BJean

Oh, I see. I never thought of that. Thanks for clearning that up for us. The sky is falling faster today than it was in the 60's when the fundamentalists said we only had a little bit of time before the second coming. Thank goodness we have such Enlightened folks to map it all out for us. I'd hate to be left down here on earth while you're floating up to the heavens.

plain, no one can blame you for feeling scarred and a bit beaten with what you've gone through. But please know that the problems were within your spouse, not necessarily with you. A much older woman was giving me a hard time because I had reached another milestone birthday and was whining about it. I complained that I can't do everything that I've always been able to do and I find that some of the most mundane tasks seem difficult. She told me two things that I found wisdom in that I'd like to share with you. 1) If you live in the past and long for anything in your past you will not be living in the present and it will definitely doom your future. 2) Don't focus on the things you can't do anymore. Figure out the things that you can do and DO THEM with gusto! She's a vibrant, attractive 70 year old woman and she thinks that she still has lots of living to do and good times to be had. Who can argue with that? There are good times right around the corner. If your ex had the need to do what she did, you can't control that. But you can keep her actions from controlling the rest of your life. You don't need any woman to make you happy. You need to find happiness within yourself and then if there's a person who finds her way into your life and wants to share the joy, then it will be great. Ok. Off my soapbox. I have a special fondness for you plain. I want you to enjoy your life because when you turn 50 everything goes into overdrive and it's truly scary to realize that you wasted some of your best years! P.S. I just got back from a Yellowstone/Grand Teton vacation. I rode a horse 5 miles through the wilderness, crossing rivers and negotiating cliffs with rocky switch backs and learned to fly fish and then rode the 5 miles back for a full day of rigorous activity that I never, ever would have been able to do even last year. I had given up on my obese, depressed self. And now I'm on the top of the world. This winter I'm going snow skiing! And I actually had a man flirt with me at the QT while I was getting fuel for my car this morning! And he was hot!

lrya: Philosophical debate is what we do here. It's fun. You should try it. You'd be surprised how much you can learn by not only reading things from people with whom you agree, but also reading posts by those you disagree with.

When Pat Robertson said that God's wrath was raining down on New Orleans via the hurricane I'm sure he probably said that the oil spill was more of God's wrath. Except wait a minute, Robertson's favored folks - the wealthy - have been hit in their pocketbooks by the oil spill. How has he been explaining that? What an absurd idea that God plays a role in blessing people with wealth and making sure that others never achieve wealth or his blessings because they're ignorant of what patty and others are claiming that faith in God is all about. Rich people and poor people believe in God and have been born again. It isn't about wealth or health or happiness. Pat Robertson is a self-serving person who is bad to the bone. And folks keep sending their hard-earned money to him, thinking that in some way God will favor them for doing it. If God works that way we are very unfortunate to have a creator who is that hateful. It's like someone who adopts a dog and whips their dog when it doesn't instantly obey a command. But in truth, the pet is just an animal with totally different thought processes and needs than their owners. If God worked that way he'd make sure that the born again Baptist church team wins all the baseball games and the poor ignorant sand lot team loses every time. It's as backward as thinking that Zeus will strike you down with his lightning and Eros will bless you with a loving companion.

Don't worry, if she did she'd be able to justify it.

I chew gum with no side effects whatsoever. Even when I am spinning with my mouthpiece in whilst doing my ariel acrobatic act. Sigh. I think all that negative crapoleum about the Jeruselum clinic has me not wanting to take anything seriously. Sorry. I'll do better.

Thanks for clearing that up. I'd wondered about that too. And I just noticed that somehow I managed to post the same (similar) thing twice above. Undoubtedly computer error. Heh!

Yup, afraid it's true. The little buggers don't disappear no matter what you do. You might have some luck covering them with self-tanning cream or tan towels. And I have a friend who has an expert do a specially mixed spray tan for her during swim season. It's expensive but she looks fab. And the loose skin is another lovely little issue. I'm finding that my upper arms are probably never going to have nice definition, just stoopid sagging on the underside. It sucks when you stop waving goodbye and your underarms don't!

I think a lot of it depends on how old you are and what kind of shape you're in. And what kind of vacation do you have planned? Will you have someone to help with the kids on vacation? Are you a single parent? Have a good, supportive husband and father for the kids? Needless to say, there are no guarantees that you won't encounter something unusual during or after surgery that might require more help from outside than you originally planned on. But I'll give you feedback on my progress after surgery. I only had a few days of feeling uncomfortable and only a couple of days that I felt like I needed a little pain medication. I bounced back very quickly after the band, not so fast after the sleeve. But I am older than you are and probably wasn't in as good physical condition as you. My left side incision where he removed the portion of my stomach was pretty sore and tender for a couple of weeks. And although I've heard a lot of people say they had no energy, I felt pretty good except for that one tender incision. It is crucial that you get in the required amount of liquids, Protein and Vitamins for a speedy recovery. The better care you take of yourself, the quicker you'll feel like doing your normal activities. And if you try to eat like even a little like you used to, you'll have problems. I hope your doctor has a good plan that is not too rigid with food choices. My dietician had a plan that added new foods every 2 or 3 days and so it kept me from getting bored with my diet during those weeks just after surgery. All in all, if you take good care of yourself, and you have no complications, you should be fine. But you will probably still need to pamper yourself a little and not expect too much from your body. It will have been through a lot with the surgery and anesthesia and it takes a while for anyone to feel 100% after all that. Good luck! Hope all goes well for you.

