Oberhasli

I'm not really doing that much now. My body quit. I haven't been to work since last Thursday and I didn't do evening chores until this morning and I did it in shifts between naps. (Still have to finish.) My poor girls went 18+ hours between milkings when they're use to 12. Obviously, I've never breastfed but I'm sure those of you that have can feel for them. They weren't happy with me! The doctor's office just called and there was "something" on the chest x-ray. They're not sure if it is scar tissue from the band surgery or something else (not sure why the lung would have scar tissue from the band) but I have a CT Scan tomorrow morning. They still aren't sure if the fatigue is tied to that or, more likely, a combination of things including weight loss. I haven't had caffiene since before surgery (well, maybe a couple servings of diet soda total since November) so that isn't an issue. I eat very little sugar (although have been cheating with ice cream of late) so that shouldn't be an issue. I don't eat much fish but then I don't eat much of anything. I stopped at a local Chinese restaurant and got their $3.99 lunch special and had 5 meals out of it and would have had a sixth but my dog decided to help himself before I got it put away. Need to go finish chores and then take a nap! Tom

I wasn't wanting to stop losing weight but kind of stablize where I'm at for a couple of months and then lose the rest, or at least slow down the weight loss to a more than 2 pounds per month. I went to my family doctor today and was weighed there. That was the scale where I was 316 on 3/31/06. Today I was 216 so 100 pounds in just under 14 months. My family doctor felt I was at a good weight now too and is concerned some of my recent health issues are due to losing too much weight too quickly. Had blood drawn, an EKG and a chest x-ray this morning in hopes of finding out why I have zero energy and my blood pressure, already naturally low, is going even lower. Should have the results next week but I've been off work for a week now. I do something, take a nap, do something, take another nap. Not sure if my RA is causing it, my nutrition, or that I'm old and lazy (use to say old, fat and lazy). Need a quick nap now before I go out and milk the goats yet again by hand. The milk machine is giving me fits! Tom

Don't have the feature to send my phone pic to my e-mail. Still trying to get some. Had a friend take pics of my goats at a show on Saturday but didn't think about a pic of me. Depending on her income, tell her to check into HCAP. If she's not rich, she may qualify for at least a partial reduction in the bill. If she doesn't qualify, tell her to negotiate the price as they NEVER get the amount they bill from the insurance company. (My band surgery was almost $40K total in billing. The insurance paid around $12K, so less than 1/3 of the bill.) As long as she makes an attempt to pay (at least $5/month) hospitals don't typically turn you over to collections or report it negatively to the credit bureaus. Tom

I didn't lose 100 pounds in 6 months. I've lost 97 pounds since I started the banding quest last March but lost 26 pounds pre-band. I've lost 71 pounds in the 6 months since the band. Needless to say, I'm happy with the results. I would like to lose 9 more pounds but the doctor was talking 30 more. I'd be in "onderland" and at 6'3" and big framed, I'm afraid I won't look healthy. Everyone already tells me there is nothing left. Now, the ice cream awaits! Tom

Well, I had my 6-month check-up with the surgeon today. Since it is a teaching hospital, I always get seen by someone before the surgeon. Today, as last time, was a Nurse Practitioner (in training). She and I agreed that I was pretty close on the goal weight and maybe a bit less fill to stablize was in order. That got vetoed by the doctor, though. He thinks I'm doing everything right and should be the poster-child for the band. (And remember, he is not pro-band!) While my goal is now 210 (just 9 pounds away!!!), he says my "ideal" weight is actual 189 so if I go a bit under 210, it would be OK. He told me to continue eating several small meals a day but up the calorie count a bit to slow the weight loss down. I'm not to go off the deep end, and still need to watch my protein, but I have his permission to add higher calorie foods. He said if I continue to lose at the same rate (I've lost 71 pounds in 6 months since the surgery), let him know and he'll take some out otherwise I go back in 6 months. Will you all hate me if my goal is to eat more ice cream every day? Tom

