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I agree with a statement above regarding that the marriage was not a happy marriage before only because the person stayed in the marriage because that was comfortable with them and their weight. My husband and I were on the same page we are doing this (he didn't have surgery but is on a diet) to become a healthier family unit. I was skinny when I met my husband but he has stuck with me throughout my weight gain and NEVER commented on my body figure once. I love him with all of my heart.........I couldn't imagine a divorce after this. He is my soul mate and we have a wonderful little family. I can see how it could be hard if you are married to an extremely unhealthy person after this who continues to make you day to day lifestyle change hard for you. But in that case I think the other person may need to be talked, I know my hubby cheats but he hides all temptation from me. He does this to make my transition easier.

Nighttime snacking is definitely my downfall also. I eat a semi healthy Breakfast, lunch, and dinner (only eating 6-8 bites) but start my mindless snacking at nite when I lie in bed and watch tv. Thought about making my bedroom off limits for food. I have 22 lbs to get to goal and I made a deal with myself last month. I'd start trying to lose again after the holidays. Until then, I'm happy maintaining. Hubby also gained 40 lbs over the last 9 mths since he's been eating carbs willy nilly (he's usually an Atkins fan) and also has plans of starting Atkins Induction on Jan 2nd. So while I won't be doing Atkins, I can certainly cut down on my bad carbs and cut out the nighttime snacking. And my nightly glass of red wine - of course while in bed. I'm hoping my eating carbs (not to mention that we recently moved in with my FIL and hubbys daughter. MIL passed away 2 mths ago so we're helping out FIL) and others eating carbs (I don't eat much so I never really caused him to stumble but now that there's 2 other people in the household, not sure whats gunna happen) don't make my husband stumble. Anyway, as I was saying, I know where ur coming from. Snacking is the culprit on much of our weight gain or at least preventing us from losing. And I don't mean 1/2 an apple with PB. I'm talking a handful of cheese Its, a scoop of ice cream, 1/2 PB and banana sandwich, a few bits of dinner leftovers, a handful of corn nuts, 5-10 Hershey Kisses (who can resist the green and red ones at holiday time?), an ice cream sandwich, or 1/2 Starbucks biscotti. All things I've snacked on this past week So on jan 2nd, I will ban all food in my bedroom. That oughta help take off the final 22 lbs (albeit slowly. I know the last 20 are the hardest) Good luck to u too!

Because in the back of your head somewhere she is right sorta..Every other diet tried the weight lost reappeared with extra...It is one of the major fear of losing weight...It can happen if we get lazy or to confident.. So 2 things are important.. 1) Fix the head and the body will benefit from it.. 2) never let your guard down. Keep a weight gain number in your head and revert back to the beginnings of the sleeve to lose it....weighing yourself once a week, not becoming obsessive with it... She said that because that is what everyone does who diets traditionally...You have taken a huge leap to make it permanent. But we both know it will be a life long battle!

I would say "Don't worry, you'll be able to eat all those things," but I don't want it to sound like encouragement! No but truly, you will probably be able to eat most foods you loved pre-op once you have recovered from surgery and your stomach heals. The decision to NOT eat those foods is when the real work begins, because eating around the surgery is self-sabotage and will probably lead to weight gain. Post op, I really miss 3 things: pizza, diet soda, and cake. I mean, really. LOL, sometimes I obsess about those things but I make a choice not to eat them - otherwise, why did I have this huge surgery? My desire for cake, etc, hasn't disappeared, but I'm more motivated to lose weight than I am to buy and eat that piece of cake from the bakery. Post-op, I spend a lot of time thinking about food -- food I should eat and food I shouldn't eat. It's a battle every single day to make the right choices. Thank god I had the surgery to help me along - otherwise, what's the point?

Getting the lapband out was worse than getting my gallbladder removed. It took me a long time to recover from that surgery even though I had an excellent surgeon, I just felt like the anesthesia was in my system for a LONG time. Also, I was forbidden to workout beyond walking around slightly. Not moving really slows healing. That was a rough two year period after the lapband of being severely anemic and sick and not having anyone know what was going on but not being allowed to exercise (to the point of not being permitted to go up stairs or lift more than 10 pounds, etc.). The ability to move and exercise is a gift you don't appreciate until you are forbidden to do those things. I'm SO oppositional defiant. Tell me I am not allowed to workout and it's all I want to do! Suffice to say I gained a lot of weight back (all 70 pounds lost on the band and then some) when I was sick. The weight gain leads to depression, the depression leads to emotional eating, vicious cycle...etc... Can't wait to get a fresh start in 2014 with you all! We got this!

