Tired_Old_Man

Jack is in a hotel bar when the most beautiful girl in the world walks in. She is immediately surrounded by men. Each man in turn offers her a drink, she accepts, then drinks the drink and turns her attention to another man who repeats the process. After watching 5 men buy a drink for the woman, only to be frozen out of the conversation, Jack walks over to the now alone woman. He buys her a drink and then asks, would you have sex with me right now in my room for $1,000,000 in cash? "What would I have to do?" "Intercourse!" "$1,000,000 cash?" "Right." "Let's go" she said as she took his arm to lead him towards the hotel lobby and elevators. "Wait a minute," said Jack. "Would you make love to me for 25 cents?" "What kind of a girl do you think I am?" she queried. "Well, we already know what kind of girl you are. We are just haggling over the price!!"

Faith is very important. I would never want to take faith from anyone, nor try to break their faith by logic or showing contradictions in their faith. However, no one has the right to claim his/her faith any more valid than the next person's. If you have faith that you are on the correct path to eternal life with your God, you do not have the right to tell another person who has faith that they are on the correct path to eternal life with their God (or who worship the same God as you, but in a different way), that only your faith is true. If you want to feel it and believe it, fine. But do not put down other people's faith any more than you would want them to put your faith down. It is the "Golden Rule". Many people say, "Money is the root of all evil". They are wrong. "The Love of Money is the root of all evil". Many people say, "Never discuss religion". I believe they are wrong. "Never try to convince anyone that your faith is better than their faith" would be more appropriate. I have spent much of the last 7 years speaking to people in person and through forums about religion. It has caused me to listen and to go to the Bible to verify or disprove what was said. I had read the Bible cover to cover, first when 17 and then about 19 to 20. I started reading it much more while talking to people about religion. I then read the "Holy Qur'an". It was illuminating. I am reading "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren right now. I am attending church regularly for the first time in 40 years. Why? Because I got interested in religion by talking about it. I found that many people of faith know the Bible very well. I found that many people of faith don't know the Bible very well or at all. I found that many people of faith take the Bible and use it for very unchristian behavior. I found that many people of faith who claimed to be Christian only knew the "Old Testament" or at least only quoted the "Old Testament". I found that many people of faith who claimed to be Christian never practiced the teachings of Jesus Christ, but claimed that they had a personal relationship with him. I found that many people of faith who claimed to be Christian really acted towards other people in the way that Jesus wanted us to act towards people. But most of all, I found that only by reading and talking could I have found these things out. I never had to put down anyone's God. I did many times question the use of their claims that only their faith was correct. I even chastised people who said that all believers of this protestant sect or all Roman Catholics or all Jews or all Muslims would go to hell for not believing in the ways of their (only true and correct) way of worshiping (their only true God). I have had people tell me that they are not condemning those people to hell, “it is in the Bible. It is word for word in the Bible". When I look up the passage, it does not say that "word for word". When I tell them that, they say "well what that means is..." Sorry, that is an interpretation, their interpretation, not "word for word". The Bible and/or the "Holy Qur'an" can be read as "word for word" or it can be read as stories to help you in your life and help you gain eternity. Some people call me a "Cafeteria Christian" because I don't believe in certain things in the Bible, but then when I ask them about certain passages, they say that the passage doesn't mean what it says "word for word" or that was replaced by the "New testament". My point is that there is more than enough Bible interpretation to last for a few millennia. Faith is wonderful, except when used to put other people's faith down. I believe that was the idea behind the post that started this thread. TOM PS: When I used the word "you" above, it was rhetorical and not addressed to anyone.

Tonja, go on a hunger strike to protest the insurance company.:mad: Of course I am kidding, but please don't do the opposite, which is eat to calm your nerves. It took many of us months to get approval and some people I know where turned down at first, but after complaining and taking the request to a higher level, they were approved. Don't let this waiting game get you down. Stay positive and fight the urge to over-eat. It's hard, but it is good practice.

