BandMeHardAndFast

hi...im carlene and im new here. i want to get a band put down in me. ive seen the advertmests on the bus benches near my place and its supposed to be easy to loose weight with it but i dont know. im fat but i dont want to really excercise. do i have to if i get a lap?? does it do the weight losing...how does it do it? the bus benches dont say very much. can anyone tell me were too start. do i call the numbers on the bus benches? are they good places? its nice to be here-ive been watchinh this place a while. carlene

Hi everyone! OMG!! Wow what a busy weekend I am so excited about this and everything im learning!! But I got so many more questions. LOL!! Ok im thinking about this Mexican surgery coz its cheap and I don’t have insurance but there some things im wondering about. Ok… so I know you can go to mexico and get the surgery but im not sure about going to mexico because, like, well there are just….you know….so many…..well, Mexicans down there. I mean like they are just everywhere. I mean most of the people down there in mexico are like Mexicans which is kind of like it is here in California but down there they are more Mexican than they are up here but not too much more. I mean they are just everywhere down there doing Mexican stuff and everything and its not like I don’t like Mexicans or anything. OMG, I LOVE Mexican food I think that’s why im fat lololol!! My and my smarter brother chris go up to West Hollywood to this really kewl Mexican restaurant called el coyote but it’s the homo part of town so I don’t know why we go there except chris says he likes the food. It’s a weird place and Chris went to the bathroom there once and and came back and said that he went into one of the stalls and there was a big hole in the wall between the stalls and he thought that was really weird and then we had margaritas and he went to the bathroom and he was gone for about an hour I guess he drank too much lol!!! Anyway he ate lots of beans and he was lighting his farts all the way back home. Like I said before chris is the smart one in our family hes in adult school now and hes going to get his ged in a couple of years. We are like so lucky to live in California where they have really good schools and they make it so that you finish high school in like only 6 or 7 years. So anyway sorry to get off track but I want to know people here and I want people to know me hehehe! So heres what im thinking. Im thinking that if there are Mexican doctors that do this suregy in mexico then im thinking that because the mexicans are all coming up here that I can just go down to Home Depot and find a Mexican surgeon standing out there right? Coz that’s how they get there work so im thinking that I can just pick one up at home depot. But my smarter brother chris made a really good point about where to get the surgery done after I get the Mexican surgeon at home depot. Coz like years ago when I had my first abortion when I was 14 and had it done by a guy that worked out of his chevy van down by the Hermosa beach pier and he charged like only 20 bucks (plus state tax, the city tax, and the county tax, and the state recycling fee) so it came out to like 63 bucks. But what happened was after he did it I figured I was right by the beach there and I decided to go for a swim in the salt water and it stung like a sunavabitch so I don’t want that to happen again. So im thinking that because my doctor is Mexican that we should be able to go to like any hospital in the area because I think my surgeon is only gonna speak Spanish and here in California if you only speak Spanish you can like go into any hospital and get whatever you want and don’t have to pay for anything so im thinking that we could get an operating room for my Mexican surgeon and get the lap band put in for free and come out with a handful of foods stamps too, so im thinking this is a really good plan. And I could use the foods stamps to buy the Power Bait. So, like I’m thinking this might the way to go. So can anything think of anything wrong with my plan? OMG I’m getting so exicted thinking about this! thanks, carlene

OMG!!! I used a OPRAH word!!!!!! LOLOLOLOLOL!!!! that is so coool! god i love oprah! heywe should have a special place here to talk about all the neat thing she says...OMG! woulnt that be kewl???? oh and gayle king. i LOVE gayle king. i mean there are people that say she wouldd be cleaning toilets at a hoilday inn if she wasnt oprahs best friend but i dont think so she is SOOOO talented. i dont think there is anyone in the world that deseves her success more than gayle king. except for mark consuelos. thanks! carlene

OMG. Wow. You think maybe??? But I dunno. I dunno about just having sex with a democrat could make me fat. I know that democrats want to give away free food and everything so that people will get way fatter and they’ll get fatter and that’s the reason there making this new health plan because people are getting fatter because of all the free foood they give and theyll all need lasp bands. But as far as having sex making me fatter….i dunno….but I usually like having sex with republicans coz they always give me some money and ask me to keep quiet coz there wives get upset and the churches where they preach and do god stuff and everything get upset so they want me to not say anything so they give me some cash. But democrats never give me any money coz they always say that is better if they don’t because we should all share with each other and everything should belong to everybody including my va-jay-jay. I was with a state senator once some guy named nunez and he started singing kumbaya when he came and it was really special coz he wanted to be close to me but he left real fast. But the republicans always use condoms coz they don’t wanna catch anything from me but the democrats never use a condom. The democrats always say that they are doing it for me coz if I get pregnant itll allow me to exercise my rights and self-actualize as a woman or some crap like that and do my own choices on my own body, so theyre doing it to help me be a woman, which is cool im glad they are so nice to be able to help me be a woman more. OMG. Wow. I cant believe I said all that! Hehehehe lol! Im making so many new friends here! Thanks! Carlene