You are such a great inspiration.. I am also anemic and I know how you feel Brrrr.... I had a complete unfil in Oct and my first re-fil on Dec 3. I was able to eat anything I wanted to on Thanksgiving and boy did the scale show it, I was not happy with the weight gain but now I am losing again becoming more active in working out!! Congrats to you at almost being at goal weight!

I would LOVE to replace the band with the 14cc band. .. but I guess im scared ill end up w the same issues. Im completely unfilled n throw up constantly with the 10cc. I kinda think my body needs a break. Im scared of weight gain too. However I eat soooo much healthier now. I love green smoothies, raw veggies, raw eating, clean eating. I follow amazing weight loss motivators on instagram. I also have become anemic and my primary seems to think due to lack of nutrients from lapband. So it restricts the amount of exercise bc I get light headed, dizzy, and nauseous. I guess I am just tired... emotional... and at my wits end.Sigh.

I was fat before I became fat. Eventually my physical appearance matched how I felt on the inside. During high school I was always 140 but felt like I was obese. Hated my body. My rituals with eating began early.... Ohhhhh Snickers bars eating all around the outsides, then the nougat on the bottom. Then each bite after that I would let melt in my mouth. It was like making love to my food. Everything I loved to eat had some sort of ritualized eating pattern associated with it. I always had food battles with my parents. Now I realize it was all about control. I would have to sit at the kitchen table for hours because there were certain foods I refused to eat. I would get nauseous just thinking about them, then and now. Grits, eggs, black eyed peas just a few on a very long list. To this day I don't indulge in those foods, lol. My siblings, cousins and I would have food parties. My idea of course. We all would buy something from the store with our money we'd been saving. Then go on the back porch and divide the goods. We called it a picnic. As a teenager I would by a snack from the store and hide it under my mattress. Depending on how I felt I would finish it in a day or maybe 2, a whole box of Little Debbie Pies. When I moved out on my own at 18 I really settled into my food addiction. Until this point my binges hadn't resulted in weight gain. There was no turning back. I wasn't aware that what I was doing was blocking feelings of low self worth. Giving myself love the only way I knew how. I did not connect all the childhood abuse to my eating. I was just trying to survive. A young adult and teenage mom trying desperately to make ends meet. Too bad it's taken me many more abuses as an adult and reaching the age of 41 to began mending my mind. When you know better you do better. In therapy for a year doing the dance of one step forward two back. Thankful to have just taken a big leap forward.

Sometimes the stress can add to your weight gain. I was told I had to give up my lemonade and almost fell out of my chair. I haven't switched to the crystal light yet (it's been six months). Maybe you can try limiting to 1-2 a day for a while and slowly wean off of them? Believe me I know it's hard giving up some of the things you have become comfortable with (for years). Don't get discouraged, it will happen. Now when I look in the mirror I tell myself "I'm done looking like this". I made Cookies for us yesterday and I threw them away. YES, threw them away. I have NEVER done that. Mentally I am just DONE with being big. I was nowhere near this state month’s back. I was not motivated and I was discouraged. Just take it day by day and try to find something new that helps curb your hunger. Good luck to you!

So I'm in the Options program with Kaiser and I'm just over a month into the six months of classes that they require of you in San Diego. I thought that by the time I was starting the class that I would be super focused on weight loss and going strong towards the 10% weight loss that Kaiser requires before having surgery. I even bought a fitbit to track my calories, but I returned it because I was doing better tracking everything through the site I was using in the first place. I know that I still have tons of time to lose that, but I don't know why the classes are so discouraging. I thought I would be getting good info on how to prep for surgery and what to expect after (I'm sure they will get to some of that at some point) but over a month in and I don't feel like I'm getting anything from the classes, so I'm just not amped about weight loss. Some of the people are in fact driving me nuts!! How can you say that you have tried EVERYTHING to lose weight but you don't realize that you can't eat grits with butter and bacon every morning and still lose weight?!?! Really!! So I'm letting it effect me in a negative way. I've definitely got that "I need to eat this while i still can" mentality and I've actually gained weight. I guess Im kinda just venting and looking for advice. I know what I need to do, It just seems that I can't get it started and the weight gain I've had in the past weeks is making me feel worse. Thanks for any thoughts!!

