Search the Community

Oh I can help here!! The first restaurant that I went to was a mexican restaurant and the folks on here gave me some great ideas. Order off the a la carte menu. Usually mexican restaurants have these. I got one cheese enchilada and a side of refried Beans. Went down perfectly and was enough food. I also had a couple chips and salsa, but it wasn't as satisfying as it used to be. Given your history, I'd avoid the celebratory margarita. Alcohol and sugar...bad mix on the sleeve (at least for me.) If your stomach can tolerate meat yet, you could try a chicken enchilada. And you probably want to stay away from the fried stuff. Regarding other restaurants. I used to be embarressed about not eating, and I too have a hard time asking to order off the kids menu or a half portion (I even have a card from my surgeon to present to the waiter/ress that says I had weight loss surgery and would can't eat the normal portion, but I haven't had the guts to use it.) I typically order something lite, eat what I can, and then just ask for a container to go (even if you aren't going to eat it later. Saves having to answer questions.) The hardest places I find to eat at are the bars that my husband and I used to swing by on the way home for an easy dinner. They have NOTHING that I can eat yet nor am I going to drink....so we really have just cut those places out. I guess that's just one change that we have made. My husband has been really supportive and hasn't asked me to go to any restaurants where I can't get anything to eat. But if he really wanted to go there, I would and then just make the best out of it. I always keep a small, lunch size cooler bag with me too with sleeve friendly Snacks, so if I do know I'm going to be in that kind of situation, I can eat ahead of time and then just order a cup of Soup or something to be social. Sorry for the long post, but I've been trying to figure this one out too. I hope this helps.

@@rnsamantha We are 2 peas in a pod! Although I'm much further out than you, I discovered recently I could drink diet soda without it hurting anymore. Well, the floodgates were open! I was in Reno last week, and I was drinking diet soda after diet soda while I was gambling. I figured it was better than drinking alcohol.... Well, needless to say, when I got home, I bought a 6 pack of Coke Zero. Although I don't believe the old wives tale about carbonation stretching your sleeve, I just can't see any good coming from drinking too much of that crap. Like you said, slippery slope. I pride myself on eating clean most of the time. There is NOTHING clean and unprocessed about diet soda! I ended up giving my Coke Zero to my grown kids for their house. No mas for me!

As you have learned from dealing with your issues with alcoholism (Congratulations, by the way, for 10 years sober) you need to avoid triggers and you need counseling to deal with issues that cause you to not live life to your fullest or happiest (such as eating disorders, addictions, etc.) I wouldn't focus too much on putting a label on your food issues, whether it's Binge Eating Disorder or Food Addiction or just plain Morbid Obesity . . . it's clear you have an issue with food that you need to deal with. WLS is a tool that will help you lose the weight, yes. But the bigger battle is the mental battle. Get into some good counseling to talk about your food triggers and issues and good luck on your WLS journey.

@@Dub Let us know how that hobby horse goes down! LOL! Your posts literally keep me in tears! Laughing of course. I am not a male nor am I a sleeve but thought I would add my two cents. I don't know if this is all bypass folks or just me. I love to cook and love to grill. My relationship with food has definately changed but mostly for the good. I have noticed that I don't tolerate smoke flavor much anymore. In fact it can actually make me sick pretty quickly. I think it could be an aversion but I definately know that it has happened post surgery. I figure like most things, this will resolve over time but for now bacon is about the only smoky flavor I can tolerate and I certainly cannot do double smoke. I am 13 months post op and have yet to try any alcohol. The most I have done is take a tiny sip of my sons bourbon. Then again, I did not drink frequently pre surgery, maybe once every 6 weeks or so.

I found that I needed more and more calories to be satiated as the months passed. By 6 mo post-op, I just couldn't maintain a very low calorie diet without becoming ravenously hungry. And, my weight loss progressively slowed down each month until the weight loss petered out at 9 months post-op. I reached my goal weight, losing 100% of my excess weight. I currently eat 1800-2000 calories a day and have maintained my final weight for five months so far. While my hunger has returned, it is nothing like it was pre-op. I feel very much in control of my hunger, and I find it difficult to overeat... even when I want to. And my body generally craves healthier, cleaner foods vs. the garbage fast/junk food that was the staple of my diet pre-op. I suspect the reason people regain is they increasingly indulge in slider foods... crackers, chips, cookies, etc... and start drinking their calories... sugary drinks, alcohol, ice cream and such. I think it would be very hard for me to eat enough "real" food to regain. My restriction is still very present, but it's easy to defeat it by "eating around" my sleeve.

