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Had my first major outing today. My boyfriend and I decided to take a little road trip to a snowy mountain town about 4 hours away. I drove and by about hour three had a fair amount of back and abdominal pain. Got to the hotel and took some Tylenol and laid down for a min, then hit the town! The walking around was fine and the not eating was manageable, but I really felt sad that I couldn't enjoy an adult beverage with my honey. It didn't even sound good! Thinking back now, a lot of our road trips and outings include alcohol. I used to be very into wine tasting! I know it won't be this way forever, but I did feel a little regret in terms of losing that part of my life. My life doesn't revolve around booze (please no Addiction accusations) but I'm young and we used to Include it in a lot of the things we would do. I look forward to someday being able to enjoy a glass of wine with him. Moderation! Anyway, I had French onion soup (sans bread and cheese) for dinner, and slept like a baby. We head home today and although I'm not looking forward to driving, I'm pretty happy it was a successful trip.

About 2 years ago, there was a small group of people who were all getting banded the same month...they decided to break away and start their own private facebook group....they wanted to be of a single mind with a single goal, and felt this forum was too confusing with people in all different stages of this journey...not to mention the negativity...the group grew to around 100 people..ALL being banded within the same month or so....ALL moving forward at the same pace. As a group, they decided early on they needed a few Veterans in the group to give advice and hints based upon experience....so they hand picked 2 or 3 from this forum...I was one of those invited.... The group was very productive and very tight knit, planning reunions here and there......it was fun to see and watch them, as a group, enter and pass through the different stages...such as their first fill...or bandster hell...or their first stuck episode.... I remember once they were all talking about how they loved Sushi,,,,I mentioned something which none of them understood...but sure enough 6 months later I was asking...."What...no one eats Sushi anymore? What happened?" The group was so good, everyone started to invite others to join with good intentions...and it grew and grew in numbers....it slowly became a microcosm of this forum, with people at all different stages...some just starting out, some just considering the surgery...and yes, negativity and some friction between members started, with some quitting having their "Feelings" hurt, or insulted........it slowly became confusing, not knowing where someone was in their journey, making it difficult to give advice...again, there are some things beginners will not, and cannot understand yet....so I no longer knew what to say to who, and started to keep my mouth shut when a topic came up such as "Alcohol" and the band....for some people it is better not to hear what I think....even if it is from experience... Long story short though....NONE of those people ever came back to this forum...they ALL left...I do see one, maybe 2 now and then, but that's about it....the "Core" of that original group are all happy, met their goals, and many of them moved on from that group....and of course, statistically, a few never found that compatibility with this, and had their constant struggles. It's just the way it is...you can't be responsible for what others think or feel, whether they have interest in staying or leaving...it just happens...it's natural...it's happened before, it's happening now, and will happen in the future....it will always be that way. It happens....it's a big world and this IS the internet after all....

Sorry I hit some key and it post the Hi... don't know which one...every site is different and I not a quick learner. I had total knee replacement of both knees 45 lbs ago. My knees surgery was wonderful no pain afterwards, none. Now I am back to pain because of the 45 lbs. The doctor either wants you to lose weight or you are way too young. My daughter is way too young and she is definitely not overweight but our doctor will not replace her knee. I don't know how old you are so it may be age, knees can only be replaced once. I am in this forum to read about your experiences before and after surgery. I am just starting my journey ... ooo hate that word.. but that is what this is a journey into the unknown for me. What is this pre-surgery diet? I have not seen a doctor yet. I am still trying to figure out where to have the surgery, guess I could call it RNY... What are the most common after effects? Besides throwing up.. that's all I had heard about ever since this started in the 80's.... Crazy8, I hear you Babe when you say it's an addiction to food... just like any other addiction... and the worst one.... you have to have food to live. You don't need cigarettes to live so you can give up smoking and not have to touch them or hold them, see them, or smell them.... you know what I mean... but food .. aahhh .. we have to have it... and for some reason it is our addiction of choice.. I'm a happy drunk I wish I could drink but I think I am allergic to alcohol so I eat... I hide food, I stuff my face on my way home and hide the wrappers if I can't throw them out the window and I feel so guilty about that with the guilt about eating.... I am seeing a therapist and she is the very best one I have ever seen, I've had a few. We have had great successes in other parts of my life so I know with her help and this surgery I will be successful. Any suggestions from you ladies and men about what questions to ask, what foods are good, just anything that help get a little bit more knowledgeable before I jump in. Thank you so much for reading and I have to tell you I have a quirky sense of humor, please bear with me, my family does not know where I came from I am like none of them (except for my grandmother and her sister's sizes).

