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Hi Jackie, I no it sound daft bt i was plannin on takin a flask of bovril as i luv this the most and stickin to ice water at th reception. I feel guilty if i dont go as it's a close friend and nobody knows apart from my partner and mam that im havin the surgery. I'm plannin on tellin my freinds after the weddin bt dont want them 2 worry as they al hav so much 2 worry about at th min!!! As for th questions i'll gt asked when i wip my flask out and they see i'm nt eatin n drinkin alcohol. I suppose I'll hav to tell a few white lies and say i'm feelin a little under th weather.... The weddin is at 12.30 and its about an hours drive from where I live so I'm just gonna take it easy and hope to stay as long as i can bt i'm nt goin to be stupid. I'm gonna come home as soon as i start to feel tired, as i really dont want 2 over do it. Thanks 4 reply SJS x Being Banded on 1st September

To all I thought this info was really helpfull. For those that have been banded by Dr Chris, what aftercare is offered is there a contact in the UK. What to Eat WheN - After Lap Band Surgery In hospital straight after surgery to day 1 CLEAR FLUIDS OVERNIGHT water clear fruit juice and cordial only [*]don’t drink everything at once [*]small amounts often – 50mls every 10 minutes [*]suck on ice if thirsty or dry [*]no fizzy drinks NO SOLID FOOD - CLEAR FLUIDS ONLY VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Do NOT eat anything other than water, clear fruit juice, clear consommé, and black tea/coffee or cordial – even if it has been delivered to your room – it is probably a mistake. EATING UTENSIL Slim straw only Days 2 to 21-28 - Liquids Only LIQUIDS ONLY – small amounts frequently to keep you hydrated – 50mls every 10 minutes (up to 2 litres per day). Within a week you should be able to drink 1 cup of fluid slowly. 120 ml fruit juice 250 ml vegetable juices/ vegetable soup (pureed, thin) protein drinks reduced fat milk fully vitamised chicken/meat & vegetable soup no fizzy drinks NO SOLID FOOD - FLUIDS ONLY VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Drink small amounts often. Your new stomach pouch is small. Don’t overstretch it by drinking too much at once. Sip slowly, Small mouthfuls. If you can’t get it through a slim straw easily you can’t have it. EATING UTENSIL Slim straw only Days 21-28 to 35 - Sloppy Low Fibre Foods SLOPPY LOW FIBRE FOODS ONLY – EASILY SQUISHED THROUGH THE FINGERS - OR – THE THICKNESS OF BABY’S FIRST FOOD OR SMOOTHED MASHED POTATO turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating sip very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between sips no more than 200mls at a time 2 lite dairy/soya serves daily (1 serve= 1cup milk or 200g lite yoghurt or 35 g cheese) ½ cup pureed fruit or mashed banana puree cooked veal, pork or chicken, avoid beef (too fibrous) eat small amounts slowly but more frequently, hunger makes you eat faster avoid lobster, squid or prawns avoid home-cooked spaghetti & rice tinned spaghetti & tinned creamy rice are okay no fizzy drinks VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly and chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Low fibre fruit & vegetables only Low fibre means without the fibrous skin. Dried fruits like prunes, raisins & sultanas are also off the menu for this month. Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. SLOPPY/PUREED LOW FIBRE FOODS ONLY EATING UTENSILS MacDonald’s sized thicker straw or Teaspoon ^top Days 35- 42 - Transition Phase TRANSITION PHASE – gradually introduce solids from 5 to 6 weeks only very cautiously turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating do not increase the portion sizes you have become used to over the last 4 weeks eat very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between each mouth full cautiously introduce cooked unblended chicken or veal – 50 grams in total to begin with cautiously introduce cooked unblended vegetables cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces, then chew very well VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly Chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Cut meat into tiny pieces Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. EATING UTENSILS Teaspoon or Equivalent Size ^top What to eat for the rest of your life turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating do not increase the portion sizes you have become used to over the last 4 weeks continue the further introduction of solids that you began to introduce at 5 to 6 weeks very cautiously the volume and coarseness of the food should slowly be increased over the coming weeks eat very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between each mouth full continue to cautiously introduce cooked unblended chicken or veal – begin with 50 grams continue to cautiously introduce cooked unblended vegetables cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces, then chew very well 30 times each mouth full by about week 10 you should be at the point where you can attend a restaurant and eat an entrée sized meal in both volume and consistency – the time it takes you to eat this meal should equal the time it takes your eating partner to consume both entrée and main meal VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly Chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Cut meat into tiny pieces Cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. EATING UTENSILS Teaspoon or Equivalent Size ^top Tips for Eating Out the drinking rule still applies, 15 minutes or more before eating and one hour after eating; special exception because you’re eating out, you can take tiny sips of liquid while eating while we’re on the drinking subject, for those of us who don’t mind a tipple, with the Lap Band in place alcohol will be absorbed much more quickly and therefore if consumed should be done so very slowly – remember, less is more and a lower tolerance can mean higher blood alcohol levels, so if you’re going to drink, please don’t drive just because you’re eating out, don’t decide to “make a meal of it” so to speak, and consume more than you have become used to over the last ten weeks eat one entrée sized meal only over the time it takes your eating companion to consume both entrée and main course if you don’t like the entrée choices, ask for the main meal served entrée size remember, we often eat just for taste, and not for hunger; if you remember this then savouring one tiny teaspoon of your partner’s dessert for the taste is all you really need if you’re worried about drawing attention to yourself by making the above requests, or by seeming to eat less than you have in the past, remember, this is the new you, you DO eat less now, your appetite isn’t as great, you don’t seem to need as much to satisfy you anymore, perhaps you’re coming down with something (any of these statements, casually uttered should deflect the curiosity of family or friends used to the old you, if you’re the shy type and think it’s none of their business. Otherwise feel free to be loud and proud and espouse the wonders of Lap Band surgery.) locate the toilets on arrival so you know exactly where to go if you’re not concentrating on each mouth full and you need to make a hasty exit by now you should be able to judge what “tiny” mouthful means and should be back to using knife and fork ^top BMI Calculator Does my band need adjusting? Post Op Pointers Post Adjustment Rules Food Clues Inamed Lap Band Process GP Info and News What to Eat WheN - After Lap Band Surgery There is a printable version of this information available here in PDF format. The PDF version also contains some menu ideas for the different phases. In hospital straight after surgery to day 1 CLEAR FLUIDS OVERNIGHT water clear fruit juice and cordial only [*]don’t drink everything at once [*]small amounts often – 50mls every 10 minutes [*]suck on ice if thirsty or dry [*]no fizzy drinks NO SOLID FOOD - CLEAR FLUIDS ONLY VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Do NOT eat anything other than water, clear fruit juice, clear consommé, and black tea/coffee or cordial – even if it has been delivered to your room – it is probably a mistake. EATING UTENSIL Slim straw only Days 2 to 21-28 - Liquids Only LIQUIDS ONLY – small amounts frequently to keep you hydrated – 50mls every 10 minutes (up to 2 litres per day). Within a week you should be able to drink 1 cup of fluid slowly. 120 ml fruit juice 250 ml vegetable juices/ vegetable soup (pureed, thin) protein drinks reduced fat milk fully vitamised chicken/meat & vegetable soup no fizzy drinks NO SOLID FOOD - FLUIDS ONLY VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Drink small amounts often. Your new stomach pouch is small. Don’t overstretch it by drinking too much at once. Sip slowly, Small mouthfuls. If you can’t get it through a slim straw easily you can’t have it. EATING UTENSIL Slim straw only Days 21-28 to 35 - Sloppy Low Fibre Foods SLOPPY LOW FIBRE FOODS ONLY – EASILY SQUISHED THROUGH THE FINGERS - OR – THE THICKNESS OF BABY’S FIRST FOOD OR SMOOTHED MASHED POTATO turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating sip very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between sips no more than 200mls at a time 2 lite dairy/soya serves daily (1 serve= 1cup milk or 200g lite yoghurt or 35 g cheese) ½ cup pureed fruit or mashed banana puree cooked veal, pork or chicken, avoid beef (too fibrous) eat small amounts slowly but more frequently, hunger makes you eat faster avoid lobster, squid or prawns avoid home-cooked spaghetti & rice tinned spaghetti & tinned creamy rice are okay no fizzy drinks VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly and chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Low fibre fruit & vegetables only Low fibre means without the fibrous skin. Dried fruits like prunes, raisins & sultanas are also off the menu for this month. Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. SLOPPY/PUREED LOW FIBRE FOODS ONLY EATING UTENSILS MacDonald’s sized thicker straw or Teaspoon ^top Days 35- 42 - Transition Phase TRANSITION PHASE – gradually introduce solids from 5 to 6 weeks only very cautiously turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating do not increase the portion sizes you have become used to over the last 4 weeks eat very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between each mouth full cautiously introduce cooked unblended chicken or veal – 50 grams in total to begin with cautiously introduce cooked unblended vegetables cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces, then chew very well VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly Chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Cut meat into tiny pieces Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. EATING UTENSILS Teaspoon or Equivalent Size ^top What to eat for the rest of your life turn off the telephone, lock the front door, occupy the kids, totally concentrate on eating do not increase the portion sizes you have become used to over the last 4 weeks continue the further introduction of solids that you began to introduce at 5 to 6 weeks very cautiously the volume and coarseness of the food should slowly be increased over the coming weeks eat very small amounts very slowly wait for a minute between each mouth full continue to cautiously introduce cooked unblended chicken or veal – begin with 50 grams continue to cautiously introduce cooked unblended vegetables cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces, then chew very well 30 times each mouth full by about week 10 you should be at the point where you can attend a restaurant and eat an entrée sized meal in both volume and consistency – the time it takes you to eat this meal should equal the time it takes your eating partner to consume both entrée and main meal VERY IMPORTANT NOTES Eat very slowly Chew very well – 30 times each mouthful Cut meat into tiny pieces Cut fibrous vegetables into tiny pieces Drink 15 minutes or more before eating, and one hour after eating. EATING UTENSILS Teaspoon or Equivalent Size ^top Tips for Eating Out the drinking rule still applies, 15 minutes or more before eating and one hour after eating; special exception because you’re eating out, you can take tiny sips of liquid while eating while we’re on the drinking subject, for those of us who don’t mind a tipple, with the Lap Band in place alcohol will be absorbed much more quickly and therefore if consumed should be done so very slowly – remember, less is more and a lower tolerance can mean higher blood alcohol levels, so if you’re going to drink, please don’t drive just because you’re eating out, don’t decide to “make a meal of it” so to speak, and consume more than you have become used to over the last ten weeks eat one entrée sized meal only over the time it takes your eating companion to consume both entrée and main course if you don’t like the entrée choices, ask for the main meal served entrée size remember, we often eat just for taste, and not for hunger; if you remember this then savouring one tiny teaspoon of your partner’s dessert for the taste is all you really need if you’re worried about drawing attention to yourself by making the above requests, or by seeming to eat less than you have in the past, remember, this is the new you, you DO eat less now, your appetite isn’t as great, you don’t seem to need as much to satisfy you anymore, perhaps you’re coming down with something (any of these statements, casually uttered should deflect the curiosity of family or friends used to the old you, if you’re the shy type and think it’s none of their business. Otherwise feel free to be loud and proud and espouse the wonders of Lap Band surgery.) locate the toilets on arrival so you know exactly where to go if you’re not concentrating on each mouth full and you need to make a hasty exit by now you should be able to judge what “tiny” mouthful means and should be back to using knife and fork

