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I quit smoking cigarettes in December and have no plans on going back to it! I live in Colorado and recreational is legal here. I have never really enjoyed getting high, but I actually thought about it when I quit smoking just to have that sensation of inhaling again...I decided against it. Mainly, I want my lungs to be healthy and to not pick up another addiction when I will be trying to beat to others (nicotine and food) If you are in Colorado or Washington, I would suggest edibles...no lung damage, no smoke entering the system. Or perhaps a vaporizer which may be less toxic to your lungs But I would also suggest really looking at your smoking and making certain you aren't switching one problem for another. I know I will be doing that with my drinking...When I learned that I wouldn't be able to drink after surgery I got a little panicked...which made me realize that I may need to look at why and how much I drink. I am not an alcoholic, but I do think I can use alcohol much like I use food...to numb and ignore yucky feelings. Surgery, for me, is a tool to not only lose weight and get my health back, but it is also an opportunity to figure some stuff out...really face how and why I got here in the first place, which means not replacing food with nicotine or booze or weed. Best of luck!

No words sting worse to the ear of an alcoholic than the words of a "sober, recovering" alcoholic. But, I do think most come here for "support" and are in varying stages of recovery. At least on the internet you can take what you want and leave the rest. Some people have super steely constitutions. Some are weak. We all have stuff to learn from one another. But I get your original post. It's the Facebook friend who ONLY posts her EVERY woe. How can someone be truly that miserable???? The ones who do that (from my experience) usually create their own misery. Still, I think leadership means you foster hope in others. There is some "owned" responsibility to help others. Even if they are mind-boggling ridunculous. I almost spit out my coffee laughing at the "not to Scottland" response! Lolololol

One drink can make you drunk, the alcohol goes straight into your blood stream. Be very careful if you do decide to have drink.

Alcohol for me after surgery will be a big no-no. It has too much sugar and that's my trigger so I won't even consider it. If you not a big drinker find something else to drink, Water with a twist of lemon would probably be the best option.

What did your surgeon and team tell you? You should follow their advice...that's usually no alcohol? Just my opinion, but I don't think you should be considering alcohol only 7 weeks out. Take care x

How soon after bypass did u start drinking alcohol? I know beer is out, but a friend is having a big birthday bash soon and I was wondering. I am only 7 weeks out. I will be about 9 by then. Im pretty confident finding what I can eat in social situations without feeling awkward but im not a big drinker as it is.... I just dont wanna feel/seem like a total party pooper.

Last week my mother was looking at the pics on my phone, and she came across a few from my work Christmas party, in which I was dressed up for. I also happened to be exactly 3 months post op, and 50 pounds lighter, so I used that time to create my "monthly" post pic. The poses were akward and stiff, you know................back view, side view, the whole deal. I was also in a skirt, for the first time in years! So, anyway, my mom, who is also an alcoholic 5 years sober (I am sure you know the type............in their own world and only thinking about themselves! LOL) looked at these pics and said "these would be good pics to use as your before pics"!!! Oh my god!!!! Moms...............gotta love "em!!

