Search the Community

My SO is fit and trim. When we got together I was not skinny, but I wasn't fat either. When I started to gain weight a couple of years later it really bothered him, which made me feel bad and I think in some way contributed to my continuing weight gain (smart thinking there, tubby). We're still together but my weight has caused some major issues in our relationship. He just... does not find it attractive. And I don't blame him. But I do sometimes wonder, if I had more confidence... whether I would have stuck it out at all, whether I'd still be in the relationship. I honestly don't know. I think a big part of me felt that the negativity and judgement was well deserved on my part. I am looking forward to the day I weigh less than he does lol

You know, Sheryl, I do really find it amazing our much of the journey our minds play into it all. I believe someone said in one of the posts recently how crazy it is that we get down on ourselves with a small weight gain when we were OBESE before but I think maybe it also shows that we have turned the corner to true normalcy since I've heard others moan about having to lose weight and I would think, "Yeah, if I had that TEN POUNDS to lose..." ????. Now we are them! Ha! And Sheryl I agree on the visualization part too. 140 is an awesome number. I was Really Proud when I reached my goal of 150 the first time but boy, something about being 139-140 was truly Awesome! So awesome I just gradually slipped up and added too much junk back in and here we go again! BUT, what a great tool our sleeves have provided us! Got a fast day in today. Not pretty and not as low as I wanted (685) but I held on!!! Ha! And returning to good eating patterns feels really good too Glad we are all speaking up and helping each other out in the 5:2!

Speaking of "friends," I have one that KEEPS referring to me as someone with an eating/obesity problem. She knows nothing of the surgery, so it is as if she hasn't noticed that I have lost 50 pounds and am terribly fit. It seems I have moved on and she has not. She may prefer the fatter, more vulnerable and needy me. She was my friend through the hard times, so I need to find a way to understand, but not allow her to drag me down. I may be the opposite of what I am reading. My entire life I have been very social, until a rapid weight gain took me prisoner. It seemed an alien had taken over my body. To deal with the discomfort and shame, I avoided friends and poured myself into a new line of work, charity, and advanced education (to find self-worth that was not predicated upon my appearance or socially-acceptable weight.) Now that my weight/appearance/health are returning to "normal," I have begun to reahc out to the old friends. As was mentioned, the confidence to just be with anyone and focus on conversation is great. NEW TICKER MOVEMENT!!!

Dcprincess...often times I feel undeserving and it seems unreal that I have lost weight. I had an epiphany last week when I realized that "yes, I had lapband surgery but no one put an exercise band in me!" Really, the band has helped get me started but the continual success in exercise and fact that I continue to run in 90+ degree weather here in Texas is MY accomplishment and not because of that band of silicone. I like to mull over that from time to time. BTW I ran in Houston last weekend early in the morning and even at 0700 it was HOT. Way to go with your exercise down there! I had a strange experience several months ago. I was out with some friends in a club and was feeling pretty tipsy (not something I usually do anymore!) Well, I went into the bathroom and when I looked at the mirror I felt real strange. I hardly recognized myself. Surely it was the alcohol speaking but at any rate it was a freaky experience. I wonder if we have all failed to have good body images even before our weight gain years ago and consequently it was what got us to where we are today. I had a very good friend (also a shrink) tell me that I was ignoring my obesity because it protected me from being hurt by others. When I finally came to the conclusion that I could no longer continue to be overweight just the admission that I was truly morbidly obese was an extremely painful experience. I cried for days after I scheduled my surgery. I guess I was fearing losing another (in)effective coping mechanism. Dcprincess, have you ever thought of posting side-by-side pictures of yourself somewhere you can look at them on a regular basis? I just might try that myself....although I find looking at the former pictures very depressing. I just think of the years I put up with lugging all the weight around! Anyone else have any ideas?

I had Sutton 2006 I have gained about 50 back from the 130lbs that I lost. Any suggestions on losing weight at this point.