What happened that they thought your liver was was larger than normal? You have not seen the surgeon yet! Who examined your stomach to determine this? Do you drink alcohol a lot? Just curious. This is one the few things I did not have to go through yet.

I am not "scolding" anyone I am just simply saying sometimes people forget where they came from and they have to remember how it would have made them feel if someone would have done that to them or how it would make you feel if you had an overweight teenager/young adult and someone approached them in the mall about WLS and your child came home in tears over it. My husband is severly overweight and will be having his surgery in a month or two and I have a teenage daughter who is overweight as well. My point was that if a random stranger approached my teenage daughter and started to talk to her about WLS the Momma bear in me would come out and tell you to beat feet. WLS is a topic that I would bring up with my daughter not something a random stranger should bring up. No one needs to take it upon themselves to approach a stranger about WLS. It is as bad as a person who no longer drinks and feels it is there obligation to tell you why alcohol is so bad or someone who has found religion again and feels the need to tell you why there god is better, It is a topic that should not be brought up to random strangers if people want to discuss it with family and friends that is one thing but to approach a total stranger is not acceptable in my opinion. Some people may feel diffent about it that is why we all have a different opinion I was just simply expressing mine as other were expressing theres. So if you felt you were being "scolded" that was not my intention as you were not the only one who had posted on this topic. I have recieved in the mail before from a "person with good intentions" ads for weight loss pills, exercise videos etc. mailed directly to me from a random person just trying to help me out was what the note enclosed in the envelope said. Do I know who sent them no but it was someone close enough to me to know my full name and address so I am very touchy about being approached by people with "good intentions" about weight loss help. All those ads and letter did was upset me. When I was ready to make a change I did the research and found out what steps I had to take to qualify for weight loss surgery.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009 Look for the Smilemarkers A sliver of moon was showing in the sky the other day while I was playing outside with my grandson, David (4yrs). As usual he wanted to know why. I told him the moon wanted to play with him. Later he was drinking chocolate milk on the front porch and said, "The moon is drinking chocolate milk. He has a chocolate milk mustache." I love it when a four year old can use his imagination and make a joke. I love it when a four year old accidentally amuses me. David was riding in the van with his dad when he announced, "I want my crocs (sandals)." His dad stopped the car and asked him what he was wearing on his feet. David replied in all seriousness, "Dad, I'm wearing my toes." Children and laughter go hand in hand. I love being a grandmother and not having to do much of anything when I babysit but enjoy the kids. My two year old granddaughter loves to play hide and seek in her house. She always hides in her closet and she always tells me she's going to hide in her closet. When I try to go home she frequently tells me I'm hungry and I need to eat in order to keep me there. LOL. She already knows my weakness. There's a lot of evidence that laughter is good medicine. The Reader's Digest knew that before there were studies proving it. I use a lot of silly humor when I teach. To teach the ang sound I have a picture-card of a vampire with fangs showing. I'll put on my best Transylvanian accent, make my hands into claws, and say," I vant to bite your neck; I vish to suck your blood." The kids all shriek and laugh and are more likely to remember that ang makes the sound you hear in fang. I have a game that involves tossing a soft ball back and forth between me and a group of kids while saying math facts. I love to watch for the kid who stops paying attention and I'll look at another child while throwing the ball at the daydreamer who frequently gets hit by the ball which cracks everyone up and serves notice to pay attention. Today I was on Lapbandtalk, which has become my on-line support group and one of the women told a hysterically funny dream she'd had about another member of the group. Can't repeat it here because it involved partial nudity and showing off a well-shaped body part. Jokes were still flying hours later when I checked back in. Some of the best and funniest speakers I ever heard were recovering alcoholics telling their stories at open AA meetings. Some of the things they did and the situations they got themselves into were, in retrospect, hysterically funny. Without the humor, they'd have been too painful to tell. The funniest stories I tell on myself involve my ADHD and some of the things I've done as a result. Humor makes pain palatable. I'm not talking about sarcasm or angry ranting expletive deleted humor. Frankly, I don't consider that humor because it tends to be at other's expense. I'm talking about self-deprecating humor. Humor that gently pokes fun at the human condition but doesn't denigrate others. One of the funniest stories my deceased mother-in-law told involved driving off to work with her teeth on top of the car. One of the funniest stories my son tells is what happened when he tied our 6 month old 75 lb. Chesapeake Bay Retriever to a lightweight charcoal grill in my parent's driveway. Thank God for the passing motorist who chased down the dog and stopped him before the grill chasing the dog down the street caused the dog to drop dead of a heart attack. These stories and jokes we tell each other can only happen in community. We weren't created to live in isolation. And I firmly believe that God laughs with us. We're created in his image and he loves us with all our foibles so he must have quite a sense of humor. Humor is his gift to us, a gracelet that allows us to be refreshed, renewed, re-created and ready for the next thing life throws at us. So, even though food addiction is a serious disease, I try not to take myself too seriously. Life is a journey. Look for the smilemarkers along the way.

