If what you're doing isn't working you need to try something different. My best friend eats horribly and doesn't exercise either. She actually had her band removed once and put back in months later because she wasn't doing it right the first time. She's still practicing her unhealthy ways, but in the midst of all this she lost 80 lbs. I don't get it either, but you need to focus on you and not your friend.
You admitted that you weren't eating right and maybe that's all you need to change. =) Smoking will only hurt you and your weight loss.
I'm sincerely sorry about things with your boyfriend but know that there are other men out there. You WILL find someone who's willing to commit even if it's not today, tomorrow, or next month. Don't lose hope, You just need to kick into gear. =)
by the way, I didn't mean anything that I said harshly or rudely. I feel for you as I've been in VERY similar situations. Just trying to help. I wish you the best of luck.