Hi Kay, As far as Diet coke I still don't drink carbonation drinks. I sipped it once and it gave me an amount of Gas that I won't forget. But I've read people here that can tolerate carbonation. Being real about Alcohol. Talk to your doctor. I do have an occasional drink of alcohol but I can't tolerate sugary drinks of any I tried it my self at the same time. That said enjoy your Holiday.

The chicken noodle soup sounds good. I think that was my first too. Good luck at work! Walk as much as you can and warm beverage (tea, chocolate or coffee) goes good. Forget the sodas & alcohol. Praying for all in Band-Land! Merry Christmas & Happy Healthy New Year!

Okay, here is the mediocre picture of the lemon Protein pudding I made: To give you an idea of portion size, that is a regular size teaspoon and a small dessert ramekin sitting on a saucer. I made a half-box of pudding with one cup of milk, and then turned that recipe into three servings. Here are my ingredients and the final numbers: 1/2 box sugar free, fat free lemon pudding mix 1 cup (240 ml) Carbmaster vanilla Reduced Sugar Milk 2 scoops* Syntrax nectar Medical Unflavored Protein 1/4 t. lemon extract** 1 dollop fat free Redi Whip Final numbers per serving: 62 calories, 10 g. protein, 4 g. carb, 0 g. fat. *Syntrax Nectar Unflavored protein comes in very small scoops! 2 scoops = 80 calories, 20 gr. protein, 0 gr. carbs. **I put in the lemon extract because I love lemon flavoring, but if you do, be warned that the pudding will set a bit softer than normal. If you like super firm pudding, don't add alcohol-based extracts. This was super yummy! I have lots of flavors of pudding mix on hand and will definitely be adding this to my repertoire. Thanks!

1. We love you. 2. We are not going to beat you up. I hope we each realize that "there but for the grace of God go I" OK, I (intellectually) knew that the Sleeve was not magical. But emotionally I just wanted the sleeve to work automatically. Maybe it would be a switch that would turn off my hunger. Maybe the operation would automatically make be want only the 'nutritious' food and change my taste buds so that I'd hate "slider" foods. Maybe the sleeve would end my work and life stress. Maybe the sleeve would vacuum the carpets... (um, sorry) Nope. For me it is a tool and nothing magical at all. I CAN eat around the sleeve. I can eat a lot more than I thought I could and I also have a stomach of steel. Aside from one episode of nausea and vomiting, I have had NO problems. I think I could eat a box of carpet tacks. I have had good loss. I am coming up to 7 months out and am down 100# from my heaviest weight and 45# down from surgery. I have been in a frustrating stall for over a month, sigh, but I press on... But I have a fat brain (named, as many folks here know, "Skippy"). Skippy wants me to eat. ALL the time. I can only deal with Skippy by having a daily eating plan. I know what I will eat and when I will eat and that's it. I just never change from the plan -- not because it's fun or because I don't WANT to -- but because Skippy is freaking insane and is FULL of wonderful snack ideas... Also, from reading here and other research, I have come to believe that I am a Carb Addict. Period. One day I had a bananna... and was STARVING the rest of the day. One day I had a small (tiny) rice pudding cup... and was starving for the rest of the day. This made no sense. BUT I have found that IF I can stay on a very strict low carb eating plan (NO sugars and NO starches and NO processed carbs) for 3 or 4 very difficult days it does get easier. And after about a week, I really don't mind the temptations of TV, work parties, and home; and I no longer have terrible and painful cravings. 3 or 4 TOUGH days to pay for a much easier time later, with Skippy being quiet in the background rather than continuously whispering in my ear. PS, I have given up longing to be normal... I never was and I refuse to "long" to be fat any more. I struggle every day with eating slowly, I drink coffe, my NUT is not happy, but it's the only drug I've got left. PS, I drink it black -- took a month to transition to black coffee but I did, I drink no soda, diet or otherwise, no beer, nothing bubbly I do not smoke (thank God) I limit my alcohol to special occasions, I get my Water in I get my Protein in I write everything down I take the Vitamins required PS, we love you, and this book helped me: http://www.amazon.com/Why-We-Get-Fat-About/dp/0307474259

well i started my preop diet early, i've been working on it since october. I gave up chocolate, alcohol, and cigarettes. Though I've only been banded 2 weeks. I know that I have 2 new addictions. When stressed i used to eat. . IT was my comfort. Now that I've been losing weight my new addiction is sex. and the other one is checking myself in the mirror. I feel kinda vain though for looking in the mirror so much.

