. Am I concerned? Honestly nowadays, not really. I did contemplate it in the beginning, especially cuz Mr would keep bringing up how my drinking has increased (in a joking way mostly...but he should talk, he drinks every day too. Almost always has...his drinking also increased with Covid. Granted, he has more mass than I do and has the metabolism of a hummingbird). It's been almost a year of this daily drinking now, and while I believe I could benefit from cutting down, I don't see it as an issue at the moment in terms of any decrease in quality of life or my own safety or the safety of those around me (but I suppose this is what anyone who drinks would say). We'll see. Back in the summer we agreed that each person in the house can call a "dry day" at any point and everyone must abide to no drinking that day. Though to date, no one has called it. That probably speaks to the mentality we got going on here, lol. I did a couple "dry weeks" on my own accord months ago, just to prove to Mr. & myself I didn't have a problem...these weeks went by uneventfully, but I'm not sure if it really proved anything. Very long story short, while I'm not advocating nor discouraging drinking either way to anyone, as with anything else in life, the hope is that you can be self-aware enough to know what YOUR acceptable limits are and try to stay within them. Sorry this was so long. Good Luck ❤️ P.S. In case you were wondering, I have pretty much maintained my weight (115 lbs +/- 5lbs) this entire time. Last year I reached my acceptable upper limit (120 lbs for more than 3-4 days in a row) twice and then switched gears to get back to 115. First time took me 3-4 weeks, second time took me 3-4 months (granted, I didn't try very hard). Today I am actually 6 lbs under my "normal", BUT I'm in transition at the moment as I've had zero exercise for about a month due to injury and i'm trying to offset that with a reduction in calories...and yeah, I haven't found the right level yet...so this is temporary, as far as I'm concerned. BUT I'm still drinking, lol, am just having less dessert 😜 P.P.S. I also smoke. But that's a whole other topic...

I had not considered getting a breast reduction or lift until today my PA mentioned that "sometimes insurance will cover it, if there's enough sag in the skin" I highly doubt I qualify, but wondered what info y'all had on this. Anyone had an insurance-supported lift or reduction? Is one considered "medically necessary" and the other "cosmetic?" I laughed as I told my provider. "Hey, if they'll pay for it, I'll have anything done!"

They did mine fully clothed shoes off... but then they subtracted a bit for clothing lol. I was on the cusp of qualifying... so honestly I hate a lot of food the week prior so I would be a little more bloated. I also knew I had to be able to prove that I lost some weight pre-op so I wanted to be up just enough to qualify and lose a couple pounds to stay qualified. The thing is.. if I tried, I could lose weight... but no matter what I did it wouldn't STAY OFF... so I knew I needed to do surgery at that point since nothing else worked even under physician guidance and prescribed weight loss treatments.

some of us do manage to blow pretty far past the statistics. It depends on how hard you're willing to work. I did exercise regularly, but I wouldn't say vigorously. They say weight loss is about 80% diet and only 20% exercise. I think that's probably true..