When a plane crashed killing many, but leaving many alive, among the people onboard was a family of 4; husband, wife, son and daughter. The wife and her daughter both died, while the husband and his son wound up in the hospital. A TV newsman asked the man a question, but rather than answer, the man responded with "first I have to thank God for saving my son and me." When asked how he felt about his wife and daughter dying while he and his son survived, "who are we to question God's ways?" Then there was the man interviewed after his wife, who had been using fertility drugs, gave birth to 7 children. "How do you feel being a father of 7 children?" "Before I say anything else, I have to thank the good Lord..." No!! The good Lord did not want his wife to have children. That's why she was infertile.

My mother was the eldest sibling born into a Roman Catholic family of 6. She was two years older than her brother and then there was a 10 year gap followed by two more children. My grandfather was ill for many years and after the doctors gave up, many friends of the family brought "healers" to the house. When my mother was 17, a Pentecostal minister "healed" my grandfather. My mother and her eldest brother refused to convert when grandpa decided that the family would become Pentecostal from thence on. I was raised as a Roman Catholic, but spent many weekends with my grandparents who's idea of a good time was going to a Pentecostal church at least 4 times a week. I spent more time in Pentecostal churches than Catholic churches. When my mother died, we had 3 days of wakes, 2 sessions a day. My grandfather was told that he could have as many Pentecostal ministers as he wanted lead the visitors in pray services, but that at 8pm on the last day of the wakes, a Catholic priest would be there to give the final prayer services (as was my mother's wishes). The room reminded me of a civil war, with the aisle being the Mason-Dixon line. Pentecostal on one side and Catholic on the other. Over 12 Pentecostal ministers came to pray before the Catholic priest arrived. When the priest arrived, we reminded my grandfather, but he had a Pentecostal minister start a sermon just after the priest got there anyway. I was 19 at the time and could not believe the fight that took place between the Pentecostal minister and Catholic priest. It culminated in the Catholic priest decreeing, "This woman will burn in Hell because of these heathens praying over her". I accosted the priest and gave him a lecture. "Who the Hell are you to condemn my mother to burn in Hell because of the acts of someone else?" He calmed down and after the Pentecostal minister was escorted out, he performed the service. I lived with my grandparents on Long Island not too long after that and every week a different Pentecostal minister was invited for Sunday dinner. Their prize was to convert me. We would debate religion for hours. 42 years later, I am a Christian, thought neither Catholic nor Pentecostal. Religion is the antithesis of Godliness IMHO. Jesus would be sick to see what has been done in his name.

I was going to post online the pictures of me when I started school, but the stone tablets broke while I tried to run them through my scanner.:faint:

I wonder how many other children have been killed since JonBenet? Why is it that some stories just keep going and going? Maybe her name should have been JonBenet Timex. Did anyone know that the same day that the Central Park Jogger was raped (and left for dead), that less than two miles away, another women was forced (by knife or gun, I forget) to ride the elevator to the roof of a tall building, stripped, raped and thrown from the roof? As she fell, she was saved by becoming entanged in the cable TV wires strung between buildings. She was rescued by people who dragged her from the wires stark naked. Why didn't that story get any press? Why was the Central Park Jogger's story so much more important? Is it the media or the people? Chicken or egg?

Each of us are "haves" regarding some attributes and "have nots" regarding other attributes. I assure you that if you were a plane crash surviver (like in the TV series "Lost") you would rather have me with you than Bill Gates or Donald Trump. As long as we didn't talk to each other, I could probably do more things since I have experiance with working with my hands and mind. The two billionaires while getting credit for doing things usually only do the paperwork. Getting back to the question. My point was that many (if not most people) forgive themselves for their "havenots" while comparing themslves on the attributes in which they are "haves" with people who are "have nots" on those attributes. Like I did with the billionaires compared to myself. Now most people would compare the billionaires to me and find me wanting because most people are thinking of money. I have a beautiful wife (for 39 years), much too beautiful for me, most people think. When people tease her and ask why she married me, she says "because of his personality" and they believe her. When people ask "the Donald's" 20 year old girl friend (de jour) why she dates him and she says "because he has a great sense of humor", do many people believe her?

A lot of people say "Oh God", "Dear Jesus", "Oh my Lord" as they are reaching orgasm. So what does that prove?

