desperatemommy

Hello all! Im so glad to have found this wonderful website! I have been reseaching the lapband for 2 weeks now! day and night!!!  I have two friend who have done it, and look and feeel wonderful! I have tried all diets, and failed! I luv food, but although I have exercised all my life and I run, a couple half marathons and 1 full. so I am active, but have no control of food. I finally came to the honest truth that I need professional help. Im at risk of diabetis, both parents have it, and both gandparents on both sides have it also. I deal with diabetic symthoms everyday but everytime I go to get checked I come out clean? I also have a retina detaching, and my eye specialist said the last thing I need is diabetis taking over and causing me to loose my eye sight.  I just want to be healthy, and there for my kids future. Now I do not have insurance for a year now . (since ive stopped working).  but I want to know whats faster self pay , medicaid, or bluecross blue shield. and who gives you a harder time? if I selfpay are the cost too high monthly ? and do they want a down payment first? I feel so stuck, and out of hope. I just see everyone on this sight soo happy and positive, and now Im admitting this overweight thing is very depressing to me.    soo please readers help me out and give me the best advice.    (affordable docs if there are)?