Saturday, July 11, 2009 Evidence of God's Sense of Humor--ADHD The connection between ADHD and compulsive eating is something I've been noticing in myself for some time. I've never actually read a study directly connecting them, but ADHD in women is known to cause depression and low self-esteem since it often affects our ability to keep up with things that are automatically expected of women--like neat, clean houses, organized schedules (for the whole family), doing all the shopping, following recipes, etc. We spend a lot of time trying to be good at things we're not good at, and trying to fit the mold (which nobody really does-but we don't even come close.) Eating has always helped me concentrate and focus and sit still. Maybe there is a study out there that shows a relationship. I found one article that mentioned it but I mislaid it. LOL. One of the strongest markers of ADHD in women is disorganization and an inability to stay on task. (Although some people actually overcompensate and become rigidly organized because otherwise the world is too overwhelming.) ADHD people tend to be more right-brained and creative. I read Steven Covey's 7 Habits of Effective People 2 or 3 times, attended training in 7 Habits of Effective Organizations, andhad a Covey/Franklin Dayplanner, which I was continually searching for and forgetting to write stuff in. I can tell you what people need to do to act organized and I can fool people into thinking that I am organized (temporarily) but it didn't change the way I was made. I make lists and lose them. I go to the store with a list, check things off, and still come home without something on the list. I don't do recipes with more than 3 ingredients. I cook by the seat of my pants. I've come up with many compensating techniques that have helped me survive. Food, especially chocolate, is one of them. Chocolate, of course, is full of caffeine. People with ADHD frequently self-medicate with caffeine. They are also more prone to self-medicate with alcohol, tobacco, and certain drugs. So why shouldn't food be one of the "drugs?" Chocolate is also known to produce seratonin in the brain and therefore is a natural antidepressant. Like we need one more excuse to eat it. But food and chocolate helped me survive. I think I should be grateful for them even though I now have to move past them. The high protein low carb nature of the food recommedations for bandsters works very well with my ADHD. I'm supposed to pick protein first and then veggies and fruit and if there's still room I can have a little bit of of carbs like potatoes, noodles, rice, etc. I keep Atkins high protein shakes on hand if I don't feel like cooking or if I feel like my stomach really doesn't want solid protein right now which, first thing in the morning, it tends to reject. My stomach definitely does the weighing and measuring for me on the protein, especially if I don't drink for 30 minutes before, or during, or for 30 minutes after the meal. I am quickly full and have little room for anything else. I put a variety of proteins in my home so I don't get bored with my food choices. I'm not a huge veggie and fruit eater but I have V8 and diet V8 Splash as part of my 64 oz of liquid and I get my dairy in my two 20 oz. iced decaf lattes with 1% milk and Splenda. I sip one all morning and one all afternoon, and the milk seems to keep me from getting hungry. I have a very skinny straw that only allows me to sip, so I'm not gulping my liquids or finishing them fast. I have sugar free low-fat pudding snacks for at night if I'm hungry, and low-fat Mexican cheeze to make the proteins taste better. These help toward my dairy, too. I don't make potatoes, rice, or noodles and so am not tempted. If I'm eating somewhere other than at home I may allow myself a little--after I've eaten protein. I may try a taste of this or that treat at a party, just to not feel deprived but then I go into another room away from the food and stay there. This is actually a pretty simple diet. It doesn't involve any planning or writing down my food. It doesn't involve weighing or measuring portions. It works with my ADHD instead of against it and I'm not walking around feeling guilty for not being able to do all those other techniques just like I was not able to use a planner. I'm walking at least 45 minutes a day which helps control my ADHD as well as my appetite. At night I write my blog which is really helping me to not eat at a time when I used to eat treats non-stop. It's also helping me to explore the reasons I eat. Putting it down on paper is really helping me deal with and eliminate the cravings. Writing has always been a way to get what's stuck inside me, ideas, feelings, etc. out where I can deal with them. I've said before that ideas flow out my fingers like confetti when I'm composing. Its like my creative, feeling, flight of ideas right brain cooperates instead of fights with my language centered, logical left brain to create amazingly (to me) well-written organized articles. I'm learning to love this crazy complex lady who alternates between being a ditz and being competent, sticking my foot in my mouth and moving people to tears, letting myself be controlled by other people and overcontrolling others, hubris and self-contempt. It is so amazing that God loves me, that he gave me the the gift of ADHD with all its attendant problems and joys. He also gives me the tools to survive and even thrive. ADHD people are frequently huge brainstormers and creative problem solvers. We are the best solvers of the problems our ADHD creates. Such irony. God has a sense of humor.

