jgandg

I really admire your attitude. I am going to take what you say with me when I'm banded in August - to just be patient, and be good to myself. I have a feeling I'll be coming back to read your post again.

Hi again everyone! Glad to see there are so many of us. I am just waiting for 2 things: mypulmonologist to send his report to my surgeon's office (pulmonologist is on vacation, not returning until next week), then surgeon's office can send everything to my insurance company for approval. So I'm hoping my 8/17 date STICKS!!! I can't wait!!!

Having been the heavier one in my marriage, I can say that anything but love and a complimentary attitiude toward my appearance felt like such harsh criticism that it had the opposite effect - I would gain more weight, and feel horribly about myself. Perhaps your wife is picking up on your attitude that she's gaining while you are losing, and that your eyes are wandering? People can pick up things like that, those subtle changes in attitude. Maybe she isn't ready to lose, maybe she never will be. You might think about what that would mean for you. Just because you are getting healthier doesn't mean she is ready to, or ever will be. You have a choice: you can love her, all of her, or you can decide she isn't the person you want to be with anymore. But you can't assume that she is going to change just because you were ready to.

I wanted to just tell my husband, mother, brother, and 3 close friends. I did not want to tell anyone else, b/c like others have said, I didn't want the added stress of being monitored all the time, and having people feel free to contantly ask me how it's going. Well, my mom just told my sister, accidentally.:phanvan I specifically asked her not to tell her, b/c she is very close to my father (my parents are divorced) and my father is one reason I am overweight to begin with - he was constantly monitoring my weight growing up, even when I was thin. So now I need to ask my sister to please not share this with anyone else, i.e. our father, and I really hope she respects my wishes.