I have my cheerleader outfit on again. <G> Don't discount everyday things as exercise. I started by parking at the end of the parking lot instead of in the handicap spots. I always do the steps at work (I work on the second floor). Housework IS exercise. Yardwork IS exercise. It's not going to a gym, but trust me, everything physical your body does burns calories and makes you stronger. I was suprised how many steps a day I take just getting through the day. (Of course, when I wore the pedometer, my diabetes was in full swing and I peed every hour on the hour and my desk at work wasn't close to the restroom. <G>) I guess the point is don't make excuses for not getting in your exercise but don't forget there are things you do that are exercise even if you don't put on workout clothes and sweat. (And remember, sex IS exercise so if you did that yesterday, that counts too. <G>) Tom

Go back and read your commitments for the week. They were exercising and not snacking between certain times. While over-eating at a buffet is not an ideal situation, you're comittments for the week did not include that. DON'T beat yourself up. You can still work on your commitments and accomplish those goals. Once you've done that, add in new goals, such as not eating at buffets! Tom

YEAH BetsyJane! :clap2: :clap2: Making clear, measurable goals is the first step to success. Just remember, make the goals realistic. Success encourages more success. Set goals that are enough of a challenge to make progress but not so out of the realm of possibility that you set yourself up to fail. (For instance, if you're not exercising at all to say you'll exercise an hour a day 6 times might be a bit too optimistic.) The other component is that if you have a day that challenges you, remember it is just one day. Don't let a bump make you give up. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back on track. (And no, it's not that I'm that inspirational but those are tips directly from the LEARN program that I did find beneficial. For exercise, it had you start exercise with a pedometer. Once you've worn it for a week, then your goal the next week was to increase by about 20% the next week, and continue until you reach 10,000 steps a day.) Tom

Men have hormones are cravings too, it's just not food center! My problem has been my RA has been flaring (my milking machine died so I'm hand milking which flares it up) and the tissue around the band tightens so even though the band isn't overly tight, I get restriction. And please don't hate me, but I'm actually trying to slow the weight loss down. I'm just under my first goal weight so want to stablize here for a bit and let the body rest. (Actually wanted to stop about 3 pounds ago. Haven't updated the ticker but am not at 222.) Once my body has had a weight loss rest, I'll lose the last 10-12 pounds. I never craved chocolate before (salty things, yes), but now that's my downfall. So far, I've been good about it. I buy low-fat, NSA ice cream with chocolate or get the snack size candy bar and allow myself one a day as my cheat. I figure if I can do things in moderation, I won't go off the deep end when I finally have it. Tom

My mother and grandmother (who just turned 87!) offered to come out and clean for me. Problem is I have to clean up before they come. <G> Fortunately, it's been dry that last several days so the dogs don't bring in half the back yard with them every time they come in. I did get some dishes done this morning. I tried out the mower and got a small amount mowed, got chores done plus got a goat bathed so I can clip her for a show. Eating lunch now (it's VERY hard to eat slow when you're body is on fast-forward) and then it's off to work. I still think I need a sugar-mommy (heck, I'd take a sugar daddy!). Then I could lounge around, enjoy my animals and not have to worry about work. Problem is I VERY much enjoy living alone so it would have to be someone that would visit maybe once a week. I need to be someone's mastress (is that the male version of a mistress?)! Tom

I have 10 girlfriends, and one more coming, and all have big breasts. <G> (I'm milking 10 now and 1 more yet to have her babies.) I finally got "custody" of the mower, had it serviced and it is suppose to be delivered today so get the pleasure of mowing now too. Need to do some fence repair and the goats can help out! Sadly, with the farm work, I can't seem to find enough hours in the day to make it to the gym. I have to milk 12 hours apart, plus feed the babies, take care of the dogs, every now and then (and more "then" than now lately) do housework laundry, dishes, etc. and with an hour drive each way to work, I can't figure out how to fit that in. The good news is that I'm getting exercise here as I spend about 3 hours a day on chores. Every now and then I like to go out with friends but that has become a rarity too. Once the babies are all here and are all eating well, and I sell a few of the goats, I should have a bit more time. Of course, summer is show season and between showing and judging, there isn't a lot of "free" time. I've been hesitant to do it but I'm going to drop the membership at the fitness center until later in the year. I can't see spend $15 a month for something I rarely use. (I haven't been at all in the last 2 weeks and before that only once a week.) I get plenty of cardio work here. Need some weight training. Maybe I'll pick up some small dumbbells that I can use at my desk at work. I'm on the phone the majority of the day so can sit/stand and do some exercising there. Now, it's off to pinch some titties. Tom

