Search the Community

@Xx1jpt5xx alluded to this, but I want to emphasize it. I think it might help you understand your husband if you think about his weight and eating as an addiction, not a failing of willpower. There are studies that show that foods, especially highly palatable ones, trigger the same brain chemicals as illicit drugs. Food scientists know this and engineer food to be more palatable because it keeps you coming back for more. Unlike other addictions (alcohol, drugs, gambling...), you have to have food to survive so abstinence isn't an option. I think compassion and empathy will get you a lot farther with him than trying to convince and coerce. Most of us fighting against obesity already have a ton of shame and feel like failures that we can't just fix it. It sounds like he is aware there is an issue and wants to do something different. That is a positive in this. I am also glad he has a partner like you that clearly loves him and wants the best for him. Maybe look into tips for supporting people with addictions and try to translate those to this situation. It might also help if you and your husband attended an information seminar at a local bariatric center so you have more information on the process and procedures.

The great thing about erythritol as a sugar alcohol is that for MOST people, it doesn't cause the GI disturbances that malitol, xylitol and sorbitol do. The molecule that makes up erythritol is so much smaller, and very little of it can reach the colon to feed the bacteria that would cause the upset. And for the percentage that does make it- well the intestinal bacteria can't digest it. Erythritol enters the blood stream and 90% is actually excreted in the urine untouched. It has a zero glycemic index too! The warning for it is that should you consume over 50g at once you may have stomach upset/grumbling.

Had my first wine at 4 months. Had first hard liquor (vodka and whiskey) about six months out. Can't do beer at all...too much carbonation. I did manage to drink hard cider after letting it set over ice for a bit. I probably drink alcohol 3-4 times/month. I did have 2-3 cocktails everyday for 10 days straight when I was on vacation and then at a conference back in October. The 3 notable results were....1) I discovered alcohol does not affect me any differently than preop...I barely get buzzed. 2) that much alcohol gave an upset stomach (gastritis) that was fortunately fixed with 10 days of omeprazole, and 3) I gained 4 pounds that was most likely Water weight because it came off easily in a week. I know transfer addictions can happen after bariatric surgery, and I definitely used to turn to food AND alcohol for comfort. So I make it a point to NOT drink when I'm sad or upset or stressed. I consider those "trigger emotions" and make sure I do not default to the old habits during those times.

My surgeon time me to kick coffee completely before surgery (plus soda and alcohol), I haven't had any in over a month and I'm less than 3 weeks from surgery. I don't anticipate having any for a while after but I miss it. Sent from my Pixel 3 using BariatricPal mobile app

Oh goodness yes... I DID count Sugars (not sugar alcohols mind you) definitely. I liked to keep my total sugars to less than 10g per day. That's not easy to do, but I was able to do it - and it sure worked. Good luck!

