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Since I am not a professional therapist I can not give your professional advice. Besides, if I were, you'd have to pay me! I would consider therapy for the two of you---alone and then together. You HAVE changed. He hasn't and maybe doesn't want to. Remember, there are few things more irritating than: an x-alcoholic, a born again Christian, or a recent weight lost "know what's best for every one". He may be able to listen and talk to someone objective rather than be "preached" to by you===even well intented. Get going on getting your marriage back on track. Do NOT put therapy off---hoping it "he will come around". I know. Wishing you nothing but many years of happily married life.

There's probably hormones involved in the anxiety. It's not unusual for alcohol to become an issue post WLS. Did you work with a therapist or Psych pre-op? I'd make an appointment to discuss both the anxiety and potential alcohol addiction. Keeping you in my prayers! Stay strong, Dave!

Do you mean "alcohol issues" in terms of addiction? Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Can anyone give some support on alcohol issues after sleeve surgery? No negative comments please. Sent from my XT1585 using the BariatricPal App

BTW....post op wind pain can be awful. In the Alex they give you peppermint tea but it doesn't work. From getting home I got peppermint cordial (from tesco in the alcohol aisle). A warm glass first thing in the morning got rid of any wind for the day and really helped getting fluids down. I still have a glass every morning. Sent from my SM-G935F using the BariatricPal App

Hi guys, so excited for you!!! I had mine 2.5 weeks ago. In prep for mine, I gave up alcohol and caffeine and cut down on sugar. I'm starting a blog to talk about my experiences and changing my life to a healthy lifestyle. If you want to follow it, I am going to talk about my surgery and the days following... You can email me goodmorningfromthegarden@gmail.com Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

Maybe your cousin is upset that you don't need her in that way anymore and is unsure of the relationship between you two? If we were talking about my grandmother I KNOW that would be the case. I've 35 first cousins, and I had parents who loved and cared for me and put me first. Unless you needed her, my grandmother had no use for you. Unfortunately, most of my fathers 8 siblings were alcoholics or emotionally stifled by my grandmother and their children needed the help said woman could -and did- give them. This cousin was actually taken in and raised by her. We spent our lives living either up and down or next door to each other. Only a year apart in age, we didn't even LIKE one another until we entered high school and were able to spend time together away from her. I laugh now, but recall when my cousin graduated college and my grandmother made a HUGE ordeal out of her being the "first" grandchild to graduate. Stunned sitting there, I remember standing up and saying loudly across the room "Geez, I didn't realize the Bachelors I just received last year from Northwestern F****** University didn't count-I wouldn't have spent all that time and money there" and walked out of the party. Oh the baggage we carry lol. May as well finish- Said grandmother as she aged became very nice to me in my late 20's and my joke was that Grandma was going senile- she forgot to be a witch to me. Oddly- maybe not so much- at her funeral I stood there and cried so hard. Maybe because I was newly pregnant with my second child, but more likely because I was grieving for the relationship she robbed me of. Ok. All done. That felt good. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I waited about the same as @@Dub, maybe a little less, but only had a few sips of wine. I don't think I would've been able to get down a whole glass at that point. I'd definitely stay away from beer and other carbonated beverages though. I will reiterate what I tend to in these threads, and that is to be aware of the fact that alcohol is simply empty calories. So soon after surgery, those calories are valuable as you can't consume very many, so you have to make a choice where to "spend" them, and alcohol gives nothing in return (as far as your weight loss is concerned ). Also, I made sure I cleared with doc first, and first try was at home in case things "didn't go well". Best of luck

Try doing a search for alcohol and then get ready to read all sorts of views. I waited until third month.

First off, I'm so sorry for your losses. I work in cancer research and I know the trials that families go through, especially if it is a long, drawn-out process. I lost my mom in 2015 from a heart attack, and in a strange way I'm thankful she passed quickly and that's something I don't think I'd say unless I worked in the field I do... I have had depression from a very young age, and I had to explain to the psychologist how my last major depressive episode was 2015 after my mom died (complicated relationship), and I was also planning my wedding, which was also super stressful. She asked me if I thought my feelings about my mom were regular grief or true depression, and I think it's important to know where the grief ends and the depression takes over. My own med history says I was on prozac, zoloft, paxil, celexa, and wellbutrin for my depression, not all at the same time of course (age ~15 - 22ish). I have depression and bipolar and alcoholism on every branch of my family tree, so I was careful to explain the situations I was under while taking these meds, and how I handle it now. If you show your resilience and that your coping mechanisms are healthy ones, they should clear you. The fact you are seeking help and are on a stable dose of antidepressants shows you take initiative to properly help yourself, instead of self-medicating with food of alcohol, for example. Best of luck!