Amen, Sister!!:clap2:

I have a way of thinking which involves the use of analogy. I was trying to make a point about how people who do "have", do not appreciate what they have and can not see why people who don't "have", can not accomplish, do or make the same decisions or progress that they make. I used Donald Trump as an example. Money and education were his "haves". There are other "haves" besides money. We here at Lap-Band-Talk all have a short-coming regarding our ability to get to and to stay at a safe and healthy weight. Most of us bristle when people make fun of our weight or make fun of our decision to seek a Lap-Band for help. Yet many people, both members here at this forum and others, can not see how some people in New Orleans didn't have the resources to leave. If you would have found a way to leave no matter what, that's great for you. But would you want someone to say to you, "I would find a way to lose weight no matter what." Considering that more people die from obesity than die from hurricanes each year, I do not think that the analogy is far-fetched. You asked. I explained. I hope I did a good job. TOM PS: The Donald's looks were just a thrown in satirical remark I made about him: "You wouldn't catch me on those corny TV reality shows even if I was as famous and handsome as the Donald."

Enjoy TOM, PS: Why does a message have to be 10 characters? What was wrong with just "Enjoy"?

You are right. But I never fight. I am a lover, not a fighter.:faint: I am glad that the people of New Orleans which is a particularly vulnerable place because of its elevation are spared. Ernesto was predicted to be a category 3 if it had spent the required time in the Gulf to reach there. I am sorry that someone else has to suffer in their place, but we all have to share in the misfortunes of life. Let's pray, or hope, whatever way you express yourself, that mother-nature gives us a helping hand and that all Ernesto does is Water the grass and forests that need the rain so badly. TOM PS: You wouldn't catch me on those corny TV reality shows even if I was as famous and handsome as the Donald.

Let's see, I bought a house in 1973 for less than $39,000 and sold it in 2003 for $400,000. Gee, that is better than 10 to one. If I had $5,000,000 in 1973 and I had bought 125 houses, they would have been worth over $50,000,000 in 2003. Between 2003 and 2006, the property I sold went to $500,000. It was worth only $25,000 in 1967. I checked with my neighbors after I moved in. So from 1967 to 2006, the property appreciated 20 to one. If someone had given me $5,000,000 in 1967, I could have bought 250 houses and sold them in 2006 for $100,000,000. That would have been if I was stupid enough to have bought them for cash. Of course, I would have bought them with small down payments and rented them out. I might be worth $1,000,000,000. But my stupid father went off and got killed fighting the Germans in WWll on the day after I was born, so no $5,000,000 and no free college education. Conclusion: Donald Trump is a much better man than I.

The DNA was not that of a family member.

The interview was in the 70's. The gift was in the 60's. It would be 6 times the value or $30,000,000 if it was given in 1968.

And you might be a better person than many of those people in New Orleans, but that was no excuse for what happened to them.

It isn't me who has declare a disaster. It is Jeb Bush. As I said, I started this thread to bring attention to the people of New Orleans. It still looks like a third world garbage dump. And I am sure you are right. But too many people think that being poor in the USA is the ultimate sin. People need to be compassionate even when it is not their neighbor on their block or in their city or in their country. Are we all not God's children? I heard Donald Trump on TV being interviewed many years ago. Mr. Trump described himself as a "self-made" man. The interviewer asked him, "Didn't your father put you through college and give you $5,000,000 to start you off?" "What's $5,000,000?" the Donald asked. Well that was back in the early 1970's, so $5,000,000 is probably worth about $30 to $50 million in todays money. I am not saying that anyone here is so unappreciative of what they were given, but sometimes we take too much for granted.

Do you think that I went to the only gas station in town? Of course I cruised around for a few minutes to pick out one with a short line.

"Love it or Leave it". Are those today's words of compassion? I know many people in the Lake Okeechobee area for example who have very little more than their home and have worked their whole lives for meager wages. Their homes are not worth enough to sell and buy elsewhere without taking a substantial financial hit. These are hard-working Americans who's only problem is low wages and high wind speeds. Many of those people were Americans who work, but didn't have the financial resourses to leave. Many did not have cars. Many did not have enough money for Gas to make a round trip to any safe haven. Many live paycheck to paycheck and did not have the ability to evacuate. Maybe people like that are not worth being kept alive. If you can't succeed in America, you must be worthless. Maybe Darwin is right, only the strongest should survive. No. I don't buy that!!

