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@@Leesa926 - I'm all in favor of anyone getting off of caffeine, nicotine, alcohol etc. I'm also in favor of harm avoidance. Tobacco in the forms of smoking or chewing are the most dangerous. Hands down. Snuss, lowers risk. Vaping, no known problems. I hate to tell you this, but it all depends on your surgeon and provider. I didn't hide my vaping in Mexico. They didn't object. And it didn't derail my progress, nor healing. Now the Plural of antidotes is NOT evidence. What worked for me does NOT EVER MEAN it is acceptable to everyone nor every surgery center. I am only sharing my own experience. Please understand that. PLEASE.
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My holy grail product for DRY skin!
BLERDgirl replied to Elode's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
Agreed, but I would caution using any products that contain alcohol anywhere near my face or on products that go near your face. Alcohol is *really* bad for the skin. When I wash my brushes I am almost fanatical about rinsing them off since some brush cleaners can contain alcohol. As for break outs, the last one I had was maybe 3 years ago when I tried argon oil. -
My holy grail product for DRY skin!
OutsideMatchInside replied to Elode's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I had one for years at the recommendation of my former esthetician and because I loved what my Sonicare has done for my teeth. I thought it was great, except my skin kept breaking out. I replaced the bush heads every 45 days (germ freak) and cleaned them daily with alcohol. They are rough on your face and I tried every single brush they made, including the sensitive skin one. My skin wasn't getting better. Clarisonic pays for a lot of product placement (most brands do), and they are very aggressive with it. It is beneficial to Sephora, and Ulta to push the Clarisonic with the brush costs, it is beneficial to them. I switched to the Foreo over a year ago. My skin improved immediately. It is soft and gentle on the face, more hygienic and no brushes to replace. A Foreo will pay for itself in the first year just off what Clarisonic brushes cost in a year. The only thing I use my Clarisonic for is exfoliation my elbows and knees, since I couldn't sell it on eBay. -
I think it also depends on what you mean by "dessert". I enjoy sugar-free Jello and sugar-free pudding, and almost every night I have a cup of sugar-free cocoa (with a scoop of chocolate Protein powder in it, very yummy). I make my own low-carb whipped cream by whipping heavy cream with splenda and vanilla extract. I have even found out you can make low-carb ice cream (although I haven't tried it myself). If you are talking about sugar-free cakes or similar, I think you need to be careful. As @@Djmohr says, if you are far enough out you can probably handle it, but you may not want to. My wife enjoys a sugar-free blueberry loaf, but if you look at the nutrition information on it, it is still loaded with fat and carbs (and sugar alcohols). sugar free definitely doesn't mean low-calorie. If you are talking about sugar-free candies, that's a good question. Russell Stover makes a whole line of sugar-free candies (not low-calorie, just sugar free), like mint patties and chocolate-covered peanut brittle. I have often wondered if I might try one of those, but I haven't yet. I'll probably wait until I am in maintenance before I try those.
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BellaBloom, you ask "Why am I still here?" You're the one who has the answer. You're the one who has to do the work. Pen and paper, two columns: What makes this relationship worthwhile? What makes it not worthwhile? Sit down, keep your entries very brief and specific (e.g., his breath stinks; I can't understand slurred speech; he falls over, et al.). When you run out of things to write, put the pad down and pick it up any time later as new things come to mind. In the end, see which column is longer. You begin by implying that you've been here before, but not with an alcoholic. Here's something I discovered. If you care to roll it around in your mind, you may find that it has meaning for you, too: I don't believe in the practice of human sacrifice, especially if I'm the one to be sacrificed. You say you like his company. An alcoholic is not company. The non-alcoholic in the pair finds that she either (a) drinks more than she ordinarily does or would for lack of someone to talk to and for a false sense of company, or doesn't drink in order to be caretaker/chauffeur to the drinker. Neither makes for a fun evening. I know this because, long ago, I had a quasi-relationship of the type. A man who worked in another city for my company came in every few weeks for a few days. I'd see him once during each trip, which was fine, but the time together was crummy. It took me a while to figure it out. [sorry about the yellow face. It should be lower case "b" in parentheses, but it automatically turns into the yellow blob. So does "b)."] You like his company, yet he's boring and shows no interest in you? Ask yourself how that works. At the same time he shows no interest, he professes love and desire. For him this relationship is about sex. Stay there if it's what you want, but if so, be aware that you can't complain. If convenient sex isn't what you want, leave. If you have a history of sticking with dead-end guys, therapy. Above all, SOMETIMES ALONE IS BETTER. Laurie
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My holy grail product for DRY skin!
