kimmie61

My story?  Okay. I have never been the kind of person who likes to write about themselves.  I've never keep a personal diary longer the 2 days.  I find my life, (story) simple and boring.  I find retelling it boring and can't for the life of me see anyone else finding it interesting, but what the heck.  I'll do it anyway.    My name is Kim, I'm 48.  I was a very skinny cute little blonde when I was very young.  Then puberty hit and all hell broke loose.  I shot up to 5'7 by the time I was in 5th grade.  I lived in Hawaii at the time and naturally my teacher was Hawaiian and short, so saying I felt awkward is an understatement.  I "blossomed" at an early age also.  Oh Joy! As if life wasn't tough enough.  I started putting on weight at about 12 or 13.  It started out slow, but it didn't take long for it to get out of hand.  My mother made it hard for me to except my changing.  She'd poke fun at me, and then say it was just a joke.  Most of her jokes were at my expense.  I believe she did it to make herself feel better about herself.  It's sad that people have to knock someone else down to pick themselves up.  When I was 16 I got a job at Taco Bell.  I loved it!!!!!   It got me out of the house, gave me some extra spending money and Oh my god, I got to eat the food I loved best.  Can you see where this is going?  When I started working there I was in a size 9.  When I quit, I was an 18.  You can blame it on the fast food, but nobody twisted my arm to put it in my mouth.  Truth is I self medicated myself with food.  It didn't poke fun at me, or abuse me, and I found comfort in it.  I didn't say it was a healthy comfort, but at a young age you'll take comfort where ever you can get it.  I married right out of high school.  We called it love, but it could very well have been just to get away from my mother, who knows.  Anyway, I  had my three sons by the time I was was 23.  Each time gaining weight, and taking only a fraction of it off.  My blood pressure was a concern also.  I yo-yo'd most of my life, lose some, gain more.  I always thought I had plenty of time to lose it and I was healthy so what was the big deal?  Wrong.  My mother died November 2006,  I went back to Nebraska for her funeral, and at the mortuary I started having severe chest pains, I couldn't catch my breath. My husband, who was suffering with terrible back pains ran to the car, and whisked me off to the hospital, which was only blocks away.  It was there that I had my heart attack.  I coded, and was brought back.  My husband witnessed the whole thing.  I woke up the next day at Nebraska Heart Institute, strapped to the bed, with tubs going into every orifice I had and more IV bags then I've ever seen.  Everyone I knew and loved, crying and hoovering over me.  Having recovered from that, I was now on more meds then I had every dreamed of, and they only contributed to my gaining even more wieght.  Something had to give, and my life wasn't going to be one of them.  So I contacted my doctor, was referred to my surgeon and begain the whole process.  It's been an interesting adventure, but it's all been worth it.  I am far from where I want to be, but at least I can see head and know I will get there.  One step at a time.    If you sat through this whole thing and read it, you're amazing.