Do you think you are retaining water right now? Is it your TOM or have you eaten something salty or drank an alcohol drink in the past day or so. Any of these things could make you retain water and that can make the band feel tighter. In any case, I've heard its best to go on clear liquids only when you are experiencing trouble like this to see if you can get the swelling to go down. Every time you try to eat something solid right now or even the protein drink, you are making the swelling worse. If after being on clear liquids only for a couple days, if it doesn't get better, then you gotta go see your doctor. Or, if you are miserable right now, certainly go to your doctor right now. Good luck to you and I hope you feel better soon.

Current Mood: Festive I think I have gained 4 lbs since the beginning of December. I say "I think" because it was 3 lbs last time I got on the scale and my behavior has actually gotten worse rather than better so I haven't gotten back on. I entered the holiday season with too much bravado and confidence for a fat person trying to lose weight. I thought, "I can't eat too much - I have some restriction - so I'll be ok." Not only did I make some seriously bad choices about what food to eat, but I also drank, and drank, and drank without regard to the calories. And, my habits suffered as well. I took the bus instead of walking because walking with a hangover was painful. I drank fluids with my meals because I was dehydrated from the wine the night before. I felt starved....And so on. I do not have a drinking problem. I do have problems with self control related directly to food -- thus the lap band decision. But, just as when I quit smoking, I find myself replacing one bad habit with another - this time it's red wine. I apparently forgot that the health benefits of one glass of red wine per day DO NOT extend to 4 glasses twice a week. The calories from 4 glasses, which now make me quite tipsy because of the lower volume of food, add up and fast. And, then when I have a few drinks, I feel a bit peckish and need a snack when I'm not supposed to be eating. It's a vicious cycle so, my new year's resolution is to avoid drinking alcohol. I'm not saying I won't enjoy a day-ending glass of red as a wind down, I just have to get out the recent holiday habit of downing booze at parties and dinners because I'm not eating. So, tomorrow evening, Christmas Eve, I have already invited over friends and family for mulled wine and cheese! Oh well, hindsight is 20/20 and this was my husband's idea more than 2 weeks ago when I still thought I had some control. We'll see how I do. In the meantime, my jeans are looser, I walked miles in the snow over the weekend and I actually got down in the snow with my kid to play and was able to get back up without a forklift. The scale may not be moving but I do feel better overall. January is my buckle down month...and then February...and then March, etc, etc, etc! Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and successfully avoids the more caloric niceties of the season. Best of luck and Happy New Year to all! B

Current Mood: Festive :cursing: I think I have gained 4 lbs since the beginning of December. I say "I think" because it was 3 lbs last time I got on the scale and my behavior has actually gotten worse rather than better so I haven't gotten back on. I entered the holiday season with too much bravado and confidence for a fat person trying to lose weight. I thought, "I can't eat too much - I have some restriction - so I'll be ok." Not only did I make some seriously bad choices about what food to eat, but I also drank, and drank, and drank without regard to the calories. And, my habits suffered as well. I took the bus instead of walking because walking with a hangover was painful. I drank fluids with my meals because I was dehydrated from the wine the night before. I felt starved....And so on. I do not have a drinking problem. I do have problems with self control related directly to food -- thus the lap band decision. But, just as when I quit smoking, I find myself replacing one bad habit with another - this time it's red wine. I apparently forgot that the health benefits of one glass of red wine per day DO NOT extend to 4 glasses twice a week. The calories from 4 glasses, which now make me quite tipsy because of the lower volume of food, add up and fast. And, then when I have a few drinks, I feel a bit peckish and need a snack when I'm not supposed to be eating. It's a vicious cycle so, my new year's resolution is to avoid drinking alcohol. I'm not saying I won't enjoy a day-ending glass of red as a wind down, I just have to get out the recent holiday habit of downing booze at parties and dinners because I'm not eating. So, tomorrow evening, Christmas Eve, I have already invited over friends and family for mulled wine and cheese! Oh well, hindsight is 20/20 and this was my husband's idea more than 2 weeks ago when I still thought I had some control. We'll see how I do. In the meantime, my jeans are looser, I walked miles in the snow over the weekend and I actually got down in the snow with my kid to play and was able to get back up without a forklift. The scale may not be moving but I do feel better overall. January is my buckle down month...and then February...and then March, etc, etc, etc! Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and successfully avoids the more caloric niceties of the season. Best of luck and Happy New Year to all! B

