Tired_Old_Man
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Investigating/Excited/Anxious/Courious
Tired_Old_Man replied to NRust's topic in Tell Your Weight Loss Surgery Story
Glad to meet ya: Feel free to ask away. If we don't know the answer, we will tell you that it is a question for a doctor. -
I'll settle for a suitcase full of $100 bills.
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I wish I had good news and bad news, but the good news seems to be either sparse or nonexistent. I just got back from my doctor. For the bast few mouths, my Lap-Band has been defilled to empty. I have gained over 30 pounds because of lack of band restriction, lack of will-power and because my right knee has stopped me from exercising or even walking more than a few minutes. My right knee has been scoped thrice and my left knee twice. I had an MRI last week and went to see my doctor about the results today. I need a new knee. I was hoping to go back to work and had a job offer that would have allowed me to put at least $25,000 in the bank between now and my 62nd birthday, when the 6 month contract would have been completed and I would have stopped working and applied for Social Security. “Forget that” said the doctor. Too much damage to the knee. One missing cartilage, one cartilage torn, a lot of arthritis and a Baker's cyst. I started on “chicken beak” injections today. Actually they are called Hyalgan injections and they are made from the combs of roosters. The series of 5 weekly Hyalgan injections are supposed to fill in the gaps between the bones in the knee joint so that there will be some relief. Hopefully, I can start exercising, get a fill, lose some weight and be in better shape to accept an artificial knee in a year or so. I now have to figure a way to make some money without doing manual labor or constant walking. How would I look as a 61 year old Dominoes pizza Delivery Boy?
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In my case, it was not attorneys, but working in the aviation industry which helped to shape my Quest for verbal perfection. It was definitely a family trait, perfectionism as much as talking, but being afraid to bring down a plane full of people was a contributing factor. I became extremely good at my job and other mechanics would compete against me, in a situation similar to the old West's top gunslinger syndrome. If any mechanic could show me up, he would become "Top-Gun" because, most people knew that TOM was “Top-Gun” at fixing planes. For about 5 years, I did not work on planes, but instead worked on the simulators that the pilots practiced on. One day, as my fellow technician Keith was leaving for the day as his shift was ending and mine beginning, we exchanged information on two problems. I knew how to fix what had been troubling him and he knew the procedure for something that had confounded me. The next day, we crossed paths again and both of us said that we were unable to solve our problems by applying each other's advice. We then each demonstrated on the the simulators in question what we had explained the previous day. Keith blamed me for not explaining properly the instructions I gave him which stopped him from being able to fix his problem. Then, Keith blamed me for not understanding properly the instructions he gave to me which stopped me from being able to fix my problem. So I asked, “if we were playing 'catch' and I threw you the ball and you didn't catch it, is my fault for throwing the ball wrong?” “Correct.” “And if you threw you the ball back to me and I didn't catch it, is my fault for trying to catch the ball wrong?” “Right.” “Why is it always my fault?” “Because you are smarter than me.” Being good is a heavy burden, but once you lift it, you can never put it down and in fact it will just get heavier and heavier, unless you want to just throw it all away.
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Of course I understood the meaning because it was the arrow that gave it away visually, but if he had left the arrow off, we would have know to use the left door. So the arrow could be considered as making it a double negative. But when we all understand the meaning, but the words are wrong, then how will we know when the words are right? At an open seating event, like a concert, a husband and wife are sitting down waiting for the show to start. The woman decides to make a restroom run before the show starts. While she is gone, a man walks up to the husband and asks, "Do you mind if I sit here?" The husband answers, "Yes." and the man sits down. "Excuse me sir, why are you sitting in my wife's seat?" "You said, 'YES'." I have seen this happen over and over again, except usually the "YES" meant it was ok to sit. WHY? Because people try to be overly polite, do not want to ask a begging question or maybe a question which gives the person sitting down too much control or power, so they do not ask, "can I sit her?" Many times I have asked, "Do you mind if I sit here?" and when the person answered "Yes", I walked away only to be called back to say it was ok to sit there, or I have asked, "Is it ok for me to sit here?" and was told "no", then left and then called back, or "Is anyone sitting here?" and when told "Yes" and then left, I was called back. When I would strike up a conversation about what had happened (and you knew that I would), I am usually told, "you knew what I meant" or "I knew what you meant". Apparently they were wrong, because I went by the words not what I could have assumed that they meant. When people hear, "No toothpaste has been proven to be better than Crest at fighting cavities", most people think that Crest fights cavities better than Colgate. That is not what "No toothpaste has been proven to be better than Crest at fighting cavities" means. It means either "there may be other toothpastes just as good as Crest" or "no studies have been done to prove which toothpaste fights cavities best". Gracie Allen was told by her husband George Burns, “Harry went to Pete's house, but he was not home.” Gracie replied, “Of course Harry was not home, he was at Pete's house.” Everybody laughed, but Gracie was correct.