Inner Surfer Girl replied to Elode's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I have some of this (but not in the pump), but have mostly been using Palmer's Cocoa Oil and Cocoa Butter. One of my doctors to me to never get a lotion or moisturizer in a pump because they add drying ingredients (alcohol) that makes the lotion go through the pump. It is good advise. -
@@FinallyFit50s - good list, plus guys near your age understand gravity wins, so relax, you look great and you are healthy. I'm not kidding that this is a number's game. It's not personal. The search means you have to almost ruthlessly cut lose people who don't match your criteria. I don't mean careless hurt people, I mean you have to stay focused on what's important to you so you are not distracted by the enabling alcoholic who worms his way into your life because you felt sorry for him (See http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/352466-they-seemed-sanedating-horror-stories/). Its a process, it can be fun if you let it. It can be rewarding if you are so blessed. But I am always humbled by the reality that you have to be open for the blessings that fall into your lap unexpectedly. Somehow the universe seems to reward our efforts in unexpected ways.
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Weight Loss Surgery and Self Harm
jess9395 replied to billw0917's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
A report in a scientifically based press source lists the following as areas for follow up studies to look at: "Previously suggested reasons for the association between bariatric surgery and the subsequent risk of self-harm include: permanent changes in body image, diet-related stress and unmet expectations of weight loss, which could increase mental health problems, leading to behaviors such as binge eating, substance misuse and self-harm behaviors. Changes in metabolism of alcohol could play a role, as well as changes in neurohormonal levels, which could lead to depression, addiction and suicide." -
What is it like?.........
zackly replied to rockstar33's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
i'm a week short of two months post op and am struggling with the same issues that you are. So much of what made my life pleasurable pre-op was related to cooking, eating and socializing with alcohol & food. I no longer want to go out to restaurants with friends because I'm full after a few forkfuls. I still cook daily as I always have because my wife should not be punished because I had WL surgery. I can't say I'm happy with my new relationship with food. It has left a huge void in my life and I hope I can` find something to replace it. What that might be, I am clueless.The good news is my health has improved significantly. My diabetes is now under good control with 1/4 of the insulin I used to take, and my blood pressure (with meds) is a very good 130/60. I don't ache all over and my stamina has improved. Like James Marusek said, "Life is full of trade-offs." I'm 65 y/o and I got this surgery to save my life. I did not want to be the fat, old blind guy with no feet. If I was younger I would try anything to avoid it. I was very active (athletic) when I was younger and was able to stay height/weight proportionate through my exercise. Everybody is different but I would get this surgery only as a last resort after you can honestly look yourself in the mirror and say you've tried everything. -
I HATE protein shakes
BostonStrong617 replied to dannieeliza's topic in Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums
After having to drink them so often after the surgery I HATED protein shakes too! I had my favorite brand and flavor and still couldn't do it. I was drinking Glucerna, but ironically the sugar alcohol made me dump...so I had to get protein through yogurts, puddings (sugar free), milk and tuna. it was tough, but it does get better. Hang in there! -
All of a sudden...everyone is *#%* expert!
kvoneye replied to ImBringingLisaBack RNY's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I got that from my coworkers and in the beginning they all said they'd support me. One coworker even tempted me with chocolate. I asked her if I was an alcoholic would she tempt me with booze. Same concept in my book. Another coworker told me since I'm losing weight for surgery why spend all that money when "you can do it on your own" my thought was, hello dumbass, if I could do it on my own,why am I not doing it already. SMH. I have yet to tell my dad or my twin sister who by the way if half my size or smaller. Some days I can't win to lose. Some people are just dumb. Keep your head up. -
Good to hear that you're heading in the right direction, relationship wise. Many, many years ago I fell hard for a guy who could of been twins with your Mr. Alcoholic loser. I moved on, and while it was hard, I eventually met my husband and have never had to think twice about his choices, actions or reliability. I can't say that about my ex ! I guarantee you my ex is probably dead, spent time in jail or lives a rocky, difficult life. I dont wish the man bad karma at all, but strong feelings cant hold an unstable, rocky , unhappy "relationship" together. Im glad you got out too, before it was too late. Good luck to you !!
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I'm so disappointed in myself!