Superbowl Sunday breakfast- protein drink lunch- low carb tortilla with ham and skim mozerella rolled up Will be taking a crockpot of teriaki meatballs to the party later. I figure 3-4 meatballs and something off the veggie tray should do me for supper. The alcohol is a different story. Taking a bottle of Merlot with me, empty calories but oh-so-good. Yeah right~~~I ate so much crap today. chips and dip, brisket, beans, tortilla chips and guacamole, etc... Gotta getta grip tomorrow.

Well, I'm scheduled for my surgery on 8/13; pray for me! I am hoping that the problem with my severe reflux will be resolved and that the cause is a band slippage as he will be able to just reposition the band and leave it in place; the worst scenario would be total removal of the band,however, that would also mean,hopefully, a complete relief of my reflux symptoms and a wrap of the stomach around the esophagus for a "makeshift" lower esophageal sphincter which the one I have now may not be working properly. I really dont want to lose my band as I am so afraid of regaining the wgt more than anything; I am just now mentally being able to see myself as a smaller person; I look at my thighs that still have some "fluff" and see that as being overweight; I do need to lose about 10 more pounds to be at goal; I know I absolutely must exercise to maintain my wgt loss no matter what surgery will bring; thank you for everyone's encouragement and sharing your thoughts; I cant talk to anyone else as candidly about my feelings-skinny people dont understand;they tell me "just go on weight watchers",etc but as we all know if we could just go on this or that diet we wouldn't have needed a lap band to start with!That's like telling an alcoholic, just have a little glass of wine and you'll be fine or a drug addict, just smoke a little MJ and you'll be fine!!! If I start regaining the wgt I definately will consider another surgery even if it means without the blessing of my family; Thank you all for listening!

I’m a little over 3 years post op losing 96 pounds and have gained 20 back with alcohol being the main reason. Also, it’s become a habit as I have been drinking daily. I tend to eat more and the wrong foods when drinking. Today is the second day I haven’t had a drink and I’m going to try to only drink on Friday and Saturday and switch from wine to sugar free vodka. I was a big drinker before surgery and an even bigger one after. I hope you find what works for you to lose the weight, best of luck!

Somebody else on here today was talking about alcohol being an issue. Now that you know your primary trigger, you know what to work on. Have faith that your tool of bypass will still work for you if you get back to basics in terms of tracking your intake, watching drinking your calories, etc.

It's been 20 years since my bypass. My surgery weight was 379. My lowest was 170. The most I weighed post opp was 243. I'm now 218 and I'm struggling to get under 200. Anyone else here has this problem. I know alcohol is one of the biggest set back

Wise words. Really look into this if you're having trouble with alcohol - if you're restricting yourself too much for a period of time, your subconscious will find ways to break 'free'. And alcohol can be just one such way. Ie. if you've told yourself you'll never have x, y or z food, then be curious if alcohol becomes a 'get out of jail free' card to have that food. Because what may end up happening is all those desires channel into the alcohol, and then you've got two, not one, problem. For most, the cure for being out of control is not more control, but finding a balance. To not see any foods as good or bad, but as food, period. To count calories, but allow oneself to go over some days and under others. Again, if you're perfectly happy within the restrictions we set for ourselves here, fine. I am most of the time. Yet I know it's so much better to have a few popsicles than it is to get myself drunk to make the popsicles happen anyway.

Ok so lets start with stats Heighest 270 Surgery: 238.1 Current 223.2 * I actually gained 4 lbs in 3 days* Height 5'7" So let me start off my saying... BLAH!!!!!!!! OK so here goes.. I thought I was doing really well.. I was going to the gym 5 days a week, staying motivated, drinking all my fluids, and trying my best to stay on the program.. Don't get me wrong im not perfect and I did cheat.. normally I don't regret it because I really work my butt off at the gym, but recently I think because I've been justifying my cheat with a "well ill just work extra hard at the gym" im actually seriously sabatoging my progress. Let me say though funny part is im not cheating my eating foods im not supposed to eat.. but because i work in a bar im having a drink instead.. SO NOT A GOOD THING as im only 3 weeks out of surgery. Why am I telling you this... BECAUSE I AM GOING TO HOLD MYSELF ACCOUNTABLE! Now here is the kicker... TODAY I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL FOR SEVERE ABDOMINAL PAIN ON THE LEFT SIDE... I was in the ER for 11 hours, and they still have absolutely no idea why i have this pain .. i don't honestly think its because of the alcohol, but it scared me enough to realize that even a small cheat can be DETRIMENTAL to my health. As of now i am still in a considerable amount of pain, docs did an iodine test to see if i have any leaks and a CT Scan, all which came back normal.. SO why the pain? If anyone has the answer to that... PLEASE LET ME KNOW. From now on though.. im stickin to the plan cuz one thing i do know.. even though the alcohol may not be causing my ab pain... It sure as hell is contributing to my WEIGHT GAIN! And it is wayyyyyyyyyyyyy to early to be gaining weight! I mean ive heard of the the 3 weeks stall... but the 3 week weight gain.. GET REAL! So here is my pledge.... I will abide by the rules, i will still hit the gym, and i will hold myself accountable!

