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I posted on this EXACT question 2 days ago: Now, with greater experience, and most than 1 year post-op, I feel I can elaborate a bit more. I would STRONGLY advise against drinking ANY alcohol so early after surgery!!!!! Alcohol dehydrates your body. At the moment, your everyday battle is staying hydrated and allowing your surgical site to heal. The lime in the margarita will likely irritate your stomach lining, causing great discomfort. The alcohol will get you drunk VERY fast in VERY small quantities, and you will not be in good control of your decision making regarding other foods, which could lead you to make dangerous decisions around what is safe to eat so early on. Feel free to go out with your friends, but take on the role of designated driver (if you don't want them to know WHY you're not drinking), or just tell them you are staying away from alcohol for a while because it conflicts with some meds or supplements you're taking. Of course that all assumes they don't know about your surgery. If they know, tell them the truth! Your surgeon and nutritionist have strongly advised....NO DRINKING for min. 6 months post-op. You surgeon may not have spelled that out to you (though hopefully it was discussed). The physical effects of alcohol are bad, but the psychological possibilities of developing a new dependency or addiction (alcohol vs food) are very real and serious and worse than the hangover and illness the booze might temporarily cause you. Even if the addiction part is not "in play" here, the possibility of your having less control of your decision regarding food at the concert is still very real if you've been drinking. You really can't afford to slip up and eat the wrong thing this early post-op. It could have serious repercussions and land you in the hospital with a leak or complication you could have easily avoided. You made a smart choice with this surgery. Keep up the good choices and stay away from alcohol until you're better healed and in a more normal eating/drinking routine.

When you researched and prepped for VSG what did your surgeon and NUT tell you about consuming alcohol?

I had my first alcoholic beverage 6weeks post op. WARNING, alcohol takes affect much quicker now. Pre op I could easily have 6-8shots before getting buzzed. At 6weeks 2shots & I was walking crooked. And it was a roller coaster ride. I'd be drunk 1 minute then a few minutes later feel nothing then buzzed again with nothing more to drink. It was crazy. Enjoy yourself, but even if you feel completely sober, do not drive,

Because use of tobacco and alcohol is a CHOICE and I am not going to shed a tear over those who willingly and knowingly take part in an activity that is known to cause death or disease. My priorities are perfect where they are and I am right in their order. And I think the anti-tobacco forces have done a great job against the tobacco industry. And with education. Fewer people smoke. Non-smokers rightfully demand not to be exposed to second hand smoke. Smokers are now piranhas. Not welcome where they used to be (restaurants, workplaces, etc). Thankfully. And lawsuits against the tobacco industry have been successful in many cases. Now it's time to take on the big health insurance industry. And we will win in the end. It's going to happen.

You can make your own refreezable ice pack with a gallon freezer bag. Fill it with 3 cups of water and 1 cup of rubbing alcohol and then just put it in the freezer. Make two so you can always have one ready to go while you are using the other one.

