Search the Community

I had gastric bypass 3 months ago, I want to wait atleast a year and 150 pounds to get pregnant again. But, last time I got pregnant I gained 70 pounds, then added an additional 40 pounds on top of that 3 years after. So, needless to say I'm super scared of that happening again, and regaining all the weight I'll lose before getting pregnant again. Anyone gain alot of weight with pregnancy, or not gain a lot of weight? Any suggestions on how to not gain a lot of weight, or to maintain their weight with pregnancy? I really want to have another baby before 40... (3 more years to go). Im so confused about this.

hello there just doing my monthly check in for those who are interested. So it's officially 8 months since I had my RNY BYPASS surgery. My journey has been good. Started high weight of 322lbs and I've been in maintenance now 2 months. I sit consistently around 165LBS most days but my lowest recent weight was 163lbs. I have definitely been enjoying alot more variety in my diet since maintenance began and I can tolerate most foods but still use shakes if needed. I am now consuming around 1500kcal most days even a few treats here and there without any side effects or weight gain. I'm feeling amazing and looking good. I'll be 36 in about 5 weeks but feel healthier than I have in 20 years!!! I am glad I did the right research and chose the BYPASS as my first and only surgery and I'm amazed how well I've done. never ever expected to lose 100% EBW but I've done it and my surgeon says I'm an anomaly only about 5% of his patients ever lose that much 😊 I know it's only early days and things might change in regards to malabsorption of calories and such but I'll be sure to keep an eye on my weight for the long term. I just want everyone to see it is possible to be successful and reach all your goals. you just have to be 150% focused on your goals from day 1. Thank you all and I'll appreciate any comments. Mike

We are all here in our own small way, to support each other . I truly value the input here as life changes (illnesses, deaths, divorces, and ok. Weight gains )keep happening and .... We have no choice but to deal with them head on! I send support to all my veteran friends who know how difficult the years get. ( i have a bit of indifference to those boasting about 3 month losses... yet I remember how good it felt to see the weight dropping) THIS is where I go to see the real, everyday struggles and achievements of my tribe. Fondly,

Sometimes the swelling will make you retain water.. It isn't uncommon to hear about weight gain immediately after surgery. Good luck! You are going to feel great in a few days

2 of my 3 children are prone to putting on weight but seem to maintain most of the time. They are now 20 and 18. My 15 year old is a skinny thing. Any way every so often one of them will complain about weight gain and talk about dieting - my reply is always - no diets , just cut out some of the junk and get out and exercise. I think this has worked quite well. I believe my weight gain got out of control from my mother putting me on every fad diet that came along and restricting all my food intake - this led to sneaking food and as i got older, instead of that one piece of cake with everyone else i would sneak off and buy a whole cake and then have to eat it all so i wouldn't be found out. With 2 kids prone to weight gain and one who is skinny i really believe genetics play a big role, cause i don't feed them any differently.

Isn’t the fat in keto meant to make you feel full for longer? Is it that our bodies can’t digest fat now, or that the fat is extra calories and possible weight gain?

Today I gained weight for the second time since I had the gastric sleeve surgery three weeks ago. I was 700 grams heavier today than I was yesterday, or 1,5 pounds. Last time this happened was a week after the procedure, when I gained 400 grams one day (a little under a pound) and then the day after I weighed the same as I did two days before. I weigh myself every day, and have done for a long time. I realise that weight fluctuations can happen, but I'm still a little shaken that they can happen when I'm only eating a few hundred calories per day. Yesterday, I ate around 800 calories, which is about the highest I've gone. Usually, I'm around 4-500 and not really hitting my protein target. I am hitting my water targets, so I'm not dehydrated. According to the UCLA Center for human nutrition, most people need at least 1200 calories per day just to survive, and eating less than 1000 is essentially starvation. So how can I gain weight on what is essentially a starvation diet? I'm not working out a lot, but I walk to and from work every day..

I've been married over 8 years and have 3 children, a daughter 7 years old, a son almost 4 years old and another son 19 months old. I work as a medical biller, get to work from home which you would think is great but it's really what help added to my weight gain.

So true the cleaner/healthier we eat our bodies hate junk /processed food. Yes the cruise will have good choices as well as for me I'm packing some Protein powder and bars for mine. I can't eat in the am until late morning so I Make protein lattes n back a bar for the excursions just in case. I found my band has been tighter the past few weeks and when I went for my annual check up he said it looked good but a but a tad tight and asked if I wanted an slight unfill I was scared about gaining weight do I sad no after a horrible weekend of not keeping much down I'm going Thursday to get a slight unfill just to make sure I won't be sick on my cruise. I already eat right and work out so a slight unfill hopefully won't cause weight gain . I think it's in my head so the first year was great I'm going to make the lifetime band living better than great so I'll take a few bumps as we adjust to living together forever . Lol not sure if it's the weather or some stress I'm going through (who doesn't have stres) but I must do what's necessary to keep my band and myself in sync with the help of my dr

Tami: I'm not taking votes here. I'm declaring that it's official. You're a dad-gumed freak. Enjoyed cocktails by the beach, great Mexican food, cerviche on the beach, partying in the bars with no weight gain for 7 days. It just ain't right. Musta been all that gettin' down you did on the dance floor. Seriously *jealous frown* way to go girl!