So I was thinking the other night. I recently took a trip to visit some old college friends that I had not seen in about 12 years. I was very excited about this. One of them was a female friend, and yes we were only friends. I had the biggest crush on her in college which she knew about, but nothing ever came from it. Well the night we all went out alcohol start to take its toll and we start talking. She tells me she is sorry for not liking me the way I liked her. I told her that she had nothing to be sorry about. it happens. We are both married now and in great relationships so there is no reason to be sorry. She still continued to apologize. She thinks that i still like her. I told her of course I still liked her but just as a really good friend. This leads to her telling me I was too NICE, and that I KNOW WHERE NICE GUYS FINISH!!!!! Now under normal conditions I would just let that slide. The next day while I traveled home I started to think more about the conversation. I think I was just used a lot during college, even high school. THe reason I say this is I AM ALWAYS THE NICE GUY. I think deep down this is what lead to one of my reasons for having the surgery. I was sick of always being the FAT friend, NICE GUY, Ect........ Granted I am married to a wonderful woman now but those were many of the thoughts that went through and continue to go through my head. Deep down I want to show them all. THe friend I had in college is still a great friend and we have talked about that night and think everything is good now. I told her how it made me feel and she apologized for it. Just some stuff I needed to get off my chest.

Here comes my opinion if it counts at all. IMHO - If you don't like a certain thing, stay away. I'll put it this way. In every grocery store I can think of, the alcohol section is right by the produce. I don't know why it's this way, maybe carrots go good with Pale Ale. Does anyone ever complain about the setup? Do you get offended when you pass through to get to the next isle? Sure you may pass through the different forums on this site, but it is clearly marked the "alcohol" section. (just for clarification in this case alcohol=RnR):biggrin1: While it is there and you clearly don't drink, do you pick up a bottle and throw it on the ground to protest it's existance? I don't. There are certain area's of this site I don't frequent, and there have been a few times I have felt offended about something, but I guess i am one of the few that ACTUALLY feels "to each his/her own" If you don't like it, stay out. If you are going to complain, stop reading. Don't go to the adult store if your not into body butter, fuzzy handcuffs, 'n porno. And if you do make it into the store, why are you complaining about whats in there? I'm finished now...:censored:

they wouldn't send me home with a precription for the dex, so I'm still in the "test" phase. I can only hope they got the numbers that I need. Yesterday I had another one of those frantic freaker/tweeker episodes. Heh, I'm sure I'd be arrested for being intoxicated in public! I ended up walking in a circle in my kitchen for over an hour... When my brain started to work again, I taught my spud boy how to make a drink for me. He's not wild about giving me booze, but alcohol and cortisol "eat" each other, so I can only hope that one or more stiff drinks will bring me out of it. I'm so tired of this. I went to bed lastnight at about 3 am, was wired until about 4:30, up again at 6am and then at 8 am again. I am pretty sure this UFC will be really high, but I don't "need" any more high UFCs.... And I'm rambling again.