Right guys how am I gonna do this. I got banded on Friday and although Im not 100% I feel pretty good. Son has Graduation on Friday which lasts around 1-1 1/2hours service. Then on to a hotel for champagne reception for 2 hrs, take family out for meal then back home for party 30 guests. I have got caterers in to do the food so not too worried about that. I am more concerned if I am up to it and also covering up not eating or drinking alcohol. First born has worked really hard for this degree and it was all booked before my op. He is also getting presented with a Student of distinction, so proud and I really dont want to let him down. I tire quite easily at the moment i.e. emptying dishwasher is taking twice as long and Im pretty tired. Any tips please!!! Jx

OMG Gillian, that is so spooky - I paid the same as you (but mine was top back right!) and I thought the tooth fairy would visit too but the bag didn't:mad2: I have had lots of nurofen plus and vodka - although I must say was advised against the alcohol (I never listen). I had my first Christmas dinner on Sunday as my husband goes away to work tomorrow until 27th December (his 50th birthday!!) and I had been having a whale of a time - until my tooth broke that is :-( Never mind there is still plenty of time before the 27th Jan. Hope you are feeling better. TTYL T x

Hello Friends!! Mal those pictures are just divine!!! Thank you for sharing a little bit of Colorado and the fall. I'll be there one month from TODAY!! I'm staying at the Doubletree Hotel in Aurora. My appt. is on the 9th at 9 PM. Can't wait! I've got some odd pain happening here. What is helping is Metamucil and Gas-X. I found my stomach was puffing like a puffer fish The GAX-X is nipping that right in the bud. The diverticulitis is being aided by Metimamucil. My stomach is calming down and GOING DOWN which I appreciate. I am back on toddler dinners for a meal replacement/meal (protein oriented) and then I ease into food during the day. If you have a Walgreens, their GOLDS brand protein bars are on sale buy one get one and the Propell water is $1 a bottle limit 6 (the big size). I'm feeling better though. Let's get together!!! I'm counting on it people. Really! I need that love and support and hugs from you all...please lets try and do a gathering for November. Literature Catalog This is a link to Overeaters anonymous things. I haven't found anything that wasn't useful. Therapy is still going great but I'm still shoveling manure. I know that I FEEL better though. Mentally I'm starting to come through the hazy part of the fog. From the Alcoholics Anonymous BIG BLUE BOOK Chapter 5 (which is used with Overeaters Anonymous) WISDOM “Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program.” The AABB, Chapter 5 I always believed that I had to control every aspect of my life or I would be a “less-than” person. This attitude even crept into my attempts to learn the art of watercolor still life and portraits. Even my art could not escape the effects of my character defects! In order to learn something new, I have to be willing to follow the rules of the very thing I want to learn. I shared this with an experienced artist and best friend, “I find myself still wanting to control the outcome of the colors.” “Isn’t that the way we try to control our lives? She replied. “Drop the paint where you want it to go, then drop the second color into that one and let it go! You can take your brush and guide it, but don’t mess with it!” My life is like learning to watercolor. I have to trust that doing the footwork of recovery as others have done will bring about a beautiful portrait of growth in recovery. One day at a time... I will do the footwork by making good choices, letting each build upon the other, and I will stand back to see what God will create. ~ Sharon

