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I think it’s most definitely an issue, or could be rather. I met my husband at 220 lbs. at 5’ 2” and he was a 180 (tops) at 6’1”. We were both attracted to one another the way we were. We have always had silly “what if” conversations and we had a what if I ballooned to 400+ pounds....let’s just say, we would be divorced if change didn’t occur and one didn’t seek help. I would not stay in an unhealthy relationship. Whether it be a food addiction, drug, alcohol etc. And neither would my husband

A year ago I would have said no, weight does not matter. But a year ago I was miserable and trapped and still drinking the kool-aid. I was living with someone I still care about very much...but he had gained so much weight that his knees could no longer support him. He needed to lose weight in order to get bilateral knee replacements. He was completely bedbound and I was his full-time caretaker. I fully admit that I was an enabler. I gave him what he asked for in terms of food. I trusted him when he said he did his physical therapy exercises while I was out of the house. I was blinded by my love for him and it was unhealthy for us both. I gained 60 lbs. while with him. Family and friends begged me to leave him, but I loved him, and I would not give up on someone I loved. I tried giving him healthier food, but he would beg for junk and guilt trip the heck out of me. I would try to get him to do his exercises, but he would have any number of excuses why he couldn't. Finally, I had to admit that he was not doing anything to help himself. He was simply not interested in getting better. For my own menatal, emotional and physical health, I found a care facility for him and moved far enough away that I can't visit him very often (every time I visit he begs for junk food and alcohol). He is doing slightly better in this facility but has not lost much weight, even though his diet is supervised. Weight SHOULD NOT matter in a relationship, unless someone else's weight and unhappiness is directly affecting your own. Now all I want is someone to go swing dancing with.

My doctor really didn't give me any sort of limitations. I just don't drink anything carbonated, so I stick with wine and cocktails. But, be careful. It only will take a little bit to feel the alcohol!

I'm looking into lapband vs gastric bypass and have my informational seminar scheduled for the end of April. One big drawback is that my insurance will definitely not pay for surgery--it is explicitly prohibited by the HMO. :eek: I've read so many different opinions on this blog but it helps to read them all to get a balanced view. My biggest fear is that the cravings will be untouched by this process. :confused2: As most of you probably know, its not about will power, but the cravings I get for carbs and sweets are overwhelming. I've been to OA and many other support groups and they all mean well, but I think there is something missing. I know they have medications that deal with alcohol and cocaine cravings, so I wonder if they may find one some day that works with the food cravings, something to straighten the brain out and turn off that message. Anyway, I'll keep reading and moving forward. Thanks for being there. :bolt:

