BayougirlMrsS

@Xx1jpt5xx... Not trying to sound hateful, but, she sounds like a controlling person. No one should be made to feel like they have to choose... My now ex-husband was the same way. When i told him i was thinking about having WLS back in 2009 he said I was just being lazy and should be able to lose weight like everyone else... Told him the loss was not my problem, it was keeping it off. He did everything in his power to get me to change.. even scheduling a "bike ride" (Motorcycle) during my liquid diet week. Which turned out to be the biggest blessing of all. The week we were gone there was a massive layoff and i was to be one of them. I would have lost my insurance and had to cancel... So joke was on him. He never took care of me, my daughter in law did. He didn't miss a chance to tell me that i was a failure and the only reason i lost weight was that i had a "surgical body".... He would tell me..... You know, you were prettier when you were fat, cuz i couldn't see all those wrinkles on your face..... or, that i looked like a bag of bones..... or the only reason you want to lose weight is to get another man..... He was horrible. In the end, i was married to him for 26 years. When i told him i wanted a divorce it was like a thousand tons was lifted. "most" all of my friends that have had WLS are divorced now. It really takes a toll on ALL relationships. Not just marriages, but friends and family too. Everything in your life will change. Some good, some bad. But it will change. It's your choice.... She doesn't have to live in your body... Just you.

Same here... Had SX on the Wednesday and back to work on Monday.

Love....!!!!! is this a Shein??? It looks amazing.

I wish i could wear jeans every day.... but i sit at the front of the office. Not the receptionist... but i am the first face people see.... ugh. I absolutely love these jeans.... https://www.buckle.com/.../sku.../size-27/dimension-31

Trust in the fact that you will awaken and emerge from the darkness.... You have to start believing in yourself. Know that better days will come. There will be bad days and good days.... You have to keep reminding your self that you are great, you are beautiful, you are getting healthy and YOU DESERVE BETTER..... I too have a hard time getting out of my own head...so i completely understand. I found out this weekend that my "mentor" Paula and her wife are getting divorced. This comes as a complete shock....Not sure all the details. She had the LB a year or so before me and just a few years ago had the sleeve done. She has lost no weight with the sleeve. Her wife had her LB placed a the same day as me. She has put back a lot of weight.

