debi717

You've all given me some terrific feedback. Thank you so much. PatU, I had to laugh at your remark that it was brave of me to tell my family. Actually, it was rather stupid. What a bunch they are! Believe me, I'm going to avoid discussing it with them going forward. When I do have the surgery (and I really think I will), I'm not telling them until I'm cornered. The only one who has to know is my husband -- hard to hide it from him. All of your answers truly helped me. Your feedback helped me to view the issue with more clarity. Sometimes we get so caught up in the emotion of a decision that it's hard to step back far enough to see the whole picture. This forum and its members are a wonderful source of support. Again, thank you. Debi

I've been having pre-op tests and I've been managing to do it discreetly by taking a sick day here and a personal day there. I really don't want to tell my co-workers why I'm going be out of the office. I just don't want the people I work with monitoring my weight loss and making what I eat their concern. Been there -- "Debi, should you be eating that?" Makes me uncomfortable. When I did the South Beach Diet last year, I think I was scrutinized as much as the department budget. I know most people mean well, but I don't want attention focused on my diet successes & failures. This is my journey, bumps and all. For those of you who didn't share your surgery with your co-workers, what did you tell them? Perhaps down the road, when I feel successful and more confiident in myself, I'd be willing to share my weight loss experience, but in the beginning I'd like to keep it to my immediate family. Any suggestions?

Everytime I take a step closer to surgery, I get nervous. Whenever I think I might want to change my mind and I start to think of reasons why I shouldn't have the surgery, something happens to remind me why I'm doing it in the first place. When I can't tie my shoe, when I see my airplane seat belt extender in my drawer, when I think about that trip to Europe that I don't take with my husband because I can't walk far without my legs and back hurting me -- I say "aha, this is why." I think about my borderline diabetes and high pressure, oh yeah, and there's the arthritis and shortness of breath too. Then I ask myself why I can't just lose this weight without surgery. The answer is because it overwhelms me. I need help to do it. I'm 54 years old, my husband is 58. Life is hard enough and I don't want to waste one more year of my life missing out on making memories. Hope this gives you something to think about. Good luck. Regards... Debi

I went to a lap band support group last night. I'm still pre-op, but the surgeon's office would like patients to attend two support sessions before surgery. I told the group leader that I had a goal weight of 150. I'm 54 years old and I'm 5'6". She told me I was being unrealistic and that I should only expect to lose 65% of my excess weight. What??? Look, I know I'm not going to achieve the weight I was at 30 years old (130-135 lbs), nor do I want to. I'd probably look awful at that weight now. However, 65% of my excess weight would leave me at almost 200 lbs. That's not acceptable. I'll even relent and say that maybe I'll be happy when I reach 155-160. Is this 65% the experience of the folks on this list? Do you get where you want to be? I'm not sure if I want to go through surgery if I'll still end up overweight. I know it's suppose to be about getting healthy, but I'd be less than honest if I didn't say vanity play a part too. I'd really like some honest answers from the group because you all have first-hand experience.

"....imagine the heartbreak a BMI of 'only' 33 instead of 50....." Jack, LOL. Stina, I've never heard of lean body mass. How is it measured? Thank you all so much for your answers. I feel much better about the "65%" statement now. I'm glad to know that it's up to me what I lose, and that it's not predetermined. I took the "unrealistic expectations" to mean that I didn't get to own the responsibility for how much weight I want to lose. Thanks.

Born to lose, I like the 50,000 mile check-up analogy. My sister, who is 51, says we're becoming a high maintenance chics. All these tests are making me a little nervous. I felt perfectly fine until they started these deep dive "just want to make sure" tests. I don't know how to start an over 50 thread, but it really would be nice. I'm looking forward to liking what I see in the mirror too, Deb. Regards... Debbie

I agree that not being honest about the reason for my surgery could get sticky and I'd like to be an inspiration to others who struggle with their weight by letting them know about the lapband, but I don't want to deal with living in a fishbowl at work. The people who will be my greatest support are my family, not my co-workers. I have found that at work it's best to keep personal matters private. Besides, most of the people I work with look terrific. Very few overweight. I would certainly stand out in a group photo. Of course, if I met someone outside of work who I thought would benefit by my lap band experience, I'd be glad to help. Regards... Debi

