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In the short 4 days since my WLS, I've had no desire to share my news other than with immediate family. Everyone has their own issues, ie, being in therapy, alcohol/drug/food dependencies etc. that they don't share. I've basically told a few folks that I had hernia surgery. Similar pain and recovery time.

So the family has been bugging me about my alcohol consumption since Covid started. Full disclosure, prior to the new year, I was drinking as least 2 (sometimes 3, on rare occasions 4) drinks A DAY. Either an espresso martini or red wine. So to get them off my back, and prove to myself I could do it, I agreed to cut down to no more than one one a day for a month. I thought this would be a piece of cake, but lol and behold, I ended up non-compliant the first 2 days. Mostly because I “forget” that I am on a mission. So on day 3, I put a sticky note on the vodka bottle when I have a drink to remind me I already had a drink that day….and I tell Mr. so he can remind me at dinner if I absently reach for the wine. Since doing this the past 3 days, it’s been working. When I quit smoking (again) last year (I had quit for 10+ years, went on a vacay in 2019 where I accepted an offered cigarette, and just like that, I was smoking again). And my quitting attempts last spring was also thwarted by me “forgetting “ that I was trying to quit. So I tossed all my lighters, got rid of my outdoor ashtrays and told EVERYONE I was trying to quit, and asked to remind me if I forget , but not to enforce me (cuz I know that will just piss me off), as I want to make the decisions myself. I’ve mostly stopped since about April 2021, but I admit I’ve had maybe 10-15 in the past 9-ish months….which is a heck of a lot better than 10-15 A DAY. Final examples: I log everything I eat. Having a running total of my calories, has a bit of influence on my food choices at the end of the day. I weigh myself every day…so I am aware if my weight starts to move from its happy place. Just a couple other “reminders” for me to keep myself in check. This approach may not work for everyone, but I seem to have moderate success with it. Anyway…this was my long winded attempt to suggest you try to find what it is that works for you and what doesn’t (either on your own or with the help of a therapist), and make efforts to implement this knowledge to achieve your goal(s). You may not be perfect, and that’s ok, small changes for the better are better than non at all. Good Luck! ❤️

It is usually recommended to abstain for the first 6 months to a year. There are several reasons. 1. Your liver is likely not the healthiest yet since obese people tend to have fatty livers. Then, as we are losing weight quickly, the liver has a bigger job to do as well. When we drink, our blood alcohol levels get quite a bit higher than non-bariatric folk after drinking the same amount. Higher blood alcohol levels means more work for the already-taxed liver. 2. Addiction transfer is a real thing. People with food addictions need to be extra cautious about this one. Those of us with addictive personalities would do best to not ever start drinking postop. 3. Since we can't eat much, it's hard to not drink on an empty stomach. Which means more drunk faster, and possibility of passing out, injury, and accident goes up. Also hypoglycemia. 4. Alcohol may irritate the stomach, and in Bypass patients it has been shown to cause ulcers. 5. Most of the alcohol-related posts made here are people asking about drinking, followed up by people having had a problem after drinking. One or two passed out cold (after a single serving), several have addiction transfers, me personally.. I had a single glass of wine after 6 months, and almost couldn't walk. (I hadn't done the research at that point to know to stop after 1/2 the glass.. oops.) If you still decide to indulge, drink only half a drink after a good meal, and have a designated driver.

My heart goes out to you. Please find a new better counselor that'll help you and keep regular two week appointments or something to stay in check. Check with your insurance plan to see if they cover addiction recovery programs. I suffer from Clinical Depression and Anxiety Disorder, so I know about using food to mask/treat my problems and while that's not alcohol like you're talking about (I don't drink) it's a similar "addiction" and coping mechanism. I take antidepressants and participate in regular counseling.

I would agree with what everyone has said about finding a different therapist. It can take a few tries to find someone who is a good fit. Don't feel bad about switching therapists; that is something they are used to and the will not be offended. You could also try a support group for alcohol use. Many people use AA, but there are probably others if AA is not your cup of tea. Try to take it one day at a time, can you go today without a drink? If you find yourself wanting a drink, can you distract yourself with a walk or an exercise video or a hot bath or shower? Good luck!

