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*trigger warning if you are scared about gastric bypass this is not a good post to read also it is a long * (admin if I shouldn't have posted this please delete) I debated long and hard about whether or not to talk about my dad and how he died. I never want to scare anyone and tbh his death wasn't so much because of the gastric bypass he had but rather the prejudice and malpractice of his primary care Dr and the hospital he went to for emergency care. My dad came into my life when I was 28yrs old. I didn't know I needed a dad honestly. He started dating my mom and considered me part of the package. He protected her, he protected me...no strings attached totally unconditional regardless if I wanted him to or not he was going to be there for me. Turns out even at 28 I needed a dad. He was 6ft 5", almost 500lbs, tattoos, beard, and a biker. Dad never talked a lot, he preferred actions. If he agreed with something he'd say "No doubt". If he didn't well he'd just shake his head and turn away. He had had 4 heart attacks by the time he had his gastric bypass surgery in 2009, He went down to 190ish lbs. Everything was great. He did everything he was supposed to do. Crushed his meds, no alcohol, watched his food ..he followed all the rules. Fast forward to July 2021. Dad and mom had split a few years back but he was still my dad. Around July 30th, he started having abdominal pain and couldn't go to the bathroom. He did something he hated to do.. he went to the Dr. The Dr filling in for his Dr took one look him..biker with tattoos wearing a leather jacket and on Medicare and immediately ignored him. He told dad if it was so bad go to the emergency room. So dad did. Hospital er looked at dad...biker with tattoos, wearing a leather jacket and on Medicare and assumed..drug seeker! Told him there was nothing wrong with him. They did no test and sent him home. About 2am on July 31, Dad was in horrible pain and call EMS, they weren't part of the hospital he had gone to earlier, in the ambulance they did an ultrasound on the way to their hospital. One of the paramedics picked up his cell phone and called the first number on it...my mom. They told her to meet them at the hospital, it was bad real bad. She and his biological daughter got to the hospital about the same time. Dr told them there was 3 options...1 take him into surgery immediately ..he would most likely died on the operating table 2. try to get him strong enough to have surgery he would most likely never wake up or 3 give him morphine and let him die. They chose option 3 and less than 30mins later he was gone. So what did a simple ultrasound find? Dad's large intestine had twisted so badly that while he ate, food couldn't get past the twist. Imagine making a balloon animal and twisting the balloon then keep blowing up one side.. the inevitable happened. The food side popped filling his body cavity with food and stomach acid. He didn't have to die. Had the Dr listened, they could have found it and done surgery to fix it. The hospital and the Dr, naturally, claimed no responsibility it was obviously the 12yr old gastric bypass that killed him. I wish I could say they were sued til they cried but dad's biological daughter refused. Me, I wanted their heads on a silver platter but I don't look good behind iron bars. My mom isn't very happy that I am having bariatric surgery less than a year after my dad died. She is trying to be supportive but she is scared. I often wonder what advise would he have given me. I got my insurance approval letter in the mail today and said to myself "so this is really going to happen". I swear I heard "No doubt" Sorry this was so long.

I've had some alcohol, a little beer and a little cider. I'm not much of a cocktail drinker (except for gin and tonic, I could kill a pitcher of those by myself!) and I've been hesitant to have wine, since it always gave me heartburn pre-surgery. My doctor is very much a 'think about it and watch how it makes you feel' kind of guy about foods and/or alcohol. I don't have any 'can't ever eat' restrictions, like some docs seem to give to their patients. It's working for me, I'm finding myself making good decisions without having someone give me tight right and left limits on what I can do.

I was sleeves on May 20th and I'm 25, you're not alone! ????I was sleeved in the 26th and I'm actually 21! The whole no-alcohol thing seems to be the hardest for me right now because all of my friends are having birthdays and the bar is where we all seem to hang out now!Awesome! I'm so glad to finally find some people on here around my age. Not that everyone here hasn't been super helpful, I just feel like it's such a different experience going through this when we're young. It's a fairly new procedure for weight - loss and we're going to be living with it for a long, long time! I agree the non-alcohol thing is difficult. I pretty much told my friends I'd be going into hibernation for a couple of months since most of our activities have revolved around alcohol. I'm going to make it work though and still find ways to go out and have fun until then. We should definitely all keep in touch since we were sleeved at the same time and will be going through all the stages together. lest one of us oldsters remind you of the caloric level of alcohol, I for one was certainly enabled towards my current condition by 5 years in undergrad and four years in grad school. And 4 years in the marines ( lots of consumption their).I don't envy you guys having to surf that right of passage wave knowing what you know and have to do. Will take lots of will.. You can do it..