So I went back to find this post I made YEARSSSSSSS AGO and a reply i made a couple of years later. This is when i still had my Lapband (didn't come out till March 2017). Since then I got divorced and remarried.... Band removal and Sleeve revision (aug. 28, 2019). Posted April 25, 2013 I have not always needed you.... and one time in my life.. i was a "normal" person. Size 0-3... weigh a whopping 100lbs. Back in my single day... then one day you meet a wonderful guy and you fall in love... ahhh things are great. You get married and have a beautiful son. and life is good.... but then you notice that you’re not happy as you use to be. some days are worse than others... you find the strength to get up every day and go to work and live a "normal" life. Things are good at home... but something is missing... that spark, that feeling you use to get when you and your spouse were together intimately .. and you notice that those time has gotten further and further apart. and you think, what is going on? and one day the reason is staring you right in the face... the mirror... but in that mirror is someone else... surely, it's not me... I don't look like that... that's a ugly fat girl... i'm not ugly and i for damn sure am not fat. Can't be... i told my self-years ago i would NEVER like myself look like... those people... but then you look closer... and closer and there. i know those eyes.... those are my eyes... but why do they look so sad. I have happy eyes. and i see, i see the real me. the one others have been seeing for years.... how did i not see this... how did i let myself get like this ... how did i become that girl that now had to shop at the plus-size store... when just yesterday i was a size 3... How did i become the girl the skinny girls are not looking at and saying... i'll never let myself look like HER... and i'm the HER. this feeling takes the very last shred of self-confidence and stomps it into the dirt and spits on it. and you think...i am ugly i am fat i am unworthy of love.... unworthy of feeling good. and you start to eat... more and more and everything keeps getting worse. you stop taking care of yourself, stop dressing up stop wearing make-up and fixing your hair.... stop putting forth the effort at all... You are now sitting in a deep dark cave, alone and no one or nothing can show you the light.... But one day... you open your eyes expecting to see nothing... complete darkness and there it is... a speck of light.... it's tiny, but just right there in front of you. and you squint to see it.... making sure it's really there. that speck was my friend Paula... she had lb surgery and every day we talked and every day my light grow brighter.... I went to the doctor and did all the tests... did it all and the news that i was approved... OH ... JOy. I looked in the mirror and saw a glimmer of hope. But as the days grew closer... I started to think... WHAT IF... what if i die on the table, what if i fail at this too, what if i stayed fat forever... Then i saw this site...trolled for a long while. I didn't want to sign because, well what if someone knew me... the horror... Then i saw all the successive people... the beautiful woman and handsome men that in their before pictures looked so sad... sad like me. Then i saw the after pictures. and all the happy smiling faces... people who were bigger than me... now wearing size 6 jeans (lellow)... and i thought, i can do this i can get my life back.... I will be happy again. so on November 10, 2009... i awoke... was re-born. and i did do it... i lost 80lbs... it took me longer than most, but i don't care. I have donated all the 12-14-16 & 18 and moved into my own size 6... On Feb 15, 2012.... after a long hard fight.... i won and awarded myself a tummy tuck... i deserved it. I earned it.... so to my band... thank you... for sticking with me and always keeping me on track. and too all you out there thinking about doing this.....search within yourself and be happy again... whichever way you choose..... blessings..... Posted March 31, 2015 Ak.... congrats on deciding to make a change in your life. I re-read my post and im terrible in grammar... lol.... but it made me cry a little... to think back at how sad i really was. And to admit, i have started feeling that way again.... Not that i am "fat" by normal standards, im still a size 8. But i have put back 20 and feel defeated somewhat. Scared... too. Scared of the unknown, of the what if's.... What if i can't get my ass back in gear and do what i know i can. Depressed because i have no support at home with my husband. Who just yesterday said that my LB was a "hobby"... can you believe that... A Hobby... He hates that im no longer "fat"... he said.... your not fat, you're thick.... where other men will tell me im Hot, beautiful, sexy... not him... im thick. We went through a time where sex was great... 2-3 times a week... which was a vast improvement from 1-2 a YEAR... We are now back at 1-2 a month.... if im lucky. February 14, 2020 Well, I did lose that 20 i put back and in fact did lose another 10... I soon after i decided that there was a lot more to the reason i was so unhappy. My ex was still very verbally abusive and very unsupportive. He still hated my weight loss. Still was not being intimate with me... and it got back down to 1-2 a year. Found out that he was in fact sleeping with another woman (he never admitted it). I talked with him and begged him to do counseling... he said no, that there was nothing wrong with him. So I sat down on the couch and said, if things don't change, i'm filing for divorce. Of course, he didn't believe me... but i pulled up my big girl "thongs" (hehe) and filed.... After he realized i was standing my ground, now he wanted counseling.... NOPE.. too late i was done and completly checked out. The marriage ended after 26 years. The day i said i was filing... it was like a thousand tons had been lifted. I started dating and found that men (and women) wanted me. I felt so good about myself. I even posted a profile on Match... and yes that is where i found Tim. I sware he is the last of a dying breed..... perfect gentleman, so kind and loving and giving.... has excepted me for me... He loves me thin, thick (gained 30lbs after band removal) and loves me now.... Thin again. He tells and shows me every day how much he appreciates me.... and it's such a wonderful feeling. So as of today, i'm 51 years old, still 5'2", CW 133.4, Current size 4.... Sleeve done Aug 28, 2019. So im 25 weeks PO. Got married on September 26, 2019..... I am the happiest i have ever been..... Loving me

OOTD.... This top was a gift from Tim for Christmas. He originally bought a large and had to send it back for a small. Maker https://tylerboe.com/.... cashmere... it's so awesome... and i am really loving these new jeans. They are perfect. Got them at Buckle's... size 27x31.5 https://www.buckle.com/bke-stella-tailored-boot-stretch-jean/prd-14410ABK193/sku-1408962731/size-27/dimension-31

I want to see them too..... I will post our date picture tomorrow.