Hi there. I am a few months out before having surgery scheduled. In my WLS program, I am required to lose 12 lbs to "prove" to them I can lose weight. I don't know why, but this enraged me. I felt humiliated and degraded. Please note that i am not referencing the pre-op liquid diet--that is for safety issues. I do understand that post-op I will be adjusting to a whole new way of life, but come on, I need my tool! I have gained and lost the same amount of weight so many times in my life. I'm a pro. I've never gotten to "goal" but I can lose weight. I am less angry now and have been successful in losing that small amount of weight, but don't treat me like a moron, Mr. Surgeon! Thanks for letting me vent (obviously still a little anger lingering...) LOL. Shan

Yeah, I'd make an alcoholic stop drinking before rehab. I'm actually dealing with an alcoholic hubby right now and MY requirement for us to have a relationship is that he stop drinking, period. And, yes, I think it's fair for our doctors to require us to show some kind of motivation by losing weight before surgery. The surgeon has only so much time available to do surgeries and he wants to see results from his hard work, just like anyone else. If we, the patients, can't control and motivate ourselves somewhat before surgery, then how does the surgeon know we're going to do so after surgery? I know my doc has a waiting list of patients who want to be sleeved by him. Now, the other side of that coin is that I think it's ridiculous to expect a long-term obese person to lose 10% of their body weight before surgery. Why do I think that? Because I lost 50 pounds the year before my surgery, then got hit with health problems that packed that 50 pounds, plus more, back onto me. I'd have never been able to lose 35 pounds (10% of 352) before surgery. I did drop 13 pounds on my pre-op liquid diet, which I think shows that I was motivated to lose weight. I see both sides of it. I just think that some surgeons require more than others, which is fine. But, that requirement has to be adjusted to the patient and the patient's health status.

Thank you all for your kind replies. bigbellykellie, you are truly an inspiration - just knowing you've made it through to the other side gives me hope. To those posters who suggest I ditch him because he doesn't love me unconditionally, I can't help asking myself whether there really is such a thing as "unconditional" love when you're dealing with two adults. He likens it to being married to a heroin addict or an alcoholic. Should he put up with any behavior on my part that adversely affects the whole family just because we took vows? And to those posters who've suggested that maybe the relationship isn't based on such strong stuff to begin with if this is all it takes to knock it down, well that's definitely something to think about... Thanks again for your thoughts and please keep them coming!

I really appreciate all of your views. I agree that she needs to take some personal responsibility in the choice she makes, the saving money should help. My therapist has suggested a nutritionist who teaches classes; I will send her to those prior to our commitment. My daughter will not go to therapy and participate. I have tried several times but she refuses to discuss anything real; she just holds it all in. She said she wants the surgery but I think anything she can do to show me she is committed would be good. The reasons I gave were hers but I understand how uncomfortable that could be. </O:p My daughter is 5'9" and 260 pounds and she will be 17 in August, found a website that said her ideal body weight for her height is 143. My husband is 6'6" and 300 pounds. He should probably be about 220, I am 5'6" and 170, and I should probably be about 130. My husband has a sister that is obese and I had an aunt however neither my husband nor I have had significant problems with our weight or any surgeries, I have recently lost about 20 pounds and it seems the smaller I get the more unhappy she is. My daughter has tried dieting and working out but has never stuck with anything long enough to get any real results. I sent her to Camp Shane when she was 8 years old but I think it was one worst things I ever did since she was so young; they made here weigh herself in front of everyone which was humiliating and I thought it lowered her self esteem instead of empowering her. I think if she had been older it would have been much better. I and my daughter are both emotional eaters. I often compare it to alcoholism, my sister is an alcoholic and she went through treatment when she was 19 and has struggled with it on and off throughout her life. They have both shown the same symptoms. I remember when my daughter was in elementary school and she took a Little Debbie snack that they had against the wall in which everyone in line had to walk by to get their lunch. I went to the school and spoke with the lunch room manager and told her I did not allow those types of food in my home and I didn’t appreciate that they were trying to fill their coffers with money from the sale of crap food. I told her it would be like having an alcoholic walk through the liquor store to get their food. I think it is appalling the way our public schools undermine parent’s efforts this way. The problem with eating is that you can’t ever stop completely and isolate yourself like you can with alcohol. I know that surgery won’t solve her problems; I just hope to make life a little easier while she is dealing with them. </O:p Of course she just brought it up today and I thought I should confer with some people who have experience with this. I will probably have to take her out of the country to have the surgery done as I don’t think that my insurance will pay for it and the cost is so much less elsewhere.<O:p

I think most of them say no alcohol to help you keep from falling back into bad habits of empty calorie consumption. I know my problem wasnt sweets or gourging myself on certain foods. it was primarily craft beer that got me to where i am.

I am being banded in January, no pre op diet required and I have a similar attitude to Trish and Ang especially with holidays around! I will be on vacation for a week until Jan 2nd where I know food and alcohol will be plentiful so I have pledged to myself that come Jan 3rd it all ends and I focus on eating well, making that change from 2 weeks before surgery.