I had a food festivus! My wonderful husband actually asked me what meals i wanted for dinner every night for 2 weeks and we planned out a schedule. Since i'm a vegitarian and my husband hates veggies, there were a lot of dishes i knew i could never have again (even as a bite from his) because he would never want/eat it. 1 week before surgery we went to Mexico for our wedding anniversary and i drank my face off. Funny thing is, it's been over 3 months since then and i really couldn't care less about not having alcohol. It was cathartic for me to indulge and eat at excess for the last time ever. Don't feel guilty. This is a big step and it's forever, so do what you need to do to feel comfortable with your new life style. I'm down 62 lbs from my heaviest and i'm 2 1/2 months post surgery and i don't regret a single fat meal i had before my pre-surgery diet. I never cheated on my pre-surgery diet, i was locked into the mindset. I allowed myself the time to go crazy, now it's time to get healthy and love how i look again.

I am dealing with some MAJOR medical issues right now, and I had to see a rheumatologist for the first time yesterday. He was reviewing my medical history and saw that I have had WLS, he questioned why I did it and I said I was 244 pounds, at 5'5 and morbidly obese, he looked me in the eye and said, that is the average sized American why do something so drastic? I was floored. I have never had a doctor ask me why I didn't want to be morbidly obese anymore. I explained to him that I wanted to be healthy, and extend my life. I said the average American also smokes, and drinks alcohol on a regular basis, but I don't do either of those things either. He dropped it, but still I was stunned that he said at 244 pounds I was average for an American, and he was surprised I had surgery. I'm glad I did it, and I think it will help me deal with the problems I'm facing now, but it was still shocking to hear. I am 5 pounds under my goal, and I have had several people tell me that I need to stop losing weight, or ask me if I knew how to stop losing now that I'm at my goal. My mother lectures me all the time about getting too thin, or not eating enough. I am in a size 8, and I don't think I'm too thin at all, I'm very comfortable at the size I am right now. I would love to have the access skin removed, and that will probably make me a size 4, but I'm not doing it for the size, I want to do it to help with the constant rash, and sores that I'm dealing with in the folds of my skin. I am however affraid that when they take off all the extra skin I WILL be underweight. I'm 5'5 and 130 pounds now, is that going to put me in the underweight catagory? That is a question I NEVER thought I would have to ask.

I chose to go to my division Christmas party, where the group was smaller and the food was not the focus, and completely skip the huge food/alcohol-centric orgy that is our University party. It's just too much. Kind of gross actually. I'm going to the gym instead.

i agree with SS. also i think because we are in this situation you need to consider self-sabotage. we have all done it, that is why we are here.sadly. if your surgery is validated, and you are in fact sleeved, and your labs are all normal. do try a do over. do the shakes for 6 weeks, then 30mgs of Protein for three meal, and no carb Snacks. drink all the darn Water and take the power multivites. if you are sleeved, that is unchanged. (anyone with a vertical sleeve can still drink Hershey syrup) you did do this surgery for a reason, get you mind set, get a goal, take baby steps, in one direction, go to the gym, and be good to yourself, no not snack bad, you don't reward alcoholics with booze if they have been sober for a few months.. please keep a good thought and keep us posted

Yes I understand that and some people do just mess it up in less then a month because their mind set does not change but there are people who deal with a lot and more that can't control their life and what happens to them. Because there have been many days this year I could have just as well sucked down a mountain of Hershey bars but I didn't but I can see how people can get in that desperation. Everyone is not as strong as someone else. Yes there are jack asses that will never follow the rules for that I say well then you need your ass kicked but there are others that did all that and then something tragic happens. You don't know unless you are there. It's like being an alcoholic or a drug addict it only takes that one fall to get you right back where you started.

We are here for you. Like begets like. You are doing fantastic. You are not gaining weight are you.? I know just how you feel , even after almost 4 years. I eat very very little. I am so used to it. That's why quality is more important than quantity.. Crapy food in your mouth is just wasted time and calories, you wouldn't put bad gas in your car would you.? Or in your dog or cat. And if you have been reading the post, you know how I feel about alcohol. Keep up ALL the positive things in your life. Hugs

OH my goodness. This is the first time I've read this thread. So sorry you had to go through this. How are you doing? I hope you are better!! I'm 19 months out and leaks can happen even up to 1 year. It is rare but it does happen. There was a gentle that took NSAIDS and drank alcohol and ended up with a leak at one year. We just have to be so careful and do everything the Dr's say but sometimes like in your case you did everything right and still ended up in HELL as you said. Praying for you and I hope you are doing better.