I am going through pre-op tests. When I went to my PCP for a physical, I wasn't sure how she'd react to my getting a lap band, so I was relieved that she was so supportive of my decision. In fact, she is thrilled that I'm doing it. I'll be 55 in September. I have about 150 lbs. to lose and it really overwhelms me. I hear what your saying about Weight Watchers, Deb. They allowed me 30 points, but I think it was too much food for my age and metabolism. I lost sooooo slowly and that was really discouraging for me. I just couldn't stay positive. Averaging out at 1/2 pound of weight loss a week, it would take forever until I even felt a difference in my waistband. I need a little more incentive than that. I'm concerned about losing slowly with the lap band too, but at least I'll be able to eat less and not feel hungry 24/7. The first doctor I went to really pushed the bypass. After researching the RNY at length, I decided I really couldn't put myself at such a risk for complications. If I were 20 years younger, pehaps I may have given it more consideration -- I don't know. Anyway, I went to a different surgeon who is an enthusiastic supporter of the lap band. I think I mentioned once before that if I'm going to have this surgery, I don't want a doctor who makes me second guess myself. It's tough enough. These pre-op tests have been a real thrill. My doctor sent me for an ultrasound of my abdomen, which has now led to me having a CAT scan tomorrow. Then she sent me for an ecchocardiagram (spelling?) and stress test. When I did the stress test, I was only able to get to 85% of my heart rate. The cardiologist saw something that causes a "little" concern, so now I have to have a nuclear stress test (a stress test that is induced at rest so they can get a picture of my heart at 100% target). A real thrill -- I'm not looking forward to it. I'm feeling like I opened Pandora's box. I'm just hoping everything will turn out fine and I will get the okay for the lap band surgery. I'm anxious to really start seeing this weight come off so I can live a healthier life. Sorry for the long post. I think those of us who are 50+ have some issues that maybe some of the younger folks haven't experienced yet. Your body can take a lot more neglect when your younger. The weight certainly catches up with you when your older. Regards... Debi

Thank you all for some great ideas. I think I like the hiatal hernia. I work with so many women and I don't think they'd let a "female thing" slide by without a lot of questions. I've also worked with most of them for five years, so they wouldn't think twice about asking me what the problem was -- partly out of curiosity, but mostly out of concern. The hiatal hernia is the least likely to tempt curiosity. You were all so helpful. Thank you again.

I've been preparing for getting banded. 18 years ago an ultrasound showed that I had 3 gallstones. The ultrasound I had last week showed no gallstones. Can they go away by themselves? Has anyone ever had gallstones go away without intervention? Not that I'm complaining... just wondering.

I went to a pre-band seminar in NYC given ny Dr. George Fielding. He's in practice with Dr. Christine Ren. Has anyone on the list been banded by Dr. Fielding? Would like to hear your experience.

Bright, The attitude of the surgeon you're seeing in England is THE reason why I continued my search for a different surgeon. I'm not banded yet. I'm in the process of getting letters, tests, etc. The first surgeon I talked with told me, without hesitation, that he felt I'd be happier with the RNY. He believed I would be disappointed in the lap band and that he had a patient who lost 180 lbs. (!) with the lapband, but regretted not getting the bypass. Needless to say, I was really questioning my decision. After hearing back from some of the people on this forum, and doing further research, I decided to stick with my original decision to get the lapband. This is a big decision, and I want the doctor I choose to support my efforts 100%, not cause me to second guess myself. Do yourself a favor and talk to another surgeon, one who is not biased against the band. You want an objective opinion, not a biased one. Regards, Debi

This is so encouraging. I'm in the process of preparing for lap band surgery -- getting my physical, making other appts. I read an article in yesterday's Wall Street Journal comparing lap band sucess to bypass success. The article favored the bypass, but I've been reading posts on this website and it seems to me that so many of you have been tremendously successful. I got to thinking about my age (54), and wondered if all these successes were happening for people who had youth and a more efficient metabolism on their side. It's made me feel better to know that those of you who responded are pleased with your success and would do it again. This is such a big decision. I don't want to find myself in the 1/2 lb. a week weight loss category after surgery. Honestly, if I lose that slowly I would become so discouraged. I went to Weight Watchers last year and after 16 weeks I had lost 8 lbs. Since I need to take off 150 lbs., I threw in the towel. I just couldn't see the big picture looming so far ahead of me. I saw myself counting points until I was old enough to receive Social Security. Anyway, just want to say thank you so much for responding. I appreciate it. By the way, Carlene, you look beautiful. Debi

I went to a pre-band seminar in NYC given ny Dr. George Fielding. He's in practice with Dr. Christine Ren. Has anyone on the list been banded by Dr. Fielding? Would like to hear your experience.

