Boo Boo Kitty

This may be a surprise to many, but I feel lost lately. I feel like I have no idea who I am. Much like a mid-life crisis, but I think on a larger level. I was the fat girl, who made everyone laugh (self defense of course) and was the center of attention. But the fat is gone, and now I feel lost. So who are you once you loose the weight? I do not define myself as "skinny" but before I defined myself as fat. Nothing seems appropriate anymore!

Thanks to everyone for responding, everyone has something great to say! :blushing: Wheestin--I was a model when I was young, I was beyond thin. I was 13, 6 foot tall and about 100 pounds wet. I stayed that way until I got on fertility drugs and pregnant. BUT I also think I was too young to know who I was before then, I got pregnant at 23. Too young to know who you are I think! I have spent a lot of time trying to think about who I am in NON physical terms. Because for me once I say "pretty" "thin" "nice hair" or anything like that I jump to "formerly fat". I don't want to be that girl anymore. I want to feel confident in the room and not preclude conversations about myself with "remember I was fat" or "You didn't know me fat". I think I am constantly putting myself, mo wonder I am so messed up. I feel like I can't make myself happy......

If *I* could really believe it is or is going to stay that way I'd be ok....I guess I am getting OCD or something... BUT THANKS!

:rolleyes2: I am getting a tummy tuck and a breast reduction on the 6th. Scared to death now really as the closer it gets!

Karey I haven't even had my PS yet, and I have made mental notes of all the other things that will still be wrong after it. I worry about my arms, my thighs, my saggy neck, (you may not see it, but I do) and all some little line that has decided to make camp on my forehead. You are not alone. I think maybe it is a bit obesessive on my part, but I feel like I did all the hard work to loose the weight, why don't I deserve to be 100% happy with me??

At first I told no one, and actually got a ton of the "eating disorder" questions, it was quite ridiculas. I didn't tell anyone because I was ashamed. But now I tell anyone who asks. Mostly because I got sick of the eating disorder comments, or others trying to force me to eat. I will say it is completely screwed up, before people tell you that you eat too much, now I eat too little, what do they want? I think telling is always a personal choice. I feel I was forced into it, and now when I tell people I start out with "I used to be 320 pounds." That is a really screwed up way to talk about yourself. Maybe not telling and making people mind their own damn business is the way to go!

The Doctors don't expect you to loose that amount of weight on your own and keep it off most of the time. I mean, seriously if you could you wouldn't need them or the surgery! And weight can be Water, and other things. It can fall off as fast as it got there. I wasn't weighed the day of surgery, but every Dr is different. I wouldn't go in confessing any sins, if they weigh you then explain. Otherwise don't say anything. I honestly think if they have an OR booked, they won't take you off for 10 pounds, again this is WLS, not brain surgery. Good luck and keep us updated!

As they should know! Thanks.

Let's figure it out together then....lol....but as far as playing with the kids I was doing cartwheels (awful fall over ones) with my girls yesterday, I can say honestly I have never done that before and they loved it. It gets better with every pound you loose. Someday you will get to the top of the stairs with no heavy breathing and wonder "hey when did that happen?" Trust me!

lol....thanks.....but actually it hasn't been that easy for me.

Keep up the fantastic work baby! Just don't push yourself until you fall over, we all need you! Hugs!

girlie! you have pushed your body too far and it is screaming back at you!! I am proud of you for exercising, but don't do it so much your body wants to mutanty on you!!!

Good luck to you! I don't know what he will say because every surgeon is different. But just think of the other side of surgery! It is great!

Ya know Neal, it really is sad that it is socially unacceptable for guys to have a belly button ring, cause you belly button deserves some Bling!

Maybe that is what I feel....hmmmm....

Thank you. Now if I could see that then I would be ok! lol..

Rain... I am sorry! Sizing sucks plain and simple! SOON though sweetie you will be far past a 16 and this will be water under the bridge! Luv ya!

Thanks, I am glad I am not alone in this land of confusion. Jj--I think you are on spot! I need to spend time finding out who I am myself. I spent my life as someone else I don't want to be anymore! rharriet--that is me exactly. I used to drink alot when out. Now not so important to me. It confuses my friends.

116 pounds are a piece of cake if you are willing to work it. I lost 160 in 18 months! You can do it with the right frame of mind! Good luck!

Pix--I have to call them for my MIL....thanks for the heads up it is gonna suck! ugh.....do they speak english???

I would call your Dr in the morning. Some don't want you to have it. Only they can tell you what they want you to do. good luck!

Hello to all of my fellow thirty somethings! I am glad to see we are finally getting to know one another! Good luck to the new bandsters and those to be banded! I am 2 years out in August. The band changed my life. I am so glad I am no longer the fat chick I was, but a bit confused now as to who I am. Could be worse though right?? :thumbup:

I know it sucks not to see the scale move, but it really shouldn't be the only way you judge success! I can tell you there were MANY times the scale didn't move for a month and then all of hte sudden, poof 5-8 pounds would fall off, literally overnight. The band forces your body to change old habits, and they die hard. It will happen, give it time and don't judge yourself too hard! Good luck!

Yeah, I was the beautiful fat girl that everyone loved. Now I am clueless as to who I am. Not a good way to raise his daughter. Everyone loves the fat girl, but no one wants to really love her sometimes. Very sad!

Um, no sweetie, it means you are human. Just don't do it again and learn from it! I can tell you I did it on my pre op once as well. I am not even close to a failure. You don't have to accept that you are one, you can change your mind. Just be strong and don't do it again. Next time you want it, go find something else to do with your mouth. Gum, blow bubbles, whatever you need to do. JUST don't cheat again. Once can be forgiven.