Dee, Feb. 9 is good for me, 6:30 or 7:00? I got this from the IRS web site: Topic 502 - Medical and Dental Expenses If you itemize your deductions on Form 1040, Schedule A (PDF), you may be able to deduct expenses you paid that year for medical care (including dental) for yourself, your spouse, and your dependents. A deduction is allowed only for expenses paid for the prevention or alleviation of a physical or mental defect or illness. Medical care expenses include payments for the diagnosis, cure, mitigation, treatment, or prevention of disease, or treatment affecting any structure or function of the body. The cost of drugs is deductible only for drugs that require a prescription, except for insulin. Medical expenses include fees paid to doctors, dentists, surgeons, chiropractors, psychiatrists, psychologists, and Christian Science practitioners. Also included are payments for hospital services, qualified long–term care services, nursing services, and laboratory fees. Payments for acupuncture treatments or inpatient treatment at a center for alcohol or drug addiction are also deductible medical expenses. You may include amounts you paid for participating in a smoking–cessation program and for drugs prescribed to alleviate nicotine withdrawal. However, you may not deduct amounts paid for nicotine gum and nicotine patches, which do not require a prescription. You may deduct the cost of participating in a weight-loss program for a specific disease or diseases, including obesity, diagnosed by a physician. You may not deduct the cost of purchasing diet food items. In addition, you may include expenses for admission and transportation to a medical conference relating to the chronic disease of yourself, your spouse, or your dependent (if the costs are primarily for and essential to the medical care). However, you may not deduct the costs for meals and lodging while attending the medical conference. The cost of items such as false teeth, prescription eyeglasses or contact lenses, laser eye surgery, hearing aids, crutches, wheelchairs, and guide dogs for the blind or deaf are deductible medical expenses. You may not deduct funeral or burial expenses, health club dues, over–the–counter medicines, toothpaste, toiletries, cosmetics, a trip or program for the general improvement of your health, or most cosmetic surgery. You may deduct transportation costs primarily for and essential to medical care that qualify as medical expenses. The actual fare for a taxi, bus, train, or ambulance can be deducted. If you use your car for medical transportation, you can deduct actual out–of–pocket expenses such as gas and oil, or you can deduct the standard mileage rate for medical expenses. With either method you may include tolls and parking fees. You may include in medical expenses the incidental cost of meals and lodging charged by the hospital or similar institution if your main reason for being there is to receive medical care. You can only include the medical expenses you paid during the year, regardless of when the services were provided. Your total medical expenses for the year must be reduced by any reimbursement. It makes no difference if you receive the reimbursement or if it is paid directly to the doctor or hospital. You may include qualified medical expenses you pay for yourself, your spouse, and your dependents, including a person you claim as a dependent under a multiple support agreement. If either parent claims a child as a dependent under the rules for divorced or separated parents, each parent may deduct the medical expenses he or she actually pays for the child. You can also deduct medical expenses you paid for someone who would have qualified as your dependent except that the person didn't meet the gross income or joint return test. You may deduct only the amount by which your total medical care expenses for the year exceed 7.5% of your adjusted gross income. You do this calculation on Form 1040 Schedule A in computing the amount deductible. Medical expenses include insurance premiums paid for accident and health or qualified long-term care insurance. You may not deduct insurance premiums for life insurance, for policies providing for loss of wages because of illness or injury, or policies that pay you a guaranteed amount each week for a sickness. In addition, the deduction for a qualified long–term care insurance policy's premium is limited. Refer to Publication 502 , Medical and Dental Expenses. You may not deduct insurance premiums paid by an employer–sponsored health insurance plan (cafeteria plan) unless the premiums are included in Box 1 of your Form W-2 (PDF). If you are self–employed and have a net profit for the year, or if you are a partner in a partnership or a shareholder in an S corporation, you may be able to deduct, as an adjustment to income, 100% of the amount you pay for medical insurance for yourself and your spouse and dependents. You can include the remaining premiums with your other medical expenses as an itemized deduction. You cannot take the special 100% deduction for any month in which you are eligible to participate in any subsidized health plan maintained by your employer or your spouse's employer. Publication 502, Medical and Dental Expenses, contains additional information.

