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When food is Love by Geneen Roth (actually, anything by Geneen Roth) Eat it Up! by Connie Stapleton Overeater's Anonymous literature (OA.org) Alcoholic's Anonymous Big Book (replace alcohol and alcoholic with food and compulsive eater and it applies) Not food related, but very helpful: The One Life Solution by Dr. Henry Cloud Anything by Brene Brown The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

I'm getting re-banded next week- so excited. My band slipped and was removed 2yrs ago and I've gained 50lbs back. Ready for it to be back and the excess weight to go away! One major rule I broke last time was drinking soda and not waiting the specified times before and after drinking. As for the soda, I'm already thinking about what I could use to replace my beloved captain and Coke. So far I've only come up with using those crystal light packets and ordering Water and captain or vodka. Any suggestions? Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Ha! I'm 70 years old. I walk and hike and move more and do a lot more housework and gardening than I used to do. And I do some yoga and stretching ("rolling around on the floor"). I do fidget more than I used to, and I think that counts, too. But I don't run and am not a gym rat in the least. My number one exercise rule is: "Don't hurt yourself!" I am newly retired (which means less work stress), but we've had a lot of family stress (death of an adult child, husband has cancer, hubby's father and my mother died) in the last year. And don't even ask about the pets! My food is "pretty clean" -- in that I eat around 100 grams daily of animal and plant Protein, and a lot of veggies, fruits, whole grains. I hardly ever eat fast food. Most days I have one alcoholic drink and one sugar treat unless my weight is above 135. I get in 64 ounces of liquids a day. FYI, I didn't eat like a bird when I was losing weight -- following my bariatric P.A.'s advice I averaged 800 cals/day the first 4 months, then 1,000 cals in months 5-6, then 1,200 cals in months 7-8. In all, I've lost 100 pounds, including 19 pounds pre-op. It took me 8 months to lose the last 15 pounds. I have NO IDEA why some people can maintain while eating more than others. And I have no idea if I'll always be able to eat like this and maintain this weight. I think you just have to find out what your body likes and then be willing to do that. I also think you should have the courage to try other combinations to see if they work better for you. I have learned a lot of things that helped me lose weight and maintain weight, including: * Eating protein and eating protein first works. * Eating healthy veggies works, too. * Sugar makes you crave more sugar. You may have to go cold turkey on sugar's ass. * Fast food isn't very satisfying in any way. * Eating slowly and chewing well helps. * Grazing is the road to perdition. * Healthy Snacks are excellent and aren't even close to the same thing as grazing. * Taking my meds and supplements every day works. * Weighing every morning works. Otherwise, I would wander off into the weeds. * Positive self-talk, keeping a positive attitude and cultivating a big sense of humor (and appreciating others' funny bones) help. * Seeing my therapist once a month helps. * Having a spouse who constantly says, "Great ass, babe!" is lovely. That's all I got for now. If I learn anything else, I'll mention it .

It's not worth it, it really isn't. I have read a lot about alcohol abuse after surgery. Our body's can't handle it and it goes through our system very quickly. We would need more to get the same affect. Why trade one addiction for another? Where I work a woman was fired after WLS because she became an alcoholic; she actually came to work under the influence. I am going to France and would love to sample some wine while I am there but it won't be worth it (I will have a dessert or two though...also a no-no but no DUI)

Right? Imagine there were a surgery (say, a brain surgery) that could cure 75% of alcoholics and opiate addicts and it had a lower risk of complications than knee replacement. People would be singing the praises of that surgery, and people who needed it would be encouraged to get it. There wouldn't be a huge chorus of naysayers saying things like "why don't you just kick your addiction the natural way?" and "you just need to go to more AA meetings" and "you just need to work on will power and drinking less" or "my Aunt Mabel's hairdresser had that surgery and he died! Plus I know of one other person who had it, and she stopped using oxycontin but she looks kind of sickly. Why don't you just stop shooting up instead?" or "you can be healthy and be an alcoholic too! Health at any drinking rate is fine! Just try to cut back if you find you've been diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver. You don't need surgery, you only think you do because our society shames alcoholics and drug addicts!"