I have introduced alcohol back in a few months ago. I have 1.5 oz vodka in 32 ounces of Water and a squirt sugar free package. Very tasty and no issues. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Am on a two week vacation in Europe. Had a first cocktail last night - Campari and tonic. Didn't feel the alcohol but I felt I had a pre-dinner cocktail vs the typical iced tea. Thanks for all your answers. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I have never seen bone broth with medicinal in front of it. I opened this thread expecting to read about the wonders of alcohol infused bone broth, only to learn we are just talking about normal bone broth

8 days post op ate 1/2 a hot dog without the bun fresh off the grill. I then proceeded to eat a snack size bag of Doritos. They both went down fine, no problems afterward. I was very disappointed in myself, got back on plan and week 3 I had popcorn and vernors (gingerale). I Also ate salad. Again no issues just guilt. Then I made a choice to follow my plan to the letter for the next 3 weeks until I was on reggies (regular). I did. I also spent that time planning out meals, Protein, exercise so that I could really enbrace this lifestyle. I have alcohol on occasion. I ate a slice of cake at a wedding. This time. No guilt. I have the power. I made an informed choice. I no longer consider it cheating. Maybe not the best choice but I maintain accountability for my choices.

Mine was yesterday no test just asked questions like how long over weight, meds I'm on any history of drug, alcohol abuse what wax childhood like. What am I trying to do now to prepare for surgery. It was a nice visit and I was nervous too. He asked if I eat due to stress or emotions as well. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Have you thought to let your hair just "breathe free" so it can get some direct nutrients and moisturizers--maybe use Motions, Design Essentials or other [products with NO ALCOHOL, that dry hair]--and give your hair a break from that stuff and possible more entanglement (plus the weight of the added hair)? Hair loss happens to most; it will need the most direct care, moisture, nutrition, scalp massage you can give it. Not through those materials. Good moisturizers, a flat Iron on low...you're good to go. Stylish. Maybe loosely braid it at night/bedtime; silk scarf or pillow case. Just a thought. Good luck.

I stick to high Protein for the most part: eggs, tuna, salmon, Greek yogurt, and some veggies. On a not so good say I might add some rice or Pasta. I also have a drink from time to time. How bad do u think that affects weight loss? Sent from my SM-N910V using the BariatricPal App I'd say that the "drink from time to time" is as wide ranging in impact to your weight loss as rice and pasta. Rice and pasta have zero value to you now and will certainly keep you from achieving ketosis (if that's a state you hope to get in). drinks, on the other hand, may not keep you out of ketosis for long. Depends on the type of liquor and the macro content of the mixer. I've got out for an evening and had vodka or tequila with a low calorie mixer in a 2-4 drinks......and used ketone strips the very next morning and found that I was still in ketosis and chugging along. You have to find what works for you and you have to establish priorities. For me.....my overall priority is to lose the weight that has been a burden to me. I am doing this to be healthy and enjoy my life. I can go out and have fun without losing sight of those priorities. I've learned that if I have the skinny margaritas or vodka and diet mixer.....then that is done in absence of any type of eating. Since the alcohol is empty calories....then I have to ensure I've chosen carefully earlier in the day and met my protein goals and also made some room in my calorie budget by burning some off in the gym. No longer do I go out....pound down beer and then order something horrible to eat later. My actions have to align with my priorities and have some fun times within reason. You have to find what works for you and figure out what you value. For me....it's to let pasta and rice go. I haven't missed them at all. I found spaghetti squash makes a great substitute. Great advice! Thanks Sent from my SM-N910V using the BariatricPal App

I stick to high Protein for the most part: eggs, tuna, salmon, Greek yogurt, and some veggies. On a not so good say I might add some rice or Pasta. I also have a drink from time to time. How bad do u think that affects weight loss? Sent from my SM-N910V using the BariatricPal App I'd say that the "drink from time to time" is as wide ranging in impact to your weight loss as rice and pasta. Rice and pasta have zero value to you now and will certainly keep you from achieving ketosis (if that's a state you hope to get in). drinks, on the other hand, may not keep you out of ketosis for long. Depends on the type of liquor and the macro content of the mixer. I've got out for an evening and had vodka or tequila with a low calorie mixer in a 2-4 drinks......and used ketone strips the very next morning and found that I was still in ketosis and chugging along. You have to find what works for you and you have to establish priorities. For me.....my overall priority is to lose the weight that has been a burden to me. I am doing this to be healthy and enjoy my life. I can go out and have fun without losing sight of those priorities. I've learned that if I have the skinny margaritas or vodka and diet mixer.....then that is done in absence of any type of eating. Since the alcohol is empty calories....then I have to ensure I've chosen carefully earlier in the day and met my protein goals and also made some room in my calorie budget by burning some off in the gym. No longer do I go out....pound down beer and then order something horrible to eat later. My actions have to align with my priorities and have some fun times within reason. You have to find what works for you and figure out what you value. For me....it's to let pasta and rice go. I haven't missed them at all. I found spaghetti squash makes a great substitute.