I still love all my old favorites, but I do find myself seeking out healthy foods I never really bothered with before. I do indulge in pizza, baked goods, chocolate, deserts and alcohol on occasion but I don't really crave any of them. The biggest addiction I've developed is for mixed nuts and Peanut Butter. Gotta have a bit everyday or I start "jonesin" I wouldn't worry about your tastes changing. If you don't like pizza postop then you won't miss it. I'm actually excited about all the new foods I've discovered and prefer to eat over the chips and candy and fried junk I used to eat (and love) everyday.

@@shawneedragon it sounds as though you're at a place of real honesty about your addiction to alchol and the effect that has had on your life. That is a starting point to turn it all around. I hope you're able to find the resources you need -- whether that is therapy, a psychiatrist to help with the medication issues so you are not self-medicating, AA meetings -- whatever it takes. Know that you are worthy and deserving of all good things. You can do this. Recovery is hard work and it's something that has to be dealt with every single day, but, as they say, it's one day at a time. Here you are. That's a great first step. Good luck with all. Eating disorder is so dificult to address because, of course, one has to eat -- unlike drug addiction, smoking or alcohol. Take good care of yourself!

Prunes, prune juice, and water are a great start. Next is a stool softener which isnt a laxative and therefore less of a medication. This might sound like bad advice in terms of calories but anything that has fake sugar in it (sugar alcohols which end in -ol like sorbitol) will pull water into your colon and make you poop. I eat two or three of those diet Russell Stover chocolates and then I can easily poop...good luck!

I maintained for 3 years before finding out I would have to unfill my band completely for an abdominal surgery. That scared the whatsit's out of me, I was positive I'd pack on the weight again. Now, I'd been ticking along nicely with maintaining with a band, basically, I ate whatever, whenever, to my heart's desire. Portion control was assured, the fact that I generally like and choose healthy foods was a given, but I had plenty of sugary or high fat stuff and a glass of wine a day in there too. I decided I'd better start practicing counting and logging calories and being VERY careful in preparation for what I hoped would only be a few weeks unfilled. What do you know, the weight started falling off! I lost 10lb very quickly and easily, which when you're already at a BMI of 21, is quite a lot of weight. So yes, anytime you get back on that bike, your band is in there willing to help you. But you have to do the hard stuff - the calorie counting, the saying no to high calorie foods, cutting back on the alcohol etc. Its a pain in the behind, but nobody can eat just whatever they want and lose weight, although with a band you can pretty easily do that and maintain.

I would definitely not get the surgery now if you are feeling this way. To be honest, I had no idea how restricting the surgery would be. I thought I was going to have no cravings or hunger. Therefore, I was so excited and ready. I am 25 years old. I got the surgery on 08/17/2018. Let me just tell you, I am still dealing with food depression. I have no way to comfort myself now. I used to do it with food and alcohol after a long week of work. Now I cannot do that. Therefore, this tells myself I was not mentally prepared for the surgery. It’s too late now. I am stuck with the exhaustion and depression and boring life. I am stuck with this fear of food and fear or of gaining weight back. Still have an unhealthy relationship with food, but now it’s not eating. Ugh just terrible. I was a binge eater, though. Good luck. It is your choice. I am happy I got it because I am losing weight and feeling more confident. I hated being super fat. I felt disgusting after the fact I ate. So yes I am happy I did this, but it sucks at the same time. I think surgery is harder than actually dieting because you have no choice on how much to eat and you can’t have your cheat day because it all just hurts the little sleeve. I am just ranting now Bc I’m tired. Best of luck!!!

I was also allowed coffee as soon as I was ready to tolerate it. That was true of almost everything I eat and drink. When I was ready, I was ready. When I read others who say their surgical team says no caffeine for six months or no alcohol ever or something, I always want to ask their surgical team to justify why. If they can't, then I wouldn't put much faith in it. Good luck.

Okay, so the old feelings of guilt I used to have before surgery are overcoming me once again. Here's the background: had surgery on 1/23/12. I have been very good, all I eat is Protein, only 3 meals/day, and I measure everything. I have lost only 17 lbs and I'm finishing week 6 now. Have felt crappy the entire time---tired and dizzy, and having a hard time keeping down all the vitamens/meds.... get nausea frequently from almost anything (in the car, drinking Water too fast, vitamens...). Haven't been able to exercise yet. So yesterday I was standing for 30mins in a hot room at work and I got very dizzy and sweaty. my sugar was 60. I had to leave work. felt like crap, it was around 10am and I had had 4oz Protein shake at 7am. I got frustrated, I can't do my job and all this for only 17lbs off! Then the kicker, today I ate 5 little Cookies for lunch. 1st time I've had sugar since surgery. they all went down well, suprisingly given my nausea with everything protein. I feel so guilty, don't know why I did it, I'll probably realize why later today. But I feel like it's the beginning of falling into my bad habits, my old emotional overeating self.... it's scary to have a setback. I feel like an alcoholic who has been sober for 6 weeks and just binge drank. HELP from all my formerly fat (always fat at hear) friends!!!!!