What Your Doctor Can’t Tell You If you are considering bariatric surgery, you’ve probably done some research. You may have looked up “gastric bypass” on the internet, read some blogs, or perhaps you’ve gone so far as to discuss the possibilities with your doctor. You may have a decent grasp of the physical side of this surgery. But there are some things even the best surgeon can’t tell you. I’m talking about the emotional side of taking this life-changing step. The emotional roller coaster of trying and failing to lose weight does not disappear when you decide to use bariatric surgery to get control of your life. But, it does become easier when you know what to expect, and when you see that you are not alone. I speak with authority on the subject of bariatric surgery and the emotional struggle that goes with it — I’ve been there. Seven years ago, I had a gastric bypass. This process took me from being barely able to function to living a magnificent life as an authentic and productive person. But it wasn’t a walk in the park. As a person who has been through the surgery personally, and as a clinician (I am a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist) I bring deep experience to this subject. And I’m anxious to share what I learned. I want to make it clear up front that I am speaking as a clinician and someone who has been through weight loss surgery and the difficult recovery process — I am not a nutritionist or medical practitioner. The full tale of my own personal journey is recorded in my book Recovering My Life: A Personal Bariatric Story and in videos and Facebook posts I recorded during and after my surgery. I began emotional eating as a response to childhood trauma. And, though I had dieted over and over again since high school, I weighed over 200 pounds at the birth of my second child. At that point, my medical problems included sleep apnea, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and hypoglycemia (low blood sugar). By the time my third child was born, I was pre-diabetic, with gestational diabetes. Many days, I was too tired from sleep apnea to even get out of bed. I could barely take care of my kids, and I felt like the worst mom on the planet. Fighting My Way Through I had always thought only slackers had weight loss surgery. But when a friend had a gastric bypass, she convinced me that, for people with weight loss resistance, this was a good option. I consulted my doctor. He approved, and I began fighting my way back to health. And it was a battle. I made mistakes, but I learned from them, and I persevered. Today, I have maintained my weight loss, and I am healthy. I am a better mom to my kids, and I have a thriving group practice and run a nonprofit foundation I created to assist people in our community to heal the brokenness in their lives. And I met and married my second husband and have a great marriage. If you’re thinking about bariatric surgery, or if you’ve already had a procedure done, it’s important to move forward with all the information you need — including the physical and emotional ups and downs. My recovery was a difficult journey, but I would do it again a million times over. Knowing what I know now wouldn’t eliminate the challenges I had to overcome before and after surgery. But, it would make the whole thing less scary. That’s what I hope my story does for you — help you avoid the mistakes I made and feel more confident in your success. Understanding Weight Loss Struggles & Bariatric Surgery Causes of Morbid Obesity What is Bariatric Surgery? Getting Ready for Surgery Mental & Emotional Preparation Advocating for Yourself After Surgery is Approved Building Support Planning Pre-Surgery Weight Loss What You Will Need Immediately After Surgery In the Hospital The First Few Days at Home Ongoing Recovery Physical Issues Emotional Issues Other Issues Potential Issues After Weight-Loss Surgery Emotional Challenges Health Problems Relationships Understanding Weight Loss Struggles & Bariatric Surgery Why Do People End Up Morbidly Obese Well-meaning acquaintances, friends, and relatives may suggest that you’re “taking the easy way out” by pursuing bariatric surgery. They can make you feel guilty for even considering this as a last resort. Why can’t you just lose the weight on your own? Genetic predisposition. Some are genetically predisposed to gain weight, even when they exercise, even when they try to diet. Certain hormone imbalances and disorders can also make it hard to stay at a healthy weight. Emotional eating. The barrier that keeps most morbidly obese people from losing weight is that our eating is connected with our emotions. Early on, many of us learned to use food as a way to cope. Food for us is not just fuel; it’s the way we deal with life’s problems and blows. Regardless of the particular cause, some of us have been on one diet or another all our lives. We have lost the same 50, 70, or 100 pounds over and over. In fact, our attempts to lose weight have made us worse off. Along with the health effects of too much weight, we carry the shame of failure and frustration. Weight and Your Wellbeing The physical health problems associated with obesity are many and serious: high cholesterol, high blood pressure, acid reflux, gall bladder disease, congestive heart failure. Type two diabetes, hypoglycemia, asthma, sleep apnea and other sleep problems, fertility problems, arthritis, lack of energy. Knee and back pain, gout, migraines, psychosocial stress. Even scarier: liver disease, increased risk of cancer, risk of stroke, and earlier death. Associated emotional problems that stem from these conditions can also make it harder to overcome them. For example, you may be struggling with depression, anxiety, and guilt. Sometimes, the biggest problem we have to face is the low self-esteem that goes along with being the biggest person in the room. What Is Bariatric Surgery? Bariatric surgery is not a cosmetic procedure. We may hope to look better after losing weight, but the best reasons for undergoing this major surgery are to extend and improve our lives. The common term for bariatric surgery is “weight-loss surgery.” It means any surgical procedure on the stomach or intestines that aims at weight loss. Doctors have been performing these surgeries since the 1950s, with a good success rate. The most common procedures are lap band, with a success rate of 47%; gastric sleeve, with a success rate of 80%; and gastric bypass, which has an 85% success rate. Another procedure, duodenal switch, has a success rate of 95%, but is more complicated and less common in the U.S. These procedures support weight loss while requiring lifestyle changes. Drastic weight loss can motivate you to keep on the road to better health. Whichever procedure you choose, pre- and post-operative education is key to developing lasting, healthy habits. Getting Ready for Surgery Mentally and Emotionally Preparing Convincing others — and yourself — this is the best solution Your first job is to conquer your own hesitance about weight-loss surgery. Even asking about it takes courage. Then, when you’ve reached the point of seriously considering it, you need to be prepared for a long haul. You will need to get lots of people on board with your decision. First, your family — maybe not extended family, but certainly the people you live with day to day. Next, you need your doctor to approve your decision. No matter how much you hate to get weighed, you will need a referral from your primary physician. And, you need to convince your insurance carrier that bariatric surgery is necessary for your health and to prolong your life. Navigating Relief and Fear You will probably feel a profound sense of relief just to know there’s a solution to obesity- related health problems. But along with that relief comes worry. It’s major surgery. Things could go very wrong. You might even die. Will having surgery be worth it? What if you can’t get the weight off during those post-surgery months? What if you can’t keep it off and all this trouble and pain is for nothing? After all, you’ve tried and tried to lose weight and it hasn’t worked — or only worked for a short time. Then there’s having to consult with medical personnel and, even worse, insurance representatives, to advocate for yourself. You’ll have to talk about your weight, which means confronting the shame that goes with it. You may worry that people will think you’re weak — that you’re taking the easy way out. How do you overcome that prejudice? Especially since part of you still shares it. Overcoming Resistance And what about all those hoops you have to jump through? You have to have at least six months of records showing your weight on a regular basis and detailing your attempts to lose it. When you can’t bear the sight of your own body, much less the weight on the scale, how are you going to face that challenge? Your research, from articles to videos, shows people who’ve had bariatric surgery eating impossibly small portions. You hear about all the restrictions ahead: first, a liquid diet; then mashed food; then, even when you get back to “normal,” ongoing restrictions, such as not drinking with meals. How will you ever be able to eat normally again — how will you ever be able to eat out? These are mental challenges it won’t be easy to meet. But if you want to be well again, if you want a long, productive life, it is possible to work through them. Advocating for Yourself I was fortunate that my primary care physician was willing to support my bariatric surgery decision from the beginning. But you may have to work to convince your medical advisor that this route is good for you. Advocating for yourself isn’t easy, especially if, like most of us who suffer from morbid obesity, you don’t like calling attention to yourself and your weight. To succeed, you must learn how to speak up for yourself. Here are some suggestions. Decide what you want. Believe in yourself! Know the facts. Educate yourself about bariatric surgery and potential issues. Plan. You need a strategy for recovery and ongoing lifestyle changes. Gather support. It’s helpful to have family, friends, and people who have similar issues on your side. Target your efforts. Find the best medical practitioner. Find the right person at your insurance company to plead your case to. Express yourself clearly. Tell doctors and insurance agents that you are interested in surgery and why you feel you need it. Stick to the point, and don’t give up if they say “no.” It may help to role play scenarios with a friend or family member who supports your decision. Assert yourself, but don’t lose your temper. Respect the rights of others, but ask for what you need, and then listen. Finally, don’t give up. Be firm and persistent. Follow through on what you promise. (Those six months of weight-loss records, for example.) After Surgery Is Approved You’ve made the decision to have bariatric surgery. You’re both excited and scared about taking this serious step toward improving your health and your life, but you’re going to do it. Now you need to build your support system. Nobody goes through such a major life change, such a serious physical challenge, without help. Find Your Team Choosing the right people to support you on your journey is one of the most important decisions you have to make. You will need to depend on family, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers who have gone through this experience before you. The most important quality to look for in your team is respect and support for your decision. You will need help with ordinary tasks and responsibilities while you are undergoing and recovering from surgery. A few needs: Someone to care for your children and pets while you’re in the hospital and perhaps during recovery at home Help cooking meals and cleaning the house Someone to accompany you to the hospital and be your advocate when you can’t do that yourself Help dealing with the inevitable emotions and stresses of major surgery and a major lifestyle change First, you have to overcome your reluctance to ask for help. Then, you have to reach out. Share your needs with family and friends who are sympathetic to your goals. If they’re not on board, you don’t have time for them right now. If it feels right to you, you can use social media to reach out. Contact your church, work friends, fellow hobbyists, and people you’ve come to know in other ways. Trust that there will be someone who can help. Be Informed and Follow Your Doctor’s Advice Use the resources available through your medical advisors. Seek out a sympathetic nurse. A therapist can help you deal with the emotional consequences of surgery and also the issues that led to your obesity in the first place. If you don’t have a therapist, maybe it’s time to make that connection. Find a good therapy group. And above all, follow your doctor’s advice! Learn as much as you can about what will be happening to your body and mind, but trust the experts. Plan for an Extended Recovery Your time in the hospital may be only three to four days, but it will take longer for you to feel “recovered.” The period (about nine months) when you are relearning how to eat and coming to terms with the smaller size of your stomach is crucial to your long-term success. There will be lots of ups and downs. Be ready for a long road to full recovery. Having support from friends and family is important, but this is the time to get involved with a support group. Being with others going through the same experience can give you the perspective you need to keep going. Even if your physical recovery is swift and relatively painless, you will have to learn how to deal with the changes in your life. If, as with many, food has been the way you deal with past trauma, uncomfortable feelings, your need for independence, or any other of life’s problems, you no longer can depend on that comfort. If food has been your addiction, you now have to kick the addictive response to it. There will be setbacks. You need to be prepared to bounce back from them. Lose Weight Before Surgery Your bariatric surgeon is likely to require you follow a weight-loss plan for a number of months (six is common) before surgery. The reasons: to make sure you really are committed to your goal of losing the excess weight, and to help you be as healthy as possible going into surgery. This can be a frustrating time. You’ve tried so many diets and exercise programs before, and none have worked. You hate thinking about your weight, and your program requires you weigh yourself daily and keep records of your weight, food intake, and exercise. You’ve made a major decision and are anxious to get it over with. But again, following your doctor’s advice is the shortest and best way to reach your goal, no matter how frustrating it feels. Confront Your Fears To make this transformative decision, you’ve already had to overcome lots of fears. Some of your fears involve others’ opinions. “What will people think?” Some arise from self-doubt. “Am I being selfish?” These are not frivolous concerns. Believe in yourself and face them. Your decision to take care of your health so that you can be there for your loved ones is a good one. Trust in yourself. Another very real fear is the fear that anyone feels when they are about to undergo major surgery. You could die. This is not a frivolous thing. It’s serious. But the vast majority of people who have surgery don’t die from it. So, face your fear realistically. At last, the big day is here. Your surgery is performed. You wake up in the hospital. Are you a different person? Is it all over now? Not yet. The journey of recovery has begun, and it will take resilience. Immediately After Surgery In the Hospital If you have built your support team, you will have fewer worries going in. Your family and home responsibilities are covered, and you have people to support you in the hospital and after you return home. But that doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges. During the initial stages of recovery, hospital staff will be checking your blood pressure, oxygen levels, and more. You may feel as though you are always being poked and prodded at, with little privacy. Thankfully, this stage doesn’t last forever, Your doctors will advise you about the physical challenges that may follow bariatric surgery: constipation, dumping syndrome (nausea, vomiting, and weakness caused by eating high sugar meals, sodas, and fruit juices), possible infection of the wound, and possible leaks in the new connections. But medical advice may not give you the information you need about the emotional side effects. One consequence of the surgery I noticed immediately: I no longer felt like eating. My hunger hormones were gone for a period of time. I had to force myself to eat, and I felt weak. Others report that they felt hungry during the post-op period while on a liquid diet. Hungry or not, a liquid diet can be a source of emotional stress. Be aware that different people react in different ways. The important thing is to keep following your medical and nutritional advice and trust that, in time, you’ll be feeling more normal. Another potential problem is “food grief.” Food has a special meaning for people who suffer from morbid obesity, and “mourning for lost foods is a natural step in the re-birth process after weight loss surgery.” For a long time, maybe all our lives, food was our friend. We turned to it in celebration, in sadness, for comfort, for reward. Now, we can no longer turn to food. We have to find other ways to fill the void food once filled for us. Along with the pain associated with surgery comes the challenge of managing it. The pain medication you are given in the hospital may not work for you. Keep advocating for yourself until you find one that does. It may also take time to know exactly how much medication you need. Trust your doctor, but don’t be afraid to ask for a higher dose if you are in pain, or a lower dose if you are experiencing other unpleasant side effects. It’s worth reiterating here, I am not a nutritionist or medical practitioner. And, I am certainly not advocating for you to ignore your doctor’s advice. Rather, by telling your doctor how you feel when you’re on pain medication, he or she may be able to transition you to a more effective medicine or dosage in a safe, supervised way. Other challenges: meeting the medical requirements for discharge from the hospital and meeting your own fears and expectations. Will you be ready to be sent home? How will you manage after you get there? Your First Few Days at Home Your first major challenge will be dealing with pain and managing your pain medication. If you’re like me, you will want to get off medication as soon as possible. But follow your doctor’s advice. Pain meds usually require tapering off. Quitting “cold turkey” is likely to cause withdrawal symptoms, such as feelings of anxiety or depression, trouble sleeping, headaches, night sweats, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. I made the mistake of not tapering off my pain meds and lived to regret it. You — and members of your family — might be appalled at how little you eat. You might worry about not getting enough of the right nutrition — protein, for example. The combination of pain, medication, and lack of hunger hormones can mean almost total loss of appetite. Feeling responsible for things at home may make you push yourself too hard, especially if loved ones need you. Preplanning for getting help during this early recovery period is important. You will need to have both physical and emotional support in place. Recognize that even though they care, some people won’t be able to help. But don’t be afraid to ask. Take baby steps. Your recovery has many facets: overcoming pain and regaining your physical strength are just the beginning. Emotional adjustment to the new circumstances of this life-changing step is major and ongoing. Therapist Lynne Routsong-Wiechers, herself a successful bariatric surgery patient, lists “Seven Steps to Improving Emotional Adjustments Post-Surgery” in her article, “Baby Steps — Emotional Adjustments to Weight-Loss Surgery.” Follow your doctor’s orders. Ask questions when you have them and express concerns, but trust your doctor’s recommendations and prioritize your physical health. Keep a journal. You can use this to keep track of the foods you eat, as well as whether or not you are emotionally eating, but you might also choose to express what you’re thinking and feeling. This will be a private record, just for you. Remember, you are more than your diet and weight. Write down realistic goals and expectations. Celebrate when you meet them! Reflect on the past. Remember why you decided to make this change, and honor how far you’ve come. Take plenty of photos and keep your old clothes. This will help you physically see your immense transformation. Call on that support team you’ve created. Look forward to living life to the fullest! Ongoing Recovery Physical Issues Even after you’ve conquered the first few days after surgery, the challenges go on. This early recovery stage can last from one to six weeks. The specifics vary with the particular procedure, but here’s a general outline of your physical recovery: Develop strategies to deal with these attacks: exercise, journaling, and deep breathing are a few suggestions. Seek help if your attacks are severe. Focus on One Part of Your Body You might find yourself focusing on one body part. For me, it was my double chin. I had lost inches from my waistline and was making good progress, but when I looked in the mirror and saw that same double chin, I felt like I was making no progress at all. This kind of body image distortion, if it becomes obsessive, can lead to Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), a mental health disorder. People with BDD can spend hours a day obsessing about their appearance. These obsessions and the low self-esteem that results can make them avoid social situations, have problems at work or school, or even lead to suicidal thoughts or suicide attempts. It’s important to seek help and support if you feel yourself becoming fixated. Remember that no body is perfect, and people are much more like to think about their own “flaws” than notice yours. Practice positive self-talk and try to replace thoughts about your body with something else, such as a new hobby or activity. Now that you’ve lost weight, a whole new world is open to you! Health Problems It’s not uncommon for patients to regain some weight after surgery, although it’s a myth that many patients regain all their lost weight. Regaining Weight Regaining even a small amount of weight can feed your fear. What if you