Hey guys! Another lurker here! I've been reading all of your stories from day 1 and keep coming everyday to check the thread! I found pieces of my life in each and every story and at times it was hard to read some of them and not get chocked up. You guys made me think about my own life and my own issues , even though for the last 5 years I put them in a box in the back of my head and slowly I started to let them go and I'm happier since . Well, mainly because 5 years ago I left "home" (Romania) and moved far away, to the UK. I found that since that happened I'm loving my dad more and even can't wait to see him every 6 months when I go back to visit . This wouldn't have happened if I were still living there. I met my wonderful husband when I moved here and he changed me for the better! I'm so happy I let go of the anger I had, but that only happened about 3 years after I left home, it took some time. But In all honesty, my story is not a dark one, I can't be hypocritical and say otherwise, I had a fairly happy childhood and was blessed with good friends growing up for whom my weight was never a problem. I don't know why I overate all my life. My earliest memory of me overheating was when I was around 7-8 years old and mom made donuts. And I also had to do homework. I remember sitting on the sofa with a big bowl of donuts and eating ..and eating..and ..eating.. My parents told this story over the years, fondly remembering how I was stuffing myself just to get out of homework. Now, knowing myself.. I'm sure it was because ..I loved to eat and never knew when to stop, not because of homework. I've always been a tall muscular child and until 15-17 I wasn't actually fat but since I was very young I heard how I was "fatter than other kids". My dad always called me "fatty" but in romanian(sounds a tad better in romanian) and he kind of sounded sweet, for him it really was a term of endearment ..so for me..it was very normal to be the "fatty" around..looking back..I really wasn't..and probably that's how it started. Every time we would go visit relatives, my dad would embarrass me in front of the others, telling me to stop eating . I don't remember a time when we went places as a family where I didn't cry. All my life I heard how I was "too sensitive and cry always" .. But in their defence..I cried a lot, as a kid, as a teenager, as a young adult..all that changed when I left the country...hmmm..I wonder why? Well, because I'm finally surrounded my lovely people that won't put me down at every step. My mom is a wonderful person , always doing everything for everyone, dad is a good person as well and always told me how much he loves me and my brother, always hugging us, but at the same time...he was always angry, always telling us we're doing everything wrong, we're good for nothing, etc.. It was so confusing.. He would yell at us, and threaten us with some butt whooping and in 10 minutes he would come over ,hugged us and told us, we're just "too sensitive" and that he loved us. So that's why I have mixed feelings and can't say my childhood wasn't a good one. But it wasn't the greatest either. I remember sooooo many times around the dinner table when my dad would yell and I would keep my head down, tears were running down my face straight in to the food that I wouldn't touch. And then it started with secretly eating, hiding food, eating very very fast while they were away, etc. Also, my boyfriend of 4 years in Romania.. Would not hold my hand in public and wouldn't act like we were together even though..well,everyone knew about us, as we were in a big great group of friends. That, of course, wasn't great for my self esteem and of course, made me eat even more. Where I come from, people think its just ok to tell someone how fat they are and to make them feel like they're worthless. I was working in a school in Romania and when I gave my 2 weeks notice because I was moving to the Uk, the principal wished me all the best and she added : "now you'll fit better in the society, people are fatter in the UK" or something to that effect. But again, the way they're saying these things.. They don't mean to hurt you..they genuinely think its ok to say these thing..its a damn cultural thing, I don't know. I think there are so many issues that contributed to my weight gain over the years, but I also think greed was also a biiiiig factor. I've been sleeved 6 months ago and lost 80 pounds so far and in a month we're going to Romania to visit my parents, brother and friends..and it is for the first time when I don't secretly wish that something bad would happen that would cause us to postpone the trip, this time, I don't feel so ashamed..and for the first tine, my brother won't grab my tummy and say: come on, what's with all this fat?are you pregnant or something? Mmmmmmyeah, and that would be the very first second he would see me at the airport..wasn't very anxious to see my parents and hear similar things, how I get fatter and fatter every time I come home. I think my dad made amends with me in his own weird way and paid for my gastric sleeve surgery, as I didn't have any chances of paying for it myself . He did not pressure me into it, it was my idea but when I first told him I want to have the surgery.. His face lit up, its like I could read on his face the joy and the anticipation that he'll finally have a normal looking daughter. Oh well, so so many things to say..and I really wrote way too much. I'm so sorry for the long post, I just don't know where to start..where to end..but I wanted to write a post too, as I felt bad lurking around and reading all your stories.. Anyhow, sending you all happy thoughts and you're all so brave and I respect you so much, after reading everything..all I can say is ..you are a bunch of tough cookies !

