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wishing you the best of luck on your LB journey! My sister had a gastric bypass and also lost a lot of weight and then gained it back and became an alcoholic. I'm so worried about her. I asked my Dr if he would band her and he said no b/c she didn't have her head into it. I think she messed up b/c she never went to support meetings. Be sure you post often here and get the support you need for success. Best wishes to you!

An I drink alcohol 11 days post op. I wanted to have a glass of wine and I read all of my books and handouts and I don't even see anything about alcohol!

I asked that question today when I went in for my first fill. We have a number of wedding's to attend this summer and other events and I would like to be able to have a drink or two at them. He said it was ok to do it "occasionally" but to remember that alcohol contains calories and sugar and will slow down the weightloss. I am to avoid anything carbonated too, so soda mixers are out. I specifically asked about a margarita and he said that would be ok, since it wasn't carbonated - just to do it occasionally - not like everything night of the week or anything - once a week at the max. But if I see my weightloss progress really start to slow down I may have to re-think my priorities!!

I am getting banded in 26 days and people keep asking me about alcohol. I am not a big drinker. I dislike most drinks. I can have a beer or two sometimes, or maybe a Margarita (which I know is never going to happen again). I was wondering if anyone had tried a drink with the band and what the results were. My Mom is thinking of getting banded, but is a wine collector and does not want to give that up. Thanks

I need help letting go, food has been my escape and friend for my entire life. Now, I am waiting on insurance approval and date for my sleeve procedure and I'm scarde. Fear, I know, is my will trying to predict outcome, control my situation. I am 14 years clean and sober (on March 15), food has taken the place of my drugs and alcohol addiction. Actually, food has probably always been my drug of choice. My weight is about 260, and worse than that I feel awful. My husband is almost 300 lbs, and also going through the process of having a sleeve surgery. We are both active in AA and NA, but have not let go of food addiction. What will my life be like when I can't use food to isolate, escape? Will I replace it with yet just another addiction? God help me to finally surrender.

Hey everyone I’m about 7 weeks out down 31 lbs since about 2 weeks ago. Don’t really weight myself outside of the doctors. Anyways. How many people eat whatever they want and still lost all their weight. My doctors has me on no restrictions as far as my diet. My NUT said it’s about Portion control and not really the foods you eat. I’m still trying to get my liquids down, my protein needs to be better but the shakes make me vomit and sugar alcohols give me the runs. Been on real food for about 2 weeks with no problems but I don’t want to mess myself up. They told me stay off this site because listening to others will ruin me but to just listen my body. It knows what it an handle. Still like input however. Do you diet or no ???

Well I have only told one friend about the surgery. I was a person that just could not see getting gastric bypass. My sister did and she looks awful, rotted teeth, no bone density, no muscle, just flabby gross and very sickly. Then to top it off she became an alcoholic! I am not doing this for anyone but me. I went to CA with my granddaughter and just had no strength in my legs to do all I wanted to and so that was it for me. I took my 10k from my retirement acct and 5 weeks later I am done. The incisions aren't leaking badly, but the coughs still give a new adventure in pain. I was bad today, ate some chocolate covered strawberries. Mothers day gift. I am in some pain but working through. I need and want to lose weight. I am tired of being tired and fat and weak. I will resume my pool time as soon as dr says I can. swimming will tone me best! Keep smiling!

I'd like to add my 2 cents worth here. I don't think it's a good idea to go overboard with the alcohol consumption all in one sitting (for obvious reasons) and also because you don't want to be dry heaving or vomiting profusely with the band. You could damage yourself or your band. That being said, I like most alcohol with the exception of gin (allergy to juniper berries) and moonshine! As I age, I find that the sulfites in wine really give me a horrible headache. I've had no problems with organic wines though but have a hard time finding them. Vodka is by far my favorite hard drink and I like the Crystal Light idea. I'll have to try that one.

I know I don't need to drink and I plan on making good choices. I just know it will be a little bit hard when everyone else is drinking and eating and I'm sorta sitting there. I was told carbonated drinks are out and the only carbonated drink I have is beer....so non-alcoholic beer won't work. I was also told that you cannot gulp water...that you have to sip and you cannot use a straw? This is from NUT clases. The most important thing to me is that I am successful with this band. I am not happy or healthy being obese and able to eat/drink everything so I am going to have to make lots of changes. I appreciate the suggestion for drinking the protein drink, etc. My life will be changing in so many ways. :-) It's all good! Thanks for all of your replies!

