ifyourstomachoffendsyou

Hi Everyone, Was in class today from 7:30-5. I'm brushing up on and getting more ideas for using Interactive Metronome to help kids with all kinds of learning problems. It's like Occupational Therapy to a beat. For some reason it helps dyslexia, Learning Disabilities of all kinds, ADHD, Cerebral Palsy, Autism, Sensory Integration, Parkinson's Disease, Traumatic Brain Injury. It works better than OT by itself. It retrains or rewires the brain where the glitches are occurring. I might get a set-up for my classroom. I ordered it with my extra Title I funds but that's no guarantee it'll be approved by CPS (Chicago Public Schools) who administer and approve the funding. It's hard for them to see the connection between doing physical movements (that tap a sensor that measures and provides feedback to how close to the beat you are) and huge improvements in memory, attention, reading, and math, but the scientific evidence and studies are there. It works because it fixes the glitches interfering with learning. So I'm still recovering from being up all night with my dad the night before last, but I slept well last night and was pretty with-it throughout today's seminar. Lots of hands-on and discussion though, and that always helps. My parent's 60th anniversary is coming up in a couple of weeks. That's pretty amazing. Back to work early tomorrow. My boss told me today that I can use my sick days for family leave and there is a former Discovery teacher who is available to sub for me. So I'm free to be there for Rachel and my parents as needed. I had a very hard time telling people at work Friday about what was going on. That really made it very real for me. I've posted a connection to a support page started for her on FB. She already has almost 200 supporters. As a former cop and with her husband still a cop the whole "blue" family is standing behind them. I'm going to give her a call now and see if she's talking. She doesn't always want to talk to people and screens her calls. I hate being the one screened out, but her moods have been highly unpredictable. I'm hoping we can achieve more closeness again. I want to be more than her babysitter. Cheri

Thanks for the love and prayers everyone. Rachel has been difficult emotionally for over 9 months. Knew she had thyroid issues and female issues but the breast cancer may have been contributing as well. Going to be in a training session for work all day tomorrow. Going to bed early to make up for little sleep last night with my father. He kept waking up in pain and out of it, trying to stand up without nurse to help and trying to pull out his IV. Much better this morning when my mother came to stay with him Hopefully he was finally able to pee in the bottle so he can go home. Janet, both are going to a retirement village by my brother in MI in May. We've got to help them pack up a 45 yr stay in their home. Plus I have two grand babies due end of April. I also have to keep on teaching school. I did confront husband. We've resolved things pretty well. Don't need to deal with DH issues while all this other stuff is going on. Got resolved fairly quickly after he'd experienced the emotional wall I put up for several days. Told him when he says cruel things its often the signal that he's going into one of his "funks" that can last for months and that I don't need that right now with all I'm going through. He seemed to hear that. So household tension is greatly reduced. Cheri

Everyone. No time to read or post. My daughter has aggressive breast cancer, it is in her lymph nodes and it is stage B or C. Don't know what all that means but I'll be finding out. She will probably have a bilateral mastectomy. In addition with the ovarian cyst which will also have to be biopsied she will be needing a complete hyst. My dad is going into the hospital early tomorrow morning for have his badly broken dislocated elbow put back together. Its been 5 days since he broke it and there are abrasions so its open as well and danger of infection. So I'm leaving school early tomorrow hopefully and going to the hospital to stay overnite with him so my mother can go home. With his dementia and anaesthetic and pain meds, he needs a relative to stay with him. My sister the Dr. says no one should ever be left alone without an alert and competent relative with them in the hospital at all times. This has really underscored the need to get my parents into that retirement village where my brother the Dr. can keep a close eye on them and help will be available to them at any moment. They're moving probably by May. I have 2 grandchildren due end of April as well. Will try to keep in contact as much as possible. Need your prayers and support. food and exercise are not pretty right now. Pray I'll be able to avoid major damage to myself and that I'll find time to take care of myself as well as everyone else. Cheri

Feb. 25 12 a.m. Laura-hugs

I got to play the devil in a skit in chapel today. Hysterical. Also sang in a quartet. Great blend of voices. Went and made phone calls after school to raise money for the school again. If any of you have watched "Waiting for Superman" you'll know why Roseland Christian is an important alternative to our failing public schools, particularly in "at-risk" areas of the city. I think of one 70+ grandmother who has custody of her grandson after his father died. She went back to driving a CTA bus in order to send Marquise to Roseland Christian instead of a public school. How'd you like to be 70+ and driving a city bus in Chicago. Marquise is the one who said, "Mrs. Flory loves all of us, we just get on her nerves sometimes!" Pounds. I've decided to have mini-goals on my way to my goal of getting back to 160# just like I did while losing the weight. I'm stabilizing at 165 right now and then I'll work for getting to 164 and stabilizing and then 163 and so on. Works much better for me than the all or nothing thinking that says I want to lost the 5 #'s right now! Then when I don't, I eat. All or nothing thinking. Huge part of our stinkin' thinking. Cheri

