ouroborous

I should note that I'm having a strange problem these days: my shoulders are bigger than my waist! My shoulders are XL bordering on XXL, and my waist is L bordering on M! Which means that unless I buy tailored clothes (which there is no way in *hell* I'm going to buy until I'm at my target weight!) everything will look a little bulky at the waist. But if you look, you can tell that there's nothing at my waist -- nothing below my shoulders -- aside from cloth. Such a strange problem to have. A strange, but good problem!

You look amazing! Congratulations!

So, to all of you success stories out there, here's a question: how did you start thinking about yourself as a "normal person" instead of an "obese person?" Despite nearly losing 100 lbs, I'm still thinking of myself as the "fat blob," instead of the sexay man-hunk (okay, I jest, but still...). So, for you guys who've been through this... how did you do this? Was it just a matter of time? Did you just wake up one day and realize that you no longer saw yourself in the same light? I've seen a few similar topics on here recently, so I think that this is topical.

Wish I could get to where you are, mentally! To me, I'm still the big fat guy that all the girls were "just friends" with!

Honestly? It's not the end of the world to even eat and drink at the same time. I've done it, and... it didn't kill me! That being said, it will likely give you acid reflux. So... avoid it

Seriously, this is one of the best things about weight loss surgery. Guys, don't walk, run to your surgeon. Imagine all the promises they give you on those "Extenze" commercials. Now, imagine that they're REAL. And imagine that they're PERMANENT. It's like permanent, side-effect-free Viagra. Seriously. I'm just going to stop there.

I was sleeved in May of this year. I'm nearly 100 lbs out. Ask me anything I will say this, brothers: it's been a wild ride.

Tiff, that's amazing -- congratulations! And, I had to look up "orthrostatic hypotension" (I knew it had something to do with posture because of the Latin roots, but still!). I believe that I have that as well; when I stand up rapidly, I get very lightheaded, which is characteristic of a hypotonic episode. Good to hear that it's resolved (or, at least, resolving) for you!

You look amazing!

I'm waiting for the 100 lbs mark myself.

Well, the NSV's are fast and furious, but scale victories are nice too. I'd been in a long stall, and I'm starting to believe it was because I was eating these stupid popsicles at 80 calories a pop. I've cut them out and the weight has gone back to a nice steady pound or so per week. More importantly, I'm finally under 250 pounds! This is a big deal for a guy who's been over 300 lbs for at least 15 years. I haven't been under 250 lbs since high school. 250 lbs is also an important number for me for two reasons: it marks 80 lbs lost (yay!) and there are a LOT of activities that I always wanted to do "some day" (skydiving...) that have an "absolute weight limit" of 250 lbs. So now I can finally get back to trying all those "I'd like to try them some day" activities that I've always been too fat to try! I'm excited On a side note, I went to my girlfriend's Xmas party last week, and her boss, who hasn't seen me for a year, couldn't stop talking about how great I looked. And he wasn't the only one. It's weird, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I'm not the same giant blimp of a man that I used to be!

I figure that probably around spring of next year I might start posting some body shots. By that time I should be approaching my goal weight, and it won't be a horrendous waste of money to buy clothes that fit properly. Plus, I maybe will be a little less shy about people seeing "all of me." Now if I could just turn back the clock so that I was 30 instead of 40, life would be good

Weird thought... I wonder if other heavy folks (and previously-heavy folks, like us!) have noticed that they have a hard time allowing pictures of anything other than their face. I've noticed that even though my body doesn't look so bad these days, I'm still very shy about allowing anyone to take pictures of anything besides my face. It's just a learned behavior, but I just realized that I've noticed a lot of other folks on here only ever have face pics!

Doing well! Now that all the post-surgery stuff is over and I'm just doing the slow-'n-steady weight loss, there hasn't been as much to keep me posting here all the time, but I like to update folks on my progress now and again. I figure it's a tiny way of "paying back" all of the support and advice I got from around here. And frankly I'm gettin' to feelin' so sexay that I just HAVE to get my brag on now and again

Yes, it's definitely great to be below the 250 lb threshold for a lot of reasons, but the limitations thing is a biggy. The main reason I got this surgery was to remove impediments from my life -- all of the diseases that were chasing me as I segue into middle age being morbidly obese, all of the things I can't do because I'm so huge -- gone! With one flick of the surgeon's scalpel! I'm hoping to say goodbye to the 240's by early next year. I have a Hawaii vacation scheduled for late February, which is about.... mm 10 weeks away? So if I can maintain 1 lb per week loss, I should be able to JUST barely sneak into the 230's by then! At that point, I'll be less than 20 lbs from my goal weight! Huzzah! Congratulations on your progress

So I've been eating lots of popsicles lately -- they felt like "free" post-op food that was really easy to get down, and a nice "treat" when I wanted something sweet and not necessarily "sensible." Problem is that the brand we'd switched to was 80 calories per popsicle, and I'd eaten as many as 4-5 in a day! I did the math and realized that that could be 1/2 or more of my day's allotted calories. I think I got in the habit with the other brand -- which was sugar-free, and had about 5 calories per popsicle. So I guess it's common sense, but still -- check the calories on the things you're eating. Things you think might be "free" may not be so free after all... My weight is still dropping, but I've been in a stall lately. I'm going to see if cutting out the popsicles or switching back to the sugar-free brand will help!