Hey Friends! I haven't had a chance to read through today's postings so pardon me if I'm not acknowledging a success or other event. I just got back from the plastic surgeon. What I was anticipating was on the negative end but it turned out to be a positive experience. I'm sooo thrilled. I am impressed with this doctor and the visit was so productive. Much time was spent on discussing the band, diet, my body, procedures, fat deposits and what happens to the body. I felt like the education element that I see in a doctor was present in this one. What I learn: Since my last fill I have lost 2 lbs. a week. Spot on for good restriction. Now I know I gained and lost more than that but over all the average of the sum total was 2 lbs. Yay. The focus for now will be my stomach. I did not realize the various concerns with the type of skin removal that we undergo when we have large stomachs and the pennicula that hangs down. My surgeries will occur in stages. The first stage will be a partial tummy tuck, no navel involved. I'm going to lose 50 lbs before I have this done. I will probably time this surgery for Christmas. This will give me time to fly back out to Dr. K for another fill in the fall and perhaps lose more than the set goal of 50. My surgeries to get me back to a normal body will come in phases. I was STUNNED at what can be done with lipo suction. WOW. So that is my plastic surgery update. ........................................................................... There is a new section to our website here called Lapband Talk Magazine. You all know me enough to read this an recognize the who of it but I submitted it confidentially for the broader audience of this website fearing my family might jump online here and snoop and recognize it as me. Frankly I don't care now. (flying the big digit flag) Here it is along with the link: http://www.lapbandtalk.com/f201/if-you-had-no-limitations-your-life-59269/ If you had no limitations in your life If you had no limitations in your life, what would you do differently? Let me qualify that. Suppose you suddenly dropped any extra weight that prohibited you from pursuing a fuller life and you had no physical limitations, what would you do differently? Would you travel more? Explore hobbies or venture off on a new career? For years, I knew my answers; they played out in a series of vignettes in my mind. I would leave the balmy breezes of my home in Florida for the snow-dusted cityscape of the north. I would take my daughter Christmas shopping in New York City and afterwards for a Handsome Cab Ride (horse and buggy) to see the holiday lights throughout the city. That was my dream for her 16th birthday she is now 24. I would fly to Prince Edward Island, Nova Scotia with my son and walk the rolling hills that overlook the ocean. That was something we planned the summer after his 4th grade year he is in college now. I would join my husband on his annual winter adventure of snow skiing. We have been married 25 years. He still skis but I have never gone with him. All of these activities require strength in my legs and back, endurance to remain mobile and there would be no guarantee of a place to sit my 389-pound frame. Being severely morbidly obese, I knew the reality of feeling breathless by simply walking from my car to the aisles just inside the grocery store. I would soon be leaning on the cart handle to alleviate the strain on my limbs. Once, I tested my limits and pushed further along the concourse of our local mall until I was half clutching myself back to the parking lot and collapsing into the driver's seat. With the majority of my weight over my abdomen, years of accumulated fat forced the abundant mass downward, hanging from my body so that when I walked, it swung like a pendulum. To sustain myself on my own feet for any length of time under such physical stress was painful and short term. Travel? I did not feel it was possible. I knew my dreams remained just that. Dreams. So how did I get this fat? “You’re SO fat you brought a spoon to the Super Bowl” In high school, I was a trim 130 and a size nine. I was one of those persons who made fun of fat people. I judged them as weak with no self-control (those feelings would change). Eating disorders were a part of the fabric of my family. My grandmother would binge and purge and I recognized the foul odor in the bathroom at home after my mother came out as being the same thing. The excuse passed on to the next generation, “I’m feeling a little sick.” after a large meal. My older sister would be next only she was supplementing her diet with alcohol and cigarettes. The exposure to seeing wet debris left on too many toilet seats made me unable to get to that point when the weight started creeping up on me. “Girl, you sure ain’t missed a meal!” After the birth of my daughter, I had gained an additional 40 pounds and by the time my son was born, it was 80 pounds. My appearance was less of a concern as I busied myself with two little ones and began college. By the time I was working full-time, I found myself avoiding people from my past feeling too ashamed of my appearance and what others would think of me. I found that out at one of the few family gatherings I managed to attend when someone associated with my southern family shouted from across the yard, “Girl, you sure ain’t missed a meal!”. On April 17, 1990 my father died. After the death of my Dad, there was so much anguish in me emotionally that it only fueled the self-depreciation I felt for myself. I had little pride no matter how esteemed my accomplishments and these thoughts were only reinforced by events that surrounded me. I deserved this and other ridicule because my family would have otherwise defended me. Right? There is fat, there is obese, there is morbidly obese, there is severely morbidly obese then there is cutting the doorway to get you out of the building. Let me tell you the difference, nothing. Any amount of weight that impedes your life function is physically impairing and those labels mean nothing when there is physical impairment. I developed rashes in the folds of my skin and only the real high-end soaps prevented an outbreak. Where I use to get catcalls of appreciation for my appearance I was only hearing ‘you have such a pretty face’ followed by silence and a glance downward at my frame. If this was supposed to make me feel better, it did not. I once got a note in my mailbox at work with an ad for a diet supplement and a coupon. I received a phone call from someone I knew years before who I passed in glancing at the store a few weeks earlier. They were now in a multi-level marketing business and gushed endlessly about how, like a pilgrimage to Lourdes, one of their products could cure me of my obesity. I tried things on my own, I joined weight loss clubs, bought pills, liquids, and books, started walking, joined a gym, quit the gym, joined again, and started every Monday with the words, “I start my diet today”. Pennicula like peninsula only human. There came a point in my life where shame lost its voice and ‘Big Mama Bravado’ came forward. It was just me and the scale, me tending to the blisters under my pennicula, the access skin that hangs down from your stomach, where I had gotten a toilet seat chemical burn from sitting on the toilet with my stomach hanging over the rim. It was me clutching the walls first thing in the morning until I got my footing, me walking on the sides of my feet because my arches were cracking and ME looking at ME in the mirror before and after I showered. I had long since had a rule with my husband of ‘no nudity with the lights on’ but there I would stand, unclothed, with the only person I could truly be open with - myself. I started therapy for compulsive overeating and was encouraged to journal my feelings. The more I wrote, the more I felt. The more I felt, the deeper the pain, the deeper the pain I allowed myself to feel the stronger I got. It was in the middle of a one-year post follow-up for Type II Diabetes when my physician leveled with me. My weight was impacting my health and it was only a matter of time before a stroke or heart attack. He was being honest with me and I could not argue with him, I needed help or the conclusion was apparent. It was during that visit he told me about a new gastric procedure and encouraged me to explore it. I left his office, went directly across the street to the hospital to the bariatric department, and met the nurse overseeing the program for gastric surgery. I believe that all things happen for a reason. There are no such things as mistakes and that, like Edith Wharton said, “In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy sorrow, on can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.” Despite all of the debilitating consequences of my obesity, I remained determined. I would find a way out. After months of pre-surgical testing (sleep apnea-positive, chemically induced heart stress test, psychological evaluation) my health insurance denied my request. There was an exclusion in my insurance plan that would not cover bariatric surgery: “Weight Control Services including any service to lose, gain or maintain weight regardless of the reason for the service or whether the service is part of a treatment plan for a Condition. This exclusion includes, but is not limited to weight control/loss programs; appetite suppressants and other medications; dietary regimens; food or food supplements; exercise programs; exercise or other equipment; gastric or stomach bypass or stapling, intestinal bypass, gastric balloons, jaw wiring, jejunal bypass, gastric shunts, and procedures designed to restrict the Covered Person's ability to assimilate food.” This exclusion did not simply apply to me but also to persons who are anorexic, the opposite of my problem. The Big Mama Bravado in me drafted a letter of appeals for my denial, DENIED, a second letter, nude photos included, still denied, and an appeal to the State Office of Insurance Regulation. I could not reason in my mind how an insurance company could direct the coverage over the recommendation of several physicians and their patient but it was, in fact, true. They could and did. Big Mama was undaunted and I went shopping for my surgery. Let me tell you how empowering this is. You call the shots. You have the cash, you can go wherever you can afford. I had never experienced that but it was truly a powerful feeling of knowing I finally had a voice in WHO and WHAT and WHERE. I was looking for price and quality and I found it in Aurora, Colorado. Another part of my thinking was the question of; where would I like to go for frequent vacations? Going from Florida to the beautiful Rocky Mountains was a no-brainer. The Lap Band Rockies and Dr. Kirshenbaum was an affordable cost saver intended to keep U.S. patients stateside where medical care is under stricter guidelines. I researched my doctor and discovered he had performed thousands of laparoscopic surgeries. This quelled any fears I had about complications, as I knew I would be flying back to Florida post my surgery. The procedure is done on an outpatient basis. Paying for the surgery myself, (why not? We make car payments without even flinching) I had my surgery date, April 17, 2007; the anniversary of my father’s passing. I knew it was a sign. April 17, 2008 It is one year since my surgery. I am off my Diabetes medication and my numbers remain good. I can walk from my car to the store and shop, checkout and drive home without getting winded. I still have a long journey ahead but I am so many (painless steps) closer to seeing my goals. There have been four amazing trips to Denver and friendships of other ‘banditos’. I am two sizes smaller and one shoe size smaller and more than anything I have hope. Hope for journeys to faraway shores, to carriage rides and city lights and the feel of snow blowing like sand across the crest of a mountain. I dream of possibilities and for the first time in too long, I believe they will become a reality. __________________

Oh, and BTW, my foot hurts worse than it has in weeks after getting the alcohol injection. So much for it feeling 50% better after the first shot. Sigh.....

dee,put my goal as 10.....again. my eating has been all screwed up, not portionwise but not nearly enough protein and often too much alcohol....arghhh getting excited to see you and others in little over a week!

Denver: hope all went well today. i know i can hardly believe it has been only two weeks since my surgery. I have felt fine since leaving the hospital!! I bet you will too. Tucker update: Just got back from seeing him today. He has to be on oxygen and IV nourishment (he won't eat). Good news (?) although the pneumonia is worse today than yesterday, it wasn't as bad as dr. thought it was going to be (new radiographs...is that newspeak for xrays?). I bawled through my entire visit with him. His sides and chest are shaved; he has tubes going in everywhere; he pants really hard. It's killin' me. Dr. will call again tonight after rounds. Food is the last thing on my mind these days. Now alcohol, that's another story. I want so badly to drink beer, but I did manage to down a bottle of wine last evening..I know...bad choice as Dr. K says:sad:....oh, well...

hey marcy, you are having surgery on my birthday...woo hoooo I had surgery on Jan 29th and am down 61 pounds so far. Don't worry about gaining...just concentrate, imo, on making healthier choices. That is a must after surgery. Just like alcoholic, I can't be around the "good stuff", I have to choose to do the right thing. Best wishes girl, best thing I have ever done in my whole life!!!

