Search the Community

Excellent thread - thank you @JamieLogical! I got sleeved almost 3 years ago. I hit my goal weight well within my first year. I lost another 10lbs very slowly in my second year to reach a BMI of 20. I was absolutely thrilled - I had lost just over half my body weight and was well beyond wildest dreams territory after a lifetime of obesity. But I started to regain this year. Initially I thought it was just the classic '3rd year regain' of the 10 - 20 lbs that so many people seem to experience. I asked lots of questions here and was reassured by the answers. I hadn't really drifted *that* much off the path (I thought). However, I continued to regain with no let up and was getting really worried. I eventually reached 16lbs over my lowest weight a month or so ago. Finally, I decided to go back to absolute basics and see whether that might reverse the regain. Carbs had crept in a bit (NOT A LOT, honestly) so I started every meal with protein, ate veg next, and stopped all bread, rice, pasta, potatoes etc. Just as I would have 2-3 years ago. Guess what? I have lost 9lbs of that regain in just over a month. My current diet is pretty much strict keto and not hard at all. I totally agree that the tool is there, we just have to use it and not eat around it. I'm so happy that I caught myself before I regained much more, but I can also totally see how I might have undone much more hard work. I wish you all the very very best with your new loss. I suspect you'll greet every milestone with just as much joy as you did originally.

It never ceases to amaze me how some people seem to feel completely at ease commenting freely on other people's weight (or, honestly, entitled to comment) in a way they would not about other things - e.g. to comment on other aspects of a person's physical appearance or behaviour. I suspect they give little to no thought to the effect that might have on the person they're commenting on - positive or negative. It's just something they feel entitled to say. And, yes, when it's commenting on a significant weight loss, the expectation is that we will welcome those comments because we were fat and now we're not. People seem to feel sometimes that we are churlish not to welcome these unsolicited remarks with open arms. I do think people are mostly trying to be nice and supportive and complimentary. They don't think too much further than that. I'm with you as someone who struggled with those remarks sometimes. The only consolation I can give is that it all settles down. Nobody has called me a skinny minny for years, LOL. I'm sorry you're having a rubbish time and I really hope that's behind you soon OP.

@Chatterboxdea I have had a similar problem. I have only lost 3.4 pounds in the last 19 days. I was stalled with a pound or so for two weeks. My foods are where they should. I’m going to the gym 3-4 days a week as told. My water is a little iffy by not too bad. we just have to remember that we did not gain the weight overnight and we won’t lose it that way either. Some of us lose slower than others. It obviously doesn’t hurt to talk to your dietician and get suggestions. But you are not alone.

I know I’m over reacting and not giving myself enough grace but I have gained a pound this week and only lost 6 lbs in a month. I’m so frustrated! I really wanted the weight to fall off after surgery and I have come to terms that it will be a slow process (even though I’m eating so much less than I was). I have even been trying to walk more. I know there is nothing really to do but keep going and it will get better, it’s just so disheartening to not to see the scale going down, especially at 5.5 weeks out.

Nausea, vomiting, foamies, difficulty eating aren’t that uncommon after surgery. Your tummy is pretty sensitive and while it usually take about 6 or so weeks to heal some take longer. But it is always best to rule out anything else. Please tell me your doctor gave you something for the nausea & is sending you for tests. If not, I’d ask (demand) an endoscope to rule out a stricture and an ultrasound to check your gall and rule out anything else (appendix, pancreas). I only had one symptom with my gall (I had a stone) and that was pain. Very strong, writhing on the bed pain upper right abdomen & around to my back. Nothing before that. I know my sister in law used to get crampy pain and nausea when she ate fatty foods or a large heavy meal with her gall. You’re certainly not eating fatty or rich heavy meals at the moment. If it is a stricture, they’re easy to fix. If you do have gall stones it would mean another surgery. Gall issues after surgery aren’t uncommon. Rapid weight loss can cause stones to grow but usually not that soon out. (Mine was 2 years and one month later.) Or you may have had them already but they’re making themselves known now.

I think i have to lose more weight first to "cure" it. I had BP from pregnancy and it didn't go away because of my weight n poor lifestyle so let's see in a couple of months

My first thought was that the body composition measurement wasn't accurate. You're maintaining a steady weight, so it would seem odd that just your fat would drop but your overall weight would stay the same. If all your labs look good, I would see about getting remeasured. For the other symptoms you were having, though, it wouldn't hurt to take a look at what you're eating and make sure you are getting plenty of fruit and veg, and increasing your healthy fats if you can.

possibly or also some people have high blood pressure that is purely genetic I mean if it’s not diet or weight related maybe the surgery doesn’t make it go away?? I imagine that reducing weight and changing diet would have to help some, but maybe it doesn’t cure it entirely. Good you are back on it though for now if you need it.

