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I am you! I had all of these same feelings and it almost blocked me from going through with the surgery. I have lost massive weight/inches before and got in the best shape of my life, which made me angry that I couldn't do it again. However, I had to learn to accept that I am getting older (40) and that my body has changed and no matter how angry I am at myself, that won't change the facts. I refused to continue feeling horrible every day when I woke up and being miserable with myself and the way I looked. I was also terrified by all of the horror stories I read and was scared I was going to die. I believe it's more normal than not for people to gravitate to the negatives than to see all of the positives being posted out there. It's human nature. I finally sucked it up and went to the hospital the day of surgery even though I still had all of those fears, even thinking I can still back out and leave....but my desire to feel better and live a better life outweighed all of that fear and I went through with it. BEST DECISION I'VE MADE IN MY LIFE! To add to this, I struggle with depression and anxiety and food has always been my vice/comfort. I was terrified in that respect too, that I wouldn't be able to mentally handle this journey. Surprisingly, I have been solid on that front too! After surgery, I had no cravings or desire to eat food. My family ate normal foods/fast food in front of me and it's didn't even phase me. A little over 3 months out and it still doesn't bother me. Yes, every once in a while, I think for a split second, oh man, I can't have cake on my bday! But it's really not going to kill me....I've eaten cake every year for 39 years! I'm really not missing anything. The reality of it is, we can eat the cake down the road if we want to. At this point in time, I don't really even want to. I'll close in saying that I don't know you, but I believe in you. If I could do this knowing the way my mind is and all the fear I had, you can most certainly do this. When you do, that anger will go away as soon as you realize how rewarding this journey can be. Best of luck!

I think that's some of my anger- anger at myself for needing the help, for having so many issues with food. It seems like such a weakness. It's funny, too, because i would never tell someone else it's a weakness or believe it was. Only for myself. I've been in therapy for a long time now and we've talked about my weight, of course, but never as honestly as I've been forced to since I made the decision to do this. I also am big on feeling in control, and I feel like the surgery is going to take control away from me. I know that's not how it works; I know it's the opposite- I'm not in control now and the surgery will help me regain control. But something about having rules around food just is a huge trigger for some reason.

Have a big dummy spit. It is hard and it is awful. You have been set up by society two ways. Society sets us up by having a system that dangles so many tempting foods in our face while at the same time limits our normal everyday movement by having cars and computers machines that do the heavy lifting for us. No manual labor for us. Many people are chronically overweight but are a victim of our modern society. Our metabolism has changed. Our bodies are hard wired to retain fat in order so that we can survive in times of famine. You are allowed to be angry. You got lots of help from society to be where you are. So while is is important to acknowledge our own behaviours we had so much help from our environment, Obesity is a chronic modern day disease. BUT..... (You knew this was coming).... You can make a choice to put self care strategies into place. Stop treating your body like a trash can. Your body has a way to heal itself with your help. You can give your body a better chance. It will be okay. If you google search Dr V Masterclass on youtube you can find some stellar info on this journey. I want to encourage you to care about yourself and your future. In your post you mentioned giving up certain foods or having sugar free products. This is a new road for us and no two journeys are the same. I thought I would not be able to have chocolate any more after having my RNY bypass. Turns out that I can still enjoy chocolate but in much smaller amounts. Not a big sacrifice. I can still eat pretty much everything I used to eat, but again in smaller amount. Many people lose hair after this OP but not all do. I didnt. Reading about this journey in a pamphlet or on social media is one thing. Things might or might not happen. Only by doing this will you find out what is is really like for you and what issues you may or may not have. Having a medical procedure is one thing. It is another ball game to address reasons of why we eat and getting some psychological help. A medical procedure like this Is just an effective tool to lose the weight but being successful requires a combination of physical and psychological work. Life is so much easier now that I have shed some weight. I can walk further. I can take care of my physical needs. I feel so much better and am off my diabetes medication and bp medication and off my reflux meds. I dont have to be scared anymore about breaking chairs. I feel better in myself. Be mad and move past it. Get ready to love yourself.