I'm here but not much time to post. Phone-a-thon for Roseland Christian School tonight and made calls. Last night 2 1/2 hrs of choir. Ketosis--google it. I learned a lot about it when I was doing Atkins. If you eliminate just about all carbs and eat a lot of Protein you start burning fat at a high rate and lose weight fairly quickly. Not good to be in ketosis for long periods of time but it takes a few days to really achieve it. Your blood sugar stays very low and doesn't spike. You start burning off belly fat where a lot of our fat is located. Janet, because of a nasty comment in response to me wanting a kiss from my DH in public, I've basically cut off physical contact and endearments from me to him. To all appearances my DH and I are relating normally. I'm simply not affectionate. No hugs, kisses, cuddling or endearments. No waiting around for him to want to do something with me. Just do my own thing and make my plans without him. Nothing nasty. Just protecting myself from further abuse until he decides to deal with the situation he caused. Lori, pray all goes well. Julie, mygranddaughter did the same thing to her own hair and my daughter did some damage to her own years ago. Happens to a lot of kids. Linda, hope things get resolved for Aylah's sake. She seems so precious. Gotta go to bed. Cheri

Laura, so glad you had a great BD. I am off today but have eye Dr. apptmt this afternoon and choir tonight. Going to stop by my parents today, too. Maybe see my grandsons this afternoon. My DH is also off today. We'll see how well we avoid each other. It's almost like a game. Not fun, but at this point necessary for my sanity. Went and walked for an hour at the community center. Rainy here and gloomy. My grandsons could not get enough of being with me last Saturday. Especially David. I had gone to see their soccer games earlier in the day and took them out to McDonald's. Then I went and got my granddaughter and took her home with me for the evening and my daughter and her husband dropped the boys off at my house while they went out to eat. So I gave my daughter a break from them and them a break from her. Joshua and Leah are both 3 yrs old so they played together really well. David glued himself to the the Wii and practiced every game he could figure out on my Wii Fit PLus. Leah and I played Barbies and I set her up to do some coloring before they got there. I don't see her nearly as much as my other grandchildren so it was fun to have some alone time with her. Then, back to the saltmines tomorrow. I really do love my work. Cheri

Hi everyone. I've been reading and keeping up. Just busy. Went out Friday night with hubby. Had a great meal and then went to Border's. I was feeling all mushy because it was sort of our Valentine's Day/Anniversary combo so I asked him for a kiss, which he gave me in public. I asked him again later, however, and he balked and told me I was trying to control him. I told him it was so sad that he thought that way and he made a nasty comment that took my breath away. It still hurts. This is something I always have to remember with him. I never know when the worm is going to turn and how long it will stay turned. Sometimes it lasts for months. So now we'll be civil and considerate but affection will not be part of our relationship. That will be my choice. It seems to be the only thing that gets through to him and it protects me from getting hurt again while he goes through one of his phases. It is my boundary. Trying to talk about it is a lost cause and only prolongs or exacerbates the hurt. So I go back to making my own life. Whatever he chooses to be a part of is fine. Whatever he doesn't, oh well. Last night I had three grandchildren over for several hours and had a great time with them. He chose to stay in bed. His loss. Today, I have to go check on my parents. My dad and mom were at their senior center, about to go swimming. My dad was opening double steel doors when someone came through from the other side and crashed into him. At first he didn't feel the pain but a few hours later was telling my mom it really hurt and when she looked he was bloody and bruised on his elbow. So they went to the ER last night and he has a delocated elbow. I have to call her now and see whether he got sent home and what's happening. They have decided to move to MI to that retirement village which has a memory assisted wing for my dad to transfer to eventually and will provide all stages of care until they pass. It's only because the MI economy is in such bad shape that they can afford to go there. Borders is having a going out of business sale at one of their stores so I might go there today. Monday I'm off school but have a 1:45 p.m. eye Dr. apptmt that kind of makes it hard for me to make plans. However, I'm going to make sure I get to my daughter's. She needs a breast biopsy on a lump and has to have a half hard, half bloody ovarian tumor/cyst removed in March. She's been in a lot of pain for a long time but didn't go in to get the test which was ordered last Sept. Her mental condition made her too exhausted and she's so overwhelmed with her two boys (oldest Autistic) that she just didn't take care of herself. So I'd appreciate your prayers on her behalf. food is OK. Not gaining, not losing. Not perfect. Struggling again today with grief. Sang in choir this morning and singing always puts me in touch with my emotions--good and bad. Pastor this morning talked about bad things happening in our lives resulting in us having a testimony. Someday I know I will, and even ocassionally now I can talk about it and share in a powerful way. Today, I'm just feeling the pain. But this too, shall pass. God remains good all the time, and all the time, God is good. Even in times of pain and struggle. Cheri