Not that uncommon and comparatively not more strict. There are variations between surgeons and surgeries with many of these things. Sometimes it’s also related to you, your health, how much weight you have to lose, your relationship with food, etc, Not being allowed carbonated drinks is common. The differences arise in length of time of this avoidance and then whether you can tolerate it. Also you may be allowed sparkling water that you let go flat a bit but not sodas. Same with alcohol avoidance but there are three main reasons often behind this. One is concern for addiction transfer which can occur after weight loss surgery. Secondly, alcohol is calorie dense and offers no nutrients which are vital while we are losing and eating small portions and lastly it will slow your metabolism & dehydrate you. Again some surgeons just put a time frame on it but it does depend on your surgery too. Caffeine is another thing that is allowed by some surgeons and not by others and again there can be differences in for how long you should avoid it. Deconstructing meals is not a forever thing. Certainly while losing, focussing on eating the protein component of your meal first is very important. If you are able after you’ve eaten the protein in your meal. you then can eat your vegetables then any carbs you are allowed. (There were many times I could only eat my protein at a meal and nothing else.) This is because of the small portions we can eat initially & the necessity of getting that protein in to meet your protein goals. It does make tracking your food much easier too. When you near your goal, and are eating larger portions, it’s not as important to eat your protein first but you must continue to hit your protein goals forever so it will be something of which you are aware when you’re eating. In saying that I often ate soups, stews & casserole type dishes, omelettes, etc. which combined protein & vegetables while losing but not every meal and not every day. Actually not allowing protein shakes is also not uncommon. For example, in the UK, many aren’t allowed protein shakes in the pre surgery diet (they drink milk instead). Protein shakes aren’t the sole source of protein & nutrients in that first stage after surgery. Bone broths, consommés and cream soups are also options. Thank goodness too because after surgery those protein shakes can be disgusting. I found them unpleasantly grainy and crazy sweet & struggled to drink one a day. Best advice is to follow your plan while you are losing.However, if you find it difficult to tolerate your food options or to reach your goals ask for alternatives that will allow you to still meet protein goals & other nutrient requirements within any calorie guidelines you are given. How and what you eat once your weight has stabilised is up to you, what you’ve learnt about your eating and relationship with food and if it allows you to maintain a lower and healthier weight & lifestyle.

I think it takes our minds some time to catch up to the changes in our bodies, especially when the change has been so quick and you have been distracted by all the new eating rules and weight loss. You also had your holiday to focus on too. Now there are no real distractions and the changes have hit you. I know when I lost weight previously, it didn’t feel ‘real’ - ?? I felt like I was observing someone else from afar. I know it doesn’t make sense - I was the one dieting, I was the one working out, I was the one weighing and measuring but it’s honestly how I felt. I certainly didn’t feel that, once I had hit target, that I would stay thinner and that would be that. I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, as they say! Comments from others can add to the problem, especially when your mind is playing tricks on you and you’re struggling to come to terms with a different ‘you’. I hate the backhanded ‘compliment’ because it just strikes me as bitchy when there is no need. It generally means that the person giving it is jealous or miffed at what you have achieved. Well screw them, that’s their problem, not yours. You certainly don’t owe anyone an explanation of how and why. 💜

How are your iron levels? Are they low? If they’re low, then you may need a supplement but if they’re okay, you don’t need anything. My iron levels were great & still are so I never took any iron after my surgery. Many people, women especially of all ages, experience anemia and it seems there are many more cases now days than years ago. For some its lifestyle and dietary choices, for others there can be medical reasons behind it. If you are anaemic, ensure your doctor rules out any medical cause first. If there isn’t any medical reason, check your dietary intake. Ensure you’re eating a lot of iron rich red meats, green leafy vegetables, etc. Avoid caffeine when consuming food especially iron rich foods. Caffeine reduces your body’s ability to absorb iron by 60+%. Also your body doesn’t absorb iron from fortified foods (like breads, cereals, oat milks & other milk alternatives., etc.) as well either. Iron supplements can cause constipation. Don’t take your iron supplements with calcium or iron with zinc. Your body can’t absorb these in combination so take say the calcium and zinc in the morning and your iron at night. Remember too, excess iron isn’t good for you so avoid taking iron supplements if you don’t need them. Haemochromatosis can damage your liver, heart, pancreas & joints. Symptoms can include lethargy, weight loss, mood swings, depression, brain fog, irregular or no periods & joint pain. Interestingly, many of these symptoms are the same as with anaemia.

