I am about to be 23 and I can't help but think to myself, "How did I let myself get like this?" Of, course there are many people who ask themselves this question on a daily basis. And yes, I do know how I got like this - food and sedentary (sort of) lifestyle. Now that I have come to this realization I have the ability to choose change-which I have. I am very excited to go to the seminar about this procedure, even after the ridiculous amounts of research I have done about the Lap band. I also have this feeling of "Hurry up and get this done". But I need to realize that it will take time and I know I am doing the right thing because for the first time in my life I can talk about my weight and what I am going to do about it without crying. I believe that in order for me to get through this I need a support system. This, for me, is a select few I have told about this procedure. My best friend and my roommate are the two I can trust the most and feel great to have the ability to talk to them about my feelings and not be judged. These two are accompanying me to the seminar for support which I am so excited about. I know that this is a life changing procedure and I am more than ready for it. My aunt had gastric bypass a few years back and looks great. Obesity runs in my family - a.k.a we all love food and having a good time. Everything we do revolves food and drinks. I am also worried about diabetes because many of my overweight family members [not direct family but aunts/uncles] have diabetes which was basically caused by being overweight and I do not want that for myself. I am sick and tired of being yo-yo with my weight. I have gained 40 lbs in over 6 months and have been gaining and losing it for as long as I can remember. This weight is ready to leave for good! While talking to my roommate about the lap band I came to the realization that my whole entire life I have never experienced how it was to be "normal weight". I was telling her that I was an overweight 3 year old, 12 year old, 18 year old and now an over weight 23 year old. It will be something so new feeling "normal weight". I do not want to be "skinny" I want to be healthy. I want to be able to run half marathons (maybe even whole marathons since I live in Boston and the Boston marathon would be something to strive for), I want to not have to worry if I will be able to fit in the airplane seat and worry if my thigh is touching the person next to me. I want people to stop saying, "you have a pretty face" - I want to be beautiful all over. I want to be healthy for my family because I want to be a good role model for my "future children". I want to be able to walk up to my apartment and not be out of breath. I want to look forward to taking walks, be able to walk at a faster pace and not worry about the beads of sweat running down my body, feeling self conscious about my RED CHEEKS and be able to have a conversation while walking. I want to feel sexy is a t-shirt and jeans (because c'mon there isn't anything sexier than that). I want to walk into a store and not worry about if the clothes will fit and stop having the feeling like people are looking at you thinking, "nothing in here is going to fit her so why is she in here". Bottom line - I want to feel as beautiful and sexy on the outside as I do on the inside. She is in there - it now comes down to me making the effort to make sure she comes out!