That first drop is so exciting but there is the leveling off and even sometimes a gain prior to getting fill right and adopting to new lifestyle. I lost 10 pre-op, 10 immediately post-op, then another 4-5 which I then regained. Just got that off again following my first fill. I recognize there will be ups and downs, water weight gain and loss, etc., but I know I'm on my way to good health no matter what. You are, too!

Do you sometimes suffer from head hunger? Do you sometimes find your self munching on something and ask your self why? Do you feel remorse and quilt after you eat sometimes and don't understand why you ate that? Well you are not alone, many of us, me included still suffer from these very triggers that cause head hunger even after WLS. Our surgery did not fix our brains or stop us from putting unhealthy food in out bodies. It takes months and years and constant reminding to undo unhealthy behaviors. The one thing that can really sabotage a WLS patient is themselves. Once we start down a self destructive path we can easily justify why we are doing what we are doing. How many of you have lied to your self about taking just one bite, when you really ate the who thing? Grazers sometimes have more difficulty with WLS than binge eaters. It is much easier to graze then it is to binge after WLS that is why it is so important to learn what your eating triggers are and to learn how to deal with head hunger early in your journey. I often surf the internet looking for ideas that may help me to stay true to my healthy self and like to share with others in thoughts that it may help someone else. Everyone has to individulize their journey and has to learn how they can best cope with this change in life style. Some of the tips for dealing with head hunger suggests things that if you are a WLS person like myself, you cannot do. We cannot bulk up on low calorie foods or eat big salads, we cannot drink soup before our protein meals to fill us up and we cannot drink large volumes of water at one time when we are eating. If these things worked for us we would not have had WLS. As a bariatric patient we must learn to deal with our triggers and behaviors that sabatoge us. I found what I consider a good article this morning that I would like to share with all of you. The article is from the Obesity Help web site. http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/mental-health/Head-Hunger-Coping-with-Your-Triggers-for-Overeating.html Head Hunger - Coping with Your Triggers for Overeating by Michelle May, MD Do you sometimes confuse “head hunger” with “body hunger”? If you’re sensitive to food cues, weight management becomes much easier when you’re able to recognize the triggers in your environment and break the associations that lead you to overeat simply out of habit. Let’s take a look at just a few of the common triggers for overeating and strategies for coping more effectively. By the Clock: Society programs us to follow a schedule, so like Pavlov’s dog, we’ve learned to salivate when the bell rings. The reality is that it’s more convenient to eat at certain times than others, so it takes effort to listen to your hunger cues. Strategy: Though it’s challenging to change this routine, you can adapt it to fit your own needs. Learn to pace yourself by observing your natural hunger rhythms. You’ll probably notice that you get hungry every three to six hours, depending on what and how much you ate at your last meal and how active you’ve been. Keep a healthy snack handy to satisfy hunger that doesn’t conform to mealtimes. If you’re consistently tempted to snack right before a meal, consider moving the mealtime up or adding more protein to your previous snack. High-Risk Times: Many people have times of the day that are high-risk for overeating. For example, you may experience a late-afternoon energy slump or a tendency to munch when you come home from work to transition into your evening. Strategy: Know when you’re most at risk and develop an alternate strategy. For example, create a Recharge Ritual or Transition Time that helps you relax or unwind. Save a favorite magazine or book to read, call a friend or walk your dog instead. Create a list of things to do instead of eating. Keep the list (and any necessary supplies) handy and make a commitment to try one of these activities before eating simply out of habit. ‘Tis the Season: Be aware of your seasonal and weather-related cues for eating. Holidays can be especially difficult because of all of the social ties to certain foods and even certain people. Many of the foods you eat during