I love the big brekies too, think that and the bread and the chocolate contributed to my weight gain!

Hi everyone! Chrissy!! That is GREAT!! Congratulations!! 100 lbs gone! My goal is going to be to be below 200 lbs by my 1 year bandiversary on 1/26. Even with my current weight gain I think I can still do it. Ladybandido- it is such a slippery slope, isn't it! But it's still something we can conquer. Horsegirl, I laughed too after being done, it was just so gross! And since I really haven't been eating fast food in my car I had only the few napkins they'd thrown into the bag. It was all over my sweater and shirt. Super icky! Luckily it was just the clear stuff, ya know? LOL. Only here would I post this!!!! So I haven't been exercising like I was since Thanksgiving. I brought my stuff today and am definitely going to the Y at lunch, since I have to stay really late today- I need that time out of the office! I am reading that carb cycling book and it's really good- and I haven't even gotten to the carb cycling part! He talks about committing to yourself an integrity- keeping promises you make with yourself and how your mind has to rule your body. It's good stuff and speaking to me - helping me get back into my groove. Still have sinus issues going on, not really getting better but not worse. So I just have to power through! Everyone have a great day and just do it! Nicki

Hi I can relate to your story. I’ve been diagnosed with PCOS . I had my first child no problem but due to extra weight gain I’m not having regular periods and ovulation is difficult. I’m going to have sleeve operation in September/October loose the excess weight so I can conceive naturally

I'm 3 years post op this month. It doesn't seem possible as it went by so quickly. I have gained 20 pounds and never hit my goal weight. So with this extra 20 I'm 40 lbs away. I'm worried my pouch isn't working or I stretched it, which docs say hasn't happened. But I'm wondering if this pouch reset of going back on liquids is a real thing. I have no issues going to liquids and I only eat low carb. I'm confused on this weight gain and disappointed in myself. I have no doubt that I have screwed this up because I have cheated in the past. But getting this weight off is so much more important than eating things I'm not supposed to. Does anyone have a success story on gaining weight and losing it again or any ideas? I'm willing to do anything at this point. I don't experience dumping anymore at all and I have to take miralax daily for Bm's. Help!

I'm pretty nervous as well. Both scare me, but I'm more worried that they will delay my surgery when I get weighed during pre-op on Monday. I've had 9 months to lose as much weight as I can, and I've lost weight, gained weight and I believe right now I am only 3 pounds lighter than I was at my last weigh in this past April.

I just love all this re-defined confidence!!! TELLY: It's glad to see that your human!! I am sure that 3lb weight gain is lavishing toned muscle!! It sucks that if we venture out a little, we pay the price. Isn't slow metabilism great!! lol

This is a very interesting topic. There are so many factors that come into play with excess skin. However, one thing to keep in mind is to tend to it all of the time not just after VSG. Now, anyone who knows me personally knows I do have excess skin under my arms from weight gain and I know that is quite possibly the first place that will sag. However, I like to think that I can reduce the amount of sagging with proactive measures. Lubricate, hydrate, and nutrition. With lubrication most swear by cocoa butter but a cheaper way is to use of egg white washes. Obviously the attractiveness of egg white is because it is made of collagen and amino acids that absorb rather quickly into the skin. Once the egg white dries, (30 minutes) it flakes off and you are good to go. This is good for burned skin too to lessen burn scars. Cocoa butter is nice in that it is a creamy consistency that can be rubbed into the skin. Whichever you use, being proactive may minimalize the amount of excess skin.

When you are in the hospital, they pump you full of fluids. Which causes weight gain. They also pump gas in your abdomen during surgery. This all adds weight. It took me a couple of days when I got home, but it did come off.

I have no idea why I am fat other than too many calories and not enough expenditure? That should be a DUH answer but it is not that easy is it? I don't have any history of family abuse, abnormal relationships...anything which could triger unhealthy relationship with food. I have always been just under 140 lbs at 5'4" and when I hit that 140 mark it would trigger a panicked and rushed attempt to lose 5 pounds. My comfort zone was anything below 140. THAT was more than a decade ago. I did have one breakup ten years ago that I know hurt me and made me sad for a few weeks(normal??). I did notice a weight gain. I crept up to 160 and just didn't care. This next part will sound unreal but it is the truth for me(and some others??)--- I realized a year later that I was over 200 pounds. In 98 I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, my levels were within control after about six months. I had no significant weight loss while playing with my dose of Synthroid. A year or two later I was diagnosed with PCOS. Tried Glucophage and after six months of terrible bathroom visits I stopped taking that. The two diagnoses at forst gave me relief....therewas a REASON I was fat....a reason why it had become so friggin hard to lose weight. I know I eat well and do belong and actually go to a gym about 3 times a week. (I have to shake up my routine though because I only walk the tread and do some weights). In the last 9 years I have lost and gained the same 50+ pounds. I will not let either of the diagnoses be my reaons for failure. Do they make it harder to lose and keep weight off, YES. Do they make it impossible, NO! I have journaled(and been told I must be lying) my daily food intake. I have been away with friends and they see what I eat....and no loss. I think I eat too uch of the right things..I eat too fast. I'm thinking about LB I still don't know... Thanks for reading Susan