I smoked for over 25 years, with a ~2 year quit in there but went right back to smoking during a stressful time period... that being said, I quit completely a bit over 2 months before my surgery. I haven't gone back either, and I miss smoking and still think about it almost daily even tho I'm more than 110 days clean. And I can't promise that I'm forever quit since I do miss it so much. But here's the thing: I know that I'm an addict. I don't really miss it; that's the addiction talking. It's just like being an alcoholic. I can't have just one smoke or do it for a little while and quit again. I will always struggle with staying off cigarettes and I recognize that, and will do my very best to make sure I don't pick it back up again because it will hurt my health and likely kill me if I do. So yeah, totally conflicted but hanging on as hard as I can to my quit because I deserve to be healthy - despite that stupid addiction. There are no benefits from smoking - zero, zilch, nada. I had weight loss surgery because I also had issues with food and eating and I want to be healthy and live an active and enjoyable life with my husband. Being morbidly obese wasn't conducive to that idea, and neither is smoking. There is no good reason to smoke, and I've witnessed two family members die a slow, agonizing smoking related death... I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. And yet I still have that insane little voice inside that just wants a damned cigarette. Irrational and stupid, but that's what an addiction is. You can't get any more blatant than that. So that is just one more reason to not smoke - because I am not going to be thought of (in my own mind anyway) as a stupid person. And using an e-cig is just as bad if not worse. All you're doing is changing the method of delivery and still putting poison into your body while fooling yourself into believing that it is healthy. They're still in the early days of studying the health effects and the news coming out now is NOT good. Saying they're safer than cigarettes (even using the no nicotine cartridges) is like saying that playing with one poisonous snake is safer than playing with 10 of them... they are still dangerous. http://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/California-Declares-E-Cigs-Are-Health-Threats-290104881.html https://www.sciencenews.org/article/health-risks-e-cigarettes-emerge I quit using the Allen Carr method (the vids are available up on youtube) and a phone app (Butt Out only available on iphones unfortunately, but there are plenty of quit apps) and told myself that the quit was temporary until I got healed from surgery. But I'm sticking with it as long as I can, because I know I feel better now than when I was smoking, and frankly it's nice to not be coughing and wheezing, have warm fingers and toes, and not smell nasty (and yes, you do smell nasty ALL OF THE TIME to non-smokers - that sh!t is in your hair, your clothes, embedded in your skin... I can smell smokers a mile away now, and had friends tell me the same thing). Look, I'm not telling anyone to quit smoking. You have to be an adult to smoke anyway, so I'm assuming that you know enough to know that it's got no benefits, is harmful to your health and you're wasting money and throwing away years of your life to do something that is in essence a nasty habit that will cripple and then kill you in the end. Only you can decide if you're worth quitting for - no one can do it for you. But if you just went through something as extreme as weight loss surgery, you have to care a little about getting your health and well-being back on track!

If people believe that you "cheat" if you have wls instead of doing it all on your own without outside help, ask them if they think an alcoholic getting sober without outside help is cheating? I get frustrated when some think that a person loosing weight without any tools are better than others. It´s like if I stop smoking using pads it´s not worth as much as if I stopped smoking cold turkey?

Popcorn is a real slider food. I can eat a huge bag of it at the movies. I do eat nuts too. I am not a drinker but I have had some alcohol and I get drunk now on one drink. You need to ask your doctor when you're cleared for nuts and popcorn though. I eat nuts daily because I believe healthy fat is good for us. Dr. OZ says we all should eat 10 almonds a day!

I'm so sorry you no longer have the friendship with your friend that you used to have......and it IS healthy to acknowledge that heredity does play a part in the fact that your friend is drinking (like her father)....is there any way that she would accept help? I assume you have been there/done that....will keep her in my prayers also......no one deserves a life of alcoholism....it really is NO different than being addicted to food....same struggles, different reason..........'maybe' if you shared your lap band info with her it would help? She will see that you, too, have a struggle of your own and are doing something about it......just a thought

You'll be fine, just don't drive & don't drink alcohol.