I know everyones doctor has different opinions -- but bread, Pasta, and rice become like playdoh had cause the blockage. I am wondering if the crust caused that for you?? Here is some great info I copy and pasted from another post - hopefully you will find helpful! How to Tell When You Are Perfectly Adjusted You are losing 1-2 pounds per week. If you are not losing 1-2 pounds per week: A. You may need an eating adjustment 1. Are you eating 60 grams of Protein a day? 2. Are you eating 25 grams of Fiber? 3. Are you avoiding all liquid calories? a. Soup can be sign of soft calorie syndrome b. Alcohol contains a lot of calories 7 calories per gram.(It's also a stomach irritant). c. fruit juice is just sugar Water 4. Are you making healthy food choices from a wide variety of foods? a. Are you avoiding soft foods b. You can't just eat what's easy c. cheese is glorified fat 5. Are you drinking 6-8 glasses of water a day between meals? 6. Are you eating too much junk? a. chips, chocolate, nuts, ice cream, Cookies and other highly processed junk foods are too calorically dense to be regular parts of a healthy diet. But don't avoid them completely to the point where you feel deprived. b. Stay out of fast food places 7. Are you getting in two servings of Calcium daily? 8. Do you always eat the protein first? 9. Then the vegetables or fruits a. Five servings a day b. Potatoes are NOT a vegetable 10. Is your portion size appropriate? a. meat or fish (3 ounces the size of a deck of cards) b. Vegetables (½ cup the size of your fist) c. Starch (If you eat the protein and the vegetables first you don't need much - Avoid: rice, potatoes, pasta) 11. You might try avoiding artificial sweeteners a. Some people think that artificial sweeteners stimulate the appetite b. They are HUNDREDS of times sweeter than sugar c. They teach you to like things too sweet d. There is no evidence that people who use them are any thinner than people who don’t 12. Avoid most diet foods a. Real food usually tastes better b. Real food is more satisfying than low calorie substitutes c. When you are only eating a tiny bit the caloric savings is not that great (Use a teaspoon of real butter instead of a tablespoon of diet margarine. d. The body has no way to break down artificial fats). a. They may go into permanent storage b. Some people think liposuction is the only way to remove hydrolyzed fats from the body B. You may need a behavior adjustment 1. Are you eating only when you are hungry? a. If you're not sure drink 8 ounces of water and wait 2. Are you eating three meals a day? a. With maybe 1 or 2 small Snacks (preferable NOT) 3. Are you sitting down to eat? 4. Are you eating consciously? a. No distractions, turn off the TV, put the book or newspaper away, pay attention to your food and your companions 5. Are you eating slowly? a. Put the fork down between bites b. Take 20 to 30 minutes to finish a meal c. Taking longer might cause the pouch to begin emptying 6. Are you taking small bites? a. Tiny spoon, chopsticks, cocktail fork 7. Are you chewing well? 8. Are you drinking with your meals or too soon after your meals? a. Practice water loading between meals b. You won't be thirsty if you are well hydrated before the meal 9. Are you stopping at the first sign of fullness? a. Sometimes it's a whisper: not hungry, had enough b. Hard stop versus soft stop 10. Do not eat between meals. Stop grazing. 11. Do not eat when you are not hungry C. You may need an activity adjustment 1. Are you getting in 30 minutes of physical activity at least 3 times a week? a. Over and above what you would do in the usual course of your day b. Could you make it 4 or 5 times a week? c. Could you make it 45 or 60 minutes? 2. Are you taking advantage of opportunities to increase your physical activity? a. Taking the stairs instead of the elevators or escalators b. Walking on the escalators instead of riding c. Parking your car further away from the entrance d. Getting out of the car instead of using the drive through e. Getting off the bus one stop before your destination f. Washing you car by hand instead of the car wash g. Playing with your kids D. You may need an attitude adjustment 1. Are you committed to your weight loss journey? 2. Are you totally honest with yourself about how much you are eating and exercising? a. Log your food and activity on ww.fitday.com for 3 days 3. Are you using food inappropriately to deal with emotional issues? a. Have you identified what the emotions are that drive your eating? b. Can you think of more appropriate ways to deal with those emotions? c. Are you willing to seek help from a qualified counselor? 4. Are you attending and participating in support group meetings? 5. Have you drummed up some support from your family and friends? 6. Have you dealt with saboteurs realistically? 7. Do you have realistic expectations about the weight loss journey? 8. Are you still obsessing about food, weight, dieting, eating? a. Obsessive compulsive thoughts (Obsess about something else) b. Perfectionism (All or none, black and white thinking) c. Patience with the pace of healthy weight loss 9. Are you acknowledging your successes with non-food rewards? 10. Have you learned how to take a compliment? 11. Are you giving up diet mentality? a. Stop weighing yourself several times a day or every day b. Stop dieting c. Stop depriving yourself d. Stop defining food as good and bad e. Stop rewarding and punishing yourself with food 12. How do you feel about all the changes taking place? E. You may need a band adjustment 1. You feel like you are making healthy food choices in appropriate portion sizes but getting hungry between meals? 2. You can still eat white bread, fibrous vegetables and large portions. 3. You are having to struggle to lose 4. You are gaining weight in spite of eating right, exercising and having a good mind set. F. You may need your band loosened 1. There are times when you can’t get fluids down 2. You are vomiting too much a. How much is too much? More than once by my defination. 3. Do you have frequent reflux or heartburn at night? a. Do not lie flat or bend over soon after eating b. Do not eat late at night or just before bedtime c. Rinse your pouch with a glass or water an hour before bedtime d. Certain foods or drinks are more likely to cause reflux: (1) Rich, spicy, fatty and fried foods (2) Chocolate (3) Caffeine (4) Alcohol (5) Some fruits and vegetables (6) Oranges, lemons, tomatoes, peppers (7) Peppermint (8) Baking soda toothpaste (9) Carbonated drinks e. Eat slowly and do not eat big meals f. If you smoke, quit smoking g. Reduce stress h. Exercise promotes digestion i. Raise the head of your bed j. Wear loose fitting clothing around your waist k. Stress increases reflux l. Take estrogen containing medications in the morning m. Avoid aspirin, Aleve and ibuprofen at bedtime (Tylenol is OK) n. Take an antacid (Pepcid complete) before retiring o. Try other over-the-counter heartburn medications p. See your health care provider HUGS to EVERYONE!<!-- google_ad_section_end --><!-- / message --><!-- sig -->