I apologize... I just noticed that your surgery was in June. Sorry! You might not be eating enough to keep your system happy. They insisted that I have Centrum Chewable Vitamins every day plus a Calcium with Vitamin D with two meals. The Centrum and Calcium cannot be taken at the same time so I take the Centrum in the morning. I drink some Water then chew it up and then a little more water and then Breakfast. It has worked so well. I feel so much better and healthier than I did before the sleeve. I take the chewable calcium with Vitamin D with lunch and dinner. If I miss the Calcium + D, my stomach gets seriously unhappy. I asked the dietician about that and she said that the Calcium + Vitamin D actually help with absorbtion of nurients. I also take a Vitamin B-12 sublingual (under your tongue) once a day which makes me feel great. I also added a L-Lysine tablet once a day, last week because I spent too much time in the sun and got a fever blister (herpes) on my nose. It's cleared that up quite nicely. I used to hardly ever take vitamins and didn't think I needed them. But I get plenty of Protein, take these things I listed and I haven't lost my hair or had any other issues since surgery. I feel better than I have for many, many years. I have followed his orders and it's been great. I haven't had to take those PPI's or acid reducers at all except for a few they gave me in the hospital. A couple of nights I felt a little burn and the doc told me to take a tsp of Mylanta. It worked like a charm and haven't had to take it since. And I used to have acid reflux with the band. So I can't tell you how happy I am and how great this surgery has been for me. I hope you get it resolved soon because I want everyone to enjoy the kind of success that I have.

Doc said no fencing with real swords, no acrobatic acts that include ariel swings, no mix of bison-elk hamburger meat for the first 3 days, only yogurt drinks that don't have kiwi and not to lift my husband for 10 days if he weighs more than the combined weight of our dogs. Oh yeah, and 124.5 ounces of tea, preferably green, per day for 6 weeks. Fortunately I was able to stick to the plan. Well, except for the acrobatics. You just can't keep a good girl down!

Sounds great Brooklean! Keep up the good work. It's been about 3 months since my surgery and I couldn't be happier! I haven't had a stall, although I experienced a minor slow down since the initial period of dropping a lot right after surgery. But my weight loss has been pretty continual, like promised, which is around 2 lbs a week. I now have reached the point where I have lost more than half of what I need to lose to reach my goal of 130. Knowing that I have less to lose than I've already lost is somehow very exciting to me. I've always had this huge amount to lose even after I've lost 30 lbs or so on any diet. I started out with the band at 220 lbs and now I'm in the 150s. I was so afraid I would never weigh less than 170 again which is basically the lowest I got with the band. So I can't tell you how happy I am with this surgical procedure! I only wish I hadn't wasted 3 years fighting with the band!

Perhaps you're taking in too much liquid or solid food at a time and your stomach is overloaded. I mean you don't have to take in much to reach overload. Sometimes only a very small amount makes me know that if I take one more drink I will spit up instantly. Your problem actually sounds more involved than that but it's the only thing I can think of that I have experienced that is similar. Good luck. Hope you get it resolved soon. If you've lost 70 lbs. since April, chances are you definitely should be feeling weak. You need your Vitamins, in chewable form, and you need your Protein - 70 grams a day. Have you been keeping track of your protein intake? Do you have a good source of easy to ingest protein? Like a Protein shake? And you should also drink a little Cranberry juice to aide your kidney function.

I was sleeved on April 28th. Haven't had any symptom you mentioned. I have had the usual female hot flash but nothing centered in my body or feeling like it was somehow interacting with my inner surgical site. Definitely should stick with pressing your doc on this!

God doesn't interfere or cause bad or good things to happen. People need to wise up and take responsibility for their actions and understand that people are fallible, accidents happen and there are good people and bad people in this world. Stop giving God credit for the good stuff and stop blaming the devil for the bad stuff. This entire discussion reminds me of a time when people worshipped the sun god or rain god or whatever god they created in their heads so that they could explain things away that they couldn't deal with. Life is precious, death is inevitable. Everything inbetween is up to us. We might read the good book for guidance on how to be a better person, a better wife or husband, a better parent or friend but it's a guide book, written by fallible people, not the literal word of God. And I know that the more someone who is a close-minded, extremist religious fanatic hears that, it will merely cause them to dig their heels in deeper because they find such comfort in their beliefs. That's fine, whatever works for them... just so long as their beliefs are not forced on me. Because my beliefs are every bit as real and important to me as theirs are to them.

Amen brother!