Linda, the post by Kaye Bailey was very thought provoking, and provoking, and provoking.... LOL. Actually, I found it very interesting. Most days, mostly Protein. But I understand the need for an occassional treat. The trick for me is to most times make the snack high protein or at least low-carb. Like Janet, its best to save the treat for at night when the cravings are strongest. But she is right. We can't do it often or we're on that slippery slope to real snacking on all the carb and fat laden sliders we used to love. Janet, I don't enjoy restaurants anymore because if I stick to dense protein (if I can even get it in a restaurant) I can't eat a lot of it (3-4 oz just ain't much) and I feel like I've wasted the experience and my money. Plus I'm totally tempted by the great carbs they offer and I feel deprived if I don't eat them and guilty if I do. Solution: stay out of restaurants except for a very occassional treat. Right now I can't even go to Borders to read a book because the flavored coffees with whipped cream are more than I can resist. So, question. Does talking about our cravings increase them or help take the power out of them? Just about any combination of chocolate candy, ice cream, and whipped cream or eaten separately are almost irresistable for me. I can't have them in the house (my husband keeps his hidden or keeps flavors I'm not fond of in the fridge). How do you resist cravings? Have to tell you about Taniko, the eighth grader who said I was a beast in my "skinny jeans" which were actually leggings. I'm in the middle of going over story problems with him and an eighth grade girl and he says to her, "Isn't Mrs. Flory a beast? She was a beast in her skinny jeans, but she has swag. The way she cuts her bangs is swag." This is probably the funniest thing to happen to this 59 year old white lady in a long time. This kid is priceless. A royal pain in the tush half the time and totally disarming the next. He has no inhibitions. Cheri

Been reading more Kaye Bailey. I have a better understanding of why we are not supposed to drink for half an hour before, during, or half an hour after a meal. And why that meal needs to be lean dense Protein without much liquid or sauce added to it. When we eat protein we burn up fat. I'm trying to remember the words, something about 30 % higher thermogenic? burn. That's why substituting carbs for the protein, even though you may be consuming fewer calories, keeps you from losing weight. Your engine doesn't work as hard to digest the carbs and use them for fuel as it does protein. The harder your engine has to work, the hotter it gets, the more fat it burns. And the discomfort you feel when you eat dense protein and your inability to eat a lot of it is your band telling you to stop eating. Dense protein, unaccompanied by liquids that turn it into a slider, is the best food for signalling fullness and increasing satiety by staying in our pouches for much longer periods of time. Fatty meats slide through and even dense meats will slide through more quickly when accompanied by liquids. So really, the 5th day of the 5DPT is the way you are supposed to eat most of the time. Lean, dense Proteins, chewed very slowly and very well. That's why, if you gain weight and make yourself too tight, you can't even eat the dense proteins that will help you lose weight and you may need an unfill in order to start eating right again. So the 5DPT is not just a test of your pouch, to see if you need a fill, it may indicate a need for an unfill, or it may get you back on the road to eating the right way so that you don't need an unfill. That's why we eat protein first. After three or four oz of protein, then we add veggies and a little fruit. The amount of protein should range from at least 65 g a day to well over 100 g a day. Its hard to get in that amount if you're not putting protein first. That's all I'm remembering right now. Maybe Linda has some of the details down more exactly. Kaye has a really interesting article on how to eat popcorn, which is one of the worst carbs you can eat. She suggests doing it with the no drinking for half an house before, during, or half an hour after. As long as we don't turn it into a slurry by adding liquid, it will sit in our stomachs a long time and we won't be tempted to keep eating it. I think she suggests limiting to one cup. And she suggests doing it only once or twice a week. Her experience has been that it makes you so uncomfortable, you're not likely to do it again soon. Cheri

I had liquid Protein after my surgery. I didn't mess around with carbs of any kinds. SF jellos and puddings. No carbs got me off to a great start. SF Yogurt. had things like refried Beans which are high protein. No mashed potatoes or oatmeal or carbs of any kind. I was told no carbs so I did no carbs. Baby food meat works too. Scrambled eggs with a little LF cheese. Couldn't eat much of it but I ate frequently. Cheri .