Here's my newsflash. Think about what kind of a drinker you are. In a most small groups, or at home, I have absolutely no trouble with "one and done" or even none. (I work in nonprofits, so I think we "socially" drink more than most professions. One of my board members just shot me a note about our meeting tonight telling me that he will remember a corkscrew this time. Yup.) However, if I get in the right kind of party situation..walking around, chatting, catching up, no repercussions from being unprofessional or people watching to see what I'm doing? I have discovered that I forget myself. So this may totally not apply to you but I would highly recommend that you give your individual habits and tendencies some thought before you imbibe, especially in public. For me, just knowing how the alcohol would affect me didn't prepare me for being on good behavior. I'd been doing so well that I relaxed way too much. This is the other side of whether you're ready. I was not, completely.

I have had wine a few times, I am almost 6 months out. I too got tipsy after 2 glasses. The big thing, I think, is the fact that alcohol is high in calories. Drinking your calories can easily cause weight gain. So I try to keep alcohol to special occasions and not too excess.

Honestly Wanda, I am in about the same place as you! I don't eat much fast food, (used to!) but the treats and parties are abundant. I say no sometimes and yes others. I do write it down on weekdays, because my weekdays are much like my weekends right now! My plan at this time is TRY to fast two days, and if not that then one day a week until new years when things should calm down. So far this has worked pretty well... I went on hikes the last two days. I am in the high side of my current bounce range right now... dont know if its real gain or just bounce from all the salt and sugar and alcohol! My cals a between ok and a little high. It is really hard to eat clean and sober..... but Im trying to use the 5:2 as a shield. This week will be one of the crazyest.... 4 parties! All eating parties, snacky, foodie, you know how that is... like you have said how do you count 4 potatoe chips and french onion dip! I actually try... spend the time on MFP and estimate. Its not perfect by any means, I just try to figure the best I can... Yesterday I went on the road with a foodie friend.... first stop? donuts and starbuck! That was just the start! I packed a lunch which was OK stuff.... walked 3 1/2 miles, stopped for Mexican on the way home... (thanks you sleeve for keeping me from eating the whole plate!) Came home, fed the leftovers to hubby, had Cookies and tea then a 1/2 cup of "trail mix" nuts, raisins, marshmallows, chocolate chips.... Any one of those things could have been ok, but all of them! HOLIDAYS! And that wasn't even a party! ( I came out at around (1647 cals- in the old days that would be a diet day!) ) Anyway, I am a bad influence here.....(devil face!) but I am trying to write it all down, weigh in the AM, drink all my Water, not freak out, and enjoy the days with the idea that it will mellow out pretty soon, and I can lessen the damage by saying NO sometimes, and fasting 1-2 days a week until then. I am fasting today....probably the only day I can officially fast this week if I want to go to the parties and such. I might fast in the AM on evening party day ... I did this once last week and the cals came out around 900... not a real fast, but not serious damage at all. Best of luck.

It sounds like you have a few issues to address. Firstly, you seem to have doubts about how well your op was done - NO food restrictions! Wow. I would be getting an independent medical review that ends with confirming your sleeve was done appropriately - or not - in regard to size/volume. Once that is confirmed, get an endocrine system full check - I'm particularly thinking of your thyroid function. Underactive thyroid is very common, and should be excluded. Even "subclinical" results (normal, but only just) can cause many symptoms like full blown thyroid dysfunction, including weight gain. Finally (or perhaps first), are you recording your diet? Many, many people on this forum will tell you they need to eat less than 1000 cal per day, low fat, low carb and zero alcohol in order to lose weight. With such a limited outcome over a year (unless you didn't have much to lose in the first place) you need to be systematic - and diligent - to get to the bottom of this. Good luck.

Lady D -- alcohol may be a no-no for the first 6 months after sleeve or bypass. SOME programs are less strict. I do NOT know about the band, so I can't comment. A second concern is "transferring" a food addiction to an alcohol addiction... And that is a concern with ALL weight loss!!! And I LOVE wine -- I have a substantial wine collection. At 6 months "T'Giving" I has two glasses of nice wine and at Christmas I will again, but I have work to do, and a lot of alcohol is not on my plan.

3 shakes and leafy green veggies x2 weeks for my preop. I started 2 days early 'cause I was SO ready. Yes, I'm starved and yes, I've had headaches. But I'm on day 12 and It's totally doable... I survived an early Xmas party, a birthday party, and today a memorial service for a friend that passed away Friday. I don't have to tell you about all the food (and alcohol) at those events and I made it through by sipping water non-stop. Just buck up and keep your eye on the big picture. This is only 2 weeks towards improving the rest of your life.