this time may seem “special,” and therefore, harder to eat in sensible quantities. Strategy: These occasions repeat themselves, so you can anticipate what typically occurs and create a plan for dealing with your triggers. Make it a point to really listen to your body instead of the external cues when making your food choices. Also, keep in mind that special foods will be even more special when you eat them mindfully when you’re hungry, focusing on the appearance and flavors of the food, the ambiance, the other people and the reason you’re all together. Tempting Displays: Seeing displays of food like candy or nuts in dishes and tempting foods when you open your cabinet or refrigerator can trigger you to want those foods. Strategy: Out of sight, out of mind. Don’t use food as decorations or leave appetizing foods in plain view. Try putting tempting foods behind other foods in your cabinets and refrigerator. If a co-worker keeps food out, ask him or her to put it in a drawer instead. Media: Food is everywhere in television and magazines (ironically, often right next to the articles about the latest wonder diet!). Strategy: Get yourself a glass of water during commercials, avoid watching programs that focus on food and skip quickly over the food ads and recipes. Break the habit of eating while watching television—usually a mindless, high-calorie activity. Location, Location, Location: If you eat in front of the TV, in bed or standing in the kitchen, you may feel an urge to eat just from being in those places. Strategy: Try to eat only while sitting at a table. Make it a family rule to limit eating to one or two rooms in the house. This will decrease triggers like TV and reading and help you focus on enjoying your food without distractions. Biggie Size: Restaurants often serve overly large portions to make their customers feel that they are getting value. Strategy: Be prepared to have extra food wrapped up to go as soon as you feel satisfied, or estimate how much you think you’ll need and wrap up the rest even before you start eating. If you leave the food sitting in front of you, you’ll be more likely to keep nibbling. Remind yourself that you’ll get to enjoy that food again when you’re hungry. You can also share an entrée or order an appetizer-sized portion. Forbidden Food Syndrome: Although it’s a popular topic of conversation, the mere discussion of dieting can trigger feelings of deprivation and cravings. Just thinking about restrictive dieting has been shown to increase food intake. Strategy: Decrease the amount of time you spend talking about food, weight and dieting. Depend on your physical hunger cues to let you know when it’s time to eat. By learning to recognize and cope more effectively with your head hunger, you’ll begin to break free from old, problematic habits. You’ll find yourself eating less, feeling more satisfied and meeting your needs more appropriately. To get a one-page handout called “101 Things to Do Instead of Eating When You’re NOT Hungry,” visit http://amihungry.com/enews.shtml. Food and Feelings Emotions are common triggers for eating. People sometimes eat to cope with stress, distract themselves from difficult emotions or stuff down feelings they don’t know how to express in a healthier manner. However, boredom, anger, anxiety, loneliness, stress and other feelings are a natural part of our lives, and eating won’t make them go away. In fact, eating in response to these feelings disconnects you from important information about what you need. For example, “I want brownies” might really mean “I want comfort,” “I need a reward,” “I wish I had a friend to talk to” or “I wish I could tell you how I really feel.” The food you eat to deal with feelings comes with strings attached—weight gain and regret. But more importantly, it denies you the opportunity to discover and satisfy your true needs. Since eating cannot meet your emotional needs, those unmet needs trigger overeating again and again. The way to break out of this pattern is to stop judging yourself when you overeat and instead try to figure out what you needed that drove you to eat when you weren’t physically hungry. Examining your current eating behavior can be a powerful source of information about your inner self and your true needs and wants. Once you have identified the emotions that triggered the urge to eat, seek ways to comfort, nurture, calm and distract yourself without turning to food. Michelle May, MD, a physician and recovered yo-yo dieter, is the author of Am I Hungry? What to Do When Diets Don’t Work, available at www.AmIHungry.com.