For starters my name is randy im a 27yr old male from kentucky. Ive always been borderline overweight at any point in my life but i played sports all through school so that kept me a little athletic build. At my best 5'11 230lb and held records for weight lifting. Once i graduated high school i went on to quick stent at college sports and decided i was done with it and thats when the weight came. I got in a comfortable relationship, stopped working out and started drinking and eatting and blew up to 360. But with my past no one accepted i was that big even my self i still just looked like a brute. I kept that weight for prob 7 years and lately i got all the way to 391. Had a baby last sep and just found out we are expecting another. Heart disease and just poor overall health runs in my family and im always saying we cant let our kids start out like i did but how can you say you cant have a pop or cakes when dad is eatting them at an alarming rate so i decided to look into the sleeve and be a role model and to be able to be around for 50 more years not 10. So august 1st 2016 i went to the dr for the first time and they started my pre op diet. I lost 21 lbs everything went smooth and was scheduled for surgery 9/2/16 at 9am. Not going to lie a few days prior i did cheat one last time. Had some home made biscuits and gravy and cheesecake factory lol but i actually didnt even finish ethier meal. The surgery 9/2/16 I arrived at 7am at st josephs hospital in lexington, ky. Had already pre registered so just aited for them to call me back got me dressed started all my ivs and vitals and my family came back and set with me til 9 on the dot. I was getting so nervous not because of fear but because of the change for the good this would have on my life. I actually remember telling my wife i dread the catheter more than anything as ive never had one. And that i would be home the next day, be back to work and not need the pain meds. Ive had knee surgery and wrist surgery before so i figured it would be a breeze. Boy was i wrong. I woke up feeling very confused not knowing where i was and in terrible pain they finally got.me knocked back out. And kept my pain at ease the rest of the day. At approx 1pm that day i said was ready to walk and i sat my goal at one block around the nurse unit which is 300 ft. I ended up doing tha 3 more times in 24 hours. The bed was killing me so i opted for a recliner and thats when i felt regret with the ordeal. I couldnt raise my self up i felt so useless because of the pain and soreness ive always done things for my self but after a talk with my wife i snapped out of it and told my self pain is only temporary. Anyways that night the pain was managed but i dealt with alot of nausea. I never puked luckily but it was rough at times i learnt alcohol swabs under the nose help until the meds kick in. 5 am the day after surgery my urine output was great so the cathetor got pulled. 3pm the dr came in said im doing the best hes seen post op so he offered me to go home and we thought on it a while and i was back home at roughly 7pm. That night was rough laying in a flat bed and trying to get up with a pegnant wife pulling on me but i made. My 2nd day pos op i had a hot cup hot chocolate no sugar added. 8gr potein 5carbs its the best i could find but i just do one cup in the morning. I ate 1/3 cup sugar free Jello and about 4 spoon fulls of wendys chili that evening. Only down fall was i only got in roughly 26oz fluids. So starting monday i attacked with a different method. I started with my hot Fluid and meds. Ate half of a egg white. And got my 2 Protein shakes down at 30g potein each and about 4 spoons of chili again. Yesturday i got 68oz of fluid. Today as i write this at 9am day 4 post op i have started the same with my hot fluids and already finished roughly 20oz of fluid. My pain is much more tolerable today and the gas is almost all gone. And sorry if you picture it but i had my first bowel movement this morning and tht was great as well. Everything seems to be getting better each day. Im increasing my walking each day whether it be around the house, to check the mail or going out in he garage. I did order a stationary bike so i could ride it while the kids play inside or we watch tv or something so im.not.just sitting around. I will try to keep this updated so that maybe my story will inspire someone else that has just had surgery or looking to have it just as many of other stories helped me. The biggest thing i have to say about it all is pain is temporary, but the change you will go through is life changing and thats for the better for your self and the ones around you Sent from my SM-N920V using the BariatricPal App

Yes, the band takes pressure off of eating.. Once you are at the proper fill level food is just not the same. You become full very quickly. I also think it has a lot to do with what types of foods you can eat as well. I do well staying away from junk most of the time. I'm just never hungry. Alcohol is another subject. If I could just give that up!

I am having a bad day! Feeling very frustrated and like a failure. I will be 4 weeks post op tomorrow. For the past week, I keep gaining and losing the same 2 pounds. GRRR Then I took it a step further and drank alcohol last night! I only ordered one shot and sipped on it for about 2 hours. I got a little buzz from it and feel like total crap today! I keep feeling like I am never going to lose weight. I have failed at every diet I have ever tried (obviously, that is what led me to the sleeve) and I am staring to think I will fail at this too! Ugh! I hate feeling this way! Definitely one of those days I would like to stay under the covers and cry myself back to sleep! For some reason, I feel like I can't get my emotions together! Anyone else have these problems/feelings???