stretch the pouch and end up gaining weight back or stalling your weight-loss? What if you have to go back to the hospital for something and you gain weight because of the treatment? About half of all bariatric surgery patients regain weight after two years. But the average regain is about 8% after reaching the lowest point, and total ten-year excess weight loss is still over 50%. The main reasons for regaining weight are: how much excess weight you carried before surgery, alcohol or drug abuse, lack of a support system, or having a psychological problem or food “addiction.” Realize that even if you regain some weight, you are still healthier than you were before surgery. Take steps to avoid the main reasons for weight gain. Be aware of the dangers of a substitute addiction to alcohol or drugs. Get yourself a support system and use it. Get treatment if you suspect you are overeating because of food addiction. Plateauing Don’t lose hope if you stop losing weight for a few days. These things happen. You can overcome the weight loss plateau. Your metabolism may have slowed because you couldn’t exercise after surgery. You can start losing weight again. Focus on getting the right amount and intensity of exercise. Track your heart rate. You should be exercising at 60 to 85% of your maximum heart rate (220 minus your age). Vary your exercise routine to keep yourself challenged. Be sure to drink enough water, and continue eating right. Complications I worried that something would get stuck in the very small connection between my stomach pouch and small intestine. Would I have to go to the emergency room? Could something else happen to me? As with all surgeries, there can be complications with bariatric surgery. But this surgery is very safe (99.8% survival rate). And less than 10% of patients have a complication. Though the list of complications is fairly long, most are not life-threatening (e.g., indigestion, diarrhea or constipation, nausea and vomiting, dumping syndrome). Some can be prevented by self-care. Stick to your bariatric diet, follow your doctor’s instructions, inform yourself about what to look for, and share your worries with your doctor. Sutures I had difficulty with sutures coming out before they were supposed to. Others have had infections at the wound site. Monitor the site of your surgery and consult your doctor if things aren’t going right. Hypoglycemia Hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) happens when after eating, a rise in blood sugar makes your body produce more insulin, which then lowers blood sugar. Unless it’s extreme, this can be managed by changes in your diet. Nutritional Deficiencies Common vitamin and mineral deficiencies among bariatric surgery patients are Vitamin B12, Folate and Zinc, iron, copper, Calcium, and Vitamin D. Potassium deficiency can also be a problem, causing nausea, cramping, and dry skin. Supplements may help. Consult your doctor and dietician. Dehydration The recommended daily intake of water — 64 ounces — may be hard to get down, particularly right after surgery. Eight cups sounds like a lot, but if you break it down to one-fourth cup every 15 minutes for eight of the twelve or so hours you are awake, it is manageable. There’s an app for reminding you when to drink at GetHYApp.com. Clothing Especially in the early weeks and months after surgery, when you are dropping weight fast, you may find you can’t find anything to wear. This may sound like a minor problem, but you might be caught off guard by how much you spend on new clothes as you lose weight rapidly. While you are changing sizes every week or two, you may want to find some ways to save money: Borrow clothes or shop at thrift stores. Shop your closet. Now’s the time to wear those too small items you just couldn’t part with when you were heavier. Don’t buy too much. Get exactly what you need until the next size change. Buy just a few practical basics and splurge on accessories. Don’t buy for the future. Clothes that fit and flatter now are better for your confidence. Alter. If you can’t alter your own clothes, find someone who can and get items altered as you lose weight. Most things can be taken in. Exchange Clothing. If you’re in a support group, consider swapping clothes with other group members. Relationships Social Life Your new body may allow you to make new decisions: to start dating or to go to the beach. But because your body image may not have caught up with the reality of your new body, you may still have the self-doubts you had before. Part of your mind still thinks the way you did before surgery. You may feel unattractive, even invisible. Inside, you still feel fat. Negative self-talk may still be your go-to response to interacting socially with other people. Counseling, a support group, and self-affirmations can help. Most importantly, give yourself credit for all you have accomplished. You’ve come a long way. Different Reactions Sad, but true. Not all of your friends and family will react positively to the new you. Old friends, even family members, may envy or resent your new look. Family, friends, and even strangers may have a range of reactions to the changes in you. Your children may support you, but carry a lot of anxiety, fearing that you may die. Some may become diet police, worried that you’ll regain the weight and ill health of your days of obesity. Some will trust you to know your own needs. Know that others’ reactions don’t mean anything about you. You are taking care of yourself, and that’s a good thing. Getting More Attention Now that you have lost weight, you are probably getting more attention. This may make you uncomfortable. Obesity goes with isolation. In fact, some people use their weight to keep from being in the spotlight. Being noticed may be flattering, but it can also be stressful. Jealousy If you’re married or in a relationship your significant other may be jealous of all the attention you’re getting from other people. Your spouse might fear that the new you might leave the relationship and so may try to sabotage your efforts to maintain your weight loss. Your overweight friends might be jealous in a different way. If monthly dinners out with your “foodie” friends were the main thing that kept you together, or if these friends are not sympathetic to your weight loss efforts, they may, consciously or unconsciously, sabotage you. Remember to surround yourself with people who support you. Don’t judge others who may be struggling, but don’t sacrifice your progress to please them. Guarding Against Judgment The different way strangers and acquaintances perceive you now may make you feel flattered, but also confused and even resentful. You may wonder — do these people like you for yourself, or are they just attracted to your new appearance? Would they have liked you before? People you don’t see every day may not recognize you. Others may make you feel that you’re being judged for your decision to have the surgery. You may be re-introducing yourself to one person and defending yourself to another. It’s understandable that you may be struggling with your sense of self. But, remember, you are worthy of kindness at any weight. Be your own best support. Honoring Your Accomplishment You can’t control the beliefs and behavior of other people, but you can be true to your goals and to yourself. Keep honoring your decision, your hard work, your determination, and your truly astonishing accomplishments. Whatever others say or imply, you are a brave and magnificent person, and you deserve a magnificent life. Embrace Your Future Bariatric surgery is a last-resort choice for losing weight that is killing you. Deciding to go ahead with it and working through all the barriers and difficulties is not for the faint of heart. But for those who choose to go forward, it can be life-saving in many ways. By arming yourself with information about what to expect, you can feel prepared to navigate the weight loss surgery process with greater confidence and ease. Keep coming back to this guide and check in with yourself at every step along the way. Before, immediately after, and long after surgery, remember these key points: Create a support system Take care of your body Believe in yourself No matter where you are in your surgery journey, you deserve the new life you have given yourself. Enjoy. Links https://asmbs.org/resources/estimate-of-bariatric-surgery-numbers https://obesitynewstoday.com/gastric-bypass-success-rate/ https://www.caroladkisson.com/books/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/feeling-hungry-less-than-a-week-after-gastric-bypass-surgery-is-this-normal.html http://www.boxingscene.com/weight-loss/54558.php https://www.consumerreports.org/health/avoid-withdrawal-symptoms-from-prescription-painkillers/ http://www.obesityaction.org/educational-resources/resource-articles-2/weight-loss-surgery/baby-steps-emotional-adjustments-after-weight-loss-surgery https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/bariatric-surgery-recovery.html#Support_Main https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/bariatric-surgery/basics/what-you-can-expect/prc-20019138 https://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/239270-joint-aches-and-pains/ http://www.mybariatriclife.org/chronic-fatigue-after-bariatric-surgery/ http://www.livestrong.com/article/456678-feeling-cold-all-the-time-after-a-gastric-bypass/ https://www.leaf.tv/articles/how-to-avoid-skin-problems-after-gastric-bypass/ https://www.webmd.com/diet/obesity/features/you-lost-weight-what-about-extra-skin#2 https://www.drdkim.net/ask-the-dietitian/understanding-hair-loss-after-bariatric-surgery/ http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ http://www.bmiut.com/mood-changes-bariatric-surgery/ https://www.njbariatriccenter.com/eating-out-after-weight-loss-surgery/ https://www.bariatriceating.com/2013/11/what-medications-are-off-limits-after-my-bariatric-surgery/ https://www.everydayhealth.com/weight/the-emotional-health-risks-of-bariatric-surgery.aspx http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ https://www.tijuanabariatrics.com/blog/2017/04/18/is-a-ketogenic-diet-safe-181655 https://www.ucsfhealth.org/education/dietary_guidelines_after_gastric_bypass/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/weight-gain-after-gastric-bypass.html#Diet-and-Life-After-Main http://www.yourbariatricsurgeryguide.com/psych-impact/ https://weightwise.com/avoid-body-image-distortion-weight-loss-surgery/ http://bariatrictimes.com/depression-after-bariatric-surgery-triggers-identification-treatment-and-prevention/ http://blog.riversidesurgicalweightloss.com/blog/manage-anxiety-after-surgery https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/related-illnesses/other-related-conditions/body-dysmorphic-disorder-bdd https://asmbs.org/patients/bariatric-surgery-misconceptions https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/weight-gain-after-gastric-bypass.html https://mybariatricsolutions.com/overcoming-and-preventing-the-weight-loss-plateau/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/complications-of-gastric-bypass-surgery.html#General_Safety-Main http://gethyapp.com/ https://weightwise.com/how-to-shop-for-clothes-after-weight-loss-surgery/ https://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/marriage-family-strangers-after-weight-loss-surgery.html