I'm so happy that your hubby's reservations have changed & am happy I could help with that Men are very visual creatures and it helps seeing another 'regular' person v's a model like we get bombarded with on TV weight loss commercials.... I think our failed attempts at those diets made our guys lose faith in the ability of things to work for us since we aren't models/actors.... and since the band is more scarey sounding than a normal diet (cause of surgery) as well as more expensive they get both scared and think we might be being 'conned' yet again... . plus they are our 'protectors', they love us and don't want us to feel like we have 'failed' again if it was just like one of those other diets. My BMI (i guess that's the only way we can compare being different heights) I think was 39 going into surgery, (sz.22 at millers, 20 at 16/26, medium at my size). I went to genesis for a month (where i seemed to be most peoples idea of their worst weight nightmare) and then switched to fernwood (heaps better!) and went religously once the doc cleared me for exercise and got the best runners for my feet (for me that was nike tn's at the time $249, now with current changed needs is nike shocks $199 but footlocker frequently have 30% off sales so you can get better prices - without the best shoes for your feet - and everybody is different - you wont be comfortable or have the same drive - i couldn't believe just how much difference the right shoes for my feet made).... it took ages for me to get restriction (literally - it was october 12th 2005 when I put my foot down and went to a different surgeon to get restriction to make sure I wouldn't gain my weight back because my motivation and will power was really stretched to the limit and I was sick of living on appetite supressants when I had a band - wasn't going to take t he 'waiting 8 weeks' between adjustments any longer, I had had this thing in me long enough it should be doing some of the work by now! - he gave me a huge fill (what i was suposed to have was not in there) and I finally knew what having a band was all about) but I persevered without much restriction those first 8 1/2 months and it took 10 months 13 days to get to 'healthy' bmi. With your attitude I know you will do it too!! I attribute my weight loss to my band because without my band I would not have had the motivation to actually lose all that weight - every other diet proved that - but every other diet didn't cost as much as the band (even if the band didn't do all or any of the work physically those first months just being in me brought out the tight ass in me that wasn't going to spend all that money and fail!). I did gain back nearly (shock!) 12kg when I lost that precious restriction and was hungry 24/7 like a rabid hyiena. A year had passed so it was to be expected; I saw my surgeon who didn't think it was a big deal since he still thought i was skinny and my bmi was still (barely) healthy and then I went back to that other surgeon again (i mean i didn't want to be gaining and crazy out of mind hungry) - he gave me an adjustment which took away my hunger - those 12kg melted back off once the hunger was gone. Therefore I know my band is the only reason I am still a normal weight - if that rabid hunger and weight gain continued i'd be obese again by now.... gut wrenching hunger regardless of how much you eat is the most awful thing.... the band squeezing the vargus nerve just right stops that which is a miracle. I eat a tonne more than most because I don't have a "tight" band like others describe..... I still get up in the middle of the night sometimes and have a piece of vegemite toast with my dog (now when I cook 2 pieces one is for me and one is for her.... before it was 2 each!) - other people hear that and I can see the pained look on their face as they imagine trying to swallow toast lol. The band is so individual, we all need it to work differently in terms of tightness for our lifestyle.

I have a very similar story. Lost about 85 pounds in about 14 months and then just stopped for about 2 and a half months. I also had an unfill in there which didn't help. I broke my plateau by cutting out all white flour and sugar, and counting strictly 1,000-1,300 calories per day, and exercising. Well, actually I'm not too good about the exercising part (only doing it about two or three times a week), but the other stuff has definitely helped. The first two weeks of this regimine I lost 6.4 pounds. Now I'm on week three, but I'm getting my period, and thus begins the monthly Water weight gain of between 3-5 pounds, which is so disheartening. But, I really think that my regimine is helping. I plan to resume white flour and sugar in limited portions, only after I reach goal.

I love the big brekies too, think that and the bread and the chocolate contributed to my weight gain!