As @ynotiniowa, said the time it takes for your head to catch up with the reality of your actual size contributes a lot to the dysmorphia for us: we can only see how we used to look because our size dominated & limited so much in our lives. It also affects friends and family who struggle to see the real you with your weight loss. For some family and friends it’s behind those ‘you’ve lost too much’ & ‘it’s time you stop losing’ comments they make. Personally, I found those skinny mini comments most upsetting (that specific phrase was most upsetting too) especially when I knew I still had weight to lose and I was no where near my goal. I knew, in most cases, it was people acknowledging my weight loss and congratulating me. I knew I should use it as motivation but I saw it more as them really saying you were huge before. It took a while after my weight stabilised for me to be comfortable and actually take pleasure in the you’re slim or small comments. Honestly, I still enjoy them today. I tell myself it’s because I worked hard to lose the weight and continue to work hard to maintain it & I’ve earnt the recognition. The reality is I’ve become a lot more vain than I was before and enjoy the attention. Lol!

Our fruit and veg is cheap over here especially if we shop in season and at a good market. They have jumped up in price since Covid and Brexit so it does pay to shop around. Since retirement and weight loss I have made it my mission to find the best bargains. I get plenty of fresh air and exercise this way. Its a win win. BTW, I love your posts

I'm still pre-op so I'm just guessing, but I think this is the kind of thing that disappears with time? Maybe once you get used to being your new normal weight you feel differently? My normal weight has always been 260 or so and I think I will always see myself that way. But just remember all that you have accomplished so far and you're still going!

Three days until my surgery. I'm feeling anxious and I'm definitely not handling the stress very well! Shouting at DHL parcel couriers and my phone company over minor issues. I'm really ashamed of myself and I hope this grouchy time ends soon. I'm still worried that something will happen and my liver won't have shrunk enough or they will say I haven't lost enough weight or something. @Candace4283 well done on getting your surgery done! Wishing you a speedy recovery!

Hey bari family ❤️ I know body dysmorphia is something that is really common in this community, and I did expect it of course, but I am really feeling it at the moment. To preface my feelings I am about to describe, I am PMS-ing so I know a lot of this is probably exacerbated by that! Either way, I have had such a noticable influx of people complimenting me on my weight loss at work this week - it seemed that there was no one mentioning it at all, and now every day this week I have had people come up to me and say/ask things like: "what is your big secret?", "you look amazing", "you're a skinny minny" etc. It hasn't been anything that I have taken offence to at all, but it has come during a week where I have felt so down about my appearance. I'd say this is the first time post-surgery where I have been looking in the mirror and just seen the 'old' me - I genuinely cannot see any loss, even though the scales & my clothes are telling me different. It is so saddening, normal, but sad. Anyway, that is my little reflection done with! What sorts of things did others do to get past this?

@JamieLogical are you counting steps daily or going for distance? I need to go back to the basics of eating after surgery. I’m like you and can’t eat a lot of food for a meal and count that as a blessing. I’m recently dealing with a strained groin and doing pt for it. I’m getting frustrated because I’m starting to gain my weight back. There is always an obstacle for me to go through on this journey. Hoping and praying to get motivated soon!

Well I took the advice or the veterans who did or do yoga now and ordered some smaller legging because mine were rolling down. I thought I was maybe getting close to being near the next size but apparently I was already there. They looked so small that I thought there was no way but I tried this and they fit (comfortably). Also today I told a friend that I am planning to check out a craft show that is near her this weekend and asked if she wants to go for a while. Well it’s going to be hot and we are planning to meet up and do lunch first so since can’t get away with bike shorts and them and leggings are all I have right now I was on Amazon looking for shorts. Well I found some that looked good and apparently I thought that before too because it said I purchased them in 2023. So I looked In my drawer and sure enough I had two pairs of them brand new and would you believe they fit perfectly. Good thing too because I was ordering a size bigger and wouldn’t have had time to exchange them. So I guess I am reaching the stage where I can shop in my closet for a while. Ooh and my brain definitely hasn’t caught up with my weight loss because the shorts and the leggings both looked like they were going to be way too small.

this is actually a good point that i want to add on to. during weight loss phase, so long as your LABS are good and you FEEL good, i have the opinion that there is really no need to force yourself to eat if you just aren't feeling it. but ONLY of your labs are good! DISCLAIMER: i am NOT a medical professional and am only expressing what worked for me. feel free to take or discard anything i say! FOR BACKGROUND PURPOSES: i lost 110 lbs in 7 months to reach goal weight. i am now 6 years post op and have maintained BELOW goal weight this entire time. AND my labs have been "satisfactory" at every check up (the last one being Oct 2023...i have one coming up in a couple weeks and im going to assume it will also be uneventful cuz i feel great)

Are you gaining weight? Are you active? if so, how much? Not everyone has the same restriction.