I went to my first goat show of the season yesterday. Goat shows in this part of the country start the first weekend of May and end shortly after Labor Day. We have a conference in November but it was 4 days post-surgery last fall so I didn't go. I only see a lot of the people at the shows during show season only so most of the people there haven't seen me since I was banded. I also just buzzed my hair all off so a bit of a different look. (Wasn't intentional but don't totally hate it!) Anyway, I walked in the barn and up to a couple of friends and they did not recognize me until I started talking. The standing joke was that I left my other half at home with the hair. (The fact that my ex, who also shows goats wasn't there, made "the other half" joke even more appropriate.) I walked in with one of our goats just before showing and a fellow exhibitor, who I've shown with for years, asked where I bought the goat I had. I just said we bred (meaning born on our farm) her and they asked my name. They finally realized who I was. (Our goats have a very distinctive look to them that most in the breed recognize.) Anyway, it was kind of fun to have everyone swooning over the "new" me. Most were shocked to hear I had another 15 pounds to lose. Of course, they were even more shocked to hear how much I've lost as I did hide my weight well before. One friend purposefully has not asked how the weight loss was going before as she knew many were sensitive about the topic and some don't do well. (Another goat breeder had the gastric bypass over two years ago and did really well the first year but definitely seems considerably larger this year than she did last year.) Anyway, she could tell it was working. Last year at this show, I wore a size 46 pant. This year, I wore a size 36 and my "noassatall" disease was evident as they were a bit saggy in the back. (My ex always told me I had a cute butt and said I don't have any at all now.) Tom

Repeat after me. One pound a week ON AVERAGE is good! One pound a week! The difference between 255 (surgery weight) and 225 (3/25 weight) is 31 pounds. You are NOT 31 weeks post surgery. You're doing fine. You'll have good weeks and you'll have less than ideal weeks but if you're averaging greater than 1 pound a week, you're doing a good think. Think back over the years. When was the last time you lost over 30 pounds in less than 6 months? Losing weight at a steady, slow pace gives your body a chance to adapt to the changes. You'll likely have far less flab and loose skin than if you dropped it quickly. I don't know about you, but I want to look good with or without clothes! <G> (Now, just to find someone to look!) Happy 6-month anniversary to my fellow bandsters. I have my 6-month follow-up in a couple of weeks. Can't believe that it's been 6 months already. Tom

Ex got custody of the digital camera and I've not yet broken down to get one. I'll see what I can do. I'm just your average, middle-aged, balding, not-quite-as-overweight guy. People I don't know well are telling me I'm getting too skinny which is why I guess it's hitting home. I expect those that I'm close with to be more comfortable with the "old" me but when people I only see off and on comment about how skinny and think I've lost too much, I start to wonder. I go to the surgeon mid-May so really can't do much to slow the weight loss between now and then. At my current rate, I'll be within 10 pounds of the adjusted goal anyway. Tom

Thanks llitltweety. Last time I was at the surgeon, he called me skinny. I first of all discounted it as it did come from people I'm close to. Now, even casual acquaintances say I should lose more so I'm starting to think they may know something I don't. Of course, they (or at least most of them <G>) haven't seen me without clothes! My ex did see me in my workout shorts and mentioned my legs were not only very white but definitely needed toned. It started with a very good friend telling me I didn't need to lose anymore but they weren't happy I had the surgery to begin with so I just discounted that opinion. Even my son, who typically says nothing personal, said I'm skinny. (My 210 idea came from the fact that's what he weighs and he's just a bit shorter than I am and I think he's a good weight - enough to him he looks healthy but not at all chubby.) Tom