My hubby and I were sleeved, he is not a drinker, i am a social drinker. He said that in his last class with the NUT someone said that they took 1 sip of wine and had to be helped home. The NUT also said that you have a higher risk of addiction when you are sleeved. i told him it that the research I did said that was because people trade one addiction (food) for another and i really don't think that will be me! I just REALLY would like a nice margarita dammit, LOL. Any suggestions would be welcome....anyone know anyone that turned into an alcoholic after the sleeve??

My hubby has a bypass. Half a glass of wine, and he is drunk. Is this true for sleeves as well?

I was looking at the nutrition info on Breyer's no sugar added ice cream (not sure what brand you were thinking of) and for no sugar added, they pack a lot of carbs in per serving! 13g. Most are sugar alcohols, specifically Maltitol, which can spike your blood sugar if you're diabetic because your body processes it similarly to sugar. Other sugar alcohols like Sorbitol can give you digestive distress, which I'm sure you don't want right now. So this might be one of those label reading learning experiences that sometimes they say sugar free, when it's a near fib and that it takes a lot of laboratory machinations to make fake food taste real. Maybe some ice chips for the cold you crave and something else you know is on your list would be better? Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

i was not into alcohol before surgery, i'm not fan of alcohol now as post-op.. i prefer some wine if i go out..

WOW!!! You are Beautiful! Your skin just glows!! I don't know if anyone has said this or not but CROSS ADDICTION is REAL!! When we can't have food to help us deal, sometimes we move to other things: alcohol, sex addiction, exercise. We all need to be careful here because it is a slippery slope. I am not saying this in a bad way. I just want you to be aware. My hubby said that he hoped I was addicted to sex. LOL NOPE but I do love to shop online and clothes, boots, and purses are my things that I overdo for sure!! Just be aware,

I would definitely not get the surgery now if you are feeling this way. To be honest, I had no idea how restricting the surgery would be. I thought I was going to have no cravings or hunger. Therefore, I was so excited and ready. I am 25 years old. I got the surgery on 08/17/2018. Let me just tell you, I am still dealing with food depression. I have no way to comfort myself now. I used to do it with food and alcohol after a long week of work. Now I cannot do that. Therefore, this tells myself I was not mentally prepared for the surgery. It’s too late now. I am stuck with the exhaustion and depression and boring life. I am stuck with this fear of food and fear or of gaining weight back. Still have an unhealthy relationship with food, but now it’s not eating. Ugh just terrible. I was a binge eater, though. Good luck. It is your choice. I am happy I got it because I am losing weight and feeling more confident. I hated being super fat. I felt disgusting after the fact I ate. So yes I am happy I did this, but it sucks at the same time. I think surgery is harder than actually dieting because you have no choice on how much to eat and you can’t have your cheat day because it all just hurts the little sleeve. I am just ranting now Bc I’m tired. Best of luck!!!

I do not but I am only 8.5 months post op. I do not drink alcohol and have not for years so that’s not an issue for me. If I eat out I order an ice water, sip it a bit before my meal comes, then I leave it there when my meal arrives. If anyone has noticed they haven’t said anything. I am sure plenty of people enjoy a glass of wine with their meal now and again.

I sometimes do when at restaurants or when invited to dinner (think alcoholic beverages). I try to not making it a habit.

Just checking in with a little positivity. I have been extremely lucky so far and am down 105 lbs since January. My only struggle was until just recently getting enough water intake. Kept waking up at night or in the morning with dry mouth. I have been walking 2-3 miles a day 5-6 times per week and lifting a few weights. There have been a couple periods where I don't lose for a week and then it comes off quickly. My doctor said 2 lbs a week should be a goal on average. I am back to eating normal foods(no bread, no rice and only the occasional wrap for a subway sandwich. My diet consists mostly of oatmeal for breakfast, protein shake at lunch, then a normal meal for dinner(meat & veggies). Have zero regrets on having the surgery. I didn't have any health problems prior to, just wanted to lose the weight. I did notice my blood pressure went down 30%, almost too low now(:)). But that was mostly because of my lifetime of tobacco use that no longer happens. I just got back from vacation, doctor told me I could have a little alcohol, and I did. I didn't experience getting tipsy like a lot of people mentioned you would. I did notice that my weight stays the same every time I have a few drinks, so I am going to have to keep my cocktails to a minimum to hit my goal. Keep up your faith and discipline. The weight loss will happen.