If you’re reading this post, you’ll probably agree that losing weight is one of the hardest things many people will ever do. After months or years of attempts to lose weight (and keep it off), you may be considering bariatric surgery. In 2011, the total number of bariatric surgeries performed in the U.S. was 158,000. By 2015, the number had increased to 196,000. Patients who undergo bariatric surgery and follow all treatment guidelines can expect to lose weight and improve the quality of their lives. More than 85% of patients lose and maintain 50% of their initial weight loss. This post is designed to focus on what I learned, sometimes the hard way. Some things you can’t find out in a doctor’s office, no matter how skille d a professional he or she is. What Your Doctor Can’t Tell You If you are considering bariatric surgery, you’ve probably done some research. You may have looked up “gastric bypass” on the internet, read some blogs, or perhaps you’ve gone so far as to discuss the possibilities with your doctor. You may have a decent grasp of the physical side of this surgery. But there are some things even the best surgeon can’t tell you. I’m talking about the emotional side of taking this life-changing step. The emotional roller coaster of trying and failing to lose weight does not disappear when you decide to use bariatric surgery to get control of your life. But, it does become easier when you know what to expect, and when you see that you are not alone. I speak with authority on the subject of bariatric surgery and the emotional struggle that goes with it — I’ve been there. Seven years ago, I had a gastric bypass. This process took me from being barely able to function to living a magnificent life as an authentic and productive person. But it wasn’t a walk in the park. As a person who has been through the surgery personally, and as a clinician (I am a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist) I bring deep experience to this subject. And I’m anxious to share what I learned. I want to make it clear up front that I am speaking as a clinician and someone who has been through weight loss surgery and the difficult recovery process — I am not a nutritionist or medical practitioner. The full tale of my own personal journey is recorded in my book Recovering My Life: A Personal Bariatric Story and in videos and Facebook posts I recorded during and after my surgery. I began emotional eating as a response to childhood trauma. And, though I had dieted over and over again since high school, I weighed over 200 pounds at the birth of my second child. At that point, my medical problems included sleep apnea, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and hypoglycemia (low blood sugar). By the time my third child was born, I was pre-diabetic, with gestational diabetes. Many days, I was too tired from sleep apnea to even get out of bed. I could barely take care of my kids, and I felt like the worst mom on the planet. Fighting My Way Through I had always thought only slackers had weight loss surgery. But when a friend had a gastric bypass, she convinced me that, for people with weight loss resistance, this was a good option. I consulted my doctor. He approved, and I began fighting my way back to health. And it was a battle. I made mistakes, but I learned from them, and I persevered. Today, I have maintained my weight loss, and I am healthy. I am a better mom to my kids, and I have a thriving group practice and run a nonprofit foundation I created to assist people in our community to heal the brokenness in their lives. And I met and married my second husband and have a great marriage. If you’re thinking about bariatric surgery, or if you’ve already had a procedure done, it’s important to move forward with all the information you need — including the physical and emotional ups and downs. My recovery was a difficult journey, but I would do it again a million times over. Knowing what I know now wouldn’t eliminate the challenges I had to overcome before and after surgery. But, it would make the whole thing less scary. That’s what I hope my story does for you — help you avoid the mistakes I made and feel more confident in your success. Understanding Weight Loss Struggles & Bariatric Surgery Causes of Morbid Obesity What is Bariatric Surgery? Getting Ready for Surgery Mental & Emotional Preparation Advocating for Yourself After Surgery is Approved Building Support Planning Pre-Surgery Weight Loss What You Will Need Immediately After Surgery In the Hospital The First Few Days at Home Ongoing Recovery Physical Issues Emotional Issues Other Issues Potential Issues After Weight-Loss Surgery Emotional Challenges Health Problems Relationships Understanding Weight Loss Struggles & Bariatric Surgery Why Do People End Up Morbidly Obese Well-meaning acquaintances, friends, and relatives may suggest that you’re “taking the easy way out” by pursuing bariatric surgery. They can make you feel guilty for even considering this as a last resort. Why can’t you just lose the weight on your own? Genetic predisposition. Some are genetically predisposed to gain weight, even when they exercise, even when they try to diet. Certain hormone imbalances and disorders can also make it hard to stay at a healthy weight. Emotional eating. The barrier that keeps most morbidly obese people from losing weight is that our eating is connected with our emotions. Early on, many of us learned to use food as a way to cope. Food for us is not just fuel; it’s the way we deal with life’s problems and blows. Regardless of the particular cause, some of us have been on one diet or another all our lives. We have lost the same 50, 70, or 100 pounds over and over. In fact, our attempts to lose weight have made us worse off. Along with the health effects of too much weight, we carry the shame of failure and frustration. Weight and Your Wellbeing The physical health problems associated with obesity are many and serious: high cholesterol, high blood pressure, acid reflux, gall bladder disease, congestive heart failure. Type two diabetes, hypoglycemia, asthma, sleep apnea and other sleep problems, fertility problems, arthritis, lack of energy. Knee and back pain, gout, migraines, psychosocial stress. Even scarier: liver disease, increased risk of cancer, risk of stroke, and earlier death. Associated emotional problems that stem from these conditions can also make it harder to overcome them. For example, you may be struggling with depression, anxiety, and guilt. Sometimes, the biggest problem we have to face is the low self-esteem that goes along with being the biggest person in the room. What Is Bariatric Surgery? Bariatric surgery is not a cosmetic procedure. We may hope to look better after losing weight, but the best reasons for undergoing this major surgery are to extend and improve our lives. The common term for bariatric surgery is “weight-loss surgery.” It means any surgical procedure on the stomach or intestines that aims at weight loss. Doctors have been performing these surgeries since the 1950s, with a good success rate. The most common procedures are lap band, with a success rate of 47%; gastric sleeve, with a success rate of 80%; and gastric bypass, which has an 85% success rate. Another procedure, duodenal switch, has a success rate of 95%, but is more complicated and less common in the U.S. These procedures support weight loss while requiring lifestyle changes. Drastic weight loss can motivate you to keep on the road to better health. Whichever procedure you choose, pre- and post-operative education is key to developing lasting, healthy habits. Getting Ready for Surgery Mentally and Emotionally Preparing Convincing others — and yourself — this is the best solution Your first job is to conquer your own hesitance about weight-loss surgery. Even asking about it takes courage. Then, when you’ve reached the point of seriously considering it, you need to be prepared for a long haul. You will need to get lots of people on board with your decision. First, your family — maybe not extended family, but certainly the people you live with day to day. Next, you need your doctor to approve your decision. No matter how much you hate to get weighed, you will need a referral from your primary physician. And, you need to convince your insurance carrier that bariatric surgery is necessary for your health and to prolong your life. Navigating Relief and Fear You will probably feel a profound sense of relief just to know there’s a solution to obesity- related health problems. But along with that relief comes worry. It’s major surgery. Things could go very wrong. You might even die. Will having surgery be worth it? What if you can’t get the weight off during