OK, I'm now 2 pounds away from my original goal (225) but the doctor and I revised that to 210, so 17 pounds away. Problem is that in spite of the fact that I'm down 10" in waist, when I look in the mirror, I don't see a big difference so definitely feel I need to go to at least 210. (I am 6'3".) Most of my co-workers, my ex-wife and a few close friends all tell me I'm too skinny now. The last thing I want to be is gaunt and not look healthy but enough people are saying it does make me stop and think. Are they saying it because they're use to the "fat" me and I'm not that bad or am I approaching the "too skinny" point? (Yeah, I know. All the years of people calling me fat and now I'm concerned they call me skinny. Guess I'm never happy!) My tentative plan is to get to around 220 and then kind of hold for my body to adjust. Of course, I don't go back to the doctor until mid-May for my 6 month checkup so not sure how I'll stop losing without having some fill taken out. I am going to the gym twice a week (more or less) and am starting to notice some definition in the arms and legs although there is plenty of flab still left. :think Still don't like it but make myself do it. The other issue I'm having is that I think the calcium supplement is causing inflammation that causes too much restriction. I started having problems after doing great with 2.5 cc in the band right after I switched vitamins and started on the calcium. They took out .5 cc and had me go off of both for a week, add the vitamin alone for a week and then add the calcium. Last week was much better on just the vitamin but this week has been more of a struggle since adding back in the calcium. Guess I'm going to go back off and just try to make calcium and see how it goes. Anyone else notice any problem with taking calcium? Tom

Connie, he's male. We don't always know when to shut up. :omg: Add in that he's going through testerone overload, and he's thinking from between his legs. :faint: This will pass. In about 15 years. :heh: Tom

I'm certainly not saying to condone the behavior but I also don't view looking at porn (either online or in a magazine/movie) as being an activity that is going to negatively impact them for the rest of their lives. Breaking house rules are not acceptable and that he should be punished for. One of the things that contributed to my divorce was that my ex and I did not agree on punishment for the child. Admittedly, I'm very strict but I felt penalties needed to be swift and of a severe enough nature that it would discourage the negative behavior in the future. Once a punishment was issued, I did not feel that it should be rescinded. We would come up with plans for discipline, advise the child and then if he would do something, she'd backpedal on the punishment as she'd go through guilt trips. Even kids that struggle academically (and my son is literally border-line genius) aren't stupid and quickly learn to work the guilt to their benefit. Tom

Betsyjane, not that I'm a porn expert (really, I'm not <G>), but not all porn is geared to "perfect" bodied women. There are people that enjoy (a bit too much, maybe) LARGE people of either gender. There are all kinds of fetishes out there so porn, in and of itself, does not mean that a particular image is being promoted or exploited. Plus, he may not of been looking at the pictures. I'm sure he was reading it for the articles. :heh: Not to make light of the situation, but I don't think that everyone that looks at porn is perverted or looking for their next victim. Granted, some are, but some are simply healthy, sexual beings that happen to like looking at pictures of a sexual nature. I think you can be a fully adjusted "normal" person even if you occasionally look at naked people. As I said, to me the issue is more that he broke the trust than he looked at porn. Tom

I understand the concern over using your computer as it is another trust broken. As a parent, when I caught our son in a lie, it made me question the other things he was doing and not getting caught doing. Fortunately, our son was/is a pathetic liar so tends to get caught immediately. Tom