A couple of nights ago I awoke at 2 am to go to the bathroom. On a whim, after I was done I stepped on the bathroom scale…to find that I have lost 100 lbs since the start of my pre-op diet; and 90 lbs since surgery on May 22, 2013. I had a hard time going back to sleep I was so excited! I want to lose (I think) about 39 to 44 more. I will be a healthy BMI for my height when I lose 20 more, so I will reevaluate then. I cannot describe the mindf*** having reached this goal is! I knew it would be though….I had faith I’d get here, and yet I am still shocked that I got here. I’ve worked hard, but because of so many failed attempts in my past, the fact that my hard work is actually paying off this time is mind blowing. I am thrilled beyond belief and am filled with wonderment! I need to post before and after pics maybe -- just to help me wrap my head around this. I can’t believe I’ve lost 100 lbs. I can’t believe I weighed 100 more lbs than I do now just 8 months ago. I still feel like me, so how can this be? I do feel SO much better. I feel totally different and very much the same – all at this same time! It is so bizarre. I feel so different in all good ways, and very much the same, also in all the good ways. All the clothes that were once too small for me are now too big. The size 12’s I got so that I could shrink into them, now all of a sudden are too big, and I think “How can this be? What is this strange phenomenon? “ LOL The holidays were an interesting learning experience for me. I got to “onederland” the morning of Thanksgiving, which was Nov 28. Between that day and Dec 30, a month later, I had lost only 4 lbs. Don’t get me wrong, I do see the value in losing 4 lbs, especially during the holidays, when in years past that was a major gain time. But it was a significant slow down from recent months. Over the holidays, I had alcohol, I had sweets, I had bread – no never in large quantities, but I loosened the reigns compared to how I have been eating. I also during this time did not always follow the “protein first “ rule, and I sometimes sipped a beverage with my food. I did all of this mindfully, fully aware of what I was doing, I went slow so as not to over do it, but I was definitely “celebrating” -- I was doing so to enjoy the family holiday meals and such. I knew the consequences would be slow weight loss and/or maintaining. But it was MY decision and I was in complete control. Ah, it was so liberating. I believe I have seen a glimpse of what maintenance might be like when I reach goal. I feel strong, ….and I feel taller I was doing some Pilates on the living room floor the other night and my husband came in. He admired me for a minute and then said “My wife has nice long legs” and I just giggled and said “They’re getting longer all the time!” Nowadays when I take the dog out for a hike, I sometimes jog for half of it. ME. I freekin jog. Unheard of! And really, aside from just being more active in general, I have not started any kind of hard-core grueling exercise routine. I don’t go to the gym, I don’t watch a clock that says I have done cardio for x minutes. I happily take my dog out & frolic a bit until my heart rate goes up, and sometimes, just because my body feels good and strong and happy, I do some Pilates-type moves on the living room floor. I suppose I may need to incorporate more formal or stringent exercise into my life as some kind of routine as I try to get closer to goal. It’s certainly not a BAD idea. But my point is, I haven’t had to break my neck to get to this point. I’ve just naturally started wanting to do more and more. And that, my friends, is what I believe is a true life style change. Hooray! So yes, I am happy. And yes, I have faith that I will achieve my goals. What do I look forward to most? Getting to goal and being there long enough that THAT is my reality, not a novelty. I want people to just know my at my healthy weight in my healthy life style, and not think of me as the girl who lost all that weight. I am so ready to have this be the rest of my life. Onward!

I was wondering if not being able to drunk was normal. I too can not get drunk nor do I like the taste anymore. Any alcohol turn up my stomach, its just disgusting to me right now.

My new tummy, at 4 weeks out, raises an objection for anything over 1/3 cup plus 2 tablespoons. Sometime, like this morning, I was eating scrambled eggs and cheese, and could only eat two bites. Drinking alcoholic beverages is something I won't be doing for a long time. Everything I consume must have food value of some sort.

I am saddened by the tone this thread has taken. How many of us have heard "Why didn't you just eat less?" I don't think there is one person here who has ever weighed 600 lbs. It takes a very severe food addiction to reach that point. IMO, Penny needed support she did not receive. Perhaps a longer hospital stay so her food choices could have been more restricted. For sure, more counseling. I understand people who contributed financially are disappointed, but there are no guarantees in life. Of course, we've all seen that ability to make choices and the lack of intervention to stop them due to legal and financial restraints. I have friends and family members who abuse food, alcohol, and other drugs and I can't stop them. It hurts, but I have learned that heaping guilt and scorn on them does not help them or me. I haven't seen the show, but I do know that most reality shows are scripted and any story can be twisted a bit based on the bias in which it is shot and edited. Not that there is any denying that she made bad food choices, was enabled by those around her, and didn't want to face the face that she has responsibility too. This is just my opinion, but before you comment, please remember the hurtful things others have said to you. How many people are secretly wondering why you didn't get thin sooner for your childen's sake? How many are wondering why you just didn't get it under control with diet and exercise? Lynda