those post-surgery months? What if you can’t keep it off and all this trouble and pain is for nothing? After all, you’ve tried and tried to lose weight and it hasn’t worked — or only worked for a short time. Then there’s having to consult with medical personnel and, even worse, insurance representatives, to advocate for yourself. You’ll have to talk about your weight, which means confronting the shame that goes with it. You may worry that people will think you’re weak — that you’re taking the easy way out. How do you overcome that prejudice? Especially since part of you still shares it. Overcoming Resistance And what about all those hoops you have to jump through? You have to have at least six months of records showing your weight on a regular basis and detailing your attempts to lose it. When you can’t bear the sight of your own body, much less the weight on the scale, how are you going to face that challenge? Your research, from articles to videos, shows people who’ve had bariatric surgery eating impossibly small portions. You hear about all the restrictions ahead: first, a liquid diet; then mashed food; then, even when you get back to “normal,” ongoing restrictions, such as not drinking with meals. How will you ever be able to eat normally again — how will you ever be able to eat out? These are mental challenges it won’t be easy to meet. But if you want to be well again, if you want a long, productive life, it is possible to work through them. Advocating for Yourself I was fortunate that my primary care physician was willing to support my bariatric surgery decision from the beginning. But you may have to work to convince your medical advisor that this route is good for you. Advocating for yourself isn’t easy, especially if, like most of us who suffer from morbid obesity, you don’t like calling attention to yourself and your weight. To succeed, you must learn how to speak up for yourself. Here are some suggestions. Decide what you want. Believe in yourself! Know the facts. Educate yourself about bariatric surgery and potential issues. Plan. You need a strategy for recovery and ongoing lifestyle changes. Gather support. It’s helpful to have family, friends, and people who have similar issues on your side. Target your efforts. Find the best medical practitioner. Find the right person at your insurance company to plead your case to. Express yourself clearly. Tell doctors and insurance agents that you are interested in surgery and why you feel you need it. Stick to the point, and don’t give up if they say “no.” It may help to role play scenarios with a friend or family member who supports your decision. Assert yourself, but don’t lose your temper. Respect the rights of others, but ask for what you need, and then listen. Finally, don’t give up. Be firm and persistent. Follow through on what you promise. (Those six months of weight-loss records, for example.) After Surgery Is Approved You’ve made the decision to have bariatric surgery. You’re both excited and scared about taking this serious step toward improving your health and your life, but you’re going to do it. Now you need to build your support system. Nobody goes through such a major life change, such a serious physical challenge, without help. Find Your Team Choosing the right people to support you on your journey is one of the most important decisions you have to make. You will need to depend on family, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers who have gone through this experience before you. The most important quality to look for in your team is respect and support for your decision. You will need help with ordinary tasks and responsibilities while you are undergoing and recovering from surgery. A few needs: Someone to care for your children and pets while you’re in the hospital and perhaps during recovery at home Help cooking meals and cleaning the house Someone to accompany you to the hospital and be your advocate when you can’t do that yourself Help dealing with the inevitable emotions and stresses of major surgery and a major lifestyle change First, you have to overcome your reluctance to ask for help. Then, you have to reach out. Share your needs with family and friends who are sympathetic to your goals. If they’re not on board, you don’t have time for them right now. If it feels right to you, you can use social media to reach out. Contact your church, work friends, fellow hobbyists, and people you’ve come to know in other ways. Trust that there will be someone who can help. Be Informed and Follow Your Doctor’s Advice Use the resources available through your medical advisors. Seek out a sympathetic nurse. A therapist can help you deal with the emotional consequences of surgery and also the issues that led to your obesity in the first place. If you don’t have a therapist, maybe it’s time to make that connection. Find a good therapy group. And above all, follow your doctor’s advice! Learn as much as you can about what will be happening to your body and mind, but trust the experts. Plan for an Extended Recovery Your time in the hospital may be only three to four days, but it will take longer for you to feel “recovered.” The period (about nine months) when you are relearning how to eat and coming to terms with the smaller size of your stomach is crucial to your long-term success. There will be lots of ups and downs. Be ready for a long road to full recovery. Having support from friends and family is important, but this is the time to get involved with a support group. Being with others going through the same experience can give you the perspective you need to keep going. Even if your physical recovery is swift and relatively painless, you will have to learn how to deal with the changes in your life. If, as with many, food has been the way you deal with past trauma, uncomfortable feelings, your need for independence, or any other of life’s problems, you no longer can depend on that comfort. If food has been your addiction, you now have to kick the addictive response to it. There will be setbacks. You need to be prepared to bounce back from them. Lose Weight Before Surgery Your bariatric surgeon is likely to require you follow a weight-loss plan for a number of months (six is common) before surgery. The reasons: to make sure you really are committed to your goal of losing the excess weight, and to help you be as healthy as possible going into surgery. This can be a frustrating time. You’ve tried so many diets and exercise programs before, and none have worked. You hate thinking about your weight, and your program requires you weigh yourself daily and keep records of your weight, food intake, and exercise. You’ve made a major decision and are anxious to get it over with. But again, following your doctor’s advice is the shortest and best way to reach your goal, no matter how frustrating it feels. Confront Your Fears To make this transformative decision, you’ve already had to overcome lots of fears. Some of your fears involve others’ opinions. “What will people think?” Some arise from self-doubt. “Am I being selfish?” These are not frivolous concerns. Believe in yourself and face them. Your decision to take care of your health so that you can be there for your loved ones is a good one. Trust in yourself. Another very real fear is the fear that anyone feels when they are about to undergo major surgery. You could die. This is not a frivolous thing. It’s serious. But the vast majority of people who have surgery don’t die from it. So, face your fear realistically. At last, the big day is here. Your surgery is performed. You wake up in the hospital. Are you a different person? Is it all over now? Not yet. The journey of recovery has begun, and it will take resilience. Immediately After Surgery In the Hospital If you have built your support team, you will have fewer worries going in. Your family and home responsibilities are covered, and you have people to support you in the hospital and after you return home. But that doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges. During the initial stages of recovery, hospital staff will be checking your blood pressure, oxygen levels, and more. You may feel as though you are always being poked and prodded at, with little privacy. Thankfully, this stage doesn’t last forever, Your doctors will advise you about the physical challenges that may follow bariatric surgery: constipation, dumping syndrome (nausea, vomiting, and weakness caused by eating high sugar meals, sodas, and fruit juices), possible infection of the wound, and possible leaks in the new connections. But medical advice may not give you the information you need about the emotional side effects. One consequence of the surgery