Sexal Reasssinment surgery??? Ok, like now Im soooo confused!!!!! You mean they have to do surgery to make it so you can have sex with someone else other than who you are havng sex with now???? OMG!! I didn’t know it was that hard! Ive been having sex with other persons without having the surgey that makes it so I can! Do you think that’s why im fat? Coz I didn’t have the sex surgery that makes it so I can have sex with other guys? I mean im ok with who im having sex with this weekend. Hes real cool. Except that hes a democrat. But that’s ok we don’t talk when we have sex and I don’t have to listen.. OMG I have so much to learn! Im so glad I found this place!! Thanks! carlene

ok, so i was reading what someone wrote about the 5 day pouch test and now im confused. why would you have to test your pouch? dont they do that at the pouch factory before they send them? and why 5 days? youd think that if you just dropped a couple jars of PB in the pouch its gonna break or not you wouldn't have to wait like 5 days? thats weird but i don t know i have so much to lern. Thanks! carlene

wow! hi everyone! im cant beleiev all the nice responses to my questions. im so glad i found this place. some things i dont understand though this stuff about headhunter or hh and that stuff. i guess ill find out though as i become more a part here. you guys have so much fun lollollol! i just got home form work and my head is all full of stuff. more questions about the band. i looked around the sight and the more i look the more i have questions. lots of words i dont get and what things mean. ok so ill start. this thing called PB. I see that sround here a lot . now i think i figured that one out coz i asked my brother chris. hes the real smart one in my family .hes in adult school now and hes getting his ged. but whenever i have questions i ask him he almost always knows stuff. ok so i asked him about the PB thing and he said that was easy. he goes fishing a lot and he says that PB stands for PowerBait which is what he uses to catch a lot of trouts at diamond valley lake and corona lake. so im thinking that this must be what people with the band eat when they have the band. i guess it must be ok coz the fish eat it and it doesn't seem to hurt them but how do we know coz they die when we catch them anyway right? lol!! hehehe! so my brother chris took me out in the garage where he lives and he pulled out a box of the PowerBait (oops...i mean the PB...im one of you now right???lol!) he had a hole bunch of jars of it and he said i could have whatever i want. It comes in all sorts of colors but he tells me that its all one flavor (but I guess you all knew that right??? Lol…..) so I scooped some out of a jar (I got the kind that reminded me of popsicle with different colors.) and I put it on a cracker and I ait it. Now I don’t know if your supposed to put it on cracker is that allowed? Anyway I tried it and its not all that bad. Its kind of salty and feels like playdoh but that’s ok cause I like salty stuff in my mouth. Ok, so that’s the deal with the PB, I think I got that down ok but how much are you supposed to eat? I didn’t see any nutritional info on the label so I don’t know…how do you guys eat it? Do you mix it with anything? Oh and now I get the pouch thing because PB comes in these little round bottles so I know what the pouch is for now, to carry around the little bottles. Ok. So im learning more about this and im getting really excited. Ill have more questions later……I need to find out about all of this coz I think I want to do this. My dad asked me to ask you guys how much this costs and if they take a check? Thanks! Carlene

ok ill take a pic tomorrow and put it up...its cool.. i got to go to bed.but ill be here tomorrow after my cows.. wow this is great too many cool people im learning...im going to be a bander i hope soeday!!!!!!! thanks! carlene

oh and socalchic i know where downey is not to far from me. thats where karen carpenter died. she hit the floor and just died. she was gone when she hit the tiles. she didnt need aband coz she stuck her fingers down her food pipe and barfed. my older brother andy used to go sit in front of her house hoping to see her. but he never did. he went to her grave though. hey thansk....this is really good and thanks for the link to the band site..... carlene

lol!! heheheh! thats funny! that did happen to me! lol! but it was not very long ago one of my cows did get all piss and rammd me in the head with her head...it really hurt ig got knocked out for few minuites and then i had some stiches from the vet. i stll have a scar. oh and are there scars from the surgery? i don't mind coz i have a big tattoo that might cover it depends on where it is. and i have a scar from my cesaren section i had a long time ago, so i guess it doesnt matter. but i just wonder a bunch. ok if this band blocks food from going down how do i eat? im confused. i know i cant eat the sliding foods but whats left. whats not sliding food? how about clam chowder? i really like chowder. Carlene