So today is my first day of pre-op. Being in the UK it's bedtime soon so I've had my day and all has gone well! I'm not really an eater so the lack of intake is ok with me. Water, Protein shake, water, water and 3oz of roast beef with a good salad. I'm sure it will get 'tense' as I head towards the op on September 13th (thankfully not a Friday!) I had a great party this weekend where I drank for to much as I said goodbye to Alcohol.... For now. So I'm starting my journey at 358lbs. Apprehensive, nervous not knowing what you don't know BUT double exited. A lot of you guys have inspired me to get this done and if I get anywhere near your successes. I will be delighted. Ollie

Early on in this thread I did empathise. However after now reading all the posts which I must say do come from a very narrow minded point of view I've seriously had my eyes opened. Seriously folks if you are planning bariatric surgery please don't pay heed to this viciously over exaggerated and very negative thread. I'm now five weeks in and although it can be a struggle at times, it's really life changing worth every once of hard work needed to gain success. Like this lady pre-op I suffered from many of the same illnesses fibromyalgia, crippling Arthritis, irritable bowel, lumber spondylosis, just to name a few. I took a large cocktail of drugs that the side effects from made me very ill and yes I was one was lyrica too. I was virtually housebound for a year. Since Xmas I've lost 3 stone. One and a half stone lost since the op Only five weeks ago. I no longer take any medication apart from paracetamols and lansoprazole which protects our stomach while it's healing. I no longer need crutches and am vitally pain free. I live in the UK and did extensive research on bariatric surgery prior to my op . I know the NHS offer an amazing comprehensive service for those lucky enough to live in a district that can fund bariatric surgery free in the UK. You get free pre counselling Good free pre op care Good post op care including medication and follow up diet all prescribed free. Free follow up appointments with your bariatric surgeon. A free post op support group And free care from a doctor if you need it. If you live in the right district her in the UK the Gastric Sleeve operation on the NHS will cost you nothing. I know people here on the UK who would jump at the chance to have this life saving and changing operation but their district has not got the funds to offer it. I hasten to add I could have gone through the NHS but chose to pay nearly £10000 for my op because I could afford it, I got the op performed within four weeks privately my decision because health was so bad and I was virtually housebound. I don't regret it at all. I now have use of private telephone support. But I also have access to a regular NHS support group where I meet people who support each other. ...................... I've just read about not knowing about the effects of bariatric surgery. This is impossible ! Everyone has a consultation with your surgeon before making the decision to have the operation . Everyone has a pre op consultation with a team of nurses. Before surgery everyone meets with their surgeon and anaesthetic consultant. Everyone has to read and sign a pre-op agreement outlining exactly what could go wrong during and after their operation. The surgeons have to be so careful. They need to know you understand all the risks. From all the frequent posts above full of drama you would think the care here on our NHS is non existent. This is not true! What worries me and many other people is a narrow minded point of view we are reading can scare monger and ruin other people's chances. I also find it extremely disturbing to read there was no understanding to what the operation entailed or what would be happening after the op. However someones pointed out a membership on this forum of ten years prior to surgery. A ten years membership here would make an expert of anyone! ...................... I've now read of another side effect from the operation is Clostridium difficile. This can be carried in the body and could be caught after any operation. Unfortunately it had to be another drama and turn into a further more serious complication. I've just read the support for this condition is also poor with no proper treatment and no doctor support. The NHS in the UK take this infection very seriously. Granted there is a massive shortage of doctors in the UK it can regularly take weeks to see one . However you can get phone call appointment and readily get nurse appointments. Also emergency appointments instantly if deemed necessary. I can't believe I've just read that while so critically ill with gastric sleeve problems and CDiff a house move have been planned actioned and is taking place... If things were so bad this would be Impossible! A house moved is deemed as one of the most stressful events we can have in our life. This can also effect our digestion and bowels. Let's look at... Clostridium difficile: What is the treatment for Clostridium difficile infection? The decision to treat C. difficile infection and on the type of treatment depends on the severity of the illness. No treatment is needed if you have no symptoms but are known to carry the germs (bacteria) in your gut. However, if symptoms develop, some of the treatments below may be needed. If you are not already in hospital, people who have mild infection can often be treated at home. However, if the infection is more severe, you will usually be admitted to hospital so that you can be treated and closely monitored. ...................... Pseudomembranous colitis signs and symptoms: Diarrhea that can be watery or even bloody. Abdominal cramps, pain or tenderness. Fever. Pus or mucus in your stool. Nausea. Dehydration. Pseudomembranous colitis self-management: To cope with the diarrhea and dehydration that can occur with pseudomembranous colitis, try to: Drink plenty of fluids. Water is best, but fluids with added sodium and potassium (electrolytes) also may be beneficial. Avoid beverages that are high in sugar or contain alcohol or caffeine, such as coffee, tea and colas, which can aggravate your symptoms. Choose soft, easy-to-digest foods. These include applesauce, bananas and rice. Avoid high-fiber foods, such as beans, nuts and vegetables. If you feel your symptoms are improving, slowly add high-fiber foods back to your diet. Eat several small meals, rather than a few large meals. Space the smaller meals throughout the day. Avoid irritating foods. Stay away from spicy, fatty or fried foods, and any other foods that cause you problems. ...................... If suffering this illness, it seems having the gastric sleeve which limits the intake of all the irritating types of foods that can make the current problem worse is really a very good thing! That is if following a gastric sleeve diet properly. That means reading all the paperwork and diet advice everyone undertaking this operation is given prior to leaving hospital. The gastric sleeve operation will help anyone recover faster. Doctors medication advice. Sensible foods, lots of liquids and don't forget your soluble or liquid vitamins ... Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