Wow! I sure miss our West Coast ladies junking up the thread. So, I'm struggling today to not have many carbs. I am planning on a salad tonight and I put some dried fruit and cashews in that with raspberry vinaigrette so I'll be getting carbs then, but I do put in Feta cheese to get my Protein. I really find the Protein drinks are the easiest thing to do, sometimes twice a day. It's going to take me a while to lose the other 5 lbs I gained since I can't exercise as much due to injury and bad weather. I can't wait till I can walk outside again. I hate having to drive even a few miles to walk around an oval track with no view. Feel like a horse with blinders on. Went to eye Dr. this morning. Had to see an opthalmologist because of my Sjogrens Syndrome and the medication I have to take for it. I need to be monitored by an opthalmologist. I also needed new glasses, as usual. Otherwise I'm bored out of my mind. Perfect conditions for overeating. Limited physically, nothing to do, nowhere to go, no money to spend, no one to talk to. I signed up for Groupon but you have to make an immediate decision whether to buy things on there, and they still cost too much and most of the things don't interest me. I hate salons, and massages, and mani pedis which seems to be the main thing they offer. My ADHD goes crazy in those places. I'm trapped in a chair or on a table. I know no one and I never feel prettier or more relaxed when I leave. In fact, I usually feel poorer and uglier and tense and like I just wasted a lot of time and money. Not that I get anything done at home on days like this. I don't get at cleaning projects unless I've got people coming over. Read for a while but my eyes get so tired. Dr. prescribed eye drops which I should try now but my prescription shows that I don't have a strong enough strength for reading. My husband sleeps days so I can't do much of anything around the house. Eating out is no longer a pleasure since there's so much I can't eat and I can't eat much unless I order sliders. Plus we have to stop spending money. Going to Europe is eating up all my extra $. I have to keep telling myself its going to be worth it. My weekends have gotten so boring with my husband working nights and sleeping days, and my grandchildren less and less availbable, and hardly anybody posting on weekends. If I could just get outside and walk it would help tremendously. I'm not one to call people up and talk on the phone. Nothing on TV. Can't read because of my eyes. Aargh. Depressing. Sandi, are you out there? Tomorrow might be a good day to meet and discuss the June 9,10, 11, 12 reunion here in Chi-town. How's Charlie doing? A highlight this week has definitely been reading people's posts about how bad it got for them before the band. I appreciate everyone's honesty. I was just thinking about how I used to look in the mirror and not be able to see my own face. It felt like my features were held hostage by the fat. I think I'm going to call my sisters or brothers or maybe my old friend I'm starting to reconnect with. Cheri

I'm gutting it through my last day of 5DPT. I think 4 lbs will be my total loss, 5 with the loss before starting the 5DPT. Now for what Kaye Bailey calls Day 6. I'm going to read more about what she says, but the fact is, I know I have to keep eating like I have on the 5DPT most of the time. That's how I lost before and that's how I maintained. KISS Keep It Simple Stupid Mostly Protein most days. Exercise as able. Kristi, welcome. Sandi, Chris, Jessica, Melissa,Candace? Anyone else out there? I'm truly enjoying everyones's stories. Keep them coming. We need those reminders.

Wow! Great stories! This is exactly what we need to keep ourselves on track. Having gone to Alanon for many years and attended open AA meetings to hear special speakers and having hung out with a lot of recovering Alcoholics, a lot of their phrases stick in my head. When someone relapses they'll say, "It takes what it takes. There but for the grace of God go I." "They're not ready yet." "They haven't gotten sick and tired of being sick and tired." Many of them refer to themselves or others as "rehab rangers" because they relapsed and went to rehab so many times. A hospital in Dyer, IN had an emergency short-term rehab known as the "Dyer dryer" mostly for falling down drunks. Some of the recovering alcoholics I'd met had been there several times. Over and over again, every alcoholic who spoke was willing to tell his/her story in jaw-dropping detail and honesty. Helping other alcoholics recover was the key to their own recovery. Honesty about one's past and present is stressed to the max. That's got to be part of our recovery, too. We have an addiction. It brought us places we never wanted to go. We didn't grow up thinking, "I want to be a morbidly obese food addict when I grow up." We are horrified to find ourselves there. And we can never forget. To do that we need to share our stories in all their embarrassing details. How about having trouble wiping your butt or getting all your parts clean? Wondering what that smell is and realizing its you? Trying to clip your toenails with your stomach hanging between your wide spread knees? This is a serious life-threatening-shortening illness. Embarassing. Gross. Ugly. We think we only affect ourselves, but what about the children we robbed of quality time with us? The $ we spent on food that could have been spent improving the lives of our families and beyond? The employer's and insurance companies and the government (the American people) we ripped off with our inability to do our jobs to the best of our abilities and the ailments whose cost got absorbed by our families and the rest of society? Take your bands seriously. Treat them right. Take your disease seriously. Are you ready to do whatever it takes to be "clean and sober?" Cheri

Phyll, thank you so much for posting that. Incredibly inspirational! I know many of us are not at our ultimate goal, but we still have many things to celebrate and remembering how bad it was is an incredible incentive not to go back. I hope more of you post. We need to remember and we need to be honest. It really was bad. It really was horrible. And we don't want to go back!!!!!!