It sounds like a lot of you December people are struggling. I'm almost eight months out - here are some of the things I learned: Emotional problems are common in the beginning. In addition to dealing with cravings and mourning old food favorites you are experiencing hormonal issues. There are hormones stored with the fat - as you burn the fat these hormones are released into your system making you feel as if you're on an emotional roller coaster. Everyone experiences food issues like vomiting, nausea, pain, foamies, and getting stuck. While you are introducing new foods and experimenting with what you can tolerate it's inevitable and part of the learning process. It's also a sort of 'aversion therapy' - if you eat something that makes you miserable you don't want to experience that again! So that also helps change how you look at certain foods. I had a relatively small list of 'safe' foods. By week five when I moved on from mushy foods I could to tolerate tilapia, scrambled egg (as long as it wasn't cooked too dry) pea soup (good protein for a veggie soup), chili (Wendy's or my own homemade), hummus, ground meats like turkey or chicken, meatballs, meatloaf, broccoli, cauliflower, zuchini 'pizza' (zuchini stuffed with diced tomatoes, feta, mozzarella, turkey pepperoni, and basil - Yum!) and deviled eggs. I couldn't do hard boiled - too dry. Very bad foods for me were tuna and any kind of chicken except ground. Special food instructions from my team were no raw veggies for 3 months (veggie fibers can get caught in the pouch staples), no nuts for six months, no caffeine for six months (diuretic, pouch irritant, acidic can cause ulcers), no alcohol for one year (liver working overtime to process toxins released w/fat loss - alcohol can cause liver failure during this time, alcohol is an irritant that can cause ulcers, and high cross-addiction risk for some people). Also no white anything EVER - white potatoes, white bread, white pasta, white rice. No nutrients in anything white. Always choose whole grains, brown rice, quinoa. Don't try to find substitutions for old favorites that are too similar to them. From there it's just a short jump back to old bad habits. Instead find new favorites that are totally different. Become as gourmet - savor your food, eating slowly. We eat so little that I don't care what something costs. I only eat a tiny bit anyway, so I want it to be awesome! I can make a whole meal out of 4 cocktail shrimp and a little cocktail sauce. Most of all, celebrate your successes! Each pound or inch lost, meeting protein, water, or exercise goals, avoiding a temptation or solving a problem, donating one more bag of clothes to charity, not taking that med anymore, doing something you could never do before like wear a seatbelt, or play with your kids, walk that mile, or wear that dress, or so many other things that each of us find amazing when they happen. Celebrate all those things - you work HARD for them!!! Don't compare yourself to others. We are all different. We lose at different rates. How we lose is affected by so very many different things - age, health, activity level, abilities, gender. Comparing yourself to others will only make you unhappy with yourself. Your journey is about YOU. :-)

Hi Morticia,<br />To be honest, I was very nervous about the Psyche evaluation but it was not as bad as I thought it could be. They are looking to see if you have any severe psychological issues, if you have any drug or alcohol addictions. I spoke with the Dr. for about 20 minutes about why I wanted the surgery and what I expected the surgery to do for me. I then answered a multiple choice test of about 900 questions asking a number of questions about my eating habits, mental state of mind, addictions, personality traits etc. Sometimes the same question is asked multiple times but worded differently. Just be honest with your self, the test and the doctor and you should be fine. If you act like you are trying to hide something the doctor might think you are hiding "issues" and he/she might be inclined to stall your surgery. Don't worry about anything, just go in there with the attitude that you've got this and complete the interview and the written test. You will do great.

