BJean

laurend!!!! You're back. I was gone too for a while and I wondered why I didn't find any posts by you when I came back. YEA - you're banded!!! Welcome to bandland. I hope you're doing well. By now you should be past the shoulder pain part. How are you doing otherwise?

So Mark, if you have no teeth, how do you strain the moss as it passes through? Are you the most popular boy in your dance class?

Just shows how sports illiterate you are, Green. It's Pete Rose, and he's all about the sport of betting.

Well I hope you people are happy!! I started reading this thread hours ago and now it's almost midnight and I have to get up early and it's all your fault!!! What a GREAT thread! I've experienced the whole gamut of emotions while reading your stories. And re-lived some of my own. There's a lot of wisdom, love and pain on this thread. The thing we women miss the most about not having sex is the intimacy. Pure and simple. The closeness with our man, the unconditional love that we feel when we surrender ourselves to our significant other, the fact that we are naked with them and accepted and loved, no matter how we look. We need it for our very existence. Sure, we can live without it if we have to. But it tends to suck the breath right out of us if we go too long without the closeness, the intimacy that sex with our man provides. I am no phychologist but I'm pretty sure that if we have lived without sexual contact and intimacy with our husbands/boyfriends for very long, it is an indication that we may have self-esteem issues. Low self-esteem also goes along with obesity, they say. We need to take a long hard look at why we put up with it and what reasonable measures can be taken to figure out a resolution to the problem. Because it definitely IS a problem. One of the best things I read on this thread was when nume130 said that she and her DH had a heart-to-heart and they have verbalized what they both knew was true. They need to be free to find the love and intimacy with someone else that is woefully lacking in their marriage. Thank God that you are thinking seriously about getting on with your life. I feel cheated for you! Believe me, your children will do just fine without the two of you living under the same roof. Yes, they'll be upset if you divorce, but once they are adult and experience more of life, they will realize that there was an insurmountable problem and you will eventually earn their respect, not their scorn, for thinking enough of yourself to get out of that unworkable, unfixable marriage. As for those of you who have no libido because of Lexapro or Prozac - listen to me... very important operating tip... Wellbutrin XL!!!!! I have a great libido now for the first time in many years. It is as if I am back at age 30 in the sex department. It may not work as well for you, but it is darn sure worth a try! As for sexual relationships before marriage. I was 19 and a virgin when I got married the first time. My wedding night was a nightmare as were many, many nights after that. We were married for 4 years and I never experienced anything but pain and frustration when we had sex. We had a baby after we'd been married for 3 because I knew that in our Church there was no way anyone would condone a divorce and I was grasping at anything to help me keep the marriage together (yes, I was really dumb.) After the divorce, I made a promise to myself that I would never marry again unless or until I had spent some time with him in bed. By gosh sex is way too important to think it will just work itself out. As for the kiss, OMG, what a beautiful description of the perfect kiss!!! That is the one thing that my DH has never really mastered. He's too focused on what is to follow, I'm afraid. I have been kissed like that before though and it is something very, very special!!! Ok. Now back to the brutality of Rants and Raves. Thanks for letting me vent my spleen here. You guys are absolutely wonderful!!!!

I find your beliefs to be very interesting, Derrick. I honestly didn't know if you were right wing or not. But the interesting part, from what you've just revealed about your beliefs, is that you appear to be for human rights. That's why being pro-war seems out of character. My primary opposition to the war is not economical, it is purely out of concern for all the lives that are being lost over there. I know some people believe that our presence in Iraq is keeping this country safe from terrorists. I just happen to disagree with that logic. I see nothing that proves that to be the case. In fact there are some strong indications that the terrorists are becoming stronger and better funded...only to one day possibly make 9/11 pale by comparison. Just think how long it took them between the first World Trade Center bombing and 9/11, and look at the difference between those two acts in effectiveness.

Reading your posts makes me so thankful that I got the band. I feel like a failure sometimes because I haven't lost in the past couple of months, but I know that I would be binging and gaining weight if I didn't have the band! In a funny sort of way, you're inspiring me with your true confessions. I've done some confessing of my own, early on, but I'd forgotten how I felt back then. Thanks for sharing, ya'll! P.S. Please don't give up on the pre-surgery diet. It is really important that you get your liver down in size. You'll do it! I know you will. If you're that hungry, I'll bet you could have something solid in the way of protein - no carbs - that would make you feel more full. I am like you, I don't like all the sweet stuff they say you can have. I finally did a little better with plain yogurt and believe it or not, cottage cheese. Hang in there... it is so worth it!

That's okay Derrick. My tolerance today is less for the right-wing neo-cons than it was yesterday, so I certainly understand.