Exactly as @catwoman7 said. Stalls are an important part of your weight loss. It’s when your body takes stock (the changes you’ve made are pretty stressful to your poor body), reassesses your needs & then adjusts your digestive hormones, metabolic rate, etc. The stall will break when your body is ready to move forward again - usually 1-3 weeks. Let it take the time it needs, stick to your plan & it will be fine. Oh, and you’ll likely have more stalls along the way. All the best. PS - congrats on your weight loss so far!

Snap! I woke up one morning & said enough too. I made an appointment with my doctor to start the process the same day. Best decision I’ve ever made. Your anger is a stage of the grief you’re experiencing which is quite a common before &/or after surgery. Doesn’t matter how much you read about life post surgery, it’s not until you experience it yourself do you fully understand. So you are also in a place of fear of the unknown. Talking with your therapist is a great idea to work your way through your anger, grief & fear. And keep referring to that list of positives. They’ll become blessings before you know it. It seems a long time at the beginning but in time you’ll look back & realise it wasn’t that long - the progress & benefits of your weight loss sort of blurs the time & makes it worthwhile. Most importantly get off the social media sites about bariatric surgery. They are the worst. They’ll feed your fear & anger. The ones I’ve seen give you tips on how eat around your surgery, how not to follow your plan (saw one sharing how to purée a fast food burger & fries 😱) & offer little support or encouragement. Yes, there are risks but there are with any surgery & bariatric surgery is far lower than many others including appendectomies & knee replacement. Your risks are much higher simply by remaining obese. As to whether you’ll be able to eat your favourite foods again the answer is yes. Though you’ll eat them less often & in smaller portions. You’ll work out how much & how often is best for you over time. You may even find alternatives &/or ingredient substitutes that are better for you & more nutritious. I looked at some of my old favourite foods & decided while I loved them they really didn’t love me & contributed to my obesity. You may find you discover new favourite foods & even that your old ones just don’t appeal as much. I’m a low sugar eater & avoid artificial sweeteners wherever I can (rather have a little real sugar than a sweetener). The shakes can be disgusting & have sweeteners but you don’t have to keep having them. I haven’t had one since I started purées & even in the post surgery liquid stage I only had one a day. Had soup for my other meals. Then I discovered a high protein yoghurt & yoghurt drinks to boost my protein intake. (Make your own drink by blending the yoghurt with milk which gives you bonus protein.) Your dietician should be able to help you find other suitable alternatives as well. All the best.

Weight loss is never a straight down ward line. It zigs & zags, goes up & down & plateaus. As long as your general trend is downwards you’re golden. The thing about averages is all they give you is an idea of what might happen not what definitely will happen. In saying that, if you’re currently averaging about a 15lb a month weight loss then in three months you can expect to lose about 45lbs which puts you in the middle of your average 40-50lb loss at three months. But it really doesn’t matter whether you do or don’t. Yes, we do tend to lose more in the first months & then our rate of loss slows. It doesn’t mean your weight loss is over though. When you get closer to the weight you stabilise at it can feel like it’s going to take forever to lose the last pounds - like losing ounces each week. I kept losing at that slow rate for months after I reached my goal at 6 months. I lost another 11kgs over the next 11 months. (I wasn’t actively trying to lose but my body wanted to lose more.) So I was losing for about 17 months in total. The averages were completely off the mark for me. Breath. Work your plan. And celebrate every pound you lose.

Hi! I'm new here. I went through about six months of the process for WLS about four or five years ago, but I didn't lose weight during the six-month pre-op phase, so things stopped. I had also been running across many horror stories (mostly on social media), which made me think that maybe it was for the best, anyway. Well, five years later, I weigh no less than I did back then. I have a huge list of co-morbidities, some of which are related to weight, some I had prior to my weight gain, and a couple that cause weight gain. I'm on over ten meds a day, and I'm only 42 (well, 43 in a few days). I feel like I'm falling apart. I think the last straw was that my oldest son got married in June. I saw myself in the wedding photos. I ruminated on that for a few weeks, and then woke up one morning and decided I was sick of obesity and everything that goes along with it. So, I asked my PCP for the referral, and I have my first appointment in September. Because I did six months of their program and because I read their patient handbook, I have a better idea of what is expected of me than I might otherwise. But I'm angry. I'm angry that I'm going to have to give up my favorite foods or accept sugar-free versions (and I can't stand artificial sweeteners; I'm actually really worried about it because most protein drinks/powders seem to rely on them). I'm angry that I won't be able to eat like everyone else. I'm angry that I'll have to go through so much physically. I'm angry that I have to lose weight to have surgery to help me lose weight that I need because I can't lose weight on my own. And I'm angry that it's such a long process. If I have to do it, tell me what to do, let me sulk over it for a few days, and then let's just do it. I know that's not how it works, and I don't know why I'm so angry. I have no one to blame but myself for being in this mess. I made a list of positives that could come from the surgery, and I got a full two pages. So I shouldn't be angry. And I realize my reaction shows that I have inappropriate attitudes toward food. I've discussed it with my therapist, and we're going to work on it, but I guess I was wondering if anyone else dealt with this and what helped them get past it. TIA!