Just finished 48 hours on clear liquids. Feeling great and back down to 130.5 pounds. Today is day one of full liquids. Started the day with a protein shake. Hadn't had a protein shake in a really long time. Post op they made my stomach nauseous, Tolerating it fine today. Maybe I can re-incorporate into my regular diet for breakfast? That would be good! I had intended to do green smoothies, but I just don't get to it before work. I can keep a stash in my fridge at work and a stash in my fridge at home and always have it on hand for when I am ready for breakfast on the go. You know... there really is nothing wrong with my plan. My nutritionist had me do PRE-OP and then again POST-OP. I have done it two and a half times already. One and a half times before surgery.... once for many days, once for a few days.... both times guided by my nutritionist. And then of course the post-op one lasted a month also following nutritionist instructions. The nutritionist used it pre-operatively to get my weight a little lower AND to train for post-op. By now, I know what I am doing. And both hubby and I are nurses, so we both know how to watch for problems. It is also recommended by many surgeons as a pouch reset. When you start eating more than you should you stop recognizing the signals that you paid attention to the first few months post op. Does it really shrink your stomach back down? I suppose that depends on how badly you treated your stomach post operatively and for how long you abused your "new" stomach. I know I treated my new stomach VERY WELL for the first year. It is they last... up to 6 months that I believe I have pushed it beyond what I should. I believe I have a good change of shrinking it back down if I do this now. But if I chose NOT to do it now and don't get my diet under control then it will be much less likely to work as time goes on. Can I just start weighing and logging again? Sure. But I felt this was the better option for me to reset and retrain. BACK TO THE BASICS. FROM THE BEGINNING. Following my nutritionist instructions through the stages and back to lifestyle eating. Am I starving myself? Heck no! I have the extra fat to burn to sustain me through the last two days which is the only two days I am totally depriving myself of nutrients. Did I feel a little hungry now and then? Sure. But I drank a little broth or ate a little jello to get me through. Today I am going to make sure to pick the most nutritious full liquids I can. Done this before, I know how to do it. Am I lacking energy? Not really. I am pacing myself and keeping hydrated. Must have peed 50 times yesterday (exaggerating... but I was peeing very frequently yesterday). I also timed this with my vacation from work. It's Spring Break. I spent the first couple days catching up on housework. Now I am taking it easy while I get through the clear and full liquids stages. By the time I go back to work I will be on soft regular foods. I know how to do this, so I made sure to time it well. "sometimes these weird desperate extreme fixes sort of reinforce disordered eating habits". I find this statement baffling. This isn't a weird desperate extreme fix thing. This is a well established SHORT TERM diet plan that is prescribed by surgeons and nutritionist for a variety of reasons. Kick starting weight loss is one of them. I did not wait until my weight was out of control to do this. I am doing it when I am seeing a negative trend that I want to stop in it's tracks... to help me get back on track. I know my nutritionist would approve. How do I know that? We discussed this last year... when we were talking about stalls. And "reinforce disordered eating habits?" That is a lot of assuming about me. Yes, I was 100 pounds over weight... but I didn't gain weight for the same reasons everyone else may have gained weight. I didn't eat excessively large amounts of food... but I did eat like an average American. I have never been bulimic. I have never been anorexic. I have never followed unhealthy crash diets. Why did I gain weight? Well... the docs think it was triggered by many years of undiagnosed sleep apnea. And coupled with drinking a lot of calories (pepsi) and not picking the healthiest of foods. So tell me, how exactly is following a short term often medically prescribed diet followed by resuming a medically prescribed lifestyle diet going to reinforce disordered eating habits for me? It's not. This diet is not going to reinforce me drinking sugary drinks. Haven't done that for over 1 1/2 years and am not doing it during this pouch reset diet. And it is certainly not encouraging me to eat American size portions. Just the opposite. It is going to remind me what my portion sizes are going to be. And as for sweet cravings? Well... I might have them. But I am being very mindful during this and reinforcing good choices as I move through the phases. That is a good thing. And the grazing which is my actual problem right now? This is going to help me reset into a normal scheduled eating pattern with small portions which is my biggest goal. SO, will this help me accomplish my goals? YES IT WILL! As long as I stick to the plan and advance to my proper post-bariatric lifestyle diet. Again... don't need criticism. Just because you think you aren't criticizing doesn't mean it is true. Feel free to comment if you want to be supportive. Or not. Again... this was my "holding myself accountable" post. Because I know I need to hold myself accountable. Accountability is one of the keys to success. So... today and tomorrow full liquds! Which for me means mostly protein shakes and greek yogurt. Yes, my nutritionist considers greek yogurt to be a full liquid... and since it has protein and nutrients it goes nicely with my protein shakes to get me through the full liquid days.

66 lbs in two months is excellent - and yes, weight loss slows down quite a bit after the first month or two.

