green

I know two women who almost died while giving birth. Both of these events happened within the past decade and both of these women very much wanted their children. One of these women was my cousin's wife. While she was having a caesarian the doc knicked a major artery and the poor woman almost bled out. The other individual was a lesbian friend of mine. She started haemmorhaging during childbirth. She told me later that it was both a terrifying and gruesome experience. Her hospital room looked like a slaughter house. My brother, who is a doctor now practising in Virginia, was told in one of his first year med classes that until the development of 20th century medical techniques more women died during or immediately post child birth than men did in wars. Birthing was risky business.

Thanks for pointing this out. This hadn't occurred to me. I also found the other folks' remarks in this thread to be very enlightening.

Once I was late for a date by 3 days.

Well, Obama is way hotter than Dubya!!!

It is hard not to judge unlovely stinky people negatively. Anyone can take a shower.

I have always suffered from time management issues.

It sounds like Green is gonna have to renew her passport, travel south of the border, and smack Obama's PR bitches up. This might be a real good move. Green has been dreaming for a long time now about experiencing real bar-b-que, eh. lol

Implicit in my above post is the belief that when one is choosing a leader one must always opt to consult the head and not the heart. Though it is true that mini Bush might be a cosy guy to hang with the complexities of managing a global super-power will demand much more than simple down home charm. Bluntly put, this will require that although the individual is capable of maintaining a solid set of core values, he or she is not so rigid as to be rendered incapable of adapting and changing according to new information and circumstances. I know that many people view that a change in stance or policy is a sign of weakness. I have always taken the other view. I see the lack of change as possibly being an indicator of arrogance, inflexibility, stubborness, and an inability to learn. We live in a society that is constantly being flooded with new information. It is crucial that we are open to receiving this, learning from it, and figuring out how to take advantage of it. This is arguably the strength of the human race. This is why I admit to favouring Obama. Though I certainly do like his ideals - they strike me as being very Canadian - I am also struck by the fact that the guy is a realist and one who likes to tap into the knowledge of his team. This indicates that he will be a flexible kind of cat, one who will feel comfortable taking in new information and adjusting his strategies accordingly. Such a leader will understand Realpolitik. Unlike the rigid and sub-intellectual Bush, he will not be driven by a blend of ideological fantasies and paranoias.

I am another foreigner but I do care. You see, like it or not, America does swing the biggest dick, globally speaking. And this, given the alternatives, is a bluddy good thing. The ethical and economic health of the United States will inevitably affect the ethical and economic health of the rest of us. This is what we call Realpolitik. It is unfortunate that the mini-Bush administration was an unmitigated disaster in oh so many ways. The truth is that the invasion of Iraq parrallels the Vietnam offensive in that it was, in part, driven by an ideological paranoia, one that results in the loss of lives and limbs, the fracturing of the American soul, and the mortgaging of the American economy. Of course this Iraqi offensive has caused you to lose respect in the international community both in those little third world nations who still do hold voting power in the U.N. and, more importantly, in the eyes of the other developed nations. And of course you are aware that Bush and company opted to go ahead with this invasion even though an international team (this was headed up by Hans Blix) had found absolutely no sign of weapons of mass destruction and that Sadam, monsterous despot though he certainly was, was aggressively against all forms of Islamic fundamentalism. Indeed Blix appeared before your Congress shortly before Bush gave the okay to invade in order to state that his team had found zero signs of WMD. Yep, Sadam was a modernist in his own morally heinous fashion. He was anti-fundamentalism. And his excesses could have been reigned in by old-fashioned diplomacy, sanctions, and the usual indirect off-shore applications of muscle. In the middle east this now usually consists of throwing your support behind Israel. In the past, when America was arguing with the Soviet Union you were tossing cash, weapons, and military training to the Taliban in Afghanistan. This has now proven to be a poor policy. Those countries which do harbour Islamic fundamentalists are Afghanistan, Pakistan (a country which has nuclear knowledge), and Saudi Arabia. In fact the fundamentalist movement is tied into Wahhabism, a fundamentalist belief system which was born in Saudi Arabia. I am certainly no specialist. These are facts which are general knowledge to yer general public and this is why both the actions and the justifications for these actions on the part of George W and his gang have horrified so many of us foreigners. And this is why we will continue to feel comfortable commenting on your internal affairs - it is this knowledge that you are the single most powerful nation amongst us all. We do, like it or not, rely upon you, and why we pay such close attention to your internal affairs and not those of, say, Mali.

You might be interested to know that sometimes very unhappy children will have fantasies that they were adopted and that they really do not belong to these folks who call themselves their families.