Thanks, @ ... but admittedly, that menu was a little more than I normally eat, which is 1700 - 1800 cals/day with around 100 grams of Protein. Just be aware that I weigh every morning, measure everything and track my food in My Fitness Pal. I'm still maintaining right on the button -- 135 pounds. But if that were to change, I'd have to change my menus, too. The main thing to remember is that you have to find out what works for YOU. Please know I didn't eat ANY chocolate or drink ANY alcohol for at least 6 months post-op. Or for 2.5 months pre-op. I've added these and other treats back in very gradually and very carefully. Sometimes chocolate does get the better of me and I have to let it go for a while. In other words, I'm just trying now to live like a normal person who's perhaps a bit hyper-attentive to what she's doing. I'm trying to be "mindful" and care for myself better than I ever have before. Good luck to us both!

I was told that we couldn't have any for three months. Since then I've had some wine and some beer, but I'm not much of a drinker. Most likely yes, you will never have a pint of beer again, only because it won't fit in you. You would probably be able to have a few sips before feeling full. nothing against the poster but I find it interesting how much people worry about alcohol. don't drink much so it's not a big deal for me but I find it interesting to see people worrying about not being able to have a beer again. I would think that loosing weight and becoming healthy is more important than some alcohol. I felt similar about not being able to binge at a buffet, but I keep telling myself that it's a small price to pay for loosing all the weight

Has anyone started drinking alcohol yet? I know we are not supposed to. But I'm curious how everyone deals with social events. Is there a go to 'safe' recommended drink? Will I really never have a pint of beer again?? Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

gained two pounds over the weekend LOL. being a very very bad girl. saturday night mother's day dinner with four course meal (see below) then alcohol alcohol alcohol! so this week it's all no sugar (not even fruit or high sugar veggies like corn or carrots!) no carbs, no alcohol and clean up my act! workout five times is the goal. 3x is the min. let's do this! need to get to 140!

Breyers SF ice cream made me poop myself, no lie. My nutritionists says it was likely due to sugar alcohols in it. So never again.

I'm 9 months post op. I average 750-900 cal. a day, mostly lean protein and veggies. Weight loss has slowed but still losing 10-15 lbs a month. I am able to eat larger portions now but just because i CAN doesn't mean I SHOULD. I have begun dabbling in carbs, you know the simple ones that got us to this forum in the first place. My body clings to them like a drowning man to a rope. Any weight loss comes to a SCREECHING halt. I can even gain several pounds in a day. WTF!!! I have two things only on my no go list, carbonation and alcohol. I tried both once, and did NOT like the results for either. I look at it this way, I know there is poison ivy in the woods. As hard as I try to avoid it, sometimes it gets me. But if I start to itch, I know what to do about it. After a little while it goes away. Once in a blue moon though, I'll get naked and roll in a patch of it, and later ask myself if it was worth it... My NUT suggested 1-2 T. of grains per day AFTER I reach my goal as a way to slow weight loss(also switching to full fat dairy-milk and cheeses). Keep up your hard work, it pays off!

I'm only 21 and the good thing is I don't drink-alcohol or sodas. My weakness are Pasta, rice and pizza. I'm just concerned how much food I'll even be allowed to eat by then I dont want to be filled with anxiety my entire trip not knowing what I eat. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Hi all, I'm new to the group and also scheduled for 5/16. I'm in NYC and my surgeon is Dr. Roslin. He does not require much of a pre-op diet - only liquids the day before (as well as no alcohol or NSAIDS for 2 weeks prior). My insurance plan did not require a diet prior to surgery either. I am working with a naturopath separately, however, and she advised me to quit gluten, dairy, and soy. I'm slowly weaning myself off coffee and that's been hard! I'm definitely scared - I've never had any kind of major surgery. But I'm as ready to get this done as I'll ever be!

Yummy, mixed it in my ninja bullet with some ice, tastes like a pina colada!!!! Minus the alcohol of course. Great for a nice warm May Day in the backyard Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

My rant for the night. Neighborhood Party tonight..Everyone is there. Except me. (kicking my teddy bear)lol I live in a small private subdivision. The neighborhood gets together for parties often. At the last party, A husband got uncomfortably friendly with me. A hello kiss and moving in too close. He demanded I have a shot with him. I avoided him for the night and chalked it up to alcohol. Now I have been taken off the guest list. Not a word or explanation. I am only speculating it was the situation at the last party...Who knows what other social faux pas I might have made. How did I become the bad guy here??? Damn it, We own our home.