Sex Toy Care From Box to Bedroom to Pleasure Chest As with all things we love, we try to take care of them as best as we can... and your favorite sex toys are no exception. Learn how to show your toys the love they need, so they can love you right back... Whenever you make the decision to purchase a sex toy, you have high hopes in terms of what you expect from it as well as its ability to withstand regular use. If it's a great toy, you can rely on its performance - and when it's not, you’ll be disappointed that you wasted money and spontaneous opportunities. We’d like you to avoid any downers and get the maximum performance from your sex toys by checking out our Care Checklist. These tips in no way intend to replace the recommendations from the manufacturer – it is highly recommended you consult these before using your toy. From the Box The first thing you need to do is check for allergies to the material(s) used. There are enough toys out on the market that can accommodate just about anyone’s needs! Materials like glass, silicone and plastic give people with sensitivities excellent options to choose from. You may want to use condoms if you’re sharing your toy in order to mitigate the chances of exchanging bacteria or fluids with your sexual partner; if you have a latex sensitivity you can obtain condoms made from polyurethane. The second thing to do is give it a good wash. Make sure you follow the manufacturer’s recommendations before using your toy for the first time. Follow the steps to sanitize and/or pre-treat your toy. As well, try to make a habit of always following up with another wash right after using it to avoid bacteria building up. As you will want to avoid getting Water into the internal electronic compartments, wrap a towel around that part of it to protect it from getting wet. Next, inspect your toy before you use it! When all you want to do is rip into the box and jump on it, you need to put on the brakes and do the following things: check for discoloration, tears or damage to any of the components; inspect the battery pack for leaks or corrosion; and make sure wires have proper connections with the main body of the toy and check to see whether the unit operates properly when you put in batteries e.g. does it turn on, does it have a range of vibe, etc. That way, if there is a problem, you might have a hope of returning it. To the Bedroom When you're introducing sex toys into your repertoire, make sure that you use the right batteries. Sex toys are made up of small parts and those parts can burn out easily; running your toys for extended periods of time can contribute to their demise. An overheating toy could be a real mood spoiler. It is a good idea to use the 'no name' brand batteries with your toys. Often the brand name batteries deliver power that is beyond your toy’s capacity and can eventually short them out. Try to avoid toys that require expensive hard-to-find "button" type batteries. The upside is that no-name 'AA' & 'AAA' batteries are cheap... picking up a few packages at the dollar store is convenient, affordable and you’ll always have fresh batteries on hand. You can bypass the battery business by investing in a rechargeable toy. That way, you can have less impact on the environment and more in your bedroom. Use the right lube to maximize performance. Toys and lube go hand in hand. Even though you might produce a lot of your own natural lubricant, have a bottle of lube on hand for more comfortable extended sessions. Water-based lube is good to have around for practically every type of toy. It's got a pleasant consistency and rinses easily, but the downside is that it dries out rather quickly. Try silicone-based lube for longer staying power but NEVER use it with either nu-skin or silicone toys!! Waterproofing is another point to consider. Make sure to check our featured reviews as well as the manufacturer’s instructions to see what level of water exposure your toy is capable of handling. Always check that all the components are closed properly. To Your Pleasure Chest Proper Cleaning and Storage is crucial to proper sex toy care. To improve your toy’s lifespan, keep it in a cool, dark and enclosed place away from pets and children. Why not get a fun box to store them in? It'll be much more appealing and you'll take pride in your wonderful collection. Remove your batteries before you start washing them and wash your toy before and after every use. Never store batteries in your toy because they might leak, rust or turn your toy on accidentally. It might not be the first thing people want to do after a pleasure session, but washing your toys after every use will elevate your desire to keep using your toy. It's simply good hygiene – special things sometimes require special care. You can usually get away with rinsing with warm water when you use water-based lubes but some types of lube require gentle soap, specialty toy cleaner or even rubbing alcohol. Follow any instructions that come with your toy. For drying, try to air-dry your toy overnight or dab with a lint-free towel. The key here is to not throw it into the closet while it’s still damp! Voila. These helpful tips will really make you appreciate the finer points of owning a sex toy and allow you to get the best possible performance out of them.

One think to watch out for is alcohol. My Dr said not to drink for 1 year after surgery due to risk of bleeding ulcers. Your tolerance changes dramatically after as well Sent from my SM-N920G using the BariatricPal App

For some of us, a small amount of alcohol goes a long way. 2 drinks has become my personal limit. Often just one before dinner But I love that I get to change my attitude just a bit. Since being widowed last year, I rarely find myself out at night.. But it is a nice treat to be civilized and have a cocktail with a small dinner for me????

I didn't drink any alcohol for the first year. and than I allowed myself to drink my Christmas drink of bailey's and coffee. I would have been hesitate to drink to much with the fear of the nausea and perhaps vomiting that could have occurred. vomiting is a no no. we try hard not to do it. you can still go out with friends but do sip on one drink. you are only a few months from your surgery date.

