Electrawoman

Hey everyone! I am sad to hear that some of you are having problems with your band but happy that you are still posting here and trying hard. I have lost around 90 lbs so far. Losing goes slow but that is okay with me. There is a definite pattern to the way I lose: down 2, up four, down 5. I am getting close to my mini-goal and it's almost a little scary. When I realize it and feel anxious, I notice that I have a bad day...eating more junk, etc. I think that is fear-based self sabatoge but haven't figured out what I am afraid of. I have gone from 22-24 to 16-18 now. When I look in the mirror, I still see the same person I always did. That's not necessarily a bad thing because I never really saw myself as "fat" weird, I know My body is smaller but the shape is still the same, though. I definitely LOVE not being tied to food or plus-size clothing stores anymore. I have more energy. My sleep apnea has improved by 75% and the pain in my ankle is not as severe. I have had one fill since being banded and my doctor says I am doing great. I am starting to play with the idea of a tummy tuck or body lift when all is said and done. I had said I never would (surgery for vanity sake) but it seems a shame to not finish the job I started. For those of you who are still struggling, don't give up.

I just got a reply to this topic in my email and thought I would update you. I just found out this week that I was NOT in menopause after all. Turns out, my Mirena implant affected my hormones and mimicked the signs of menopause. I still have had a period in a couple of years and I was FINE with that. But, this means I have to go through menopause all over again some time in the future! Ugh. For those of you going through it, hang in there.

I am approaching my one-year anniversary and notice that when I am stressed out, I PB more and its harder to eat. Has anyone else here experienced this?

Yeah, I finally asked my doctor about it too. It's hard to eat in public because of all the noise and distractions. Most nights, I sit with my son at the dinner table but don't actually eat my food until he goes to bed and it's completely quiet.

Do I regret getting banded? That seemed to be the question I most wanted answered when I came here about a year ago looking for information and support. A lot has changed in a year. I am a little less than halfway to my goal now and losing slowly and steadily. 40-whatever pounds doesn't seem like much for a year but I have lost a lot of baggage along with that weight. Like most fat people, each pound had a story attached to it. Each ounce was directly related to a rejection, a sad moment, a time when I didn't even feel worthy enough to express an emotion so I ate it instead. And I can't say that the changes in me are directly related to the lapband, but just making the choice to do it had a profound effect on how I talk to myself and therefore, how I view my own worth. The most important thing I do differently now is refuse to settle. I won't fill my body with shitty food because it's cheap or because I don't want it to go to waste. I won't stay in relationships that aren't uplifting and fulfilling. I wont belittle myself by behaving in a way that isn't true to me, I won't do work that deadens my soul. I don't spend time and money trying to find a less-expensive version of a particular "thing" I want. I save for it and get the real deal because I am worth it. I have learned that what we settle for is what we get out of life and I absolutely refuse to accept less than what I am worth these days. So yeah, there are parts of having a band that suck. I hate sliming and sticking and getting coffee "stuck" because I am too stressed out sometimes to get it past the band. And, I haven't lost as much weight as I thought I would by now. But would I change it? NOT ON YOUR LIFE> OR MINE.

Just checking in! We are approaching our one-year and I am still losing. Slow. But that is okay because I am comfortable with what I am eating, etc. I can keep this up long term. I have found that I can go weeks without losing anything and then one day,boom! 5 lbs gone. But I have always been weird that way. Sometimes, I can count like clockwork, 1 lb per week and other times, nothing or even a gain of a pound or two. I also notice that every couple of weeks, there may be a few days in a row where I can't eat much at all from constant PBs and a disinterest in food. On those days, I drink or eat soft foods. I seem to be going through one of those today. PBs are slowing down but increase when I am stressed out. I absolutely cannot eat on the run or in a stressful environment. I am trying to teach my husband and son that mealtimes are to be quiet and relaxed. :thumbup: I try to resist the urge to say, HEY! It's been a year, you should be further along! Because the truth is, I am better off than where I was when I started and, as long as its coming off, I am proud. When I first got my band, one of the first things I noticed was the nearly-instant relief from the guilt I had been carrrying about the damage I had done to my body by being so fat. I had a running dialogue in my head of arguments about my weight, imagining what people were saying about me and how I would respond. It's a lot quieter in my head now and, even if I never lost another ounce, that would be reward enough. I still haven't gotten on a good exercise program. Recently, I bought a BodyBlade but am so tired all the time, I have only used it once. Its pretty cool though. Meanwhile life goes on. My husband has been gone for most of our marriage and is leaving on another deployment soon. We moved. And my son is growing like a weed. I am working again and that has done wonders for my depression and attitude. I am still shopping in the Plus Size section. I had told myself I would not buy another plus sized outfit but things change. I am kind of a fashion whore and finally gave in because I like to wear cute clothes. I am faithfully rotating them out when they get too big, however. That reminds me, I was able to shop in Old Navy and can wear 1X in stretchy pants and 1 or 2X in most shirts. Before surgery, I was edging up to the 26-28 3-4X section. I am also wearing a size 16 jean right now....they are DG2 stretch jeans, but still..I consider it a victory especially since I had not worn jeans at all in decades. All in all I am still very pleased with my band and think it was the best thing, I ever did for myself.