oh sweetheart...you've just started. first of all, ten pounds is amazing. second...you will have stalls, weight gains, plateaus, etc. just focus on following your doc's protocol, which it sounds like you are doing, and the weight will come off. Remember...you didn't gain it overnight, and you won't lose it that way either. I bet that three months from now, you'll have a nice weight loss and maybe even be in smaller sizes. WORD. While you are healing from surgery, your body is going to change and your weight is going to naturally fluctuate. I am sixteen days out and only stepped in a scale once because I needed to be seen by a primary care health care provider. Otherwise, I am avoiding scales except for when i am seen at my surgeon's office because I feel so strongly that right now is not the time to be worrying about weight loss, but to be concentrating on healing, recovering and setting myself up for a healthier future.

oh sweetheart...you've just started. first of all, ten pounds is amazing. second...you will have stalls, weight gains, plateaus, etc. just focus on following your doc's protocol, which it sounds like you are doing, and the weight will come off. Remember...you didn't gain it overnight, and you won't lose it that way either. I bet that three months from now, you'll have a nice weight loss and maybe even be in smaller sizes.

Please don't set yourself up for failure. There is no average weight loss and 13 days post op might find you with a weight gain due to swelling, fluids, etc. Just take this journey to wherever it leads you and know that as long as you follow your doctor's guidelines, you should do well. Good luck!

I am 65, I had my surgery at 61. I was 245, I lost 100 lbs, but over the last 2 years gained about 30 lbs. I am currently following my alorie count and excerise on myfitnesspal app on my phone. It really seems to be helping me be aware of my calorie intake. I was not very careful of slider foods and that will cause weight gain although you are not aware of eating muuch. My daughter, son, and I are our support group. By the way, my surgery was Oct 30, 2009, and I joined here in Nov 2009. You can send to me directly, if you wish. Exercise is important, too, get your daughter to join you, start with walks. that is about all I do, now. Best wishes. Karen

I suggested in a previous response that you may want to consider increasing daily caloric intake to create a good metabolic burn rate with respect to intense work outs like insanity. Try this. Your weight may increase slightly until your body adapts to the new homeostasis (give yourself at least 6 weeks to "fix" the metabolic burn rate). The temporary weight gain is just water under the bridge. No need to get angry about it. It just is. The weight will drop again. Eating far fewer calories then calorie requirements will unfortunately lead to low metabolic burn rates. Generally, sub 1200 daily calories are reserved for new post ops. Once you move into vet territory and are wishing to find a way of eating for life, most doctors / nuts would suggest eating closer to 2000 calories daily in a nutritionally balanced fashion combined with moderate exercise. That is just my opinion and I am only stating to help. I think others would agree. Good luck. You are going to find success.