The only reason they say 6 months is the calorie intake. That being said, alcohol will be okay. Try to stay away from carbonation though. Also, keep in mind you are not eating as much. You may find that you get buzzed more quickly. Good luck.

This is me thinking about how I sometimes react to alcohol...I never know when it will make me feel queasy which could then possibly lead to getting sick or dry heaves which in turn could lead to somehow damaging the band...but sometimes I don't know when to say when either so I guess everyone is different.

Well, tomorrow I see the NUT for visit 1 of 4. I was hoping to find out what Dr. Turnquest decided about doing surgery on me (Non-Alcoholic Cirrhosis) but I have the feeling I won't. Earlier this week they hadn't gotten my records from the liver doctor (liver dr said 7-10 business days). It has been over 10 days but I doubt I will know anything one way or another tomorrow. Any suggestions how I can get things moving so I will know? You know how a doctor's office staff can be. I really don't like (can't stand) waiting another month! Besides that, I have so many tests, etc that have to be done pre-op, as you all know, and I don't want to do any of that till I know for sure I am having surgery. Waiting is pure hell!

I have had the sad experience to know someone who became an alcoholic after having gastric by pass and it is very sad indeed as the drinking of "spirits" has a much faster absorption rate in someone who has this surgery and the affects of the liquor are felt much more profoundly enhancing the addiction. Sadly this person experienced many many issues as a result including, sepsis, kidney failure, sirosis of the liver and an untimely death at the age of 46. She was not someone you could speak to easily and would not seek or participate in counseling.

I too know someone who died in her sleep at around age 40. She was a diabetic and became alcoholic, left her family, got uber skinny and was sick alot since she wasn't eating well - really went rogue post gastric bypass. Luckily that is the exception but it does happen.

Hi. Just sharing new articles at the ASMBS: http://connect.asmbs.org/stories-of-the-week-01-05-15.html. Example: WLS is not the "easy way out"; and the risk of more alcoholism after gastric bypass [or, seemingly all WLS]. Click links: Experts: Weight-Loss Surgery Not an Easy Way Out (DelawareOnline) In a local Delaware story featuring two patients who had bariatric surgery after years of struggling with obesity and comorbidities, Dr. John Morton, president of the ASMBS, discusses the advancements in surgical techniques and laparoscopic technology that have made weight-loss surgery "a very safe procedure," Morton said. In Delaware, close to one-third of adults are considered obese and nearly 80,000 people live with diabetes and another 57,340 have heart disease. The article notes, “Unlike most states, Delaware's Obamacare plans do cover bariatric surgery, but candidates must go through screening before it is approved.” All hospitals in the state offer weight-loss management services ranging from nutrition help to performing most of the surgeries on site. It is also noted that, according to ASMBS, there are about 18 million people who qualify for surgery, but only one percent go through with it. And health officials say, a “lack of information and insurance issues have been a deterrence, even as the surgery itself has evolved during the last 50 years.” Dr. Morton comments, "Obesity is a disease and like any disease it deserves treatment… it is something that is really critical. Patients at that weight don't have a lot of options.” Alcoholism After Gastric Bypass: Is It In Your Mind Or Gut? (ScienceLine) In 2012, a large study published in the JAMA reported that the percentage of patients abusing alcohol increased by 2% after surgery, and other studies have corroborated the findings, even a decade after surgery. Since then, scientists have competing ideas for why gastric bypass patients show higher rates of alcohol abuse post-surgery. One early theory proposed addiction transference, suggesting people adopt new addictions after weight-loss in lieu of food. But more recent evidence suggests specific metabolic and hormonal changes triggered by gastric bypass may leave patients vulnerable to alcoholism, but not other addictions. “Whether it’s addiction transference or something else going on, we really don’t know at this point,” said James Mitchell, a doctor and professor of neuroscience at the University of North Dakota. What’s certain, he said, is that the high rates of alcoholism in patients who have had a gastric bypass operation cannot be attributed to chance.