Dumping syndrome for me comes in the form of heart palpitations, and as of last night fainting. So last night I cheated and ate a piece of candy, 3 pieces to be exact. I came up stairs laid down to watch tv. I didnt wait 30 minutes to drink, I waited like 30 seconds. flushing all the stupid sugar (candy) into my small intestine. An hour or 2 later my heart starts racing , once this subsided I got up to use the restroom, next thing I know I'm waking up on the bathroom floor with my face bouncing off the baseboard. First time fainting for me, and a lesson well learned. Oh, let me be totally honest here I also had been enjoying an alcoholic libation. ( I was not drunk, but I'm sure this alcohol combined with candy, along with not waiting to drink all combined to make a perfect storm. So yeah, I'm pretty sure I have a broken nose, my knee, hip, elbow and face are all nicely bruised. This could have been avoided had I not drank alcohol candy and paid closer attention to the rapid heart rate earlier.

I am 8 mos out and I eat everything. Popcorn and nuts. I eat beans, pasta and bread sparingly. It fills me up too quickly. I've posted before and I've received negative comments about my eating habits. But it works for me. I started at 200 and I now weigh 133...and I don't fluctuate much. I eat many times a day, but 4 or 5 bites. I don't log my food or count anything. Maybe I'm being naive or getting cocky...but I've done that my whole life and I feel free now. I can definitely eat more now. I don't think I've stretched out my stomach. I can eat very little in the morning, but as the day goes on I can eat more. I never drink alcohol, carbonated drinks, or juice. I eat chips, tacos, English muffins and peanut butter, turkey jerky, nuts, cheese, pizza, etc. Sweets aren't my thing, and if I do eat them, it's a few bites. Don't eat ice cream. I love cheeseburgers (half with one bun). A taquito. Half a piece of chicken and four bites of salad with ranch. A few fries. Sweet potato. No fruit really. I eat what I want when I want...just four or five bites. I would really have to work at it all day and make myself uncomfortable to gain weight. I don't know if this is bad advice, but it works for me. I never took PPI's. You'll do what works for you. To be honest, I will always be a food addict. My bad cravings really never went away, but I can't indulge now. If I had to eat chicken and veggies the rest of my life I'd be very unhappy. I want to eat healthy now to feel good...not just be skinny. I'm only 8 months out. I might be changing my tune if I put on weight in the years to come. ????

http://www.gotvape.com/vaporizer/alcohol-vaporizer.php Well looks like if you're gonna tie on a few and drive yourself home (dumb idea) that this is the way to go. Apparently you get the alcohols effects but the breathalizer tests can't get a reading like if you had drank the liquor. Parents out there- if you have a nebulizer and teens in the house, keep a close eye/ nose out for alcohol use in this manner!

Interesting to know that it didn't do much for you.. I figured it smelled horrible lol.. Wonder what would happen if you nebulized a strawberry daiquiri or a pina colada or even coconut flavored rum??? HMMMM LOL j/k.... Oh well.. Thanks for trying it out and letting us know!!!! There are die-hard alcoholics that will drink listerine or in a worst case scenario, rubbing alcohol, when desperate...

I' ready to be able to put some cream on them, too. I've been washing them with dial soap, and they look great (no infection) they are just really dry and itchy now. How did you get the sticky goo off your skin from the steristrips? Someone mentioned alcohol - but NO WAY! That would burn, I still have a few small scabby spots, and 1 place where I put a bandaid to keep my bra from rubbing and the band aid pulled all my skin off with it.

Hey Jennifer... I am getting banded tomorrow, but I know about steri strips...lol.. you do not want to remove them. The main thing is make sure the site is completely healed..no opening in the skin...it sounds like they are already in the process of falling off... They usually come off on thier own..10 days..You can trim the curled edges off..I wouldn't take them off because you risk seperating the newly healed skin..only if your doctor recomends..As far as the sticky stuff, once your site heals..you can use rubbing alcohol to remove it..but make sure you are healed...it would burn...lol. Hope this helps..

no u didn't screw up so dont beat yourself up if u have a 4-cc band and its almost filled it actually mite b to tight so u might want to have it checked. of course limiting alcohol is never a bad thing but u r allowed to have a drink now and then and a martini doesn't sound to bad what happened is that u mite have had something stuck and when it mixed with the alcohol boom vomit concoction lol i do hope u feel better call your Dr. and definitely stay off solids and alcohol till u have the ok from him gd luck keep me posted!!!