@sandymax thank you, for so long I put everyone else first, which is good but, let myself decline. It is my time.
@52 thanks.. I'm ready for it, very resolved in my mind and know everything is coming. Just nervous about the actual surgery.
@Mis thank you, it's been a long road and a very emotional bunch of years, lots of personal loss and emotional turbulence. I'm ready to take control.
@Chrys thank you very much, we can all make a list of our blessing and they far outweigh the negative..it's time I realized that and move on. Yes, I'm HORRIFIED about surgery, in fact, I'm a fainter when I have to give a blood sample! I too, feel like you.. if I don't do this, I will never forgive myself.