I'm 11 weeks / 3 months post op and I can say that at this point I've tried everything I've craved. I do track every bite. I don't dare to try bread, pasta, tortillas or rice. I just feel it will be very heavy for me and I'd rather pass. I'm not a alcohol drinker so that's no biggy for me. I feel very normal with family and friends just takes me longer to eat a tiny plate/bites (I've adapted very well to my sleeve) loving the results.

I'm not saying this is an idea solution, but this is what I've done, in order of best to worst: Look up KETO recipes for sweets! You can make your own chocolate (yes, even bars!), use fat alternatives to reduce the fat in the recipes, and eat it pretty much GUILT free. Make it with erithrytol or stevia as your sweetener so you don't have an insulin response. You can also look into Lily's chocolate bars, your local super market may have them and they use stevia. Buy Slim Fast fat bomb peanut butter cups and have ONE. They're made with erithrytol so they're good! Or look at Quest protein bars or Atkins candy. Try to avoid Maltitol, which is a sugar alcohol that WILL spike your insulin and can perpetuate further cravings. In a pinch, get sugar free chocolate (like Russell Stovers SUGAR FREE) and only have a portion size or less. Definitely don't have more or you'll be married to the porcelain throne all night. Warning: they are dangerously delicious and, much like sugar, won't fully satisfy that craving and will leave you wanting more so exercise extreme caution and willpower here. Good luck!

I am very aware of these types of difficulties. I personally know of a woman (work colleague ) who went off the rails post bypass weight loss. She died in her sleep of organ failure in her early 40s. I was scared I would die too so I inquiries further to find she was type 1 diabetic and had become not a problem drinker but an alcoholic....a lethal combination. I almost didn't go ahead with WLS because of this. I am glad I didn't imagine this needed to be everyone's fate. I have a friend going g through separation and divorce. She got even skinnier, smoked way more and started drinking booze instead of eating. It happens to non WLS patients too. She is back on track now. Big life stressor can cause outrageous behavior - but it is the minority and help can be found. I just hope people don't avoid life saving surgery on the chance they might be the one that suffers an addiction transference. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using the BariatricPal App