I have a HUGE amount of restriction. But you can definitely gain with that restriction. For instance I went on a 12 day vacation, and gained 4.5 lbs. Slider foods, alcohol, eating frequently, eating high calorie foods, all can and do lead to gain, no matter how little or how much restriction you have. It's cliche, but this surgery is a tool. You have to still make good food choices.

Ahhh, more sweet toothed folks out there! Good to meet ya! Everything suggested above looks yummy, but I would throw a word of caution out there (not to seem like a wet blanket) that I make a point of checking the calorie count of those Protein bars. 20 grams of protein sounds great, but some of those bars I've seen can pack over 300 calories! sugar-free doesn't necessarily mean "low calorie"- those things are sweetened with sugar alcohols, which can be just as high in carbs as some high octane sugary stuff. All depends on what you're trying to accomplish and watch, but for me, 300 calories isn't worth it. I can be happy with one sugar free Peppermint Pattie type candy from Weight Watchers for about 60 calories... I just eat it all slow and dramatic-like, like they do on the commercials & walk a little extra on the treadmill With that being said, sugar free pudding, Breyer's Carb Smart fudge bars & Hershey's Sugar Free baking chips are awesome!

I've had 3 diet cokes since I was banded and never had a carbonation problem. Decided not to drink alcohol though...didn't want to sepnd the calories that way.

My date is October 5th too. My surgeon and NUT are anti-Protein shakes so I am supposed to just keep doing the pre-op plan (3 high-protein meals/day, low carbs, no sugar/caffeine/alcohol) through 6pm the day before surgery.

That is a great goal! I'm pretty open that I'm not a super great rule follower. But I drank almost no alcohol during my weight loss phase. That was a huge deal because my work life includes A LOT of drinking. So it's great that you recognize that it will hold you back from your ultimate goal!

Hi. I was sleeved 01/28/2012 so coming up on seven years. I was 238 at my first appointment (5'6 female) and 219 the day of surgery. I was 39 and wanted to lose by my fortieth. I was down to 129 within a year. I am currently 114 but at year five I bounced back up to 160. I have been holding steady now under 120 for about six months. It was a huge adjustment the first year for sure. I was cooking for my family a lot and had two kids. We entertained almost weekly and had a very active social life. Everything was centered around food and alcohol which I now was trying to avoid. Eating out felt line a punishment watching everybody else eat. But I just kept ordering and eating the way I was supposed to because my life was getting so much better. I could do things I didn't want to do when I was heavier. Eventually I actually craved the proper foods. I couldn't believe the mental and physical changes. Now I am very content with all the changes I have made and no longer feel cheated when others eat. I swim everyday and love shopping for cute clothes. My relationships got so much better and I have been unbelievably happier. My compulsion to overeat disappeared and life became enjoyable instead of something to endure. Do I wish I had done it sooner? Sure, but I needed to hit my emotional bottom and figure out why I ate compulsively first. I don't think I had the determination to do it correctly before that time. It was the best decision I've personally made. I love my life, my stronger, fitter capable body and the freedom from my weight that was literally weighing me down and holding me hostage in my own body. Today I embrace and love my life. I eat to live and choose healthy options. This works and has been such a gift. It's not easy the first year, but it's so worth it in the end. I still have a lot of restriction and it reminds me not so gently when I overdo it. I rarely do because I know how to eat for my sleeve now. Good luck to the rest of the forty somethings. So far this has been the best decade of my life! Good luck.

I am having a bad day! Feeling very frustrated and like a failure. I will be 4 weeks post op tomorrow. For the past week, I keep gaining and losing the same 2 pounds. GRRR Then I took it a step further and drank alcohol last night! I only ordered one shot and sipped on it for about 2 hours. I got a little buzz from it and feel like total crap today! I keep feeling like I am never going to lose weight. I have failed at every diet I have ever tried (obviously, that is what led me to the sleeve) and I am staring to think I will fail at this too! Ugh! I hate feeling this way! Definitely one of those days I would like to stay under the covers and cry myself back to sleep! For some reason, I feel like I can't get my emotions together! Anyone else have these problems/feelings???