Hey,I was on another thread and someone posted this link...I copied it becaue it was good info. Sorry it's long, but it's pretty good! How to Tell When You Are Perfectly Adjusted You are losing 1-2 pounds per week. If you are not losing 1-2 pounds per week: A. You may need an eating adjustment 1. Are you eating 60 grams of protein a day 2. Are you eating 25 grams of fiber 3. Are you avoiding all liquid calories a. Soup can be sign of “soft calorie syndrome” b. Alcohol contains a lot of calories – 7 calories per gram (1) It’s also a stomach irritant c. Fruit juice is just sugar water 4. Are you making healthy food choices from a wide variety of foods? a. Are you avoiding soft foods b. You can’t just eat what’s easy c. Cheese is glorified fat 5. Are you drinking 6-8 glasses of water a day between meals 6. Are you eating too much junk a. Chips, chocolate, nuts, ice cream, cookies and other highly processed junk foods are too calorically dense to be regular parts of a healthy diet. But don’t avoid them completely to the point where you feel deprived. b. Stay out of fast food places 7. Are you getting in two servings of calcium daily 8. Do you always eat the protein first 9. Then the vegetables or fruits a. Five servings a day b. Potatoes are NOT a vegetable 10. Is your portion size appropriate? a. Meat or fish (1) 3 ounces – the size of a deck of cards b. Vegetables (1) ½ cup – the size of your fist c. Starch (1) If you eat the protein and the vegetables first you don’t need much (2) Avoid: rice, potatoes, pasta 11. You might try avoiding artificial sweeteners a. Some people think that artificial sweeteners stimulate the appetite b. They are HUNDREDS of times sweeter than sugar c. They teach you to like things too sweet d. There is no evidence that people who use them are any thinner than people who don’t 12. Avoid most diet foods a. Real food usually tastes better b. Real food is more satisfying than low calorie substitutes c. When you are only eating a tiny bit the caloric savings is not that great (1) Use a teaspoon of real butter instead of a tablespoon of diet margarine (2) The body has no way to break down artificial fats a. They may go into permanent storage b. Some people think liposuction is the only way to remove hydrolyzed fats from the body B. You may need a behavior adjustment 1. Are you eating only when you are hungry? a. If you’re not sure drink 8 ounces of water and wait. 2. Are you eating three meals a day? a. With maybe 1 or 2 small snacks 3. Are you sitting down to eat? 4. Are you eating consciously? a. No distractions, turn off the TV, put the book or newspaper away, pay attention to your food and your companions 5. Are you eating slowly? a. Put the fork down between bites b. Take 20 to 30 minutes to finish a meal c. Taking longer might cause the pouch to begin emptying 6. Are you taking small bites? a. Tiny spoon, chopsticks, cocktail fork 7. Are you chewing well? 8. Are you drinking with your meals or too soon after your meals? a. Practice water loading between meals b. You won’t be thirsty if you are well hydrated before the meal 9. Are you stopping at the first sign of fullness? a. Sometimes it’s a whisper: not hungry, had enough b. Hard stop versus soft stop 10. Do not eat between meals. Stop grazing. 11. Do not eat when you are not hungry C. You may need an activity adjustment 1. Are you getting in 30 minutes of physical activity at least 3 times a week? a. Over and above what you would do in the usual course of your day b. Could you make it 4 or 5 times a week? c. Could you make it 45 or 60 minutes? 2. Are you taking advantage of opportunities to increase your physical activity? a. Taking the stairs instead of the elevators or escalators b. Walking on the escalators instead of riding c. Parking your car further away from the entrance d. Getting out of the car instead of using the drive through e. Getting off the bus one stop before your destination f. Washing you car by hand instead of the car wash g. Playing with your kids D. You may need an attitude adjustment 1. Are you committed to your weight loss journey? 2. Are you totally honest with yourself about how much you are eating and exercising? a. Log your food and activity on ww.fitday.com for 3 days 3. Are you using food inappropriately to deal with emotional issues? a. Have you identified what the emotions are that drive your eating? b. Can you think of more appropriate ways to deal with those emotions? c. Are you willing to seek help from a qualified counselor? 4. Are you attending and participating in support group meetings? 5. Have you drummed up some support from your family and friends? 6. Have you dealt with saboteurs realistically? 7. Do you have realistic expectations about the weight loss journey? 8. Are you still obsessing about food, weight, dieting, eating? a. Obsessive – compulsive thoughts (1) Obsess about something else b. Perfectionism (1) All or none, black and white thinking c. Patience with the pace of healthy weight loss 9. Are you acknowledging your successes with non-food rewards? 10. Have you learned how to take a compliment? 11. Are you giving up diet mentality? a. Stop weighing yourself several times a day or every day b. Stop dieting c. Stop depriving yourself d. Stop defining food as “good” and “bad” e. Stop rewarding and punishing yourself with food 12. How do you feel about all the changes taking place? E. You may need a band adjustment 1. You feel like you are making healthy food choices in appropriate portion sizes but getting hungry between meals? 2. You can still eat white bread, fibrous vegetables and large portions. 3. You are having to struggle to lose 4. You are gaining weight in spite of eating right, exercising and having a good mind set. F. You may need your band loosened 1. There are times when you can’t get fluids down 2. You are vomiting too much a. How much is too much? 3. Do you have frequent reflux or heartburn at night? a. Do not lie flat or bend over soon after eating b. Do not eat late at night or just before bedtime c. Rinse your pouch with a glass or water an hour before bedtime d. Certain foods or drinks are more likely to cause reflux: (1) Rich, spicy, fatty and fried foods (2) Chocolate (3) Caffeine (4) Alcohol (5) Some fruits and vegetables a. Oranges, lemons, tomatoes, peppers (6) Peppermint a. Baking soda toothpaste (7) Carbonated drinks e. Eat slowly and do not eat big meals f. If you smoke, quit smoking g. Reduce stress h. Exercise promotes digestion i. Raise the head of your bed j. Wear loose fitting clothing around your waist k. Stress increases reflux l. Take estrogen containing medications in the morning m. Avoid aspirin, Aleve and ibuprofen at bedtime (1) Tylenol is OK n. Take an antacid (Pepcid complete) before retiring o. Try other over-the-counter heartburn medications p. See your health care provider 4. See your health care provider immediately (or call 911) if a. You have a squeezing, tightness or heaviness in your chest, especially if the discomfort spreads to your shoulder, arm or jaw or is accompanied by shortness of breath, sweating, irregular or fast heartbeat or nausea. These could be symptoms of a heart attack. b. If your symptoms are triggered by exercise. c. If your pain localizes to your right side, especially if you also have nausea or fever d. If you throw up vomit that looks like black sand or coffee grounds. Or if your stool is black, deep red or looks like it has tar in it. These are symptoms of bleeding and need immediate attention. (Note: Pepto-Bismol or other medications with bismuth will turn your stool black. Iron supplements can also make the stool tarry.) e. If your pain is severe This was written by Jessie H. Ahroni, Ph.D., A.R.N.P., C.D.E., B.C.-A.D.M.