I noticed immediately: I no longer felt like eating. My hunger hormones were gone for a period of time. I had to force myself to eat, and I felt weak. Others report that they felt hungry during the post-op period while on a liquid diet. Hungry or not, a liquid diet can be a source of emotional stress. Be aware that different people react in different ways. The important thing is to keep following your medical and nutritional advice and trust that, in time, you’ll be feeling more normal. Another potential problem is “food grief.” Food has a special meaning for people who suffer from morbid obesity, and “mourning for lost foods is a natural step in the re-birth process after weight loss surgery.” For a long time, maybe all our lives, food was our friend. We turned to it in celebration, in sadness, for comfort, for reward. Now, we can no longer turn to food. We have to find other ways to fill the void food once filled for us. Along with the pain associated with surgery comes the challenge of managing it. The pain medication you are given in the hospital may not work for you. Keep advocating for yourself until you find one that does. It may also take time to know exactly how much medication you need. Trust your doctor, but don’t be afraid to ask for a higher dose if you are in pain, or a lower dose if you are experiencing other unpleasant side effects. It’s worth reiterating here, I am not a nutritionist or medical practitioner. And, I am certainly not advocating for you to ignore your doctor’s advice. Rather, by telling your doctor how you feel when you’re on pain medication, he or she may be able to transition you to a more effective medicine or dosage in a safe, supervised way. Other challenges: meeting the medical requirements for discharge from the hospital and meeting your own fears and expectations. Will you be ready to be sent home? How will you manage after you get there? Your First Few Days at Home Your first major challenge will be dealing with pain and managing your pain medication. If you’re like me, you will want to get off medication as soon as possible. But follow your doctor’s advice. Pain meds usually require tapering off. Quitting “cold turkey” is likely to cause withdrawal symptoms, such as feelings of anxiety or depression, trouble sleeping, headaches, night sweats, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. I made the mistake of not tapering off my pain meds and lived to regret it. You — and members of your family — might be appalled at how little you eat. You might worry about not getting enough of the right nutrition — protein, for example. The combination of pain, medication, and lack of hunger hormones can mean almost total loss of appetite. Feeling responsible for things at home may make you push yourself too hard, especially if loved ones need you. Preplanning for getting help during this early recovery period is important. You will need to have both physical and emotional support in place. Recognize that even though they care, some people won’t be able to help. But don’t be afraid to ask. Take baby steps. Your recovery has many facets: overcoming pain and regaining your physical strength are just the beginning. Emotional adjustment to the new circumstances of this life-changing step is major and ongoing. Therapist Lynne Routsong-Wiechers, herself a successful bariatric surgery patient, lists “Seven Steps to Improving Emotional Adjustments Post-Surgery” in her article, “Baby Steps — Emotional Adjustments to Weight-Loss Surgery.” Follow your doctor’s orders. Ask questions when you have them and express concerns, but trust your doctor’s recommendations and prioritize your physical health. Keep a journal. You can use this to keep track of the foods you eat, as well as whether or not you are emotionally eating, but you might also choose to express what you’re thinking and feeling. This will be a private record, just for you. Remember, you are more than your diet and weight. Write down realistic goals and expectations. Celebrate when you meet them! Reflect on the past. Remember why you decided to make this change, and honor how far you’ve come. Take plenty of photos and keep your old clothes. This will help you physically see your immense transformation. Call on that support team you’ve created. Look forward to living life to the fullest! Ongoing Recovery Physical Issues Even after you’ve conquered the first few days after surgery, the challenges go on. This early recovery stage can last from one to six weeks. The specifics vary with the particular procedure, but here’s a general outline of your physical recovery: Develop strategies to deal with these attacks: exercise, journaling, and deep breathing are a few suggestions. Seek help if your attacks are severe. Focus on One Part of Your Body You might find yourself focusing on one body part. For me, it was my double chin. I had lost inches from my waistline and was making good progress, but when I looked in the mirror and saw that same double chin, I felt like I was making no progress at all. This kind of body image distortion, if it becomes obsessive, can lead to Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), a mental health disorder. People with BDD can spend hours a day obsessing about their appearance. These obsessions and the low self-esteem that results can make them avoid social situations, have problems at work or school, or even lead to suicidal thoughts or suicide attempts. It’s important to seek help and support if you feel yourself becoming fixated. Remember that no body is perfect, and people are much more like to think about their own “flaws” than notice yours. Practice positive self-talk and try to replace thoughts about your body with something else, such as a new hobby or activity. Now that you’ve lost weight, a whole new world is open to you! Health Problems It’s not uncommon for patients to regain some weight after surgery, although it’s a myth that many patients regain all their lost weight. Regaining Weight Regaining even a small amount of weight can feed your fear. What if you stretch the pouch and end up gaining weight back or stalling your weight-loss? What if you have to go back to the hospital for something and you gain weight because of the treatment? About half of all bariatric surgery patients regain weight after two years. But the average regain is about 8% after reaching the lowest point, and total ten-year excess weight loss is still over 50%. The main reasons for regaining weight are: how much excess weight you carried before surgery, alcohol or drug abuse, lack of a support system, or having a psychological problem or food “addiction.” Realize that even if you regain some weight, you are still healthier than you were before surgery. Take steps to avoid the main reasons for weight gain. Be aware of the dangers of a substitute addiction to alcohol or drugs. Get yourself a support system and use it. Get treatment if you suspect you are overeating because of food addiction. Plateauing Don’t lose hope if you stop losing weight for a few days. These things happen. You can overcome the weight loss plateau. Your metabolism may have slowed because you couldn’t exercise after surgery. You can start losing weight again. Focus on getting the right amount and intensity of exercise. Track your heart rate. You should be exercising at 60 to 85% of your maximum heart rate (220 minus your age). Vary your exercise routine to keep yourself challenged. Be sure to drink enough water, and continue eating right. Complications I worried that something would get stuck in the very small connection between my stomach pouch and small intestine. Would I have to go to the emergency room? Could something else happen to me? As with all surgeries, there can be complications with bariatric surgery. But this surgery is very safe (99.8% survival rate). And less than 10% of patients have a complication. Though the list of complications is fairly long, most are not life-threatening (e.g., indigestion, diarrhea or constipation, nausea and vomiting, dumping syndrome). Some can be prevented by self-care. Stick to your bariatric diet, follow your doctor’s instructions, inform yourself about what to look for, and share your worries with your doctor. Sutures I had difficulty with sutures coming out before they were supposed to. Others have had infections at the wound site. Monitor the site of your surgery and consult your doctor if things aren’t going right. Hypoglycemia Hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) happens when after eating, a rise in blood sugar makes your body produce more insulin, which then lowers blood sugar. Unless it’s extreme, this can be managed by changes in your diet. Nutritional