Bariatric Realities I’m doing this series called “Bariatric Realities” as a result of many frustrations. In this case, the energy generated in my body and brain, as a result of these annoyances, is my motivation for developing this series. I need to “get it out,” put my thoughts and feelings on paper - and on video - and share them. I want to talk about what I see and hear, day in and day out, from the patients I work with. These vulnerable men and women tell me about the realities of dealing with weight issues, the struggles related to getting extra weight off and keeping it off, and the underlying emotional hurdles interfering with their progress. Bariatric Realities I’m doing this series called “Bariatric Realities” as a result of many frustrations. In this case, the energy generated in my body and brain, as a result of these annoyances, is my motivation for developing this series. I need to “get it out,” put my thoughts and feelings on paper - and on video - and share them. I want to talk about what I see and hear, day in and day out, from the patients I work with. These vulnerable men and women tell me about the realities of dealing with weight issues, the struggles related to getting extra weight off and keeping it off, and the underlying emotional hurdles interfering with their progress. I’m frustrated that patients, whether they are seeking medical weight loss assistance or opting for weight loss surgery, are given only part of the story and only part of the solution. The emphasis in all bariatric programs, obviously, is on meal planning and “behavior modification.” These are, of course, essential elements of weight loss and healthy weight management, but they are only part of the deal. The emotional components related to weight issues – shame, self-esteem, body image, family of origin issues, past trauma, relationship changes following weight loss – these and many other crucial, emotional/psychological issues are so often ignored. Not to me, they aren’t. And these will be addressed in this series. In addition, I want to inform other professionals in the medical, psychological and psychiatric fields about things patients (and, to be fair, some professionals) know, but the scholarly types won’t listen to, because what I have to say isn’t “evidence based.” Meaning there are no formal research studies or statistics to verify or validate what I, and so many others, know to be true. Oh, I am a believer in, and supporter of evidence based research – without a doubt! And yet, so many topics that need to be addressed in the area of weight loss have not been formally researched, nor do they always lend themselves to scientific investigation. (Not to mention, the evidence found in evidence-based research is very often conflicting and ever changing. That, however is another paper…) I will address those very real problems related to weight loss and maintenance that are largely ignored due to a lack of research-based evidence. And yet, those topics are so very, very real. Here’s a sneak peak at the types of things I’ll be addressing in the Bariatric Reality series. Alcohol Use After WLS This topic is widely debated by patients and professionals alike. It is, indeed, discussed at the professional meetings. In fact, just a few years ago, a big fuss was made at one of the largest bariatric surgery professional meetings about brand new research related to Alcohol Use Disorders following weight loss surgery. The actual researchers presented findings of their newly published data recently released in The Journal of The American Medical Association (JAMA): Prevalence of Alcohol Use Disorders Before and After Bariatric Surgery. The authors reported a 2% increase in Alcohol Use Disorders at the 2-year post-surgical assessment. Is this information helpful? Of course it is! Does it tell much of a story, really? If you ask those of us who work day in and day out in surgical weight loss programs, I’d venture to say that the majority would report that this 2% statistic at two years post-op doesn’t even begin to tell the reality of the problems we see with “Alcohol Use Disorders” following weight loss surgery… some a year after, some two years after, some five years after. And it’s not just alcohol. It’s also abuse of pain medications, spending, promiscuous sexual behavior and eating disorders. And tell me… how many WLS patients who have “Alcohol Use Disorders” haven’t returned to their bariatric centers for follow up to be included in the research results? How many haven’t mentioned anything about “Alcohol Use Disorders” to the multidisciplinary team? A lot. Yet we can’t present the very real information from patients who tell us about their friends who won’t come see the doctor after their surgery … the ones they are worried about because the person of concern isn’t eating but is consuming the majority of their calories from alcohol. We can’t count, or report on, the patients whose won’t come in for a follow-up and who drink so much they are falling down and hurting themselves. There is no “data” to indicate the number of patients calling and insisting they need more or higher doses of pain medication and become hostile or abusive to the staff when told the doctor won’t prescribe any more. We don’t have “numbers” for the patients who sit in my office and cry because they are sleeping with anyone who shows any interest in them. We have no data on the number of patients who tell me and other providers around the country that they meet strangers at motels for sex, something they never did before. How do we help educate other professionals about very real, very dangerous “anecdotal” reports of problems, when, alas, we have no DATA? No, this type of information is not discussed at the “professional” meetings because we don’t have scientific evidence. But these things are happening. They are real. And they need to be talked about. So I’ll talk about them and hope someone listens. A lot of someones – so that people won’t be afraid to ask for help for these issues, knowing they’re not alone. And so that professionals may – just may – stop pretending these things aren’t happening because there are no “numbers” to support the reality. Food Addiction Last year, I spoke at a national weight loss conference for overweight and obese patients. The moderator of the panel of which I was a part, felt strongly that food/eating is not an addiction. He therefore posed this question to the audience of approximately 200 people: “How many of you consider yourself to be a food addict?” Nearly every hand in the audience shot up immediately. I explained to him, and to the audience, that the hallmark of addiction is knowing something is a problem and has caused problems (think of all the health-related problems associated with obesity), wanting to stop (wanting to lose weight) having made many attempts to stop (consider all of the prior dieting), but not being able to stop (most people regain any lost weight from dieting and feel hopeless about being able to make permanent changes to their eating and exercise behavior). These people who consider themselves food addicts are addicted to food/eating, physically and/or emotionally. They know their weight is causing serious problems in their lives, they want to stop, but they cannot. That’s addiction. “Where’s the evidence, Connie?” Well, I don’t have it. And I can’t find that many others do, either. I did find a “scholarly article” from 2013 of a study of 652 adults from the general population in Newfoundland, in which the prevalence of “food addiction” was 5.4%. The majority of other “scholarly articles” that even discuss food addition focus primarily on Binge Eating Disorder or the “neurobiology” of food addiction. Often the conclusions are similar: professionals differ on their beliefs about the idea of whether or not “food addiction” is real. Ask your patients. They believe food addiction is real. So if, at the professional meetings, we can only discuss food addiction based on the “research,” it seems we are limited to debating the existence of food addiction, or to sharing the percentage of “food addicts” in Newfoundland. How, then, are we supposed to talk to professionals about the myriad of non-scientifically-researched REAL issues that patients experience in their REAL lives? I’m frustrated. Bariatric Realities is my new outlet. I will talk in REAL language about the REAL issues experienced by the REAL patients I work with all day long. I hope it will get others talking! Share your REAL thoughts, feelings and observations with me and other readers! THANKS! The NEXT TOPIC for Bariatric Realities: Genetics and Sources of Weight Problems – What ARE You Accountable for? Connie Stapleton, PhD connie@conniestapletonphd.com Facebook: Connie Stapleton Twitter: @cstapletonphd LinkedIn: Connie Stapleton, PhD