We are already in to week three of the year. How many of you made a resolution to lose weight? Did you promise yourself you were going to lose a few unsightly pounds, or are you thinking about losing the weight of a small Volkswagen? Well, I'm here to tell you that regardless of how much you want to lose, to be successful you've got to get right in the head first. There is a huge chasm between thinking about it and doing it. The first thing you need to do is ask yourself: "Self ... am I ready for this? Am I ready to severely change my life? Am I ready to rethink the way I look at food and drink? Am I ready to temporarily forego dinner parties, lunches, and various other social functions? Am I ready to make my weight loss the most important thing in my life? Am I ready to become more active? Am I ready to find a plan and stick to it? Am I ready to have patience? Am I committed to succeed? Well, are ya? If you have answered NO to any of the aforementioned questions, you probably need to rethink your resolution. Whether you're thinking of blowing out 5 pounds of baby fat or 100 pounds of fat ass, the commitment is the same. The only difference is the distance you may travel. Your 5 pounds may take a couple of weeks. Your 100 pounds may take a couple of years. I know this first hand. If you read my previous rant, you'll remember that Dr. X shocked me by telling me that my quest for Thindom is a 2 year journey. All the while, stupid me was banking on being done in one year. So if you're a "biggun" hitting for the fences, face the fact that you're going to be doing this for a while. Let's talk to possible Lap-Band candidates. Know this. Don't think you're going to go in for your first consultation and schedule a surgery date. That's what I thought. I went in on January 21, 2013 and thought I would schedule my surgery for a few weeks away. Right between some travel plans I had. Oh NAY NAY! I was given a laundry list of things that I needed to accomplish to get scheduled. My doctor told me if I was diligent, I could get it done in 5 months. Yikes! I saw numerous doctors, shrinks, exercise gurus, nutritionists and fat counselors. I went to group therapies and had batteries of test done. I did everything asked of me as quick as possible and it took me 4 months to get the food fighter installed. So potential Lap-Banders ... be ready for that! Another thing Lap-Band candidates must grasp. This Lap-Band contraption is nothing more than a tool. To be successful, you must find a diet plan your comfortable with and stick to it! Fact is, it will be a while after your surgery that you even feel the device working for you. In my case, it was at least 5 months of saline injections before I finally felt a small restriction. Even after 8 months, I still am not in the "green zone". My doctor and nutritionist discuss this every month at my check-in. And every month we're still tweaking it up a bit. It's all part of the process. Bottom line readers ... If you're trying to lose weight, it's gonna take commitment and time. I have read many blogs of newbie lap-band patients that are disappointed in their results. But if you read between the lines it's always the same. They got the surgery and they are sitting on their collective fat asses waiting for the pounds to melt away. Sorry. That just ain't gonna happen! Going into month 9, I am bouncing around the 70 pound loss number. I did it by carefully watching my calorie intake of both food and alcohol. I have gotten more active. Do I work out? Yes, but I ain't killing myself doing it. After all, my original goal was just to fit back into my Level 3 pants. I was never trying to qualify for the Olympics. I will get back to you when I am firmly under that 70 mark. Should be real soon! Johnny

Many people don’t understand the obese person’s journey with food. Nor can they relate to actually being under the influence of the intense food cravings, but ask any alcoholic or drug addict what these cravings feel like, and a food addict will be able to recount a very similar craving. The substance most craved with food addicts is sugar, and anyone who has tried to remove sugar from their diet knows how incredibly difficult that can be. The majority of food addicts have been brought up with another addiction. Maybe their parents were alcoholics, abusive, gamblers, smokers or hoarders. The child learned it was safer to turn to food or some other substance for comfort, because turning to a human for a hug or soothing words was impossible. Many food addicts lose weight to get married, only to find that they don’t have the skills to communicate loneliness, boredom, or anxiety to their partner. They slowly begin to turn to what has helped soothe them in the past, which is food. Before long, communication is compromised in the relationship. There is severe weight gain, which begins a disastrous cycle of withdrawing from sex, and turning to food. Soon the partner isn’t happy and the food addict feels shameful and guilty. These feelings of guilt and shame lock the cycle of turning to food even more securely. Weight loss surgery can help minimize disease and help people become more confident and mobile, but if there is an underlying sugar or food addiction, the weight will be re-gained. Sometimes that is in excess of eighty pounds. How can you help if you are addicted, married or know a food addict during the holidays? The key is to plan now. Realize that your partner or friend has a bigger problem than just eating too much. They need professional help, and they need it now. Find out who is on your plan for insurance and what it allows for help with eating disorders. Begin journaling your intake and talk to your partner about journaling theirs as well. This helps you become a team and to feel supported. Encourage your partner to begin turning to you for comfort or if you are alone, have someone who can accompany you to the party. Stay close to them, and when you feel alone turn to them for conversation or hold their hand. This helps delay your sense of needing food. Help them join a food addiction group, and if they are your partner, go with them if they need your support. There are several in Houston, and “Over Eaters Anonymous” offers a 12-step program for food addicts. Your partner suffers shame and guilt every day. Try to remember this, and be gentle. There is a lot of secrecy in this disorder. If they let you in, respect that. Food addicts are hurt, and we as a society can become part of the problem or part of the solution. Most addicts of food (and other addictions) have an enabler. The enabler complains about the behavior, but also supplies the fix. People who are co-dependent or have a low self-esteem may derive their security from enabling an addict. If you live with a food addict, or you suffer a food addiction, the best thing you can do prior to going to the party or being with friends where a lot of food will be present is to have a plan. Set a time limit for yourself at the party and have someone you are accountable to who helps you stay on track. –Mary Jo Rapini *As with all addictions, interventions only work if the addict wants to heal. Harping, nagging and pleading will be met with resistance to change until the addict is ready to make the change.