A good idea. Afterall, they have already banned smokers from smoking.

Happy birthday to you, Wheets, from Green. I found your woes to be pretty interesting because I suffer from them myself and this is why I dread birthdays and Xmas time. I find both receiving and giving gifts to be very, very stressful. My husband and I did go through a brief and painful period of trying to surprise each other with gifts which neither of the recipients liked. Now we are likely to simply pick up the tab when we find that one or the other of us is caught ogling an item. This makes for zero birthday and Xmas surprises but on the other hand our policy makes for zero awkwardness and zero tragic waste of cash, either. We both find this much more restful. Is it possible that you could come to some kind of similar arrangement with your mate? I know that I still treasure his gifts to me even though I have chosen them. It is just that I figure that I have excellent taste, eh..... haha

This should be considered to be a sidebar to, not as a hi-jacking of, the main conversation, but I confess that I do find this conversation to be extremely interesting. You see, my family was very tribal: my parents were fond of pointing out how my brothers and myself took after one or another of the genetic forebears. Oddly enough, they were not at all prepared to acknowledge the dark side of our genetic inheritance: this would be our severe problems with depression. For sure my parents were cherry picking when it came to acknowledging the genetic values of our particular tribe. At the same time, I find it interesting to understand how an individual might feel who has been given a very strong sense of family - for each adopted child has been actively chosen - and yet who remains in the dark about all that genetic/tribal information. Please understand that I mean no disrespect by these comments and I certainly have no desire to hurt or offend anyone.

Nice to hear kind thoughts from the other old timers. As for Indio's question about my current state of fill, well, I have been living in a state of defill since last August. This has been prompted by my medical hassles. I had initially figured that I was going through a bout of acid reflux and that once this was under control I would be able to get myself filled up and that life would continue on its pleasant and orderly path. Problem is that since this defill other personal medical stuff has been going on. It does not seem that any of this is connected to my beloved band. I sure do feel frustrated by my current set of medical headaches and although I am doing fine at maintaining my membership in normoloid city I sure do miss the restriction provided by my band.

Though this may be true, and the definition of what constitutes life does vary according to whom one consults, there still remains the question of the comparative values which we choose to place on life. This is why many individuals are comfortable with collateral/civilian damage in war zones. This is also why many individuals are comfortable with the death penalty even though it has been proven that some of the forensics and some of the police procedures have been proven to be faulty. This is also why many folks are able to skip out of a murder conviction when the background story consists of self-defense. And of course this is also why the insurance pay-outs will be adjusted in wrongful death lawsuits. The deaths of a van full of doctors will be a greater loss to their own families and to our society than that of the loss of a van full of convicted felons. In brief, society will always be forced to make compromises; these will be based on a series of competing needs In just such a way I feel that the rights of the pregnant woman must always trump those of the foetus. For the truth is that for many women who find themselves lumbered with unwanted pregnancies the situation is dire. And in the competition between the demands of the foetus and the person who is already here, the needs of that individual who is already alive and well and breathing and who is firmly planted in this life, I see no contest.

Yep, I did get the bling. I took my husband over for a visit and he agreed that the bracelet was fairly fabulous. We ended up buying it. He paid for half and I paid for the other half. In fact he paid for more than half and he was prepared to pick up the entire tab. To tell you the truth I never did start acquiring any "official jewellery" until I became involved with him. He is a very nice mate, isn't he? As to life without fill, to tell you the truth, I still suffer from "fat" head. I certainly don't eat like I used to before I was banded and because I lost my weight slowly my body had the chance to reset its metabolism. This means that my current weight seems to have become the new normal weight for my metabolism; in other words, my body is behaving more like a normoloid's body when it comes to metabolising those calories. So, this means that my new style of eating, my reduced appetite, and my new metabolism are all paying off big time for me. But there is still that fat head biz, eh. What this consists of is the fact that my body is perfect (according to my mate, that is - lol) but my mind still figures that I am a fatty grrl. I am still not completely at ease with my current physical appearance. I do tend to buy oversized clothes and I am beset by this fear that I will go to bed as a normo and wake up as a plus sized grrl, that I will blow up overnight. This terror would indicate that I feel that the control of my body and my weight was/is beyond my control. And it is true that weight control was entirely outside of my control until I was banded. Fat just seemed to happen despite my best wishes. Certainly this is a terrifying place for anyone of us to find ourselves in, that place where one feels that one's body is something that is out of one's control and is in fact one's enemy. I have read that folks who discover that they have cancer and teenagers who are diagnosed with juvenile diabetes have this same sense of betrayal by their own bodies, this same sense of powerlessness, and of frustration, rage, and of outrage. This has turned out to be a rather long explanation of where I am currently at, eh? Sorry about that but I thought that you might be interested about hearing my take on the issues of integrating the outer Skinny Minnie with the still resident interior Fatty Fanny. This being said, even though I am going through all the headaches which I have outlined for you, I sure do love my fab new normo body and I sure do love the results of my face lift. I have zero regrets and I am enjoying the compliments which I have been receiving. To tell you the truth I have found that my self-confidence has been enormously boosted by the weight loss and by the face lift. And, oooh, I really wish that you could ship some sun and heat up to my part of the world. This has been a tough winter locally. We haven't seen much sunlight since last October. This lack of light is difficult to deal with. And there has been more snow and more lousy weather than we have been used to in my city. Sunday was so cold that I had to beg off going for a walk with a girlfriend because the combination of the cold and my ruined lungs didn't allow me to function outdoors. Today I awoke to another snowfall. The snow is still falling at this time. The sky is grey....again! I must admit that the streetscape sure looks beautiful while the snow is falling. My mate has chosen to stay home and I am going to cook chili tonight. Life up here in the ultra dreary north does have its few okay moments. I sure wish I was spending the evening with you, though. Thanks for the thought of sending a little light and heat in my direction.