Fat2flat: Take a breath ... you are relatively new to band life and still need to adjust. You say you don't want to lose quick, then the band is the right "tool" for you. You also say that you want to lose faster than you are currently losing ... but you don't say how much you've lost. It is likely that you have not yet reached your sweet spot, so more fills are needed along with diet and exercise. Are you consistently exercising? Have you made "lifestyle" changes where your food is concerned? The band is (for most, for a few the weight falls off like GB) a tool that works only as hard a you work. Please note that "hard" is a relative term, it doesn't have to be hard -- if you are willing and ready to change your life. The good news is that if you are not quite ready to jump into the deep end, but need to walk from the shallow to the deep -- you HAVE the band and it will be there when you get to the deep end. I have always been a slow loser, but I am still very happy with my progress. I had been banded a little over a year before I started exercising consistently. I have a number of health problems that prevent me from doing strenuous exercise, but i do absolutely everything I can -- because I want to reach my goal and I am WILLING to do what it takes. I have been in physical therapy for months building muscle to strengthen my spine which is riddled with a degenerative disease. My ortho says that the only way around this issue is building muscle to take on the work that my spine can no longer do. This is a win, win because you lose more weight when you have more muscle. I would first recommend that you let go of the frustration ... it will only distract you from achieving your goal (i.e., losing weight). As you are working your way to your sweet spot do little things to change your diet, things you can live with; so that when you get to your sweet spot you will have many lifestyle changes already in place. Pay attention to how foods effect you. Some people are very sensitive to carbs and have to stay away from them; others require a more balanced diet to lose weight. Find what works for you ... let this be your focus and before you know it you will be at your sweet spot with a great new lifestyle AND you will lose weight. YOU CAN DO THIS. Be kind to yourself and ... patient. This journey is individual and very personal. What works for one person may not work for another. mamastwo; hate to say this, but fills are really necessary. It took 7 or 8 fills before I was got to my sweet spot. If you don't have time to get your fills, you can't really expect the band to do it's part. Again, the good news is that you have the band and when you have time to get enough fills to get to your sweet spot, your band will do it's part to assist you with weight loss. Don't give up. Try to make yourself a priority in your life so you can work this band. Find the time for fills, exercise and consciously making time to prepare your meals. Don't let frustration overtake you .... that will only put you on a cycle to nowhere ... we've already done that and all we got for our troubles was weight gain. Move as slowly as you need to, but KEEP MOVING FORWARD. Be kind to YOU! All the best to you both on your journey. This is a great website, with great support. Make it happen in 2012!!! ~Fran

what is smartlipo?? ive had some problems with my arms getting saggy. ive never had big arms before my weight gain and now they are looking pretty awful. i dont want them looking this bad when i go on the cruise with my grand daughter... i want to swim a lot. so... what is smartlipo please

Angel thanks for the advise and input but I CLEARLY stated am looking for input about people that have had the DS, not advise on how to lose weight. And no offense but you are 7 months post op. thats when i was down to 129. it's easy....so easy at that time. Wait until you're almost 2 years out its a whole different ball game. Look at the weight gained since being sleeved thread that's pinned. There are dozens of us struggling with regain. It's annoying that people less than a year out think they know it all. I'm not trying to be rude but just wait and see how it is in a year, you may look back and realize you we're a little too cocky, just like 3/4 of the people here less than a year out.

Don't be so hard on yourself. Remember this is a mental change as well. Did you ever address the reason behind your weight gain, mind set, and eating habits? Like another poster said you acknowledged the situation but how are you going to cope in the future? Have a plan for holidays and get the crap out of your house. You got this!!!

#9 How I'm Keeping on plan: Some fear of weight gain keeps me on plan. I gain quickly and it's slow to come off. I log, exercise, keep motivational things on my fridge, set goals, and this challenge is helping. Thanks @GreenTealael Don't judge. Three months until Vegas. I'm going to see my sister in law on this vacation. At the beginning of my weight loss, she said to me " you know your just going to gain your weight back." 🙄 Anger is a great motivator to stay on plan. I hope to be in the low 130's for Mt Charleston.