I’m suffering. I’m rubbish. I’m a failure. I can’t do it. I didn’t think I should write about this on a weight loss surgery blog as it doesn’t entirely have relevance. Especially as I signed out almost two months ago saying I wouldn’t be writing any more. Ah, but how the slow winter nights of insomnia have a way of thrusting the urge to splurge upon one’s frame. So, why am I suffering? Why am I rubbish? A failure? And what exactly can’t I do? All will be revealed in the next exciting paragraph. With as much stalling as I can muster – I am slowly coming to the painful realisation that I might well be an alcoholic. Ouch. Did I say that? Well – I may not be an alcoholic, but indeed I am a heavy drinker. All who know me and love or hate me will vouch for that very fact. But when it comes to being a true alcoholic – the definitions seem so muddy, I am not sure. Or am I? I have no withdrawal symptoms when I stop and I am not dependent, but – I continue to drink despite the negative social effects, despite the financial drain on my less than healthy financial state and despite the effects it has on my health. This is where I am stretching the relevance to a weight loss issue. But lately, I am wondering whether it is more closely linked than I initially thought. Over the last few months, my progress into the halls of The Temple of Normal BMI has halted. My eating has lessened and my exercise has increased. My drinking has also picked up a tad. Goddammit, there lies the big bloody bastard bugger-face staring me straight in the eyes. I know it’s there. I can see it plainly and simply. Alcohol is causing me to not lose weight, despite being over-tightened on the band front. Alcohol is causing me to slowly lose friends. Alcohol is causing me to lose money. Alcohol is having great effects on my family life and alcohol is causing me to hate myself. So you can see the attraction I have to it, eh! I am writing this because I am so disappointed in myself and have used this outlet to vent and eventually feel better about the problems at hand. However, I don’t think this problem is going to be sorted by vitriolic venting. What has become clear in this whole gastric band journey is the addiction I had to food – and probably still do. You may well catch me of an evening desperately trying to eat a juicy steak. After each mouthful – running to the lavatory to expel what I have just swallowed as my band is currently just a little too tight. I could easily eat less cumbersome things to ensure ease of passage – but I want the steak. And I will return to the plate and repeat the same procedure perhaps four or five times. Because the band hasn’t cured my need to satisfy my desire for flesh! But it has offered me a way to control it should I so desire. It has helped me realise my addiction more than anything else. A knowledge which I am grateful for; but sometimes a little foolhardy with. I have so far, despite my pitfalls and apparent bulimic state, been relatively good with all other food (I won’t bore you with my chocolate rushes). Booze on the other hand has no control in place. I am at its mercy. In fact, I am at MY mercy. Let’s face it – I decide when to drink – I am aware and I am fully conscious of what it is doing. I was under the grand illusions as I started to lose weight that I would quit drinking. I know the reason I do it and it is sadly very simple. I do it because I am terribly shy. When I have had a drink however, I am quite the opposite. I become bombastic, gregarious and hugely annoying and people, despite their best efforts, can’t fail to notice me. Something in me likes that. The shy retiring giant hates being shy and retiring and craves people to remember him. Even if it means the memories for them are bad and the memories for me are non-existent. I figured it would be the end to my drinking because I wouldn’t be so shy. Losing weight would give me more confidence and make me more outgoing and allow me to stand tall and have conversations with people on an equal standing knowing that they were talking to a person, not a walrus. But, such is life that when a walrus loses weight – it is still a walrus. I am still painfully shy and I still find it difficult to talk to people. Maybe years of fatness have ingrained shyness into my psyche or maybe I am just shy because I am. The gastric band has given me a great opportunity to overcome some of my demons. An opportunity that I sometimes abuse and take for granted – time has a wonderful way of letting one forget their blessings. What it hasn’t done is offer me a cure for all of my other failings. Perhaps writing this will be the first step on another journey of self-discovery and perhaps it will just be another piece of prose that adds to my posthumous biography that will never be written. I decided to write this because I do feel it is of relevance to people considering having the surgery as it has shown me that I was perhaps a little over-eager to consider it the answer to my problems instead of a pretty good guide to help me find my own answers – a guide that is sometimes ignored. So, after that marathon outpouring of in most angst and in summation: I’m suffering - yes I am, but I am admitting I need help, so my suffering on that side of things is perhaps no longer in silence and it may well help my future efforts. I’m rubbish - yes again. But, I know I have a way to crawl out of the trash can. It’s just up to me to do it. I’m a failure - not entirely, because it’s not yet over. Maybe I can turn things around. I can’t do it - Yes I can. Originally posted at: www.lapbandblog.org.uk