Done with Day 3 of 5DPT. Wine does have carbs, but the less sweet the wine the lower on the glycemic index. I've taken off 4 lbs as of this morning, so we'll see what I am tomorrow morning. I'd already lost a lb before starting the 5DPT. I mostly used Protein shakes and SF pudding and mousse the first two days. Half and half in my coffee. Today I had Protein shake, 2 small pork sausages, 4 small meatballs with a little 4cheese Pasta sauce. 1 Atkins Peanut Butter chocolate Protein Bar and Italian sausage in spaghetti sauce for supper. Felt band but didn't pb. Kids all over the school were trying to sell me candy bars today. The 4th-8th grade choir members (almost all the kids in those grades) are earning themselves a trip to Great America where they will also perform. Monday night I was at a meeting with brownies and choc. covered pretzels and other goodies. I took along my SF pudding and mousse. Tonight I was at a meeting after school that had frosted brownies, fresh baked choc chip Cookies, and pita chips with spinach dip. Just kept thinking about what I was planning for supper to keep my mind off of it. Probably eating almost 1000 calories a day, probably more today, but I have never kept track of calories. But I know I will continue to lose as long as I keep the carbs to a minimum. I'm feeling physical hunger, which I wasn't allowing myself to feel before, but I don't let that go on very long because physical hunger can lead to insatiable eating. I'd rather eat Protein more frequently and stave it off. So, 5 lbs off. 5 lbs to go. It was the physical pain and limitations combined with snow confinement that really got me gaining the past couple of weeks. Plus, as I gained weight, I couldn't eat as much solid protein because it made me pb as my band got tighter. So I turned more to sliders to feel full and like I'd eaten enough. So some denser protein the next 2 days along with softer Proteins. Such a relief to be able to eat enough meat in one sitting to feel satisfied. I've been hanging from my inversion table for longer periods of time and it is gradually stretching out my compressed and distressed spinal column and hip. Still have pain but I made myself do my stairwalk for 15 minutes yesterday and 30 minutes today. Have to keep the muscles strong to hold the spine and hip in place. Really tired by the end of the school day though. LadyK, try two or 3 days of Liquid Protein like I did and see if helps. One of the reasons I'm doing the 5DPT is to avoid ever having to go in for an unfill. I don't want to end up with all the reflux, pbing, hiccups, etc. that come from being too tight. I'd rather do whatever it takes to lose the weight before I get really bad. I must say, everyone's horror stories have really motivated me to get this 10 lbs off. I'd really like to see everyone post about what it was like for them before they got the band, why they got the band, and the improvements they've seen and the NSV's they've experienced since getting the band. One of my incentives for getting this 10 lbs off is that I don't want to have to buy a new, larger wardrobe--again. Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt and had it framed. Those were old behaviors. Lose/gain, lose/gain, lose/gain. When I cleaned out my closet this time, it was with the determination to keep only one size it. I only have enough clothes to fit in that one closet. I have better things to do with my money than buy clothes that only fit for a while. I want to wear out my size 10 pants, not outgrow them. LOL. Cheri

I have a little thing I do that really has worked for me. I usually don't get stuck often. Has happened twice with Eva since we've been here. Gabbing, one extra bite and it might hit. I put my fists into my armpits and pump like I am doing the chicken dance. Granted, you might not want to do this in the middle of a restaurant...head to ladies room or outside. It most always works for me and no food popping back up. Sorry for your mom's continuted troubles. Hugs. Apples, I got a great visual on that. Would pay $ to see that. Wish I were with you and Eva and Janet and Phyll. West Coast reunion. Hope you all can make it to the Midwest reunion. Laura, I've not had any Tramadol now for two days. Didn't like the fact that I kept waking up at night. Very relaxed from muscle relaxer but figured something was in the Tramadol just like Vicodin. Plus, it wasn't working that well on my pain. Supplemented my regular anti-inflammatory with arthritis strength acetiminophen and got more relief. I've also been hanging from my inversion table which has been slowly stretching out the spine and surrounding muscles and relieving the pain in my neck, lower back and hip. So, no trouble getting off the Tramadol. Been on liquids for two days. Protein drinks and SF pudding. Love the new Jello chocolate SF Mousse. They have choc. mint, too. Unfortunately, SF means sugar alcohols which means lots of gas. Amazing how the weight is melting off. Hopefully, with soft Proteins tomorrow and then the harder proteins I hope the carb cravings are gone. When I think about what I went through before and after the surgery because I was so determined to get the band and shrink my liver enough to get the 1 incision surgery. I gritted my way through liquid diets and then gradual reintroduction of food, then Bandster Hell while I hung on by my fingernails until I could get to my first fill, which wasn't enough, and then the second fill and adjusting to that. Then getting to goal and beyond. Reached one year of having the weight off last month. A year ago I had my feet knocked out from under me and had all kinds of body pain and limited movement while I healed. Stuck to my food plan. Didn't gain and eventually lost more. Back up to where I was last January but I'll be dipped if I'll go any higher and I'm determined to get back down and stay there. I don't want my clothes to not fit. I don't want to buy a bigger size. I like being in size 10 pants. I like wearing a large in tops and some mediums. I want to be able to walk all over Europe on my tour and sing my heart out and totally enjoy myself. I don't want to go back on blood pressure meds or increase my cholesterol and pain meds. I want my eighth grade students to continue to think that I'm a "beast" in my leggings. I want to be able to play with my grandkids. I want to be able to dance with my husband. I wanted to be able to look down and see my feet. All the reasons for losing weight are still valid as reasons for keeping it off. I think all of us need to list the reasons we went through the torture of getting the band and why we wanted to lose the weight. Some of us are at our ultimate goal and some of us have settled for major improvements. And that's OK. But if don't want to end up back where we started we have to stay hungry, not for food, but for a healthier, more manageable life. For many of us, this time of year is the hardest. We don't see the sun, we can't get outside, it's hard to get to where we can enjoy exercising. So this is the time to remember how far we've come and why we've come this far. Cheri

