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I agree with the above posters. You will want to be as healthy as possible to raise the wonderful children you will have. Also, congratulations on your current weight loss!

I was hoping that Alex would bring back the chat rooms here, since it's an exclusive weight loss community, the chat rooms would be nice to chat in a group setting about topics specific to weight loss surgeries and topics important to this community.

I did the sleeve at over 400 lbs. Reasons to pick sleeve: 1. It's a shorter operation time so safer for a high-risk person under anesthesia. 2. If you don't lose enough you can convert to bypass whereas bypass is a one shot deal. Bypass does yield faster results though. As you can see my weight loss is still going in the second year. I think for some people that would be discouraging but I'm looking at this as a marathon.

It seems I celebrated too early 😬 I have completely stalled since January 26 (4 weeks ago). Weight loss was already “slow” in December and January but now I’m stuck. Any ideas to get out? I’ve already “played” around with my calories though I could truthfully do more exercise. Maybe that’s whats needed now? I’m seeing my nut. on Wednesday. Oh also! I’m *this* close to fitting into a size 16 (started at a tight fitting 24) 🤗 Some dresses will already fit, others are still tight especially around the boobs lol Soon though, I hope!

No. No revisions. It's my first weight loss surgery! I can't wait! I'm excited [emoji16]!!! Sent from my SM-G960U1 using BariatricPal mobile app

Seems some surgeons recommend bypass over sleeve based on the patient’s weight loss history as well as their health. Bypass is generally considered the stronger surgery but the stats on the success of either surgery & how much weight loss is possible are pretty similar. I mean, they do sleeves on people who started at more than 600lbs on My 600lb Life & they lose weight. Yes, sleeve changes less of your digestive system & malabsorption issues rarely occur, but your general health status, like pre existing reflux/Gerd, may mean bypass is your best way forward.

Oh, he’s one of those who think surgery is cheating or easy. This is a much harder way to lose weight than just going on a diet & exercise program. You’re also contending with recovery from your surgery. The diet is more restrictive to begin than many other diets. Your tummy can become more sensitive or fussy about certain foods for a while. You have greater accountability with your surgeon, dietician, GP, therapist & of course your self watching over & monitoring your progress. (You also get all their support too of course.) I did a lot of research & learnt more about food choices, general nutrition, my own nutritional needs, my emotional & physical health, etc. than I ever did on any of the hundreds of diets I did in the past. Many find therapy very helpful on their weight loss journey & it may be beneficial for your husband too. Someone impartial he can work through his feelings about the surgery & any fears he may have about how it will affect/change you & may be your relationship. All the best.

@Arabesque Thanks for the thoughtful response. The experimenting is part of the fun. And this forum is great for guidance. Understanding normal after 30+ years of bad habits, bad family habits, and frankly, an American culture of obesity and gigantic portions has been a challenge. While I have not even had the desire to follow any of my 300lbs habits, trying to gauge what is appropriate both currently and as a trajectory has been unclear - and I guess its supposed to be. Thanks again! @njlimmer Glad to not be alone in the confusion! @LaoDaBeirut Ordered - appreciate the tip! @BigSue Thanks for the meringue tip. Definitely going to try. Nervous about protein bars - I really like the thinkthin lemon bars, but at 230 calories (though well balanced, making that a habit would be 1/2 lbs per week - basically my entire weight loss. Love a 25 calorie option! Great tip!

WLS is a "hard way" of losing weight. The notion that it's "the easy way out" or a "magic wand" is pure ignorance. WLS is just a tool and it's still a life-long adjustment to a healthier way of eating, and it still includes exercise and calorie counting. Your husband (along with many others in society!) needs to understand this. If he's resistant to understanding that, then there's other stuff at play behind his anti-WLS stance. I would also question why "the hard way" is so essential? Why is that so important, versus choosing an alternative route that gets results? Why is the journey being a difficult one so essential here? Again, the surgery option is plenty difficult, but just trying to unpack the logic behind his stance. My partner was initially unhappy with my choice, until I finally broke down and really let him know how utterly miserable I was in my morbidly obese body. I had tried "the hard way" all my life and failed. He very quickly changed his stance and got on board, and has been a great support since. And he can see the change in me not just physically but mentally. I am happy again. I have my sex-drive back. I want to go out again. It's not just weight loss. Your husband needs to know that. And surely he wants that for you? If not... again, there's other stuff going on in that case. I'm sorry you're having a hard time with him over this. It's stressful enough without added emotional strain. I hope he can open his eyes and get on board for your health and happiness.