This is my story. I’ll try to keep it as short and to the point as I can, and I’m not going to tiptoe around this. I was banded December 22, 2009. That was the day I was reborn, and my life changed in ways I never dreamed possible. I believe that for many of us; the ones with “true” addictions, it takes “rolling around in the gutter” before we can begin to rise up. My darkest days were when I was in the throes of my eating disorder. I can honestly tell you that if it weren’t for my children I think I would have killed myself. I used find comfort in imagining how I would “do it.” I was just so tired. Everyday was the same as the last. I would wake up and know that I was going to lose that battle with food, yet again. Some days I’d lose it before breakfast. Some days it might take me a few weeks before I finally lost control. Once, I made it over a year and lost 71 pounds…only to gain every ounce, and then some back again. So, I just wanted it to end. I just wanted peace. And don’t get me wrong; I refer to my eating disorder in the past tense, but it’s not a “past tense” thing at all. I consider myself to be a “recovering addict.” An alcoholic doesn’t get to say, “I used to be an alcoholic,” and I don’t get to say, “I used to have an eating disorder.” I DO have an eating disorder. I have to remember that or it will sneak up on me again and kick my ass. So, I say all that to really say this; people have to come into their own truth in their own time, and sadly, some never come into their truth at all. If you would have told me that one day I would have to be careful and remember to eat, I would have told you that you were crazy. If you would have told me that someday I would no longer be obsessed by food, I would have never believed a word of it. If you would have told me that one day I would give up sugar, I would have told you that you had the wrong girl. If you would have told me that I would no logger be plagued by, “when, where, what and how much do I get to eat, I would have told you, “Not in this lifetime.” But all of those things, and so much more has happed. My life is so great that I can’t believe it’s mine. Food is simply not that big of a deal to me any more, and I am so blessed to have this wonderful “tool” to help me succeed I’m free! I’m happy and really; the weight loss, those 60 pounds; that is “secondary.” YES; secondary; the peace of mind; that’s the PRIMARY benefit. Dropping 60 pounds in 5 months; that is simply an added bonus. I’m free! I’m happy and I am so BLESSED! So, all of you people who whine about liquid diets, or not getting to eat a bunch of junk or having to work out, or gaining weight, or the pain and discomfort of eating too fast or not chewing enough, or stretch marks, or not being able to pig out like you used to on holidays or special occasions…ENOUGH ALREADY! SHUT UP! I GET SO SICK OF THE UNGRATEFUL ATTITUDES! IF the bad is not working for you, it’s probably for one or two of the following reasons: You need a fill. You’re drinking with meals. You’re not working out. You’re not eating “protein” first, or taking in enough protein.. You’re “grazing” or eating a bunch of height/empty caloric foods You’re not “listening to your body,” when it tells you that you’ve had enough to eat. You’re not using the band as a “tool;” You’re expecting the band to do everything for you. Being banded is not a lifestyle change; it’s a lifestyle OVERHAUL. So, in life; if you're not getting the results you want, either change what you're doing or live with.