So Happy that my surgery is only 2-1/2 weeks away!!! I have been working on getting my house clean this week and today and man till today I didn't realize how much my weight holds me back. I did most of the cleaning this week and today I just swept the rug up in my hallway upstairs cause it's a low pile rug and I wanted to get all the fuzzy's up and my vacuum is a POS, so I did that and it's only about 15 feet long then swept it down the stairs which there is only 10 stairs with a little landing in the middle and I am sweating like no other and now I just want to take a shower cause I feel like crap? So I don't think I am getting much more done today. I can't believe just how far I let myself get, and how much it holds me back. I am lucky I have a wonderful boyfriend that will help me out with the house cleaning and keeping it up, and my kids well they will when they realize what I just went through after the surgery. They don't know yet, cause I don't want them telling their father or mostly their fathers girlfriend, she thinks I take drugs to loose weight, but i am the biggest anti drug person I know. I don't drink alcohol, and I definitely don't do drugs. So I have decided that I won't tell them till the day before. I just got my paperwork in from the doctor yesterday confirming my date and time for my appointments coming up and I am super excited for all this to begin. I have to go to the hospital where I am having the procedure done on the 4th at 9:30 and then to my doctors right after I am done there, then start my 2 week diet the 5th, and then on the 19th I need to be at the hospital at 6 am for a 9 am surgery. I am going to have to figure out what I will do with my kids that morning so that I can get them off to school, but I am sure my mom will help me out. So I am ready and nothing is stopping me now. I hope that everyone that has their surgeries coming up in march and in the future good luck!!! I know much this means to me, so I know how much this must mean to you too!!