@mexicanwrestler My two cents.... In Mid 2009 I started looking into getting WLS. I had tried everything to lose and i did... but could never keep it off. I did my research and found that i could get the Lapband done with only paying my co pays. ($2000). I found out what i needed to do to qualify and within a couple of months i was approved. This is when my NOW x husband started giving me the same as your BF. You don't need that, you can do it on your own, just exercise more... blah blah blah.... I finally stood my ground and said, NO, I'm doing this. I was 42, 5'2" and 232lbs. One thing i had going for me was that i had no other health issues at the time. My x tried everything to get me to not have the WLS. In my brain, if i lost the weight he would love me more and would want to have sex with me again (1-2 x a year) and be proud of me.... NOPE... If anything the WL made it worse. It made all of his insecurities surface. He hated me losing weight and hated, even more, the attention i got from it. He hated my self-confidence i gained. I started standing up for myself. The more i lost, the more control he lost over me. At this time we had been married about 19-20 years. Mind you, when we got married i was all of about 100lbs.... very tiny size 0. I realized our marriage was a very unhappy one... for me that was. He was happy, he had a wife that did everything. He was the most selfish self-centered person ever... and still is. I could write a whole page on just that... You have to ask yourself.... why do you want WLS? are you ready for everything to change? are you ready for who you will become? are you ready to move on with your life if need be? are you ready to lose bf, family, friends? are you ready...... for your whole life to change? Go into the before and after pictures... look i would say 90% of the before pics. Most every one is so sad, hiding, or had to do some real searching to even find a before pic. Because no matter what we all may think, we are/were very unhappy people. Easily controlled because of all our insecurities. My thoughts.... I'm so fat, no other man will want me, at least this one does 1-2 times a year. I didn't want to be alone. Then look at the after pictures.... i would say 99% are soooo happy and now want to be in pictures, want to participate in life and think... I look pretty good... Then the opposite sex starts to notice you and that will become intoxicating... Your confidence with sore... and you will learn that you are worth happiness, you deserve happiness. You deserve to be healthy because i can tell you your health will only get worse. And the older you get, the harder it is to lose weight. I never for one day regretted my WLS..... My husband now (just got remarried in Sept.) treats me like a queen.... I have my confidence back and he loves showing me off.... He is proud of me and i'm proud of me. I'm going to try and find a post i made here Yearssss ago about how i felt. If i can i'll repost it.

To tell or not to tell.... well that depends on how much you want people in your business and telling YOU what they think YOU should do and be...... Because trust in the fact that once you tell them, they will have an opinion. In 2009 when i had the band SX at first i only told family and a few close friends.... Well family told and so did the friends before i knew it..... EVERYONE knew.... and EVERYONE had something to say.... Mostly woman. Men were, good for you you look great. Woman were, you didn't need that, you weren't fat enough, or... I know of 2 people that died from WLS... Can't you just lose it with diet and exercise...?.... Really, of course, i can.. but keeping it off is a whole other problem. Then after they will start with the.... your too thin, how much are you going to lose.... blah blah blah..... So then i had to have my band removed and put back 30lbs.... and i know those same people were looking at me and waiting for me to get back up to 232lbs...... Hell no. So, in those years, i divorced my husband of 26 years (he was not a supporter and hated my WL). Started dating an incredible man... He got a work promotion and asked me to move with him. My kids are grown and nothing to hold me back.... So i moved with him. I went from a town where everyone knows everyone to... NO ONE knew me.... In August i had the sleeve done (paid OOP 14K). I told my co-workers i was having a hernia repair (which was true). They also knew i was dieting for my pending wedding (we married this past September), so the WL was very excepting. Still only he knows and that's the way it will stay. It's sooooooo much better not telling. Not that im embarrassed... im not, it's just easier. 5'2" band SW 232 BMI 42, Sleeve SW 173.5 BMI 31.7............... today, 133.4 BMI 24.4 (Normal weight) I never had any co morbids.... not even at my heaviest.

@MarvelGirl25 It went great.... lost 10lbs since last visit. down a total of 40lbs. That an average of 1.6lbs per week. I'll take that. My band surgery was the same... lost about 2lbs per week for a while. Then i hit 143 and that where it stayed for yearsssss. At one point i had started putting on a few, but then my pants were too tight and i said.... no way chris... you didn't come this far to f it up now. Yes Dr. Carroll has been wonderful I think a huge part of success is a good support system. I didn't have that with the band. I was still successful, but i think it could have been more and for sure it could have been better. My husband is the most amazing man.....my supporter. Pretty much anything i need or want.

I weigh myself every morning... I don't get down on myself for stalls. Because i have been down this road before, i know that things can change quickly..... I found i will stall a few days and then bam!!! 1-2lbs. Just take it as it comes. If you are weight training... this could be why you stalled also.... i know after band removal and pre sleeve... i was doing crossfit and the scale was not my friend....

Watch out for the almonds and protein bars.... the bars sometimes are loaded with sugar.

Didn't i tell you the swelling would go down..... You look HOTTTTT perfection.