Deficiencies Common vitamin and mineral deficiencies among bariatric surgery patients are Vitamin B12, Folate and Zinc, iron, copper, Calcium, and Vitamin D. Potassium deficiency can also be a problem, causing nausea, cramping, and dry skin. Supplements may help. Consult your doctor and dietician. Dehydration The recommended daily intake of water — 64 ounces — may be hard to get down, particularly right after surgery. Eight cups sounds like a lot, but if you break it down to one-fourth cup every 15 minutes for eight of the twelve or so hours you are awake, it is manageable. There’s an app for reminding you when to drink at GetHYApp.com. Clothing Especially in the early weeks and months after surgery, when you are dropping weight fast, you may find you can’t find anything to wear. This may sound like a minor problem, but you might be caught off guard by how much you spend on new clothes as you lose weight rapidly. While you are changing sizes every week or two, you may want to find some ways to save money: Borrow clothes or shop at thrift stores. Shop your closet. Now’s the time to wear those too small items you just couldn’t part with when you were heavier. Don’t buy too much. Get exactly what you need until the next size change. Buy just a few practical basics and splurge on accessories. Don’t buy for the future. Clothes that fit and flatter now are better for your confidence. Alter. If you can’t alter your own clothes, find someone who can and get items altered as you lose weight. Most things can be taken in. Exchange Clothing. If you’re in a support group, consider swapping clothes with other group members. Relationships Social Life Your new body may allow you to make new decisions: to start dating or to go to the beach. But because your body image may not have caught up with the reality of your new body, you may still have the self-doubts you had before. Part of your mind still thinks the way you did before surgery. You may feel unattractive, even invisible. Inside, you still feel fat. Negative self-talk may still be your go-to response to interacting socially with other people. Counseling, a support group, and self-affirmations can help. Most importantly, give yourself credit for all you have accomplished. You’ve come a long way. Different Reactions Sad, but true. Not all of your friends and family will react positively to the new you. Old friends, even family members, may envy or resent your new look. Family, friends, and even strangers may have a range of reactions to the changes in you. Your children may support you, but carry a lot of anxiety, fearing that you may die. Some may become diet police, worried that you’ll regain the weight and ill health of your days of obesity. Some will trust you to know your own needs. Know that others’ reactions don’t mean anything about you. You are taking care of yourself, and that’s a good thing. Getting More Attention Now that you have lost weight, you are probably getting more attention. This may make you uncomfortable. Obesity goes with isolation. In fact, some people use their weight to keep from being in the spotlight. Being noticed may be flattering, but it can also be stressful. Jealousy If you’re married or in a relationship your significant other may be jealous of all the attention you’re getting from other people. Your spouse might fear that the new you might leave the relationship and so may try to sabotage your efforts to maintain your weight loss. Your overweight friends might be jealous in a different way. If monthly dinners out with your “foodie” friends were the main thing that kept you together, or if these friends are not sympathetic to your weight loss efforts, they may, consciously or unconsciously, sabotage you. Remember to surround yourself with people who support you. Don’t judge others who may be struggling, but don’t sacrifice your progress to please them. Guarding Against Judgment The different way strangers and acquaintances perceive you now may make you feel flattered, but also confused and even resentful. You may wonder — do these people like you for yourself, or are they just attracted to your new appearance? Would they have liked you before? People you don’t see every day may not recognize you. Others may make you feel that you’re being judged for your decision to have the surgery. You may be re-introducing yourself to one person and defending yourself to another. It’s understandable that you may be struggling with your sense of self. But, remember, you are worthy of kindness at any weight. Be your own best support. Honoring Your Accomplishment You can’t control the beliefs and behavior of other people, but you can be true to your goals and to yourself. Keep honoring your decision, your hard work, your determination, and your truly astonishing accomplishments. Whatever others say or imply, you are a brave and magnificent person, and you deserve a magnificent life. Embrace Your Future Bariatric surgery is a last-resort choice for losing weight that is killing you. Deciding to go ahead with it and working through all the barriers and difficulties is not for the faint of heart. But for those who choose to go forward, it can be life-saving in many ways. By arming yourself with information about what to expect, you can feel prepared to navigate the weight loss surgery process with greater confidence and ease. Keep coming back to this guide and check in with yourself at every step along the way. Before, immediately after, and long after surgery, remember these key points: Create a support system Take care of your body Believe in yourself No matter where you are in your surgery journey, you deserve the new life you have given yourself. Enjoy. Links https://asmbs.org/resources/estimate-of-bariatric-surgery-numbers https://obesitynewstoday.com/gastric-bypass-success-rate/ https://www.caroladkisson.com/books/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/feeling-hungry-less-than-a-week-after-gastric-bypass-surgery-is-this-normal.html http://www.boxingscene.com/weight-loss/54558.php https://www.consumerreports.org/health/avoid-withdrawal-symptoms-from-prescription-painkillers/ http://www.obesityaction.org/educational-resources/resource-articles-2/weight-loss-surgery/baby-steps-emotional-adjustments-after-weight-loss-surgery https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/bariatric-surgery-recovery.html#Support_Main https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/bariatric-surgery/basics/what-you-can-expect/prc-20019138 https://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/239270-joint-aches-and-pains/ http://www.mybariatriclife.org/chronic-fatigue-after-bariatric-surgery/ http://www.livestrong.com/article/456678-feeling-cold-all-the-time-after-a-gastric-bypass/ https://www.leaf.tv/articles/how-to-avoid-skin-problems-after-gastric-bypass/ https://www.webmd.com/diet/obesity/features/you-lost-weight-what-about-extra-skin#2 https://www.drdkim.net/ask-the-dietitian/understanding-hair-loss-after-bariatric-surgery/ http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ http://www.bmiut.com/mood-changes-bariatric-surgery/ https://www.njbariatriccenter.com/eating-out-after-weight-loss-surgery/ https://www.bariatriceating.com/2013/11/what-medications-are-off-limits-after-my-bariatric-surgery/ https://www.everydayhealth.com/weight/the-emotional-health-risks-of-bariatric-surgery.aspx http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ https://www.tijuanabariatrics.com/blog/2017/04/18/is-a-ketogenic-diet-safe-181655 https://www.ucsfhealth.org/education/dietary_guidelines_after_gastric_bypass/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/weight-gain-after-gastric-bypass.html#Diet-and-Life-After-Main http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ https://weightwise.com/avoid-body-image-distortion-weight-loss-surgery/ http://bariatrictimes.com/depression-after-bariatric-surgery-triggers-identification-treatment-and-prevention/ http://blog.riversidesurgicalweightloss.com/blog/manage-anxiety-after-surgery https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/related-illnesses/other-related-conditions/body-dysmorphic-disorder-bdd https://asmbs.org/patients/bariatric-surgery-misconceptions https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/weight-gain-after-gastric-bypass.html https://mybariatricsolutions.com/overcoming-and-preventing-the-weight-loss-plateau/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/complications-of-gastric-bypass-surgery.html#General_Safety-Main http://gethyapp.com/ https://weightwise.com/how-to-shop-for-clothes-after-weight-loss-surgery/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/marriage-family-strangers-after-weight-loss-surgery.html