Well if you think about it Green, in Mexico there's the very wealthy and the very poor with not so much in between. In Canada, it sounds like the middle class is a larger percentage of the population. Which is how it used to always be in the U.S. However, things have begun to slide here. Like Marimaru noted, the top people in corporations here are making huge salaries and bonuses and they're paying as low a wage scale as they can manage for the men and women who are the backbone of their companies. My parents taught me a work ethic that is hardly relevant today. They said that if you work for someone, you should always be loyal. If you can't feel loyal, leave. Never work for someone, take their money, and not be able to support them and what they stand for. Today it has become silly to teach our children that. Corporations are huge and they are impersonal, and they have no loyalty toward their empoyees. Most corporate bigwigs are only looking at the bottom line, which is what their bonuses are based on. They don't want to know or care about the lifestyle or problems of the "little man" that works for them. So I ask you, why should employees feel loyal to people like that? There are a few companies who do look after their employees. Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream, Hewlet Packard, and others and people clamor to work for them. They are successful and the pride of workmanship is apparent in their products. Plus I'm pretty sure Ben, Jerry, Mr. Hewlett & Mr. Packard (if those last two exist) are living a very comfortable life. Maybe they're not on the billionaire list, but I feel sure that they sleep at night.

Well thank goodness that's overwith! I was worried about you.

Great karey!! Who else would like to join the party??

A friend of mine, whose husband was a pharmacutical rep, needed to go for a GYN checkup. She didn't know any since they were new to the area. Her DH had just visited with a new GYN in the area and he seemed very nice. Plus, he wanted to be supportive and win a new customer for his business. So he told my friend his wife, who was probably 75 lbs. overweight, that she should try him. She did. After the appointment, she called me in tears. She said she'd had the most humiliating experience of her life. Seems the young Doc was doing the exam and his wife was his assistant. When he uncovered her breasts to check for lumps, he said "Oh My GOD!!!" Honey, come here, look at these! These are the biggest breasts I've ever seen in my life!!" The wife came and took a look and agreed that they were huge! My good friend said she had to lie there through the pelvic, while she was totally mortified, face beet red and couldn't wait to get the hell out of there. I wanted to go punch that a-hole in the face myself!!! :angry

Thanks for the info, Lisa.

Derrick I hope you feel good to have gotten your snipe at me out. I am not stupid. You may not agree with me, but it doesn't make me stupid. Your second paragraph is suspect, however. If you think that, I am amazed. I prefer to think you just posted it for effect. I am not anti-war in general. I am anti-war when we are wrong. Bush's bombing of Iraq is quite different than any other time our country has bombed other countries, with the exception of Viet Nam, of course. When we discovered that his father had a secret operation called "The Iran Contra Affair" and it was made public, we thought we would never see a president pull something that bad again. Turns out his son is more than willing to use his power to do whatever he thinks is right, no matter what our intelligence tells us, our military advises, or the public at large expects. The fact that some people are still supportive of the war in Iraq is what is stupid. :phanvan

Man, more power to you if you can eat ribs! And be careful when you try the pork chop. I had a veal chop at a fancy restaurant a week ago and I was in pain for hours. I PB'ed many times before I found the problem was a tiny piece of the chop. It was incredibly embarrassing. I had to leave the table early on in the evening and then regularly about every 15 minutes until everyone else had finished and then they had to pull the car over for me on the ride back to the hotel once and then I fought it in my room for about an hour afterwards before I finally got that tiny little bit back up and out. I don't mean to be grossing any of you out, but I am telling you so that perhaps you will be extremely careful when trying dense meats!! I am sure that since we were with a good sized group I probably didn't chew it my normal 32 (minimum) times. I thought I was being careful, but it tasted incredible and I am sure that I got anxious for my next bite and swallowed too quickly. Unfortunately, I had just started my meal. I only had eaten a couple of small bites of the chop. They boxed the whole meal up for me, but I couldn't stand to look at it much less eat it. And to add insult to injury, it was a $35 entree. :omg: You all be careful!!!! I never thought I would allow an event like that to happen! :phanvan

I seem to be the only one who is really struggling right now. My knees are finally enough better that I'm getting some decent low-impact exercise. So far it has only toned me a little and I haven't lost anything, but I know that's how it goes initially when you start exercising after being "dormant" for a while. I still have days when my knees bother me, but those days are getting fewer and farther between!!! I am so thrilled with that you just can't imagine. Summer is really crazy for everybody because of vacations, but for those of us who still need to lose quite a bit of more weight, maybe we should re-group in September - at our 1 year mark - and set new goals and have a new challenge for inspiration. Right now I would be up to start a new challenge, but I don't know if there are any other takers. We could do something between now and the one year mark because I'm going to be pretty depressed if I don't lose a significant amount by then. So many of you have lost so much - like 100 LBS!!! - and I'm still at the same place I was at 4 months after surgery. Sound off - any takers for now or later?? :nervous

Well if the numbers we keep hearing the news all the time are correct - somewhere around 12 million illegals living in this country - you know that many large corporations must be giving them jobs, not just the growers in California. It seems that maybe the observations that Green's DH made in Mexico are widespread down there, it is not any wonder that the bill that came up for consideration recently was so generous to the illegals. We don't want them to leave since it would mean even more jobs leaving the country. Another thing I've wondered about is that if we make them legal with proper documentation and they begin to pay into the system, i.e., taxes, insurance, medical, etc., they won't be able to live with the low wages either. I mean some people here make it sound as if American workers are so greedy and lazy that they refuse to take menial labor jobs. I'm not so sure that is always the case. Maybe they just can't afford to work for those wages what with the taxes, insurance, medical and stuff Americans are required to take care of every day. Illegals are in many cases using the system but not paying for it and therefore they can afford to take the jobs with very low wages.