I figured I'd add this in for anyone following the thread. Since I posted, I've made dramatic improvements in mood. I no longer really suffer any blues or anxiety; it really seemed to be more of a post-surgery thing, or due to poor nutrition/sleep. I am careful to take plenty of Omega 3's and Vitamin D -- my last blood test showed that all of my levels are good. More importantly, I take great pains to make sure I get enough exercise and sleep. What I've discovered is that if I eat right, drink enough Water, exercise enough, and sleep regularly, I don't get depressed or anxious. Period. I got the Wellbutrin prescription, but never used it -- it's sitting in the cupboard. My experience is unique to me, of course -- for anyone else, talk to your doctor and make your own choices. But for me, I'm glad to be able to keep a level, positive mood the "old-fashioned way." In short: eat well, exercise, and mind your sleep. If your depression STILL hangs around after that, and you're more than -- say -- six months out from surgery, talk to your doctor.

At 6 months out, I've hit my first major stall; this one has lasted about 4 weeks now. I'm just doing what I advise everyone to do: keep doing what you're supposed to be doing anyway, and don't pay too much attention to the scale.

Distract yourself. Realistically, you're more likely in far more danger just driving to work every day than you are from this surgery, if the surgery is done by a reputable doctor in good facilities, etc. In fact, your risks from remaining obese are far greater than the risks from the surgery. I know that none of this rational stuff touches fear (which is, by definition, irrational), so my best advice is simply to distract yourself. Don't think about it. You know the fear is irrational. You know you can't "will" the fear away (willpower is SO overrated). So just find something else to do to make the time pass -- read a book, watch a movie, try to get in some exercise. Before you know it, the surgery will be over, you'll be doing fine, and well on the way to recovery. BTW, your stats for height/weight/BMI almost exactly match mine, and my surgery was flawless -- very, very little pain, no complications, amazingly short recovery. I was on my feet and mobile within hours of the surgery, and within a week I had almost forgotten I had it -- aside from the weight dropping off like crazy!

First of all, you claim that you're some sort of miserable, abject failure at losing weight, but unless my math is faulty, you've lost 62 pounds. It does come off very fast at first, but then slows down dramatically. Second, not everyone drops weight equally fast -- men have an easier time of it than women (maybe makes up for us dying ten years younger!). So I would definitely consider whether your "I'm a failure" at weight loss really is "I'm not losing weight as fast as I want to." Second, I really recommend against tying value judgments to weight loss. Despite our media culture, weight loss and obesity are more of a medical issue than a willpower/self worth issue. It's hard to tune out the persistent messages that people who are obese are failures, but the truth is that obesity should be considered like hepatitis or HIV -- sure, you may have played a role in GETTING the disease (and even then, maybe not), but once it happens to you, it's pretty much out of your hands without medical intervention. Just like someone with HIV or hepatitis can live well and take their meds to help reduce the consequences of the disease, we can eat right and exercise to try to make our obesity disease more manageable. But similar to the fact that you can't use "willpower" to conquer hepatitis, you can't ultimately use "willpower" to conquer obesity. So why blame yourself for something that's ultimately out of your hands? Definitely consider psychotherapy. Given your consistent casting of life events in the most negative light, I would recommend CBT -- cognitive behavioral therapy -- which will help you learn to recognize and alter damaging self-talk. Ultimately calling yourself things like a loser or a failure will do nothing positive -- it won't, contrary to popular belief, motivate you to "try harder," and it might well just make you less willing to try to improve the things you CAN change. So, learning how to treat yourself more kindly will help you sail through life's inevitable obstacles more easily. In the end, I recommend just focusing on what you SHOULD be doing -- meet goals of Water and Protein and Vitamin intake, make sure you are taking any prescriptions, get as much exercise as you can safely get -- and then leave the rest in your doctor's hands. Above all, DON'T keep comparing your weight loss to others, and to what you think you "should" be losing. Weight Watchers and other groups have a saying that you should take to heart: "compare, and despair" -- in other words, the only rate of loss that matters is YOUR rate, and you should focus on the fact that you ARE still losing weight. In short, aside from some medical complications, when I take out your negative self-talk, I see a lap-sleeve success story, not a failure. Isn't it interesting how differently two people can see the same event?