Every surgeon is different. My program is avoid for 6 months. Definitely not this early on. I was told for the first 3 months to stick to the the program while the stomach is still healing. Your body reacts differently to alcohol post Surgery.

Most surgeons are different, but the minimum is usually 6 months. My surgeon's office was 1 year. Alcohol hits you harder after surgery and is also empty calories. They also worry that food addiction will transfer to alcohol as it's very common in WLS patients. So maybe ask your surgeons office what their guidelines are and decide from there.

I'm sorry, but the above is terrible counsel. A 50 ml shot of vodka is 110 calories (for Americans, a standard 1.5 oz. shot of vodka is 96 calories.) 8 shots of vodka is nearly 900 calories just in alcohol, completely empty of nutrition. Most post-surgery diets ask you to stay under 1000 calories a day.

I'm on my two week pre-op too and it's the same. I can eat mostly normal, just no carbs, alcohol, or high fat foods. Sent from my Pixel 3 using Tapatalk

LOL It's nice they are getting on board, even if it is over concern for your "last meals". I made sure I had korean bbq before surgery since that's the only meal I love that actually requires stomach capacity to enjoy! My "last" meal though was a few slices of really good pizza and a cocktail, since DS patients have to eat low carb post surgery and I knew I wouldn't be eating pizza like that again. And my surgeon says no alcohol for a year... Enjoy your food celebration before your pre-op diet!!

So what about beer, wine or other alcoholic beverages--say tequlia sunrise, for example??? Can you have any???

Having dealt with a drug addicted brother for two decades and seeing the devastation that it causes to family and friends, I am all for voluntary sterilization. When you see infants detoxing from heroin and other drugs and see the effects... developmental delays, fetal alcohol syndrome, AIDS, etc., it's a VERY GOOD thing when addicts are offered the opportunity to not procreate.

Pat, funny you should mention alcoholism. I've been sober for 19 years. Addicted to food and shopping, but not using alcohol anymore. I have been comparing this in my mind to alcoholism and recovery. The lapband is my antibuse. Right now I am in detox. After my banding I will be in rehab. Once I can eat solids, I will be out of rehab and into the scary real world. Thank God for my antibuse, because if I use my "drug" I'll get really sick! If I start eating around my band it means I stopped taking my antibuse so that I could fall off the wagon intentionally. This board is my meeting. You guys are my support group. Jaime, I'm glad you shared what you did. I wasn't thinking it would be so hard right away. I'm still on the pre-op. It's not being hungry that bothers me. That passes. It's the emptiness. I feel empty. When I feel stuffed then I am a little numbed. I remember telling a co-worker a long time ago, "I don't care what happens during the day. As long as I can go home, sit in my chair and eat my Oreos and Diet Coke, I'll be happy." I had a very stressful job, but I got through the day by thinking of the moment that I would sit in my comfy chair, all alone, with my stack of cookies and my huge Diet Coke. That would make everything all right. Is there a section on this board that deals specifically with sharing these kinds of issues?

I'm happy for your. It's something that a lot of people don't realize that boys have just as many of those issues as girls do these days. My daughter will be 20 next month and is doing a lot better and now that she's had the gastric bypass I'm hoping she'll do well but I still worry and worry about replacing food with alcohol still, in the back of my mind. Anyway it's good to talk about and actually brought out some of those old tears talking to you about her time in the psych hospital. And now someone just started a thread on adult children of alcoholic parents and now I have another fun one to share in, take care Nancy!

I can remember having a second helping of chili with beans and rice, when I was seven, I think, and my mother saying, “Your friends are probably already in bed.” <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p> She died when I was nine, and I bought my first box of cookies soon after that, for twenty-five cents. And that’s when my love affair with cookies began. But I was a think child, even though I’d buy bags of cookies whenever I could, which wasn’t often, because I didn’t get an allowance. My father was an alcoholic, and I stuffed myself when I could, because it felt good. <o:p></o:p> I moved in with one of my older sisters during my senior year in high school, and had three meals a day, something I didn’t always have at my father’s. But my weight began creeping up when I was in my twenties. I remember weighing 209 pounds, and going to a Gloria Marshall figure salon. I lost thirty pounds, maybe thirty-five, because I was 174, and my sister commented on how little I looked. That was the last time I saw the one hundreds. The next time I became conscious of my weight was when it was 290, and I joined Overeaters Anonymous. I went down to 232 and back up to 286, and had a hysterectomy, when I went down to 263. I know there are other times I yo-yoed, but this is the basic pattern. <o:p></o:p> About four years ago, I began working with a personal trainer, but I’m not sure how much weight I’ve lost, because I never allowed myself to be weighed until I began considering getting the lap band. <o:p></o:p> I know a lot of my eating is because of my family life, where I experienced a lot of physical and emotional neglect. My brother called me Fatso, even though I wasn’t big, but like so many, I believed him. One of my sisters called me Brahma, and I always thought it was because she thought I was fat, too, but she told me recently it was because of the way I walked so fast <o:p></o:p> The last time I went to my doctor’s office, I didn’t ask how much I weigh, but it’s got to be over 331. Guess I just didn’t want to know. <o:p></o:p> Oh, did I mention that, like so many others, I too snuck food, even when I went to Gloria Marshall, which I did twice, when I was in OA, I ate sugar free stuff, but still had large portions? Denying myself the sweets only caused me to sneak on weekends or hide food in my closet.