Oh, grrl! Thanks to the success of my band and my face lift I look pretty good but I have been having health problems. It seems that my throat problems are more complicated than acid reflux. I've been growing increasingly hoarse and now I only croak. I have also developed some sort of weird lung problem. I get bronchitis whenever I get colds and I figure that this is just a case of untreated bronchitis but this time my doc has decided that I have asthma and instead of giving me antibiotics and inhalers she has me only on inhalers. I have been wheezing and gurgling for months now. And I can only croak when I attempt to talk. Exercise is now out of the question. On the bright side, even though I have been without fill since last August I have managed to lose a further 6 or 7lbs. That is pretty cool, eh. And I will be seeing an Ears, Nose and Throat specialist next week. Maybe he will put me on antibiotics.... How are you doing, kiddo?

Cure, I agree with Doddie. It sure would be a drag to lose your voice here on LBT. Though it is true that the strength of this site is that it is a large one and can accomodate all sorts of personalities and interests your voice is kind of a special one for us locals. You see, you really were our local band pioneer and we appreciate being able to hear how your life is unfolding. Of course the choice of whether to stay or leave is yours to make but please do understand that one hurtful remark does not a coven of bitches make.

Argon, I don't know whether you read my post on Effexor or not but I had a very bad experience with this drug because of its side effects. One of its side effects is that it will drive up your blood pressure. My blood pressure is normally good. While I was on Effexor I had to be on meds to control high blood pressure. Another side effect is constipation - severe constipation!!! I also gained weight on this drug.

When I go out to a restaurant I generally order entrees which can be packed up, taken home, and nuked for a second meal. This is what I like to do with my leftovers.

You can go to this great site called RateMDs.com and slag your doctor. Or, if you have a good one, you can praise him/her.

My parents had a place in Sarasota and the mate has fond memories of that.

Bwahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Congratulations, Ceradad, on your child. I have known other folks who were in the same situation as you yourself and your wife. In fact my own brother's second wife is desperate to have a child. I have been finding your voice to be an interesting one because you speak both as an adoptee and as an adopting parent. I, like all pro-choicers, want choice but only as a choice. This means that I believe that women who do find themselves pregnant must have the freedom to choose whether they will continue on with their pregnancies, as Cera's birth mother did, or terminate. There was a time when there were so many babies resulting from unwanted pregnancies that there were not enough adoptive parents for all of them. These children grew up in orphanages. Their early lives were bleak indeed and thus they grew up handicapped for achieving success and happiness in their adult lives. Now, because of choice and because unwed mothers feel free to raise their children without social stigma demand has outstripped supply.

Sometime ago, Gadget, you asked the question why sexually active women who had no desire to have children did not get themselves sterilized. Well, you asked that question specifically of me since I was the one who ended up having an abortion due to a birth control failure. I told you that back in those days, the 1970s and early 1980s, it was impossible for a young and childless woman to find a doctor who would agree to sterilize her and that I would ask my very hip young female doc if this still holds true today. Well, it appears that it likely does. She turns down all requests for sterilization from the young and the childless on the grounds that they may change their minds later on. She says that sometimes people do and that they then thank her for having refused their requests.