Okay...so, I wasn’t trying to judge or come across as harsh in my previous blog, and for MONTHS I’ve read so MUCH B.S…and I didn’t blog anything “negative,” because I didn’t want to be negative, or hurt anyone's feelings. But for the love of Kirstie Ally, people; let’s all just ‘fess up and be honest! For those who have legitimate problems with their band...for those who have worked and struggled, and continue to work and struggle (and, yes, it will continue to be a struggle, and NO Virginia, there is no magic-cure-all-procedure…you stand a better chance of there actually being a Santa Claus.) For everyone who needs to hear some encouraging words every once in a while, or for people who have simple questions or suggestions; for the pre-ops and post-ops (can you hear the national anthem playing in the background?...) this site is a great place. HOWEVER… for the people (and you know who you are,) who whine and cry and bitch and moan because they: · Can't seem to stop drinking sodas, and then proclaim that: the band isn’t working. · It's day 3 post op, and even though they’ve managed to puree lasagna and a Bundt cake and drink it through a straw, they CAN'T understand why: the band isn’t working. · Their friends and family aren't supportive and they don't understand. They continue to insist upon having fried chicken and mashed potatoes, sweet corn casserole, yeast rolls and fried okra every Friday night, and they simply can’t tell them “no.” I mean never mind the fact that they sabotage the Bandsters efforts and don’t need to be eating that unhealthy crap…they fix the food anyway, eat the food, and then complain that the band isn’t working. · Instead of eating protein first, they eat a big plate of loaded up nachos because the extra cheese and meat and melted cheese, and cheese IS protein, and then; SURPRISE, they don’t lose any weight and of course; the band isn’t working. · Just can’t seem to get into working out in any way shape or form, and so, it must be that: the band isn’t working. News Flash: most Bandsters; we don’t get “into” working out either, but we do it; not because it’s fun or makes us feel alive or at peace with the world, but because we know we have to. · Kind of, sort of went a little crazy celebrating Vernal Equinox day, their niece’s graduation, their best friends, sister’s son’s Bris, or that most recent holiday and grazed 24/7 on crap that they KNOW they shouldn’t’ t have been eating, and now: the band isn’t working. · They count alcohol as part of their water intake…Eight, 8 ounce glasses of Peach Stoli and tonic a day!...but: the band isn’t working. · They figure that since they’ve had the band, and even though it’s been stressed that it is just a tool and, that they have to eat three small meals a day...of lean, healthy foods, and become physically active, that they can continue to do things way they’ve always done it, somehow get completely different results, because hey, when they tell everyone how the band works and what to do, they weren’t really talking to them…just everybody else, and by the way; the band isn’t working. So, yeah…there it is. For all you pre-ops who may be reading this, take heart; the BAND DOES WORK...as a wonderful, life changing tool. You do your part and it will work. For all of you post-ops and Bandsters; the BAND DOES WORK…as a wonderful, life changing tool...You do your part…really do your part and it will work.

Hello everyone I’m six weeks out and I’ve had a few bad headaches not sure why I drink a lot of water so I’m not dehydrated can anyone relate .. someone said that maybe I’m going into ketosis .. I’ve never suffered from headaches and I don’t drink alcohol .. help