I think that a LOT of people have the reacation "All fat people self medicate with food...why should anyone be delayed from weight loss surgery because they do? Are the therapists on a power trip, are they just making money?" There is some truth in this...that nearly all of us medicate with food. But why is that an issue? There's a very common phenominon that occurs with bariatric surgery called cross or transfer addiction. It is said to affect about 30% of people who have surgery. When people find they can't eat to self medicate, they can switch to other addictions for relief. Not just alcohol and drugs. They can also become sex/intimacy addicts. They can start spending too much, gambling, there are a lot of ways for this to manifest. Exercise addiction. Controlling behaviors with family/children. Annorexia. Most of us think of annorexia as something absurd that could never happen to us....but it happens! Same disordered eating...just a different expression of it. Also, there's a reason they call it divorce surgery. It can and does add strain to a relationships to have dynamics change profoundly. Eating is a big part of socializing, relaxing, relating to family, friends, coworkers. Eating dysfunction can be familial and codependent. There are some big changes that go with this whole process. Sometimes, they're easy changes, and sometimes they're not. Sometimes they cause all hell to break loose for the person inside them. Also, there is tremendous risk of remission...where you lose weight for a little while, then the food addiction and disordered eating come roaring back and you can physically injure yourself if you don't have other coping mechanisms in place. I am not saying that ANY of these situations describe any particular posters here any more than they could potentially describe all of us. Just sayin....if at your psych eval your therapist recommends more support, more preparation....that can be a good and responsible thing to do for yourself. That can help guarantee your best chances. It can make this time of change more joyful and less stressful. It can make you more successful in the long run. Figuring this stuff out is a great investment in yourself. Best wishes to all.

Had my surgery in 2018 and 2019 I had only lost 80 lb. Since then I've had a tummy tuck again. So that means I have less bile in my stomach. Since then I have not lost anything and this is the year 2021 . I have not lost anything since then and why am I not losing. I am eating right but not getting a lot of exercise because of this pandemic covid-19. So I am walking my dog and doing what I can around the house to keep busy and trying to burn off calories but nothing has worked. I don't have the money to go to a exercise gym so my plan is to workout at home but I don't like doing it alone. Don't have a lot of friends. And don't know what to do I consulted my doctor and he said it's because of this covid-19 after this it will come off. I'm just getting stressful in getting down on myself cuz I don't know what else to do. I want to be thinner I want to look good. And I want to be healthier. I'm doing everything correctly but why am I'm not losing anything I know everyone says this two to three weeks stall will pass and then our bodies won't start losing more body weight. And went through the two to three weeks tall and my body has not lost anything since then. And I am getting frustrated. I'm thinking about not eating and starving myself to lose the weight. I eat very small as it is now drink the shakes that I should be 4 meals breakfast lunch and dinner and I haven't lost anything since. I was down before my second surgery at 219 and then I gained 10 lbs back and now I am at 232 and maintain that weight for now. Not lost anything since then. But my hair is still coming out. Im down on myself . don't know what else to do? Why can't I be thin. I want to lose another 40 lbs . be under 200 lbs I'll be good. But can't lose fast enough ! Help me please, tell me what can I do!

It is absolutely normal and you shouldn't let it discourage you. Through your whole weight loss journey you will hit plateaus in which you are not losing any weight for a while. Again, it is completely normal. I would say that if a few months go by and you still haven't started losing any weight again, then you should look into what may be the cause. Good luck and congratulations on the 21 pounds!

Hi everyone I had my surgery Feb 24 of this year. I lost 21 pounds in two weeks. Going into my third week. I have noticed that I have stalled no weight loss. I am working out and eating soft foods but not much because I get full after a couple of bites. Is this normal? I am starting to feel a little defeated already.

I’ve lost 33 pounds in my first two months lost bypass. I’m pretty happy with this although for some reason I thought it would be faster. The doctor said it’s really going to slow down - I didn’t realize this. Any thoughts or comments? I have 65 pounds to go!

Hello, my name is Sabrena, I'm new here. I had the sleeve done on 2/25/21 so this coming thurs, I'll be 3 weeks post-op & down 29 pounds from date of surgery. The first two weeks used to hurt to sip on fluids especially if I sipped too much or just sipping on protein shakes which my nutritionist said was normal. Now, I'm able to take bigger sips (by accident) and noticed I have no pain at all doing so & able to chug down those 1oz cups without any problems in no time at all as well! Is that normal?? Also, I still cant get in the 800 calories they keep telling me I need to get in. I plate a half cup of pureed fish or chicken & 1/4 cup of puree veggies & can only get down half of it before my stomach cramps telling me nomore. So what do I do besides keep drinking my protein shakes to get in atleast my protein? I dont want to do anything to hinder my weight loss

Omg 100lbs in 6 months?? Wow. Now I am worried I chalked it up to my having a lower BMI. But we started at the same weight I am 5 months post op and only loss 43lbs. What did you do? Sent from my SM-N981U using BariatricPal mobile app

I had my consult on Monday and have been cleared to "enter the program" with the plan for the sleeve procedure. I have insurance approval, just waiting to receive my first appointments and get clearance from the various specialties. I saw in the note that there is a 5%pre surgery weight loss goal. Now it is a matter of hurry up and wait........

