abethnyc

First of all I can't believe it's almost 4 yrs post surgery!! I probably have a typical story- I was always the cubby kid, the girl who was told 'you have such a pretty face'. I had been on plenty of diets throughout my life. I counted calories and carbs and whatever else you can measure. I never knew life as an teenager as smaller then a size 12. 12 rapidly turned into 14/16 and I pretty much stayed at that size for the majority of my teens and early 20s. Sure I would go on diets and loose 20 lbs and my "skinny pants" would fit for about a week. I always had tons of friends and always was outwardly ok with being the chubby girl. Of course on the inside I cried about how hard I had to work to get a boyfriend or how much harder I had to prove myself in work and school.  It was insanely hard in college to control my weight, my best friend who was a size 0 would go to the dining hall and eat whatever she wanted and not gain a pound. I watched all week so I could splurge on a piece of pizza on the weekend (which turned into 3 slices and way more beer then I should drink). The freshman 15 or 30 was inevitable. I would come home and be admonished about gaining weight from my extremely loving, but concerned parents, which only made me eat more. Anyway, the turning point for me was going into my first yr of grad school. I had a physical done for health insurance purposes. I remember not eating breakfast that morning so my weight wouldn't be that high. I thought at the most I was 210 lbs so when the doctor came in and told me my weight was 241 lbs.  I freaked out. I mean I was 24 yrs old. Actually to say I freaked out would be the understatement of the century. I vowed to go on a diet and hit the gym, but with classes starting it just became harder. I got more depressed and of course I ate more. So another key part of this story is that my aunt had been banded 7 yrs before me (she lives in isreal and the surgery is/was a huge thing there). I started doing my research about the band. At first I really felt like having surgery was like throwing in the towel or taking the easy way out. For anyone who's gone through this they know that's not the case. Post surgery is hard work!! Relearning how to eat, making sure you get enough protein, etc. etc. etc.  I had a moment on a Friday night where I just decided that this is what I wanted. I called my mom and she cried. I was so afraid of failure that I didn't want to tell my sister, but eventually was convinced to do so. She was suprisingly the biggest supporter of this decision and has continued to be the past 4 yrs. Being banded was one of those things I did in private. I was away at school so I didn't share any of this with my friends, only the immediate family knew. I just was terrified of failure. I knew I would some weight but I was convinced it wouldn't be enough or I'd eventually gain it all back.It took me 3 yrs to start telling some people and it was the most liberating thing in the world. Especially when people that didn't know me as the chubby girl would say there is no way you used to be 100 lbs heavier!
It's been a long journey, I did go through a period where I loosened my band and gained 30+ lbs back. I am still dealing with getting protein on a daily basis. I have some issues keeping my iron levels up (red meat is hard  to swallow- most bandsters know that). The hardest for me was my hair getting thinner. I cut it, styled it, teased it and finally gave in and got hair extensions. Yes of course I take vitamins and use rogaine and all that other fun stuff, but I'm 28 I didn't want to be all self conscience about my hair. Especially cause now I'm wearing a size 6-8. I mainly joined this group because don't know that many people who went through this process. I feel like I want connections to people who really understand.I hope people contact me for inspiration or just to chat :-)