How did I let this happen again? I had lost nearly 60 pounds, and slowly but surely, the weight had reappeared. I say that as though it happened without my knowledge or consent. I guess it would be more appropriate to say I put the weight back on. I wear it around like a lead coat. It stifles me, it breaks me, it pains me. Yet, I have done this over and over and over for my whole life. All the fluffy girls reading this know exactly what I am talking about. As a collective, we have probably gained and lost the same 60 pounds a million times. I hate to think it is because I am lazy, or that it is because I have no will power. I know that’s what most people think when they look at me - that woman is a glutton. I suppose there is some truth to it. Although, if they knew how disheartening it is to reach a goal, only to have it taken away . . . wait, there I go again, acting like some invisible power caused this. I know I have to take responsibility. I did this to myself. It didn’t happen to me, I caused it. But could it be that I can’t help it? It may be my fault, but maybe I just need some help to be successful. I tried many different things to “help” but nothing worked in the end. Weight Watchers was great, and I certainly learned a great deal about what foods to eat, and what portion size I should be eating. I remember the first time I learned about the portion size for pasta and rice. I think I laughed out loud. I did lose weight, quickly at first, but I never could get past that 40 pound mark. I had such a long way to go, over 100 pounds, and stalling out at 40 pounds just threw me over the edge. And when I would cheat, I WOULD CHEAT. I think it is a great deal like being an alcoholic. If I had one drink, or in my case, bite, it was all over. Forget about moderation, or “Points” or whatever. Then getting back on the wagon was harder than ever. Again, I know, excuses, excuses. Nevertheless, that was my pattern. I even tried medication for a while. I went to my doctor and begged for help. I remember saying, “I think something must be wrong with me. Even when I am really good, for a really long time, I can’t seem to lose the weight I need to lose!” So she gave me Wellbutrin. It states clearly that it is a medication for depression that should not be taken by people with eating disorders. Well, at 300 pounds, isn’t it fair to say I had an eating disorder? 50 pounds later, gained, not lost, I decided to quit taking Wellburtin. It definitely took the edge off, and helped me realize that I probably have some anxiety issues to work on, but it certainly did not help me lose any weight. In fact, it just made me complacent. The end result, however, was that it did force me to recognize that I have an addiction to food. It forced me to recognize that there was not going to be an easy fix for me. That was a huge disappointment. So, this last bit of temporary weight loss came from a surprising turn of events. I was pregnant, and all of a sudden, food was not my first priority. Taking care of the little being inside me was the most important thing of all. Because I was so large, 355 to start the pregnancy, my doctor was very worried about gestational diabetes. I met with a dietician at the hospital, and I followed her directions to the letter. I cut back on carbs, no more orange juice, lots of fiber, plenty of protein. Well, compared to the fast food junk I had been living on up to that point, it was no surprise that I started to lose weight. All told, I gained 13 pounds through my pregnancy, but lost 35 immediately after my daughter was born. Then, the most difficult thing I have ever had to do in my life occurred. My dear little one came 6 weeks early and was critically ill. She had to stay in the NICU for nearly a month. For the very first time in my life, I did not turn to food for comfort. In fact, I could not stand the thought of eating a thing. Leaving the hospital without your baby is the most unnatural thing in the world. I felt like I was literally being torn apart. I remember, the night I was discharged from the hospital, my husband and I were walking across the parking lot, and I said, “I feel like I am forgetting something.” Then I broke down and bawled. I don’t think I quit crying for the rest of the evening. I had to pump every three hours because I was hoping to breast feed my baby. Since I wasn’t eating, there wasn’t any milk to pump. I didn’t figure this out for about three weeks, and was getting very discouraged. However, I did find it funny that every time I turned around, someone was trying to make me eat. It was the strangest thing! My father especially, who was such a champion for me during that time – driving me back and forth to the hospital – would always try to get me to eat. I just couldn’t do it. In the end I lost an additional 20 pounds, creating an ultimate weight loss of about 55 pounds at that point. Eventually, my beautiful baby did come home. She is the light of my life. Being her mother is what I have been waiting for. I know all mothers probably feel this way, but she is the most lovely creature I have ever seen. She spreads such joy everywhere we go! I feel so blessed to have a baby that can make even total strangers smile with glee. I continued to lose weight. Ava and I walked every day. All the climbing up and down the stairs with baskets of laundry didn’t hurt either. Breastfeeding did work out in the end, so I know that helped me shed a few pounds as well. All told, I lost over 60 pounds. Then, I had to go back to work. Summer was over, and I had to return to my job as a literacy specialist at an elementary school. I started eating again. It happened slowly, and I saw it happening, but I didn’t do anything about it. It was as though I could watch myself through someone else’s eyes, but I didn’t try to intervene. I just kept eating. WHY? I have thought about this a great deal, and I don’t have any good answers. Was I feeling guilty about taking my baby to daycare? Probably. Was I worn out and looking for comfort? Probably. Was I wishing for more consistent help from my husband? Probably. Are those good reasons to gain 60 pounds? Absolutely not. So here I am, obese again, trying to raise a well-adjusted girl in the United States. That is why I have made this decision. She is the reason I am going to be successful this time, even though I have been unsuccessful all the other times. I want to raise her, not watch her from the sidelines. I want to still be alive when she gets married and has beautiful babies of her own. I want to be able to chase her if she is getting into harms way. I will do this. So that brings us up to date. I have decided to have gastric banding, also known ad Lap-Band surgery. This simply has to work. I have to do the hard work to make it work. I am going to be successful at this! Several things happened to bring me to this decision. My good friend Heidi had gastric bypass surgery a little over a year ago. I mention this for several reasons. First of all, I love Heidi. I have always thought she was one of the most beautiful women I have ever met, even when she was heavy. Second, Heidi has always reminded me of myself. We were both women of faith, school teachers, intelligent, opinionated and well-read. I hold her in the highest esteem and respect her immensely. When Heidi told me she was going to have gastric bypass surgery, I was so excited for her. She had followed a path similar to mine, struggled with her weight all her life, tried all the commercially available programs, all to no avail. I was a bit worried of course, especially because I had just heard about another person I knew that had died from complications from bypass surgery. I started thinking about the notion of never being able to eat gluttonous amounts of food again. I thought about not being able to drink a can of soda pop. I thought about eating only Dixie Cup sized potions. Yuck. That was not for me. Not only that, it scared me. (continued in part two)

