tannie

I not really sure how I got to this point.  I work full time as a special education teacher.  I guess I started gaining weight when I started trying to concieve.  I took all kinds of hormones with through IVF twice and had 5 miscarriages.  I have muscular dystrophy and all of this made my condition worse, after that my husband and I decided that we were not going to try anymore. The stress of this alomost deystroyed my marriage along with other problems.  We started dealing with life without children, and tried to make the best of it. Then we were asked to take in our niece and newphew, who were both very young.  This was suppose to be a short term placement, but their parents did not do what was needed to get them back.  Now 5 years down the road, they have decided they want to be parents, never mind that the children believe that we are their mom and dad.  So now I am in a custody battle that is the scariest thing I have ever dealt with--possibly losing my children.  Somewhere during all of this I have became obese. I really don't even know when it happened.  I just know I am tired and in pain and embarsed as to what I have become. My MD may end up putting me in a wheelchair even without this extra weight.  I realize I have very little control over alot of what is going on in my life. I can get control my weight though. I am taking this step to help me improve my health for myself, my faimly, my job and my mobility.  I am determened, yet afraid. I pray I can make this change and improve my life. I realize no matter what happens in my life I will always live in this body and I have to take better care of it.