Sure you could have said it better. You could have quoted Barbara Bush,"What I'm hearing, which is sort of scary, is they all want to stay in Texas," Barbara Bush said in an interview on Monday with the radio program "Marketplace." "Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality." "And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway," she said, "so this is working very well for them."

I just got back from filling my car with gas. I filled the truck and my gas cans yesterday. The lines are about 30 minutes long and the station I went to only had Premium. Premium, contrary to popular opinion is not good for a car that requires regular, not only not good, but actually bad for a car that requires regular. An x-coworker of mine was using Premium in his Camry from the time he bought it new. One day, it would not start and he had it towed into Toyota. The mechanic who fixed it said, "It looks like you have been using Premium". Toyota repaired the car under warrantee, but told him that next time, they will charge for the repair because it says in the owners manual to use 87 octane unleaded. One tank of Premium will not do any damage to me car nor will the extra 20 cents per gallon break my piggy-bank. More important than that, there was almost a fist-fight today at the gas station when someone jumped the line. It wound up with people pulling the person who had waited properly away from the one who had jumped to the front. Why is it that the good always suffer for the bad? I wonder how many people will be hurt even if the storm misses us completely? I started this thread out of a feeling of compassion for the people of New Orleans. I had no idea that it might impact me.

Have you received the e-mail that starts of with(?): You gotta love Robin Williams...... Even if he's nuts! Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect Plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and Repeat this message. "I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for Peace. So, here's one plan." It Is Another HOAX But even if Robin Williams had said it, it is still BS. 1) "The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those "good 'ole' boys", we will never "interfere" again. Hitler and Mussolini declared war on the US. We did not defeat Stalin. Noriega and Hussein were tools of the USA who had outlived their usefulness to the USA and most of the rest of the world was not concerned about them. The USA only did themselves a favor by ousting them. Oh, they also did Iran a big favor, by disposing of Hussein. Now Shiites dominate the region. Maybe if BuSh had read his father's book, instead of blaming his father for 911, Iran wouldn't be in such a strong position. 2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea, the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence. I wish we would withdraw our troops. The USA has troops in over 130 nations. Can you name 130 nations? Can you name even 100? But your tax dollars are going there. If we stop the Mexicans from coming in, who is going to pick your fruits and vegetables? Either we will be faced with tripling of produce prices or we will get our produce from overseas, putting farmers out of business. That also goes for chicken and other meat-packing operations. 3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them. It is estimated that it would cost $20,000,000,000 (that's 20 billion dollars to deport all the illegal aliens). I would rather see that 20 billion TAX DOLLARS used for rebuilding New Orleans or so many other important projects. And what do we do with illegal alien mothers who have American children? Do we split the family up and put the children into our overtaxed foster care system or do we send these American children to a live of poverty in Mexico? Punish the children? 4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers. I guess the person who wrote this had not been in an hospital lately or else he would know that the USA does not produce enough doctors, so many of our doctors are now from terrorist countries and many other countries. The USA is also raiding other countries to get nurses to move here to relieve the nursing shortage. I guess the author also did not know that because the USA does not graduate enough nuclear engineers, that the USA imports over a quarter of a million people from (terrorist) Pakistan every year to do our nuclear engineering. As far as cab-drivers and 7-11's are concerned, the next time you need a cab or want something late at night, I bet you would rather have a cab with a driver of any nationality than to stand waiting for hours. Same goes for 7-11; better to have a foreign clerk than find the 7-11 with a sign, "Closed". Not many "real" Americans want to ruin there health staying up all night for minimum wage. 5) No foreign "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby. #5 is too stupid to even comment on. 6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while. The USA was making an effort to become energy self-sufficient under under Jimmy Carter, but Ronald Reagan canceled all of Carter's programs. Drilling in Alaska will not produce enough oil to make a dent in our energy problem and it will be 10 years before that oil will reach the market. There are ways to start becoming energy self-sufficient today. People do not need 300 horse-power trucks to drive around in for pleasure. Brazille is energy self-sufficient, because it's government had the gumption to pass laws to push business in the right direction. Using vegetation to make fuel can help make the USA energy self-sufficient and it will reduce the green-houses gases causing global warming. 