Book~here is some info about fills, I think you might need an adjustment. I had an appointment for today at 4:45 that I had to cancel, maybe it is still available??? Let us know how it goes. Adjustments How to Tell When You Are Perfectly Adjusted You are losing 1-2 pounds per week. If you are not losing 1-2 pounds per week: A. You may need an eating adjustment 1. Are you eating 60 grams of protein a day 2. Are you eating 25 grams of fiber 3. Are you avoiding all liquid calories a. Soup can be sign of “soft calorie syndrome” b. Alcohol contains a lot of calories – 7 calories per gram (1) It’s also a stomach irritant c. Fruit juice is just sugar water 4. Are you making healthy food choices from a wide variety of foods? a. Are you avoiding soft foods b. You can’t just eat what’s easy c. Cheese is glorified fat 5. Are you drinking 6-8 glasses of water a day between meals 6. Are you eating too much junk a. Chips, chocolate, nuts, ice cream, cookies and other highly processed junk foods are too calorically dense to be regular parts of a healthy diet. But don’t avoid them completely to the point where you feel deprived. b. Stay out of fast food places 7. Are you getting in two servings of calcium daily 8. Do you always eat the protein first 9. Then the vegetables or fruits a. Five servings a day b. Potatoes are NOT a vegetable 10. Is your portion size appropriate? a. Meat or fish (1) 3 ounces – the size of a deck of cards b. Vegetables (1) ½ cup – the size of your fist c. Starch (1) If you eat the protein and the vegetables first you don’t need much (2) Avoid: rice, potatoes, pasta 11. You might try avoiding artificial sweeteners a. Some people think that artificial sweeteners stimulate the appetite b. They are HUNDREDS of times sweeter than sugar c. They teach you to like things too sweet d. There is no evidence that people who use them are any thinner than people who don’t 12. Avoid most diet foods a. Real food usually tastes better b. Real food is more satisfying than low calorie substitutes c. When you are only eating a tiny bit the caloric savings is not that great (1) Use a teaspoon of real butter instead of a tablespoon of diet margarine (2) The body has no way to break down artificial fats a. They may go into permanent storage b. Some people think liposuction is the only way to remove hydrolyzed fats from the body B. You may need a behavior adjustment 1. Are you eating only when you are hungry? a. If you’re not sure drink 8 ounces of water and wait. 2. Are you eating three meals a day? a. With maybe 1 or 2 small snacks 3. Are you sitting down to eat? 4. Are you eating consciously? a. No distractions, turn off the TV, put the book or newspaper away, pay attention to your food and your companions 5. Are you eating slowly? a. Put the fork down between bites b. Take 20 to 30 minutes to finish a meal c. Taking longer might cause the pouch to begin emptying 6. Are you taking small bites? a. Tiny spoon, chopsticks, cocktail fork 7. Are you chewing well? 8. Are you drinking with your meals or too soon after your meals? a. Practice water loading between meals b. You won’t be thirsty if you are well hydrated before the meal 9. Are you stopping at the first sign of fullness? a. Sometimes it’s a whisper: not hungry, had enough b. Hard stop versus soft stop 10. Do not eat between meals. Stop grazing. 11. Do not eat when you are not hungry C. You may need an activity adjustment 1. Are you getting in 30 minutes of physical activity at least 3 times a week? a. Over and above what you would do in the usual course of your day b. Could you make it 4 or 5 times a week? c. Could you make it 45 or 60 minutes? 2. Are you taking advantage of opportunities to increase your physical activity? a. Taking the stairs instead of the elevators or escalators b. Walking on the escalators instead of riding c. Parking your car further away from the entrance d. Getting out of the car instead of using the drive through e. Getting off the bus one stop before your destination f. Washing you car by hand instead of the car wash g. Playing with your kids D. You may need an attitude adjustment 1. Are you committed to your weight loss journey? 2. Are you totally honest with yourself about how much you are eating and exercising? a. Log your food and activity on ww.fitday.com for 3 days 3. Are you using food inappropriately to deal with emotional issues? a. Have you identified what the emotions are that drive your eating? b. Can you think of more appropriate ways to deal with those emotions? c. Are you willing to seek help from a qualified counselor? 4. Are you attending and participating in support group meetings? 5. Have you drummed up some support from your family and friends? 6. Have you dealt with saboteurs realistically? 7. Do you have realistic expectations about the weight loss journey? 8. Are you still obsessing about food, weight, dieting, eating? a. Obsessive – compulsive thoughts (1) Obsess about something else b. Perfectionism (1) All or none, black and white thinking c. Patience with the pace of healthy weight loss 9. Are you acknowledging your successes with non-food rewards? 10. Have you learned how to take a compliment? 11. Are you giving up diet mentality? a. Stop weighing yourself several times a day or every day b. Stop dieting c. Stop depriving yourself d. Stop defining food as “good” and “bad” e. Stop rewarding and punishing yourself with food 12. How do you feel about all the changes taking place? E. You may need a band adjustment 1. You feel like you are making healthy food choices in appropriate portion sizes but getting hungry between meals? 2. You can still eat white bread, fibrous vegetables and large portions. 3. You are having to struggle to lose 4. You are gaining weight in spite of eating right, exercising and having a good mind set. F. You may need your band loosened 1. There are times when you can’t get fluids down 2. You are vomiting too much a. How much is too much? 3. Do you have frequent reflux or heartburn at night? a. Do not lie flat or bend over soon after eating b. Do not eat late at night or just before bedtime c. Rinse your pouch with a glass or water an hour before bedtime d. Certain foods or drinks are more likely to cause reflux: (1) Rich, spicy, fatty and fried foods (2) Chocolate (3) Caffeine (4) Alcohol (5) Some fruits and vegetables a. Oranges, lemons, tomatoes, peppers (6) Peppermint a. Baking soda toothpaste (7) Carbonated drinks e. Eat slowly and do not eat big meals f. If you smoke, quit smoking g. Reduce stress h. Exercise promotes digestion i. Raise the head of your bed j. Wear loose fitting clothing around your waist k. Stress increases reflux l. Take estrogen containing medications in the morning m. Avoid aspirin, Aleve and ibuprofen at bedtime (1) Tylenol is OK n. Take an antacid (Pepcid complete) before retiring o. Try other over-the-counter heartburn medications p. See your health care provider 4. See your health care provider immediately (or call 911) if a. You have a squeezing, tightness or heaviness in your chest, especially if the discomfort spreads to your shoulder, arm or jaw or is accompanied by shortness of breath, sweating, irregular or fast heartbeat or nausea. These could be symptoms of a heart attack. b. If your symptoms are triggered by exercise. c. If your pain localizes to your right side, especially if you also have nausea or fever d. If you throw up vomit that looks like black sand or coffee grounds. Or if your stool is black, deep red or looks like it has tar in it. These are symptoms of bleeding and need immediate attention. (Note: Pepto-Bismol or other medications with bismuth will turn your stool black. Iron supplements can also make the stool tarry.) e. If your pain is severe This was written by Jessie H. Ahroni, Ph.D., A.R.N.P., C.D.E., B.C.-A.D.M.