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I approached a store one day which had two glass side by side doors. The door on the right had a sign that said, “USE OTHER DOOR” with an arrow below the words which pointed to the left. I used the left door and walked to the counter and said to the store-clerk (who knew me for years), “you know Jeff, your sign is wrong”. “Why?” “That sign says to use the right door”, I replied to Jeff's amazement. I explained that the arrow pointed to the left door and then instructed the reader to use the other door. Since the only door designated was the left door (by the arrow), the other door would be the right door. “No! No!” Jeff insisted. “The arrow means use the left door.” “But the words say differently” I insisted. I explained it a few more time, but could not get agreement, so I asked a question to pin Jeff down. “If the words above the arrow had said, 'USE THAT DOOR', which door would you have used?” “The left door.” “So in your mind, 'USE THAT DOOR' and 'USE OTHER DOOR' both mean the same thing. Since 'USE' and 'DOOR' are in both sentences and are equal, then 'THAT' must also equal 'OTHER' for 'USE THAT DOOR' to equal 'USE OTHER DOOR'. But since 'THAT' does not equal 'OTHER', then 'USE THAT DOOR' and 'USE OTHER DOOR' are not equal. If 'USE THAT DOOR' above the left-pointing arrow means use the left door, then 'USE OTHER DOOR' above the same arrow can not mean use the left door.”
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Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
BuSh also appeals to people who watch police movies and TV shows, in which the cop always decides correctly who the criminal is without any need for real evidence. The cop then proceeds to violate every civil right and human right of the criminal. Of course the problem with both the movies and the people who watch them is that neither realizes that the criminals are not always actually criminals. The reasons why our system gives the ALLEGED CRIMINAL so many rights is because of the history of innocent people being railroaded into confessing. Years ago, the actor Clint Eastwood who was famous as the "break every rule" cop Dirty Harry ran for mayor of the small town were he lived. The conservative voters elected him thinking they were getting the conservative Dirty Harry as their mayer, but wound up with Liberal Clint Eastwood. Many Americans are still living in that same dreamworld when they praise and defend George W. BuSh. -
Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
Actually BuSh appeals to the schoolyard in us. His ideas of diplomacy remind me of the schoolyard brawls of my childhood, where children insulted each other's mothers and then fought. Of course there was always one gang leader around who would tell his boys to kick some weakling's butt, and then there was this guy who had a vicious dog that he would threaten everybody with. He never had to fight himself, because his dog was his military. -
Both are shrinking rapidly!!
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My wife wants to know who this girl-friend is that is making love to me. :help: "I am loving him" sounds like a euphemism for what someone might say while enjoying a night (or afternoon) of pleasure. :faint:
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Like this picture shows, people see and hear what they want.
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Except when one must communicate across group lines. I believe I told the story on this forum a while back about an experience as a maintenance crew-chief. There was a rule that allowed mechanics to swap shifts, so one day, a mechanic who was about 20 worked and who I had never met, worked on my shift and was assigned to me. I sent him out to check an aircraft. When he came back, I asked him how the tires were and he said "The Tires are Bad". I phoned the hangar to send the tire-changing equipment to me at the terminal and went out to see how many tires I would need. The tires all looked almost brand new with no problems what so ever. When I confronted the young mechanic, he said, "I told you they were BAD". I knew Michael Jackson's song "BAD" had gotten into the modern lexicon, but I never expected to hear it in a professional setting. I chewed the mechanic out and let him know that around aircraft we only use proper and standard English.
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Let me worn you of one of the big pitfalls you can expect to have. Your children may play you off versus (your soon to be) x-husband. When they don't get what they want from you, you will hear the infamous "But Daddy would..." refrain. It is not evilness from your children, so be neither too angry at them nor fall for it. Though I was never divorced, I have seen scenario this in action with family members that have been. Children, no matter how well they are raised, will resort to this subterfuge to get their way. I also tend to believe that there is a subconscious hope that by pitting one parent against the other, the parents might discuss the situation and that the ensuing dialog might lead to reconciliation. Of course the situation usually exacerbates the problems, but they are children fighting to keep their parents together. Again, I wish you the best during this difficult time in your life. And I will remind you one more time to assure your children over and over that they had nothing to do with your decision. They will think that they were the cause of the break-up, so repeat it often to them, "This has nothing to do with anything that you did."
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I saw a version of this done on TV. I believe it was at the John Jay college in Brooklyn. Eye-witness accounts are very respected by juries, but are not even 50% accurate in most cases. There are differences types of eye-witness accounts. If Mrs. TOM told the police that I beat her, that eye-witness account would be 100% accurate. If Mrs. TOM told the police that she was beaten by our next door neighbor, that eye-witness account would be 100% accurate. If Mrs. TOM told the police that she was beaten by a stranger of the same race, that eye-witness account would be about 50% accurate. If Mrs. TOM told the police that she was beaten by a stranger of a different race, that eye-witness account would be less than 25% accurate.