After struggling with my weight since middle school, I attended a seminar on weight loss surgery in January of 2015, fairly certain that I would have the lap-band procedure if I decided to go through with it at all. My weight has always been a sensitive subject for me, so I told no one that I was going, not even my husband. I listened to everything the surgeon said, including the issues that people with lap band were having, and that many people who had opted for lap band ended up getting a revision to the sleeve eventually. I left the seminar, impressed with the surgeon and his knowledge, but very embarrassed that I was even considering surgery. After all, I had known a few people that had surgery and gained all their weight back, and for me surgery meant that I was weak, and couldn't do it on my own. I immediately hid all the materials from the seminar in one of my dresser drawers and decided I would give losing weight on my own another shot. I decided to do a Whole 30 (for those not familiar, it's essentially an elimination diet where you get rid of all processed food, sugar, wheat, soy, alcohol, etc.) and I just knew that this time it would stick. I adhered to the Whole 30 program for the full 30 days, lost 18 pounds, and felt great about myself. Then, as is what always happens, I slowly reverted back to my old ways, and ended up gaining 25 pounds back. Just as I had every year, every diet, every resolution, every demonstration of will and determination, I had failed. Flash forward to January of this year, when the time came to consider making a change again, I gave another thought to bariatric surgery. This time, I had examples of a couple of people that had surgery and were successful. I researched more on the sleeve, and began to see where it could work for me. I had a tough conversation with my husband about my decision, who wanted to support me, but was very apprehensive. The man, whom I adore but who has never struggled with his weight a day in his life asked "Can't you just try to diet and exercise? This surgery seems very extreme." I explained all that I knew about the surgery, and, for the first time with anyone, I was completely honest about my weight and my struggles with weight loss since I was a child. While still apprehensive, he agreed to support my decision and be there for me. I attended another seminar with a different hospital in March, met with the surgeon and made the final decision to have gastric sleeve surgery. Everything was going well. My surgery was looking like it would take place in August. My insurance only required 3 months of supervised diet, I quit smoking as the surgeon required, had an endoscopy, sleep study (where I was diagnosed with sleep apnea), visited a cardiologist, was trying to do everything I was supposed to do. Then I called my surgeon's office at the end of June to check in and make sure I was still on track for an August surgery. The program coordinator got on the phone and told me that she was going to contact me, as the surgeon had made the decision to stop performing bariatric surgery, and I would need to find another surgeon. I was devastated. After everything I had done so far, I was going to have to start over. What was the point? I allowed myself to wallow for a bit, then decided that I was going to get right back on track. After all, the worst that could happen was that I may need to start from the beginning again, but if I did, what was a few more months delay compared to decades of struggle with my weight. I wound up contacting the surgeon whose seminar I attended back in 2015 and made an appointment to see him. Fortunately, they were able to get all of my records and fast track me through. After an initial denial, my insurance approved on the second request, and I was able to schedule my surgery date for August 24th. So, here I am, 5 days post op. The gas pain in the hospital was unbearable for the first 2 days, but that subsided. Right now I have pain in my upper right abdomen that is exacerbated depending on how I move or sit. Hopefully that will go away soon. I joked with my husband that this is probably how I would feel if I had stab wounds in my abdomen. I have only lost 1.5 lbs since my surgery, but I'm guessing that may be due to Fluid retention and lack of nutrients, as I am only now starting to drink my Protein and take my Vitamins. I am excited for what the rest of this journey will bring, and love reading about everyone else's stories. Sorry for the long post, this is the first time I have ever sat down and wrote about what led me to this. I hope to have some positive updates in the near future!