yeh the reeses are abig problem for me. and my brother. his name is chris and he's fat too. he's really fatter than I am, and he said that if i get a band and it works he wants one too. he aksed if when i'm done with mine maybe he could use mine? i dont know if it it works like that. But he can if he wants. Can you wash a band? He might have to if he uses mine. So what does one of these bands look like? ok so it goes inside. i didnt know that - they dont say that on the bus benches or the tv but thats ok. so its the kind of surgery where they cut you open? or is like those pills where they can you know just put it up your butt. i know i sound dumb, but i really dont know. ok the RNY again...that would help with the reeses? i would dump when i ate sugar? you mean the sugar in the reeses would make me take a dump? Well I already have to go potty when I eat a lot of them, so I don’t know why that’s different. But I’ll have to look into the rny. The reeses are what I think made me fat. Ive been looking a round here and I see people calling this a journey. So I guess that means the journey to the doctor? That makes me think that maybe there aren’t very many doctors that do this if I have to take a journey to get it done. I guess that mean Mexico? I live near los Angeles, and there are bunches of doctors here. But I work out in a place called riverside county where there are farms coz I work with cows. There might be doctors out there that do this. I don’t know. Boy there is a lot to learn.lol! Ok thanks I have so much to learn! But I think I know more now than I did before! Lol! Thanks! Carlene

hi, thanks thepoolgirl! thats a cute name to. i guess you like to play pool? my brother has a pool table in his garage. its fun to wtahc him but i dont play. i guess im not good at banging balls on a table. lol! hehehe....... ok RNY. i saw that here to. but thats another thing i dont know about. i thought it was a rap singer or sumthin. i guess not. so is that different from the band? a different kind of band? if I get that can i still eat reeses or are the rules the same? theres another thing i dont know to much about, my brother said the band was osmething that goes outside, and kind of wraps around you tight to keep you from eating to much. if thats what it is why does it need a surgery? dont surgery things always go on the inside? or does part of it go inside and part of it outside? oh and someone mentioned the insurance thing...i dont have insurance but my dad said he would pay for it. this might be another really ass question but if it goes on the outside is this something a vet can do? in my job a meet i lot of vets coz i work with cows, and they can sometimes help me when i cut myself, i have several stitches i got from a vet in my forehead when a cow i was working on got all pissy and ramed my forehead. so i just dont know enough about this thing. i just know that im fat and i need to get rid of it. ok about the mexican thing....are they safe? i mean when we go down there were not supposed to drink the Water and i think maybe they use water in the docotrs offcie there so it cant be all that clean. I dont know. how long do the bands last? do you always have to have them, or can you take them off if you go to the beach? thanks again everyone for all the answers. thsi is so new to me...i hope i can learn so much and give these same answers to other people when they get there bands too! thanks! carlene

oh hey! I leand to use this quote button...wow thats neat.. ok i feel kind of stupid now coz i dont know all these words yet....i know sliders now. i guess thats like ice cream and stuff. but what about cake. its not creamy and slidy can i still have it? but i guess if you mix it with ice cream in your mouth with spit and everything i guess it would be a slider? sorry i guess that was gross. hehehe! ok, now theres the pouch you said. I really feel dumb now...whats the pouch? is that what you carry around your lap band food in ? thanks everyone....i'm really surpised im getting so many answers. there is a bunch to leanri guess, yeh? hehe..lol! carlene

hi restless monkey! wow that is a funny name! i like it. i like monkeys. i dont know if id like one that was resltess though!!! heheh do you like have a monkey for pet oe something? I really like animals. i work with tme for my job. i work with cows. what is srs surgery? is that something you have to do before you get your band? i havent seen that before. I hope not. i don't really want to do anything but get that band put down inside me to stop food. excpet for my reeses! lol hehehe! just kidding!! lol! thanks! carlene

h1 soocalchic! wow its sure nice to have people to meet so fast. i get kind of nervos on boards like this... yeh reeses cups are a problem with me kinda...i eat them a lot. its weird what i like to do is take a jar of regular peanut buttur and dip the reese cups in that and eat them...yeh i know its gross but it is real good. once i got kind of nuts and i melted some hersheys bars and dipped the reeses in the Peanut Butter and then in the melted hersheys. it was so yummyy...yeh hehehe. o but yeh i know thats why i got fat i guess! loll! ok whats a slider food? i've seen that here before and i dont know what that means. where does it slide? like over the band or something? is that a good thing? thanks!

oh and ive heard about people getting it Mexico.....do they do that ther? is it cheaper? are they better? thanks! carlene