My surgeon did not set a goal weight for me. He just told me to expect to get to around 160-170 lbs by my one year anniversary. I personally initially chose 120 because it was in the middle-ish of the healthy BMI range for my height. Decided to stop at 127 instead because I was thinking I was getting too small. I'm at 114-ish today. Go Figure. Edit: Adding that I also have an arm lift scheduled for mid-December (which I booked/placed deposit on almost 2 months ago)..I will be about 14 months post op come surgery day. My PS surgeon at the time of consult told me that a weight loss of 10-15+ lbs is more problematic than the same amount in weight gain after surgery. I've lost 13 lbs since I saw him last, and I am thinking I may gain that back as part of the regular bounce back after getting to lowest weight. I see him again in September, we'll see what he says then.

I've been taking Zoloft for over a year and didn't notice any weight gain. I took Prozac before Zoloft and it caused hair loss. I love my Zoloft and how much better I feel mentally. I believe everyone's body reacts differently to anti-depressants. You'll have to figure out what works for you. They have been a life saver for me. 🙂

Julie: Thanks for letting us hear from you. I have been on antidepressants off and on through the years and when you need them you need. My internists actually recommend them at my last visit because I have so much anxiety right now. I think it's temporary due to my upcoming PS and DD's wedding in May. It really scares me to think about going back on anti-depressants because of weight gain. How has your experience been with this aspect of it? Take care!