Know this: If you stop and listen to yourself... I mean really listen... you will always know how to act in a way that honors your Highest Good. You will always know the next right thing to do! (Isn’t that coooool? You already have all the answers inside you... It really is exciting if you think about it!) I believe we are all born these perfect little psychic bundles of love. As infants, if we’re happy we laugh, sad we cry, hungry we eat, full we stop eating. We are our Truth in every moment and have no fear about expressing who we are or how we feel. In fact, we don’t know how not to take care of ourselves. It doesn’t occur to us to not ask, or for that matter demand, that our needs be met. But soon after our birth, we begin receiving millions of messages that it is not okay or safe to express our Truth, to follow the natural flow of our Soul’s Wisdom, to ask for what we need. These messages come in the form of statements like— “Ooohh, stop crying!” “That didn’t hurt.” “Big boys don’t cry!” “Children should be seen but not heard.” “That was a stupid thing to say.” “I don’t care what you want to do; you need to do what I tell you to do.” “Never let other people know that our family is not perfect” “You can’t possibly be hungry now.” Or maybe the messages took on a physical form and you were beaten when you expressed a feeling or spoke out of line, or even for no apparent reason. Over time after being bombarded with messages like these, even though many of them may have been said with the best of intentions, you stop looking inward for guidance; you learn to silence your sacred voice of wisdom. Then one day someone comes along and asks you, “What color is the sky?” And you think, “Well, I think it’s blue, but I don’t know if what I think or feel about the sky is right because the other day I heard my parents arguing and I asked Mommy what was wrong and she told me that nothing was wrong, everything was just fine... but it didn’t feel fine to me, it felt like my parents were really angry, like something wasn’t right with them... but Mommy who is the expert about life said everything was “OK”... so something must be wrong with the way I think or perceive things... so maybe the sky is really purple or green... Ahhhh I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what to do... I think it is blue, but I am not sure if that really is the right answer, or if it is the answer they want... “I just wish I knew what they wanted me to say.” This thought process is the beginning of you disconnecting from your inner voice, your Divine Wisdom. This is where you get lost. When you are unable to say your Truth, or live from Source Energy, you will inevitably notice some emotional and/or physical discomfort which typically manifests as anxiety, depression, sadness, anger, nausea, exhaustion, sleeplessness, chronic headaches, joint pain, or intestinal distress. In order to calm down those feelings you may have learned to turn to things outside of yourself for comfort like food, drugs, alcohol, people pleasing, shopping, or compulsive work. Well, it’s time for you to come home to Yourself!! Before you can change a behavior you have to be aware that it exists. Below I have listed signs of "disconnection." Indications of Disconnection from Your Authentic Self * You worry about what other people think of you. * You over/under eat, smoke, drink a little too much, or depend on prescription medications more than you would like to get through a day. * You are always the peace maker. * You find it difficult to say “no” to people or set boundaries. * You are the “life of the party” to your family and friends, but secretly feel stressed and depressed. * You seemingly “have it all” but still feel an uncomfortable emptiness, like something is just missing from your life. * You feel disappointed with the way your life has turned out so far. * You are regretful about things that happened in your past. * You are afraid to make changes in your life. * You feel responsible for the happiness of others. * You spend most of your day tending to the needs of others. * Your days are so busy that you find yourself being really forgetful and making silly mistakes. * Your mood is dependent upon the mood or actions of others. * You worry a lot. * You gossip. * You have an underlying feeling of unworthiness. * You are in an abusive relationship (you may be the abuser or the abused). * Your self worth is determined by the “things you have”, the money you make, the number on the scale, the position you hold at your job, or the success of your children or spouse * You avoid disagreements at all costs... or * You argue all the time. * You are uncomfortable with silence. * You feel like you are always “putting out fires” or living in constant chaos. * You feel like you are “walking on eggshells” around significant people in your life. * You are afraid to speak up for yourself. * You often feel anxious, depressed, angry, or sad. * You have a low tolerance for or feel very judgmental of people who have opinions or values that differ from yours. * You feel like you always have to defend or explain yourself. * You have difficulty accepting compliments. * It is very difficult for you to look in a mirror, directly into your eyes, and say, “I love you! You are the most important person in the world to me and I am going to take good care of you!’” ____ _______________________________________________________ Notice if there is a time this week when you act from a place of disconnection, when you choose to not listen to your Intuition. Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to ignore your Inner Voice. Take some time to reflect on how you may have learned to disconnect from your Authentic Self. Also, notice a specific time this week when you did listen and respond in accordance with your Intuition, when you felt like you were being your True Self. Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to “Be Your Truth.” How was your experience different when you acted from a “place of disconnect” versus when you acted in accordance with your Inner Wisdom or Truth?