Well Brown, you sound like Steven...ha. I actually think you hit alot on the head here. Basically he has a loving personality and he has this problem of women getting attached to him... and yet he is NOT boyfriend material (financially irresponsible, terrible time management, lives by crisis, impulsive and selfish in many ways. etc). He told me he has broken hearts and it breaks his heart when that happens. It scares him because it always ends that way. His last girlfriend "wasted" 5 years on him and he wants to be sure I don't do that. Of course there is a fundamental difference - I met him with the intention of not having a long term and we have talked alot about this. Last night we had a very long talk about things and he really appreciated that I shared details of feedback about himself. I told him about my complex emotions on it and he was very interested because i summed it up that "you make me feel good when I am with and I like feeling good so I want to keep seeing you". It was like a lightbulb went off - he said he does that to everyone (colleagues, customers, men, women whatever) and he often disappoints because he can't really be "that person" to everybody. He told me he loves me... like he loves his friends... a word I won't use because it means alot of different things, but I told him about my complex feelings - drawn to him and yet have no desire to have a LTR or get sucked into his chaos. So, what he wants me to do is start dating others (ie maintaining our exclusive agreement due to STD risk) and he said it will take me a long time to find the right person so he wants to keep seeing me. I think that will work for awhile, but i do need him to make some adjustments and we'll see if that happens. I warned him though, I am one of those people that think about stuff for a long time, patient, analytical - but then I just DO... in a blink of an eye... and often those decisions are justified by my analysis, but really are made emotionally. I don't mean to say that is a good thing about myself, but it is how I am. Bottom line though - my headspace on other men is that i am just not that interested. I went on a "meet for a drink" yesterday and the guy was really nice but I felt like I was having a drink with someone from work. No spark. Then I get in a position of having to politely tell perfectly nice men... eh, not interested. I don't like doing that. I need to get tougher. I think there is someone out there that will turn my head but I will need to meet about 100 to find him. BTW, feedback is... and it is like a shocked "Wow" response that I look much better in person than my crappy photos. I don't know why i can't get a decent photo of myself. I used a cropped version of my thanksgiving pic which I thought was cute. I met this guy after work, so by then my hair was frizzy and my makeup was less than fresh and he still thought i was way cuter in person... nice compliment but also feedback that if i want to improve my odds of attracting the personality I am looking for (he is the guy every woman wants I am sure) I need to seriously figure out my pictures. Maybe Steven will help me with photos...haha Globe - he is 16 years older, very interesting comparison to your situation (and another reason I don't want a LTR with him). We generally only see each other maybe 2-4 times a month and only talk a few times a week, so it isn't that bad, but it is very similar and it does feel sort of addictive... like I am seeking a physical endorphin rush. weird. There is a book called 5 Love Languages. I scored very high on needing verbal affirmations and physical contact and he provides both somehow in a way that just makes me feel good. From day one, it is like he does everything "right" in ways I didn't even know i was seeking. That is kinda similiar to receiving the physical care after surgery - I didn't realize how much I wanted to feel that comfort of the caring. It was really my counselor who pointed it out. It is a strange thing to realize about oneself, how much I want to feel that being cared for. It is also good self insight to keep from getting in a relationship with someone who a. doesnt provide that (that would be my history!) OR b. provides it and manipulates with it. On the Insanity thing, I am not sure it is a great idea for your overall health. Super intense workouts deplete your reserves so I would really wonder. However, the weight gain you should NOT worry about. Your muscles are simply holding more water, it is a normal response to that kind of workout. The pounds DO start melting eventually.

I've heard of not losing weight after 3 weeks, but gaining?! I'm up 2 pounds overnight! I haven't lost since before Thanksgiving. I am eating more than I was right after surgery, but the food I eat in a day now is a lot less than the food I ate in one meal pre-op. I'm not really exercising like I should, I admit, but I am taking steps to be more active, like parking further from the entrance to stores, taking the stairs (not hard, I'm scared of elevators haha), and I usually take a walk around campus between classes. I only go to school twice a week though. It's very depressing, really. I mean, I wake up everyday feeling like I'm going to pass out, I'm weak and get tired easily, and for what?! Weight gain?! UGHH I'm not losing inches either. I'm still in the same pants I wore 30 pounds ago.

39 lbs. may not seem like a lot to you right now, but it's more than 10% of your body weight lost. That is significant. I have read lots of posts here where menstrual cycles started again (if they had stopped due to weight gain) or became more regular. My cycle was not the most reliable pre-op. After about 2 months, it is like clockwork. As with anything that dramatically changes, check with your doctor and let them know what is going on just to be on the safe side.

I am scheduled for 12/12 and I am still grappling with the decision. I have 2 preschoolers and I'm torn between wanting to be slimmer and more energetic as a mother, and being terrified that I'll die or become disabled, etc. I don't think I've ever spent so much time and research on a decision. There just is no easy answer and the lack of very long term data is rough. Ultimately, though, I keep moving forward because my risk of diabetes or even more weight gain is much higher than the risk of surgery. Sometimes I just wish the answer would magically appear!! I wish I'd know about this surgery before I had kids--I'd have done it without a second thought. All we can do is research and reflect and hope we choose correctly. Good luck!

