newtothis

I've struggled being overweight my whole life. Throuhout school, and afterwards it was something that i dealt with. it caused me a great deal of depression, and self esteem issues. I was always trying to compensate for my lack of pride in myself by being extroverted, making fun of myself and my weight, publically, while being disgusted and ashamed of myself privately. Im sure i could delve into numerous childhood traumatic stories, efforts at losing and regaining some weight, the nightmare that is depression and causing you to find refuge in anything of familiar comfort, like food, but im sure the majority of people in the same situation all experience that too. I've found the toughest thing with being this size is the reaction from different people towards you. Some friends are wonderfully true, and dont see you for the size you are, while others cant seem to see past the 'situation', whether their concern is valid interest in your wellbeing, or their own personal hangup about overweight people.recently ive decided that i'm very happy with the person i am on the inside, and just finally felt this is something i want to do for myself. i'd thought about the surgery for a long time, but especially over the past two years, but was always put off by the thought of the cost, pain, stigma of having such an operation, while battling with myself saying its okay to be the size i am. I am relatively happy with myself, but yearn to experience the freedom and self confidence a number of my friends have at my age. when it hit me that i was only a few weeks away from turning 28, and then 30's not far along, i thought i'd spend some time, do the research, and get all the information i could, and finally say yes or no. I decided to proceed ahead, and 2 days after my 28th birthday i went in and had the procedure (done 17th December 2009). I still havent told anyone about my decision other than my immediate family, and best friend. i guess im looking to find out how other people have had friends etc react, and how in general their journeys have gone. i'm hoping to hit my ideal goal weight of 85 kilos (187 pounds) for my 30th birthday, 2 years from now. My starting weight is 153 Kilos (336 pounds)From what i can tell, the majority of people undergoing this surgery are in their mid to late thirties, im hoping to get some knowledge from them, but mainly track and talk to people in the same age group as myself doing this, and see how that goes.