NewBeginnings2018

I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded. I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman. I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off! Chris :cocktail:

Hey fellow MA bandsters, SherryW and I are interested in starting a thread for all our MA bandsters so we can get to know our neighbors! We hope you join in! I'll start..... My name is Chris, I am 32, have been overweight since I was 5 years old, although I am at an all-time high right now. My band date is October 2nd, and I cannot wait!! I am single and dating, I work in insurance, and I have a great and supportive family & group of friends - including SherryW and her DH. lol. Oh yeah, my mother is also getting banded, and she is having surgery one week before me. I'd love to meet my other MA bandsters and hear about your progress! Chris

It took me 3 fills at 2.75 to get real restriction and for me to think wow, this is how it's supposed to work. I had to have .25 cc's taken out about 8 months later because I developed reflux. I'm getting another fill at the end of January and I can't wait. Don't give up, and keep getting those fills.

Hey gals! I just wanted to pop in and let you know that Sherry is doing well and has a new band. Yeah Sherry!!!!!! I got a call from her DH this morning and he said she will be there overnight, but the doc said everything went great. It's been so long since I've been on this site, I didn't even recogonize it when I saw it! Wow! I've been so busy lately but things are going well. I started a new job about a month and a half ago, I'm still living with Curtis, and enjoying life. I had a partial unfill in early Sept and have put on 20 pounds. Ugh. I'm not giving up though and am keeping at it. Hope everyone is well!!!

Good for you April!!!! It's so hard to get into a good exercise routine, and you've done it! :cool2:

Missy so sorry to hear what's going on. But you did call him your boyfriend so I assume things are going well between you two. :thumbdown: Please let us know as soon as you can how things are going.

Apple I saw your pics on the before/after thread and you look GREAT! You've done a great job your first year out, and your second year will be just as great!

Jim I would definitely make sure that you use your doctor's office for support too. It is tough to change our bad habits and really, that is the only thing that is really going to get the weight off. When we have a good fill level the band forces us to change some of those habits, but we still have to do others on our own. And it's downright hard. No doubt about it. My personal motto has been all about finding balance. I need to be able to eat a not super-strict diet, or I'll never stick to it. I can't work out 5 days a week, because I'll burn out. But I've found a way to eat healthier, and exercise a couple times of week and it's become a habit. When the scale slows down, which it often does, I just stick with it and work on changing another habit. So they are all small changes that don't effect my daily life so much, but after two years there is a big difference in what I eat and how much. It will probably take me another year to lose the 18 pounds more I want to, but I know once I get there I will not have to worry about maintaining. YOU can do this Jim! We all can!

April I spent many years in love with people who never would give it back. It's so not worth it, as you know. I can honestly say that for whatever reason, I have never had a relationship like this before. I am treated with so much respect, kindness, and love. And I had to be almost 34 to find it! Ugh! But it is wonderful, and you will find it too! It took a lot of time and effort to really put myself out there, and then courage to refuse to settle for less than all I wanted, but it was fun at times and it really was worth it. You deserve it all apple, and you will get it! Curtis calls me his cracker, and I call him my pastrami. lol. So silly, I know. Pastrami came from me calling him my prince charming one day, and he said 'what? I'm your pastrami?' and it just stuck. lol

That's the thing too Denise, I am enjoying where we're at so much, I don't want to rush through all these great things. I want to enjoy living together, getting engaged, and then the marriage. I have waited so long to meet such a wonderful guy, but once I did all my fears about running out of time have settled. I feel like I can just "be" and enjoy the moment! Denise, I'm so happy things are going well for you still. :mad2: I knew you would find a good egg if you stuck with it.

It sure is different two years out, but stick with it guys! Start with small changes that become new habits, and make sure you are getting your protein in!

Marriage and kids were something we discussed when we first started dating because I wanted to make sure he wanted the same things I did. I also confirmed with him before I moved in that co-habitating wouldn't change anything. lol. I don't know, I guess now that I'm older I'm ok with cutting through the bullcrap. We talk a lot about our future, and this house with a kid in it, and I truly believe that we will end up married. My friends think he'll propose in October (our one year) but I think this time next year is probably when it will happen. Don't ask me why, it's just my gut feeling.

This is how it all begins ladies! And here I am almost a year out with my sweetie and I couldn't be happier!

Yeah Missy I dated a guy that worked way too much and made no time for me. Actually I dated two of those and then realized at some point if the guy REALLY wanted to be with me - he would. We're too great to settle for anything less than everything we want and deserve in a relationship so I 'm glad you broke it off. Have some fun dating! :biggrin: Denise happy to hear things are still going well for you and your man. :scared2:

Hey Mergatroy! The weightloss definitely does slow down but it will still come off. Finding the right restriction is key. Have you thought about going into the monthly support groups at BIDMC? It's a bit far for me, so I typically don't go, but if you're in Newton that's probably not a bad ride. I think the band forces us to deal with all sorts of issues we have, and it's a growth process. It's great that you know what you are struggling with and I'm sure just talking about it will help you work through it. I think one thing a lot of overweight people share is that we take care of everyone else before ourselves and it's ok for it to be time for you!

Hey girlies - blast from the past. haha! Nana found me on myspace and I told her I'd make sure to pop in and say hello to everyone. I do lurk now and again, but don't post a whole heck of a lot. Things have been busy, which is nothing new for me. But life is good, great actually. :drool: I moved in with Curtis, have FINALLY started hitting the gym, and am just enjoying life! So today was fun, but man am I paying for it now! lol. We went to a wine tasting in Stonington CT and spent the day (which was 95, sunny, and humid) sitting in a field drinking wine, then we went to dinner at a great steakhouse and I had a super yummy meal. I didn't eat too much, but came home and pretty went to bed shortly thereafter so I woke up uncomfortable and decided to come surf the web. lol. No reflux so to speak, but I think dinner is still sitting there - and maybe some of the wine too. lol. Anyway, thanks for finding me Pat! I'm glad to see all you guys are still doing well.

Oh Dez I've been waiting to hear about your little bundle of joy! Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have my two year follow up the day before, so I'm not sure if I'm going in for the reunion or not. Can you believe it'll be two years already??!! I may be able to be convinced to go in two days in a row though. :thumbup:

Oh Denise I am SOOOOOOOOOO happy to hear this!! I know there were times you were discouraged - I'm glad you stuck it out and found a great guy! Things are great here, and I am so happy! I'm all moved in and taking over the decorating duties. lol. Curtis is definitely my best friend and the love of my life. You might meet some sketchy people from Match, but we're proof that if you stick it out you can find a good catch! Congrats Denise! :thumbup:

So Denise, I'm just checking in to see how things are going with the new man???????

Denise you have come such a long way, and I'm so proud of you! I think it was a confidence thing for you and girl, it seems you've got it! Whoo Hooo! I'm really happy for you!!! Things are still great here. I am all moved in and we just got two kittens who are adorable. I'm far from being unpacked, but I have a feeling that is going to take a while. lol.

Oh Denise that is so funny! And nice to know he really did send those emails out to the other people he was chatting with on match! I'm excited to see how this progresses.

Denise that is great! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! :thumbup:

Kat I had Fat Necrosis around my port incision after I was banded. It's such a weird term, and a weird thing! Sounds like your doc is watching things so you should be good. I am so happy things have gone so well and I can't wait to see updated pics! :w00t:

Haha, yes you're fine April. lol. I can get stuck at times, but I usually find it's when I eat too large of bites and don't chew them well enough. Not chewing is the biggest culprit for me!