Know this: If you stop and listen to yourself... I mean really listen... you will always know how to act in a way that honors your Highest Good. You will always know the next right thing to do! (Isn’t that coooool? You already have all the answers inside you... It really is exciting if you think about it!) I believe we are all born these perfect little psychic bundles of love. As infants, if we’re happy we laugh, sad we cry, hungry we eat, full we stop eating. We are our Truth in every moment and have no fear about expressing who we are or how we feel. In fact, we don’t know how not to take care of ourselves. It doesn’t occur to us to not ask, or for that matter demand, that our needs be met. But soon after our birth, we begin receiving millions of messages that it is not okay or safe to express our Truth, to follow the natural flow of our Soul’s Wisdom, to ask for what we need. These messages come in the form of statements like— “Ooohh, stop crying!” “That didn’t hurt.” “Big boys don’t cry!” “Children should be seen but not heard.” “That was a stupid thing to say.” “I don’t care what you want to do; you need to do what I tell you to do.” “Never let other people know that our family is not perfect” “You can’t possibly be hungry now.” Or maybe the messages took on a physical form and you were beaten when you expressed a feeling or spoke out of line, or even for no apparent reason. Over time after being bombarded with messages like these, even though many of them may have been said with the best of intentions, you stop looking inward for guidance; you learn to silence your sacred voice of wisdom. Then one day someone comes along and asks you, “What color is the sky?” And you think, “Well, I think it’s blue, but I don’t know if what I think or feel about the sky is right because the other day I heard my parents arguing and I asked Mommy what was wrong and she told me that nothing was wrong, everything was just fine... but it didn’t feel fine to me, it felt like my parents were really angry, like something wasn’t right with them... but Mommy who is the expert about life said everything was “OK”... so something must be wrong with the way I think or perceive things... so maybe the sky is really purple or green... Ahhhh I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what to do... I think it is blue, but I am not sure if that really is the right answer, or if it is the answer they want... “I just wish I knew what they wanted me to say.” This thought process is the beginning of you disconnecting from your inner voice, your Divine Wisdom. This is where you get lost. When you are unable to say your Truth, or live from Source Energy, you will inevitably notice some emotional and/or physical discomfort which typically manifests as anxiety, depression, sadness, anger, nausea, exhaustion, sleeplessness, chronic headaches, joint pain, or intestinal distress. In order to calm down those feelings you may have learned to turn to things outside of yourself for comfort like food, drugs, alcohol, people pleasing, shopping, or compulsive work. Well, it’s time for you to come home to Yourself!! Before you can change a behavior you have to be aware that it exists. Below I have listed signs of "disconnection." Indications of Disconnection from Your Authentic Self * You worry about what other people think of you. * You over/under eat, smoke, drink a little too much, or depend on prescription medications more than you would like to get through a day. * You are always the peace maker. * You find it difficult to say “no” to people or set boundaries. * You are the “life of the party” to your family and friends, but secretly feel stressed and depressed. * You seemingly “have it all” but still feel an uncomfortable emptiness, like something is just missing from your life. * You feel disappointed with the way your life has turned out so far. * You are regretful about things that happened in your past. * You are afraid to make changes in your life. * You feel responsible for the happiness of others. * You spend most of your day tending to the needs of others. * Your days are so busy that you find yourself being really forgetful and making silly mistakes. * Your mood is dependent upon the mood or actions of others. * You worry a lot. * You gossip. * You have an underlying feeling of unworthiness. * You are in an abusive relationship (you may be the abuser or the abused). * Your self worth is determined by the “things you have”, the money you make, the number on the scale, the position you hold at your job, or the success of your children or spouse * You avoid disagreements at all costs... or * You argue all the time. * You are uncomfortable with silence. * You feel like you are always “putting out fires” or living in constant chaos. * You feel like you are “walking on eggshells” around significant people in your life. * You are afraid to speak up for yourself. * You often feel anxious, depressed, angry, or sad. * You have a low tolerance for or feel very judgmental of people who have opinions or values that differ from yours. * You feel like you always have to defend or explain yourself. * You have difficulty accepting compliments. * It is very difficult for you to look in a mirror, directly into your eyes, and say, “I love you! You are the most important person in the world to me and I am going to take good care of you!’” ____ _______________________________________________________ Notice if there is a time this week when you act from a place of disconnection, when you choose to not listen to your Intuition. Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to ignore your Inner Voice. Take some time to reflect on how you may have learned to disconnect from your Authentic Self. Also, notice a specific time this week when you did listen and respond in accordance with your Intuition, when you felt like you were being your True Self. Write about the situation, how it turned out, and how it felt to “Be Your Truth.” How was your experience different when you acted from a “place of disconnect” versus when you acted in accordance with your Inner Wisdom or Truth?