I celebrated national tequila day in true form. I never had an issues with alcohol. I just watch for carbonation and I know that it is going to affect me more.

I'll just give what guidelines I was given by my surgeon before I even had the procedure. -no carbonated beverages- as I recall, not only will it cause discomfort, you run the risk of stretching your pouch, and increase the possibility of your band slipping. Some people still choose to risk it, but I personally choose my health over the fizzy stuff. I've been without soda or anything carbonated for a year, I feel better, and don't feel that deprived. - no alcohol for a year. Alcoholic drinks can be LOADED with sugars, which makes it easy to gain weight if you drink them on a regular basis. On rare occasion, I've had one drink, but not until about 6 moths post-op, and even then, in the past 6 months, I've had maybe 5-6 drinks. Just remember to do things in moderation, since drinks can be so high in sugar, and because liquids go down easily, it's easy to overdo it.

I thought the topic was about alcohol too. I'm 4 mths out and drink a glass of red wine everynite. 100 calories well spent, in my opinion! I started drinking wine at about 2 mths. My dr had no rule pertaining to alcohol except "it's empty calories"

I know 2 people that had WLS personally, well 3 I guess (old co-worker). Their failures taught me the things to avoid. Eating regular food early = feeding tube Not learning nutrition or how to eat healthy = regain Not cooking =Regain Viewing it as a diet = regain Not logging food = regain So there is a lot of learn from the failures of others. The only thing I see all the time on weightloss forums, is people aren't honest why they failed. They blame the surgery for not working, they blame their metabolism (which they never ever had tested). They never ever blame their actions or lack of action. They can never provide a detail of what they are eating. I also feel like this rash of people having surgery are going to skew the statistics, make WLS seem less effective and make it harder for other people to get surgery through insurance in the future. Anyway, I am still holding out hope that a lot of people are just trolls from the popularity of the app and not real WLS patients. Right on! This is why I personally have gotten invested in these particular posts. Because there are so many people that this surgery has saved/helped. It is so frustrating to me that people fight so hard to get this surgery and get denied and then others choose to squander their shot or more importantly put themselves in danger and then blame WLS. The idea that you would remove 85% of your stomach or reroute your insides only to do something that could prove to be dangerous to the success of this surgery. These are the people that actually put the success of WLS and the reputations of their surgeons at risk. They ruin it for others.....I had a friend who had an open RNY that was riddled with complications to the point she actually had to have it reversed. At the time, I had not idea of what was required so when hers failed and she became very very ill, it scared me and kept me from even considering this surgery for more than 17 years. Now that I know all the darn rules, I look back at what she did and I know exactly why her surgery failed. She honestly did it to herself. She was my roommate so I know what crap she put in her body immediately following bypass. I know she did not even drink a single Protein shake, nor did she take Vitamins. She drank alcohol within the first 2 weeks and pretty much ate what the rest of the family ate which was a high carb diet of macaroni and cheese, Pasta dishes, bread, etc. I watched her get sick every single time she ate. When she had her surgery reversed she was 5'3" and weighed 89lbs. I know this because I took care of her 5 children while she was in the hospital for over a month on a feeding tube. The surgery did not do this to her, she did it. Every bit of it. That kept me scared to death to even try. This of course was the extreme and I am also guessing they did not know as much about Bariatric surgery 20 years ago. But at the end of the day, it was what I saw and believed and was terrified and did nothing all that time. For me, being 310 lbs caused severe damage to my spine and joints that cannot be undone. This is why I am passionate about people who potentially cause damage to the success of the surgery or the reputations of the surgeons, doctors and nurses who perform it. Incidentally, my friend Peggy gained all of that weight back and then some following her reversal. Also, I am guessing this is exactly why there is such a long drawn out process to even be approved for this surgery. They want to make sure you are ready and willing to do what it is going to take to make it happen. Sorry for the length of this post, if it helps one person understand why I and many others are frustrated by the lack of accountability or worse yet, other people thinking it's no big deal "people make mistakes", then it's worth it because so many new folks on here are still learning.

