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Welcome! You had your surgery on my birthday!! Cheri

sorry push reply twice Cheri

Tell him he will enjoy sex more because you will be feeling great about yourself and you might want more of it, he will jump on board! Also included him in some support group meetings, take him to a seminar. Give him the project of finding some exercises the two of you can do together or which gym you should join together or let him choose a treadmill or something for you. Ask him to be your coach and then let him, so he feels a part of everything. Ask your Surgeon's office if they have a husband and wife willing to talk about how it affected their marriage I bet they will. Buy some books about the surgery that deals with that issue look on amazon.com I have bought many book from them the have a lot of them. Cheri

Amazon.com has many many books about the surgery and life after. Cheri

Hey Deb, I would tell you do it now and by the time your husband retires you will be feeling good and ready for a great life. I am 52 as of last friday and I had Lapband Surgery in July 2009 and it was the best thing I have ever done. Wished I had done it 20 years ago. The first month after surgery is the hardest part while you are healing you will be hungry but it is only a month. If you like Water than you can even double your water and maybe not be so hungry. But it is well worth it. The surgery is easy recovery time not too bad I would think easier than recovery from a heart attack. I went from 251 to 169 and holding would like to lose 15 to 20 lbs more. Go to some support group meetings and meet people in person who have had the surgery. Also research on the web, books, but people at support group meetings are the best as you hear everything the good and the bad. I have not had any real problems, but people can. So research but I would not wait a year if you and your Dr's think it is right for you. I would be happy to answer any questions you have and there are great people on here that can share their experiences with you. Cheri

Glad you were able to come to a decision that you are comfortable with. I think you are making a good decision! I will be praying for you on Monday, keep us updated Best wishes on your new start! Cheri

I am 2+ years out and went in today for a very small unfill just .2cc and it is like the difference of night and day. If you are too tight go back and see your Dr. Most do not charge for unfills. Best wishes! Cheri

Don't be depressed that is 26 lbs hopefully you will never see again. I ordered some books from amazon about the Lapband (they did not cost very much) There are many that start at the beginning and you do not need to know the process of the surgery but if you will research them a little there are ones about living with the band for life. You might check your library too. But you can find out so much by researching right here. I never not once saw a nutrionist and I did lose 84 lbs. There could be reasons why you are not losing, Like the poster before me said give people some details and then they can begin to give you advice Smile and Believe you will do this. Cheri

You know I do not think we mean to say things to hurt peoples' feelings. You just do not know the tone of the written word, was in wriiten in anger or trying to make a point that I have been there so here is my experience. People who are new either know everything or are feeling so lost and need to know everything. As someone who is more than 2 years post opt I STILL come here for support and advice. There are a few really nice people who have been banded more than 2 years and they have great advice and can point you in the right direction if you need help. There are a lot of people here and we all are different. I agree we should all be nice. I have had to say sorry a few times myself and it did not kill me. But I think our longeterm Bandsters deserve more respect than what they are given. And I am not talking about me I am still learning. Cheri

Very proud of you! You have great willpower! Keep it up and keep telling us . . . it encourages us that we are not alone in our battle Cheri

If you just want an opinion I would choose the AP LapBand, The few friends that I have that have the Realize Band were given a 14cc Band and it takes them forever to get it filled to a point that helps them lose weight. Myself and my other friends have 10cc Allergan lap band and have seen to do better. That is totally just my thoughts not backed up by anything but what I have seen. Do the research, but here is my two cents.

If you can't eat you will not lose. It is so horrible to be too tight and not worth the way you feel. I am too tight right now, but only because I can get Water and protien shakes down I am waiting till Tuesday for a small unfill not first time to be too tight. I can not eat a thing and refuse to turn to ice cream I was fine first two week and then it hit me. You might even get tighter without a fill. I am 2+ years out and you will pay almost anything if you are too tight so you might ending up spending more that the $50 if you have to go back in a couple of days or a couple of weeks for an unfill. Cheri

The thing is if you start out cheating you could really hurt yourself or risk your band I was self pay and I followed my Dr. completely. Movin up before time to different stages could hurt you or your Band. Come on we all have a least a little bit of willpower, We are suppose to support people not encourage them to cheat Cheri

Gonna go in there just like before and say 02 or .03 and no more and if he does not agree if I will go elsewhere. I just need a tiny bit out to breath and that is all. I have been too tight before and it only took a tiny bit to make it managable. That is what I want this time too. Trust me I have been good as gold as I am just too tight. This is my second time to see this DR but I think he will listen to my request. i will let you know Tuesday night about his ways. Remember my Surgeon retired. I can get my Water and Protein shakes in but not much more but I am gurgling so much, CHERI

So sorry for all you are going through. You can be strong and get through this just believe in yourself sometimes that is all we can do. I have not been through a divorce and am in a happy marriage of 31 years but I know about stress and depression not because of my marriage but just because of life. We are stronger than we think we are and you have a child look and him/her and find your strenght. I will add you to my prayer list and pray that God will comfort you and show the path He has for you. He loves you and thinks you are great and has great thing for you just expect them. Nobody should ever be treated liked that. Fight for yourself and don't let the stress get to you Cheri