Yeah-I heard you are very sullen after-and should wait a week. I was just sleeved on the 14th discharged on the 16th. For the entire time I was there they had LR running at 125 ml/hr. That is 6 liters if fluids in a very short amount if time. That will add to the weight gain post surgery along with being swollen. I too weighed 4 pounds more then when I went in. I started at 360 was 335 at the start of my 2 week preop diet. Surgery day 314... Couldn't help myself but weighed myself when I got home and was 319, but just now I weighed myself and I was 309. I have been walking and drinking fluids but everything tastes yucky. Although today I ate some strained cream soup and sf chocolate pudding with protein added. Eating some "regular foods" has made things taste a little better.

I had my operation on 12/17 and stalled this past week where I would lose a pound one day, then gain a half pound the next etc. I got on the scale yesterday and it dropped 2 pounds and today I lost another 1.5 pounds. Go figure??? Weight loss has never been linear for anyone (neither has weight gain). It's all about trends and, for once, it's finally "trending" in the right direction. Today is my first day back to work since the surgery and it's been very strange. It seems like everyone in my office knows, but they have been very supportive (at least as far as I can tell). Still, I am suffering from a little brain fog that I didn't notice since my brain power wasn't an issue when I wasn't in the office. It was nice being home and being able to focus 100% on recovery. Now, I am back in the real world and it's not all about me and my weight loss efforts anymore. Anyone else struggling to adjust to getting back to work and the "real world"?