So I figured I'd post a (hopefully) short note on what my life is like about 5 months after my lap sleeve, for any prospective sleevers. First, the bad news -- this is forever, and it's not a decision to be made lightly. This WILL affect the food choices you make for the rest of your life. It's probably the safest WLS surgery around (when you total up operative and perioperative risks, long-term success rates, M&M stats, and so on), but that doesn't mean it's risk- or hassle-free. Now, let me soften the blow: it's really, really easy. Every day, I take some Multivitamins -- and I was taking Vitamins before the surgery, so this is no biggy. Every day, I drink a Protein shake for Breakfast -- not because I have to, but because they're tasty and it's quick (I'm usually in a rush in the mornings) and that way I know I'm not getting protein deficient. I have changed my eating habits dramatically -- I've slowed down my eating and drinking, and I don't eat breads any more for the most part, because I find that bread gets "stuck." It seemed like an imposition at first, but now I don't notice because I've sort of been trained. I don't even WANT bready stuff any more, and that's a HUGE change from my pre-op mentality (I was a HUGE fan of doughy, bready stuff). I exercise, but I haven't been to a gym since my surgery, and I'm not sure I'm going to be. What I've discovered is that my activity level (or lack thereof) has NOTHING to do with my weight loss. Now, don't get me wrong -- I still do a fair amount of exercise, but that's because 1) it helps in so many OTHER ways -- I sleep better, I think better, my sex drive is better, and my occasional spells of anxiety or mild blues are pretty much gone when I'm exercising, and 2) now that I'm 70+ pounds lighter, exercise seems so EASY. I can easily run up three flights of stairs without getting winded! At 330 lbs, that would have (possibly literally) killed me! So, when exercise makes me feel so good and doesn't HURT like it used to -- why WOULDN'T I exercise? But again, my exercise "routine" consists of some push ups in the morning to keep my chest and shoulders from getting flabby, some arm curls while I'm sitting reading the news in the morning to keep my arms strong, and a 30-45 minute fitness walk at lunch every day. Honestly, it doesn't feel like I'm having to "work out" at all -- it's all so EASY -- and yet my stamina keeps going up, my arms and chest are getting very muscular. It almost feels like I'm "cheating" since there's so little work involved, but I wanted to show you that this is not like you're used to! You don't have to sweat for hours and hours in a stinky gym just to "maintain" -- post sleeve, you just have to do enough to be healthy, and honestly your body WILL reward you. I still eat sweets -- just not very much. I still drink an occasional bottle of beer or (more likely) a mixed drink or two -- just not very much (volume or frequency). I still have days or whole weekends where I just lie around on the couch and do NOTHING at all -- no fitness walk, nothing -- and mostly munch on snack-y foods. It's not like I'm some slave to my sleeve. And the net result of my hard, hard life? I've lost over 70 pounds with little to no effort. My weight loss shows no signs of slowing. My doctor is amazed how healthy I am at 40 -- my last blood test showed that ALL of my numbers were "within range." My sex drive -- which vanished in my 20's-30's when I was so fat -- has returned with a vengeance. My face looks much more lean and angular. My bones and muscles now show where fat used to bulge and roll out. I can easily walk over 5 miles without getting winded or sore, and could probably walk 10 miles or more -- in the right clothes and shoes, I think I could walk for days. I don't get tired. I'm already out of the "morbidly obese" category; I'm looking to be out of the "obese" category near the beginning of next year, and by the middle to end of next year -- if my weight loss progress holds steady at about 1-2 pounds per week on average -- I should be near or under 200 pounds. I started this at 330, and I haven't been under 250 in my adult life. And all of this without any real deprivation, any really hard work (aside from meticulously following the doctor's orders), and any real cost aside from the up-front cost for the surgery. So, I don't want to make you think this surgery is completely cost and risk free. Like everything in life -- especially everything worth having -- it has trade-offs and consequences. But as someone who has literally struggled with his weight his entire life -- 30 years, probably, and I'm only 40! -- I can tell you that this is the best medical decision I've ever made. I would do it again in a heartbeat. In fact, my only real regret is that I didn't get a chance to do this when I was, say, 20, instead of 40. But still, I'm so very glad I made this choice. Hopefully that will help some folks who are on the fence realize just how "normal" life after sleeve is.

Thanks for all the kind words! My weight loss is continuing at the leisurely (but healthy) pace of about 1 lb per week. It's gotten to the point where it plateaus and the week-to-week "noise" of Water weight and so forth can "hide" the weekly progress, so I have one more piece of advice for you prospective or new sleevers: once you get more than 3-4 months out from your surgery, weigh yourself monthly at most. Weekly weigh-ins will just drive you crazy because of the numbers "bouncing around," but monthly weigh-ins will still show steady progress -- and that's what counts. At this rate, I'm on track to be under 250 by the end of the year -- merry Christmas, me! -- and at my original target weight -- 220 -- by my next birthday. Wonderful presents, both. It'll probably be next fall before I'm under 200, but I'm okay with that; at least I'm on the road! And still, my life continues to be easy; unlike before, I don't have to constantly make decisions centered around my weight and losing weight. PS: greek yogurt and Protein shakes are AWESOME choices for a sleever. I'm a big fan, myself!