I just had VSG 3/12 and had to stay at a family member’s house since I was unable to drive myself around. These last few days have been filled with temptations!!!! She’s brought chicken nuggets/fries, chipotle, Alfredo/garlic bread, pizza, cinnamon fried donuts, etc. home. And of course I’ve just been creeping around the kitchen staring at all of it like a chicken nugget won’t hurt... even though I’m only 4 days post op and I can only get down popsicles and ice chips. I starve every single day all day and it’s been trying times. I would never jeopardize my weight loss and health for a darn chicken nugget, but it’s definitely a mind game. I feel like I’m in an episode of jigsaw. I definitely need to go home where the only thing I have in the kitchen is protein powder and pudding. How did you guys get through trying times and temptations?? What did you tell yourself?

So, I had my surgery October 15, 2020 and weighed 249 on surgery day. May of 2020 the doctor said I was 259. Anyway, Today I weighed at 201. I am happy about this but I feel like it’s not enough. In January I had my 3 month appointment and weighed 208. My doctor said that was too much weight loss....I was working out 45 minutes a day to make sure I maintained a calorie deficit. They told me the surgery is the tool and to let it work. Well, to prove them I was doing what I know would work for me I haven’t done any workouts except walking. No weights, no spin classes etc... and since that January appt I have only lost 7 pounds. I am super frustrated!! I’m aware that the surgery is a tool but I wasn’t always fat. An injury and two surgeries in 3 years for it plus ending up with secondary adrenal insufficiency in 2016 and on prednisone for over a year cause my weight gain and nothing I could do would help. Prior to my foot injury I worked out two hours a day 3 days a week and and hour a day on all the other days and off on Sunday. I feel like I should have had the gastric bypass. I was told by my mother in law I would want the bypass but I felt like that was so invasive and the very last step. But now, with all the stalls and especially this last stall and the doctors office telling me the opposite of everything I’ve ever known I feel defeated. I was never what you would call a skinny girl. I have a lot of muscle and a ghetto booty and I’m ok with that but I feel like I will never see 150 or less. And some days I’m so hungry and seems like I never get full even though I clearly am full. Did they cut enough of my stomach out? The doctors office can’t even tell me that. I don’t even want to go back for my 6 month appointment in April.

I am curious as to what it was like to loose weight after pregnancy?? I had my gastric sleeve surgery June 2020 and I am currently planning on trying to get pregnant around November-December...My only concern is what is it like to loose the weight all over again after giving birth????

I personally know of at least 3 different people who had the surgery, and they ALL gained their weight back, and then some. It didn't stop me from having WLS because I know that I am different, and have my mind set up to think differently. My own sister is not supportive of my loss. She has said some nasty things to me. We haven't spoke since Christmas. Just ignore the haters, and move on. People always feel the need to be negative for some reason or another. Don't let it deter your healthy journey.

ive personally found that besides my weight loss im going through so many other changes. for th efirst time in 3 years i got a period! for the first time in years ive been able to move around and do things i never thought that i would be able to do, its amazing. its a life i never thought that i would have again and i am so hjappy top be living it and i hope that i am doing it correctly. i guess im curious what changes happened for others that you were suprised, excited, scared for. im so happy this was the chopice that i made

From first appointment to surgery date was about 6 months for me. All surgeons are different. Mine wanted a TON of prereqs. 10% weight loss with dietician and nurse visits, lots of testing, psychiatrist, fitness and healthy cooking classes, etc. Some will just schedule you. I remember thinking it was an unfair pain in the butt at the time....but all of the prerequisite hoops I had to jump through have been invaluable. It was a much bigger undertaking than I imagined, and I've appreciated the support.