Here is my true holiday party confession. I forgot who I was. Okay, who my stomach now is. Had a second glass of wine (danger Will Robinson.) Then someone ordered some flatbread pizzas, and I thought, "Genius! Good idea. This will soak up the alcohol." How many mistakes had I made thus far, people? Are you keeping count?? So then I had two small squares of the pizza, and felt the hiccups come on. And then mentally hit my hand to my forehead. I forgot that I enjoy chatting so much…and that I don't always pay attention. Can't do this, this way, anymore. But when I got home I dutifully calculated everything, and found that I was only a little over 1200 calories for the day. Since then, I have been more careful and other than an eye sprain from rolling my eyes at myself it's all good. HOWEVER, I think if I had not been in the habit of tracking I would have been either feeling like I had ruined everything, OR underestimating the damages. (1200 calories is 150% of what I should be eating daily, so it's significant.) And the entire overage was in stuff that has questionable nutritional value. So. Back on track, literally and figuratively. And a much better plan going into the next party. Nothing like getting cocky and then getting knocked down.

Thanks Lissa for your wise words of wisdom which I greatly respect, especially given your profession. I have had a brief look at the veterans threads and will spend more time there reading. Lots of people find 5:2 works for them at this stage and I have as well, so need to get back onto that regime as suggested by the dietician. Yes the job is fantastic but I am surrounded by amazing food and alcohol and am put into tempting situations every single day. I do agree it's got to be a conscious effort to resist. I may also eat or drink before going to some of these events so I am not hungry to start with. I just have to be strong and keep my eye on the prize. So close and yet so far!!!

Globe glad to hear you are okay.... and I know what a difference the arms make on my silhouette. About 3 weeks post op my son's girlfriend almost didn't recognize me..except for my hair...my back sitting to them waiting at a bar. She could not see my abs or thighs....smaller arms changed my whole look. Steven didn't know I had skin removal on arms and thought I had somehow lost weight there (naive about reality that I really can't lose weight to fix the problem areas) 1, but very noticeable even under sleeves, more than I realized. So glad I didn't chicken out on the arms. I also lost my dad to the ravages of alcohol. I felt so much guilt when he died but it was mostly for all the years I spent wishing him dead. Time does help and I have come to a certain peace with it and you will too. One thought I have is that now is MY time, my life and I won't let my bad feelings over his life take any more of my precious time here. Yesterday the nieces and nephews were telling funny first date stories and how they met spouses.almost all were online dating. Anyway my niece's hubby talked about his mohawk and kilt he sported at the time. He always got "looks" so part of his reason was to be in control of that. When I go out and about,I get looks. When I was morbidly obese it was for my huge mid section. Now,I don't always know why,but I get"looks". I kind of like wearing something like those flashy shoes, or my striped sweater dresses or whatever and he articulated the reason. I feel confident in cool shoes and like to giggle with other women over it for example. I can go into a store and know I am dressed way outside the social norm and wear it with ease. If I don't have something that I know draws attention I wonder why people are looking. Don't tell me I am paranoid friends have noticed it too...I somehow stand out no matter what. Btw, I did not share my dating adventures. Maybe next year. Yeah and while colored jeans were a trend last spring,the purple jeans were not my best fashion risk...haha. Everyone loved my outfit yesterday including my shoes but I don't have pix! Red and black was my color scheme and I have cute flats with sparkles....my sis called them ruby slippers. This is a family of tennys, crocks and clogs which is all very Seattle. This is NOT a fashion town. Have any of you thought about stress and weight loss? I wonder now that most of us have already lost alot of weight if stress cortisol is part of the mystery.

I told my mom because she was my ride home from the hospital. I asked her not to tell other family members except my dad. I don't think of my family as "haters" but they are definitely judgy and many are the "skinny all my life; fat people are lazy and gluttonous" types. Actually, the overweight ones are worse in that they know all the answers, they just haven't gotten around to applying them. My husband made me tell the kids and that was the right thing to do. I'm not telling any friends except 3 close ones. They have all been very supportive. I'm happy that I haven't told other friends, family or any coworkers. I just don't want to be judged or questioned about my choice. But I will share this one great conversation I had with my close friend (size 4 her whole life) about my concerns that some people would judge me that I'd taken "the easy way" out of my weight problem. Her response? "B*tch, please! You just told me that you've given up coffee, alcohol, smoking, and croissants! That sure doesn't sound like the easy way to me!" I love that chick.