Wow! Quick fly-by. Laura and Arlene, hugs on the pb's. Weight gain is usually responsible for the difficulties. I know Kashi would make me pb. I can't do grains. I'm surprised after the very strong post on carbs that I didn't get any pms. Of course, I'm not sure I'd get notified or be able to find them. LOL. I have this thread listed as my favorite and go right to this and nothing else on LBT. Some people just take themselves too seriously and are too sanctimonious. They need to get a life then maybe they'd have something to post about. Gotta go to choir. CBL Cheri

Linda, those mushrooms sound yummy. I love stuffed mushrooms when they have flavorful cheese in them. I also love them stuffed with sausage and cheese. Arlene, nobody told me who to be for in the Super Bowl so I don't have to watch it. Thank God! Been going to a different church in order to get some good music again. Love it. Not ready to switch churches yet. I'll give the new music directors a chance, but music is crucial for me. I can't sit there with my eybrows raised to my hairline hoping it'll help get all the flat voices back in pitch and wincing when they're really off. My hip, lower back, and neck are all paining me, so I'm going to try to get into the doc this week and get another shot of Torodol, see if I can quiet it down. Am also going to run out of the muscle relaxer and Tramadol the ER doc prescribed and I need them to function at work so the pain doesn't overwhelm me. Tried to go for a walk today at Community Center track; went slowly and babied my neck, but my hip just didn't like it. Saw "The King's Speech" today with DH. Loved it. Traveled a few hours yesterday to see my niece's cheerleading team compete downstate in the finals. Got a chance to visit with my extremely busy sister. Their house is slowly being put back together after the stove caught on fire and melted the microwave and blistered the nearby cabinets and filled the house with soot. No stove yet. House is clean but things still need replacing and repainting and new cabinets. Like they don't have enough on their hands. But the new trial medication that has not yet been approved by the FDA has kept Olivia seizure free for almost a month. However, the snowstorm kept their resupply from getting to them on time this past week and they ran out for the weekend. She had just reached optimum dosing, too. Pray it gets there on Monday. Will be off LBT tomorrow and maybe Tues. with meetings and choir and hopefully a Dr.s apptmt.

Hit back space a couple times and lost my post. Aargh. Main point. I am more powerful than my disease. I am more powerful than depression, injury, painful relationships, age, physical pain, uncooperative relatives, and cravings. When I fall off the horse I need to pick myself up, dust myself off, and get back on again. I control what goes into my mouth. No one is holding a gun to my head force feeding me carbs. I know what works. I know what triggers cravings. I can't have carbs. Period. End of story. I have 10 lbs to lose. Thank God I preplanned for relapse and lost 10 extra lbs and am still at an acceptable BMI. But I don't like the extra weight around my middle (which is exactly where I gained it. I don't like feeling sick and having my heart race after a carb binge. And I want to arrest this weight gain before it goes any farther. I rely on God, but he doesn't do the work for me. If I want a reprieve from my carb cravings I have to stop eating carbs. The cravings will subside. There is no easier softer way. There is no easy answer or solution. But if I tough it out for 5 days of no carbs, it will be much easier. Like Linda said, just for today, just for this moment, I will not eat carbs. One moment at a time, I can do without carbs. That's my part of the food equation. To deal with life I use the serenity prayer. "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Cheri

