BethMoir

Ever since i was a child, i had been skinny. My sister tended to be the one to over eat and was constantly teased. She lost that weight as she hit puberty and i was the one to gain thwe wait through chronic depression and overeating. Understanding i was the one who had total control over my eating habits, i found how much i loved choclated. Over the years i put more and more weight on not really nociting. When i was 13 i was about 70 kilos, now being 70 i'm just over the 100 kilo mark. After fad diets, milkshake diets. excersising, gym, everything i tried, it never worked. The fact im a fusy eater doesn't help much either. One day my mother was reading the newpaper and asked me what i thought about lap banding, i told her;" i have no idea, it's epensive isnt it". She suggested we go for an appointment and see about it. Really, what my mother wanted for me is to be thin and healthy before im 18, she also believes that by losing weight, it will change my lifestyle dramatically and help me overcome my depression. So, on the 31st July 2009 i received my Lap banding procedure from a Dr. Dolan at Glenarry in Warwick, Perth. I work at McDonalds, let me tell you just how hard it is working around hot chips and choclate. i work in the cafe and im constantly making people choclate drinks and i say to myself, oh just one sip, just one. But. Im learnign better self control. besides if i need to be operated on again, my mother said it wont be to fix it if it moves or slips, it will be removed. So i have to be extra careful. The pain is hard to deal with, my gernia was also removed. I was given Bruofen and some morphine based syrup to help with pain aswell and some very strong panadol.I was in the same room and 3 other women recieving the procedure and one took our emails so we could touch base ever few months. I just hope, that, after all the work and money, this will pull through. I want to feel healthy, confident, and beautiful. I have never felt beautiful, and until i see no heinous stretch marks on my tummy and i look my age, and feel my age and feel healthy, i will not be content with who i am. I do not feel i am supposed to be oveer weight. I was always tiny and im very tiny boned. And i also hope it will help in my pursue of love, cause really, what teenage boy likes a fat girl? I have only ever had three boyfriends in my life and none of those ever been even remotely serious. I am a person who thrives on affection and without love i know i will be depressed until i do.