Yes, you can drink all your weight back on -- Mountain Dew, sweet tea, high-calorie coffee drinks, sweetened alcoholic drinks, beer, etc. No liquids challenge your sleeve's restriction at all. This is why WLS practices encourage patients NOT to drink their calories. Yes, you can eat all your weight back on -- chips, Cookies, crackers, ice cream, etc. Those foods don't challenge your sleeve's restriction at all. This is why WLS practices encourage patients NOT to eat slider foods. Yes, you can lounge all your weight back on -- not move, exercise, or be active. This is why WLS practices encourage patients to become more active and regular exercisers post-op. And yes, you can simply eat too much (even a little too much) of "healthy food." Over time, those extra calories will turn into pounds and inches, just as they always did before.

It's impossible to compare two individuals' acid reflux across the Internet. But I also had acid reflux pre-sleeve. I was prescribed Ranitadine (150 mg.) twice a day, but for some dumb reason (not typical of me at all) I thought I was only supposed to take it once a day. And as we all know (or I assume we do) too much acid in the stomach mimics hunger. So one winter not long ago, I swear I packed on an extra 20-25 pounds due solely to not taking my H2 blocker antacid meds as instructed. Anyway, post-sleeve my surgeon prescribed (for 3-4 months only!) a PPI (Protonix in my case). After that I went back to Ranitadine 150 mg. 2x/day. And now, my acid reflux is no worse than it was pre-sleeve. In the meantime, I've learned a lot about what increases reflux problems -- lots of alcohol, coffee, chocolate, eating late at night, lying down soon after eating, etc. And I avoid doing those things most of the time. Or at least piling them on all at one time. I hope your acid reflux would not be aggravated by a sleeve. Because the sleeve is an amazing tool for weight loss and healthier living. I'm 20.5 months post-op, have lost 100 pounds and maintaining at 135 pounds. (I keep repeating my WLS stats on comments to new posters' threads folks, because most people are on the mobile app and can't see our profiles -- apologies to the long-time posters.) As you probably know from your research, a gastric bypass is less likely to invite reflux problems. But bypasses have some other lifestyle requirements you may have to think hard about. Many people here have had bypass surgery and are happy with their choice. It just wasn't my choice. Best to you!

I remember eating a lot of those. Just make sure the sugar alcohols aren't giving you the runs.

Hi Breanna, I hope you won't mind me sharing some answers even though I'm much earlier in the process than you (pre-op research phase). 1. what is your biggest fear with the surgery and why? Besides surgical complications (i.e., stricture, adhesions, internal scarring, having to redo the surgery for some reason), my biggest fear is not correctly handling my vitamin/nutrient needs at any time post-surgery. I've watched YouTube videos of people many years out from surgery who either lapsed in taking their Vitamins and suffered ill effects or one who "overdosed" on B6 (found in Protein, B complex vitamins, energy drinks) and got sick as B6 is not a routine lab test even for bariatric patients. Of course I plan to be complicit with the Vitamin recommendations of my NUT, but in the past I've put my medical needs second or third to work and mental health issues, so I'm weighing the possibility of that happening again if I get WLS and thinking of how to make sure I prioritize my physical health. 2. Who has been your biggest supporter for your surgery so far? And how has that impacted your decision? My mom, whether she realizes it or not. She's not 100% in favor of the surgery, but she knows I'm an adult, has my best interests at heart, and listens to me. 3. What is your goal weight and why? I'll probably take my doctor's lead on this one, as a major motivating factor for my surgery is comorbidities. I think the remission of my sleep apnea will be the deciding factor. Honestly, I've never been in 100s as an adult (I'm 5'5") so I don't have a weight I'm able to envision. It'd be nice to be in straight sizes for clothes, but I make do at my current size and am sure I'd do fine as a 16, 14, or 12, as well. 4. What was the one thing that made you be for sure about the surgery? Being diagnosed/experiencing four to five major comorbidities (including diabetes type 2 and most recently sleep apnea) has made me realize I am scared to go on the way I am. I'm not 100% for sure on the WLS yet, but am seriously considering it. 5. What is one thing you are giving up that you will truly miss having? As I understand it, unless something causes severe dumping there's no need to avoid it totally (with the exception of carbonated beverages, alcohol, depending on your body). I guess the hardest thing will be cutting back on sedentary activities I enjoy (computer, reading) in order to move more. 6. If you have had the surgery or are getting ready for it... what is one piece of advice you have for those that are just starting their journey? Listen to a VARIETY of voices from people who have been there. YouTube is a great place to hear from others, both positive and negative. People here and on YouTube recommended The Emotional First Aid Kit: A Practical Guide to Life After Bariatric Surgery, 2nd Ed. by Cynthia Alexander which I'm halfway through and feel good about recommending to others, too. Hope this helps, Breanna. Best wishes as you continue to move forward.

