irishstorm831

In my mid 20s, in an attempt to have children, I went on a radical diet and dropped 100 pounds.  I was able to have children and felt healthy for many years.  In my mid 30s I was dx with thyroid cancer and that's when I lost control of my weight again.  I quickly regained my lost 100 from my 20s plus added an additional 30 pounds.  The cancer didn't cause all of that weight gain, only the initial 20 pounds, but gaining weight, stress from worrying, staying home and not working, well all those things contributed to low self esteem and an eventually the regaining of all those pounds.Over the last 5 years, my health declined.  I had lost complete control over my ability to make healthy choices, and the bigger I got, the more depressed I became.  I ended up on so many heart medications, benzodiazepines for anxiety and antidepressants for depression.  I was a drugged, unhappy mother who was obese.  During a normal blood draw/work up (common for me as a post cancer routine), they noted I had low potassium, high blood pressure, elevated blood sugar and the doctor called me within an hour of my lab draw and instructed me to calmly drive myself to the local ER and he was admitting me immediately.  He met me at the ER and I was in a room and in a panic in two hours after that call.  I had done a very good job of not taking care of myself and medicating myself to the point that I was unaware and unconcerned with what was really going on with my body.During my five day stay in the hospital, I was dx with hypertension, heart disease and Type 2 diabetes.  I was sent home on ten medications daily, told to quit smoking, and a whole list of instructions telling me how my life would never be the same again.  This felt a lot like the day I was dx with cancer, however I'd done all this to myself a history of poor eating habits and lack of exercise. What happened?  I got angry.  I got what I like to call 'my irish on'.  I follow their instructions regarding my new medical diagnoses, but I slowly began a careful taper off all psychiatric medications.  It was time to drag myself out of the medically induced fog I had been living in.  I first attacked my benzo and took 4 months to slowly carefully taper off of it.  I then began to peel off the anti depressant as well.  While I was doing that, I attacked my diet.  I didn't like the idea of injecting meds into my belly in an attempt to control blood sugar or taking an oral pill 30 minutes before eating to combat the elevated sugar level after eating a carb heavy meal.  I knew i'd gotten myself into the mess I was in, I was certain I could get myself right on out of it.  I focused and stuck to a no more than 2-3 carb servings meals.  I would not allow myself more than 3 at any one meal.  I ate 3 meals a day with no snacks in between.  I began to feel a lot better, coupled with the medication withdrawal, I felt like my old self.  It wasn't easy and the weight fell off slowly but it was the first time in years it was going DOWN not up.  Always a good thing :)In the end, during the removal of psychiatric medications and the initial low carb diet, I dropped 50 pounds and was off all medications not medically necessary.  That still left me with a handful of pills i was taking daily but I was working on it.  My hypertension was under control, and was improving dramatically.  The weight loss and exercise allowed the doctors to reduce my medications twice to lower levels and I was thrilled.  I was beating the old habits and i was in control again.It was great.  Except, I plateaued.  I lost, perhaps, 5 pounds in a 4 month period while working so very hard to get more weight off.  I knew if I dropped another 20 pounds I would be able to go off the hypertension medications and the oral diabetes medications as well.This would be the time my primary physician sat me down and brought up the one subject I thought I'd never have to talk about again.  The regaining of the weight I had lost in my 20s.  He said to me:  I know it took you a long time to regain it, and I recognize and acknowledge that you went through a very stressful time with the cancer and that played a role in you losing focus on keeping the weight off.  However, with the comorbidities you have with weight gain, and the fact that losing the weight has directly positively impacted your health, I'd like to recommend you do something to ensure that the weight will not return.  I would like you to consider gastric banding.  I felt like a failure.  I felt like all I had done was not quite good enough.  I was shocked he felt it was an option for me at all.  I didn't think I even qualified although my BMI was over 35, barely, I was doing so well on my own.  He completely agreed and said the choice was mine, but that his biggest concern was that with my history of having lost copious amounts of weight only to regain them later meant we were in the woods not out of the woods.  I went home and thought long and hard about what I was going to do.  I decided he was right.  To truly ensure I would never again find myself facing the same daunting health issues I'd just dealt with, the gastric banding was an opportunity to further my weight loss success story while lowering my risk of ever regaining it.  I contacted a recommended facility, scheduled an appt for the seminar and surgeon appt.  I visited the facility, loved the people, the nurses and the doctor and was approved following a few minor hurdles.  Three weeks later I was in surgery and banded with no complications.  Three weeks post op now, I am now off all ten of those medications minus the thyroid medication I take and the nexium I have been on since I was 20.  Every single hypertension medication is gone.  All the diabetic medications are gone.  I am no longer taking cardiac medications and a follow up visit with my cardio doctor has allowed me to shake his hand, and say 'see you if I need you'.  I am no longer required to take my blood sugar 4x a day.  Now I take it only if I feel I'm 'off' a little bit.  I am down 14.3 pounds as of today.  It isn't easy.  No major change that is worth is ever is.  You can't get outside of the house without going through a door, and you can't lose weight without determination.  Time will tell if I've made all the changes needed to be fully successful, but I can say I'm very proud of myself right now.Oh, and by the way?  I did quit smoking.  :)