I can tell you that my morbid obesity comes from many factors. The main one is family atmosphere. My first memory of life was being sexually molested along with my baby brother. My parents were teenagers and not very interested in responsibility. The molestation continued for 11 years. I sought the approval and attention of a 30 year old at 16 and became pregnant the first time. I was always at work to pay for my baby and my mom gave him to my older sister at 17. I became a heavy drinker and married at 18. I was by then a full fledged alcoholic. Three days before my 20th birthday I became sober through AA. I spent my 20's in therapy. It helped me tremendously! I gave birth to my second son at 25 and still continued with therapy until the age of 29. I continued to smoke as a crutch until I reached 36. On 4-01-2000 I quit smoking and by 8-29-2005, the day of banding, I went from 155 or so to 280 lbs. Eating had always been my source of comfort, but I was always able to keep within 20lb.s or so of a normal weight. This was only achieved through starvation, diet pills, coffee and many cigarettes. My mom always offered food as a source of comfort and it became a way of life early on. My dad was not in the picture and my step fatheres were alcoholics. My younger brother and sister are both practicing alcoholics and not interested in quitting. I am the outsider because I chose a different life and because I attend church regularly. They will come to me for help, but only on their terms and I don't hear from them unless they need something. It breaks my heart because they will probably die in their addictions. They and my mom are obese as well. My father died 3 years ago from a massive heart attack. He was 58 years old, obese and a heavy smoker and drinker. I had not seen him in 10 years. Fathering was not of interest to him. My brother still wants his approval-sad huh? Well I guess I have cried a river, thanks for listening-or reading. I love all of you, you are all great! Rose in Texas not a victim anymore! banded 8-29-2005

Here’s my story Weighed 3 lbs 11 oz at birth, My Mom thought I looked like a wet rat (I was her 2<SUP>nd</SUP> child) my Dad thought I was beautiful. <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Looking back at baby pic’s I was a normal size kid – but must have started gaining weight in grade school because I remember my Mom taking me to the family doctor to be put on a diet. Must have been 4<SUP>th</SUP> grade. Doctor gave me liquid medicine (must have been some sort of diet pill in liquid form) - I remember losing weight and I don’t know how much I weighted then. I do remember being in 8<SUP>th</SUP> grade weighting 165 and I was considered the fat girl (God how I wish I weighted 165 now) Remember my Mom telling everyone – can you believed she weighed 3 lbs at birth – look at that pretty face. That’s when I started hiding my eating. My Mom was always watching what I ate. I remember coming home from school changing in to my play clothes and stuffing saltines in my pockets and going outside to eat. At our house we had plenty of food – but no one had seconds, I think I was the only one who wanted them. Remember eating what was left over out of the pots as I was doing dishes.<O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Issue’s that may have contributed to my looking to food for comfort – Found my Mother when I was 5 – after she tried to commit suicide. Yes, my Mom had mental issues and was mean to us girls (me & my sister) the boys she loved. My Dad told me once when I was older that my Mom was jealous of me. My Mom could be very abusive and was a mean drunk – On the outside we looked like the Father Knows Best Family (yes I am dating myself ;o) but on the inside of that house there was drama. My Mom was the abuser – to me, my sister and my Father (yes the wife was the abuser not the husband) both verbal & physical <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Then the summer between 8<SUP>th</SUP> grade and my freshman year I lost 30 lbs without even trying – in fact after summer school would come home and eat tons of junk – but again I was a lot more active – walking to baseball games to meet the boys – to and from school.<O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> I weighed 130 when I was 16 and got pg with my Son. Gained 35 lbs during pregnancy and the Doctor kept telling me I was going to look like a whale – Well he gave me diet pills after the birth of my son and between not having $$$ for any extra food and those pills I lost the baby weight and in fact got down to 117. Stayed that way for years – didn’t have $$ for food and had an abusive boyfriend who always had me scared – and would degrade me - Remember Hot Pants – here I was weight 117 – and he told me I looked bad in those shorts. In fact all those yrs that I was skinny I never felt skinny and didn’t realize the body I had until I saw an old boyfriend who said “what happened to that great body you had” <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Well – got rid of that abusive guy – got a nice guy who was a tad chubby his self – and then the weight started back on and with in a yr gained 40 lb – then that boyfriend said I was fat and wouldn’t make love to me – so I went out and found one that would – Now at this time I was weighing about 160 (I’m 5’4). Thick but not fat… <O:p></O:p> Again would gain and lose gain & lose – really didn’t obsess about food too much – would love to eat a bowl of mash potatoes with tons of butter or burritos and sweets. <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Food is my drug of choice. I don’t do drugs or abuse alcohol. I used to be mostly a nighttime eater - could go all day with out eating – still can if I am out doing something (except at work – want to eat – but that’s the stress) But find that I do now eat during the day and watch out at night – I think I self medicate to sleep and I love to sleep on the weekends – I know you are going to say I am depressed – but I don’t feel depressed.. I think I do feel numb as I have read in some of these other post - I think I might be numb maybe that’s why I like the peace and quite of my life – My life is pretty good, I am divorced (which is find with me cuz I don’t need the drama) My 16 yr Grandson lives with me (who by the way is just shy of being anorexia) – I live in a nice house, drive a nice car – have no money issues. But I still EAT --- Eat – I am at my heaviest (last time around – before in my late 30’s 232 was my highest ) Now at 52 I am 240 and being menopausal it’s all over but now my tummy is the biggest it’s ever been)<O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> I eat because I Can, I eat because I Hate feeling Deprived, I eat when I’m Bored, I eat cuz it taste good – and get seconds or thirds (when I make something good) cuz I don’t taste the 1<SUP>st</SUP> serving – but by the 2<SUP>nd</SUP> serving it’s taking real good and I want more. And then after I go to bed it’s up again to eat more so I can go to sleep and then I wake up again and eat some more. –I don’t exercise – It’s too much effort to change clothes when I get home and go for a walk – it’s so much easier to change into my house dress and plop my fat ass in front of the TV.<O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Ok – so this got a little long – but it’s my history – I want to get banded and have been talking about it for a year now – but haven’t done anything about it. I think I am afraid to lose my friend FOOD… I have high blood pressure – my Dad had heart problems (my family all has a tendency to be on the heavy side – My Dad got real big after his divorce from my Mom (who did successed in killing herself when I was 15) My Brother who died had weight issues too – and my baby bro is most likely 280 my big sis really doesn’t have a weight issue – but what we all have in common is being night eaters) <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> I am here on this board looking into what to expect if I get banded – I don’t want to die, but why can’t I just take the 1<SUP>st</SUP> step and call the Bypass Doctor. Am I hiding behind my fat?? <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> I don’t like difficult things in my life and if it’s to difficult I won’t do it – I think that’s why I don’t even try anymore to diet. It’s just too hard – it is easier being fat. (Not really but you know what I mean) <O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Can I go to the surgeon directly – I have Blue Cross Ppo(California) I have done all the diets – Pills – Weight Watchers – Jenny Craig – Medifast – etc but none are recorded with my current Doctor.<O:p></O:p> <O:p></O:p> Well, my dinner is burning – and I wish I was as articulate as some other these other posters and maybe I gave too much info – but I NEED HELP – Skinny people don’t understand Fat people – they think all you have to do is stop eating – well if I could do that I wouldn’t be fat...:help: <O:p></O:p>