Yes it's hard but you can't look at it like another diet. It truly is a whole new way of life. If you don't treat it that way then the chance of success is minimal. I've been successful with the sleeve, kept most of the weight off for 6+ years, but have to convert to bypass due to severe GERD and associated damage to my esophagus. I'm hoping for some additional weight loss (30 pounds would be amazing!!). Sent from my Z6201V using BariatricPal mobile app

This topic is a large part of why my first surgery wasn't more successful. I was quite the party guy, hanging out with friends every weekend who drank lots of beer and ate snacks while shooting the breeze at the lake. Unfortunately six months or so after the sleeve I was able to train myself how to drink beer again, and also learned that most snack foods are "slider" foods. This stalled my weight loss at about 60% of my goal. The other thing I learned was that the restriction lessened over time. By five years out I was able to eat almost a regular plate of food. There was still restriction on solid protein (I could only eat about 4 oz of steak) but I could eventually add reasonable side dishes to it. I'd say before surgery I would eat a very large portion, while after I was able to eat a much smaller version of a normal plate of food. While most folks Thanksgiving plates were heaping masses of food, mine was a few ounces of turkey and an assortment of maybe an ounce of each item I wanted to try. I just did a revision to gastric bypass due to hiatal hernia and GERD, but i am looking at this as a second chance to get it right. Six years out from my first surgery my lifestyle has changed enough that not drinking, or only having an occasional glass of wine or cocktail, now is fine with me. Success with weight loss surgery truly does require lifestyle change. The sleeve or pouch is a tool. Its maximum benefits are the first year after surgery. It continues to be a tool after but without a change in lifestyle the benefits won't last forever.

Not sarcasm. Dry wit. I had a blast when I was preparing for my marathons way back when. I take more pride in the marathons than I do the weight loss. One of my fondest memories is running across the Golden Gate Bridge. Enjoy and good luck, Tek

Hey! I know I've been posting a lot but I'm curious, I'm 5 days post op. The pain has subsided a lot but I still need to wear my binder. I'm experiencing such low levels of energy and stamina I can't even enjoy my weight loss. Pre op I was training for a half marathon and able to walk and run without being short of breath. When I walk my legs give out and my chest pulsates. Is this normal? My family says it's because I'm not eating. Ive walked inbetween 8000 and 10000 steps a day since surgery 5 days ago. I have all my protein and most all my hydration every day. I'm nervous it's going to be like this for a month and I'm so unhappy with the lack of energy. Has anyone experienced this or can give advice? Sent from my SM-G975U using BariatricPal mobile app

Hello everyone, I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2020 and was wondering if WLs has truly change it for you better or worse. Part of the reason I am doing this surgery is to hopefully get rid of the weight that is impossible to lose due to PCOS but also because I heard it "cures" it. What are you're thoughts or experiences?

I had a revision due to gerd and during the liquid and puree phase, I did not feel any restriction. Once I entered solid foods, I absolutely did and still do. I can not eat more than 2 ounces of protein at a time and a little veggies/fruit, and it keeps me full for about 3-4 hours. I am a little over 6 months. I'm close to goal and the weight loss has been steady. It is a definite learning curve though. My "I'm satisfied" flag does not come up till 30 to 40 min later so I've learned to always measure my food beforehand to avoid anything uncomfortable later and to chew a lot.

Yay to your 50 lbs weight loss! What a great accomplishment! Weight loss varies between people and from month to month. The moral: Run your race. I have found that rejoicing with those who rejoice does wonders for my own soul and mental game. Best of luck!

Hey there! You are not alone! I had surgery at the end of June and am down 59 lbs (which is great!) but having lots of stalls and losing very, very slowly. I am sticking to the plan, keeping calories no more than 1200 a day and exercising 30-60 minutes a day. I feel like I should be making more progress. Sigh.. I am just keeping to the plan and hoping it'll come off eventually. Congratulations on your 50lb loss!