Its hard to believe my banding is only one week away now. I've been working on this ALL YEAR, literally. I decided in early December last year that I was going to pursue getting WLS and after 6 months nutrition visits, two denials, two appeals, and finally one APPROVAL, I am scheduled for Lapband surgery in exactly one week, 12/17!!! Ever since my approval, I have been feeling more optimistic about my whole life and have been making healthy changes to my lifestyle. My surgeon does not require a pre-op diet, though, so I haven't really buckled down or made any real rules for myself. The only exception being that I cut out alcohol last week. I love my wine and gin and it just doesn't seem healthy to keep that up going straight into surgery. And, this week, I want to really buckle down and be as healthy as I can without actually restricting calories or being hungry. So, I've decided on a few rules for this week. Here goes... Diet: drink at least 8 big glasses of water per day cut out rice, pasta, bread, and potatoes (focus on protein and non-starchy vegies instead) replace b-fast w/a protein shake minimize sweets (eat yogurt or jello if I want a dessert) continue w/no alcohol Exercise: 45 minutes/day either walking outside or on the treadmill (normally I prefer to do Jazzercise, but I'm not supposed to for at least one month after surgery so I gotta get used to walking instead) Other: use my CPAP machine every night (I haven't been and my surgeon wants me to) practice using the spirometer gadget they gave us in pre-op class I think if I do all this I will be in good shape for sugery in a week. Wish me luck! :sneaky:

Its hard to believe my banding is only one week away now. I've been working on this ALL YEAR, literally. I decided in early December last year that I was going to pursue getting WLS and after 6 months nutrition visits, two denials, two appeals, and finally one APPROVAL, I am scheduled for Lapband surgery in exactly one week, 12/17!!! Ever since my approval, I have been feeling more optimistic about my whole life and have been making healthy changes to my lifestyle. My surgeon does not require a pre-op diet, though, so I haven't really buckled down or made any real rules for myself. The only exception being that I cut out alcohol last week. I love my wine and gin and it just doesn't seem healthy to keep that up going straight into surgery. And, this week, I want to really buckle down and be as healthy as I can without actually restricting calories or being hungry. So, I've decided on a few rules for this week. Here goes... Diet: drink at least 8 big glasses of water per day cut out rice, pasta, bread, and potatoes (focus on protein and non-starchy vegies instead) replace b-fast w/a protein shake minimize sweets (eat yogurt or jello if I want a dessert) continue w/no alcohol Exercise: 45 minutes/day either walking outside or on the treadmill (normally I prefer to do Jazzercise, but I'm not supposed to for at least one month after surgery so I gotta get used to walking instead) Other: use my CPAP machine every night (I haven't been and my surgeon wants me to) practice using the spirometer gadget they gave us in pre-op class I think if I do all this I will be in good shape for sugery in a week. Wish me luck! :tongue2:

Make sure you test your reaction at home.. I used to drink and could handle a lot of alcohol.. After bypass I tried wine, White Russians and vodka with crystal light.. It all went right to my head and made me feel awful. Some times I had no problem and could sip but other times I felt terrible.. I have decided to not drink since it was no longer enjoyable..