I was in shape until I graduated HS. I ran almost daily and lifted weights. I was a size six. I felt great. Then I went through a very difficult 7 years with my family. It completely fell apart. My dad left my mom, she tried to commit suicide, my dad went to treatment for alcoholism 3 x and some other ugly stuff. It was right at the same time that I began to live on my own and in college. I ate too much, ate out too often, used food and alcohol to cope with the stress of my family. I did not even notice how fast it was coming on. I recall buying bigger stuff but not really knowing how big I was. I was in denial. I quickly gained 100 lbs. I have then hovered at the same weight (give or take 20) for 7 years. However, I cannot make the needed changes long enough to have successful weight loss. So I guess I am fat because I turned food into a coping mechanism many years ago. I hope to change that on 5/22/12......

reif78: heck yeah that makes sense. I can't tell you how many times I wished I preferred alcohol or coke instead of food. At least with those things your dysfunction isn't so readily apparent. I'm actually not kidding which tells you a lot about why I'm fat. JSOTO: congratulations! You sound great and like you really have your head on right! It helps people like me read things like that from people like you!

:thumbup: TOTALLY ! Used to be not overweight in school, never was "skinny", but used to be "healthy" and a competitive swimmer. But since I started working fulltime, eat out more often, alcohol nights and got heartbroken.. :smile2: I lost balance in exercising & eating. When I feel hurt, the more I don't like to look at myself... I eat to find comfort. :thumbup: Until I realize it, I've lost myself. In a span of 5 years, gained from 130ish to 220lbs...

If the sadness and other symptoms of depression is long lasting, intense, or interferes with daily life (work, relationships, self care), you owe it to yourself to see a professional for an assessment. Think about it this way: if you were feeling bodily pain of the same duration and intensity, would you get it checked out? If so, then treat mental pain the same way. One thing I've thought of is what happens to people who use alcohol or drugs to cope (whether they have an addiction or not) and then stop using. The very lack of a major coping tool that was effective for sadness and anxiety (regardless that this was a tool that hurt in the big picture, it can be pretty dang effective for a while) can uncover existing mood problems or simply make every day stresses much harder to cope with until the person forms other coping methods. I think most people in cultures with abundant food use food to cope with stress, sadness, anxiety, etc and those morbidly obese probably more often or intensely than average. Learning new coping methods is a fairly easy problem to solve. Recovering from a mood disorder is usually a bit more difficult but depression is a very treatable problem through therapy and/ or medication.

This is not a study, only a recommendation by the ASMBS for certain surgery types and the introduction of certain foods during the post op diet phases. It is only an excerpt of a very lengthy article. I am not going to argue this point, everyone needs to do what they feel is best for them based upon their surgeon's and nutritionist's recommendations. There are polar opposite opinions by the medical professionals on carbonation stretching your stomach, so it is not something that they seem to agree upon. I guess err on the side of caution if you want to feel safe. This document is intended to provide an overview of the elements that are important to the nutritional care of the bariatric patient. It is not intended to serve as training, a statement of standardization, or scientific consensus. It should be viewed as an educational tool to increase awareness among medical professionals of the potential risk of nutritional deficiencies common to bariatric surgery patients. The goal of this document is to provide suggestions for conducting a nutrition assessment, education, supplementation, and follow-up care. These suggestions are not mandates and should be treated with common sense. When needed, exceptions should be made according to individual variations and the evaluation findings. It is intended to present a reasonable approach to patient nutrition care and at the same time allow for flexibility among individual practice-based protocols, procedures, and policies....... .....Similar to AGB and RYGB, programs offering DS/BPD procedures reported that the clear liquid diet phase is employed for one to two days after surgery. The full liquid phase was most commonly noted to last >10 to 14 days, while the pureed phase was reported to be >14 days. Most programs report that a ground texture phase is not utilized. The soft diet phase was reported to last >14 days. Finally, those programs offering DS/BPD most often reported advancing patients to a regular diet five to eight weeks after surgery. **Foods commonly restricted ** The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery members reported in the survey that patients were instructed to avoid or delay the introduction of several foods as noted in [Table 9](#tbl9). Research to support these clinical practices is limited, especially with regard to caffeine and carbonation. Practitioners might theorize that certain foods and beverages will cause gastric irritation, outlet obstruction, intolerance, delayed wound healing, or alter the weight loss course; however, much of the information is anecdotal and lacks empirical evidence. In addition, although practitioners recommend that patients avoid or delay the introduction of these foods, little information is known as to whether patients actually comply with these recommendations and whether those who do not comply have altered outcomes or clinical histories. One retrospective survey suggested that many patients are noncompliant with diet and exercise recommendations [[174]](#bib174). food type Recommendation Sugar, sugar-containing foods, concentrated sweets Avoid Carbonated beverages Avoid/delay fruit juice Avoid High-saturated fat, fried foods Avoid Soft “doughy” bread, Pasta, rice Avoid/delay Tough, dry, red meat Avoid/delay Nuts, popcorn, other fibrous foods Delay Caffeine Avoid/delay in moderation Alcohol Avoid/delay in moderation The article: https://asmbs.org/resources/integrated-health-nutritional-guidelines

I know it’s so, so common, especially for Bariatric patients and alcohol. I drink a glass or two of wine a night most nights but that was normal for me before and I don’t think it’s excessive. I definitely don’t drink to get drunk and rarely even get tipsy. But I used to be only a social smoker and I am now up to a pack a week 😕 I think it’s called addiction transferance? I want to cut back.