KarenLoh replied to Katsitsyahawe's topic in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums
I am now two months post-op and it has been quite a learning experience dealing with my binge eating disorder. I have found a few things to be true: Drinking alcohol is not good for my eating. It lowers my inhibitions and I'm more likely to go get food I don't need. I still eat foods I don't need but I can't eat very much of them so it's an improvement. Still, it slows my weight loss and so I try very hard to keep those things to a minimum. I will always have an eating disorder and the surgery did not "cure" my desire for food. I am doing well (48 pounds down so far) but every day is a challenge to eat on plan (healthy, Protein, fiber). I'm so happy I did this surgery. It is nice to have a full feeling after just 5-6 ounces of food. I love food but I'm learning to be happy with just a taste or two and then move on to some other thing that brings me joy. Don't beat yourself up. You will have many opportunities to do well as you go along. -
Risk of Suicide Attempts after WLS article
gowalking posted a topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
Here's the link to the article below. Just curious what you guys think. I think that there are lots of reasons why someone would want to harm themselves and there isn't specific data as to why...just that there's a possible correlation. My take on this is that food and overeating for many of us is a symptom. It's our drug of choice rather than alcohol or heroin. But just like someone in treatment goes through psychological help, so should some folks who have food issues as well. Obviously not everyone...but enough of us. I was banded in January of 2013 and a year and 100 lbs. later, found myself so very unhappy that I went into therapy. Now, I had other issues, but it started with the weight and still involves how my weight is and will always be, a huge part of my life. I feel like I have to be vigilant like anyone else dealing with an addiction. http://www.medpagetoday.com/PrimaryCare/Obesity/54035 -
You sound like you get your worth in life by helping others. You are probably the go to girl for everybody. Its good in life to enjoy being needed and lending a helping hand, but once you have children that addiction of being there for people has to go. If it wrre me I would start breaking up with him slowly. Weining myself away little by little. Start to consider other options and dont feel obligated to stay because of his professions of love for you. Sometimes people who have battled with weight tend to have the do unto others attitude about everything because we have been treated so badly in life. That does not apply in all situations. GOD gave you a heart and a Brain. Drug/Alcohol use is dangerous around kids because it impairs the ability of the user to make rational decisions and after only 5 months you dont know him well enough to know what he would do if he looses it one day.
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I've posted something similar to what I'm about to write elsewhere on here, but I'll keep posting it when I see one of these posts come up: I loved smoking. I started when I was 15 and smoked through the next couple of decades without quitting for any real length of time. I enjoyed it, and I was pretty pissed at the idea of quitting for this surgery. I only smoked around 6-8 cigs a day, and technically was a light smoker... but after so many years, even light smokers experience issues with tiny capillaries dying off, cold fingers and toes and weird nerve issues, wheezing and coughing and are more prone to colds and flu and all the other horrible things that come with smoking ~any~ cigarettes. So I quit. Here is what I realized: I'm having this surgery to make my life better, to be healthy, to live longer and really enjoy the time I have left on this planet. Smoking is in direct opposition to all of those goals. Smoking - and I count vaping in there too since the early results on vaping are not looking good for long term health - is one of the few things that is guaranteed to do major harm to your body and kill you in the end if you use the product as intended. Think about that for a minute. There is no reason to smoke. It is bad for you, it hurts your lungs, your circulation and hampers healing. Smoking before or after having major surgery is beyond stupid (I'm saying this as part of my own self talk, not calling you specifically stupid). The ONLY reason any one smokes is because it is addictive. If you smoke or vape - you are an addict, same as an alcoholic or a drug user. Quitting is the only smart, rational option ESPECIALLY before having a serious, life altering surgery like a sleeve or bypass. I miss it almost every single day, and I just celebrated (yesterday!) my one year quit anniversary. I tell myself that I can always smoke again someday, just not right now... and hope that I can keep telling myself "maybe tomorrow" for the rest of my life. But I am damned proud I took my life back and no longer depend on those evil things, even if I still miss them. It's part of being an addict. I know what I am, and admit I'm probably always going to have that struggle, but I'll be damned if they'll ever control my life that way again. You are doing this to improve your life, so take that step further and really commit to giving your body the best possible chance, and quit smoking as well. You deserve to be the best you that you can be, and smoking should not be a part of that.
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May I also tactfully suggest you don't sleep with a man until, and unless, he has shown you his true nature and really committed to you. That might mean waiting until remarriage (my preference) or at least waiting until things are much more committed. Why would you give an intimate part of yourself to someone that you didn't want around your children? I may be old-fashioned now, but looking back to my teen/20's years I was desperate for someone to love me (child of an alcoholic father and distant mom) and gave myself away (body and soul) to several undeserving men (boys!), including my soon-to-be-ex husband. My 14 yo dd came home from school the other day with a link to a TED talk about relationships they were supposed to watch for health class. I think it's an excellent talk and recommend it for anyone in the dating games https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jodhovumkHQ I finally watched this video. What great advise. I wish I could have heard this 30 plus years ago (and payed attention). It could have saved many years of heartache.