Clients who regain weight after bariatric/weight loss surgery often ask us about the ‘5 day pouch test’. This much debated ‘test’ promises to ‘reset’ your stomach and help you lose more weight. It’s so popular in fact, it has its own acronym – the ‘5DPT’. So what’s the deal, is it too good to be true? Let’s start with a bit of background The pouch test was ‘created’ in 2007 by a fellow gastric bypass-er named Kaye. She struggled, like many, with discouraging and disheartening weight regain after bariatric/weight loss surgery. In an attempt to recreate that ‘tight newbie feeling’ again, she developed the pouch test. To start off the 5 day pouch test, she instructs you to ‘get back to the basics’. Or in other words, she wants you to return to the post-op liquid phase that is required in the first few days after surgery. She then recommends that you progress slowly from soft/puree protein, to firm protein and then lastly to solid protein (what’s the difference between firm and solid protein? We don’t know either...). Following this, you are supposed to feel a renewed sense of self. MYTH... The 5 day pouch test WILL NOT... - shrink your stomach - reduce hunger and increase satiety (feeling of fullness) - ‘reset’ your body - cut your cravings for carbs and sweet/salty foods FACT... We do however agree with some of Kaye’s suggestions. 1. Always delay your fluids from your solids foods. --> Stop drinking 15 minutes before your meals/snacks and wait at least 30 minutes after eating to start drinking again. WHY? - Drinking and eating at the same time ‘flushes’ the food out of your stomach too quickly. This causes you to feel hungry soon after eating. 2. Take your time to eat. --> Eating slowly and savouring your food without distractions increases satiety at meal times. WHY? - This gives your brain time to process that you are eating and lets you get the flavor fix you’re looking for. 3. Ask yourself if liquid protein snacks (aka ‘slider foods’) keep you full long enough (Ex. milk, yogurt, soft cheeses, cereal). --> While these foods are nutritious and provide good quality protein, they may not help you feel as full as you felt in the first few months after surgery. WHY? - These liquid foods spend less time in your stomach which is why you maybe feel hungry soon after eating. 4. Include a high protein food at every meal and snack. --> WHY? – High protein foods help keep you full longer. In our opinion, the ‘5 day pouch test’ is just another diet in disguise. Anything that promises to ‘reset your system’, ‘boost your weight loss’, ‘cut cravings’, ‘kick start your metabolism’, ‘burn fat’, etc. is unfortunately wishful thinking. There are no short cuts to healthy eating and lasting weight loss. There is only you, your pouch (i.e. your little stomach) and knowing how to use it! How do I know if my pouch is still small? Believe it or not, the majority of weight regain after bariatric/weight loss surgery is NOT related to having stretched your stomach. This is good news! In our experience, weight regain is more related to what you eat, the timing of your meals and snacks, and how you are eating. For example, if you feel comfortably full for 2-3 hours after eating the amount of food that fits on a bread plate, which includes a combination of protein, a small amount of grains, and some vegetables, your pouch is likely perfectly fine. We even asked one of our favourite bariatric/weight loss surgeons about the 5 day pouch test! Here is what he said: Need help? If you are looking to get back on track with your weight loss and healthy eating, sign up for our Get Me Back on Track package. Whatever the cause of your weight gain, we will give you realistic strategies and tips to tackle your triggers and barriers to healthy eating. Even simple changes to your home and office environments can make a big difference.

It is unfortunate that weight gain is a side effect with so many medications but you need the meds. Your choice on getting banded is not based on 1 year of weight gain, it is over time of playing with your weigh that has brought you to this choice. Keep moving forward in what is best for you and your health.

Well of course she did... After all... I am the good twin!!!! Kewl on the eDiets charts... I used mine from the last number of years there as well!!!! Hey... are you still a member there??? There is a support group under the WLS heading there that a gal named Sanda started and it was ALL about GBP/RNY. I barged my way in there and said that I thought it would be important for people to know that there is a safer option for those that can't "stomach" the idea of GBS. I whined when she went to other posts and did a promo for the support group without mentioning the Lap Band and she nicely added to the info. (o: I would love to have another pre-bander there... the dynamic pre-band duo!!!!!! Lets let all of those folks know that they have a safer option! I promise to be the evil twin if ya come and join me! Good luck with re-submitting the "proof" ... I didn't have all of my booklets from WW but I was able to get my old info from Jenny Craig and of course the LOOOOOOOG print out from eDiets showing my huge weight loss and then my HUGE weight gain. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you and hope we can still manage a bandarama with dates that are close! Okay... can only hold out another hour before I call... pretty soon I'll just be able to tell them my name and they'll be like... OHHHHH you again. (o: Darcy