Good Evening Gang It's already 8 and I haven't eaten and I'm Hungry - Had boot camp tonite - so this is going to be a run on and in no order post Eva LOL on the turn my closet into a bedroom LOL I would but too many clothest LOL... Yep I have never had company for a week ;0) - I made up a spreadsheet of food and what we will or might do - and they are laughing at me - Well I like to be prepared that's all - I make up spreadsheets when I am going on a trip on what to pack - or I get all confused and mixed up - so I make list ;0).. Fills - Band - Eating - IMHO I think that some pple rely too much on fills and not what they are eating - and the fact that we are only suppose to eat like 1 cup food - then we think - omg how can I survive on 1 cup food - I'm full yes - but I only ate 1 cup of food - hell normal skinny pple eat more than that.. I know I myself have a problem with that - Also finding sweet spot for some w/the band is almost impossible - that's one of the pitfalls of the band vs other WLS.. I think regardless on how tight we are or aren't we do know how to eat around it and most of us have at one time or another.. It's all about eating healthy Melissa - Glad you are going to the shrink - I think you really do need to talk to someone in person - what I am the most concerned about is your diabites and your sugar intake - not your weight issues - your medical conditions are very serious and they are going to kill you - there was an artical in the paper the other day - diabetic have 10 yrs less life span than non-diabetics.. I don't want you dieing.... Ok gang - i was going to say more - but it's now almost 8:30 - I gotta put food in my tummy haven't eaten since lunch and that was chicken soup.. Meredith good luck at the doctors tomorrow - do they know iff your band went back in place.. Hugs I bet you are starving.. Oh I know pple who arent catholic and give up stuff for lent - I thought that was funny - but I'm Catholic - and I have never followed that give up something - I am going to curb my shopping though - it's out of hand.. What is codependency? What's the definition? There are many definitions used to talk about codependency today. The original concept of codependency was developed to acknowledge the responses and behaviors people develop from living with an <A href="http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/dir/alcoholism-self-help/" target=_self>alcoholic or substance abuser. A number of attributes can be developed as a result of those conditions. However, over the years, codependency has expanded into a definition which describes a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem solving developed during childhood by family rules. One of many definitions of codependency is: a set of *maladaptive, *compulsive behaviors learned by family members in order to survive in a family which is experiencing *great emotional pain and stress. *maladaptive - inability for a person to develop behaviors which get needs met. *compulsive - psychological state where a person acts against their own will or conscious desires in which to behave. *sources of great emotional pain and stress - chemical dependency; chronic mental illness; chronic physical illness; physical abuse; sexual abuse; emotional abuse; divorce; hypercritical or non-loving environment. As adults, codependent people have a greater tendency to get involved in "toxic relationships", in other words with people who are perhaps unreliable, emotionally unavailable, or needy. And the codependent person tries to provide and control everything within the relationship without addressing their own needs or desires; setting themselves up for continued unfulfillment. Even when a codependent person encounters someone with healthy boundaries, the codependent person still operates in their own system; they're not likely to get too involved with people who have healthy boundaries. This of course creates problems that continue to recycle; if codependent people can't get involved with people who have healthy behaviors and coping skills, then the problems continue into each new relationship. back

I weighed at WW. I lost 2lbs. Now that is two of the ten I gained since Vegas, but I'll take it. Lori, we booked the cruise for several reasons. I want to go on the new ship Magic.....we want to go to Belize......DH always takes off at Christmas .........and I want a Christmas Break. It just so happens that two of my kids are going on a vacation at the same time. Now, if something happens between now and then we can always cancel. We are doing Christmas on Thanksgiving. I think it will be a nice change. We do Thanksgiving at my house every other year. I think we will do the same with Christmas. That way the kids can go to the in-laws on Christmas too. Our family is up to around 25. It is fun, but a lot of chaos. I think we are also going to scale down the gift giving. I have all my decorations down......now to pack. It shouldn't take too long. Tina, so sorry you are having problems. I think the medication will really help. Also try to get out and walk. It really clears your head, and make you feel healthier. Take it from someone who detested exercise. I just feel so much better. Peaches, I just loved the poem......thanks! Cheri, being a child of an alcoholic I have read many codependency books. Ugh! I just wish I would have not been such an enabler. It really hurt my kids. Jodi, I will be bored with you on Friday. I don't go out on New Years......too many crazies on the rode. We don't have mass transit like NY. Everyone drives down here......and some should not be allowed to drive anything!!! I think the Houston area has most DUIs in Texas. Crazy! Meredith........get well soon! Sorry, I only read the posts on this page......Later! I better get to packing!

TGIF! I'm so glad it's the weekend. I'm having a good week with food. Went for a doc appt yesterday and went down on the scale - finally! He still won't put a fill in so I'm working on my "behavioral issues". Day 3 of no sugar... except maybe alcohol if I have it. So far so good. On another scary note, I ran into a woman I have gotten to know at our monthly support groups. She's had the band a year and already it has eroded so it was removed. She is devastated. Doc said he won't put another one in. I felt so bad for her. Anyway, have a great weekend everyone. Kathy

CRS. Don't be offended if I don't respond to everyone. Arlene-happy B-day. My year to turn 60 also. Dec. 30. Great--baby will be fine. Joyce--like everyone else, had no idea you broke your elbow. You and my dad. I have a screw in mine. Apples--hugs, with that much snow why aren't you still in Arizona? Can't farm! Melissa--I have a feeling you won't stop eating till you deal with some of your codependency issues. Don't be offended, we're all codependents in various stages of recovery. Standing up to your husband--but also giving him consistent messages will help. Ask him if he would wave a bottle of booze under the nose of an alcoholic. I also think he's placing enormous pressure on you to carry the burden of working full time and providing insurance in a time and economy where that's almost impossible. The reality is, you're not going to find a full-time job with insurance unless you go back to school and upgrade your skills. Or are you the one putting that pressure on yourself to provide that? Instead, you're so stressed out you're ending up costing a lot of out-of-pocket money on your medical needs. Maybe your DH needs to take an extra job to cover insurance. However, someone posted that ultimately you are responsible for your own health and what you put in your mouth. Are you sure you aren't rebelling against all the expectations on you by putting your own health at risk? Take control of your life and of your food. Easier said than done. But ultimately, it's the only way. Sorry if I'm being too up front with you. I'm just especially aware of how fleeting life is. Don't waste it. Meredith, I'd like to know what to put in my increasingly curly frizzy hard to manage hair. Don't think a bush whacking will take care of it. I'm talking over the counter. Also will be posting the funniest post my daughter's best friend put on her page in response to my request for jokes. Cheri

Just get me to the plane in time for my ride home. Actually, I did get sick from drinking 1 time. My first husband and I were at my uncle and aunt's house in Milwaukee (both of whom turned out to be confirmed alcoholics-they divorced after she tried to set the bed on fire-with him in it). We hadn't had lunch and they took us to a brewery where we sampled the beer. Then we went to their house and sipped on wine well into the evening before they grilled some brats soaked in beer. I think I had one Southern Comfort Manhatten thrown in there too. Next morning, bright and early, with the sun shining in through uncovered windows, I finally gave up trying to sleep and went in the bathroom and stuck my fingers down my throat. The brats hadn't digested-just pickled. TMI I know, but funny. I actually told that story at my uncle's intervention. My husband, who ended up with an alcohol problem himself, started drinking Southern Comfort a lot after that. I had a five month old baby with me and I decided I'd never again drink that much. I don't think she liked the taste of my breast milk the next day either. So that's my drunk story. Once in a while I don't mind getting a nice buzz if I'm not driving anywhere. But I am not at all fond of headaches and throwing up. Cheri

Janet.......have a great vacation with the family. We will miss you! Cheri......sound like you had an awesome Thanksgiving with the family. My extended family is full of dysfunction.......mainly alcoholism. I still love to see them and remember good times as children. Apples, have a great time at your Christmas get- together with the family. Laura.......so sorry about your dad. It is so hard to watch our loved ones suffer with so much pain. I know you are such a comfort to them. HUGS! and Prayers for you and family. Chris......I hope your DW is bettter today......scary! Sham......It is hard to make that guess on your dress size. I think you go down a size every twenty lbs. Be sure you get a dress that can be altered several sizes. Kelly.....congrats on the first meal. If you felt full for several hours it sounds like you may be just where you need to be. Okay gang, I offered to babysit my two granddaughters while DD and her husband go do some shopping. I will be busy today. I am back to journaling, and looking forward to a fill on the 9th.