My surgery was yesterday October 1st from the sleeve to DS SURGERY Highest weight -270( before gastric sleeve) Surgery weight-237 Goal -150

I have already had my Psychiatrist evaluation and the ok letter plus 3 others, I had to get. My first visit to my new psychiatrist was my one he used to okay me! We started at the beginning since he was new. We didn’t really cover a lot about the surgery but I did tell him about it in the beginning. I’ve been depressed, anxiety and grief since 2005. But no problem getting letter! Actually that’s when my weight gain started with behavioral meds.

I actually did tell my GP it was actually his idea. I am 440 pounds and was 435 ish when he recommended the gastric sleeve surgery. He did make my next evaluation in Janurary because he's expecting my weight loss surgeon to do the surgery sometime in November if I pass my evaluation. I'm all the way ready and just have the evaluation left to do hopefully all goes well this afternoon! Still a little nervous but I'm feeling MUCH better than i was several days ago. But anyway my GP did mention that if i got the surgery in November that I'd need to get labs done for Janurary. So I'm assuming he's going to adjust my meds then and my psychiatrist knows I'm getting surgery too although I told him I was getting it done in Spring because that was the plan then. I moved it back to November because my GP recommended i do so. I'm still gaining weight so he wants me to have the surgery as soon as possible.

Absolutely. I had the sleeve four years ago and now the revision and you definitely want to make sure that you’re in a good place with your mental health because it takes just as much mental energy as it does physical to deal with all the changes you will be going through. It’s like a whole new lifestyle post surgery if you’re doing it right. They are really great changes, but it is still alot in short time. Be honest and trust their judgment- they have done this a lot of times and they just want to make sure that you’re in the right headspace when they do it so that you can be most successful immediately post surgery to keep you safe but also long term so that you will be successful in your weight loss. One thing I did too was to ask my team if it would be okay for me to just check in with them a little more often than they typically require. They agreed to that and it has made the process a lot less stressful this time. I just get super anxious about everything and medical stuff is even worse so stuff like this creates a million questions and it’s hard when you call the front desk and they don’t know about your mental health for them to not be annoyed when you call a bunch of times. This time I just go in and have a chat with the NP about all my concerns and she reassures me everything is fine and I’m on my way. Also, you will want to let your prescribing Dr know about your surgery at some point if you haven’t already. They will want to check in with you a couple of times post op because sometimes with the absorption changes in the body your medication doses may need to be adjusted a bit. And keep posting on here. There are so many people who have been through anything you may have a question or fear about or if you just want to vent about a stall. People are so wonderful here and eager to help. Staying active on here and the in person support groups has really helped me. Im excited for you. It’s a pretty incredible journey and you will get there soon enough.

HI all, The surgery itself went well, the GERD is gone and my hiatal hernia has been repaired, however, I am dealing with terrible constipation (so much pain!), stomach cramps, and nausea (especially when trying to drink protein drinks or any zero sugar drinks). My surgeon has me on stool softeners, Miralax, and Smooth move tea, and Zofran for the nausea to help me to drink and consume more protein (they say I am in protein deficiency). They also want to get me an IV infusion to up my fluids intake with the hopes that will also help with the constipation. Mostly I'm just mentally and physically exhausted from it all. I know it will all be OK and a resolution will come eventually (whether it's a few weeks or months though is why I'm kind of worried about it all), but in the meantime I am at my job and uncomfortable sitting in my desk chair, feeling like I'm cheating my time because of how much I spend in the ladies room, and so close to a breaking point (there are other work issues) that I just want to quit so I can stay at home and convalesce in bed with my pets for a few more years. LOL I have lost a few pounds, which is a bonus (SW 286, last weigh-in was Sept 17 and I was 279, I think I'm probably below 275 at this point) since the surgery wasn't to lose weight but to fix the acid reflux issue. But I kind of feel like I just traded one problem (GERD) for another (constipation) and it's really dragging me down mentally. I hope everyone here is doing well and not dealing with any major issues post-surgery! Christine