A extension cord for your phone charger outlets are never close enough to the bed. Phone charger your own shampoo and conditioner and extra britches incase your sutures leak. Buy a box of alcohol wipes smelling them helps with nausea

Also talk to your primary physician. Are you having any obesity related issues such as diabetes, high blood pressure, joint pain, etc? Insurance may not cover wls unless you have exhibited obesity related issues especially at only 20 years old. Ask your dr what he/she thinks of you having wls surgery, because you will need him/her in your corner to do it. Do you have a family history of obesity, diabetes, etc? My family is the poster child of obesity and heart disease. Research research research. I can't stress that enough. You need to research the different types of surgery, the short term and long term risks involved, what the day to day life is for post surgery patients both in losing mode and maintenance mode. Are you good about taking daily pills every single day? After surgery, Vitamins are not optional and are essential to keeping you healthy. This is a tool, not a solution. You can gain weight even after sleeved if you don't continue to follow the eating plan and make good choices. Drinking is almost prohibited due to how quickly alcohol enters the bloodstream post surgery. Losing weight rapidly will increase the likelihood of loose skin, even at your age. You can't expect to have a bikini body just because you lost weight. Basically, this is a serious decision you need to make and before you do so, you need to take the time to do your research.

I work at Cracker Barrel as a waitress. When I started working there years ago I struggled with all of the food. I'm sure fast food is different for it might be more available to you. For me I would have to take a scheduled break or eat after or before my shift. First for me anyway , after working with the same food all the time I am tired of it. It's like working in a donut shop or pizza place, after awhile you might eat it out of conveniece but it is not what you crave. Try to ask yourself if you really want it or is it the idea it is front of you. Bring your lunch, suck on a mint, drink lots of water. Come prepared. Also something that really helped me especially on pre op clear liquid diet was I did not say to myself, "oh that looks good" I said ewwwwww, that is not going to help me. I believe working in the food industry that it is more mindless eating, if you do crave it you know it is the bad carbs your addicted to. Start off treating yourself to something somewhere else. Once you break the habot of MC"D"S food amd swear it off then you can concentrate on starting to make better food choices. Right now your like an alcoholic working in a bar. It doesn't work. Your mindset has to change totally or definitly get a new job.

Great point, Laura-ven. My sorority house days would have been seriously slighted and there was no way I was mature enough to say no to things I should have (like alcohol). From a 41 year old POV, I say yes, from my 18 year old self, hell no.

This subject does come up frequently, and it usually provokes some pretty strong opinions on all sides. I'll state the same things I have stated on this subject before: If you are really serious about losing weight, you need to consider giving up the booze. It is NOT conducive to good health OR weight loss, regardless of what some small studies say about the occasional glass of wine. Don't get me wrong; I always enjoyed a good blast of hootch, but NOTHING could make me feel as good as I do as a thin person. Sure, you could have a drink occasionally; you could also have a Snickers on occasion. Or a Hot Fudge Sundae. But WHY would you want to, after everything you have been through with your weight? It's the little decisions that we make on a moment to moment basis that impacts our health so dramatically. A shot of booze here, some cheez whiz there,....it all adds up. And you don't NEED a drink to be happy or have fun....if you DO,....well,,,,there are perhaps some other issues that you might want to address. There are certain things you need to eat to live..... Alchohol is one of those things you do NOT need. And it can hurt you in a number of ways. Also, consider the very real idea that after you have had one or two drinks, your will-power does tend to diminish, if not vanish entirely. This could lead to more drinks, and then the snacking that can often accompany a buzz. Sure, you can drink. Sure, you can have that piece of pizza, that slice of cake. But will that move you ANY closer to your goal? Nope. Will it keep you away from your goal? A little, tiny bit, yes. And will it continue to expose you to the foods that made you fat to begin with? Sure will. A couple of you have said your Drs have said that it is OK to have a drink.. Some have said their doctors advised against consuming alcohol. You will find Drs that say both. But….I would challenge you to ask any Dr if it would be better that you did NOT have a drink/Pizza/whatever. I can guarantee you that probably %100 would say that it would be better if you didn't. You always have a choice. And you should always strive to make the HEALTHY choice. S.