I would trade places with you right now. I am so tight only protien shakes and liquids go down also gurgling salvia day and night. My Surgeon retired and have new Dr and won't take me in for slight unfill untill Tuesday. I can not wait till Tusday!!! I have been too tight before but never this tight. Can not wait for an unfill. As long as I can drink my Water, coffee and protien shakes I can make it to Tuesday but I am getting a little gripy. Today is my birthday I already told them do not being a cake anywhere around me or the smell of food. I am spending my birthday helping my best friend also banded with 14, 11 year old girls at a sleep over, Wish me luck! gurgle gurgle! Cheri

Try another medicine Wellbutrin is suppose to help, also you will drop a couple of lbs when you start taking it. I take it for depression but it also works for quiting smoking. Just do it cold turkey my husband did 25 years ago and never touched another one. I am always on my son all the time to quit but he likes it. I told him your dad gave it up so you would not be around it growing up and now he smokes? Cheri

I lost 84lbs with the most fill being 3.8 cc in a 10 cc band. Also I do not want to started something but people do throw-up from spitting up to full out empting of the pouch. My surgeon knew about it and we never figured out for sure what was causing it, many things can. I do not think it is healthy to throw-up up it happens what can we say, we would rather not. Cheri

I could not believe how long people wait to see their Surgeon I was really surprised. My surgeon was great he gave you his cell phone number would met you on a Saturday if something was wrong and you felt like you needed to be seen. Appointments could be made on the same day or the next, and you saw him not a nurse. Well Dr Spivak retired and moved home to take care of his parents overseas and took a position at the hospital there. I loved him! He turn his people over to TLC in Houston. I decided to go in for a fill as I had not had one in over a year. Choose Dr Terry S. he was very nice and so was his staff. I did have to wait 2 weeks no big deal. Okay that was a month ago got ½c called today and first 2 weeks everything was fine then wow it all changed. So very tight I have been tight before so thought I might wait and see if it settles down but no such luck. last time had just .2ccs out so much difference. Call today told her I was in about 3 weeks ago and had a small fill but was too tight and wanted a slight unfill. Sure no problem we can see you the first week in December. What??? You mean this week 1st week of November right. No they are double booked for the month of November because of Dr. Spivaks people they took over. I told her you don't understand I am too tight getting close to not even protien shakes going down unless thinned down. She could care less. I am self pay and I am not going to the ER and spending all that money as long as I can get protien shakes and my Water down, also my meds down. I have been too tight before for about 3 months and said I would never do it again. But guess I am until the first week of December. Dr. will hear about it when I do seem him Cheri

Sugar is not my problem it is salty stuff like popcorn, My favorite - chips and salsa at the mexican food places. I tell them not to bring them when my banded friends and I go. But doesn't work when my husband goes. He must have them. One of our favorite places will bake them for you instead of giving you fried ones but it just takes one and forget the meal. Cheri Sanction have a great vacation!

That is great! I was self pay too so much easier. Best wishes! Cheri

Please note: I was not the one giving out the cards I heard about it, I would never do that, but would talk with anyone who asked about me. But I would never give out WLS cards to anyone unless they asked me. My Grandaughter tells everybody I have a LapBand people in stores, Mcdonalds and anywhere else we are together she is 5 so there is talk about it in public too much!! But . . have and still do give out tracts about savation and Jesus but I do not shove it down their throats so I could be considered a 'religious' folk. But thats okay. For some reason it does not seem the same Cheri

I agree I do not like any attention. Cheri

So sorry to hear that, maybe time for a meds dosage change? I did have to change to a totally different med as my smaller body could not handle the dosage and I just wanted to sleep all day and I can not do that as I have to work and I pick up my Grandkids from school and keep them a couple of hours on the weekdays and then when they go home, back to work for a few hours. But I would love to get in my bed and never get out. Also maybe seeing a new counselor who can help you see how great you look, working on your body image. Depression is so horrible, so you will be in my prayers. One reason for getting the band is that being overweight and having depression was too much for me to handle, and no matter what I did, I can not change it but the weight I could lose with some help. How does your wife handle it? I feel so sorry for my husband as he wants to help but nothing he can do, I hope soon you can find more happiness and see yourself as others who do not even know you do. You look very handsome and it may take time but one day you will see it too. If people did not think you looked good they would just read and move on without any reply. I have been married 31 years but only dealing with depressions about 7 years. So much shame comes with depression. But remember it takes the mind a while to catch up with the body sometimes. Maybe pack your wife up and go on a vacation just the two of you! Best wishes! Cheri I

Always worked for me but I never can keep it up for very long. For some reason it feels too much like a diet to me, but it does work after about 4 days into it and as long as you do not cheat with any sweets or high carb food. Cheri