My mom said the same thing, she told me i could do it on my own. I kept telling her I could not and would not lose 110lbs on my own. I finally had to be blunt with her and tell her to get over it because i was doing the surgery. She has been supportive now. Don't let anyone else tell you what to do. You know what you have to do and if that is surgery as a tool to help you lose the weight then go for it. We are all very supportive so if you feel like you do not have a good support system then just come here to this forum. We will support you!!!!

i think you are doing spectacular and are so inspirational. Congratulations to you on your weight loss journey and going ahead to pursue your dreams! You are a weight loss hero in my eyes!!!! By the way, i noticed awhile ago you changed your profile picture, and you look fantastic!!!!

Way to go on losing 32lbs! Sounds good to me. I know your frustration though. I am 4.5 months out and have lost almost 60lbs but I have been "stuck" at 172 for about 2 weeks. UGH! I have had a couple stalls here and there but none that lasted this long. It is aggravating but as everyone always says, stick with the plan and your stall will come to an end and you will lose more weight. Congratulations on your weight loss journey so far!

Surgery Date: 7/31/2023 How are you? I feel amazing. My energy is good although I do feel tired quicker. How's your process going? I am steadily losing weight down 26lbs since the day of my surgery and 61lbs since I started this journey. What are you excited about for the future? I have a closet full of vintage clothing in a variety of sizes. Once I get to my goal weight and have maintained it for a while I am going to have everything fitted to my body which I have never done so things either fit right or they didn't. What are you enjoying now? I am enjoying seeing the number on the scale go down and how my clothes are fitting. How are you talking about the upcoming surgery with family and friends? I did not share my surgery with anyone outside of my immediate family. This journey is very personal to me. What supports have been helpful to you? I still see my bariatric therapist as I feel I still need to talk through some things. I am hoping that this group will be helpful as well.

Hey all - my cousin had surgery Nov 1 last year - starting weight 240 now at 105 - where she lives you can’t get skin surgery for 2 years - she found these amazing products at https://www.maelyscosmetics.com and has been using 5 of them - she doesn’t need skin surgery now and she swears by these products. I ordered some last night &thought I’d share.

I used Dr.Robert Swartz in Richardson for breast reconstruction after rapid weight loss with fantastic results. I have had several friends use him for various post weight loss plastics done as well.

So, the whole being unable to drink water thing, it's not in my head like my partner wants to think lol. He thought I was just being difficult that I had to have some sort of flavor and sweetener because water is too "thin" and just "wrong".. I was feeling dehydrated the other day after being out longer than expected and I ran out of my drinks that I brought with me.. so I ducked into the dollar tree and the only thing I was allowed to have in the fridge case was a water. I had some lemonade packets buried somewhere in the car- but I took a swig of the water - not a gulp or anything and the second it reached my esophagus, it turned right back around. Instantly rejected. He got to witness it live and in person finally that my body is literally rejecting just plain water. It's like the wires have been crossed and I react physically like the water is poison. So then this man literally spent over a half an hour in a sweltering parking lot digging around for my lemonade packets! He's a believer now for sure. In other news.. I am now officially at my pre-severely traumatic event weight! 60lbs down! Lets go!!!! The pool has been GREAT exercise!

I appreciate your kind words. I just worry because I always hear that you get most of your weight loss in the first three months and I've only gone back to my 'normal' from about a year ago (280s-290s). When I weigh, sometimes I see the weight even go up by a pound (like this morning). Meanwhile, I used online calculators to estimate weight loss and they kept saying I should be losing like 40-50 pounds during the first three months and so I worry about 'wasting' this apparently golden period of weight loss.