My name is Alex and I'm a 39 year old male living in Tennessee. I am divorced with three children. My highest weight was 323 and I became more and more concerned with my overall health condition. In 2007 I was diagnosed with sleep apnea, and just two years ago, atrial fibrillation. When it was suggested that all of these problems could be related to my obesity, I started looking for more extreme ways to try to lose weight. I have struggled with weight gain my entire life, trying all kinds of diets, losing 60 pounds when I was 16 but gaining it back by the time I was 22. My ex-wife had Roux en Y surgery in 2007, and had a dramatic weight loss. Unfortunately, she did not heed the advice of the doctors and dieticians and never took her supplements, so the weight came right back within two years. This has turned me away from having the surgery until a mutual friend of hers, a lap bander, had me speak to another friend who had recently had the gastric sleeve surgery, which I had not heard of until earlier this summer. I got very excited after researching the surgery and called my insurance company for physicians in network who perform it. I signed up for a consultation with the Vanderbilt Center for Surgical Weight Loss in Nashville in July and that is when I was sure this was the right time and the right thing to do. When the surgeon, Dr. Brandon Williams came in during the presentation I realized I went to high school with him and felt another sense of ease since we already knew one another. I had complete encouragement from my parents, my fiancée, and my personal physician, who wrote the letter of recommendation for me to have the surgery. And my insurance company was very easy to deal with, and only required a few standard prerequisites prior to having the surgery. (Psych eval, attendance of support group, evidence of trying other diets, etc). Four months later my surgery took place 11/21/2013. My only complication during the surgery was during post op; my heart went into atrial fibrillation while I was in the recovery room. I was moved to the cardiology floor at Vanderbilt for monitoring. The first night in the hospital was spent seeing many cardiologist trying to figure out how to get my heart rate below 130 where it stayed for hours. By morning, it was down to the 80s, since I was able to take my beta blockers crushed (yuck!). I was discharged the next day since my heart rate was back in the 60s. It has almost been 2 weeks since I had the surgery, and the only pain I feel is in my right side around the ribs, which is close to where they removed most of my stomach. I am now past the soft foods stage and can drink and eat ok, long as I resist the temptation to eat too big of a bite of food. I still crave the old foods I am no longer allowed to eat, but am putting in the toughest battle to stay with this diet by the book. I am 27 pounds down and hope to lose more and when I return to work I hope I can keep in control of my daily diet. That's enough about me... Good luck to everyone out there. I feel good about what I have done, no regrets.

Hey girlfriends, So of course, as my surgery date draws near, I've been thinking a lot about my upcoming "sleevization" and all my previous weight loss attempts. My last big weight loss was in 2010/2011. I worked HARD dieting and exercising (sometimes for 2 hours a night 3 days a week) and went from 270 to 187lbs. Size 22 to 14 (and some 12's). It was SUCH a struggle and such a victory. I've battled with weight my entire life and had REALLY made a lifestyle change. I became a beast in the gym and truly evolved from an exercise hater to an exercise lover. Right towards the end of my journey, I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease and got pretty sick. Couldn't really exercise anymore and thus, my healthy lifestyle went right out the winda! After a few months on prednisone (the devils choice pharmaceutical), I had gained a whopping 50lbs. Once I got there, I just said "FML" (f*** my life) and spiraled into a pity party complete with cakes, ice cream, donuts, Cookies, etc. Shortly after that, a bipolar II diagnosis came along. Perfect timing right? More meds, more weight gain and here I am at 279lbs. As I gained the weight back, I furiously put ALL of my cute little clothes into plastic bin exile because looking at them was even more excruciating than my disease. As I've now made the decision to try to end this lifelong nightmare by having VSG, I have new hope for myself and my life. So, last night I pulled those bins out of the closet in my spare bedroom. I smelled and touched them. I imagined myself back in those clothes. I remembered how cute and sexy I was. I began to really, really miss the girl who used to wear those clothes. I broke out into full on sobs holding those clothes in my hands. I cried for the loss of who I was. I cried because a bunch of things beyond my control started my descent back to this place. I cried because instead of getting back on track after getting off prednisone (which I will NEVER go on again), I gave up on my healthy lifestyle AND I gave up on myself. I cried because I MISSED working out IMMENSELY but felt too much shame in my fat body to go back to the gym. Lastly, I cried because I knew that soon, I'd be making my way back into those clothes. That vision moved me very deeply. It was much more of an emotional experience than I expected. I'll be back in those clothes again. It's the most empowering, assuring feeling I think I've ever felt. Have any of you had experiences like this or am I the only assclown sitting in the closet and crying while clutching clothes I can't even stuff a calf into?

Some doctors want you to stay on liquids 24 hours after a fill. Then you can eat mushies and soft foods. Now train yoru brain to eat properly, the Fills will NOT do this. I have 6.5cc in a 14cc Allergan Omiform band. And if I eat the wrong foods for 2-3 days I will see a weight gain. Best wishes and keep the Faith.