Well color green, lucky. Er, color green, green, you lucky duck. :whoo: I sure hope that did the trick. If you weren't having terrible cramps and spasms, it may have just been a touch of gastroenteritis or somethin'. The acidophlous has baled me out more than once!

It must be getting really late because your post made me giggle hysterically. I have a feeling that we agree about scoundrels in office and presidents who use their power to do things that are immoral. At any rate, this has been fun, but I have to give it a rest. I hope I didn't highjack the thread with all this. Afterall, current events are what make the world go 'round.

Gee, I'm sorry. I obviously misunderstood your motives. Does that mean though that you are against all presidential pardons? Was that your point? You were pointing out that we have a couple of bad presidents, Clinton and Bush, because they've used their power to pardon criminals?

I have not read or heard anything about the costco or Tyson corporations hiring large numbers of illegal immigrants. I patronize Costco and buy Tyson chicken products, but I will happily cross them off my shopping list if I find out for sure that they knowingly hire illegals for their work force. One aspect to the cost of goods that we might want to address is that hiring cheap labor is not just to keep the cost of goods down for the American consumer - it is to ensure larger profits for the corporations. in some cases astronomical profits. Greed is the biggest problem with corporations and our government today. And corporations and the government are the biggest problems when it comes to encouraging people to enter this country illegally. Eva you really do come off as someone who isn't being very objective at all about this issue. It is not as simple as Americans just being compassionate for people who need a better life. It isn't as simple as stating that the U.S. is a melting pot. There is a huge difference between our ancestors who immigrated to this country legally and those who come here illegally. People who come here illegally and who take (or send) as much money as they can back to their country of origin, who do not pay their fair share in taxes and insurance, but who do take advantage of government programs and our educational and health systems in this country do not deserve to be considered in the same favorable light as legal immigrants! Yes, they need a better life. Yes, our government and corporations have made it possible for them to live here against the law. But those things do not make us want to simply greet them with open arms as we do those people who are made to achieve certain standards and go through the required legal channels before they come here.

L8RBloom: I got just as sick and tired of hearing about Watergate! However I do believe that as embarrassing as Clinton's antics in office were, there just IS NO comparison when speaking to the horrible decisions of this administration and the impact they have had and will continue to have way into the United States' future. Everytime I think about that night, so long ago, when George Bush bombed a city and called it "shock and awe" and expected this country to be proud of his actions is utterly unbelievable! To compare the two people just makes no sense at all to me. It's like tossing a red herring into the discussion. Yes, you're right, our perspective depends on our politics. Both sides are guilty, but it is still very annoying when it doesn't really prove anything. Sometimes all it does is give us a chance to post something when we don't have a good rebuttal to an attack.

Ditto what Green said, Mark!

Well normally Green, a good steak stays in your system for days and days, but in your case.....:rolleyes Bitter you positively crack me up!:heh: I'm slated to cook a big chunk 'o meat for the fam tomorrow, either in the oven or on the grill. I had fully planned to make the barbeque sauce recipe posted earlier, but didn't get the Laphriong Scotch that it requires. I don't know how critical that ingredient is, but I am under the impression that it is one of the things that makes the sauce so special. :hungry:

I know Boo Boo Kitty!! I kind of put my hands in front of my face and look through my fingers, like in a horror movie! green: Choosing the doctor is the biggie for me. If you are confident about your doctor, and have seen his work, that's more than half the battle! I hope you'll think about posting before and after photos. Rhinovirus? Have you finally FINALLY had the test? Been diagnosed and getting the proper meds? Or are you still being a panty waist? So to speak... :omg:

Actually it got very complicated after that. She went into a big thing about turning it over to God and just praying on it. What she didn't understand, or even try to understand, was that I wasn't sorry for my mom or sister to be in a better place (especially since they both died a painful death from metastatic breast cancer) but that I missed them and the love and good times that we shared. It was comforting to me to recall some of the wonderful and funny things that they did. She was uncomfortable anytime I mentioned either of them and I generally only mentioned them in the context of relating a funny incident or sweet gesture that they made on my behalf. They were both very great women. The short answer is, NO. We are not still friends. Well, she still calls from time to time, but I learned that I am a much happier person without her in my life on a daily basis. I am sure that I learned a lot from our relationship, but we took the friendship as far as it could go. There was just nothing left to love about it. It's interesting that there is a person here at LBT whose posts often remind me very much of my former friend. The LBT poster and I are politically polar opposites and most of what she posts sounds just like my former friend. She seems to believe that she is "holier than thou" but in reality, she seems to have a pretty black heart. I am sure that is why her threads and posts irritate me so much. I appreciate your empathy!