The Vitamin D deficiency is not to be taken lightly. I take a Calcium + Vit D with two of my meals everyday. It helps with digestion among other things - by that I mean absorbing nutients. Also, I have been taking 75 mg of Wellbutrin post surgery instead of the 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL prior to surgery. And I'm doing great! I also take the Chewable Centrum Vitamins and a B-12 sublingual a day. I am feeling better and am happier than I have been in many, many years. And my weight loss is progressing slowly but surely every day. People are beginning to say that they hardly recognize me if they haven't seen me since before surgery. I also found that I needed L-Lysine supplements because I got a big fever blister near my nose after spending too much time in the sun. I was surprised to learn that L-Lysine also helps metabolize Protein properly. It's not a very well known supplement but when I need it, for a fever blister or herpes breakout on my face, it is the ONLY thing that helps. Good luck. Don't be depressed. Take your meds. We're bound to be low on energy as fast as we're losing weight. Try the sublingual Vitamin B-12.

Sorry about your personal bed wetting problem but very happy that you are such a bright person.

Sorry you're so narrow-minded that you can't understand the difference between "pro-choice" and "pro-abortion" Is there anyone else out there who doesn't understand that one can be anti-abortion AND pro-choice? Anyone who can't understand how someone can rant and rave about abortion being killing, under any circumstance imaginable, and that the reason it is wrong is because God made all things but who finds it perfectly acceptable to rationalize and in fact endorse capitol punishment?

Yay Rodriquez, you're awesome!

Cleo's that was my first thought too. And you hit the nail on the head - personal choice is what this discussion is all about. Think what it would be like if one day our country became so over populated that the government decided that women could only have one child, or even no children.

You're still addressing the three of us patty. I thought you were going to stop? Just have to have the last word? Oooh, I consider that a challenge. A sperm and an egg that have met up are not a baby, no matter how much you insist that it is. It is a fertilized egg. It has a certain percentage of a chance of continued growth. The conditions must be right. And one of those conditions is that the woman/host be willing and able to nurture it to term. It IS life. It IS NOT a person. It is a POTENTIAL person. Otherwise, why wouldn't we be having funerals or at least some kind of rituals, for every spontaneous abortion that happens when nature realizes that it is not a viable pregnancy and automatically sheds the "blob of tissue?"

I'm glad you vented. It's healthy and it is good that you posted your own views and experience. It's what helps us all understand how difficult this topic is for most women and how very personal it is as well. None of us can walk in another woman's shoes. What would be unthinkable for one of us is absolutely a necessity for another. I admire you for the decision you made and the fact that you were able to not allow the rapist to have control over you beyond that heinous act of aggression he perpetrated on you. You must be a very strong and smart lady. Your son is a lucky young man. And since you're intelligent I hope you can understand or at least respect the feelings of any woman who would be unable to cope with continuing an unwanted, unplanned pregnancy where a man forced his sperm into her body without her consent. The life-changing, life-challenging condition that a rape forces on many women, other than you and probably many others who feel as you do, surely could cause their destruction since any sane and normal life would be impossible for them. In other words, many women might rather die than continue such a pregnancy. These are the reasons why the government should not be able to take away women's rights on this issue. We are all so very different. We are all entitled to our own beliefs and the control over our own bodies. Children are far too important to be considered a commodity controlled by the government. Women are as well. Again, I commend you for your very brave and loving decision and I congratulate you for taking control of your body and your life and the life you gave your son! You have an amazing story. If your son ever did hear it I am sure he would only have love and admiration for you.

I'm glad you're done. You make no sense. You are totally against abortion because it is murder. Oh but except in a certain case, then you've decided there's an exception. And as for capitol punishment, you're all for THAT. Holey smokes! That's murder no matter what you want to call it and no matter how many ways you try to justify it. And we're not talking just disposal of a blob of tissue - it's the actual murder, the real killing, of an honest-to-goodness living breathing human being. You're passing judgement on a person based sometimes on circumstancial and/or trumped up evidence and then you're murdering them. What kind of moral code or righteousness allows that? You do not even sound remorseful about your harsh commitment to capitol punishment when someone on death row has been been wrongly convicted and found to be innocent. And your arguments fall flat when you try to defend them. And I've only touched the tip of the proverbial iceberg when it comes to your logic. You quote passages from the Bible when it suits you, when it suits your way of thinking. And then you totally ignore passages that make a case for a viewpoint that is quite the opposite of yours. Or you say that's not what God meant! And then you go on to tell us of some interpretation you've heard that you've decided is correct. And then you announce that you are worthy of presenting the correct interpretation to us on behalf of God. You really have no clue how pompous and arrogant you are. You have convinced yourself that you're speaking for God and therefore correct in every word you say. In fact, you get it wrong most of the time. It will be refreshing to not read your assinine comments on this topic.

You're saying that food is the drug that you used to feel better. I know that feeling. That was true for me as well. However it got to the point where it was harming me so much I had to do something or die. I finally decided that I care about myself. It finally doesn't matter whether anyone else cares about me or not. I care about myself. I want to be healthy and happy and food no longer could do that for me. So I'm giving it up and I have never felt better about anything in my life.