I’m suffering. I’m rubbish. I’m a failure. I can’t do it. I didn’t think I should write about this on a weight loss surgery blog as it doesn’t entirely have relevance. Especially as I signed out almost two months ago saying I wouldn’t be writing any more. Ah, but how the slow winter nights of insomnia have a way of thrusting the urge to splurge upon one’s frame. So, why am I suffering? Why am I rubbish? A failure? And what exactly can’t I do? All will be revealed in the next exciting paragraph. With as much stalling as I can muster – I am slowly coming to the painful realisation that I might well be an alcoholic. Ouch. Did I say that? Well – I may not be an alcoholic, but indeed I am a heavy drinker. All who know me and love or hate me will vouch for that very fact. But when it comes to being a true alcoholic – the definitions seem so muddy, I am not sure. Or am I? I have no withdrawal symptoms when I stop and I am not dependent, but – I continue to drink despite the negative social effects, despite the financial drain on my less than healthy financial state and despite the effects it has on my health. This is where I am stretching the relevance to a weight loss issue. But lately, I am wondering whether it is more closely linked than I initially thought. Over the last few months, my progress into the halls of The Temple of Normal BMI has halted. My eating has lessened and my exercise has increased. My drinking has also picked up a tad. Goddammit, there lies the big bloody bastard bugger-face staring me straight in the eyes. I know it’s there. I can see it plainly and simply. Alcohol is causing me to not lose weight, despite being over-tightened on the band front. Alcohol is causing me to slowly lose friends. Alcohol is causing me to lose money. Alcohol is having great effects on my family life and alcohol is causing me to hate myself. So you can see the attraction I have to it, eh! I am writing this because I am so disappointed in myself and have used this outlet to vent and eventually feel better about the problems at hand. However, I don’t think this problem is going to be sorted by vitriolic venting. What has become clear in this whole gastric band journey is the addiction I had to food – and probably still do. You may well catch me of an evening desperately trying to eat a juicy steak. After each mouthful – running to the lavatory to expel what I have just swallowed as my band is currently just a little too tight. I could easily eat less cumbersome things to ensure ease of passage – but I want the steak. And I will return to the plate and repeat the same procedure perhaps four or five times. Because the band hasn’t cured my need to satisfy my desire for flesh! But it has offered me a way to control it should I so desire. It has helped me realise my addiction more than anything else. A knowledge which I am grateful for; but sometimes a little foolhardy with. I have so far, despite my pitfalls and apparent bulimic state, been relatively good with all other food (I won’t bore you with my chocolate rushes). Booze on the other hand has no control in place. I am at its mercy. In fact, I am at MY mercy. Let’s face it – I decide when to drink – I am aware and I am fully conscious of what it is doing. I was under the grand illusions as I started to lose weight that I would quit drinking. I know the reason I do it and it is sadly very simple. I do it because I am terribly shy. When I have had a drink however, I am quite the opposite. I become bombastic, gregarious and hugely annoying and people, despite their best efforts, can’t fail to notice me. Something in me likes that. The shy retiring giant hates being shy and retiring and craves people to remember him. Even if it means the memories for them are bad and the memories for me are non-existent. I figured it would be the end to my drinking because I wouldn’t be so shy. Losing weight would give me more confidence and make me more outgoing and allow me to stand tall and have conversations with people on an equal standing knowing that they were talking to a person, not a walrus. But, such is life that when a walrus loses weight – it is still a walrus. I am still painfully shy and I still find it difficult to talk to people. Maybe years of fatness have ingrained shyness into my psyche or maybe I am just shy because I am. The gastric band has given me a great opportunity to overcome some of my demons. An opportunity that I sometimes abuse and take for granted – time has a wonderful way of letting one forget their blessings. What it hasn’t done is offer me a cure for all of my other failings. Perhaps writing this will be the first step on another journey of self-discovery and perhaps it will just be another piece of prose that adds to my posthumous biography that will never be written. I decided to write this because I do feel it is of relevance to people considering having the surgery as it has shown me that I was perhaps a little over-eager to consider it the answer to my problems instead of a pretty good guide to help me find my own answers – a guide that is sometimes ignored. So, after that marathon outpouring of in most angst and in summation: I’m suffering - yes I am, but I am admitting I need help, so my suffering on that side of things is perhaps no longer in silence and it may well help my future efforts. I’m rubbish - yes again. But, I know I have a way to crawl out of the trash can. It’s just up to me to do it. I’m a failure - not entirely, because it’s not yet over. Maybe I can turn things around. I can’t do it - Yes I can. Originally posted at: www.lapbandblog.org.uk

I think you need to go back to basics. Always eat your Protein first at meals. Make sure you meet your Fluid, protein and Vitamin requirements. According to my nutritionist, most individuals that gain weight back after surgery are due to grazing (snacking). Your case is probably an exception. I am 2 years post-op from RNY. My weight loss is stable. I do graze but I graze on fats. Fats take away hunger. I have a cup of coffee in the morning with a giant scope of home made real whip cream. I make it myself so I exclude sugar. I strictly stay away from sugar and use low calorie sweeteners such as Stevia and no calorie artificial sweeteners such as Splenda. I also use sugar alcohol found in Atkin's treats. But that is the method I have found that works for me. You might also have to go back to measuring the volume of food for each meal to lower your portion size.