Update: 13 days preop Pain: None Energy: Getting better daily. Exercise: Just walking Protein: 60+ grams a day. Fluids: 64+ oz a day. Supplements: Baratric advantage 2 calcium chews & 1 multi vitamin w/iron. Weight lose: 22 pounds

lol no. If you look at my signature, you can see my weight loss progression. And my username lets you know I had a sleeve and revised it to a bypass

I'm going to try and keep this from being too long, but there's so much to say!!! First I'll start with my newest NSVs. I'm officially in a size 18 clothes (from my original size 30), size 10 shoes (from my original size 11), size 6 1/2 ring (from my original size 10), 18" chain on a necklace (from my original 24" chain), and 2x jacket (from my original 4-5x). I can now comfortably fit on a massage table without fear of it creaking or breaking. I can now ride a bike because I'm within the weight limit. I now am able to hit my favorite thrift stores and walk out with seriously cute clothes that look nice, sit well on me, and actually fit comfortably!! My asthma is almost completely gone (I only have it when I get super sick now instead of all the time). My blood work came back and my hormone levels are almost in the normal range (I have PCOS) and my cysts that completely COVERED both ovaries are totally gone (without having taken any meds or done any hormone therapies!!) I did a 6 mile hike this past weekend with my son. I am completely pain free and am able to go full on beast mode with my workouts again. I can go up 5 flights of stairs before I need to stop and rest. Now for my new chapter in life and old dreams becoming new again. So years ago, I wanted to become a nurse. I completed all of the academics with a 4.0, aced all the labs, but couldn't do any of the clinicals because I couldn't do all the walking, I was 400 pounds, and my health/joints/back were way too bad. So I gave up on it. Then about 2 years later, I thought "well, maybe I can be a medical assistant. Surely THAT'S not as hard" and once again, I couldn't do the externship because I couldn't do the physical stuff. So I went into other areas for work, ballooned up to 421 pounds, worked remotely, and made good money. I loved what i did, but there was always a part of me that regretted not being able to go into the medical field. That was my heart's desire. So fast forward to now. I'm between jobs and miserable. I had to stop working because of all my complications from my first surgery. Now that I've been cleared, I can't get hired anywhere. So I decided that now is a great time to go back to my dream of working in the medical field. So on Sept 5th, I start school to become a certified pediatric oncology medical assistant. Most of my previous credits transfer over, so I only have about 6 months of academics to do and then the externship. Then I sit for my certification exam and then I get to finally FINALLY do what I've always wanted to do. By my 46th birthday next June, I should be right where I want to be, doing what I want to do, and hopefully at my goal weight. I'm sitting here in tears as I type this, because I thought this was something I would never see happen. I resigned myself to being morbidly obese, extremely unhealthy, and needing a cane to get around. I may not be at my goal weight (the weight comes off a lot slower with a revision, and also as your bmi gets smaller and you get closer to your goal) but I believe eventually I'll get there. But the things this surgery is giving to me, the dreams I can live out, the health and wellness and years of my life I'm getting back..... it was all worth it. The complications, the uncertainty, the pain and healing and stalls.... all completely worth it. We all start this journey wanting the numbers on the scale to go down. But there's SO MUCH MORE this surgery gives you. I will never, ever regret my decision. Never.

Based on a weight loss of 32 pounds in 9 weeks, that is an average weekly loss of 3.5 pounds. Excellent. I average a 2-pound loss a week and completely happy with it. The consistent downward trend I see on the scale is exciting to watch. Especially after years of failed dieting. If you must weigh daily, add up each day's weight for a week, then divide by how many days you stepped on the scale. Then compare week by week. I did this method years ago since this helps factor in water weight fluctuations. which can cause up to 5 pounds of variation daily, depending on sodium intake and menstrual cycles. I weigh once a week now and let my RENPHO smart scale do the math for me. It also takes bodyfat percentage which to me is a more important measurement as compared to the daily ups and downs of those weight scale numbers. Also, a stall here or there is to be expected while our bodies readjust but I'll take it. GL and congrats on your recent WLS @DustyRecording

Yes, 32lbs is a good loss over two months. There’ll always be people who lose more/lose faster while others lose more slowly & there’s nothing wrong with either way. Yes stalls can be frustrating but they are an important part of your weight loss. It’s when your body takes stock of the changes you’ve made (weight loss, reduced food intake, increased activity, etc.). Think of it as your body being stressed by these changes. Your body then resets things like your digestive hormones, metabolic rate etc. so it can better manage your new needs. Your stall will end when your body is ready to move forward again & they usually last 1-3 weeks on average. Leave the scales for a few days or reduce how often you weigh yourself. Take some body measurements as some say the scales don’t move but their body is still getting smaller.