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Oct 21st sleevers..
newlifenewsong replied to alejcerra's topic in PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A
I had my pre-op appointment on Wednesday and I 'only' have to do the pre-op diet for 10 days: 3 shakes a day (Vanilla Bariatric Advantage) that I can mix with Water, almond milk, or low-fat milk; 2 plain non-fat yoghurts of no more than 100 calories each, and sugar-free jell-o or ice lollies to snack on if I feel like it. I'll switch to Clear liquids only 48 hours before the surgery, have 2tbsp of milk of magnesia the day before, and nothing to eat or drink from midnight on the 20th until the 22nd by the sounds of it: my surgery is scheduled for the afternoon of the 21st. The advice I got was no caffeine or alcohol at least 24 hours before, but I already cut both out earlier this week. I'm also avoiding carbonated drinks (even though I could have anything sugar-free if I felt like it), to get used to the post-op restriction. So far (1 day!!), so good but I did notice that every other ad on TV seems to be for food -
I'm willing to bet most on this web site have had similar experiences to yours, I know I have. Going through this weight loss journey seems to be a series of realizations including ones relationship with food. Boredom, anxiety, are familiar reasons to self soothe with food. My own realization was that I often medicated uncomfortable emotions with food and yes, alcohol. I had to find other ways to occupy myself and acknowledge my dependence on food and alcohol. My ha is and dependence were unhealthy for me and causing detrimental effects on my health. It's a good thing when you find healthier replacements. I had to focus on how was I going to prepare for life after surgery and improve how I coped with my emotions by talking about them or dealing with them. This is a great forum for that!
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Sounds like when he's telling you how sexy and fabulous you are, that feels really amazing and maybe, just maybe its been awhile since you've had someone do that? I don't know... I don't know you, but when we have such conflicted emotions it's generally not really about what's going on right in front of us. It's about something deeper. You, for instance can plainly tell us that he's boring, narcissistic, an alcoholic, and he's injured you twice now to the point that you've decided to reach out here on this site. I'm so glad you did... But even though you have the evidence right in front of your eyes, you feel conflicted... That's the "deeper" part... and that part isn't about him. It's about you. Are you worried you won't find anyone else who will tell you how sexy and fabulous you are? Is it that you feel like you've really put your heart and soul into this guy for 5 long months now so don't want to give up? Where did that lesson come from, that you should stay despite it not being positive? See where I'm going... look into yourself. He has shown you who he is. When people show you who they are, believe them. Now, go find who you are. I'm pretty sure you're going to like who you find. And.. there will be a gazillion other guys out there who will tell you so too.
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@@flokismom - Just be sure to use the sugar free syrups. There is sugar alcohol in them which bothers some people, but a little goes a LONG way.
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I was in an abusive relationship with an addict(drugs/alcohol) for many years until I had a loaded gun to my head and woke up for my kids. I got out of that relationship and found the man of my dreams. We had our issues but he's loving and kind and I was 300+ pounds and he still loved me for me. We're going on 10 years next week and I'm so glad I walked away from that mess I was with before. There is a better man for you. Don't sell yourself short.
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We're almost twins! I was 245 at surgery and am at 178 today. No exercise. I am discouraged and mad at myself for not taking full advantage of the honeymoon phase, which I fear is over. I've let some bad habits creep back in - sugar, alcohol, carbs. Still losing but only 1-2 lbs per month. I'm recommitting this week...getting rid of the bad stuff and trying to get to goal once and for all!Well, it looks like you and I are going to have to encourage each other!! Where do you live? I'm in Iowa Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk
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We're almost twins! I was 245 at surgery and am at 178 today. No exercise. I am discouraged and mad at myself for not taking full advantage of the honeymoon phase, which I fear is over. I've let some bad habits creep back in - sugar, alcohol, carbs. Still losing but only 1-2 lbs per month. I'm recommitting this week...getting rid of the bad stuff and trying to get to goal once and for all!
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What you're feeling is completely normal at your phase. Please believe me, it gets better as your progress to eating more normal food. Try not to isolate yourself! It's super hard at first to see everyone enjoying food and alcohol around you, but as you progress to different foods, it will get easier. I think most of us felt the way you do at first, but it gets better! Hang in there! Why do you feel you're disappointing your husband?