Mine was necessary because I had NASD: Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease. My liver (which lays in front of the stomach) was enlarged and needed to be shrunk so that the doctor could have easier access to my stomach. I was on liquids for ten days.

Hi Gina, This is jackh in a different account. I apologize if my post upset (as it obviously did) you. I'm sorry for the medical struggles you are going through. My post wasn't directed at someone whose obesity was caused by the kind of medical issues you have. I too am weak but I'm really trying to psych myself in a positive direction with this whole thing. I'm sorry for not being as supportive as you might need because that is what should be going on here is all of us trying to be supportive. I'm a drug and alcohol addiction counselor who runs into a lot of excuse making in my clients and I've run into tons of it in myself as well and I've been conditioned to confront it in myself and in others. So I'm sorry for being too blunt and harsh without knowing the real struggles that people are going through on here. I don't want to be a source of distress for you or anyone else and really want to be supportive. But I also know that sometimes the best support comes from not what we want to hear but what we need to hear. And just venting to vent without looking for solutions and then becoming willing to apply those solutions will get us nowhere because if nothing changes, nothing changes. And for me I know that change I must or die I will. So most of what I post is really directed at my own tendency to bs myself. And if it applies to anyone else then cool but if not then take what you need and leave the rest. I wish you well and I hope and pray that the surgery really helps you with these medical issues and whatever else you need help with.

Me too. I actually never received (or thought I needed) therapy for my food/alcohol addictions. Successfully lost all my excess weight and was maintaining easily. I was a strong, confident, invincible woman! Then I lost my best friend to suicide. By refusing to drown my emotions with calories like I'd always done before, I sunk into a very deep depression because I never learned an alternative coping mechanism. I was actually FEELING my emotions for the first time and it sucked. So I started seeing a grief counselor. Like you, turns out its helping in all aspects of my life and wished I'd done it long ago. Maybe that would have helped me from getting so damn fat in the first place.

Definitely get help. I to work in the medical field and I had a coworker that had RNY and shr ended up becoming an alcoholic. She ended up losing her Xray license. Definitely not something to mess around with. Sent from my SM-G900V using the BariatricPal App

So listening to the same brain that got you in this state instead of listening to your surgeon is smart! Instead of getting pissed off about how the surgeons have different requirements how about doing what your told and then dealing with it. I'm on my 3rd day preop diet and although there have been tough moments they pass. If I'm giving into the negative mental pity party I'm screwed before I even have the surgery. Our biggest battle is the psychological one and if our mindset sucks then this experience is going to suck. A dr. told me yesterday to focus on doing this one day at a time like recovering alcoholics and drug addicts do. I also focus on the prize. Plus I want my surgeons job to be easier since he's going to be digging around my innards. And I see this as the natural consequence of being so damned over indulgent all those many years. Quite frankly suck it up and get over yourself. You have a chance at a whole new life and if that doesn't make you happy no amount of weight loss will either. Sent from my SM-G900V using the BariatricPal App

I'm on my third day and there are moments when it's difficult but they pass. Instead of focusing on how much this sucks I focus on the prize. I also focus on what I have to do today. I know I have 11 more days until surgery but I can only live one day at a time. It's the same mindset recovering addicts and alcoholics use. And it helps tremendously. Another way I look at it is that is part of the price I have to pay for letting myself overindulge for so many years. This won't kill me but the weight will. Our mindsets are where the biggest battle is fought and if I give into a negative mindset about this then I've already lost the battle. And I'll be damned if I'm going to let that happen this early in the process and hopefully at no point in the process. Sent from my SM-G900V using the BariatricPal App