OK, a man's perspective. First of all, DON'T back down on your punishment whether you are right or wrong. It teaches them that if they whine and complain enough, you'll cave so any future punishment you give will have no value. You can add conditions in which he can earn specific, limited privileges by displaying good behavior. As to the prom, especially a young man with hormones obviously fully engaged, prom is an opportunity to put those hormones to use with something other than oneself. Unless he needs to burn those extra calories, you may want to think strongly on this. Or offer to allow him to go but you're going to chaperone. (My guess is that will kill the moment quite quickly!) I'll probably get tarred and feathered for the next comment (but hey, it's not kinky if you all enjoy it <G>), but porn is not the worse thing in the world and it's FAR safer than putting those desires to use with others. Unless his hand has been bad and going places it shouldn't, at which point he can wear a latex glove, he's not going to catch anything or father a child by looking at porn and relieving some built up tensions. (My son, who will be 19 on Sunday, use to get made as if he were acting extra bitchy, I'd ask him if he needed to go to the other room and release some tensions. It embarrassed him but was usually quite effective in an immediate turn around in behavior.) Sorry, but boys will be boys. Of all of his indiscretions, the things that would bother me the most are his lying and the smoking. I also told our son that no matter what he did, the punishment for lying would be far more severe than anything he could do. Once you've lost my trust, it will take a very, very long time to restore it. The smoking is not only expensive but clearly a major health risk. I started smoking when in 3rd grade and smoke 3 packs a day by the time I was in high school. I haven't smoked for 12+ years but there are still days I crave them. If you nag him on this, he's going to do it as rebellion. The Cancer Society volunteer method may work. Kids now days now the health risk but as teenagers, think they're invinsible. Tom

I went to the surgeon today since I haven't eaten anything of substance in 12 days. I've been back on liquids for the past week. The thought was that the RA flare has my tissue swollen causing more restriction. They did remove .5 cc so am now back at 2 and I was able to eat today. I didn't think about it but this all started about the time I switched vitamins (used up the chewables and will to a pill) and also added the calcium. They don't think those should have had any factor but suggested I go off of both for a week and in a week start back on the vitamin. If that goes well, after a week I'll add in the calcium. I'm 25 pounds from my revised goal weight so making good progress. Tom

Years ago, we use to have a "Quarter Cup" at work. Every time you complained, you had to put in a quarter. There were days that I'd walk in and but a $5 bill because I knew what kind of day it was going to be! I don't remember what we did with the money in the cup (maybe went to Happy Hour?) but it's another way of making you aware of your actions. The more aware of what we do in any given area is likely to help us be more aware of the food choices we're making. Mindless eating has gotten many of us to the point we needed the band. Tom

Betsyjane, the goal is for a "complaint free world" so I think Bush would be off limits. My old boss use to call me cynical. I said I preferred to think of it as being realistic so perception can be everything. If you state facts of stupidity, maybe it's not complaining. The bracelet comes with information on how to use it but it is to be self-monitored so you'll have to be the one to decide whether you're complaining or not. But wonder if the comment about "fat wrists" is a complaint. :omg: And you're wrists should be thinning. A friend was doing this with an imaginery bracelet. She did look awfully odd "moving" the bracelet from one arm to the other. Tom

I finally heard back from the surgeon and I'm going in Monday. I'm still not doing well consuming food. I've switched back to my blender and feel a bit better since I've gotten some nutrition but still feel weak. My mom had gotten me a bathroom scale some time ago that I've never used. I have no idea how accurate it is but if it's anywhere close to right, I've lost quite a bit of weight in the past week. I guess not eating has that effect! Anyway, as I lay around and sip my bons-bons (can't eat them!), I watched Oprah the other day. They had a minister that came up with the idea of a complaint free world. To make you more conscious of the amount you might complain about various things, he came up with one of the rubberized bracelets (kind of like the Lance Armstrong yellow ones from a few years back) that his church gives away (the ask for donations). Every time you complain, you move the bracelet to the other arm. The goal is to keep the bracelet on the same arm for 21 days as that is how long it typically takes to develop a new habit. The link for ordering the bracelet is: http://acomplaintfreeworld.fobby.net/Complaint_Free_Bracelet_Order_Form.php (You may need to cut and paste the link.) Being positive is key to successful weight loss so this might help all of us too. Along that line, maybe we need to wear something (even a rubber band) that we move every time we make less than ideal food choices. We all know what we're suppose to eat. For me, keeping a food log was a great way to stay on track. The moving of a band might work too. Friends/family would be watching the band so it might make us stop and think before we order the Wendy's Chocolate Butterfinger Fix 'N Mix frosty. (Not, of course, that I would ever do such a thing. <G>) (BTW, with the complaint bracelet, if you tell someone they need to move theirs for complaining, you have to move yours too!) Tom