I am kind of dreading my appt with Dr. C today. I've been doing great until this last month. I didn't get a fill last month and he even threatened to do an unfill because I was getting stuck a lot. I was comfortable enough and asked him to leave me where I was. Since then however, I have gotten to where I can eat quite a bit and I get very hungry between meals. I've also been doing a LOT of socializing, especially drinking alcohol. Lots of empty calories. So, I have barely lost anything since my appt last month. I have recommitted myself and am going to ask for a fill today. I'm going back to less than 30 gms of carbs a day (I've also been sneaking in more of those) and hit the gym more often. I've basically been consuming like I probably would when I'm at maintenance instead of what I should be consuming while trying to lose, so I need to get back on the wagon and lose my remaining 24 lbs I need to get to goal. Another concern I've been having is hair loss. It has gotten really bad the past couple of months and I'm actually seeing thin spots where I can see my scalp. I'm going to talk to him about that today as well. Hope everyone else is continuing to do well!

18 months???? That's a new one for me. My surgeon recommended I avoid alcohol for six weeks post surgery. I regularly enjoy a wine with dinner and will very occasionally have cocktails that don't involve overly carbonated mixers. I can't drink beer at all, though I can drink champagne/ methode traditionelle. I am twenty months post OP. I do not find I have any issues with effect from alcohol. It effects me the same as it did pre OP.

I 100% live by the anything in moderation idea at this point in my journey because I know my triggers, what to avoid personally and when I can allow myself a "treat". I didn't want to live on a "diet" for the rest of my life but instead wanted to learn to eat normally. I will be the first to admit that I allowed myself to indulge a little over the holidays and now I'm back on track with my normal diet. That being said, I'm a year post op and 12 pounds from my goal weight. When I was a month out from surgery, I was still on pureed and I followed my plan to a T. I was also not allowed alcohol before 6 months. It is absolutely dangerous to stray from the plan this early out for multiple reasons, most importantly your stomach is still healing, which I think is what many previous posters were concerned about. If you are allowed alcohol and sweets per your plan at this point, great! Indulge, enjoy and get back on track but if you are not, I would stick to the your doctors plan. Sweets, alcohol, carbs and all that will still be here in the future and you can indulge when you want then.

Thanks Y'all! My doctor recommended not drinking until your weight had stabilized because alcohol supposedly effects sleevers more intensely. The woman who did my psych eval. did say that if I chose to drink prior to make sure I had someone I trusted with me the first few times to make sure I didn't get too loopy. For now, i will probably play it by ear...I definitely don't want to sabotage hard work...but also want to continue to live my life as normally as possible after surgery. (My social worker also said I "think too much"...so I should probably go with the flow on this one a bit

I am struggling here as well. And the funny part is I AM a therapist! We don't always have magic answers and it's something that I've tried to overcome many times and failed. I think what's scary for me now is food isn't an option anymore. It was always there if I needed it... But now it's not! Eek!! And Congrats on controlling your alcohol and other dependencies... That means you are strong enough to do this too

So we've all heard it- "You need to change your relationship with food." But what does that mean? How do you do it? How do you know it's done? I see this advice all the time but never steps to take to make that change. I'm seeing a therapist ( I have bipolar disorder and have had several different addictions through my lifetime so I will ALWAYS have a therapist) and I'm working through my problems with her. But I want to know how everybody else did it. How did you start? Did you have any slip-ups? When did you realize that you had gotten over your love of eating, or the unhealthy eating for convenience? I'm not saying everybody here is addicted to food. I don't even want to start that debate so please don't misunderstand Just to go ahead and start the discussion: Like I said earlier, I've had many dependency and addiction problems. In middle school it was my obsession with friends and attention. In my high school and college days it was pot and pills. In the most recent years I've struggled with alcohol dependency.* I've overcome it all! (YAY ME!!!! ) Now I'm staring down losing my most basic coping skill - food. It scares me. Of course all programs start out by telling you to QUIT. Quit smoking, quit drinking. We can't do that with food! So wtf do we do? What do I do? I'm working with my therapist but I'd like to have some advice from people who have actually faced this and overcome it. *I'm hoping that you guys will withhold judgment of my past deeds and try to help me with my current problem. I fully understand the risks associated with WLS and transferring addictions. Thank you