Granted I was given the 150 minutes a week to work out. sometimes I would do it all in one sitting and sometimes I would do it scattered throughout the week just kind of depended on the craziness of it all. Tbh, the part that baffles me the most is "intentionally working out". What does that mean? " you are active for the sake of fitness not because it is required but you want to for your health." Why else do it? lol Idk, I'm not active all the time and I am looking into a neurologist for spinal concerns before continuing my weight loss goals but I feel like all that I have done and on my own is a good sign I want this. I have been cleared from everything but psych by april may ish of last yr. I thought for sure I would have my surgery by the fall. My life coach even said with how fast you are making changes and showing improvement I would say by christmas you will be all good to go . then the Mental health stuff got in the way so I agreed to go through with it for less stress on myself and everyone else but also it was time to heal. now its months later and still waiting. As far as cost I have state insurance since most jobs I get doesn't seem to give benefits now days so they are paying it 100%. So needless to say I think reaching out to my amazing life coach and my nursing team may be the best way to go. Wish me luck you guys. Thank you so much for supporting me on this journey it has meant a lot. You have no idea how many eye rolls I get trying to prep people for what is to come. I love you guys so much. I look forward to going on this journey with you.

Hi Lisa! I am about the same time out until my surgery. I will be getting a revision surgery from the lap band to the RNY bypass. Sounds like you are off to a good start and already losing weight! I am trying to do WW right now, but the weight is barely moving. I would be happy to be your weight loss friend during this journey. I just bought a helpful book on Amazon called “The Big Book on Gastric Bypass” By Alex Brecher. Have you started your classes yet?

For me I was a little worried about breaking up with my favorite foods and I needed to test the waters to see if I was going to be able to tolerate them. I tried tiny bits of pizza, pasta, chocolate, etc., once it was medically safe, but early out. Some may say this is counter productive during the weight loss phase but for me I just needed to know that I would be able to have them again someday and I ate such small amounts that the calorie difference wasn’t really that bad. Anyways, I had been able to stay away from those things until 11 month out. But then I had a death in the family during which I turned to food again. I have been looking for a bariatric therapist in my area with no luck but if you have one in your area you may consider seeing them to uncover why you are craving McDonald’s right now. If it is like many of us and you have a form of disordered eating, unpacking that in therapy sooner than later will be your best bet to set yourself up to be successful.

On the weight loss slowing, everyone here has already said that's totally normal. But since I'm a total nerd and tracked my weight loss, I can tell you exactly how mine slowed down. I've lost a total of 70 lbs over 23 months. Month 1: 3.5 lbs a week, reached -22 lbs Months 2-4: ~1.5-2 lbs a week, reached -41 lbs Months 5-12: 0.5-1 lbs a week, reached -63 lbs and passed my original goal weight at 11 months out Months 13-20: 0.2 lbs a week, currently at -70 lbs, 12 under my original goal Does this mean that you pretty much never dieted before you got surgery? Or are you comparing now to the first 6 months after surgery, where you didn't care about food much simply because you weren't hungry? After reading these boards for a few years, it seems that the people who have long term success do have to pay some attention to their diet to maintain their weight loss. But that takes a lot of different forms according to the specific issues and goals of different people. You won't necessarily have to pay as much attention to it in the long term as you do right now. Right now you're learning what works for you; later it will become habit. Especially if what you said above means that you never dieted much before - in this case you would be learning about what works for you for the first time. But for everyone, after bariatric surgery, you have to learn what your "new normal" is. Personally, my long term goal has been to maintain without having to calorie count. Before surgery, I was pre-diabetic and low carb was the only thing that ever helped me lose weight. After surgery, carbs are still an issue for me, though much, much less of an issue than before. Rather than limiting/counting carbs every day, I've found that having a 4-5 day period of low-carb every 3-4 weeks keeps my carb cravings in check. I still start my day with a protein powder latte and make sure that I have protein with every meal. Veggies help keep me full. If I feel hungry, I eat a snack, but I usually start with a piece of cheese or a few frozen meatballs (I love these things) before I have anything more junky. I eat sweets some days, but not all. I use things like sugar free ice cream or low sugar yogurt for a bit of a treat on other days.

