mnb

best thing i have ever done in my life!!!so this is gonna be the beginning of what cold be thebest thing you have ever done in your life

im still a slob too. i wish i had that substitute addiction. But i beleive My sub-addict is working out. I feel like crying sometimes when i go too long(a few days) wihtout workingout. Especially now that im almost 6months out and i eat a hell of a lot moree than before.I get so scared that im eating to the point of weight gain. Myrealistic side tells me it's almost impossible considering how few calories i take in, But my crazy, semi malnurished, delusional side just feel like im going to gain it all back right this minute if i dont go for atleast an hour jog.

aww god bless u too bekind. We got your back! goodluck

to: pnw i cannot believe u have a daughter that old u look awesome. And i agree about people and their mean comments, even i on occasions put my foot in my mouth and accidentally offended someone. but unfortunately that's not the case with people like my sister and cousins, They say things with the purpose of offending me,smh (god i can't wait to be thin so i can rub it in their face, lol) And the map means exactly that. Since my 1st carribean cruise at 19 i've a always managed to find a way to leave the country as much as possible,lol as crazy as it is overhere the ny/nj area can get alittle old. For my bday this april im going to ghana(visit my parents), paris and amsterdam all in one month,lol (crazy but i love it) hopefully by then i'll be 165lb or less. And this is my 1st real "debute" traveling as a slimmer girl for years and i haven't had a date with a boy i actually like in forever so i'm actually Kinda hopeing for a little summer romance in europe *fingers crossed*...

To- pnw218 that's a really good question. And i can't believe how similar all our experiences has been. I think i am gonnabe one of those people who take this secret to my grave. It's funny cause my whole life my weight has fluctuated and everytime it got alittle higher (like 5'6 1/2 140s at 14years old) I will be getting called fat by my parents and my sister and my extended family will have some embarrasing meeting where they make fun of me about my weight and try to disguise it as an "interviention". And then as an adult the same people would say the most hurtful things in the most embarrasing ways about my growing size. So thanksgiving 2008 when i expressed my interest in the lapband(at the time) all of a sudden "you're not that big" really?!?! cause my whole life you guys made me feel like PRECIOUS,lol. And my sister mentioned that i will be too skinnyif i had the surgery( but she meant was i would be skinnier THAN HER) A lot of the younger women in my family are about 10-20lbs overweight but they're normal looking and they're "not fat" so they feel like their bodies are fine. and anything less than what they look like is underweight to them. even though if they check their bmi(and guts) they would see they're overwieght. But back to the question- yes i have been told that i am too skinny to have the surgery and if i do have the surgery i will be too skinny. but what i do is i look at the person that's telling me that. i have some overly competative women in my family( all within my age range) and when i gained the weight i do believe alot of them was secretely/not so secretely happy about it. So when they say something about how i shouldn't have surgery i believe they just want to have the advantage of being the skinnier sister/cousin. coopersmomma- don't sweat the haters if it takes not telling them anything thaen so beat it. casue some people are supposed to be left in the dark because when they find out certain things they use it against u.