Hi J, I think you are right that Sarah does not really seem ready or willing to get the weight off. She didn't really want to exercise either, although I can understand that at her weight it must be hard and painful. I think if she comes back she has more of a chance of changing her life. The home environment may have contributed to her weight gain in the first place. These girls like her and Cat ( Who looks amazing) are so lucky to have men that love them and care for them. I just figure at my weight that I can't find a man who would love me so I just hide because I fear rejection. I would like to find a special someone, because I don't want to be alone anymore, and I would like to have a baby because the clock is ticking. Right now it is all too hard to deal with for me. I have too much on my plate to be honest. Susannah

I don't know why I haven't seen this thread before but anyway... I'm here now. I really need something to get me back on track. The weight is not coming off as fast as I'd like it to and I have been stuck in the same 35# range since Thanksgiving. Do I cheat? Yes, sometimes. But I wanted the band to keep me from cheating or at least give me a punch when I tried to cheat. That is not easy after years and years of bad habits. I wouldn't say it was any one bad habit in particular, it was just negligence. Years went by and I realized one day that I had gained 150# in a space of about 10 years. All that time I did nothing to stop it. I guess I just kept making excuses and ignored the weight gain. It wasn't until health problems started occuring that I decided to do something about it. Now, I'm stuck yet hopeful. Maybe this thread and support from other men will help. I never had a goal weight but I remember a friend years ago told me that if I would just lose 30# she would be all over me 24/7. At that time my weight was the lowest I can remember at 235#. So I think 30# less and I will have my goal weight!

Hi Sarah, I have been reading thru your thread and am so sorry to hear about your difficulties! I hope things are a little better for you now...please don't get hung up on the water weight gain...you know as well as I that it is only water and will be gone shortly. What does Huy have to say about what has happened to you? Is is common? I really liked him a lot and am looking forward to having him for a surgeon. I know you are further North than I, the storms have passed and it actually a little brighter....Please take care of yourself and God Bless. Kimberly

Had VSG almost 2 years ago now. I'm down from a size 30/32 to a 12! I must admit within these past 3 months or so, it has been a war fighting against weight gain, and now my 12's are a little snug. I am determined to lose the 15lbs I've gained!! Ugh the fatgirl life!

Hi Flirtlass, I'm due to get my op on the 17 march. I just read that you have lost 4 and 1/2 stone since September, that just seems like a dream! I weigh 16 stone 12 at the moment and I'd be happy to get down to 11 stone 8lbs which will give me a BMI of 27 and then I can get a tummy tuck!!!!! I hate my tummy, after 6 kids, the last 2 were twins and weighted 7lb5 and 6lb13, my belly was enormous and has never been the same since! I put my weight gain done to being depressed about my belly, so to make me feel better.....of course I COMFORT EAT all the bad things of course! Do you mind telling me what you weighed when you started and how often you had fills. If you don't want to write it for all to see I can give you my email address. Reading all these chats from everyone is very inspirational and I am beginning to get excited! :bananalama: Although sice I booked my surgery my husband has started looking at expensive bikes, which is pretty worrying as this op is taking all our savings and the rest, I hope he doesn't think he can buy toys to the equivalent value on our credit cards!!!!!!!!:cheers2::present: Fatpants

What size band do u have cadence ? It wasnt until i got around 7.25 that i really felt some restriction, i got stuck still but woiuld get hungry in between meals and probably eat a little more than i thought i could. My surgeon at Nuffield Hospital says just be careful after a fill, they always do the water test fills then afterwards make u sit and eat a yoghurt before going home, but he doesnt really push for liquids only .. I eat 3 meals a day .. dinner in the evenings around 6 pm i try not to have any snacks at all of an evening just tea or coffee and use them as fillers during the day in between meals. I normally have some form of protein and 2 green veg, or a salad. I always start my dinner with a weight watchers tomato soup to stop me from eating too fast or too much as this makes me feel half full even before i start eating. The trick is to keep everything that you are supposed to do in your head and just tweak it to what works for you.. I know exactly what food i can and cant eat, what makes me heavier in the mornings when i weigh myself and u just have to keep plugging away at it. I do try and do as much exercise as i can as i would be a slow loser without it. I also eat food that supposidly helps speed up the metabolism like broccoli, green tea, asparagus, chilli etc i googled it .. I wouldnt lose much weight at all if i went over 1000 calories a day so i dont, i burn around 800 a day and include strength training which to me is a must to develop muscles enough to burn even more calories.. it works for me anyways, sounds like u still need your fills tweaking . My last fill was 0.3 and that works good for a while, i am back next monday for another small fill .. Good luck and dont give up .. i am sure if you wernet banded you would have put on weight maybe so the loss might not be much but in the grand scheme of things u have halted your weight gains