7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.) This e-mail must have been written by a man from China or India. China and India would love the USA to do that. Hey, I have a way to put drug dealers out of business. Tell all the junkies to offer their dealer $1.00 for a dime bag. When I stop laughing, I will refute #8. 8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere." They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything. I guess no one read the news about all the countries that contributed money to the victims of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita. Mexicans were helping before FEMA got there. The author should not be so flippant about Allah. Allah is the same God as the God of the Old Testament and the New Testament (the Bible, to those less informed). Allah is the Arabic translation of "God". If you travel to Italy and land at Rome's airport, you will not see signs saying Rome. The signs will say Roma. If you travel to Venice, you will not see signs saying Venice. The signs will say Venezia. If you are in Spain, and are thirsty, and someone offers you aqua, do you refuse it and say, "No thanks, give me some water"? Aqua is water, Roma is Rome, Venezia is Venice and Allah is God. 9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens. Then why was BuSh so adamant about enforcing UN resolutions against Hussein in 2003 that he invaded Iraq? Then why was BuSh so adamant about enforcing the UN's Gulf-War treaty against Hussein? 10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH...learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan? "The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, "you want a piece of me?" If you agree with the above forward it to friends...If not, and I would be amazed, DELETE it!! No, the language of this country is not English. It could have been if the original 13 colonies had not stolen so much land from Spain and Mexico. Did you ever wonder why so many cities have names like San Fransisco, Las Angeles, Las Vegas? Because we took them from Spanish speaking countries and they were full of Spanish speaking people. Maybe if we hadn't brought so many Chinese to the USA to build our railroads, we could be a English speaking country. Maybe the Statue of Liberty should also say, "No WOP's allowed". Isn't WOP (With-Out Papers) the same thing as an illegal alien? WOP is what my Italian ancestors were nick-named. How soon we forget. I saw a border guard complaining on TV about the "illegals" coming over the border. His name was Gonzales. I wonder how his ancestors got here. Maybe, instead of forwarding this e-mail, the people who are so dissatisfied with the problems in the USA should have just packed up their belongings to go back to where there ancestors came from. If you are Irish/Italian-American, well then cut your head off and send it to Ireland and send your body to Italy. Sounds stupid? Not much more than the e-mail being forwarded. Love to all, TOM PS: BS means Balogna Sandwich

You are right, I'll go back to Brooklyn and take my chance with the street crime and snow. Nah, I'll try California with the gang violence and earthquakes. Or maybe the plains states with their tornadoes and drug problems. I hope you are right and no one dies or suffers catastrophic damage. I hope we don't have to see more New Orleans, Mississippi destruction type stories, either. But you can't run and you can't hide, so I am sorry if you think that I am being alarmist by letting people know what might happen. I will be more than happy to tell you, "You were right" if Ernesto makes a sharp right hand turn as soon as it leaves Cuba. I wonder how many people died in Cuba, the Dominican Republic and Haiti?

You need to seek emotional help. The surgeon who performed my surgery had an emotional support group that I went to once before surgery and many times after surgery. In my book, there are only two kinds of people: Those seeing a mental health professional and those who should be seeing a mental health professional. Seek out help. I do not know if there are 12 steps groups like CoDependents Anonymous or such in your area and I don't know enough about you to know which 12 step program might be most appropriate, but please seek help. You are not a failure and you did not waste $16,000. You are depressed. Many of us are depressed after such a life altering event as Lap-Band surgery. It is as if we just went to a funeral for our best friend. We have just lost our life long companion: food. I hope you are not offended by my insistence that you get emotional help. Many people equate the need for emotional help with pictures of asylums. There is much stigma placed on mental help by some people. That is their mental problem. Please take care of yourself. Things can only get better. Some day you will look back at this and laugh.