I can only speak for myself and for the things I've read up on. For me, fruit triggers carb cravings big time. I can't stop eating it. I am borderline diabetic which makes me insulin resistant and highly sensitive to all carbs, even the supposedly low glycemic ones. Apples make my stomach growl with hunger shortly after eating one. One grape is never enough. The basic rules of the band are simple but we try to cheat all the time, especially with fruit. We are supposed to eat Protein first and foremost and mostly. Then, after we've had our protein, we can add some vegetables, then, if there's room, a little fruit. We should not snack on fruit because without the protein it will shoot our blood sugar up and create cravings. We should not eat fruit first for the same reasons. Fruit keeps our carb cravings alive and well. It keeps us from losing weight because it takes us out of ketosis. Some of us are able to limit our fruit intake but I see those who eat a lot of fruit doing extreme calorie restriction because they don't lose weight easily. If they eliminated the fruit, they could probably eat more calories. The fact is, you can eat more calories if you stick to protein and have very little carbs. You should increase your good fats and the fats that are in meat and dairy and you will not gain weight you will lose weight as long as you're not eating carbs. Your body will burn the fat instead of the carbs and you will lose weight. The fats and protein will bring your cravings under control once your body gets rid of the carbs. It may take a few days to get to that point and you may have to hang on by your fingernails for a few days until you've purged yourself from carbs. At the end of a meal of protein with a little veggies, a strawberry or two or a wedge of apple won't raise your blood sugar but they will if you eat them first or alone. Frankly, I would not add fruit back into your diet until you've completely eliminated carbs for at least a week or two. Also, water(liquids) should not be taken for at least half an hour before, during, and half an hour after a meal. Your food will stay in your pouch longer and you will experience a lot less hunger if you follow that simple rule. Do not add a lot of sauce to your meat as it turns it into a slider and it will not stay in your stomach and make you feel full. If you follow Kaye Bailey's pouch test you will get back on track. Once you are eating denser Proteins she stresses only eating the meat you can eat in 15 minutes chewing well and slowly. Everytime you get hungry eat protein. You should not be able to eat more than a cup of food or 3 to 4 oz of dense meat at a time if you have proper restriction and if you haven't stretch out your pouch. Following the pouch test will shrink your pouch back where it belongs. If you follow her guidelines you will not have to track calories or pts or carbs to the point of insanity or rebellion. We all know what protein and meat are and we all know what carbs are. Step Away From The Carbs. Does that mean I follow this all the time? No. I blow it. Frequently. But if I get back on it and follow the KISS formula-Keep It Simple Stupid- I can get back on track without much damage and lose the weight very quickly. We all use the excuse that fruits and nuts are good for you but they are not good for us if they trigger carb cravings. We are not normal when it comes to food. We can not eat what might be good for people who do not have our disease. If it triggers our cravings we can't eat it. If it keeps us from losing weight even though we're on a starvation diet we can't eat it. I am writing this for me just as much as I am for you. I, too, am struggling with the never-ending winter blues. I am struggling with going stir-crazy, with a daughter who's been distant and hurtful, with the horrible deaths of two of my students, with arthritis pain exacerbated by automobile injury, with a high stress job. I have gained weight. 80% of us gain back 10-30 lbs. Of that 80%, 20% gain it all back. We need to arrest that trend and get back to that grim determination that made us fight for the band and fight to get the weight off. It was horrible being fat. It was horrible not being able to move my body with any agility. It was horrible not being able to keep up or play with my grandkids. It was horrible feeling ugly. It was horrible knowing I was killing myself. I need to remember how horrible it was. I do not want to go back there. Today I was able to easily maneuver from the passenger side of a vehicle to the driver's side in order to get out of the car because the passenger door was wedged against a snow bank. I couldn't have done that before. I can turn over in bed easily and sleep on my stomach. I can climb 47 steps in a row at work and not breathe hard. I can lay on the bed with my grandson's and wrestle with them and grab and tickle them balance them up in the air on my feet and chase them or get chased by them all over the house. I can dance with my husband. I can walk for an hour. Get angry at your disease not at yourself. Go after it with single-minded determination the same way you would if you had cancer. Do not give up and do not give in. Post your feelings, admit your failures, ask for help, and follow the rules of the band. Protein First, Foremost, and Mostly Some Veggies A Tiny Bit of Fruit If You Still Have Room When Hungry Eat Protein No Water For Half an Hour Before, During or Half an Hour After A Meal Plenty of Water or liquids Between Meals Most of us were given this plan by our Dr.'s and nutritionists. JUST DO IT!!!

No school tomorrow, either! The side streets have not yet been tackled in Chicago and neither janitor can get to the school to shovel us out. Our people who plow the lot can't get there till tomorrow so...no school! Fine with me. I just took my meds. Soaked in a hot bath all afternoon. Not doing too badly but my neck feels weak. Just taking it easy. My DH has been working on the driveway all afternoon. I think he's finally done. He'll have to take a nap before he leaves at 10:30 to go to work. Last night he didn't have to go in. They just left the security gates open at the gated community and figured nobody in their right mind would be out on the road except the plows and a few people returning home.