So, I'm a little worried about the whole saggy skin thing. I had the lap band done and lost about 70 lbs in 5 months. I didn't really have any saggy skin, just a little "pouch" in my stomach area. But my arms and legs were fine. Fast forward to now, I had to have it removed for medical reasons and I'm nervous for the weight loss after my bypass. I'm older now and have alot more health problems that have prevented me from being active. I was looking at getting those arms sleeve wraps to see if they might help during weight loss. And maybe one of those things that look like Spanx. Has anyone tried any of these? What has worked for you on helping with saggy skin?

I visited the sleep center today and was given results by the NP. I have had three previous studies. The first one I only slept 16 minutes out of eight hours. The second study was better but I could not tolerate C -PAP so they stopped that study and had me come back in for Bi-PAP. I sure do hope this does not set my surgery date back. Has anyone had any experience with this? Thank you and be blessed.

Yeah, sadly, those heady days of a high rate of weight loss don’t last. You can always depend on your weight loss slowing the closer you are to goal. You’re eating more (which is a normal progression) & getting closer to the number of calories your body needs to maintain your weight. As @catwoman7 said how much food you eat depends on the food you’re eating. A good place to begin is to look at the recommended portion sizes of different foods - start with google & quiz your dietician on what is a serve of beef, of chicken of vegetables, etc. You’re probably getting to close to a recommended serving size now. The problems only start to arise if you’re eating more than that & the only thing that will stop you eating larger portions sizes is you. Plus check the calories of what you’re eating & the nutritional content if you’re not still doing this. 1500 calories is 1500 calories regardless of whether it’s from nutritionally dense food or from cake, sodas, chips, pizza, etc. I eat more often & eat more food in a day now than I did when I was obese. It’s just more nutritionally dense food & my my metabolism is working better. As to what’s bad: carbs, fats or sugar? I think this is a personal thing. You know your medical status which would influence whether you should keep your fat intake low or not. You know your weaknesses - sugar, carbs. I think we should work out a lot of our eating plans based on these things about ourselves. There are recommended daily allowances for fats, sugar & carbs too. Generally, I’m a bit of a balanced diet person. Though I don’t eat a lot of carbs & only multi or whole grains - I used to eat a lot of bread, pasta & rice. I also avoid a lot of sugar, artificial sweeteners & sugar substitutes because I think sugar is the real devil. I get my sweet from fruit. I don’t have dessert as such but have eaten chia pudding (flavoured with vanilla extract). I’ll have a protein bar after dinner if my protein is a little low for the day or will have fruit. How I feel real hunger is very different. I feel restless & I don’t crave a specific food or type (salt, sweet, carb) of food. If my ‘hunger’ is craving something specific it’s head hunger & not real. If there’s an emotional component to the ‘hunger’ (like hangry) it’s not real hunger. Part of the ‘fun’ of maintenance is working out your calorie & nutritional needs. It took me a while to work out what mine was & to be physically able to eat that much food. But you have to find a balance too. If you have to have such a restricted diet to maintain that it compromises you enjoying your life, it’s doomed to fail. It’s about sustainability. If that means you end of weighing a little more than you thought you wanted to be, that’s ok. If you enjoy your latte every day enjoy it. If it worries you try a smaller serve or reduce it to one a day or three cups every two days. There’s always work arounds or substitutes you can make like zucchini noodles instead of spaghetti but still enjoy what you’re eating & not feel like you’re missing out. The truth about exercising is that it will only contribute to 10-20% of any weight you want to lose. Want to lose 10lbs? Exercising will only contribute to you losing 1 or 2 lbs. Plus if you increase your exercising, your hunger will increase. Unfortunately the work doesn’t the end. All the best.

In the early days of the surgery the scale has no relation to your body's reality. My advice - ignore it for a bit. While you are on liquids and basically minimal calories, you are losing weight. Nothing more you can do. For reasons I cant explain (and it seems no one else really can either) weight loss is not linear at all. Days will pass where the scale doesnt move - then one day three pounds disappear. We all go through the same anxiety from time to time (I am in the midst of another stall now). Other than having this group tell you its all going to be alright, there is nothing to do but be patient, and know that its just a matter of time. Wishing you good luck!