My surgery was on August 15 and my weight loss has been super slow too. I’m following the plan to the . Isopure protein drinks 1-2 premeir protein drinks and 64oz of water a day. My starting weight was 210 and I’m barely at 197 now. Maybe some of us lose more slowly at different stages. I agree though, that blended meals like the one mentioned in the original posting is way soon to try a meal and sounds too heavy for a bariatric patient… at least this early on.

Thank you for clarifying and for reminding me about water weight. Yesterday my scale told me I had gained 4 pounds. I couldn’t figure it out, until I remembered that I had been receiving IV fluids for almost 48 hours when I was in the hospital (not surgery-related).

Hi Penny, I ended up with low potassium after surgery and had to stay in the hospital on those awful beds and few extra days and then told to go see my primary care doc, who is great. Love my PCP. Eating is hard - just had chicken salad puree for lunch - it's all I can do to stomach it. Kind of gross. I hope you can get your thyroid under control and soon. I would think it would play a big part in weight loss. I only feel better when I drink my protein shakes otherwise I have no brain function nor energy. I actually felt good yesterday with extra energy, I was shocked. Today I'm a bit laggy because for whatever reason I'm not longer getting past 5 or 6 hours of sleep at night. I'm lucky because at 66, I'm retired and my hubby is very neat so there isn't much demand on me. I am trying to get back into crafting but that's hardly demanding lol. I have a end of Nov show to build stock for. I can take my time. Wishing you well and not to hard of days at work. Just think a year from now we'll be a lot smaller and for me new knees!!!

Peggy Anne, I feel your pain. I'm supposed to move from pureed to more soft foods this week. I have stalled in my weight loss but I also have a thyroid issue now apparently. My dr did a blood check last week and my t4free is low but I quit my Levothyroxine at the time of the surgery bc they told me the thyroid was too high at that point...smh. For the last week I've been so tired I can barely walk, and then I developed a rash on the thyroid area of my neck and other thyroid symptoms so I started the meds back a couple of days ago but they still haven't helped. I called the nurse at my surgeon's office to ask if they had seen my results (i got them the next day) and she said basically she could make me an appointment but that really isn't their issue? I guess she wanted me to see my primary care dr but since I don't actually HAVE A REGULAR DR I told her I'm seeing my nephrologist tomorrow and I'd see if he could tell me what to do. I'm kind of like Why am I following up with the surgeon at all bc apparently if there is an issue, he won't handle it so I'm going to get labs done and sent to him to tell me to see a regular dr.???? About your meatballs....I had 1/4 lb of ground beef I cooked w./brown gravy and put over some mashed potatoes that stayed down so I took out a 1 lb pack of 12 frozen, pre-made meatballs last night that I thought I'd cook down in some spaghetti sauce. Didn't consider adding cheese but I thought I'd cook meatballs in the air fryer and then drain well and add to some store bought sauce. I am missing vegetables, carbs too like rice, breads, potatoes, etc. but the veg is almost a craving since I haven't had anything green in 30 days. I'm maybe eating 2-3 times a day, I also tried a piece of baked tilapia with butter and seasonings that stayed down well with no issues. It seems anything without a sauce or gravy causes issues, nothing too dry. Other than that I seem to be progressing along in the healing up process. Now if I can just get the strength back and walk across the room ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ:)

So I got my surgery on June 22nd - about nine weeks ago. I am 5'8", 35F, and started out at 320, I'm currently 288 for a loss of 32 pounds over about two months. Is that okay? For the last week or so, I've had a really rough stall and barely been losing anything. Some days I'll even gain a pound. This is my second stall. I normally eat between 600 and 1000 calories (mostly about 800) and almost entirely protein really. Is there an issue with me? Is my weight loss rate okay or is it too slow? I feel like I should have lost like 50 pounds by now. What about this stall?