Janet, I've eliminated the bad carbs but picked up some things with complex carbs. Atkins has some surprisingly good things. Their Daybreak Chocolate Chip Crisp Bar has 0 gram sugar, 10g Protein, only 3g net carbs. Atkins only counts the carbs that shoot up your blood sugar (hi glycemic) as carbs that count toward total carb count. The bar does have 6 g. fiber-most of it soluble because its made from soy and oats. I still have to take my Miralax everyday--more than ever--because fiber makes me constipated--and the gas is unbelievable. Doesn't matter how much liquid I ingest. I also found an Atkins candy bar called Endulge, only a couple of carbs, they use the sugar alcohols that don't raise your blood sugar so net carbs are very low. Tastes a lot like a 3 musketeers/milky way and it has protein and fiber. One of each of these a day seems to really take care of my cravings while keeping my carbs low. I'm more into keeping my carbs low and my protein high than into total calories. I add some vegetables and a little fruit. Both the Atkins products really fill me up. We'll see if they help with the weight loss, but they do add fiber and no simple carbs. And they taste good. Took over an hour walk today. Yesterday no walk. Spent my day and night with various children--which does give you exercise. Cheri

Tina, I'm the one with ADHD, Candice is the one with bi-polar, and Jessica has something else. I've had situational depression (I was married to an alcoholic) and my physical limitations and pain from the osteoarthritis I have. I have gone to counseling, couple's counseling, group counseling, OA, Alanon, and I forget what else. I have read just about every book published on codependancy. I have been on anti-depressants and on meds for ADHD. I am currently looking at getting back on the ADHD meds in order to help me not use food to medicate the ADHD and also to help me focus enough to keep teaching and handle my aging parents and take more responsibility for our finances. My first marriage didn't make it but I learned a lot from it. I chose to learn about myself and what I needed to do to become healthier emotionally. I learned that I couldn't save the marriage myself and that couple's counseling was ineffective if only one person was genuinely trying to change while the other spent all the time blaming me for everything. Codependancy is a huge co-factor of obesity, so you and your partner do need to work on yourselves. Sounds like your partner has major co-dependancy issues and is trying to change and let you get yourself better. So do it. Cheri

What card? I never got a card. I will have to call the dr. office on Monday and see about one. I was supposed to get a card to show for eating out too. I forgot all about getting it. I had to live with my parents during the week when I moved to the country and still worked in Houston. HATED IT!!!! My mother is a saint, but even earthly saints have a few flaws. My dad, well, he was an alcoholic, nuff said. And of course, I was pregnant with #3 so I was no sweet thing either. MY DS has been here a month today.......I probably have seen him six times. I think he is moving completely out before the 1st. Now, my oldest DD told me she rented an apartment and is moving out of her home ( it is for sale). I am glad to hear that news. She won't be moving in after DS moves out. Whew! Linda, I know what you mean about feeling guilty when your kids get overweight. All of mine are overweight. I know I did not teach them the proper way to eat and put them on the pathway to obesity. They are adults now, and they know the right way. It is their choice. My oldest had lap band and lost 120 and gained it back. He has now lost 50 on Quick Weight Loss. The DS living with us eats a lot, but works out a lot. He like food too. My DD that just had the baby has a major weight problem, but she wants to start eating right. Her DH cooks and is skinny. She does have support. Janet, so sorry for DS problems. They still want to talk to mama. My DS that was in the service would call me from Germany when him and his wife were fighting. Sometimes she would call. What was I to do?......I was thousands of miles away. I would just listen. Then I would get on my soap box. Then they probably questioned why they called in the first place. lol. Heck, if they are going to call and whine.........I'm gonna preach!!!! That'll cure em!!! Lori, I am glad today looks better. I hope you enjoy your party tonight. Cheri, I haven't flown alone in many, many years. I too, am very anxious about my flight, but I have been telling myself this is something I have to do. We will have this victory......call it a NSV! Eva, You ready for a roommate? I will be there soon!!! Julie......Are you feeling better??

So sorry about your DD. My first husband had issues with alcohol. I found attending 12-step meetings to be very beneficial. The Lord bless and keep you.

I have a little thing I do that really has worked for me. I usually don't get stuck often. Has happened twice with Eva since we've been here. Gabbing, one extra bite and it might hit. I put my fists into my armpits and pump like I am doing the chicken dance. Granted, you might not want to do this in the middle of a restaurant...head to ladies room or outside. It most always works for me and no food popping back up. Sorry for your mom's continuted troubles. Hugs. Apples, I got a great visual on that. Would pay $ to see that. Wish I were with you and Eva and Janet and Phyll. West Coast reunion. Hope you all can make it to the Midwest reunion. Laura, I've not had any Tramadol now for two days. Didn't like the fact that I kept waking up at night. Very relaxed from muscle relaxer but figured something was in the Tramadol just like Vicodin. Plus, it wasn't working that well on my pain. Supplemented my regular anti-inflammatory with arthritis strength acetiminophen and got more relief. I've also been hanging from my inversion table which has been slowly stretching out the spine and surrounding muscles and relieving the pain in my neck, lower back and hip. So, no trouble getting off the Tramadol. Been on liquids for two days. Protein drinks and SF pudding. Love the new Jello chocolate SF Mousse. They have choc. mint, too. Unfortunately, SF means sugar alcohols which means lots of gas. Amazing how the weight is melting off. Hopefully, with soft Proteins tomorrow and then the harder proteins I hope the carb cravings are gone. When I think about what I went through before and after the surgery because I was so determined to get the band and shrink my liver enough to get the 1 incision surgery. I gritted my way through liquid diets and then gradual reintroduction of food, then Bandster Hell while I hung on by my fingernails until I could get to my first fill, which wasn't enough, and then the second fill and adjusting to that. Then getting to goal and beyond. Reached one year of having the weight off last month. A year ago I had my feet knocked out from under me and had all kinds of body pain and limited movement while I healed. Stuck to my food plan. Didn't gain and eventually lost more. Back up to where I was last January but I'll be dipped if I'll go any higher and I'm determined to get back down and stay there. I don't want my clothes to not fit. I don't want to buy a bigger size. I like being in size 10 pants. I like wearing a large in tops and some mediums. I want to be able to walk all over Europe on my tour and sing my heart out and totally enjoy myself. I don't want to go back on blood pressure meds or increase my cholesterol and pain meds. I want my eighth grade students to continue to think that I'm a "beast" in my leggings. I want to be able to play with my grandkids. I want to be able to dance with my husband. I wanted to be able to look down and see my feet. All the reasons for losing weight are still valid as reasons for keeping it off. I think all of us need to list the reasons we went through the torture of getting the band and why we wanted to lose the weight. Some of us are at our ultimate goal and some of us have settled for major improvements. And that's OK. But if don't want to end up back where we started we have to stay hungry, not for food, but for a healthier, more manageable life. For many of us, this time of year is the hardest. We don't see the sun, we can't get outside, it's hard to get to where we can enjoy exercising. So this is the time to remember how far we've come and why we've come this far. Cheri

Miranda, thanks for what you wrote.. I throw food out all the time now.. I make it for some reason or other and if DH doesn't eat the leftovers fast enough I throw it out... He never knows the difference.... Or I do send stuff to my kids or whomever, too.. I love rice pudding........the kind that is cooked on the stove very slowly and is so creamy and delicious.. DH doesn't like that, so I just never make it anymore... DH is a 34 year recovering alcoholic.. I've never seen him drink so don't know how he was then, but I've often made that same analogy about drinking and eating... You can quit drinking and smoking and drugs, but you have to eat to live.... Most everything is a temptation... A whole box of sugar free/fat free Cookies is still bad for you..... Anyway thanks for the encouragement.. Hope you have good days ahead, too.. Well, no sleeping with DH again tonight.. We spent all this time cleaning the bedroom and putting up our new sleep Number bed and it doesn't work!!!!! Dang air pump doesn't blow any air.. I've just been on the phone getting a new one on the way. They promised to have it by Wednesday... So, back to my recliner... At least my bedroom is spring-cleaned... and we are working on the living room now... Hey, Long, sorry you have a bug.... My SIL had it for a week... hope that doesn't happen to you.... take care of yourself Bye all, talk again later.. Julie