Thanks for the support guys I really appreciate it. And it is Kelly with a y M2 I think a friend is hosting a superbowl party - I am sure it will be a festival of bad for us food so I will do my best to prep for hubby and myself. It is very exciting for our teams to be competing! Best of luck to your Bronco's and I hope that my team will do well - I think it will be quite a show with our strong defense going against your powerful offense. We both know we display seriously addictive behaviors with food - this dysfunction runs in both of our families with obesity, drug and alcohol and co-dependency issues. I have felt better since my venty post - The house is cleaned out of crap and I have had a bit of a mental reboot - I tend to go right to the place where I feel that I am a failure even when I have had incredible success, even though I have yet to hit that elusive goal weight, I need to work on telling myself that I am till a success! Hard work. My husband works out lke a demon an hour a day - 6 days a week. He runs on the treadmill like a contestant on the biggest loser at 16 weeks in, he can run at a full on sprint which he can maintain for quite a while - it is freakishly impressive. I have an old friend from NYC that I met when I lived in the city - she had/has a serious issue with sugar - we would go to the magnolia bakery in the west village and she would order 5 massive pieces of cake - eat them all and then workout like a madman every day so she could eat that way - she looks very fit. I have seen this woman buy two carrot cakes and skin them of their cream cheese frosting like a wild animal. Brent, my husband has said that he is on the "Kendall" plan lol. He tends to follow my lead and I can get militant with keeping our home safe with good foods so I know things will get back to normal. The good thing is experiencing the crazy food thing over the holidays and coming out the other side - I will prepare accordingly. It starts to get rough in September with the kickoff of all of the family females birthdays, each one of us has a birthday mid-month September, October, November, and then we are well into holiday season. So the fall/winter third of the year, when comforty foods and food focused socializing gets going and the weather gets cold and rainy and blah is when it gets harder for me. I think OA is something I will like - I think that one reason that the lapse of our normal program of nutrition and exercise has been so scary is feeling out of control again. It isn't just about the lbs..the weight is the symptom. I spent so long with my head buried in the sand and not taking responsibility for my health that feeling a loss of control is frightening. My resolution for the year has been to work on my resilience....Clarity is another one that seems to be presenting itself again and again. It feels as if I am learning to be a better advocate for myself - with my health, my job (which more and more I realize is a corrupt system - academic/adjuncts, which I wont be able to change.) Healing and mindfulness for all of us Thank you guys for your kind words and thoughts.