Whoop Whoop, post holiday weight gain has now gone and its back to tackling the last stone or two. I'm hoping to lose 1 stone by christmas. Freckles, I'm so pleased that your mum is getting stonger, it'll be a weight off your mind when you are on your holls. Love mmm

OMG i just wanted to say this could have been me that wrote this! I also have severe clinical depression, PCOS, asthma, eczema. The only difference between me and you is, im 26 and i dont have intracranial hypertension... as far as i know lol I was diagnosed with PCOS when i was around 15, at a family planning clinic. I kept going to get pregnancy tests because my periods had stopped, where before they had been very long and heavy. They did my bloods and it was confirmed. I never really knew what it was and never thought about it and any implications it would have on my life untill i started trying for children. (18 ) I started to research it and then everthing started fitting in to place. It explained the sudden weight gain in my teens, the erratic periods and the severe depression and mood swings. I went to my doctor and they just told me to go on the pill. Obviously i didnt take it because i was trying for a baby, and now im glad i didnt, ive read many things about the pill actually making PCOS worse. So since then i have been trying to reduce my weight, only managing a slight decrease and then it piles back in plus some and the facial hair is worse than ever. The doctors just kept sending me away with stronger and stronger anti depresants and ive tried just about every slimming pill and diet. So this time last year i was 25 stone and enough was enough. I started my research about surgery. I already knew that i wouldnt qualify for NHS funding and i wouldnt be able to afford it in this country so i started googling different places abroad. I read very good reviews about DR Chris, so started doing more research about him and i never ever came across a bad review about him. My mind was made up. I sent Fredrick an email and booked in for June, giving me enough time to save. 20th June i flew out and had the op on 21st and it was honestly the best thing ive ever done (mind you i dont think that while im hugging the porcelain ) The hospital puts ours thoughly to shame, everyone was so nice and it was so clean. I had my first fill in london in September 3ml and my second fill in wales in October 2ml. I dont think ive found my sweet spot yet but i dont want to rush to total restriction as many have done because i still like to enjoy my food but i have gained control. But due to the PCOS i need a little extra help so im doing slimming world as well since the begining of this year. Its coming off and staying off, i dont get hungry beween meals and i am satisfied with what im eating. I lost 3 and 1/2 stone in 6 months just with the band and i have lost 1 and 1/2 stone with slimming world. Im sure i will need another small fill soon, as the fat comes off from my internal organs the band will loosen. But at the moment im happy as i am. I lost 5lb this week Good luck on your journey but please remember that the band is a tool to help you its not a cure, you still have to work very hard and its definatly not a quick fix Jo x

Ok, so I'm really feeling down, and I thought you guys could cheer me up. It has been a crazy week for me as our exchange student got here from Switzerland, so that's been an interesting adjustment for us to go from no kids to a 17 year old. Anyways, what's really bothering me is that when I went in for my post-op appointment on July 25th, I was actually down to 239, which I was super excited. When I weighed myself this morning, I was back up to 245. I just don't get it. I know Aunt Flo is coming sometime this week, but that weight gain should only be a couple pounds. I'm not eating more than 1/2 cup at a time, but I'm not feeling full. And, I'm getting hungry again about an hour later. I am working out at least 3 days a week now, and walking the other ones when I don't go to the gym. I had to put my first fill a week later than it should be because the 2 surgeons alternate weeks for fills, and one of them is no longer covered under my insurance. So, I get to get my first fill on the 31st. I just don't know what to do or how to get over this hurdle. :help::help::help: But, I really feel down and out about it because I hate to see the scale going up. Of course, I'm sure Aunt Flo has something to do with my mood, but I know it's not everything.