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I disagree with the bilingual part because, I was the only white man on my block and one of the few in the area, but I could understand and could be understood by those that spoke the non-standard English. I admit, that since I was brought up in racially diverse areas, I had a head start and because I didn't look down on people who did not (though many could if required) speak standard English. I was saying that most store-owners who are either white or (many) older black people who were hiring help, would hire the person who says, "I am looking for a job" over the person who says "I be wanting a job". As I mentioned: the headlines of Oakland's decision to teach Ebonics was a distortion of the truth. They wanted the teachers to learn Ebonics to be able to help the students bridge the gap from standard English to Ebonics. Note: I am only saying "Ebonics" because it is easier to write than "the non-standard version of English often spoken in Black neighborhoods". I believe also, that it is a myth that the teens and children speak this language in their homes. I had many Black acquaintances in my Brooklyn neighborhood and those in my age bracket or even as much as 15 to 20 years younger did not speak Ebonics or allow their children to speak Ebonics to them. The children may have spoken Ebonics to their siblings in their home and to their peers in the streets, but not to their parents. Yet they would try to speak it in school and many would rather be a failure in their teacher's eyes, than a sell-out in front of their peers. I know we have now gotten a a mile away from the original question that I asked regarding the type of sentence from the McDonald's commercials, but these things happen. “I am loving it.” or “I Love it”
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Nobody can answer those questions. Many of the members here have done very well. I suggest you look around for the threads on "Would you do it again?" I know I would. This is not a fairy tale. "And they lived happily ever after!" It is the start and it will take a lot of work. But, you can do it and we will be here to help.
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The main form of perceived abuse (of my wife) is from the quantity of words that flow from my mouth. I try to make sure that I am understood. Many people miss the subtleties of the spoken word and the ease at which a simple sentence can be misinterpreted. My poor wife's burden is having to hear me make sure that I am understood.
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It is more that just language. Many years ago I watched a movie. The same robbery scene was shown over and over as each person who was involved told what they saw (or perceived they saw). I can't seem to remember the title of this movie, but it was great at showing how perceptions are (each person's) reality.
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Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
And since this new law will work so well with the 100% conviction and execution rate, why not expand it to other areas? 10 women who meet weekly to discuss (sometimes spelled gossip) this and that can be arrested, interrogated, tried and convicted (based on their confessions) and then executed for Witch-Craft. Ah, the Good Old Days!! -
Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
And since this new law will work so well with the 100% conviction and execution rate, why not expand it to other areas? 10 Liberals who meet weekly to discuss in disgust what the BuSh 11 administration has done can be arrested, interrogated, tried and convicted (based on their confessions) and then executed for treason. Ann Coulter for President. -
Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
And one more thing, if a prisoner is 100% innocent, but BuSh 11 decides that the extra methods or interrogation can be used on him and he confesses to anything and everything the interrogator believes he has done to stop the agony, and is then tried in the special court in which that confession is allowed to be used and sent to his death; who is guilty of murder? The executioner? The Interrogator? BuSh 11? Congress? You? Me? -
Poll - Democrat or Republican?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
Torture is not only inhumane and indecent, but it is highly ineffectual. Also, when the interrogator assumes that the person knows something and proceeds to torture, what can the outcome be if the prisoner does not know what his interrogator assumes? Even worse, what happens when the prisoner is 100% innocent of what the interrogator assumes? The vast majority (at least 90%) of the prisoners seen in the infamous Abu-Grab pictures, were released with no charges (or apologies) ever filed and most of the detainees who were transported half-way around the world to Guantanamo Bay have been released after 3 or 4 years, because they were also guilty of nothing but being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Who do does the BuSh administration think it is fooling? Saying Guantanamo Bay is not part of the USA out of one side of its mouth, but protecting it from Cubans with deadly force claiming that it is part of the USA with the other side of its mouth. Who do does the BuSh administration think it is fooling? Saying we don't torture and then sending people kidnapped off the streets and sending them to Syria, Jordan and Pakistan for interrogation that the USA would not do, but NOT TORTURE claims Condoleezza Rice. Pre-BuSh 11, most of the world looked up to the USA as a model of what nations should be like. In 6 years, BuSh 11 has ruined what it took 225 years to achieve: OUR REPUTATION. -
Poll - Are You Attracted To Overweight People?
Tired_Old_Man replied to KariK's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
That is an example of the self-hate that is sometimes harder to lose that our weight inself. It is also many times, one of the reasons why we became fat. -
Poll: Time off between surgery and work
Tired_Old_Man replied to laphappy's topic in General Weight Loss Surgery Discussions
I guess it always takes a man to organize these things correctly. As I did a few months ago on the last one of these "How Long to Get Back to Work?" type threads, I will suggest again that the responders mention what kind of work they do when then tell how long it took to get back to work. Someone who is an executive and sits at a desk all day may be able to return to work in 1/10th of the time of a person who works stocking shelves for Home Depot or Wal-Mar, or someone who loads luggage onto a plane or train. A high school teacher may be able to return to work quicker than a pre-school teacher. Except for the the cases that have made the news lately, high-school teachers don't pick-up their students. -
Is my underwire bra gone forever?
Tired_Old_Man replied to jahair's topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
I don't wear a bra, but it sounds like water retention to me. Sometimes the water pumped into through IV during surgery seems to cause bloating, but it is normally temporary.