Im here! I'm at 43 1/2 pounds lost. It seems to be coming off faster now.

I have Tricare south and they were awesome! I got in for surgery within weeks of my seminar. Tricare paid for all but about a hundred bucks. My doctor thought I had to pay more but ended up refunding me later. Anyway, call Tricare and ask for help finding a provider. You may be able to find one in a nearby town. Or just start making calls to other lapband surgeons within driving distance. It's worth it even if you have to drive an hour or two.

4 more pounds and I will be out of the 300s! I was told a few days ago that a friend who had not seen me in ten years didn't recognize me from current pics because I had gained so much weight. that was an eye opener. I hadn't thought that my body had changed all that much but he was right. From 1992-1993, I gained 100 pounds jumping from 170 to 270. I stayed there until 2007 when I ballooned up again after the birth of my son and a serious car accident. It is only now that I realize how much weight I gained in that year. In retrospect, I now see what those two life episodes had in common---depression! I have had two major depressive episodes and each one cost me dearly. So now I am recommitting to stay mentally healthy. Depression is such a sneaky bitch. I never know I'm in one until it's too late. Watch out depression. I'm watching you!

4 more pounds and I will be out of the 300s! I was told a few days ago that a friend who had not seen me in ten years didn't recognize me from current pics because I had gained so much weight. that was an eye opener. I hadn't thought that my body had changed all that much but he was right. From 1992-1993, I gained 100 pounds jumping from 170 to 270. I stayed there until 2007 when I ballooned up again after the birth of my son and a serious car accident. It is only now that I realize how much weight I gained in that year. In retrospect, I now see what those two life episodes had in common---depression! I have had two major depressive episodes and each one cost me dearly. So now I am recommitting to stay mentally healthy. Depression is such a sneaky bitch. I never know I'm in one until it's too late. Watch out depression. I'm watching you!

4 more pounds and I will be out of the 300s! I was told a few days ago that a friend who had not seen me in ten years didn't recognize me from current pics because I had gained so much weight. that was an eye opener. I hadn't thought that my body had changed all that much but he was right. From 1992-1993, I gained 100 pounds jumping from 170 to 270. I stayed there until 2007 when I ballooned up again after the birth of my son and a serious car accident. It is only now that I realize how much weight I gained in that year. In retrospect, I now see what those two life episodes had in common---depression! I have had two major depressive episodes and each one cost me dearly. So now I am recommitting to stay mentally healthy. Depression is such a sneaky bitch. I never know I'm in one until it's too late. Watch out depression. I'm watching you!

4 more pounds and I will be out of the 300s! I was told a few days ago that a friend who had not seen me in ten years didn't recognize me from current pics because I had gained so much weight. that was an eye opener. I hadn't thought that my body had changed all that much but he was right. From 1992-1993, I gained 100 pounds jumping from 170 to 270. I stayed there until 2007 when I ballooned up again after the birth of my son and a serious car accident. It is only now that I realize how much weight I gained in that year. In retrospect, I now see what those two life episodes had in common---depression! I have had two major depressive episodes and each one cost me dearly. So now I am recommitting to stay mentally healthy. Depression is such a sneaky bitch. I never know I'm in one until it's too late. Watch out depression. I'm watching you!