That's just the way it goes down in the BP and I'm sure many other support sites you will quickly learn. I guess when you're new you're feeling your way through and genuinely looking for support and meaningful advice. I guess some of us who are a little soft weren't prepared for the abrasiveness of some of the "vets" who probably have become numb to the naivety of the questions that are in obvious contradiction to their surgeons guidelines and are just about getting to the business of why you got here in the first place and how reintroducing those bad habits could cause you to complain about stalls or plain old not LOSING. Then there are the newbies who have the fear of god in them after surgery and come here for support only to find people enjoying Bacon 3 days post op, Alcohol 2 weeks post op, and whatever else they good and well please causing you to take a step back and say-- well they lived to tell about it maybe it's not that BAD-- poor choice? Hell's yeah but life or death not so much. So then you find that happy medium with all that you know. Your research+ your surgeons guidelines + your desire to be successful and recognize patterns that landed you to require surgery to lose weight in the first place then-- actively ignore those who get under your skin with their abrasiveness and sarcasm. Actively ignore posts or topics that you know will go left just based on the title "crackers" "Cheez its" or "Alcohol". Or drop your 2 cents but sashay past the comments where someone might be being a little harsh towards a perfect stranger and just filter past the BULL S H I T. We all have our journey. Some of us will be successful, some of us won't. Some of us will get there despite NOT following all guidelines to the letter, some of us will get there doing everything perfectly what matters is LONG term success. I may not like the overall tones and delivery of some members but I think at the end of the day they mean well. You should look at their successes and regard their opinion like it or not as principles to at least consider. With some of the foolishness I see as posted as topics the more I understand the vets by and bye.

For the most part I don't usually comment on these "alcohol" post, because quite frankly I just don't get it. I've never been a drinker but maybe once in a great while.....and I really mean a "great while".....I haven't had a drink in well over 2 years....haha I'm not against drinking it just doesn't take drinking in order for me to enjoy myself.....I have no problem turning down alcohol when I'm out with friends or at a party....once I get to my goal weight I'll go back to the way I used to be....once in a "great while" I may have a mixed drink....but while I'm in the weight loss phase it is not even a consideration! I have a hard time understanding people who have gone to the extreme of having most of their stomach surgically removed in order to lose weight and within a very short period of time begin drinking completely empty calories....I just can't wrap my head around that. I'm sure folks think "of course she doesn't understand. She's not a drinker.".....But I relate this to me like this; prior to surgery I loved loved Cookies and ice cream! But after letting the surgeon remove most of my stomach because I was so desperate to lose weight I would not even take a small bite of a cookie or ice cream while I'm in the weight loss phase!...but I guess that's just me. I'm also a believer in do whatever you feel is best for you....so if that includes drinking alcohol, more power to you. Good luck I wish you all the best.

I'm sixteen months out, and drink when I feel like it, and not when I don't. I've lost 120 lbs despite having a drink fairly frequently, i.e. about once or twice a week on average, although I do go weeks without drinking. Just be aware that you are more susceptible to alcohol than you were before. I had one terrible episode where I went to a party, didn't realize how much I was drinking, blacked out, couldn't remember what had happened in the morning, luckily had a friend to take me home, and woke up covered in bruises from falling down -- something that has never happened to me before in my 57 years! So embarrassing and worrying. So watch your intake carefully. Best to all.

Alcohol is worrying me right now, we have had some devastating family news and I've found alcohol is becoming my new habit most nights as I can't eat myself happy now. I had my op on May 6th this year. My weight loss is very slow and I know why. I'm trying to stay away from it now. I don't need to go from food to replace it with this poison xx Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App