I know you don't want to hear this (i didn't) but you have to track your food.... if only to see where your cals are coming from. Good job with the turkey... not so good with the crackers and "stuff". I'm wondering if your eating a lot of nuts too. I have a quiche in the morning. My husband cooks one most every Sunday for the week... Eggs, cheese, bacon, green onions. Lunch is normally cucumber with homemade dressing (fresh basil, fresh parsley, garlic, EVOO, balsamic vinegar, S&P). Dinner is up in the air... I try to not snack,... but i found strawberries, deli meats (salami, persutto, etc) And if i'm still hungry.... smash up a sweet potato or cut up an avocado. I get up and do something... clean, wash clothing, go walk, exercise. Are you exercising? If not, you need too. Two rules to weight loss..... EAT LESS/BETTER AND MOVE MORE.

I could have sworn i checked into this thread... if i did I can't find it. So here i am... Checking in now... Late to the party. I "originally" got to this site back in 2009 when it was called LapbandTalk.... I was banded back 11/10/2009. I am 5'2" and that SW was 232lbs. I was 42 years old and married. Lost and stayed at 143lbs for Yearsssss... well until my beloved Tina had to be removed. I got a bad case of the flu and threw up violently and slipped my band... it was a terrible day. So March 23, 2017 I became WLS...less... No more tool. Up till then i was a model bandmember.... Over the last few years, I regained 30lbs.... I had started looking for a dr. to do a revision, but kept being told i didn't "weigh enough"... I was fixing to head to Mex when i stumbled on the dr. i have now.... He said the fact that I was a previous WLS pt he could do a revision.... Yeahhhhh... So Aug 21, 2019 I started my liquid diet... at 173.5lbs. 31.7BMI. SX was August 28, 2019. SX weight 165. Today, almost 24 weeks PO I weighed in this am at 133.4..... down 40lbs.... Lost the 30 i had gained post band removal and another 10..... so happy. After 26 years of marriage, it fell apart. A lot due to the WL and his NEVER supporting my SX. Then he got very jealous... He couldn't handle the men hitting on me.... and i couldn't handle it either.... the attention was intoxicating. I have since met and remarried the most amazing man.... Our last conversation... Me: i can cook a meal at home for Valentine's day. Him: no, i want you to get all dressed up so i can show you off... Band sizes.... 20 pants, 2xl shirt, 7.5 shoe, 44H bra..... After, 6 pants, lg/xlg shirt, 7 shoe, 34H/G bra Sleeve.... 10 pants, lxg shirt, 7 shoe, 36H/G bra..... Today... SIZE 4 PANTS, SMALL/MED SHIRT, 6.5 SHOE & 32G BRA..... I'm having trouble eating the amount of cal/prot. i should be... i find i can eat about 4 bits and i'm done. My hair is falling a bit (thank god i have a lot). Please tell me how yall are doing... Today i go for a check-up and talk with the dr. on my progress. can't wait to see what he says.

I measured this am.... 5'2"... today 133.5.... Down 40 lbs Breast: 39, Waist: 31.5, Hips: 39.... Looks like im a consistent 4 in most everything. A few brands a 6 is best.... But most of them the waist is a little big and i have to now wear a belt.

The shirt is as old as the days long..... but the jeans are new.... Buckles size 27"... reg size 4.... These jeans make me look i have some what of a butt....

congrats..... i think we need pictures.... hehe

and don't forget....... the right amount of money. JF has had wayyyyyy plenty of PS. Not that there is any thing wrong with that.... i would just like to see what she would really look like at her age. I watch her on Gracie & Frankie... JLo is just amazing... i mean shes 50 and has the body any one would want... (me i'm any body)....

I fell in love with Christina Hendricks... Mad Men..

@ms.sss i heart you too

Post plastics blues is a thing.... i had them. I related it to my ex-husband.... he hated the fact that i did it and never missed an opportunity to remind me that i had a "surgical" body.... and that was just too lazy to do it the "natural" way.... He made me feel so bad about myself all the time.

I promise you the swelling will go down.... but you have to do your part... Wear your compression garment 23 hours a day.... I only took mine off to shower and air dry for 1 hour.... I too got lazy after the TT. Stopped going to the gym, but when i started putting weight back on (when i had the band) it was for me to get back on track with my eating and bam... i would drop the few i would put on... I've been hovering around 134-135 for the last couple weeks... maybe this is where my body wants to be.... Still you look amazing.... your deff girl crush material....