Congrats on 9 years! I lost my brother to drug addiction and my boyfriend is a recovering addict/alcoholic with 2 years under his belt. I just wanted to give you mad props!!

I had an uncle years ago who was an alcoholic. When he finally decided to stop drinking, he started gambling. He actually became a bookie and would sit in front of 4 TVs watching all the games with a bank of telephones (this was pre-cell phone days). He use to brag how he wasnt truly an alcoholic because he was able to give it up. Even at my early age I recall thinking he didnt give up anything, he simply switched vices. food has been my vice for years. All of my family is slim, but most have alcohol or drug addiction issues. Mine was always food. It has worried me some that I might just pick up a different vice, rather than truly give up over eating. Luckily so far I have been able to control my behavior and exercise (at least for now) seems to be my drug of choice. Has anyone else had any issues with picking up another bad vice post obesity surgery?

I haven't had a drop of alcohol since right before I was banded. I will partake once I reach goal though.

So you have a cross addiction correct? One to Food, and the other to Alcohol. I met a Man at a WL meeting. and he was banded, and was in Tip Top Shape. When we introduced ourselves, he said he lost over 400 LBS with the Band, and the Band saved his LIFE. My mouth hit the floor, I couldn't believe it. Then he said He swap 1 addiction for the other "this can be common." He worked out at the Gym while banded, but his calories were all liquid Calories. Next he tried pain killers for his knees, and the booze and the pills formed a real good relationship. Until he almost died of a over dose. So he belonged to Lap Band Meetings, AA Meetings, and NA Meetings. I will never forget him, because it was the first time I ever heard about swapping out Food, for another addiction, and his addictions were consumed all through the mouth.

We are here for you. Like begets like. You are doing fantastic. You are not gaining weight are you.? I know just how you feel , even after almost 4 years. I eat very very little. I am so used to it. That's why quality is more important than quantity.. Crapy food in your mouth is just wasted time and calories, you wouldn't put bad gas in your car would you.? Or in your dog or cat. And if you have been reading the post, you know how I feel about alcohol. Keep up ALL the positive things in your life. Hugs

I wonder if the alcoholism is the same in sleeve patients?

Ok... I've been lurking here for awhile, and have read all of the articles on alcohol everyone has posted. However, the sleeve patients in my town have their own group on facebook, and the alcohol question finally came up today. One person said they were told that it is more common to have liver damage post sleeve from drinking alcohol than it would be before being sleeved. Is this true? It makes no sense to me. I mean your liver is unchanged, so why would it be MORE damaged after a STOMACH surgery? If anyone has heard this before or know why this may be true please let me know. There's probly something I'm underthinking. lol.

My understanding is the purpose of the pre-op diet is to shrink the liver so the surgeon can get install the band efficiently. Alcohol is not going to help shrink the liver. Maybe a party without drinking is good practice for a new lifestyle -- not that you can't drink once banded but that there are going to be times when you need to make a healthier choice. This may be one of those times! Good luck to you with your upcoming surgery. Very exciting new chapter beginning!

I am scheduled to get my band on December 18th. I start my liquid diet on December 11th. Every year, I host an Ugly Ornament Party for some long time friends and usually most people imbibe many spirits for the party. I will be on my third day of the liquid diet. I know I probably should not have a lot of alcoholic drinks, as they tend to be high in sugar and calories, but I would really like to have at least a couple of drinks. Does anyone have any good suggestions for a low calorie alcoholic drink that would be possibly "acceptable" on a liquid diet? Also, do you think the alcohol would affect me differently while on a liquid diet? For anyone with a band, what alcoholic drinks have you drank with the band?

The intention of the liquid diet is to shrink the liver. I would not advise consuming alcohol as the liver will enlarge making it difficult for the surgeon to see where he needs to place the band.