I think this is the most important episode for anyone looking into having WLS or for anyone who has already had it. WLS is NOT a magic solution. I've noticed many of the showcases on this show start out thinking that, then they get smacked upside the head with reality. Some face the demons and straighten it out - while others, like last night's Penny contain their pacifiers. Living with a co-dependent person such as herself and her husband is a detriment to truly beating any addiction. Whether it be drugs, alcohol or in this case food. IMHO, anyone who has become obese has some element of food addiction. How can they not? Until everyone in that position embraces this fact, they will always fall off the wagon (including myself). She was playing his love for her against him, and he fell for it hook, line and sinker. He likes the life they're living, based on some of his commentary on the show. He expressed that he hoped she didn't expect all of them to eat on a diet. He is complete denial too. I was in awe at how much! I couldn't believe the excuses coming out of both of their mouths. They truly do live in a "fantasy world". Someone on my FB mentioned that she revised to RnY. If that's true then she's getting a second chance and I pray she gets it right this time. However, it's not likely because she thinks all of her troubles will be over by fixing her stomach. It's really our brains we need to work on simultaneously.

I was told NO alcohol...like EVER! one sip and you will be on your butt because your body cannot tolerate it, beside the wasted calories... if you haven't started, I say DON'T... your doctor may be different, but there are no benefits from alcohol... you may want to wait until after your birthday to have it done if you are intent on partying like that...

Oh ok! How much have you lost so far?! I think everyone hits that same stall! I stalled for like 15 days and havent drank anything yet. I set a goal of 60 days for myself lol I was sleeved on 12/20. And theres no way I plan on giving up alcohol forever, beer maybe. Have you gotten drunk? Or just had a drink or two here and there?

Anyone who believes that this was an easy way out for us needs their heads examined!! I struggle EVERY day with my food demons. They are still there...I fight to keep them at bay. I certainly understand the drug addict or the alcoholic...except we still have to eat!!

The products are by Nutritional Frontiers. It's a protein shake in the morning with a scoop of Pro Greens in the shake. The pills you take are called Liv Cleanse II. Then you follow a diet cutting out gluten, caffeine , bread, dairy, peanuts, alcohol and whole list of others. It's to detox the liver of and heavy chemical, metal, or toxins. I have been on a ton of meds since 2009 and I think I would really benefit from this. We will see.

My doc told me i couldn't ever have alcohol again and that I couldn't even cook with it. Doesn't effect me though because I don't ever do either of the two.

Not that I'm proud of it and don't want to seem like an alcoholic but I've been drinking just two weeks post op. I can't remember the guideline, but it was more explained to me as an empty calorie drink and since you're not eating/drinking that much at this time they wanted to shoot for maximum weightloss. I can't do anything carbonated, well maybe a sip or two of my finances beer. Usually I pass whatever I'm drinking over to him to finish anyways (more to save calories and that I really no longer want that much. Tolerance has significantly decreased too which is a good thing right? I'm definitely not a good example and this is probably a contributing factor for the stalling of my weight loss. Above all else, follow your doctors recommendation above listening to people who cheat . (Banded 12/16)