Sounds good Arlene. Just don't eat the macaroni. That Toredol shot seems to have prevented a lot of the inflammation that would have put me in a lot of pain. I've always felt that Toredol is much more effective than steroids. All my other joints don't hurt either. I did take my muscle relaxer and pain killer last night just to make sure I got a decent night's sleep. I woke frequently but not from pain. I was able to get back to sleep. We had lightning and thunder during the snow storm as well as strange sounds from the wind. Getting more snow now after a lull in the storm. Pretty sure we have at least 20 inches here. When the snow stops, the temps are going to drop. If we have wind as well, it will remain dangerous to go outside. We're supposed to get called whether we're having school tomorrow or not. Sandi the weekend in June starts Thurs. the 9th through Sunday the 12th. All are welcome to come any part of that time. I'm off starting Thurs. afternoon and return to work Monday morning. Friday or Sunday might be good days for a walk/marathon but they're usually on Saturday aren't they? I just don't want to make Saturday too complex. Linda, I have been reading Kaye's stuff and ran across the dumping syndrome there. Then I looked up more and read about the racing heart which she didn't talk about. That's when I realized that gastric banders can get a milder version of the syndrome. We still are connected to our old stomachs and first part of our small intestine, however, they've shrunk considerably from the small amounts of food that pass through them so high carb sliders go through them fast into the small intestine where they overload our systems with sugar causing the pancreas to produce huge amounts of insulin which is what causes all the symptoms. No wonder I feel sick and my heart races. Called my parents. They're safe and snug in their house. Neighbors are taking care of snow removal. Calling my sis in TN. They live in Kingsport. My sis might have stayed in town because she's a Dr. and her home in the steep hills can be impassable with ice and snow. Tried to read my sis in Lombard, IL. They've been unbelievably snowed under before we ever got snow. They had a house fire early last week and were in a hotel while the ins. co. got the house and everything in it taken out and cleaned. Some things had to be replaced and repainted and meanwhile kids had to go to school, Art and Kris had to go to work and daughter Olivia had some important Dr. apptmts and tests to be gotten to that have to do with her seizures. She's on a trial medication not yet approved in the States and is also being evaluated for a pacemaker type of implant that senses an oncoming seizure and uses electrical signals to stop it. So I can't get ahold of my sis to find out how they're all doing. Thought I could reach them today, that they'd all be home cause of the storm, but no one answered. They're probably all out shoveling and playing in the snow. I hope. Cheri

Hi Everyone, Snow day tomorrow. I got out from work right on time today as the storm was getting going good. Usually stay till 5 but left at 3:30. Haven't been on here because after school yesterday I was rear-ended and it wasn't even snowing yet. I hit the person in front of me, bounced back, and because I was on a hill and my foot had been jerked off the brake, I rolled into him again. So I got a sandwich style whiplash. Back and forth, back and forth. The second time I hit the guy in front of me, my seat belt was releasing from the first hit so my head grazed the steering wheel and my knee slid into the dash. Not hard, thank God, So I spent the next two hours waiting for Chicago's finest to show up and make a police report involving three vehicles, then drove myself to the ER where I spent 6 hours waiting to see a Dr. who got me a Toredol shot (massive painkiller anti-inflammatory non-narcotic). So went to bed at 2 a.m. and got up at 6:30 instead of 5 a.m. Managed to get through the day knowing tomorrow would be a snow day. Plan to spend it soaking in the tub. Kept wanting to fall asleep all day but once home became wide awake. Don't seem to be in much pain. Toredol is an amazing drug. I was given it with kidney stone and after various surgeries. Morphine makes me sick so did more with Toredol and I think phenobarbitol. Just the Toredol seems to be doing the trick with my whiplash. So far no need for the flexerol they gave me. Sometimes it can take a few days for the full effects of the crash to set in. I'm always afraid of reherniating the discs in my neck. We'll see. So far so good. We're hunkered down for the storm. Anywhere from 18 inches to 24 inches predicted total. White-out blizzard out there and we've got some wierd buzzing going on from the wind that sounds like someone's cell phone on steroids. Bought several books this weekend so I'm in survival mode for the duration. So, I'm planning on Saturday being our Chicago day with evening cruise.It would be a shame for you all to come out and not see any of the sights. For those who want to get out on Thurs or Friday we'll plan mini-outings to Chi-town or elsewhere. But otherwise, Thursday and Friday are for arrivals, food? stamping? and conversation. Sunday will be for brunch, departures, and whatever comes up. Sandi and I will get together and put together a Saturday itinerary for the group. We'll have mini-outings as choices on the other days for those who like sight-seeing and shopping and are getting antsy from sitting around. Cheri

My house is very conducive to sitting around and talking. People can sit upstairs or down. Everyone will be able to fit comfortably in groups downstairs. I also have a fairly large patio for sitting outdoors. June weather in the evenings is usually very comfortable. But I really want to show off my city. So we'd have to make a committment to getting out of bed in time to make a trip downtown worthwhile. We'd have Thursday night and Friday day as people come in and Friday night for talking. food at my house or nearby restaurants. Saturday should be early to rise and get downtown. We could finish that night with the cruise on the lakefront. Perfect for talking or dancing or both. Sunday morning breakfast/brunch at nearby restaurant or at my house. For those not flying out in the afternoon, another trip to Chicago to shop or see what they missed. Those still here Monday can plan for themselves-maybe a trip to outlet mall in Indiana. Or a trip to Amish country. Shipshiwanah. I'd need others to help plan the food and early comers can help shop and prep. I have a small oven, a large oven, a microwave oven, and a toaster/convection oven. Four burners. I have a blender I never use. Maybe we could have demonstrations of favorite Protein shakes and fast, high Protein meals. We can eat outdoors or indoors. I have a patio. Maybe I'll puchase a gas grill by then. I have a charcoal one. We never BBQ. I'm getting excited! Cheri