I thought slippage and erosion only happened in a small percentage of people. Reading the different posts, it seems like these things, especially slippage, are a common occurrence. I know the band isn't an easy ride, but it's sounding positively awful. I'm pretty sure I'd deal okay with the small portions and avoiding certain foods, and the occasional pb... but the multiple surgeries and other serious problems I'm reading about are making me think twice about getting the band. I thought the lap band had fewer complications than bypass, or is that just in the beginning, right after surgery? Seems like the band has long-term repercussions. Is it this problematic in the majority of the banded folks? Debi

Thank you so much for taking the time to give me such thorough answers. You have all been so helpful. I feel a lot better now. You gave balance to the posts I've been reading. I'm schedule to attend a seminar on July 6. The surgeon I'm going to be seeing is Dr. George Fielding in NYC. That means trips to the city for followups. However, I hear Dr. Fielding is an excellent doctor.I would have preferred to see someone a little closer to home (I live about 45 miles north of NYC), but there were only two bariatric practices in my area with the cvredentials I sought. The first surgeon I saw wanted me to have an RNY, and the second doesn't accept insurance. Thanks to all of you again. I appreciate your insights and wisdom.

Good to know there's something that helps nausea. Signing off for the night, will check back tomorrow.

Hi, Mary. Guess there's not much you can do about getting a stomach flu. This is probably a stupid question, but is there anything you can have on hand that helps to control nausea?

Hello, everyone. Hope I posted this correctly. Just joined LapBandTalk today. However, I've been browsing posts for a week or so. I haven't been banded yet, but have gone to the required conference and had my initial meeting with the surgeon. I weight 296 lbs and am 5'6". When I told the surgeon I wanted a lap band, he told me I was a better candidate for the RNY. He didn't think I'd be happy with the results that I'd get with the lap band. Have any of you been told this too? I'm middle age and have a goal weight of 145-150 (seems a reasonable weight to me). Is lap band intervention for people with less weight to lose? How about your experience with weight regain? Is it more for Lap Banders than RNY'ers?

Great website, Em. Thank you.

I put the cart before the horse. I don't have an appointment to meet with Dr. Fielding yet. First, I'm going to their conference on July 6. Then I was told I would have to see a psychologist and nutritionist. Then I can make an appointment for the consultation. I wonder how long it will take to get a face-to-face appointment. Dr. Ren does not accept my insurance, BC/BS, but Dr. Fielding will be accepting it as of July 1. The person I spoke to in their office was so nice. She told me she'd had lapband surgery herself. When I asked her if Dr. Fielding had as much experience with lapband surgery as Dr. Ren, she laughed. She said Dr. Fielding had proctored Dr. Ren. The surgeons I went to are in Westchester County. The group is Dr. Cerabona, Dr. Kaul & Dr. Yatco.

Hello, everyone. I've made an appointment for a consultation with a different doctor. His name is Dr. George Fielding and he's in practice with Dr. Christine Julie-Ren. They are located in Manhattan. After speaking with one of their office staff and explaining that the first surgeons I consulted with pushed the RNY over the lapband, I came away feeling so much more encouraged about my original decision to go with the lapband. They have a very positive outlook on the lapband, and if that's the road I choose, I want a doctor who will support my decision. I'm going to attend their seminar on July 6.

Wow, NaNa, 93 is an impressive number. Thank you for the encouragement and congratulations on your success.

This is so encouraging and I am going to attend some conferences given by other surgeons. I'm certainly more valuable than a car and I absolutely should take the time to shop around. Thanks!

Thanks to all of you for your answers. I really would prefer the lapband and was so disappointed when the surgeon told me he would prefer to see me with an RNY. I found your answers helped to reinforce my reasons for wanting the lapband in the first place. I had told the surgeon that I wasn't really too happy about reinventing the wheel. My thinking is that God had a pretty clear idea on how he wanted the anatomy to operate. I don't know that deliberately going in and rearranging His handiwork will end well. Anyway, I'm glad I joined the forum. You can read and read about a topic, but as in most things, you get more insight and clarity from talking to people who have walked the road before you.