I’m a little over 3 years post op losing 96 pounds and have gained 20 back with alcohol being the main reason. Also, it’s become a habit as I have been drinking daily. I tend to eat more and the wrong foods when drinking. Today is the second day I haven’t had a drink and I’m going to try to only drink on Friday and Saturday and switch from wine to sugar free vodka. I was a big drinker before surgery and an even bigger one after. I hope you find what works for you to lose the weight, best of luck!

Wise words. Really look into this if you're having trouble with alcohol - if you're restricting yourself too much for a period of time, your subconscious will find ways to break 'free'. And alcohol can be just one such way. Ie. if you've told yourself you'll never have x, y or z food, then be curious if alcohol becomes a 'get out of jail free' card to have that food. Because what may end up happening is all those desires channel into the alcohol, and then you've got two, not one, problem. For most, the cure for being out of control is not more control, but finding a balance. To not see any foods as good or bad, but as food, period. To count calories, but allow oneself to go over some days and under others. Again, if you're perfectly happy within the restrictions we set for ourselves here, fine. I am most of the time. Yet I know it's so much better to have a few popsicles than it is to get myself drunk to make the popsicles happen anyway.

Gum is not recommended by my surgeon because of the gassiness it can cause. Chewing gum almost always results in swallowing air. Most sugar free gums are sweetened with sugar alcohols rather than aspartame or Splenda and so on. Those can make you gassy too. Sugar free popsicles are ok on my plan, but sometimes cold fluids can make your pouch really hurt. We were told to stick with room temperature fluids to avoid that problem.

Love the health & fitness facts! I've gotta pass them along to some friends who have been arguing that sugar, caffeine, alcohol, and grease are the four basic food groups.

This was sent to me by a good friend of mine. I laughed so hard. Great Answers to some good questions. Health & Fitness - The Facts: Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap. Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products. Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake? A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the Water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up! Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc. Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain ... Good Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you? A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you? Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach. Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa Beans .... another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around! Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me. Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' *is* a shape! Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets -- and remember, "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - strawberries in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming - WOO HOO! What a Ride!"

Let me give a follow-up to my situation. No evidence could be found in any tests that I was experiencing intussusception. Eventually, the only diagnosis that could be suggested was that there was some ulcers. The only basis for that was that I mentioned that I had gotten into the habit of drinking wine in the evenings. Altogether I had a highly acidic diet and had stopped taking Omeprazole. I stopped drinking alcohol, stopped eating a pot of chili a week, and started back on Omeprazole. A year later and I have not had any other symptoms. Over the past year I have become an avid cyclist and am in the best shape of my life. As I think about it, I don't believe the pain I was experiencing was ulceration. But I needed to remove the likelihood of that diagnosis in order for them to be able to figure out what my problem might be. On the other hand, I don't think my pain was as severe as it should have been if I did have an intussusception. I don't know, so I intend to stick with my current way of life, which is greatly improved over where I was a year and a half ago. Still really, really glad I had the gastric bypass surgery. I'm working on losing some more with a goal of another 15 lbs. so I'll reach the 200 lbs. lost goal.

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls. 2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas! 3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy . Eat the volcano. Repeat. 4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission. 5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello? 6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog. 7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas Cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again. 8. Same for pies. Apple. pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day? 9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards. 10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!" Have a great holiday season! (PS, THESE ARE NOT LAPBAND FRIENDLY TIPS, BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT)

You can’t “reset” your pouch. Pouch reset is a fad diet that was started by someone that wanted to sell products on the Internet. It is bogus and is not necessary. If you’re fighting regain you should go back to the basics and eat dense protein first followed by non-starchy vegetables. Cut out simple carbs, sugar, processed food, soda, alcohol, and fast food. Your pouch/tool is fine and hasn’t stretched, you’re just eating too many slider foods that don’t let you feel restriction. If you’re struggling with emotional or binge eating, see a therapist to work through your issues. Trying to fix this with fad dieting or that mindset won’t work long term as it never did pre-WLS and is not sustainable. It’s about healthy strategies & coping mechanisms now. You can do this! Good luck.