I haven't blogged in a long time. I don't know why. I think life (and the Words With Friends game) got in the way. Since we last talked, I got stuck and PBed twice. Both times were from not chewing well enough. It is a terrible feeling and I do not recommend it. I felt like I was choking but I could still breathe. I started to sweat and panic. MY heart raced. I felt like I wanted to belch or vomit. When it finally came up, it felt weird. The only way I can describe it is that it felt like vomitting from my esophagus. I have been super lucky and have been able to eat everything I want, just in smaller amounts. I have no problem with eggs or pasta or celery or any of the foods they warned me about. I haven't really tried soda since I never really drank much of it anyway. I have had a sip or two of my husband's Dr. Pepper and felt fine, though. I am still logging my food on MyFitnessPal and have only gone over budget once, by 5 calories (see the Chili's story below). I am even getting the proper amount of protein now, thanks to the Bolthouse protein drinks that taste awesome! Areas of weakness have been: 1) Cheese balls---About 10 years ago, my friend found THE BEST CHEESE BALL on the planet. They were called Krack-O-Pop and were sold at Walgreen's in a white bucket. We were sure they put crack in them, thus the name. They were that good. We bought all Walgreen's had. Then, they disappeared. Like Indiana Jones, I have been searching for the Holy Grail of Cheese Balls ever since. Leave it to me to get a lap band and finally find them. This brand is called Bickel's of York and I found them at Dollar General. The ones on the bottom taste almost like Krack-o-Pop. The problem is getting to the bottom. The first bucket, I ate over the course of 4 days. I could have eaten more because they go down easy, but I controlled myself. 4 days at 140 cals a pop...not too bad. But I would rather save those calories. Now, I am just wasting the ones on top, instead. This means I am paying 4.50 for a handful of bottom puffs but saving the calories makes it worth every penny. 2) Sweet Tea---I am addicted to sweet tea and fakes sugars taste yucky to me though I can handle Splenda in small amounts. So, when I go out, I either use the Splenda or I do half sweet/half unsweet. At home, I cut the sugar down to about 1/4 of what I used to have. Luckily, my taste for sweets has changed. Maybe it was all the fasting and pre/post dieting but the first time I took a sip of sweet tea from my favorite restaurant, I gagged because it was as sweet as syrup. 3) Tricky restaurants---We rarely eat out so when we do, I prefer a real restaurant with food cooked on the premises, as opposed to chain restaurants which are basically, glorified microwave eateries. HOWEVER, Hubs and I were recently seduced by the 20.00-per-couple deal at Chili's after a long day of walking around the Flea Market. For 20 dollars you get a salad, an appetizer, two entrees and a desert. I thought I chose wisely with no dressing on my salad, skipping the appetizer, and choosing the mini tacos. I ended up eating a few of Hubs appetizers because they looked really good, though. (They weren't) Then the entrees came. The mini tacos are not mini. They are regular sized, fyi. And the desert was a monstrosity of cake/cookie bar/syrupy/ice-creamy goodness. All in all, I ate half of the salad, a couple bites of cheese-fries, one taco, and 1/2 of the desert. So, imagine my surprise when I logged it later and found that I spent nearly my entire day's calorie ration on that one (mediocre) meal. Not happy! It reminds me of the time, preband, when I made the "right" choice to order salad instead of cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory. The salad ended up having more calories than the cheesecake. Not fair. Here is how the fill went: big table, waiting for the camera to warm up and talking with Doc about how restaurants trick you into eating their high-cal food. Then, a little stick into the port area for numbing. At this point, I was distracted with a big sip of barium and water by Nurse/PA. However, I happened to glance over at Doc and see the BIGGEST NEEDLE on the planet. I nearly passed out from fear and I am not afraid of needles. I turned away and felt nothing, luckily. Before I knew it, I was done. I forgot to ask how much he put in but he said it was "Just a little". I was actually surprised that Doc wanted to give me a fill at all. I thought I wouldn't get one unless I was gaining weight. He asked me if I felt any restriction. I wasn't sure how to answer. I mean, I haven't noticed "the band in action". I haven't felt "full" but I have felt satisfied. I am losing weight not feeling deprived, I figured it was all good. But he said it sounded like I needed a little fluid so I agreed. Aside from my lap-band stuff, we adopted another cat. Just what we need, I know. But I couldn't resist. His owner died and he had to leave all of his friends. He is a sweet fatty named Fred and I love him. Now, we have 4 cats, 2 dogs, and a bunny. I am also desperately looking for work. My husband was released with only a few week's warning (at Christmas) from his Army wounded warrior program--WTU. What that means is, he is unemployed except for his National Guard work once a month. After spending over a year in the program, trying to assimilate back to civilian life, he is finding that there is no work for him in law enforcement or security (or anywhere). Everyday, he tries to run back to the "security" of military life but even they don't have work for his specialties (Military Police and truck driver). I am worried he is going to freak out and volunteer for deployment or sign up with one of the Iraq/Afghanistan security outfits if he doesn't find something soon. He has already served 5 tours, has PTSD and has had foot surgery from military work. Enough is enough already! I just want him to find a civilian job and stay in the Guard for the next four years in order to get his retirement. Is that asking too much? There isn't much out there for me either. I tried freelancing but always get screwed in the end for payment. I have clients coming at me from everywhere but nobody can afford to pay me, it seems. My husband has banned me from taking any more volunteer, free or trade work. Though, I am secretly preparing medical illustrations to try and sell on istock. Employers who are looking for graphic designers seem to want cheap entry-level staff. I even had to "dumb down" my resume to apply for a lot of them and I am still overqualified. At this point, I will take anything. I even applied to work the stock room at Target. I love Target and wouldn't mind working in the back where I wouldn't have to deal with people. But they don't want me, either. (They might reconsider next week when I am too broke to shop there and they actually notice the difference on their sales sheets). So if any of you know anyone in the Dallas/Fort Worth area who needs a security professional (or anything that's outdoorsy), or a graphic designer, email me. You can check out samples of my work here: http://www.bettysoutherland.com

I can definitely feel a difference when I eat now. I just finished my kiddo's breakfast (about three mini pancakes, a bite of egg and a couple of blueberries) and I am stuffed. I started exercising yesterday. I wanted to go to the gym but didn't want to deal with packing a bag and hunting down my membership card. I just went for a walk instead. My once-broken ankle does not appreciate that. I also got food stuck last night and it was definitely chewed properly first. Now, I know what everyone meant by "slime" ew! In the meantime, I am going to snuggle up with my sick toddler on the sofa. We are watching big snow fall in Texas. That is always a beautiful site because it is so rare.

Well, crap. I thought I was doing very well, having lost 20 lbs. But I have read some of the posts on this thread and feel like I am behind the curve! I just had my first fill a few days ago. Before that, I didn't have much restriction.